Kismet (1955) Movie Script

Yes, yes, yes.
Rise and pray for all is writ.
All is writ.
If everything is written down,
what's the use of getting up?
Oh, Father. You gave me
the whole blanket again.
- That's untrue.
- You mean, I took it?
I mean, it is not a whole blanket.
Only half.
Only enough to cover one small girl.
It's empty.
We ate the last loaf for supper.
- Don't you remember?
- Stomachs have no memories.
And I at the moment am all stomach.
Not even a crumb.
Perhaps today will be kind to us.
Allah, I make a prayer for my daughter.
And I, for my father.
Let this day spare her
the monkey bites of hunger and want.
Let my verses sell in profusion...
...that my daughter may eat
and prosper and wear shoes.
I pray the unselfishness
of my father's prayer be noted.
Remove us from Earth
If we've nothing to stay for.
They pray the best...
...who have something to pray for.
Oh, look.
Look, the camel likes your rhymes.
- See, it's an omen.
- I thank you.
Rhymes. Rhymes for sale.
Rhymes. Fine rhymes,
sweet rhymes have I.
Rhymes for sale.
Poetry in profusion.
Rhymes to help you sell your wares.
Charm your wives. Educate your children.
Ah. There's a won'thy citizen.
A rhyme for any purpose you name.
What use has a butcher for rhymes?
Sir, to increase your sales.
What meat do you sell today?
Nothing. Nothing but leftovers of mutton.
Good, good.
The haunch of the paunch
Or the rib of a sheep
Is tasty and tender,
Though priced a bit steep.
The part that you can buy
With no financial frown
Is on the ground
When the sheep's sitting down.
You're mad. Mad.
A man can sell anything in the world
except poems.
He can sell poisons, emetics,
false noses, but no poems.
Alms for love of Allah.
- Has your hunger grown?
- Like a magic tree.
Alms for the love of Allah.
There are fresh oranges this morning
at the Bazaar of the Vendors.
- I'll be there.
- Do not take so many.
- They interfere with your speed of foot.
- Oh, my father's wisdom always guides me.
Alms for the love of Allah.
Alms for love of Allah.
Alms for love of Allah.
Oh, great master...
...thou shalt live if thou shalt give.
- Ah!
May though soul burn by fire,
O thou dog.
A father sending his daughter to steal.
Could anything be baser than that?
Take note, Allah,
how low a human can sink to the bottom.
Alms for the love of Allah.
Sir, do you wish to purchase a poem?
Poem? Are you not a beggar?
I beg your pardon.
Do I look like a beggar?
Alms for love of Allah.
Alms for love of Allah.
Open thy purse and let the
inflicted bend over the house of Mecca.
Hard father, may Allah ruin thee forever.
Alms for the love of Allah.
You can't beg here.
This is one of the best begging locations
in Baghdad.
- Oh?
- Why do you think this space is empty?
It's not empty. I'm here.
It must remain empty
until old Hajj returns from Mecca.
That begging place belongs to him.
My dear verminous friends,
I am a cousin to old Hajj.
- That's impossible.
- Please, come, consider.
Only a Hajj may sit here. That is the law.
Would I dare risk it if I were not a Hajj?
- Omar.
- Would I?
Alms for the love of Allah.
- Oh, may Allah give thee ease.
- Alms for a starving brother.
- May Allah give thee ease.
Alms for the love of Allah.
Oh, stop it.
Alms for the love of Allah.
Alms for the love of Allah.
Alms for the love of Allah.
What's this? Where's old Hajj?
Hajj has gone to Mecca, great sir.
Yeah, this fellow claims to be
a member of the family.
A customer of Hajj's, I presume?
I am taking over his practice.
All my life, I have given one dinar
each morning to Hajj the Beggar.
I am too old to change beggars.
You say you're too old
to change beggars.
Your attitude strikes me as strange.
It's easy enough to change beggars.
What's difficult is to beg change.
