Greenberg (2010) Movie Script
(BlRDS CHlRPlNG)
(ROCK MUSlC PLAYlNG)
(TURN SlGNAL CLlCKlNG)
Are you going to
let me in?
Thank you.
Shoot, l left the ticket
in the car, l think.
lt's okay.
lt's under
"Phillip Greenberg."
lt's just one?
(STAMMERlNG)
lt's two shirts
and a pair of pants.
Do you mind if
it is all ones?
No problem.
Okay, sorry.
KlDS: Florence.
Hi, guys.
Let me put
this stuff down.
Hi, Mahler.
Florence!
We're going on vacation !
l know.
We're going to Vietnam.
l know.
But we will come back, right?
We're not going
to live there?
No, that's why
it's a vacation.
Are you going
to go with us?
No, remember?
l have to stay here.
Why?
Because l do.
Why?
Because the vacation
is for family members only,
so Mahler and l
have to stay in LA.
Mahler isn't coming?
l want Mahler to come.
Did you get
the neck pillow?
Yes. They didn't have
those chocolate-covered
rice balls.
Did you try Trader Joe's?
Yeah, and Bristol Farms.
Were you able to find
the liquid decongestant?
Shoot! Sorry. l'm sorry.
lt's okay, Florence.
Don't worry about it.
lt's fine.
No, no, no.
And can you tell the gardener
to check the sensor
on the sprinklers?
l'll tell Carlos.
There's a package
l need you to mail
to my father.
CAROL: What else?
PHlLLlP: l don't need
this many T-shirts.
CAROL: Did you tell her
about your brother?
My brother will
be staying here.
He might call
you with things,
questions or
an errand or two.
That's not a problem.
He's coming in
from New York.
He just got out
of the hospital.
ls he sick?
Not that kind of hospital.
He had a nervous breakdown.
Carol, come on.
lt's relevant.
He's fine.
Don't pack this skirt.
He really is fine now.
l mean,
he's delicate,
but. . .
We're hiring him to do
some work around the house.
He's a carpenter.
He's gonna make
Mahler a dog house.
He says he's going to.
That'll look nice.
We hope.
Have a great trip,
you guys.
Okay.
And l'll call you if
there's anything else,
which l'm sure there is.
lt's no problem.
l want you
to come with us.
And you'll confirm
the car service and
flight info for tonight?
Yes, and l'll put
the cars in the garage.
Okay, and we can
call or e-mail.
l'm sure there's
e-mail in Vietnam.
l think there's
e-mail everywhere.
l forgot to
write you a check.
What do we owe you now?
Don't worry about it.
lt's three weeks. . .
Oh, Florence,
you have to speak up.
l'm out of checks.
l want Mahler to come.
l know, l know,
but it's fine.
l'll give you
cash in the meantime.
No, no. Don't worry
about it. lt's really. . .
lt's better this way.
Because then l don't
spend it all at once.
Are you sure?
l'll leave it for you
in the kitchen drawer
before we go.
l'll let my brother know.
Okay.
Okay.
Bye.
Okay.
l'll see you soon.
lt's okay.
Let's say goodbye.
Bye.
Bye, Florence.
Bye.
(OVER PHONE)
Florence, itis Gina.
l'm here. lt's packed.
Don't park on Alvarado,
park on Montana.
Don't wander away.
Okay.
Let's make a point
of sticking together.
Okay.
Can l borrow 40
bucks until tomorrow?
Yeah.
(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG)
(lNAUDlBLE)
(LAUGHlNG)
l was thinking
this morning that l've been
out of college now
for as long as l was in,
and nobody cares if l
get up in the morning.
Florence,
it's time to go home now.
l'm gonna stay.
l don't know. . .
l just got out of
a long relationship.
This isn't a relationship.
Right, l know.
Okay.
(TURN SlGNAL CLlCKlNG)
Are you going to
let me in?
No. Okay.
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
Hello?
Hi, this is
Roger Greenberg.
l'm Phillip's brother.
Oh, hey.
ls this Florence?
Sorry.
l'm quitting e-mail.
Okay. Hi.
There are people in the pool.
That's Marlon and Peggy.
Okay.
Your brother and Carol
let Marlon and Peggy
use the pool.
Mmm-hmm.
There's more than two.
They don't come in the house.
Okay, thanks.
Your brother
left a check for me.
ls it okay if l come by?
Yeah, l'll be here.
(PEOPLE LAUGHlNG OUTSlDE)
ROGER: "Dear
American Airlines,
"l'm not much in
the habit of writing
letters of complaint.
"l think l could
have lived, and did,
"with the distance
between your rows.
"But my issue is not
with the lack of leg room,
"it is instead
with the quality of the
buttons on the seats.
"When l depress
my recliner button,
"l expect the chair
to recline.
"At the very least,
to move.
"This was not the case
with Seat 26C on
Flight 41 from JFK..."
(DOOR OPENlNG)
Hi, little Mahler baby.
Hi, l'm Florence.
l hope that this
isn't a bad time.
My check.
No, l guess it's fine.
Okay.
Do you want a treat?
Come here. Come here.
(LAUGHlNG)
His tongue's so scratchy.
Good dog.
(SONG STARTS PLAYlNG)
Remember how they used
to play this on the radio
every time it rained?
l'm not sure.
And if there was a fire,
they'd play Burn Baby Burn.
Or, what was it called?
Disco lnferno.
l don't think l know it.
lt's funny.
Before your time,
l guess.
You have to see
past the kitsch.
l can see past it.
Cool.
Phillip said if
you need anything,
l can go pick you up
groceries or things.
l'm okay.
You sure?
lt's not a problem.
Well, l guess l
could use some things.
Sure.
Make a list.
l'll be right back.
(FLORENCE URlNATlNG)
(TOlLET FLUSHlNG)
l'm gonna take
him on a W-A-L-K.
Oh, no. No, l got it.
Okay, cool.
Bye.
(DlALlNG)
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
(ON ANSWERlNG MACHlNE)
This is lvan. Leave a message
after the tone.
lvan, it's Greenberg.
How you doing, man?
ROGER: l'm in LA.
l'm here, actually.
ln from New York City.
So, give me a call.
l'm staying at my
brother's house.
He's in Vietnam.
l think he's
opening a hotel there
or something.
Give me a call, man.
lt'd be great to see you.
(AlRPLANE PASSlNG)
"Dear Mayor Bloomberg,
"l write as
a concerned citizen
that has finally had enough
"of the abominable
traffic noise that has
engulfed the city.
"lf you placed
a police officer
"at strategically
chosen corners of Manhattan,
"it would result in
the needed employment
of crime fighters,
"less crime and trafficking,
and a lower contingent
of horn-honkers.
"lf you're into green. . ."
And who isn't?
". . .it'll make for
a significant reduction
in noise pollution.
"lf they can do it in LA,
a car culture if
ever there was one,
"l'm confident we can do it
here in Manhattan."
lt's true.
No one really honks here.
Yeah. ln LA,
they understand the horn
is for emergencies only.
ln New York,
it's a constant.
Yeah.
l don't know.
l don't really recognize
New York anymore, you know?
"You might be
interested to know
"that in the relatively
recently acquired
state of Hawaii,
"there's a law on the books
that prohibits the honking
of horns entirely.
"Yours in hopes
of green sound,
Roger Greenberg."
When did you get in?
Only Monday.
You're the first
person l called.
No, l didn't mean. . .
No, l know.
l was just saying.
Right.
How long you staying for?
About six weeks.
Can you imagine
going to Vietnam?
What, to fight?
Well, to fight, too,
but l just meant now.
My brother and his wife
are there on vacation.
l don't know.
Some people like to travel.
That's my brother's
wife's daughter, Sara.
My step-sister?
Niece.
She's at UC Santa Cruz.
Uh, no, thanks, man.
l don't really
drink anymore.
Okay.
Yeah, it's for the best.
l've got into
these Arnold Palmers.
lced tea, lemonade.
Yeah, l don't have that.
l thought l'd told you.
l guess l think we
talk more than we do.
The beard is cool.
Yeah.
You know,
it's a winter beard.
l probably shouldn't
be on the table here.
Maybe don't sit
on the speaker.
Oh, sorry.
So, what do you
want to do today?
Um, Beller's having
a barbeque, which means,
you know. . .
Oh, what's he up to?
He directs television.
He calls me up with
computer questions.
What a dick.
He always offers to pay.
Yeah, still rude.
Let's not do that.
Uh. . .
What else, man?
We could get
a drink at a bar,
we could stay here.
They have videos.
Yeah.
l think l saw Mannequin.
And, uh, Gung Ho?
l remember that
being funny.
Gung Ho's good.
Yeah.
lt'd be interesting
to watch it now.
ln the day?
l meant now,
like, you know. . .
Oh, these days. Yeah.
Now,
as opposed to
when it was made.
Yeah, sorry.
l'm not sure
about these pants.
They look flarey to you?
No, l think
that's the style.
(SlGHS) l feel like
l should have
worn jeans.
No one's going
to be dressed up
at this thing.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Fabula and l are on
this trial separation.
Oh. Uh-huh.
lt's a lot to go into.
l feel terrible
for Victor, you know.
l'd love you to meet him.
He's like
a little person now.
Yeah, l saw him
a few years ago.
Yeah, but now he's eight.
He's like a friend.
He's fun to hang out with.
l'm glad you're here, man.
lt's good for me to
get out like this.
Want to put your blinker on?
IVAN: Casa de Beller.
Keep going. Keep going.
Keep going.
What a fucking nightmare.
Maybe we can park here.
No, no, no. Let's go home.
l shouldn't have let
you talk me into this.
lt's a nightmare here.
lt's this kind of shit. . .
l can't find a movie
l want to go to
in the fucking multiplex,
or when l'm in Starbucks,
l hear music l actually like.
But we drove all
the way out here.
Let's have one drink.
(ROGER SlGHS)
(POP MUSlC PLAYlNG)
ls this a fucking
children's party?
Beller, how are you?
l'm good.
Hey, man.
Johno.
Hey, Greenberg,
what are you doing out here?
You know. . .
Hey, Beth.
Oh, my God. Hey.
Should l know?
Are you really
big or something?
No, Megan.
l didn't know
you were out here.
l wasn't.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, dude, or what about
Your Grandma's Pussy?
lt's like Anaconda,
with seven cards down.
l'm fair to middling.
You know.
Leonard Maltin would give me
two-and-a-half stars.
l haven't seen you since,
probably, like 1 0 years ago.
ln his movie guide.
Yeah, l think it was
actually Matt Levy's wedding.
l'm all shits
and giggles today.
Yeah. l think you'll find
l'm pretty much all shits.
lt's sad about Matt Levy.
Yeah.
Wait, what happened?
Oh, you didn't hear.
He died.
(EXHALES)
JOHNO: Texas Hold 'em is dead.
BELLER: lt's dead.
You know,
that shit just
makes your lips drier.
l know.
There's Beth.
BELLER: She and Steven
are getting a divorce.
JOHNO: They were
a cool couple.
Are any of those yours?
Yes, mine are the one
in the bumblebee costume
and the one in
the devil costume.
l think that's The Flash.
All the men out here
dress like children,
and the kids dress
like superheroes.
Hi, Dad.
Hey, sweet pea.
Come to think of it,
Steven's kind of a less
Jewish-looking version of you.
Less? l'm not even. . .
l'm only half.
Yeah,
but you're doing this.
What's. . .
l'm thinking small.
ls this a Jewish gesture?
l don't know.
Beller,
always with the self-hatred.
You're sweating.
l am. Yeah.
Have you been to
one of Eric's seders?
Eric gave trees to lsrael.
Am l not allowed
to joke about it?
No, l know. l'm just
saying, since you said
"less Jewish-looking,"
because most people
think l look ltalian.
And since my mom was
actually Protestant,
l'm not actually
Jewish at all, so. . .
Good to see you.
What are you
doing these days?
You're in New York, right?
Yeah.
Making music?
Haven't played
music in years.
l'm a carpenter,
you know, for money.
But right now,
l'm really trying
to do nothing for a while.
That's brave at our age.
l'm here for a few weeks
at my brother's,
and wanna have
a drink or something?
Um. . .
Sure. Okay.
ROGER: "Dear Starbucks,
"in your attempt to
manufacture culture
out of fast-food coffee,
"you've been
surprisingly successful,
for the most part.
"The part that
isn't covered by
'the most part' sucks."
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
FLORENCE: Hello?
Florence, hey,
it's Roger Greenberg.
Hi.
Sorry, l'm eating.
That's okay.
You wanna have
a drink or something?
Um...
Sure. Okay.
Um. . .
ls there a bar you
know we can go to?
There's one
near my apartment,
but it's pretty lame.
Okay.
lt's in Culver City.
Do you want to
meet me there?
l don't drive.
Those are all
kind of cheesy.
You have the light.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. . .
Do you mind if we
stop by my house?
l left my purse. Sorry.
Do you need it?
l still get carded.
l don't read enough.
l'm such a bad reader.
ls that you?
Yeah, it's one
of the rare times
l was actually
happy around my dad.
Did you do that?
No, that's my niece.
lt's good.
She's four.
l want to have
a relationship with her,
she's just not
that friendly with me.
You want to see?
l got her these
puppets for her birthday.
They might be too old.
They have sticks.
Yeah. l'm sure
they'll be fine.
What do you have to drink?
Um. . .
Oh.
Okay, you don't
want to go to the bar?
lt's Friday.
The bars are probably
full of bridge
and tunnel people.
Or whatever the LA version
of bridge and tunnel is.
Sorry.
l don't really have. . .
There's a Corona Light
and some cheap tequila
someone left here once.
Shall we split
the Corona?
Okay.
(HlCCUPS)
l get the hiccups
when l first
drink carbonation.
Don't worry about it.
l'm wearing kind
of an ugly bra.
lt's like an ACE bandage.
There's no clasp.
Do you hear a train?
ls that a train?
l get kind of nerdy.
Don't worry about it.
Can we take it slow?
l'm sorry,
it's just that. . .
l just got out of
a long relationship,
and l don't want to
go from just having sex
to just having sex
to just having sex.
Who's the third
"just having sex"?
You, if we had sex.
Okay,
then who's the second?
A guy l met at
this gallery thing.
You slept with him?
Yeah, l did.
How did that go?
What do you mean?
The sex?
Yeah. Well. . .
lt was pretty awkward.
What is that
on your lip?
What?
ls that a. . .
Nothing.
No, it's not a cold sore.
You sure?
Yeah, l picked it.
Where's your bathroom?
This is so annoying,
but l have to call
my friend, Gina, back.
Sorry, it's just,
if l don't call her back,
then l'll be a bad friend.
She's always
got an emergency.
l'm sure it's nothing.
Uh, how far do you think
it would be to walk?
To your brother's?
Way too long,
like five miles.
You can stay here.
l have the dog and. . .
l can drive you.
This will only take a second.
You have to call
her right this moment?
Won't she understand
you're in the middle of a. . .
No, no.
l'll take you now. Sorry.
You know, l. . .
You don't have to do that.
You've got your robe. . .
Oh, no.
lt's not a problem.
l can probably call a cab.
Okay.
This is stupid.
l'm singing this Saturday
at this place on
Orange and Sunset.
l mean, if you feel like it.
l know it's last minute.