Not bad. Ha-ha.
Not bad.
Here, you deserve encouragement. Here.
One dinar is not enough
to encourage me.
- Take it. Take it.
- No, it's too little. You're too stingy, no.
Now, the beggars tell us what to give.
Well, here.
- But not for the beggar, for the poet.
- I thank you.
- You disgrace us.
- We mustrt seem to be greedy.
- We're not supposed to notice the amount.
- It's the spirit behind the gift that counts.
Never have I seen a profession
more keenly in need of new blood.
As of now, this business
is under new management.
Alms for the love of Allah.
Give me a few dozen dinar, my friend.
And an already pleasant morning
will be made pleasanter for both of us.
If you do not wish my blessing,
I'll be happy to give you my curse.
I do not give money away.
I'm a businessman.
May the graves of your ancestors
vanish in the spring floods.
May your wives grow warts
on their noses.
May your taxes increase.
- May your taxes increase.
- May your taxes increase.
May your taxes increase.
May your taxes increase.
May your taxes increase.
- May your taxes increase.
- I sat down, feeling desolated
Bowed my head and crossed my knees
Is fortune really predicated
Upon such tiny turns as these?
Then fate's a thing without a head
A puzzle never understood
And man proceeds where he is led
Unguaranteed of bad or good
Fate can be the trap in your path
The bitter cup of your tears
Your wine of wrath
Fate can be shade in the desert blaze
Sudden food in a famine found
The sound of praise
Incomprehensible and strange
Fate can play a trick with the twine
To weave the evil and good
In one design
And so my destiny
I look at you and cannot see
Is it good? Is it ill?
Am I blessed? Am I cursed?
Is it honey on my tongue or brine?
What fate
What fate is mine
Fate can play a trick with the twine
To weave the evil and good
In one design
And so my destiny
I look at you and cannot see
Is it good? Is it ill?
Am I blessed? Am I cursed?
Is it honey on my tongue or brine?
What fate, what fate is...
Good morning, O giant men of the desert.
Welcome to civilization.
You are the beggar called Hajj?
Even so am I. Far and wide the name of...
Permit me to correct myself.
My name is not Hajj.
- Silence.
- But my name... But my name is not...
You, what is this beggar's name?
- He said that Hajj, that he...
- Thank you.
But I tell you, you're making a mistake.
It must be a case of mistaken identity.
And I...
You're making a terrible mistake.
I don't think...
Now I know what you are.
You're slavers.
Slave traders of the desert. Allah! Allah!
- We have him, master. Hajj the Beggar.
- Good.
Such a profitless error. I have nothing.
Oh, glorious chieftain, let me be,
I pray you.
I'm not won'th selling at the slave market.
Look, my bad legs, injured in a fall,
unable to bear my weight.
I'm old, foolish, forgetful
and broken-brained.
I'm won'thless. Less than won'thless.
Talks a lot, doesn't he?
Are the irons hot?
Quite hot, master.
Take a look at my face.
Do you know me?
I know no one and nothing.
I have no memory.
- I am Jawan.
- Jawan. Oh, no.
Your memory freshens.
Well, it's a famous name, Jawan.
Let me see, it strikes a chord.
You're Jawan the great astronomer.
You dissemble poorly.
I'm Jawan, the robber, the brigand,
as you very well know.
But I don't know.
I've no interest in such matters.
By tomorrow, I will have forgotten
your face, I could never identify you.
- Bare his belly.
- Why? What for?
We're gonna decorate it with a white-hot
coal, gleaming in its navel like a jewel.
- In Allah's name, what have I done?
- Can it be he's forgotten?
Fifteen years ago you put a curse upon me,
Hajj the Beggar.
I have only been Hajj the Beggar
since this morning.
- His mind has rotted like a fig.
- I have never seen you before.
I know that. But 15 years ago, you put
a curse upon my name, Hajj the Beggar.
Soon after,
my only son was stolen from me.