Oh, my friend Gina
made the flyers
and she wrote down
the address wrong.
l don't think. . .
What time?
Like 1 1 :30.
There's a lot of acts,
so it's kind of
hard to pinpoint.
Don't feel obligated.
We probably shouldn't
do this again.
l mean,
you work for my brother.
Yeah.
And l'm really trying to
do nothing right now.
That's cool.
And l've got to
stop doing things
just 'cause they feel good.
GlNA: A mental patient
just went down on you.
Why do you
say it like that?
He's not crazy.
Mmm-hmm.
A lot of people go
to insane asylums.
A lot of people
are in therapy,
they're not in
insane asylums.
He's also 40.
Jesus.
He seems vulnerable.
(WATER SPLASHlNG)
MAN: l'm awake now.
(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG OUTSlDE)
WOMAN 1 : That could happen.
WOMAN 2: What?
MAN: lt'd have to be
a super high-end
fucking garbage disposal.
You can't hold any
revelations l had
during a shamanic
ceremony against me.
(LAUGHS) There.
You're judging me.
That guy's there.
Oh, hey, what's up, man?
WOMAN: Hey.
Why am l still pissed off?
We were 25.
We finally got a break,
and you had to fuck it up.
l didn't like the deal.
lt was completely standard.
lt was a record deal,
Roger, okay?
lt was a very big
thing for us and
we were not gonna get
any better than that.
lt was corporate bullshit.
l didn't want
to be a slave to the
A and R department.
They'd fuck with the songs.
We had no control.
You were not the only person
in the band, Roger.
Do you understand that?
lt's morally reprehensible
what you did.
l'm sorry,
but l didn't want to do it
unless it was on our terms.
Well, you got your way,
you know.
There's no record.
There's no band.
There's your terms. Awesome.
Beller,
it was 1 5 years ago.
You're rich.
What do you care?
You've done all right.
lt doesn't matter.
No, it does matter.
You're not the person
who l thought you were.
What about lvan?
He's fixing computers now.
This could have
changed his life.
lvan was counting on it.
He co-wrote those
songs with you, man.
lvan wrote some of
the music with me.
Stop rationalizing.
lvan can take
care of himself.
l'm surprised
he still speaks to you.
You know,
why am l even here?
You're never gonna change.
(SlGHS)
What's that?
What's that sigh?
Nothing.
What are you doing?
Asshole.
(TlRES SQUEAL)
(HAMMERlNG)
Hey.
Go get it.
(ENGAGED TONE)
What the fuck?
(SlGHS)
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
FLORENCE: Hello?
Florence,
it's Roger Greenberg.
Hey.
Um. . .
Mahler's. . .
He's breathing weird,
and he's suddenly
lethargic and. . .
Sometimes
he gets overheated.
No, l mean,
he hasn't moved, period.
And l can't get
through to fucking Vietnam,
and l'm sorry to
have to call you.
l just. . .
l don't know if you know. . .
(BARKlNG)
How long do we wait?
l don't know.
They seem kind of busy.
Should l go ask?
lf you want.
Do you wanna do it?
Oh.
Okay.
They know we're here,
but. . .
Hi.
Do you know
how much longer
for Mahler?
You know,
l think we're just waiting
for a doctor to
get out of the room.
Okay.
She thinks that
they're just waiting
for a doctor to
get out of the room.
Yeah, l could hear her.
Okay.
DOCTOR: l think
it's sciatica.
FLORENCE: Yeah,
he's had that before.
But his eyes are jaundiced,
so l'd like to run some tests
and l will keep him overnight
just to make sure
everything is okay.
And l imagine
you can bring
him home tomorrow.
Thank you.
lt's okay.
PHlLLlP: They gave him
an infusion?
ls it his white blood cells
or his red blood cells?
l'm pretty sure white.
Well, it makes a difference.
Are you taking notes?
l haven't yet, no.
You have to
write this stuff down
if you're not
gonna remember it.
(SlGHS) l'm sorry. l'm almost
positive it's white.
CAROL: Did you ask him
about the dog house?
PHlLLlP: When's he
coming home?
He was supposed
to come home today,
but the numbers dropped
and they wanna keep
him until he's stable.
But they asked
if the gardeners
use rat poison.
They're not supposed to.
Shit! Should we be
getting on a plane?
No. No, he'll be okay.
l mean,
l'll let you know if. . .
Fuck.
Mahler.
CAROL: Has he started
the dog house?
PHlLLlP: l'll call Florence
and get the information.
l'm doing it, okay?
So you can call me.
'Cause l pretty much got it.
Pretty much
isn't very comforting
to Carol and me.
Yeah, well,
he's not my dog, okay?
l'm trying to
take care of it.
Listen, l'm sorry. l. . .
l know when Mom was sick,
l know you said
l needed to come out,
but Mom said l didn't.
Listen, we've done that.
Mom's dead.
l'm not gonna
baby you about it.
l'm talking about right now.
l'm in Vietnam
and my dog is sick.
And you know what?
Carol warned me.
This is so
fucking typical of you.
l'm sorry to get so heated.
l know you're trying.
lt's scary being so far away.
Yeah, well,
you can trust me, okay?
l know.
How...
How are you doing?
Huh, man?
l'm fine.
Fine.
Good.
CAROL: What's going on?
PHlLLlP: Carol wants me to
ask about the dog house,
if that even matters now.
Can the pool overflow?
Yes, the pool can
fucking overflow!
What the fuck's
going on over there?
lt's raining.
"Have a great vacation."
"Thank you.
Take care of my
house and dog."
"Oh, is he dead? Sorry."
You know what?
l asked you a question.
"Can the pool overflow?"
Fuck you!
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
FLORENCE: Hello?
(GUlTAR PLAYlNG)
(SlNGlNG) There's a rugged
road on the prairie
Stretchin' all across
the last frontier
There a stranger strives
solitary
Blessed is the
lonesome pioneer
Roll on, roll on, roll on
Night birds are flyin'
Come on, the light is gone
Hope's slowly dyin'
Tell me how you come
ridin' through
Can l get four beers?
Are you Roger?
Uh-huh.
l'm Gina,
Florence's friend.
Uh-huh.
l've heard
a lot about you.
Do you wanna
come join our table?
No, l think l'll stay here.
Maybe later.
lsn't she beautiful?
She's so ultra-sexy
and hot up there.
What's that look?
You're so quiet.
l'm thinking of
a letter l'm gonna write.
l hear you don't drive.
Uh-huh.
Did you ever drive?
Mmm-hmm.
l grew up here,
l drove then.
l moved to New York
and l stopped.
lt was really
nice meeting you.
Gainin' steady
till this round is won
On the long and lonely road
to kingdom come
People far below
chasin' pleasures
Offer him directions
on the run
Prophets on the path
offer treasures
And though he's mighty hungry
he takes none
Roll on, roll on, roll on
Night birds are flyin'
Come on, the light is gone
Hope's slowly dyin'
(ROCK MUSlC BLARlNG)
People don't call on
my birthday anymore.
l guess l don't call
people on their birthdays,
so why should they call me?
l didn't call you.
When's yours?
November.
That's right.
l'll call you this year.
(MAN LAUGHlNG)
We're taking
her to this side.
Laughing already
demonstrates appreciation,
the applause
seems superfluous.
And also, it's like,
just treat the restaurant
like it's your
living room, guy.
l'm weirdly on tonight.
Should we order?
Maybe l should've
invited Florence.
Or l should've had a party.
Birthdays are hard, man.
lt's weird aging, right?
lt's like, "What the fuck
is going on?"
l know.
Youth is wasted
on the young.
l'd go further.
l'd go,
"Life is wasted on
"people."
Should l invite her?
lt doesn't have
to mean anything.
l don't wanna set up
a series of expectations
with her.
What do you think?
Yeah, if you want.
l guess l could call her.
Okay, then we should
wait to order.
Maybe it'd be good.
Do you care?
No, no.
lt's a different dynamic.
Yeah.
She lives near here.
l'll see if she's around.
She probably has
other plans.
l won't get into it
being my birthday.
She's young.
Thank you.
Thanks.
(GROUP LAUGHlNG)
(CLAPPlNG)
l don't find a lot of
girls in LA attractive.
Do you?
l do, yeah.
l said l don't.
Oh, l do.
She isn't as pretty as Beth,
or her face is,
but she's bigger.
Not fat.
l find it sexy,
but you'll see.
l never found
Beth as beautiful
as everyone else did.
She was my girlfriend.
Years ago.
l didn't think
you'd take offense.
Well, you like
racist Portuguese women.
She made one remark,
and it's a cultural thing.
l mean, by our standards,
Fabula's mother is a bigot.
l know you
never liked Fabula.
Florence is. . .
lf you worked in
an office with her,
you'd definitely
develop a crush on her,
but outside the office,
you'd start to wonder
if she was as cute
as you'd imagined.
l'm just saying,
you know, Fabula is
a lot less possessive
than she used to be.
You'd like her more now.
Can l get another Scotch?
That's the busboy.
Fine, can l get another fork?
This one has some food on it.
Fabula never got you.
She thought she'd bagged
some fancy British guy
rather than just lvan.
l know she helped you
with the addiction
and everything,
but you're over that now.
We have to find you someone.
lt's too bad neither of us
are the type to go whoring.
ls that her?
Hi.
Hi.
This is lvan.
Hello.
lt's nice to meet you.
Hi. Hello.
Hi.
Sorry.
Sorry.
l'll be right back.
GlRL: Hello?
Beth.
What?
Beth?
Who?
ls this a child?
Yes.
ls your mom there?
Who is this?
Roger.
Miller?
Roger.
Mom, it's Miller!
BETH: Hello?
Beth.
Who's this?
Roger.
Oh, hi.
What are you doing?
l'm sewing Charles' pants.
Uh-huh.
ls Charles your son?
Yeah. Hot stuff.
Are you sewing
his Flash suit?
ls he the devil
or the Flash? Did he say?
Yeah.
How's the rest of
your week looking?
What'd you do with her?
She's in the bathroom.
You see what l mean
about working in an office?
Where'd you go?
l called Beth.
Really?
Come on, l mean,
Beth is a part of my life.
She's. . .
l don't believe
that things happen
for a reason, but maybe
me being out here at
this particular time,
it's happening for a reason.
(ALL LAUGHlNG)
l cannot believe
you still have this.
Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
And l got you this.
ROGER: Wow.
"The Magic Marker. Live!"
Man, look at Beller.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
Lenny not so good.
lVAN: You've got a bit of
a mullet going on there.
No, l think
that's a shadow.
You're trying so
hard to look casual.
(SlNGlNG) Happy birthday
to you
No, don't have them
do that. Don't.
Happy birthday to you
Don't.
You're such
a fucking asshole.
Roger, relax.
You know l hate this shit.
Will you stop? No. . .
Okay?
Sit on my dick, asshole!
(GASPlNG)
And many more.
What the fuck, right?
Well, he just got out
of a mental hospital.
Right.
What? Really?
l mean, who does that?
Gets the waiters.
l'm not one of these
preening LA people
who likes everything
to be about them.
l'm not some dickhead
who does karaoke
at the Farmers Market
and hosts
a running charades game
every Friday night,
and swing dances.
(LAUGHS)
What?
You told lvan to
sit on your dick.
Did l?
Yeah.
What the hell
does that mean?
(LAUGHlNG)
l don't know.
Okay.
Now,
happy birthday.
Great.
So, l got the witch.
Thanks.
l made a snap judgment.
lf you'd rather the devil,
you can switch it out.
No, l'm happy
with the witch.
You're right,
these are too
old for your niece.
l'm impressed by you.
ln what way?
l don't know.
l mean, you seem
really fine doing nothing.
lt's like you don't
feel all that bullshit
pressure to be successful.
l mean,
by other people's standards.
l'm. . .
You know,
l almost had a record deal
when l got out of college.
l haven't done nothing.
Cool.
l want to be
doing nothing.
l'm doing
nothing deliberately.
That's what l'm saying.
l don't know that
l could do nothing
and be that cool
with everything.
Well, there's so
much crap out there.
Mahler's not at home.
You could stay over.
Wink-wink.
Um. . .
l'm not supposed to. . .
l try not to. . .
But, fuck it.
Yeah, okay.
lvan's nice.
ls he your best friend?
Yeah, l guess so.
l lost lvan
there for a few years
to this racist
he met in rehab.
But their marriage is ending,
which is good for him,
and me, to be honest.
Good.
You probably
wouldn't believe this,
but in college we
all looked up to him.
He was from England
and he used to be
really handsome and stylish
and kind of great.
l can believe that.
lvan and l
call each other "man,"
but it's meant as a joke.
lt's the kind of thing
we wouldn't say, 'cause. . .
lt's our imitation
of other people.
l know what that's like.
This friend of mine,
Marnie, and me,
we went. . .
We went to this
cheesy bar in Hollywood
and we just thought,
"Let's pretend to
be these slutty girls
who are looking
to get picked up,
"even though we're not."
And we end up
talking to these
two frat guys,
but, like, 30.
And they were all
into their bodies
and cologned,
very well-groomed.
And we ended up going back
to one of their places.
And l think
one of them was, like,
almost retarded,
or else he was really drunk,
because he
didn't make any sense.
And they got out
this video camera
and Marnie and l,
we did this
kind of striptease.
And it was crazy
because we were still
playing these girls,
but there we were,
showing our breasts. . .
And then,
we ran out of
there pretty fast.
We were total freaks.
You never have
anything good to drink.
You know, that's like
the stupidest story
l've ever heard.
lt's just. . .
Bye.
What?
What is
the point of that story?
(DOOR SLAMS SHUT)
FLORENCE: Lots of really
great, interesting people
have tried to
kill themselves.
GlNA: He tried to
kill himself?
l don't think so.
l'm just saying.
Come on,
he's an asshole.
That's a defense.
He's not like us.
He's. . .
You can tell that
a lot of normal stuff
is really hard for him.
Like being nice?
l like him.
Should l call him?
No!
l don't like
how he treats you.
He acts like
you work for him.
Well, l work
for his brother.
l don't wanna be rude.
lf you keep
driving him places,
l'll stop speaking to you.
Okay.
We think it's
an autoimmune disorder.
Uh-huh.
This hospital,
it has more experience
with internal medicine.
l called,
and they're expecting you.
You can't do it here?
l mean, you know him now.
l know,
but he needs to get well.
Thank you.
Come on, Mahler.
l know the doctors there.
You'll be in good hands.
This is where we're going.
l got to pick Victor
up from school
in half an hour.
Can you ask Florence?
l'm trying
not to call her.
l'm just going to
hurt her feelings, man.
l'm trying not to do
that to people anymore.
And l don't want
to be asking anyone
for a ride anymore, ever.
l just turned 41 ,
l should be able to drive.
Why are you yelling at me?
What a pain in the ass.
Come on, come on.
Survival rate
is about 50-50,
but hopefully with
the right cocktail of drugs,
we'll be able to
get it under control
and keep him stable.
ROGER: "Dear
Hollywood Pet Taxi,
"you would think
a vehicle made expressly
"for the transportation
of animals
"would have a soft floor.
"You were given
very high marks
in the Yellow Pages.
"My next letter,
by the way.
"The fact that
the animals you transport
"have no way of
lodging a formal complaint,
"except for a well-deserved
bite of the hand
of the abuser,
"should make you
that much more caring.