All these years,
I've sought for my son everywhere.
I've offered ransom
that would purchase all Persia.
- Now, I am to die soon.
- Oh, let's hope not.
I must find my son in the weeks
remaining to me.
The wise men tell me it is your curse...
...that keeps me from him.
- Ah. Do they really?
- How much ransom did you offer?
- Never mind. Remove the curse.
Certainly, of course. Delighted to do
the best I can under these conditions.
- Don't haggle. Remove the curse.
- Jawan, you don't understand.
A curse must be removed voluntarily.
That's the law of curses.
A curse is nothing more than a prayer,
a prayer for harm.
A prayer is born in the heart,
not the mouth.
- You'd pray for me and not mean it.
- For money, I would.
- Would Allah accept prayer that's paid for?
- Aye, indeed so.
Do you not give money to mosques
and to holy men?
Do they not bless you and pray for you?
- That is true. Give him a gold piece.
- Is that all your son is won'th?
- Lf my patience snaps...
- You'll have eternity to regret it.
Think, Jawan.
Listen to death chuckling in your chest.
What good will your wealth be
when the chuckle becomes a roar?
Your tongue is cunning.
Give him 10 gold pieces.
- A hundred. Do I not offer you your son?
- A hundred?
Happiness on Earth
as well as a cushion in paradise?
How much is too much for eternal bliss?
Will I find my son this day?
This day? Possibly within the hour.
Saddle a horse.
A plain mount, it'll go unnoticed.
Don't risk entering the city. You'll be taken
by the Wazir's police. Tortured. Beheaded.
If I must die in Baghdad,
how can I avoid it?
By staying out of Baghdad.
No man can avoid his fate.
That is kismet.
- Break camp.
- Break camp.
Return to the mountains.
Wait for me there.
Pray well, Hajj the Beggar.
Excuse me, which way is Mecca?
Hey, ho. Hey, ho, ho.
Hey, ho.
I'm rich.
I am rich.
On the rim of torture and death
and now, treasure.
Why, I'm the richest man I ever knew.
Today's my day
My day of days
My blessings unfold
In a hundred golden ways
Fate has played the trick with the twine
And woven evil and good in one design
And I can face the sun
No more to dodge, no more to run
I can eat, I can buy
I can sleep in a bed
In the certainty I'm fed and free
For fate has claimed its child
And smiled on me
Make way for the Wazir.
Make way for the Wazir.
Make way for the Wazir.
Clear the bazaar.
Make way for the Wazir.
- Clear the bazaar.
- Clear the bazaar.
- Make way for the Wazir.
- Make way for the Wazir.
- Clear the bazaar.
- Clear the bazaar.
Make way for the Wazir.
Make way for the mighty Wazir
who has eyes in every house.
And hands in every pocket.
Investigate that laughter.
Wife of wives to the Wazir.
Wife of wives to the Wazir.
To the Wazir's wife of wives.
Salaam, Lalume,
possessor of my entire heart.
Happiness attend your return.
Salaam, my exalted husband.
Lalume, I sent you to Ababu
to negotiate a loan. Did you get it or not?
And I had thought your impatience
was for me.
I found a new and wondrous ointment,
feel my skin.
Lalume, without that loan, I perish.
Answer me, do I get it?
All the gold 10 camels can carry.
- Heh-heh. Lalume.
- But there is a condition.
A high marriage
for the three princesses of Ababu.
Oh, what a nuisance.
I don't need any more wives.
In fact,
I've got more than I've any use for.
My lord, no one knows that
better than I.
However, it is not you the sheik of Ababu
wants for a son-in-law.
He wishes his eldest daughter
to become wife of wives to the Caliph.
To the Caliph?
And her two sisters,
second and third wives to the Caliph.
How can I influence the Caliph?
He's too young to understand
an honest bribe.
Nor can I frighten him, not while he keeps
that certainty of divine destiny.
He's shown not the slightest inclination
to marry.
With your wit and enterprise,
you will change his mind.
all the gold 10 camels can carry.
Are they attractive,
these three young women?
Judge for yourself, my lord.
Guards, bring the Ababus.
Exalted Wazir, may I present Their
Royal Highnesses the Princesses of Ababu.
In the name of our illustrious Caliph,
I welcome you to Baghdad.
What they say?
They could not be happy here... matter what their father wants.
- What? Heh-heh. What?
Not happy in Baghdad?
Why, that's impossible.
Well, Baghdad...
Well, it's a symbol of happiness on Earth.
- Fetch me 50 happy people, quickly.
- My lord, it will take a month.
Sacred cats of Nefertiti.
Am I to be balked at every turn?
Will no one cooperate?
Unless I'm served as a Wazir should be...
...I warn you, heads will roll in the dust.
And the streets of Baghdad
will flow with the tears...
Don't underestimate Baghdad
A city rich in romantic oriental lore
You must investigate Baghdad
And learn a few of the facts
You never knew before
Due south of the Garden of Eden
Due north of the Gulf of Aden
Where every male and maiden
Is laden down
With the blisses of Baghdad
This irresistible
When or where
Could you compare high life
To the life you find here
Not since Nineveh, not since Tyre
Not since Babylon turned to mire
For a sin of a kind we never mind here
Where or when ever again low life
Like the life well-known here
Not since Nineveh, not since Sidon
Not since Jericho started slidir
From the din of a horn
That's never blown here
Our palaces are gaudier
Our alleyways are bawdier
Our princes more autocratic here
Our beggars more distinctly aromatic here
Where could you ever pursue your life
With the zeal we feel here?
Not since Babylon read that writing
Not since Jericho heard that trumpet
Not since Nebuchadnezzar's
Hanging garden went to pot
- Not since that village near Gomorrah got
Too hot for Lot
- No, not since Nineveh
Aye, shabash
Not since Nineveh
Ah ah
- Nineveh
Come to Baghdad, live in Baghdad
Life in Baghdad
Takes you back to Nineveh
Stay in Baghdad, stay in Baghdad
Stay in Baghdad, stay in Baghdad
Stay in Baghdad, stay in Baghdad
Stay in Baghdad, stay in Baghdad
When or where
Could you compare high life
To the life you find here
Not since Nineveh, not since Tyre
Not since Babylon turned to mire
For a sin of a kind we never mind here
Where could you ever pursue your life
With the zeal we feel here?
Not since Babylon read that writing
Not since Jericho heard that trumpet, not
Not since
No, no, no, no
Not since Nineveh
Not since
Not since Nineveh, not since Tyre
Not since Babylon turned to mire
Not since Nineveh, not since Sidon
Not since Jericho started slidir
Baghdad is the gayest town
Since Nineveh
Clear the bazaar.
Make way for the Wazir.
Clear the bazaar.
Make way for the Wazir.
Clear the bazaar.
All Highest, pardon thy servant.
I should've prevented this indignity.
- I was stepped upon.
- Oh.
Inconceivable, All Highest, but true.
You were incontrovertibly stepped upon.
But it is written that they who defile
the royal presence will die.
Great ruler, we will all die.
In your words,
there's food for much thought.
Yes, and in my thoughts,
there is much room for food.
Can't we return to the palace now
and have breakfast?
Certainly not.
Now the official year of mourning
for my father is at an end...
...I will assume the official duties.
The Caliph's schedule
has no intermission.
Then, my boy, heh, alter the schedule
with a wave of your hand.
Omar, the duties of royalty are sacred.
My late cousin, Ultimate of Aden...
...strangled to death on a peach pit
rather than interrupt an official function.
In my humble opinion,
your late cousin was a... Was a fool.
There are many things
that only royalty can understand.
Heh-heh-heh. Yes, it must be.
These roaming
roamings in the streets incognito... they serve a purpose?