"The sick ones,
like Mahler, can only look
pityingly into your eyes
"while you
ignore their pleas.
"l intend to copy the ASPCA.
"Sincerely, Roger Greenberg."
l always felt bad
about that night
after we played
the Viper Room,
and you were there
with your sister,
and l wanted to
go to that party
and you were tired
and l let you go home.
What night was that?
You were with your sister.
Yeah, l don't. . .
l don't remember that night.
l should have been
straight with you 'cause
l originally got into
music to meet girls,
and l think when we
were playing around LA
and l was starting to
get some attention. . .
From girls, yeah.
No, l understand.
Yeah, but l wasn't
clear with you
and l want to apologize
for how l behaved,
'cause l kind
of just let it end,
and left town and
was uncommunicative.
Yeah.
And l feel like
l didn't even
give you a reason. . .
Yeah, but, you know,
l knew.
Well, l'm sorry.
lt's okay.
Like l said, l don't
even remember that night.
You had bought
a new mattress
that afternoon.
(CHUCKLES) Sounds plausible.
l mean, what was it, like,
Yeah,
you didn't like the Sealy,
you thought it was too mushy.
We used to make that
"The extra 'S'
for extra sex."
Okay. Okay.
(ROGER LAUGHlNG)
We could've gotten
married and had kids.
Yeah? Do you think?
l don't think we would've.
Really.
l don't know,
it was a big
relationship for me.
So, you're a carpenter now?
Yeah. l was always
good at making things,
so. . .
Oh, yeah?
Beth,
l made you that bed.
Don't you remember?
lt was why
we were going to buy
the mattress to begin with.
Yes, l do.
l do. l do remember that.
l'm sorry. Totally.
Go on.
l work out of
a studio in Bushwick
that l share with
a few other carpenters
and that's
been pretty good.
lt's political, though.
Um. . .
What else?
Recently,
l had this thing
where l
couldn't move my legs,
literally.
You know,
but it was psychological.
God. . .
Yeah, so that took
some time dealing with.
l think that
brings us up to date.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
l just. . .
l think l need to
just let go, you know?
l had a shrink
there who said,
"You only miss by 5%."
l'm not positive
what it means,
but in most things,
l had a shrink
once who told me,
"You're of value."
lt's stupid,
but it always stayed with me.
You look really pretty.
Thanks.
My dog is sick.
Oh, yeah?
My mom is sick.
Phillip's dog, really,
but l'm taking care of him.
He has
an autoimmune disorder.
Since he got sick,
l keep thinking
l have something.
l'm sorry about your mom.
Yeah.
l'm glad you're
feeling better.
l get horrible
anxiety sometimes, still.
Yeah, that l remember.
Do you want to
have dinner one night?
This week?
Or next.
l kind of meant. . .
Like, on a date.
Oh.
No. (LAUGHS)
l mean, you know,
that's just a terrible idea.
No. l mean, you know, no.
Hello.
Shit, they just. . .
They don't even. . .
She doesn't seem to. . .
She looks harried
even though no one's here.
l'm just going to
go get her.
l'm sure she'll be by.
Hi. Could you send our bill?
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
What is going on? Okay.
Water. Water.
Oh, God.
Hello.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
(lN DEEP VOlCE)
Lenny not so good.
(CHUCKLES)
Not too late to call,
l hope.
No.
Watching Just My Luck
with Lindsay Lohan
on Starz.
Mmm. How is it?
Kind of funny.
She's got charm.
All right.
So, l was thinking
we should maybe
do something together again.
Write some songs.
Aren't you going
back to New York?
Yeah, but...
lf we got something going
l could stay here, possibly.
l don't know if
l've really got time,
you know,
with the computer
work and Victor.
Uh-huh.
lsn't it funny, don't you
still think of yourself
as a guitar player
even though you
don't do it anymore?
No. No. No, l don't.
You know,
l've just hired this guy
called Ezra to help
with the company, so. . .
lt's just, you know,
l've got to
concentrate on that.
Okay.
l think l'm having
a party tomorrow.
Tomorrow?
A pool party. So, come.
Bring Victor.
Pool party? Cool.
After we hang up,
l'm going to
call some people.
Okay, man. Listen,
l'll see you tomorrow.
All right. Bye.
(POP SONG PLAYlNG)
MAN: Do you want to
see a Bigfoot walk?
Very famous footage
of him doing this.
He doesn't wear no shoes.
Bigfoot.
And there's lots of
scientific evidence,
my friend.
Megan's husband
wants to know,
do you know what kind of tree
that skinny one with
the yellow flowers is?
No.
l mean, l wouldn't
even think to know
something like that.
Are you coming out?
Victor wants to
show you his dive.
ls it okay? ls it a dud?
l do this,
l throw a party last minute,
then l'm disappointed
that no one can come.
lt's fine.
We're having fun.
l need to put
together the chips
and guac and
Creamsicles l bought.
l got you iced tea
and lemonade,
but l didn't know
the right proportions,
so you'll have to make it.
l see. Thanks.
l guess l'll
make an appearance.
Are you pulling a Gatsby
and watching the party
from afar?
l don't know that
l need to document
the reasons how this
isn't like a Gatsby.
Marlon and Peggy
are really nice.
l didn't even invite them,
they just come here.
lt turns out they've got
a son who went to the
same school as Victor.
lt's such a small world.
Why is that
news to you?
lt is a small world.
l'm surprised we all
don't run into each
other more often.
You and l went to
school together.
(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG)
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
Hey.
Hey, Rog.
(ANSWERlNG MACHlNE BEEPS)
Hi, this is Florence.
l'm sorry to be calling,
but l wanted to
check and see how...
Hello?
Oh, l wanted to check
and see how Mahler is.
We had to move him
to another vet.
Really?
Yeah, they do better
with internal medicine there.
l was going to
call you, but. . .
ls he okay?
What did they say?
(VACUUM CLEANER WHlRRlNG)
l thought it was sciatica.
Can you. . .
Please.
(WHlRRlNG STOPS)
l'd like to see
him at the hospital,
if you can give
me the information.
We don't have to
see each other.
We can go at different times.
l like the old vet better.
Gina told me it's
nice to leave them
something that
smells like you.
Sometimes l think
he's a human
in a dog costume.
Wait.
(BOTH MOANlNG)
(ROGER PANTlNG)
l don't know any of this.
l don't know Karen Dalton.
Very cool. Thanks.
You sure you don't know it?
No. No.
Thanks. Thank you.
You can tell me
if you know it.
l don't.
Karen Dalton was,
like, this homeless
junkie in the '70s.
You know,
it's a woman with sandals.
Maybe there's something
you can sing on there.
You like old things.
A shrink said to me once,
l have trouble
living in the present,
so l linger on the past
because l felt like
l never really lived it
in the first place, you know?
Do you think
you could love me?
l don't know, Florence.
l just get excited
to see you, and then. . .
l think l get worried
it's gonna go too fast,
so l say things
to get a reaction.
What?
We got to stop this.
Really?
Yeah.
You got to stop calling me.
l've intentionally
not called you.
Even when l needed
to call you, l didn't.
You know, l took a pet taxi.
l haven't called you.
You called me today.
That was for Mahler.
Come on,
it wasn't for Mahler.
Florence,
take some responsibility.
Don't put yourself in
this kind of situation.
What situation?
l like seeing you.
No, you don't.
You don't like it.
Why are we even
having this conversation?
We're not really even dating,
and we're
seeing other people.
l'm not seeing anyone.
Neither am l,
but l want to.
Who?
l don't know! Anyone.
l'm doing nothing.
l'm not tied to anyone.
How many times do we
have to go over it?
Jesus, l. . .
l should be with
a divorced 38-year-old
who has teenage kids
and low expectations
about life.
l don't want to
fucking do this anymore.
God !
(POP SONG PLAYlNG)
Half a pill three
times a day with food.
The blood thinners,
just at night.
They're for the blood clots.
And he'll get prednisone,
which is a steroid,
twice a day for three days,
and then we'll bring him down
to one-and-a-half a day
and the blood
thinners every other day.
Okay?
Hi, little Mahler baby.
Tried lvan,
but he had a birthday party.
l didn't want to cram him
into a shitty pet taxi.
Hi, baby.
Thank you for doing this.
l'm here for Mahler.
Gina says l'm crazy
to drive you anywhere.
Right.
Your credit card.
$3,084?
He seems better.
Give me his pills and
l'll mark them for you,
so you don't forget.
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
(ON ANSWERlNG MACHlNE) Hi,
you've reached the Greenbergs,
please leave a message.
lf you put
the pills in peanut butter,
they go down easier.
(OVER PHONE) Roger,
it's Phillip. Pick up.
Pick up!
Fuck it. l got
a very weird message
from Florence.
She's thinking of quitting.
What the fuck's
going on over there?
Did you do something
that freaked her out?
Do you know
how hard it is to find
an assistant l actually like?
Jesus! l can't
trust you with anyone.
CAROL: How is Mahler?
How is Mahler, by the way?
Did you pick him up today?
Call me.
(WATER RUNNlNG)
Are you cooking?
You wanna make Jell-O?
The vet said
that the steroids
might upset his stomach.
l'll just. . . l'll cook
this and then l'll go.
Gonna make chicken, too?
l can pick up a roast
chicken at the market.
He shouldn't have the skin,
it's too rich.
l can eat the skin.
You wanna have
chicken and rice
with Mahler?
You can walk to Ralphs,
it's three blocks from here.
Okay, will you be
here when l get back?
Oh, my God.
l'll go get the chicken,
but l'm going to call
you when l'm pulling up
and l want you to come out
and l want you to get it
from me.
(HONKlNG HORN)
Thank you.
Listen, l'm sorry about
my freak-out the other night.
You know?
l gotta try to not do that.
l get abusive and
l'm working on that.
So, anyway, l apologize.
Thank you.
l mean, it's not just me.
You do participate
in it, too, though.
l mean, don't you think?
No, then you're not
apologizing, you know.
l'm. . .
This isn't a good day
for me. l'm gonna go.
l'm apologizing
for my side of it.
That's not an apology.
Well, apologizing is hard.
No, it's not.
Not for me.
Well, it is for me.
You know what, Florence?
You know what l think?
l think you're
transferring shit onto me.
l think you're looking
to me for the mental
and physical abuse
of your father,
and sexual molestation,
or whatever.
l was not molested.
Or whatever.
He was withholding.
l'm right about that, right?
l was not molested !
l said "whatever."
AUTOMATED VOlCE: You have
reached the voicemail of Gina.
Gina, call me back
when you get this, okay?
Also, we have to be there
at 7:00 in the morning,
so you should
pick me up at 6:30.
(MUSlC PLAYlNG ON STEREO)
(SlNGlNG ALONG)
Hands across the water
Heads across the sky
Admiral Halsey notified me
He had to have a berth
or he couldn't get to sea
(PHONE RlNGS)
Hey.
Hey.
(SlGHS)
l thought you were Gina.
No, it's me.
Roger.
This one's for me.
What?
l was talking to Mahler.
Why are you calling me?
l wanted to speak to you.
You need some more granola?
(LAUGHlNG)
Or ice-cream sandwiches?
Come on.
I mean, are we
seeing each other or not?
Well, that's what
l wanna talk about.
l don't know, l mean,
l'm leaving in,
like, a week.
Hurt people hurt people.
"Hurt people hurt people"?
Hurt people hurt people.
lt's something
a singing coach of mine
told me.
Shit!
Sorry.
ls somebody there?
No.
l just spilled my champagne.
Forget it.
You never fucked that guy
who plays guitar with you?
No!
l don't want this
to sound dramatic,
and l wasn't
gonna say anything,
and Gina's taking me.
l mean, it's not yours.
lt's. . .
l found out
a couple of days ago.
l don't know,
it's gotta be my ex's,
because l'm six
or seven weeks,
and you and l
have only just. . .
And you used a condom.
(LAUGHS)
l didn't wanna tell you.
l mean, it's weird.
l've been pregnant
this whole time.
Uh-huh.
l made
an appointment for a D&C.
l'm really sensitive to pain,
so l asked for anesthesia.
Sorry,
l'm trying to get drunk now.
l can't eat after 1 0:00.
l'll take you to it.
How's that gonna work?
Am l gonna drive
you to take me?
(ROCK AND ROLL MUSlC BLARlNG)
Can you turn it down?
l'm sorry.
(TURNS MUSlC DOWN)
My head is killing me.
No, it's fine.
Don't worry.
lt's your day, or. . .
You know what l mean.
We'll be here
when you get out.
Okay. Thanks.
ROGER: Don't be nervous.
l just don't know what
l'm doing with my life.
You're of value.
l know that.
You don't have to say that.
We could get
her some flowers.
l thought since she
couldn't eat, she might
be hungry when it's over.
Here.
Well, when you're ready.
Thanks.
Could we go?
They apparently
won't let us go
until you pee.
Oh.
l don't have to.
Maybe when you
get to the bathroom,
you'll feel like it.
l need to lie here
for a little longer.
But you'll probably
be more comfortable
lying at home.
Let her sleep, man.
You like me so much more
than you think you do.
Okay.
Wish it wasn't too late
to get my medical degree.
lt's not too late.
l'd be over 50 by
the time l graduated.
What is it?
Four years, right?
Yeah, but l know myself.
l'd procrastinate,
take time off.
Eight years at best.
Who's gonna hire a 49. . .
Let's just call it 50.
A 50-year-old vet?
l'm confused.
Are you going to vet school
or regular medical school?
(SlGHS)
Neither, clearly.
l have to get back
for Mahler's pills.
lt's a stupid rule.
l mean, what does peeing
have to do with anything?
Fabula makes this
rice dish with pineapples
and raisins.
lt's really delicious.
l think you'll
find lots of girls
who'll be able
to make that dish.
No, no, no. This is
a Brazilian specialty.
Still.
Are you guys
Florence's friends?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay. She's sleeping
and she wants to
stay the night.
Did she pee?
ROGER: You wanna come in,
watch a video?
lVAN: No,
l should get going.
Where?
l think l'll go back to
the motel, take a nap.
Didn't sleep too
well last night.
l'm leaving in,
like, a week.
We'll hang out some more,
don't worry.
You're sure it's okay l left?
She might wake
up and be scared.
She'll be fine.
The nurse seemed nice.
l had to
get back for Mahler.
l understand.
No, l know. l'm not
explaining myself to you.
l'm just saying.
You're just saying, right?
Come on, one drink.
No, l really gotta go.
Okay.
l appreciate your friendship.
Can l ask,
what do people say about me?
Like, negative
things l wouldn't know.
Let me go, man.
Come on,
l'm sure people must trash me
when l'm not around.
They don't trash you.
Okay, what criticisms
do they have?
(SlGHS) l don't know.
l'd say the biggest
criticism they have is that
you have trouble
making fun of yourself.
Really?
That's incredible.
l'm the funniest person
l know.
Well, not about yourself.
Really?
That's what people say.
l wouldn't get too
worried about it.
These things
aren't difficult to fix.
Right.
People say they think
you lie about things
you don't need to lie about,
that you don't
make any effort,
that you're
a bit of a prince.
Who says?
Who are these people?
That's just totally insane.
l'm just telling
you what l've heard.
lf anything
l'd say l'm too honest,
don't you think?
Yeah.
l mean,
l'm pretty upfront with. . .
No effort?
Mmm-hmm.
l'm making
my brother's family
a doghouse.
You know,
l brought my tool
kit out from New York.
They had to check my
bag because of that.
l always do carry-on.
l have calluses.
Does Beller say this?
l think Beller said it, yeah.
And others, too.
Johno, maybe once, and Anna.
That's funny.
Yeah.
Completely wrong,
but funny.
All right.
(GlRL LAUGHlNG)
(GlRLS CHATTERlNG)
Hello?
ROGER: Sara?
There's the strange man
who's been
sleeping in my room.
Oh, this is Muriel.
Hey.
l heard you killed our dog.
No. No, no,
he's all better.
We brought him
back yesterday.
Well, where is he?
Mahler!
Mahler? Mahler!
We leave for Australia
tomorrow morning.
lsn't that like
a 20-hour flight?
No, it's 1 4.
So that's,
like, seven movies.
Yeah.
lVAN: Hello?
Party of 20-year-olds
has suddenly happened
at my house.
Hey, man.
How was your nap?
Yeah, it was fine.
Where are you?
l'm having dinner
with my family.
Your parents?
No.
My other family.
Fabula.
Mmm-hmm.
Do you want me to
come over there?
No! lt's okay.
Just don't do anything.
l'm not sure
l know what you mean.
You should come here after.
l really gotta go.
Okay. Call you later.
(HlP HOP MUSlC
PLAYlNG ON STEREO)
Hey! He just got
out of the hospital.
l'm sorry.
You know,
don't give him beer.
l'm so sorry.
He's got
an autoimmune disorder,
all right? Mahler.
l didn't know.
ROGER: Mahler.
Mahler.
(lNDlSTlNCT CHATTERlNG)
Hey, man,
you got a cool place.
Oh, thanks.
lt's not totally mine,
but. . .
Yeah, what do you do?
Oh, l'm kind of doing
nothing for a while.
ROGER: ls that coke?
Yup.
l'd heard coke was in again.
Yeah, you want some?
Um. . .
l'm Rich.
Roger Greenberg.
ls it okay to mix
coke and Zoloft?
Yeah, totally.
l haven't done this in,
like, 1 5 years.
Since college, or since
a couple of years out.
lt's very unlike me.
l actually hate coke.
l hate it politically
and l hate how
it makes me feel.
But when it's done,
l may have to
kill one of you out
of sheer frustration.
l'm gonna change the record.
We need better coke music.
Oh, yeah.
Put on some Korn.
l got the perfect thing.
lVAN: Hello?
Hey, man.
Hey, man.
l just did a line.
l think the last time
l did coke was with you.
lt was just a line,
but l feel really wired.
l guess my tolerance is less.
Okay.
Hey, you done with dinner?
No, we're still eating.
GlRL: Put on AC/DC!
You sure you
don't want me there?
Yeah.
l've gotta go, man.
l almost feel like l can
get in a car and drive.
(ElGHTlES POP PLAYlNG)
Don't do that.
You gotta come
here when you're done.
JERRY: Oh, dude! Come on !
Fuck off, Jerry!
Tonight's not good, man.
Man, you gotta come!
l can't believe
you lied to me
about your dinner.
GlRL: Put on AC/DC!
lt's actually
a pretty fun party.
Man, I can't!
All right. l got to go.
GlRL: We wanna
hear AC/DC!
Don't, okay?
Come on ! Duran Duran's
great coke music.
Give it a chance.
Let's maybe not
keep saying coke
in every sentence.
l read an article.
Aren't you guys all just
fucking on the lnternet?
BOY: Not all of us.
But some?
l guess some.
Yeah,
l think Paige has a site,
but it's more art than porn.
They shot a skin
flick on my campus,
a couple guys
and some townies,
and they acted in it.
Sick.
Hey, can't we put on
some Korn?
No, we can't put on
fucking Korn. Jesus!
You guys smoke crack
at all?
GlRL: l don't.
l have, once or twice.
l might get back into drugs.
l've got a Vicodin,
if you want.
l could use that, actually.
You want
a neck massage?
Uh. . .
Okay. Normally,
l'd say no because
l'm a little OCD, but. . .
Okay.
That's great.
Are you kids really
different from me?
l mean,
do the movies,
and the iPods,
and the facility
with MySpace pages
make you guys
really different?
l don't know.
Every article l read
seems to be saying that.
Definitely feel it.
Good coke.
(ALL LAUGHlNG)
What?
Nothing.
You're funny.
You're mean.
The thing about you kids
is you're all
kind of insensitive.
l'm glad l grew
up when l did,
'cause your parents
were too perfect
at parenting.
All that Baby Mozart
and Dan Zanes songs.
You're so sincere and
interested in things.
There's a confidence
in you guys
that's horrifying.
You're all ADD
and carpal tunnel.
You wouldn't know agoraphobia
if it bit you in the ass,
and it makes you mean.
You say things to
someone like me,
who's older and smarter,
with this blithe air.
l'm freaked out
by you kids.
(ALL LAUGHlNG)
l hope l die before
l end up meeting one of you
in a job interview.
Fuck or fight?
What?
Fuck or fight?
What are you
fighting against?
What do you got?
Uh. . . l don't
have much.
Ah-ha! Then that's what
l'm fighting against,
not much.
Boom !
(HEAVY METAL MUSlC PLAYlNG)
What the fuck?
Rich, you asshole.
l didn't do anything, man.
Oh. Sorry.
Hey, get off the stereo.
l was listening to that.
Where's the Duran Duran?
"Where's the Duran Duran?"
Hey, careful, those
are my brother's records.
"Those are my
brother's records."
Fuck off.
(SCREAMS) Jesus!
There's something
in the pool !
Hey, don't feed him.
No, don't feed him !
Mahler, drop it!
Mahler, drop it.
Mahler, drop it.
Drop it. Drop it.
GlRL: Ow!
God, what is it?
l think it's
a bird or an opossum,
or something.
lt's a. . .
l think we've had
one of these before.
(SCREAMS)
Holy shit!
(ALL SCREAMlNG)
(LAUGHlNG)
All right.
lt's coming to get your ass!
l'm sorry your dog
has AlDS.
He doesn't have AlDS.
lt's an autoimmune disorder.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
Hey, man.
Hey, you okay, man?
ls that pot?
Where did you get that?
You want a puff?
No, man, l quit.
You know that.
Okay, man. Okay.
lsn't this weird?
So, how'd it go?
Fine.
And?
l think
we're gonna have another try.
You're shitting me.
Please don't make
this hard for me.
Oh, God, man.
Don't give in.
l know it's the harder,
more painful decision
to stay free,
but that's what
adulthood is.
l mean, l could
just stay with Florence
because it's easy,
but l don't want easy.
You've been dating
Florence for a month.
l've been married for
Don't tell me
about adulthood.
We're not dating, exactly.
That's my point!
Hey, you're
shouting at me.
lt's been a really
hard time for me, Roger.
l mean, l miss my family.
l feel like
all the hard work
l've done over the years,
kicking the drugs,
being a dad,
l feel like it's all
slipping away from me.
lt's not going away.
lt's transforming.
You're going through
something, which means. . .
l don't think you
understand what it's been
like for me out here,
how the life l'd hoped for. . .
lt's huge to
finally embrace the life
you never planned on.
l wanted to make
that record.
We never would've
survived at a major label
with those restrictions.
How the fuck do you know?
Because that's not
how the world works.
What could you possibly know
about how the world works?
Listen, man,
l think you're playing out
some old family
dynamic here. . .
Apropos of what we
were saying before
about what
people say about us?
People feel you hold on
to petty resentments.
You asked me what
people say about you.
l don't want to know.
Yeah, well,
you should know.
People think you
play the victim.
And l don't mean
this in a bad way,
but you let people
feel sorry for you
when you're
really just protecting
your own narcissism.
l don't want to know!
Well, that's why l didn't
want to be in a fucking
band with you !
Because you won't
acknowledge your own shit.
And you were
fucked up all the time!
What do you want
me to say, huh?
What do you want me to say?
l had no idea that
would be our only offer.
l didn't think that
l had the power to blow it.
l thought that we were all
just giving our two cents.
Fuck, l didn't know
l was gonna be
the one to make
the band fall apart.
You know, maybe,
obviously, l would
do it differently now!
Of course l know what
it's like to live a life
l didn't plan on.
What the fuck do
you think l'm doing
right now?
Florence told me
you were in the hospital.
l'd know,
l understand
about those things.
You know,
we could've talked about it,
maybe made each
other feel better,
but instead we never talk
about anything good.
This is a small thing,
and it's probably
boring for you,
but it would've been nice
if you'd have made
an effort to know Vic.
Who's Vic?
My son.
Oh, Victor. l didn't
recognize the diminutive.
(ON ANSWERlNG MACHlNE)
Hi, it's Florence.
Leave a message.
Florence.
Florence, l'm calling
to say l'm sorry
you had to go through
what you're going through.
And Mahler's fine.
He ate pizza.
l'm leaving this
in your voicemail,
but it's really a letter.
l get so angry about
the world, you know?
lf l knew who
to write a letter to
about all the stupidity
in the world, l'd do it.
You're 25.
l was just 27.
You're brave.
Young people are brave.
When l was a kid,
l was a leader
and most of the kids
always looked up to me.
l thought l might go
into space, you know,
as an astronaut.
(CHUCKLES) l can't even
swim in the fucking pool.
My brother's in Vietnam.
We have the same parents.
l can't blame that.
l really love Phillip,
but l'm not supposed
to be on his bed.
l love my parents.
l love Mahler.
l miss my mom.
l really like you.
l just hate how
embarrassing it all is.
l don't understand.
What happened to me?
Where does experience go?
Remember Charlie Sheen
standing on his balcony
in Wall Street?
Did you see that movie?
Saying, "Who am l?"
Phillip and l used to
make so much fun of it.
l'm thinking, now,
it wasn't so stupid.
Somebody once said to me,
"Hurt people hurt people."
lt's kind of trite,
but it stayed with me.
Oh, man ! That was you,
like, a few days ago.
l used to have
a really good memory, too.
Anyway, we do. . .
l do hurt people.
Hurt people.
l think lvan and l broke up.
Florence, l really like you.
Love, Roger.
(GlRLS CHATTERlNG)
Assholes.
(GlRL LAUGHlNG)
Dicks.
MURlEL: l don't understand
why she did it.
SARA: Good morning, sunshine.
Holy shit!
How you feeling, Sunny?
What's "Sunny"?
We decided that's
our name for you.
l think l'm still drunk.
Hey, they printed my
letter about Pakistan.
SARA: Cool.
"Roger Greenberg.
Hollywood, California."
SARA: l mean,
l've got no problem
giving some guy a blowjob,
but she has taken
it to the extreme.
MURlEL: Why do
guys like to do that?
Come on you and spread it?
They don't all like it.
(LAUGHS) They do.
No, they don't.
You just like guys
who do that.
(LAUGHS) Fuck you !
You're really good with him.
You have dogs?
No, Florence showed me
how to do it.
Did you start an affair
with Phillip's assistant?
No.
l'm jealous. (CHUCKLES)
You should come to
Australia with us.
Yeah?
There's a great Kinks song
called Australia.
Totally.
You should totally come.
Maybe l will.
Okay.
But you better hurry.
We gotta leave in,
like, five minutes.
SARA: Fuck!
What are we gonna
do about Mahler?
Oh, fuck.
Can l ask you guys a favor?
Yeah. What's happening?
How you doing?
l'm Roger, by the way.
Marlon and Peggy.
Sorry it's such a mess.
Yeah,
we're gonna go home.
Can you take Mahler
until Wednesday?
Uh. . .
Yeah, sure.
We love Mahler.
Come here, baby.
ROGER: Great.
No, wait a second.
You know,
run it by his nose.
Okay.
No sweat.
Thanks, man.
And he takes prednisone,
which is a steroid,
twice a day for
the next three days.
l'll write this out.
Also,
there's an antibiotic
and a blood thinner,
but l'll write
it down for you.
Let's go! We still
have to get you a ticket.
ROGER: What time is it?
Come on !
lt's fucking peaceful,
is what it is.
SARA: l love it.
Did you see sharks last time?
Oh, fuck!
SARA: Okay.
You know what
really pisses me off,
is fucking Lily.
Once again.
l still can't get over that.
What a slut.
Like, l'm thinking
about it now,
and it's so much worse
than l remembered.
Now that l feel like,
maybe l was drunk
at the time.
l've seen a great white,
and there are
the most amazing wrecks.
l literally cannot wait.
l love that
you're doing this.
ls this completely crazy?
SARA: No!
l mean, it's what
people do, right?
You'll love Australia.
For some people,
this is nothing.
MURlEL: And who knows
how much longer the Reef's
gonna be around?
There's this starfish
that's killing
the marine life.
Roger, are you certified?
To what?
Dive.
No, l don't really swim.
(BOTH LAUGHlNG)
(COUGHlNG)
MURlEL: You can go look at
whales while we dive.
Sunny will look at whales.
Okay, you know what?
You can cut out
the Sunny business.
(MURlEL COUGHlNG)
SARA: Oh, my God,
look at this guy in these
overalls and the clogs.
l left my ChapStick.
Oh, my God.
Are overalls back in now,
or is he crazy?
No, l saw a bunch of
people in overalls. . .
MURlEL: Hey,
will you check this out?
SARA: What the fuck
is that?
That is so weird.
l know, right? lt's so itchy.
Don't touch it.
Don't touch it.
You know what?
l'm supposed to get
someone from the hospital.
No, no, no.
Hold it. Hey! Hey, hold it!
Can you open my door?
No, you're our prisoner.
Exactly.
Come on, open
the fucking door, please.
Okay, fine.
Come on.
Roger, it's a rental.
Open it.
Would you stop?
Sara, open the fucking door!
l'm trying.
Stop pulling on it!
You know, l can't go,
l can't afford it
(STAMMERlNG) and l have to
pick up my friend.
Have a good time,
all right?
MURlEL: Bye!
l've got to get insurance.
The anesthesia's
so expensive.
l'm such a baby
about pain.
And l stayed overnight.
l'm glad your brother's
coming back next week.
l need to work more hours.
Thanks.
l really picked
my lip in my sleep,
which was possibly
about finding a pet
in the Canyons.
Do you, uh,
get The New York Times?
No.
lt's good to get the paper.
l'll pick you up one.
Okay.
Did you get my message?
l haven't checked yet.
What did you say?
Um. . .
l reassessed
the movie Wall Street,
among other things.
l don't know it.
l wasn't gonna give it to you
'cause l was pissed,
but you can open it.
Happy birthday, again.
Thanks.
Now you have the set.
Not that they're a set.
What about your niece?
Remember,
the sticks are too old.
She's coming
over this weekend.
l framed her picture.
Do you have
a tape-measure?
l think there's a ruler
in the desk drawer.
Do you have a hammer?
Maybe in there.
Here?
You want it on
this wall, here?
Okay.
Cool.
Like a professional.
Well, l am a professional.
l mean, l build things.
l know you know
l was in a hospital.
l'm not hiding it.
But it's not what
defines me, you know?
l understand.
(HAMMERlNG)
l want to
listen to my message.
l'd had some to drink.
Gina.
My mom.
Okay. This is you.