The Caliph is expected to make incognito
visits among his subjects regularly.
And he shall do so.
May we ask ourselves
what purpose these visits serve?
We may ask ourselves.
- And may we answer ourselves?
- We may.
Abba, to learn the ways of the people.
Babba, to stimulate our local storytellers.
Cabba, to introduce a romantic note
into the dry business of government.
Omar, she is lovely.
My boy, I've never seen that expression
on your face before.
It's sickening.
Slaves for sale.
Gathered from the four corners of the Earth.
Here we have Al Marre of Ankara.
Sold into slavery by her husband.
Come gaze at her. What am I offered?
Gaze at this physique,
this marvelous physique.
Powerful. Does lots of work.
Makes cheese. Milks goats.
Manages estates.
Fifty dinar. Fifty dinar.
Gaze at this magnificent physique.
Fifty dinar.
Gaze at this marvelous musculature.
Here she is. Fifty dinar.
- Omar, she is gone.
- Oh, my boy...
...Caliphs don't chase girls
through the streets.
- Hurry, Omar, hurry.
- Oh, my boy.
Stop that woman.
Stop her. Stop that woman.
Stop the thief. Grab that woman. Grab...
Where are they,
you sticky-fingered street girl?
Where are the oranges you stole?
Rest awhile, father of none
and son of hundreds.
- Rest till I learn if my daughter be harmed.
- It's all right. Let him go.
- Up then, toad.
- I'll have you jailed for this.
I'll have every last dinar and... It's the... I...
Come on, Father,
before he summons the police.
Marsinah, we don't run away
from the police. Not anymore.
Why not?
Because of what I hold behind my back.
- What?
- What does it sound like?
- Not copper pieces.
- Not copper pieces.
Suppose you could have anything
you ever wanted. What would you wish for?
- Breakfast.
- Oh, my dear child.
Let us have some breadth of vision.
Think big. Very big.
- The other half of the blanket.
- The other half... Oh!
We could buy
the other half of the blanket.
Good merchants,
set forth your silks and jewels...
...your finest garments
and sweetest perfumes.
- My daughter will purchase only the best.
Who is this happy mad man?
Those who are slow to serve us...
...will naturally be the last
to receive our custom.
- It's gold. Gold.
- Gold.
Put it back where you got it.
Never fear, child.
It is honestly got, honestly got.
Oh, Father, I'm afraid.
Sweet Marsinah,
our frightened days are behind us.
Try to understand. We are rich.
You know the house
out near the pomegranate grove?
You mean the one I've always dreamed
we might someday...?
- We're that rich?
- Yes. Yes, my darling.
If it is still for sale, we can buy it.
But keep some of the money for yourself.
You talk only of things for me.
What does a poet need?
What can rival the beautiful things
that he invents in his head?
I have girls.
Able bodied slaves for sale or for rent.
Gathered from the four corners
of the Earth.
Able-bodied slaves for sale or for rent.
Gathered from the four corners of the earth.
One hundred dinar.
- Well, come to think of it.
- Think of what?
Well, you should have
maids and attendants now.
Fitting for a lady in your position.
Don't you think so?
- I wouldn't know what to do with them.
- Don't worry about that.
I'll get three or four.
No sense in being short-handed.
So many beautiful things.
What shall I buy?