(POP MUSlC PLAYlNG)
(ROCK MUSlC PLAYlNG)
(TURN SlGNAL CLlCKlNG)
Are you going to
let me in?
Thank you.
Shoot, l left the ticket
in the car, l think.
lt's okay.
lt's under
"Phillip Greenberg."
lt's just one?
(STAMMERlNG)
lt's two shirts
and a pair of pants.
Do you mind if
it is all ones?
No problem.
Okay, sorry.
KlDS: Florence.
Hi, guys.
Let me put
this stuff down.
Hi, Mahler.
Florence!
We're going on vacation !
l know.
We're going to Vietnam.
l know.
But we will come back, right?
We're not going
to live there?
No, that's why
it's a vacation.
Are you going
to go with us?
No, remember?
l have to stay here.
Why?
Because l do.
Why?
Because the vacation
is for family members only,
so Mahler and l
have to stay in LA.
Mahler isn't coming?
l want Mahler to come.
Did you get
the neck pillow?
Yes. They didn't have
those chocolate-covered
rice balls.
Did you try Trader Joe's?
Yeah, and Bristol Farms.
Were you able to find
the liquid decongestant?
Shoot! Sorry. l'm sorry.
lt's okay, Florence.
Don't worry about it.
lt's fine.
No, no, no.
And can you tell the gardener
to check the sensor
on the sprinklers?
l'll tell Carlos.
There's a package
l need you to mail
to my father.
CAROL: What else?
PHlLLlP: l don't need
this many T-shirts.
CAROL: Did you tell her
about your brother?
My brother will
be staying here.
He might call
you with things,
questions or
an errand or two.
That's not a problem.
He's coming in
from New York.
He just got out
of the hospital.
ls he sick?
Not that kind of hospital.
He had a nervous breakdown.
Carol, come on.
lt's relevant.
He's fine.
Don't pack this skirt.
He really is fine now.
l mean,
he's delicate,
but. . .
We're hiring him to do
some work around the house.
He's a carpenter.
He's gonna make
Mahler a dog house.
He says he's going to.
That'll look nice.
We hope.
Have a great trip,
you guys.
Okay.
And l'll call you if
there's anything else,
which l'm sure there is.
lt's no problem.
l want you
to come with us.
And you'll confirm
the car service and
flight info for tonight?
Yes, and l'll put
the cars in the garage.
Okay, and we can
call or e-mail.
l'm sure there's
e-mail in Vietnam.
l think there's
e-mail everywhere.
l forgot to
write you a check.
What do we owe you now?
Don't worry about it.
lt's three weeks. . .
Oh, Florence,
you have to speak up.
l'm out of checks.
l want Mahler to come.
l know, l know,
but it's fine.
l'll give you
cash in the meantime.
No, no. Don't worry
about it. lt's really. . .
lt's better this way.
Because then l don't
spend it all at once.
Are you sure?
l'll leave it for you
in the kitchen drawer
before we go.
l'll let my brother know.
Okay.
Okay.
Bye.
Okay.
l'll see you soon.
lt's okay.
Let's say goodbye.
Bye.
Bye, Florence.
Bye.
(OVER PHONE)
Florence, itis Gina.
l'm here. lt's packed.
Don't park on Alvarado,
park on Montana.
Don't wander away.
Okay.
Let's make a point
of sticking together.
Okay.
Can l borrow 40
bucks until tomorrow?
Yeah.
(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG)
(lNAUDlBLE)
(LAUGHlNG)
l was thinking
this morning that l've been
out of college now
for as long as l was in,
and nobody cares if l
get up in the morning.
Florence,
it's time to go home now.
l'm gonna stay.
l don't know. . .
l just got out of
a long relationship.
This isn't a relationship.
Right, l know.
Okay.
(TURN SlGNAL CLlCKlNG)
Are you going to
let me in?
No. Okay.
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
Hello?
Hi, this is
Roger Greenberg.
l'm Phillip's brother.
Oh, hey.
ls this Florence?
Sorry.
l'm quitting e-mail.
Okay. Hi.
There are people in the pool.
That's Marlon and Peggy.
Okay.
Your brother and Carol
let Marlon and Peggy
use the pool.
Mmm-hmm.
There's more than two.
They don't come in the house.
Okay, thanks.
Your brother
left a check for me.
ls it okay if l come by?
Yeah, l'll be here.
(PEOPLE LAUGHlNG OUTSlDE)
ROGER: "Dear
American Airlines,
"l'm not much in
the habit of writing
letters of complaint.
"l think l could
have lived, and did,
"with the distance
between your rows.
"But my issue is not
with the lack of leg room,
"it is instead
with the quality of the
buttons on the seats.
"When l depress
my recliner button,
"l expect the chair
to recline.
"At the very least,
to move.
"This was not the case
with Seat 26C on
Flight 41 from JFK..."
(DOOR OPENlNG)
Hi, little Mahler baby.
Hi, l'm Florence.
l hope that this
isn't a bad time.
My check.
No, l guess it's fine.
Okay.
Do you want a treat?
Come here. Come here.
(LAUGHlNG)
His tongue's so scratchy.
Good dog.
(SONG STARTS PLAYlNG)
Remember how they used
to play this on the radio
every time it rained?
l'm not sure.
And if there was a fire,
they'd play Burn Baby Burn.
Or, what was it called?
Disco lnferno.
l don't think l know it.
lt's funny.
Before your time,
l guess.
You have to see
past the kitsch.
l can see past it.
Cool.
Phillip said if
you need anything,
l can go pick you up
groceries or things.
l'm okay.
You sure?
lt's not a problem.
Well, l guess l
could use some things.
Sure.
Make a list.
l'll be right back.
(FLORENCE URlNATlNG)
(TOlLET FLUSHlNG)
l'm gonna take
him on a W-A-L-K.
Oh, no. No, l got it.
Okay, cool.
Bye.
(DlALlNG)
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
(ON ANSWERlNG MACHlNE)
This is lvan. Leave a message
after the tone.
lvan, it's Greenberg.
How you doing, man?
ROGER: l'm in LA.
l'm here, actually.
ln from New York City.
So, give me a call.
l'm staying at my
brother's house.
He's in Vietnam.
l think he's
opening a hotel there
or something.
Give me a call, man.
lt'd be great to see you.
(AlRPLANE PASSlNG)
"Dear Mayor Bloomberg,
"l write as
a concerned citizen
that has finally had enough
"of the abominable
traffic noise that has
engulfed the city.
"lf you placed
a police officer
"at strategically
chosen corners of Manhattan,
"it would result in
the needed employment
of crime fighters,
"less crime and trafficking,
and a lower contingent
of horn-honkers.
"lf you're into green. . ."
And who isn't?
". . .it'll make for
a significant reduction
in noise pollution.
"lf they can do it in LA,
a car culture if
ever there was one,
"l'm confident we can do it
here in Manhattan."
lt's true.
No one really honks here.
Yeah. ln LA,
they understand the horn
is for emergencies only.
ln New York,
it's a constant.
Yeah.
l don't know.
l don't really recognize
New York anymore, you know?
"You might be
interested to know
"that in the relatively
recently acquired
state of Hawaii,
"there's a law on the books
that prohibits the honking
of horns entirely.
"Yours in hopes
of green sound,
Roger Greenberg."
When did you get in?
Only Monday.
You're the first
person l called.
No, l didn't mean. . .
No, l know.
l was just saying.
Right.
How long you staying for?
About six weeks.
Can you imagine
going to Vietnam?
What, to fight?
Well, to fight, too,
but l just meant now.
My brother and his wife
are there on vacation.
l don't know.
Some people like to travel.
That's my brother's
wife's daughter, Sara.
My step-sister?
Niece.
She's at UC Santa Cruz.
Uh, no, thanks, man.
l don't really
drink anymore.
Okay.
Yeah, it's for the best.
l've got into
these Arnold Palmers.
lced tea, lemonade.
Yeah, l don't have that.
l thought l'd told you.
l guess l think we
talk more than we do.
The beard is cool.
Yeah.
You know,
it's a winter beard.
l probably shouldn't
be on the table here.
Maybe don't sit
on the speaker.
Oh, sorry.
So, what do you
want to do today?
Um, Beller's having
a barbeque, which means,
you know. . .
Oh, what's he up to?
He directs television.
He calls me up with
computer questions.
What a dick.
He always offers to pay.
Yeah, still rude.
Let's not do that.
Uh. . .
What else, man?
We could get
a drink at a bar,
we could stay here.
They have videos.
Yeah.
l think l saw Mannequin.
And, uh, Gung Ho?
l remember that
being funny.
Gung Ho's good.
Yeah.
lt'd be interesting
to watch it now.
ln the day?
l meant now,
like, you know. . .
Oh, these days. Yeah.
Now,
as opposed to
when it was made.
Yeah, sorry.
l'm not sure
about these pants.
They look flarey to you?
No, l think
that's the style.
(SlGHS) l feel like
l should have
worn jeans.
No one's going
to be dressed up
at this thing.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Fabula and l are on
this trial separation.
Oh. Uh-huh.
lt's a lot to go into.
l feel terrible
for Victor, you know.
l'd love you to meet him.
He's like
a little person now.
Yeah, l saw him
a few years ago.
Yeah, but now he's eight.
He's like a friend.
He's fun to hang out with.
l'm glad you're here, man.
lt's good for me to
get out like this.
Want to put your blinker on?
IVAN: Casa de Beller.
Keep going. Keep going.
Keep going.
What a fucking nightmare.
Maybe we can park here.
No, no, no. Let's go home.
l shouldn't have let
you talk me into this.
lt's a nightmare here.
lt's this kind of shit. . .
l can't find a movie
l want to go to
in the fucking multiplex,
or when l'm in Starbucks,
l hear music l actually like.
But we drove all
the way out here.
Let's have one drink.
(ROGER SlGHS)
(POP MUSlC PLAYlNG)
ls this a fucking
children's party?
Beller, how are you?
l'm good.
Hey, man.
Johno.
Hey, Greenberg,
what are you doing out here?
You know. . .
Hey, Beth.
Oh, my God. Hey.
Should l know?
Are you really
big or something?
No, Megan.
l didn't know
you were out here.
l wasn't.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, dude, or what about
Your Grandma's Pussy?
lt's like Anaconda,
with seven cards down.
l'm fair to middling.
You know.
Leonard Maltin would give me
two-and-a-half stars.
l haven't seen you since,
probably, like 1 0 years ago.
ln his movie guide.
Yeah, l think it was
actually Matt Levy's wedding.
l'm all shits
and giggles today.
Yeah. l think you'll find
l'm pretty much all shits.
lt's sad about Matt Levy.
Yeah.
Wait, what happened?
Oh, you didn't hear.
He died.
(EXHALES)
JOHNO: Texas Hold 'em is dead.
BELLER: lt's dead.
You know,
that shit just
makes your lips drier.
l know.
There's Beth.
BELLER: She and Steven
are getting a divorce.
JOHNO: They were
a cool couple.
Are any of those yours?
Yes, mine are the one
in the bumblebee costume
and the one in
the devil costume.
l think that's The Flash.
All the men out here
dress like children,
and the kids dress
like superheroes.
Hi, Dad.
Hey, sweet pea.
Come to think of it,
Steven's kind of a less
Jewish-looking version of you.
Less? l'm not even. . .
l'm only half.
Yeah,
but you're doing this.
What's. . .
l'm thinking small.
ls this a Jewish gesture?
l don't know.
Beller,
always with the self-hatred.
You're sweating.
l am. Yeah.
Have you been to
one of Eric's seders?
Eric gave trees to lsrael.
Am l not allowed
to joke about it?
No, l know. l'm just
saying, since you said
"less Jewish-looking,"
because most people
think l look ltalian.
And since my mom was
actually Protestant,
l'm not actually
Jewish at all, so. . .
Good to see you.
What are you
doing these days?
You're in New York, right?
Yeah.
Making music?
Haven't played
music in years.
l'm a carpenter,
you know, for money.
But right now,
l'm really trying
to do nothing for a while.
That's brave at our age.
l'm here for a few weeks
at my brother's,
and wanna have
a drink or something?
Um. . .
Sure. Okay.
ROGER: "Dear Starbucks,
"in your attempt to
manufacture culture
out of fast-food coffee,
"you've been
surprisingly successful,
for the most part.
"The part that
isn't covered by
'the most part' sucks."
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
FLORENCE: Hello?
Florence, hey,
it's Roger Greenberg.
Hi.
Sorry, l'm eating.
That's okay.
You wanna have
a drink or something?
Um...
Sure. Okay.
Um. . .
ls there a bar you
know we can go to?
There's one
near my apartment,
but it's pretty lame.
Okay.
lt's in Culver City.
Do you want to
meet me there?
l don't drive.
Those are all
kind of cheesy.
You have the light.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. . .
Do you mind if we
stop by my house?
l left my purse. Sorry.
Do you need it?
l still get carded.
l don't read enough.
l'm such a bad reader.
ls that you?
Yeah, it's one
of the rare times
l was actually
happy around my dad.
Did you do that?
No, that's my niece.
lt's good.
She's four.
l want to have
a relationship with her,
she's just not
that friendly with me.
You want to see?
l got her these
puppets for her birthday.
They might be too old.
They have sticks.
Yeah. l'm sure
they'll be fine.
What do you have to drink?
Um. . .
Oh.
Okay, you don't
want to go to the bar?
lt's Friday.
The bars are probably
full of bridge
and tunnel people.
Or whatever the LA version
of bridge and tunnel is.
Sorry.
l don't really have. . .
There's a Corona Light
and some cheap tequila
someone left here once.
Shall we split
the Corona?
Okay.
(HlCCUPS)
l get the hiccups
when l first
drink carbonation.
Don't worry about it.
l'm wearing kind
of an ugly bra.
lt's like an ACE bandage.
There's no clasp.
Do you hear a train?
ls that a train?
l get kind of nerdy.
Don't worry about it.
Can we take it slow?
l'm sorry,
it's just that. . .
l just got out of
a long relationship,
and l don't want to
go from just having sex
to just having sex
to just having sex.
Who's the third
"just having sex"?
You, if we had sex.
Okay,
then who's the second?
A guy l met at
this gallery thing.
You slept with him?
Yeah, l did.
How did that go?
What do you mean?
The sex?
Yeah. Well. . .
lt was pretty awkward.
What is that
on your lip?
What?
ls that a. . .
Nothing.
No, it's not a cold sore.
You sure?
Yeah, l picked it.
Where's your bathroom?
This is so annoying,
but l have to call
my friend, Gina, back.
Sorry, it's just,
if l don't call her back,
then l'll be a bad friend.
She's always
got an emergency.
l'm sure it's nothing.
Uh, how far do you think
it would be to walk?
To your brother's?
Way too long,
like five miles.
You can stay here.
l have the dog and. . .
l can drive you.
This will only take a second.
You have to call
her right this moment?
Won't she understand
you're in the middle of a. . .
No, no.
l'll take you now. Sorry.
You know, l. . .
You don't have to do that.
You've got your robe. . .
Oh, no.
lt's not a problem.
l can probably call a cab.
Okay.
This is stupid.
l'm singing this Saturday
at this place on
Orange and Sunset.
l mean, if you feel like it.
l know it's last minute.
Oh, my friend Gina
made the flyers
and she wrote down
the address wrong.
l don't think. . .