Baubles, bangles and beads
Marsinah, buy from me
Marsinah, buy from me
Marsinah, lovely
Marsinah, Marsinah, buy
Worms work on a Chinese terrace
Worms dream of a happy heiress
Wearing their wares
Answer their prayers
Baubles, bangles and beads
Baubles, bangles
Hear how they jing, jing-a-ling-a
Baubles, bangles, bright shiny beads
Marsinah, buy from me
Marsinah, lovely
Marsinah, Marsinah, buy
Think upon the Macedonian oyster
Having indigestion in his watery cloister
So that Marsinah could have a pearl
- A pearl
- Baubles, bangles and beads
Baubles, bangles
Hear how they jing, jing-a-ling-a
Baubles, bangles, bright shiny beads
Sparkles, spangles
My heart will sing, sing-a-ling-a
Wearing baubles, bangles
And beads
I'll glitter and gleam so
Make somebody dream
So that someday he may
Buy me a ring, ring-a-ling-a
I've heard that's where it leads
Wearing baubles
And beads
Baubles, bangles
Hear how they jing, jing-a-ling-a
Baubles, bangles, bright shiny beads
Sparkles, spangles
My heart will sing, sing-a-ling-a
Wearing baubles, bangles and beads
I'll glitter and gleam so
Make somebody dream
So that someday he may
- Buy me a ring, ring-a-ling-a
I've heard that's where it leads
That's where it leads
Wearing amulets, necklaces
Stars in one's hair
Wearing baubles
And beads
Baubles, bangles and beads
Oh. Ladies.
Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
I feel that I'm wearying you.
Please rest a while.
Oh, thank you, master.
Frankly, I've never owned slaves before.
I'm a bit vague
as to what your rights are.
We have none, master.
Your word is our law.
Well, then we certainly won't have
any trouble getting along, huh?
- You are sweet, master.
Oh, yes, you are.
Master, if I werert a slave,
I'd kiss you.
Oh, my dear child, feel free
to express your gratitude at all times.
One thing I will not have around the house
is class distinction.
- The Wazir's police.
- Oh!
Oh. Be not alarmed.
These fine constables can want nothing
from honest, well-to-do citizens.
- Nothing but your name, good sir.
- My name? Why, my name is...
Why do you ask?
Jawan the Brigand was recognized
in the bazaar this morning.
- I don't suppose you've seen him?
- Oh, no.
Very well. Name and place of residence?
Uh... Officer, I wonder if we couldn't
save ourselves much inconvenience.
I wonder if one piece of gold
would serve to identify me suffic...
- Not the whole thing.
- Do you admit possession?
Officer, let there be no misunderstanding.
That is my purse.
And it bears on it the sign
of the House of Achmed. Seize him.
- Sign of what?
- The House of Achmed...
...looted by thieves this last moon.
You, return these creatures
to the slave mongers.
Add the money to the evidence
against this thief. Take him to the Wazir.
The Wazir.
- Ah!
- Please don't scream.
Heh. Why should I scream?
I followed you from the bazaar.
Are you accustomed
to having men follow you?
Yes. Sometimes at great speed.
It is not fitting for you
to answer that way.
You should have said, "No. "
I think you have no humor.
I had an uncle who laughed sometimes.
- Who are you?
- You may call me Haroun.
Oh, of course, I may.
I may call you Mameluke ben Goathead,
but who are you?
Please, I don't wish to say just yet.
You're a criminal.
No, not a criminal.
At least, not in his eyes.
Not in whose eyes?
Mmm. Splendid reference.
Do you have any others? More local.
I'm afraid not. I am a stranger here.
Oh, not anymore, I hope.
Yes, I know.
That is not a fitting thing to say.
You are...
...very beautiful.
Probably it's just my pretty clothes
that attract you.
Having my hair combed...
...and my face washed.
Yes, that would make a difference.
Oh, I like you, stranger.
What is your business?
Your family's business?
We, uh...
- We try to make things grow.
- Oh.
Gardener, I do not think this is fitting.
No man has ever touched me before.
And no other man ever shall.
It is his will.
I do not belong to you.
This time I'm speaking of Allah's will.
You are too confusing for me.
Please, take your hand away.
I cannot.