What time?
Like 1 1 :30.
There's a lot of acts,
so it's kind of
hard to pinpoint.
Don't feel obligated.
We probably shouldn't
do this again.
l mean,
you work for my brother.
Yeah.
And l'm really trying to
do nothing right now.
That's cool.
And l've got to
stop doing things
just 'cause they feel good.
GlNA: A mental patient
just went down on you.
Why do you
say it like that?
He's not crazy.
Mmm-hmm.
A lot of people go
to insane asylums.
A lot of people
are in therapy,
they're not in
insane asylums.
He's also 40.
Jesus.
He seems vulnerable.
(WATER SPLASHlNG)
MAN: l'm awake now.
(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG OUTSlDE)
WOMAN 1 : That could happen.
WOMAN 2: What?
MAN: lt'd have to be
a super high-end
fucking garbage disposal.
You can't hold any
revelations l had
during a shamanic
ceremony against me.
(LAUGHS) There.
You're judging me.
That guy's there.
Oh, hey, what's up, man?
WOMAN: Hey.
Why am l still pissed off?
We were 25.
We finally got a break,
and you had to fuck it up.
l didn't like the deal.
lt was completely standard.
lt was a record deal,
Roger, okay?
lt was a very big
thing for us and
we were not gonna get
any better than that.
lt was corporate bullshit.
l didn't want
to be a slave to the
A and R department.
They'd fuck with the songs.
We had no control.
You were not the only person
in the band, Roger.
Do you understand that?
lt's morally reprehensible
what you did.
l'm sorry,
but l didn't want to do it
unless it was on our terms.
Well, you got your way,
you know.
There's no record.
There's no band.
There's your terms. Awesome.
Beller,
it was 1 5 years ago.
You're rich.
What do you care?
You've done all right.
lt doesn't matter.
No, it does matter.
You're not the person
who l thought you were.
What about lvan?
He's fixing computers now.
This could have
changed his life.
lvan was counting on it.
He co-wrote those
songs with you, man.
lvan wrote some of
the music with me.
Stop rationalizing.
lvan can take
care of himself.
l'm surprised
he still speaks to you.
You know,
why am l even here?
You're never gonna change.
(SlGHS)
What's that?
What's that sigh?
Nothing.
What are you doing?
Asshole.
(TlRES SQUEAL)
(HAMMERlNG)
Hey.
Go get it.
(ENGAGED TONE)
What the fuck?
(SlGHS)
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
FLORENCE: Hello?
Florence,
it's Roger Greenberg.
Hey.
Um. . .
Mahler's. . .
He's breathing weird,
and he's suddenly
lethargic and. . .
Sometimes
he gets overheated.
No, l mean,
he hasn't moved, period.
And l can't get
through to fucking Vietnam,
and l'm sorry to
have to call you.
l just. . .
l don't know if you know. . .
(BARKlNG)
How long do we wait?
l don't know.
They seem kind of busy.
Should l go ask?
lf you want.
Do you wanna do it?
Oh.
Okay.
They know we're here,
but. . .
Hi.
Do you know
how much longer
for Mahler?
You know,
l think we're just waiting
for a doctor to
get out of the room.
Okay.
She thinks that
they're just waiting
for a doctor to
get out of the room.
Yeah, l could hear her.
Okay.
DOCTOR: l think
it's sciatica.
FLORENCE: Yeah,
he's had that before.
But his eyes are jaundiced,
so l'd like to run some tests
and l will keep him overnight
just to make sure
everything is okay.
And l imagine
you can bring
him home tomorrow.
Thank you.
lt's okay.
PHlLLlP: They gave him
an infusion?
ls it his white blood cells
or his red blood cells?
l'm pretty sure white.
Well, it makes a difference.
Are you taking notes?
l haven't yet, no.
You have to
write this stuff down
if you're not
gonna remember it.
(SlGHS) l'm sorry. l'm almost
positive it's white.
CAROL: Did you ask him
about the dog house?
PHlLLlP: When's he
coming home?
He was supposed
to come home today,
but the numbers dropped
and they wanna keep
him until he's stable.
But they asked
if the gardeners
use rat poison.
They're not supposed to.
Shit! Should we be
getting on a plane?
No. No, he'll be okay.
l mean,
l'll let you know if. . .
Fuck.
Mahler.
CAROL: Has he started
the dog house?
PHlLLlP: l'll call Florence
and get the information.
l'm doing it, okay?
So you can call me.
'Cause l pretty much got it.
Pretty much
isn't very comforting
to Carol and me.
Yeah, well,
he's not my dog, okay?
l'm trying to
take care of it.
Listen, l'm sorry. l. . .
l know when Mom was sick,
l know you said
l needed to come out,
but Mom said l didn't.
Listen, we've done that.
Mom's dead.
l'm not gonna
baby you about it.
l'm talking about right now.
l'm in Vietnam
and my dog is sick.
And you know what?
Carol warned me.
This is so
fucking typical of you.
l'm sorry to get so heated.
l know you're trying.
lt's scary being so far away.
Yeah, well,
you can trust me, okay?
l know.
How...
How are you doing?
Huh, man?
l'm fine.
Fine.
Good.
CAROL: What's going on?
PHlLLlP: Carol wants me to
ask about the dog house,
if that even matters now.
Can the pool overflow?
Yes, the pool can
fucking overflow!
What the fuck's
going on over there?
lt's raining.
"Have a great vacation."
"Thank you.
Take care of my
house and dog."
"Oh, is he dead? Sorry."
You know what?
l asked you a question.
"Can the pool overflow?"
Fuck you!
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
FLORENCE: Hello?
(GUlTAR PLAYlNG)
(SlNGlNG) There's a rugged
road on the prairie
Stretchin' all across
the last frontier
There a stranger strives
solitary
Blessed is the
lonesome pioneer
Roll on, roll on, roll on
Night birds are flyin'
Come on, the light is gone
Hope's slowly dyin'
Tell me how you come
ridin' through
Can l get four beers?
Are you Roger?
Uh-huh.
l'm Gina,
Florence's friend.
Uh-huh.
l've heard
a lot about you.
Do you wanna
come join our table?
No, l think l'll stay here.
Maybe later.
lsn't she beautiful?
She's so ultra-sexy
and hot up there.
What's that look?
You're so quiet.
l'm thinking of
a letter l'm gonna write.
l hear you don't drive.
Uh-huh.
Did you ever drive?
Mmm-hmm.
l grew up here,
l drove then.
l moved to New York
and l stopped.
lt was really
nice meeting you.
Gainin' steady
till this round is won
On the long and lonely road
to kingdom come
People far below
chasin' pleasures
Offer him directions
on the run
Prophets on the path
offer treasures
And though he's mighty hungry
he takes none
Roll on, roll on, roll on
Night birds are flyin'
Come on, the light is gone
Hope's slowly dyin'
(ROCK MUSlC BLARlNG)
People don't call on
my birthday anymore.
l guess l don't call
people on their birthdays,
so why should they call me?
l didn't call you.
When's yours?
November.
That's right.
l'll call you this year.
(MAN LAUGHlNG)
We're taking
her to this side.
Laughing already
demonstrates appreciation,
the applause
seems superfluous.
And also, it's like,
just treat the restaurant
like it's your
living room, guy.
l'm weirdly on tonight.
Should we order?
Maybe l should've
invited Florence.
Or l should've had a party.
Birthdays are hard, man.
lt's weird aging, right?
lt's like, "What the fuck
is going on?"
l know.
Youth is wasted
on the young.
l'd go further.
l'd go,
"Life is wasted on
"people."
Should l invite her?
lt doesn't have
to mean anything.
l don't wanna set up
a series of expectations
with her.
What do you think?
Yeah, if you want.
l guess l could call her.
Okay, then we should
wait to order.
Maybe it'd be good.
Do you care?
No, no.
lt's a different dynamic.
Yeah.
She lives near here.
l'll see if she's around.
She probably has
other plans.
l won't get into it
being my birthday.
She's young.
Thank you.
Thanks.
(GROUP LAUGHlNG)
(CLAPPlNG)
l don't find a lot of
girls in LA attractive.
Do you?
l do, yeah.
l said l don't.
Oh, l do.
She isn't as pretty as Beth,
or her face is,
but she's bigger.
Not fat.
l find it sexy,
but you'll see.
l never found
Beth as beautiful
as everyone else did.
She was my girlfriend.
Years ago.
l didn't think
you'd take offense.
Well, you like
racist Portuguese women.
She made one remark,
and it's a cultural thing.
l mean, by our standards,
Fabula's mother is a bigot.
l know you
never liked Fabula.
Florence is. . .
lf you worked in
an office with her,
you'd definitely
develop a crush on her,
but outside the office,
you'd start to wonder
if she was as cute
as you'd imagined.
l'm just saying,
you know, Fabula is
a lot less possessive
than she used to be.
You'd like her more now.
Can l get another Scotch?
That's the busboy.
Fine, can l get another fork?
This one has some food on it.
Fabula never got you.
She thought she'd bagged
some fancy British guy
rather than just lvan.
l know she helped you
with the addiction
and everything,
but you're over that now.
We have to find you someone.
lt's too bad neither of us
are the type to go whoring.
ls that her?
Hi.
Hi.
This is lvan.
Hello.
lt's nice to meet you.
Hi. Hello.
Hi.
Sorry.
Sorry.
l'll be right back.
GlRL: Hello?
Beth.
What?
Beth?
Who?
ls this a child?
Yes.
ls your mom there?
Who is this?
Roger.
Miller?
Roger.
Mom, it's Miller!
BETH: Hello?
Beth.
Who's this?
Roger.
Oh, hi.
What are you doing?
l'm sewing Charles' pants.
Uh-huh.
ls Charles your son?
Yeah. Hot stuff.
Are you sewing
his Flash suit?
ls he the devil
or the Flash? Did he say?
Yeah.
How's the rest of
your week looking?
What'd you do with her?
She's in the bathroom.
You see what l mean
about working in an office?
Where'd you go?
l called Beth.
Really?
Come on, l mean,
Beth is a part of my life.
She's. . .
l don't believe
that things happen
for a reason, but maybe
me being out here at
this particular time,
it's happening for a reason.
(ALL LAUGHlNG)
l cannot believe
you still have this.
Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
And l got you this.
ROGER: Wow.
"The Magic Marker. Live!"
Man, look at Beller.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
Lenny not so good.
lVAN: You've got a bit of
a mullet going on there.
No, l think
that's a shadow.
You're trying so
hard to look casual.
(SlNGlNG) Happy birthday
to you
No, don't have them
do that. Don't.
Happy birthday to you
Don't.
You're such
a fucking asshole.
Roger, relax.
You know l hate this shit.
Will you stop? No. . .
Okay?
Sit on my dick, asshole!
(GASPlNG)
And many more.
What the fuck, right?
Well, he just got out
of a mental hospital.
Right.
What? Really?
l mean, who does that?
Gets the waiters.
l'm not one of these
preening LA people
who likes everything
to be about them.
l'm not some dickhead
who does karaoke
at the Farmers Market
and hosts
a running charades game
every Friday night,
and swing dances.
(LAUGHS)
What?
You told lvan to
sit on your dick.
Did l?
Yeah.
What the hell
does that mean?
(LAUGHlNG)
l don't know.
Okay.
Now,
happy birthday.
Great.
So, l got the witch.
Thanks.
l made a snap judgment.
lf you'd rather the devil,
you can switch it out.
No, l'm happy
with the witch.
You're right,
these are too
old for your niece.
l'm impressed by you.
ln what way?
l don't know.
l mean, you seem
really fine doing nothing.
lt's like you don't
feel all that bullshit
pressure to be successful.
l mean,
by other people's standards.
l'm. . .
You know,
l almost had a record deal
when l got out of college.
l haven't done nothing.
Cool.
l want to be
doing nothing.
l'm doing
nothing deliberately.
That's what l'm saying.
l don't know that
l could do nothing
and be that cool
with everything.
Well, there's so
much crap out there.
Mahler's not at home.
You could stay over.
Wink-wink.
Um. . .
l'm not supposed to. . .
l try not to. . .
But, fuck it.
Yeah, okay.
lvan's nice.
ls he your best friend?
Yeah, l guess so.
l lost lvan
there for a few years
to this racist
he met in rehab.
But their marriage is ending,
which is good for him,
and me, to be honest.
Good.
You probably
wouldn't believe this,
but in college we
all looked up to him.
He was from England
and he used to be
really handsome and stylish
and kind of great.
l can believe that.
lvan and l
call each other "man,"
but it's meant as a joke.
lt's the kind of thing
we wouldn't say, 'cause. . .
lt's our imitation
of other people.
l know what that's like.
This friend of mine,
Marnie, and me,
we went. . .
We went to this
cheesy bar in Hollywood
and we just thought,
"Let's pretend to
be these slutty girls
who are looking
to get picked up,
"even though we're not."
And we end up
talking to these
two frat guys,
but, like, 30.
And they were all
into their bodies
and cologned,
very well-groomed.
And we ended up going back
to one of their places.
And l think
one of them was, like,
almost retarded,
or else he was really drunk,
because he
didn't make any sense.
And they got out
this video camera
and Marnie and l,
we did this
kind of striptease.
And it was crazy
because we were still
playing these girls,
but there we were,
showing our breasts. . .
And then,
we ran out of
there pretty fast.
We were total freaks.
You never have
anything good to drink.
You know, that's like
the stupidest story
l've ever heard.
lt's just. . .
Bye.
What?
What is
the point of that story?
(DOOR SLAMS SHUT)
FLORENCE: Lots of really
great, interesting people
have tried to
kill themselves.
GlNA: He tried to
kill himself?
l don't think so.
l'm just saying.
Come on,
he's an asshole.
That's a defense.
He's not like us.
He's. . .
You can tell that
a lot of normal stuff
is really hard for him.
Like being nice?
l like him.
Should l call him?
No!
l don't like
how he treats you.
He acts like
you work for him.
Well, l work
for his brother.
l don't wanna be rude.
lf you keep
driving him places,
l'll stop speaking to you.
Okay.
We think it's
an autoimmune disorder.
Uh-huh.
This hospital,
it has more experience
with internal medicine.
l called,
and they're expecting you.
You can't do it here?
l mean, you know him now.
l know,
but he needs to get well.
Thank you.
Come on, Mahler.
l know the doctors there.
You'll be in good hands.
This is where we're going.
l got to pick Victor
up from school
in half an hour.
Can you ask Florence?
l'm trying
not to call her.
l'm just going to
hurt her feelings, man.
l'm trying not to do
that to people anymore.
And l don't want
to be asking anyone
for a ride anymore, ever.
l just turned 41 ,
l should be able to drive.
Why are you yelling at me?
What a pain in the ass.
Come on, come on.
Survival rate
is about 50-50,
but hopefully with
the right cocktail of drugs,
we'll be able to
get it under control
and keep him stable.
ROGER: "Dear
Hollywood Pet Taxi,
"you would think
a vehicle made expressly
"for the transportation
of animals
"would have a soft floor.
"You were given
very high marks
in the Yellow Pages.
"My next letter,
by the way.
"The fact that
the animals you transport
"have no way of
lodging a formal complaint,
"except for a well-deserved
bite of the hand
of the abuser,
"should make you
that much more caring.
"The sick ones,
like Mahler, can only look
pityingly into your eyes
"while you
ignore their pleas.
"l intend to copy the ASPCA.
"Sincerely, Roger Greenberg."
l always felt bad
about that night
after we played
the Viper Room,
and you were there
with your sister,
and l wanted to
go to that party
and you were tired
and l let you go home.
What night was that?
You were with your sister.
Yeah, l don't. . .
l don't remember that night.
l should have been
straight with you 'cause
l originally got into
music to meet girls,
and l think when we
were playing around LA
and l was starting to
get some attention. . .
From girls, yeah.
No, l understand.
Yeah, but l wasn't
clear with you
and l want to apologize
for how l behaved,
'cause l kind
of just let it end,
and left town and
was uncommunicative.
Yeah.
And l feel like
l didn't even
give you a reason. . .
Yeah, but, you know,
l knew.
Well, l'm sorry.
lt's okay.
Like l said, l don't
even remember that night.
You had bought
a new mattress
that afternoon.
(CHUCKLES) Sounds plausible.
l mean, what was it, like,
Yeah,
you didn't like the Sealy,
you thought it was too mushy.
We used to make that
"The extra 'S'
for extra sex."
Okay. Okay.
(ROGER LAUGHlNG)
We could've gotten
married and had kids.
Yeah? Do you think?
l don't think we would've.
Really.
l don't know,
it was a big
relationship for me.
So, you're a carpenter now?
Yeah. l was always
good at making things,
so. . .
Oh, yeah?
Beth,
l made you that bed.
Don't you remember?
lt was why
we were going to buy
the mattress to begin with.
Yes, l do.
l do. l do remember that.
l'm sorry. Totally.
Go on.
l work out of
a studio in Bushwick
that l share with
a few other carpenters
and that's
been pretty good.
lt's political, though.
Um. . .
What else?
Recently,
l had this thing
where l
couldn't move my legs,
literally.
You know,
but it was psychological.
God. . .
Yeah, so that took
some time dealing with.
l think that
brings us up to date.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
l just. . .
l think l need to
just let go, you know?
l had a shrink
there who said,
"You only miss by 5%."
l'm not positive
what it means,
but in most things,
l had a shrink
once who told me,
"You're of value."
lt's stupid,
but it always stayed with me.
You look really pretty.
Thanks.
My dog is sick.
Oh, yeah?
My mom is sick.
Phillip's dog, really,
but l'm taking care of him.
He has
an autoimmune disorder.
Since he got sick,
l keep thinking
l have something.
l'm sorry about your mom.
Yeah.
l'm glad you're
feeling better.
l get horrible
anxiety sometimes, still.
Yeah, that l remember.
Do you want to
have dinner one night?
This week?
Or next.
l kind of meant. . .
Like, on a date.
Oh.
No. (LAUGHS)
l mean, you know,
that's just a terrible idea.
No. l mean, you know, no.
Hello.
Shit, they just. . .
They don't even. . .
She doesn't seem to. . .
She looks harried
even though no one's here.
l'm just going to
go get her.
l'm sure she'll be by.
Hi. Could you send our bill?
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
What is going on? Okay.
Water. Water.
Oh, God.
Hello.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
(lN DEEP VOlCE)
Lenny not so good.
(CHUCKLES)
Not too late to call,
l hope.
No.
Watching Just My Luck
with Lindsay Lohan
on Starz.
Mmm. How is it?
Kind of funny.
She's got charm.
All right.
So, l was thinking
we should maybe
do something together again.
Write some songs.
Aren't you going
back to New York?
Yeah, but...
lf we got something going
l could stay here, possibly.
l don't know if
l've really got time,
you know,
with the computer
work and Victor.
Uh-huh.
lsn't it funny, don't you
still think of yourself
as a guitar player
even though you
don't do it anymore?
No. No. No, l don't.
You know,
l've just hired this guy
called Ezra to help
with the company, so. . .
lt's just, you know,
l've got to
concentrate on that.
Okay.
l think l'm having
a party tomorrow.
Tomorrow?
A pool party. So, come.
Bring Victor.
Pool party? Cool.
After we hang up,
l'm going to
call some people.
Okay, man. Listen,
l'll see you tomorrow.
All right. Bye.
(POP SONG PLAYlNG)
MAN: Do you want to
see a Bigfoot walk?
Very famous footage
of him doing this.
He doesn't wear no shoes.
Bigfoot.
And there's lots of
scientific evidence,
my friend.
Megan's husband
wants to know,
do you know what kind of tree
that skinny one with
the yellow flowers is?
No.
l mean, l wouldn't
even think to know
something like that.
Are you coming out?
Victor wants to
show you his dive.
ls it okay? ls it a dud?
l do this,
l throw a party last minute,
then l'm disappointed
that no one can come.
lt's fine.
We're having fun.
l need to put
together the chips
and guac and
Creamsicles l bought.
l got you iced tea
and lemonade,
but l didn't know
the right proportions,
so you'll have to make it.
l see. Thanks.
l guess l'll
make an appearance.
Are you pulling a Gatsby
and watching the party
from afar?
l don't know that
l need to document
the reasons how this
isn't like a Gatsby.
Marlon and Peggy
are really nice.
l didn't even invite them,
they just come here.
lt turns out they've got
a son who went to the
same school as Victor.
lt's such a small world.
Why is that
news to you?
lt is a small world.
l'm surprised we all
don't run into each
other more often.
You and l went to
school together.
(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG)
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
Hey.
Hey, Rog.
(ANSWERlNG MACHlNE BEEPS)
Hi, this is Florence.
l'm sorry to be calling,
but l wanted to
check and see how...
Hello?
Oh, l wanted to check
and see how Mahler is.
We had to move him
to another vet.
Really?
Yeah, they do better
with internal medicine there.
l was going to
call you, but. . .
ls he okay?
What did they say?
(VACUUM CLEANER WHlRRlNG)
l thought it was sciatica.
Can you. . .
Please.
(WHlRRlNG STOPS)
l'd like to see
him at the hospital,
if you can give
me the information.
We don't have to
see each other.
We can go at different times.
l like the old vet better.
Gina told me it's
nice to leave them
something that
smells like you.
Sometimes l think
he's a human
in a dog costume.
Wait.
(BOTH MOANlNG)
(ROGER PANTlNG)
l don't know any of this.
l don't know Karen Dalton.
Very cool. Thanks.
You sure you don't know it?
No. No.
Thanks. Thank you.
You can tell me
if you know it.
l don't.
Karen Dalton was,
like, this homeless
junkie in the '70s.
You know,
it's a woman with sandals.
Maybe there's something
you can sing on there.
You like old things.
A shrink said to me once,
l have trouble
living in the present,
so l linger on the past
because l felt like
l never really lived it
in the first place, you know?
Do you think
you could love me?
l don't know, Florence.
l just get excited
to see you, and then. . .
l think l get worried
it's gonna go too fast,
so l say things
to get a reaction.
What?
We got to stop this.
Really?
Yeah.
You got to stop calling me.
l've intentionally
not called you.
Even when l needed
to call you, l didn't.
You know, l took a pet taxi.
l haven't called you.
You called me today.
That was for Mahler.
Come on,
it wasn't for Mahler.
Florence,
take some responsibility.
Don't put yourself in
this kind of situation.
What situation?
l like seeing you.
No, you don't.
You don't like it.
Why are we even
having this conversation?
We're not really even dating,
and we're
seeing other people.
l'm not seeing anyone.
Neither am l,
but l want to.
Who?
l don't know! Anyone.
l'm doing nothing.
l'm not tied to anyone.
How many times do we
have to go over it?
Jesus, l. . .
l should be with
a divorced 38-year-old
who has teenage kids
and low expectations
about life.
l don't want to
fucking do this anymore.
God !
(POP SONG PLAYlNG)
Half a pill three
times a day with food.
The blood thinners,
just at night.
They're for the blood clots.
And he'll get prednisone,
which is a steroid,
twice a day for three days,
and then we'll bring him down
to one-and-a-half a day
and the blood
thinners every other day.
Okay?
Hi, little Mahler baby.
Tried lvan,
but he had a birthday party.
l didn't want to cram him
into a shitty pet taxi.
Hi, baby.
Thank you for doing this.
l'm here for Mahler.
Gina says l'm crazy
to drive you anywhere.
Right.
Your credit card.
$3,084?
He seems better.
Give me his pills and
l'll mark them for you,
so you don't forget.
(PHONE RlNGlNG)
(ON ANSWERlNG MACHlNE) Hi,
you've reached the Greenbergs,
please leave a message.
lf you put
the pills in peanut butter,
they go down easier.
(OVER PHONE) Roger,
it's Phillip. Pick up.
Pick up!
Fuck it. l got
a very weird message
from Florence.
She's thinking of quitting.
What the fuck's
going on over there?
Did you do something
that freaked her out?
Do you know
how hard it is to find
an assistant l actually like?
Jesus! l can't
trust you with anyone.
CAROL: How is Mahler?
How is Mahler, by the way?
Did you pick him up today?
Call me.
(WATER RUNNlNG)
Are you cooking?
You wanna make Jell-O?
The vet said
that the steroids
might upset his stomach.
l'll just. . . l'll cook
this and then l'll go.
Gonna make chicken, too?
l can pick up a roast
chicken at the market.
He shouldn't have the skin,
it's too rich.
l can eat the skin.
You wanna have
chicken and rice
with Mahler?
You can walk to Ralphs,
it's three blocks from here.
Okay, will you be
here when l get back?
Oh, my God.
l'll go get the chicken,
but l'm going to call
you when l'm pulling up
and l want you to come out
and l want you to get it
from me.
(HONKlNG HORN)
Thank you.
Listen, l'm sorry about
my freak-out the other night.
You know?
l gotta try to not do that.
l get abusive and
l'm working on that.
So, anyway, l apologize.
Thank you.
l mean, it's not just me.
You do participate
in it, too, though.
l mean, don't you think?
No, then you're not
apologizing, you know.
l'm. . .
This isn't a good day
for me. l'm gonna go.
l'm apologizing
for my side of it.
That's not an apology.
Well, apologizing is hard.
No, it's not.
Not for me.
Well, it is for me.
You know what, Florence?
You know what l think?
l think you're
transferring shit onto me.
l think you're looking
to me for the mental
and physical abuse
of your father,
and sexual molestation,
or whatever.
l was not molested.
Or whatever.
He was withholding.
l'm right about that, right?
l was not molested !
l said "whatever."
AUTOMATED VOlCE: You have
reached the voicemail of Gina.
Gina, call me back
when you get this, okay?
Also, we have to be there
at 7:00 in the morning,
so you should
pick me up at 6:30.
(MUSlC PLAYlNG ON STEREO)
(SlNGlNG ALONG)
Hands across the water
Heads across the sky
Admiral Halsey notified me
He had to have a berth
or he couldn't get to sea
(PHONE RlNGS)
Hey.
Hey.
(SlGHS)
l thought you were Gina.
No, it's me.
Roger.
This one's for me.
What?
l was talking to Mahler.
Why are you calling me?
l wanted to speak to you.
You need some more granola?
(LAUGHlNG)
Or ice-cream sandwiches?
Come on.
I mean, are we
seeing each other or not?
Well, that's what
l wanna talk about.
l don't know, l mean,
l'm leaving in,
like, a week.
Hurt people hurt people.
"Hurt people hurt people"?
Hurt people hurt people.
lt's something
a singing coach of mine
told me.
Shit!
Sorry.
ls somebody there?
No.
l just spilled my champagne.
Forget it.
You never fucked that guy
who plays guitar with you?
No!
l don't want this
to sound dramatic,
and l wasn't
gonna say anything,
and Gina's taking me.
l mean, it's not yours.
lt's. . .
l found out
a couple of days ago.
l don't know,
it's gotta be my ex's,
because l'm six
or seven weeks,
and you and l
have only just. . .
And you used a condom.
(LAUGHS)
l didn't wanna tell you.
l mean, it's weird.
l've been pregnant
this whole time.
Uh-huh.
l made
an appointment for a D&C.
l'm really sensitive to pain,
so l asked for anesthesia.
Sorry,
l'm trying to get drunk now.
l can't eat after 1 0:00.
l'll take you to it.
How's that gonna work?
Am l gonna drive
you to take me?
(ROCK AND ROLL MUSlC BLARlNG)
Can you turn it down?
l'm sorry.
(TURNS MUSlC DOWN)
My head is killing me.
No, it's fine.
Don't worry.
lt's your day, or. . .
You know what l mean.
We'll be here
when you get out.
Okay. Thanks.
ROGER: Don't be nervous.
l just don't know what
l'm doing with my life.
You're of value.
l know that.
You don't have to say that.
We could get
her some flowers.
l thought since she
couldn't eat, she might
be hungry when it's over.
Here.
Well, when you're ready.
Thanks.
Could we go?
They apparently
won't let us go
until you pee.
Oh.
l don't have to.
Maybe when you
get to the bathroom,
you'll feel like it.
l need to lie here
for a little longer.
But you'll probably
be more comfortable
lying at home.
Let her sleep, man.
You like me so much more
than you think you do.
Okay.
Wish it wasn't too late
to get my medical degree.
lt's not too late.
l'd be over 50 by
the time l graduated.
What is it?
Four years, right?
Yeah, but l know myself.
l'd procrastinate,
take time off.
Eight years at best.
Who's gonna hire a 49. . .
Let's just call it 50.
A 50-year-old vet?
l'm confused.
Are you going to vet school
or regular medical school?
(SlGHS)
Neither, clearly.
l have to get back
for Mahler's pills.
lt's a stupid rule.
l mean, what does peeing
have to do with anything?
Fabula makes this
rice dish with pineapples
and raisins.
lt's really delicious.
l think you'll
find lots of girls
who'll be able
to make that dish.
No, no, no. This is
a Brazilian specialty.
Still.
Are you guys
Florence's friends?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay. She's sleeping
and she wants to
stay the night.
Did she pee?
ROGER: You wanna come in,
watch a video?
lVAN: No,
l should get going.
Where?
l think l'll go back to
the motel, take a nap.
Didn't sleep too
well last night.
l'm leaving in,
like, a week.
We'll hang out some more,
don't worry.
You're sure it's okay l left?
She might wake
up and be scared.
She'll be fine.
The nurse seemed nice.
l had to
get back for Mahler.
l understand.
No, l know. l'm not
explaining myself to you.
l'm just saying.
You're just saying, right?
Come on, one drink.
No, l really gotta go.
Okay.
l appreciate your friendship.
Can l ask,
what do people say about me?
Like, negative
things l wouldn't know.
Let me go, man.
Come on,
l'm sure people must trash me
when l'm not around.
They don't trash you.
Okay, what criticisms
do they have?
(SlGHS) l don't know.
l'd say the biggest
criticism they have is that
you have trouble
making fun of yourself.
Really?
That's incredible.
l'm the funniest person
l know.
Well, not about yourself.
Really?
That's what people say.
l wouldn't get too
worried about it.
These things
aren't difficult to fix.
Right.
People say they think
you lie about things
you don't need to lie about,
that you don't
make any effort,
that you're
a bit of a prince.
Who says?
Who are these people?
That's just totally insane.
l'm just telling
you what l've heard.
lf anything
l'd say l'm too honest,
don't you think?
Yeah.
l mean,
l'm pretty upfront with. . .
No effort?