Oh, why do the leaves
Of the mulberry tree
Whisper differently now
And why is the nightingale
Singing at noon
On the mulberry bough
For some most mysterious reason
This isn't the garden I know
No, it's paradise now
That was only a garden
A moment ago
Take my hand
I'm a stranger in paradise
All lost in a wonderland
A stranger in paradise
If I stand starry-eyed
That's a danger in paradise
For mortals who stand beside
An angel like you
I saw your face
And I ascended
Out of the commonplace into the rare
Somewhere in space
I hang suspended
Until I know
There's a chance
That you care
Wort you answer the fervent prayer
Of a stranger in paradise
Don't send me in dark despair
From all that I hunger for
But open your angel's arms
To the stranger in paradise
And tell him
That he need be
A stranger
No more
You say you're a gardener.
What flowers should I plant
along the fence?
I must go in a moment.
Will you meet me here this evening?
I thought hyacinths,
but perhaps oleanders.
At moonrise? Here in the garden? Please.
Yes, of course.
- Until tonight.
- Tonight.
You won't forget? You won't fail me?
I saw your face
And I ascended
Out of the commonplace
Into the rare
Somewhere in space
I hang suspended
Until I know
Till the moment I know
There's a chance that you care
There's a chance that you care
Wort you answer the fervent prayer
Of a stranger in paradise
Don't send me in dark despair
From all that I hunger for
But open your angel's arms
To the stranger in paradise
And tell me that I need be
A stranger
No more
Bow low for the mighty Wazir.
Bow low for the mighty Wazir.
Silence then obedience.
The court of justice convenes.
The court begins its meditations.
"The case of the seller of candlesticks,
Ibn Nuwas...
...charged with breaking the pottery pots
of Ali Dah doud. "
Illustrious Wazir, Ibn Nuwas pleads
for a postponement of judgment...
...until his broken legs are mended.
He fell from a cushion
while being questioned.
Next case.
Great Wazir,
we have apprehended a thief...
...with a hundred pieces of gold
taken from the house of Achmed.
Let him appear.
Oh. At last, good fortune returns to me.
Good fortune?
The noble Wazir himself,
sitting in judgment.
Who could ask for a more righteous,
a fairer, a finer judge?
I loathe fawning criminals.
- He doesn't talk like a thief.
Let your loveliness be the loot,
O princess...
...and every man is a thief.
Oh, let him chatter a bit.
- The evidence against this criminal is as fo...
- I need no evidence.
Under the laws of Baghdad...
...I order that the right hand
of this liar, rogue and thief be cut off.
Have you aught to say
before sentence is executed?
Well, that I am a liar,
I am not a big enough liar to deny.
That I am a rogue can be verified
by anyone who knows me.
And that I am a thief is as true
as if it were written in the Koran.
But, in this particular case...
...I say, for the first time in my life,
I am innocent.
I dislike being mocked in public.
Add 20 lashes to my sentence.
Are you done with your protest?
It is rather expensive,
but I should like to continue.
I can understand your indifference
that I am innocent...
...O dispenser of justice.
I, the pick purse, the brawler,
the collector of women, innocent?
I can hardly believe my own ears.
Tell me, what sort of women
did you prey upon?
Till I beheld you, O princess... memory of them
was that they were all beautiful.
Oh! It's his tongue
that should be cut off.
But let the sentence stand.
Right hand off.
Oh, noble Wazir.
I assure you that I despise innocence
as much as you.
It is at best a temporary state.
- What are you bothering me about?
- The small matter of losing my right hand.
As a poet and storyteller,
the loss would cripple my career.
- Scoundrel. I'm leaving you your mouth.
- Hold.
For that simple sentence,
you needed your hand.
It is the gesture which tells the story.
Let me convince you.
Oh, let him.
I love being convinced.
Dear hand, deft hand
Clever and facile extremity
Fond companion to me
From my birth
Sweet hand, swift hand
Spinner of fable and fantasy
Faithful friend of my art
Would they rend us apart
Leaving no finger or fist there
But just the hint of a wrist there
Where then my spirited wit
My mercurial charm
Am I fated to sit
With an elbow and arm
And no digits to top them off
If they lop them off
How could I plead to you?
How could I pray to you?
How intercede with you?
What could I say to you?