Mmm-hmm.
l'm making
my brother's family
a doghouse.
You know,
l brought my tool
kit out from New York.
They had to check my
bag because of that.
l always do carry-on.
l have calluses.
Does Beller say this?
l think Beller said it, yeah.
And others, too.
Johno, maybe once, and Anna.
That's funny.
Yeah.
Completely wrong,
but funny.
All right.
(GlRL LAUGHlNG)
(GlRLS CHATTERlNG)
Hello?
ROGER: Sara?
There's the strange man
who's been
sleeping in my room.
Oh, this is Muriel.
Hey.
l heard you killed our dog.
No. No, no,
he's all better.
We brought him
back yesterday.
Well, where is he?
Mahler!
Mahler? Mahler!
We leave for Australia
tomorrow morning.
lsn't that like
a 20-hour flight?
No, it's 1 4.
So that's,
like, seven movies.
Yeah.
lVAN: Hello?
Party of 20-year-olds
has suddenly happened
at my house.
Hey, man.
How was your nap?
Yeah, it was fine.
Where are you?
l'm having dinner
with my family.
Your parents?
No.
My other family.
Fabula.
Mmm-hmm.
Do you want me to
come over there?
No! lt's okay.
Just don't do anything.
l'm not sure
l know what you mean.
You should come here after.
l really gotta go.
Okay. Call you later.
(HlP HOP MUSlC
PLAYlNG ON STEREO)
Hey! He just got
out of the hospital.
l'm sorry.
You know,
don't give him beer.
l'm so sorry.
He's got
an autoimmune disorder,
all right? Mahler.
l didn't know.
ROGER: Mahler.
Mahler.
(lNDlSTlNCT CHATTERlNG)
Hey, man,
you got a cool place.
Oh, thanks.
lt's not totally mine,
but. . .
Yeah, what do you do?
Oh, l'm kind of doing
nothing for a while.
ROGER: ls that coke?
Yup.
l'd heard coke was in again.
Yeah, you want some?
Um. . .
l'm Rich.
Roger Greenberg.
ls it okay to mix
coke and Zoloft?
Yeah, totally.
l haven't done this in,
like, 1 5 years.
Since college, or since
a couple of years out.
lt's very unlike me.
l actually hate coke.
l hate it politically
and l hate how
it makes me feel.
But when it's done,
l may have to
kill one of you out
of sheer frustration.
l'm gonna change the record.
We need better coke music.
Oh, yeah.
Put on some Korn.
l got the perfect thing.
lVAN: Hello?
Hey, man.
Hey, man.
l just did a line.
l think the last time
l did coke was with you.
lt was just a line,
but l feel really wired.
l guess my tolerance is less.
Okay.
Hey, you done with dinner?
No, we're still eating.
GlRL: Put on AC/DC!
You sure you
don't want me there?
Yeah.
l've gotta go, man.
l almost feel like l can
get in a car and drive.
(ElGHTlES POP PLAYlNG)
Don't do that.
You gotta come
here when you're done.
JERRY: Oh, dude! Come on !
Fuck off, Jerry!
Tonight's not good, man.
Man, you gotta come!
l can't believe
you lied to me
about your dinner.
GlRL: Put on AC/DC!
lt's actually
a pretty fun party.
Man, I can't!
All right. l got to go.
GlRL: We wanna
hear AC/DC!
Don't, okay?
Come on ! Duran Duran's
great coke music.
Give it a chance.
Let's maybe not
keep saying coke
in every sentence.
l read an article.
Aren't you guys all just
fucking on the lnternet?
BOY: Not all of us.
But some?
l guess some.
Yeah,
l think Paige has a site,
but it's more art than porn.
They shot a skin
flick on my campus,
a couple guys
and some townies,
and they acted in it.
Sick.
Hey, can't we put on
some Korn?
No, we can't put on
fucking Korn. Jesus!
You guys smoke crack
at all?
GlRL: l don't.
l have, once or twice.
l might get back into drugs.
l've got a Vicodin,
if you want.
l could use that, actually.
You want
a neck massage?
Uh. . .
Okay. Normally,
l'd say no because
l'm a little OCD, but. . .
Okay.
That's great.
Are you kids really
different from me?
l mean,
do the movies,
and the iPods,
and the facility
with MySpace pages
make you guys
really different?
l don't know.
Every article l read
seems to be saying that.
Definitely feel it.
Good coke.
(ALL LAUGHlNG)
What?
Nothing.
You're funny.
You're mean.
The thing about you kids
is you're all
kind of insensitive.
l'm glad l grew
up when l did,
'cause your parents
were too perfect
at parenting.
All that Baby Mozart
and Dan Zanes songs.
You're so sincere and
interested in things.
There's a confidence
in you guys
that's horrifying.
You're all ADD
and carpal tunnel.
You wouldn't know agoraphobia
if it bit you in the ass,
and it makes you mean.
You say things to
someone like me,
who's older and smarter,
with this blithe air.
l'm freaked out
by you kids.
(ALL LAUGHlNG)
l hope l die before
l end up meeting one of you
in a job interview.
Fuck or fight?
What?
Fuck or fight?
What are you
fighting against?
What do you got?
Uh. . . l don't
have much.
Ah-ha! Then that's what
l'm fighting against,
not much.
Boom !
(HEAVY METAL MUSlC PLAYlNG)
What the fuck?
Rich, you asshole.
l didn't do anything, man.
Oh. Sorry.
Hey, get off the stereo.
l was listening to that.
Where's the Duran Duran?
"Where's the Duran Duran?"
Hey, careful, those
are my brother's records.
"Those are my
brother's records."
Fuck off.
(SCREAMS) Jesus!
There's something
in the pool !
Hey, don't feed him.
No, don't feed him !
Mahler, drop it!
Mahler, drop it.
Mahler, drop it.
Drop it. Drop it.
GlRL: Ow!
God, what is it?
l think it's
a bird or an opossum,
or something.
lt's a. . .
l think we've had
one of these before.
(SCREAMS)
Holy shit!
(ALL SCREAMlNG)
(LAUGHlNG)
All right.
lt's coming to get your ass!
l'm sorry your dog
has AlDS.
He doesn't have AlDS.
lt's an autoimmune disorder.
(lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE)
How is Lenny?
Hey, man.
Hey, you okay, man?
ls that pot?
Where did you get that?
You want a puff?
No, man, l quit.
You know that.
Okay, man. Okay.
lsn't this weird?
So, how'd it go?
Fine.
And?
l think
we're gonna have another try.
You're shitting me.
Please don't make
this hard for me.
Oh, God, man.
Don't give in.
l know it's the harder,
more painful decision
to stay free,
but that's what
adulthood is.
l mean, l could
just stay with Florence
because it's easy,
but l don't want easy.
You've been dating
Florence for a month.
l've been married for
Don't tell me
about adulthood.
We're not dating, exactly.
That's my point!
Hey, you're
shouting at me.
lt's been a really
hard time for me, Roger.
l mean, l miss my family.
l feel like
all the hard work
l've done over the years,
kicking the drugs,
being a dad,
l feel like it's all
slipping away from me.
lt's not going away.
lt's transforming.
You're going through
something, which means. . .
l don't think you
understand what it's been
like for me out here,
how the life l'd hoped for. . .
lt's huge to
finally embrace the life
you never planned on.
l wanted to make
that record.
We never would've
survived at a major label
with those restrictions.
How the fuck do you know?
Because that's not
how the world works.
What could you possibly know
about how the world works?
Listen, man,
l think you're playing out
some old family
dynamic here. . .
Apropos of what we
were saying before
about what
people say about us?
People feel you hold on
to petty resentments.
You asked me what
people say about you.
l don't want to know.
Yeah, well,
you should know.
People think you
play the victim.
And l don't mean
this in a bad way,
but you let people
feel sorry for you
when you're
really just protecting
your own narcissism.
l don't want to know!
Well, that's why l didn't
want to be in a fucking
band with you !
Because you won't
acknowledge your own shit.
And you were
fucked up all the time!
What do you want
me to say, huh?
What do you want me to say?
l had no idea that
would be our only offer.
l didn't think that
l had the power to blow it.
l thought that we were all
just giving our two cents.
Fuck, l didn't know
l was gonna be
the one to make
the band fall apart.
You know, maybe,
obviously, l would
do it differently now!
Of course l know what
it's like to live a life
l didn't plan on.
What the fuck do
you think l'm doing
right now?
Florence told me
you were in the hospital.
l'd know,
l understand
about those things.
You know,
we could've talked about it,
maybe made each
other feel better,
but instead we never talk
about anything good.
This is a small thing,
and it's probably
boring for you,
but it would've been nice
if you'd have made
an effort to know Vic.
Who's Vic?
My son.
Oh, Victor. l didn't
recognize the diminutive.
(ON ANSWERlNG MACHlNE)
Hi, it's Florence.
Leave a message.
Florence.
Florence, l'm calling
to say l'm sorry
you had to go through
what you're going through.
And Mahler's fine.
He ate pizza.
l'm leaving this
in your voicemail,
but it's really a letter.
l get so angry about
the world, you know?
lf l knew who
to write a letter to
about all the stupidity
in the world, l'd do it.
You're 25.
l was just 27.
You're brave.
Young people are brave.
When l was a kid,
l was a leader
and most of the kids
always looked up to me.
l thought l might go
into space, you know,
as an astronaut.
(CHUCKLES) l can't even
swim in the fucking pool.
My brother's in Vietnam.
We have the same parents.
l can't blame that.
l really love Phillip,
but l'm not supposed
to be on his bed.
l love my parents.
l love Mahler.
l miss my mom.
l really like you.
l just hate how
embarrassing it all is.
l don't understand.
What happened to me?
Where does experience go?
Remember Charlie Sheen
standing on his balcony
in Wall Street?
Did you see that movie?
Saying, "Who am l?"
Phillip and l used to
make so much fun of it.
l'm thinking, now,
it wasn't so stupid.
Somebody once said to me,
"Hurt people hurt people."
lt's kind of trite,
but it stayed with me.
Oh, man ! That was you,
like, a few days ago.
l used to have
a really good memory, too.
Anyway, we do. . .
l do hurt people.
Hurt people.
l think lvan and l broke up.
Florence, l really like you.
Love, Roger.
(GlRLS CHATTERlNG)
Assholes.
(GlRL LAUGHlNG)
Dicks.
MURlEL: l don't understand
why she did it.
SARA: Good morning, sunshine.
Holy shit!
How you feeling, Sunny?
What's "Sunny"?
We decided that's
our name for you.
l think l'm still drunk.
Hey, they printed my
letter about Pakistan.
SARA: Cool.
"Roger Greenberg.
Hollywood, California."
SARA: l mean,
l've got no problem
giving some guy a blowjob,
but she has taken
it to the extreme.
MURlEL: Why do
guys like to do that?
Come on you and spread it?
They don't all like it.
(LAUGHS) They do.
No, they don't.
You just like guys
who do that.
(LAUGHS) Fuck you !
You're really good with him.
You have dogs?
No, Florence showed me
how to do it.
Did you start an affair
with Phillip's assistant?
No.
l'm jealous. (CHUCKLES)
You should come to
Australia with us.
Yeah?
There's a great Kinks song
called Australia.
Totally.
You should totally come.
Maybe l will.
Okay.
But you better hurry.
We gotta leave in,
like, five minutes.
SARA: Fuck!
What are we gonna
do about Mahler?
Oh, fuck.
Can l ask you guys a favor?
Yeah. What's happening?
How you doing?
l'm Roger, by the way.
Marlon and Peggy.
Sorry it's such a mess.
Yeah,
we're gonna go home.
Can you take Mahler
until Wednesday?
Uh. . .
Yeah, sure.
We love Mahler.
Come here, baby.
ROGER: Great.
No, wait a second.
You know,
run it by his nose.
Okay.
No sweat.
Thanks, man.
And he takes prednisone,
which is a steroid,
twice a day for
the next three days.
l'll write this out.
Also,
there's an antibiotic
and a blood thinner,
but l'll write
it down for you.
Let's go! We still
have to get you a ticket.
ROGER: What time is it?
Come on !
lt's fucking peaceful,
is what it is.
SARA: l love it.
Did you see sharks last time?
Oh, fuck!
SARA: Okay.
You know what
really pisses me off,
is fucking Lily.
Once again.
l still can't get over that.
What a slut.
Like, l'm thinking
about it now,
and it's so much worse
than l remembered.
Now that l feel like,
maybe l was drunk
at the time.
l've seen a great white,
and there are
the most amazing wrecks.
l literally cannot wait.
l love that
you're doing this.
ls this completely crazy?
SARA: No!
l mean, it's what
people do, right?
You'll love Australia.
For some people,
this is nothing.
MURlEL: And who knows
how much longer the Reef's
gonna be around?
There's this starfish
that's killing
the marine life.
Roger, are you certified?
To what?
Dive.
No, l don't really swim.
(BOTH LAUGHlNG)
(COUGHlNG)
MURlEL: You can go look at
whales while we dive.
Sunny will look at whales.
Okay, you know what?
You can cut out
the Sunny business.
(MURlEL COUGHlNG)
SARA: Oh, my God,
look at this guy in these
overalls and the clogs.
l left my ChapStick.
Oh, my God.
Are overalls back in now,
or is he crazy?
No, l saw a bunch of
people in overalls. . .
MURlEL: Hey,
will you check this out?
SARA: What the fuck
is that?
That is so weird.
l know, right? lt's so itchy.
Don't touch it.
Don't touch it.
You know what?
l'm supposed to get
someone from the hospital.
No, no, no.
Hold it. Hey! Hey, hold it!
Can you open my door?
No, you're our prisoner.
Exactly.
Come on, open
the fucking door, please.
Okay, fine.
Come on.
Roger, it's a rental.
Open it.
Would you stop?
Sara, open the fucking door!
l'm trying.
Stop pulling on it!
You know, l can't go,
l can't afford it
(STAMMERlNG) and l have to
pick up my friend.
Have a good time,
all right?
MURlEL: Bye!
l've got to get insurance.
The anesthesia's
so expensive.
l'm such a baby
about pain.
And l stayed overnight.
l'm glad your brother's
coming back next week.
l need to work more hours.
Thanks.
l really picked
my lip in my sleep,
which was possibly
about finding a pet
in the Canyons.
Do you, uh,
get The New York Times?
No.
lt's good to get the paper.
l'll pick you up one.
Okay.
Did you get my message?
l haven't checked yet.
What did you say?
Um. . .
l reassessed
the movie Wall Street,
among other things.
l don't know it.
l wasn't gonna give it to you
'cause l was pissed,
but you can open it.
Happy birthday, again.
Thanks.
Now you have the set.
Not that they're a set.
What about your niece?
Remember,
the sticks are too old.
She's coming
over this weekend.
l framed her picture.
Do you have
a tape-measure?
l think there's a ruler
in the desk drawer.
Do you have a hammer?
Maybe in there.
Here?
You want it on
this wall, here?
Okay.
Cool.
Like a professional.
Well, l am a professional.
l mean, l build things.
l know you know
l was in a hospital.
l'm not hiding it.
But it's not what
defines me, you know?
l understand.
(HAMMERlNG)
l want to
listen to my message.
l'd had some to drink.
Gina.
My mom.
Okay. This is you.
(POP MUSlC PLAYlNG)