Like a dog with no tail
Like a spoutless whale
Like an elephant sunk
If you cut off his trunk
I'd like to hear a little more
When you tell a story
Amorous or gory
You can tell it best
If you gesticulate
Suppose the mighty Sinbad
Meets a jinn who's been bad
They will guess the rest
If you gesticulate
A tongue is a tongue
A lung is a lung
And a tale you can shout or sing
Without the gesture, nothing
Should Scheherazade
Undulate her body
That can be expressed if you ges...
Can be assessed if you ges...
She'll be undressed
If you gesticulate
If I tell you I was walking by the sea
And found a genie in a bottle
- That's trite
For practically everyone has seen a genie
Someone had to throttle
In a bottle
Right, but if I say the bottle
Was so teeny
So teeny
And so was the genie
So was the genie
Until with trembling hand
I pulled the cork
And threw the jug
And covered up my eyes
And the smoke began to curl
And the smoke began to swirl
And it swirled and it curled
And it curled and it swirled
As higher it did rise
Till it was so high
So high
And so was the genie
So was the genie
- Then two great arms reached down
Two great arms
- And lifted me up
- Up, up
Up, up
- Into the sky
So high, so high
And we did fly
And he did fly
The genie and I
How he did fly
- We did sail
- Did sail
- Did sail
- Did sail
Is this a tale?
This is a tale
- Are you convinced?
- We are convinced
You see
You see
For the facile finger
Listeners will linger
They will be impressed if you ges-
Applaud with zest if you ges...
If it's a question of a story, gory
Sinbad, in bed
Bottle, smoke, genie, arms
Fly, sky, high, I state
With your hands
With your hands
Rather clever, you must admit.
Too clever. Much too clever
for an ordinary sort of thief.
I'm sure he's stolen
more than a hundred pieces of gold.
Where have you hidden the money?
Believe me, great sir,
I have stolen nothing.
Both hands off for that lie.
What money I have was given me
for removing a curse from a mars head.
Oh, you presume to have power
over curses?
The power of prayer is infinite, Great Wazir.
And I pray exceedingly well.
Send men to his home.
Bring me who you find.
- All his confederates.
- No.
No, there is no one in my home,
no one at all.
Only a wretched, half-mad daughter,
ugly, cackle-voiced.
Please, she had done no wrong.
Oh, we've touched a sore spot.
We're on the trail now. Go, hurry
Yes, Great Wazir. Where do you live?
You refuse to answer?
You dare to refuse to answer?
May Allah curse you.
May calamity strike you.
May disaster overwhelm you.
May you be driven from this palace,
kicked into the road.
A curse on your head.
A curse on the head
of the Wazir of Police. Ah. Aah!
Exalted Wazir.
- Exalted Wazir, we have captured Jawan.
Let me go.
Let me go. Let me go.
There he is. The cheat.
The pretender of powers.
Let me tear out his liver.
Let me rip his belly to ribbons.
He removed a curse from me
for 100 pieces of gold.
And he swore I'd find my son
before this day was over.
Where, you dog of a thief,
where is my son?
Oh, mighty Wazir,
have your men release me.
Allah be praised. Allah is merciful.
And Mohammed is his prophet.
That amulet around your neck.
Oh, mighty Wazir,
answer an old man one question.
Where did you get it?
This amulet's been with me
since childhood.
At last I have found you.
Ali, my little Ali.
What does this mean?
I am your father.
Oh, Ali, the light of my soul.
I put that amulet around your neck
one week before you were kidnapped.
Here's the other piece.
See how they match.
Why, they fit perfectly.
Yes, of course.
Oh, forgive my taunts, Hajj the Beggar,
forgive me.
Allah be praised.
A man with the power to curse
and uncurse. A magician-beggar.
Oh, speak to me, speak to me.
My father's heart aches
for one word from its son.
I'll attend to you in a moment.
Oh! What a glorious end
to all of my search. Oh.
Speak to me, speak to me.
You are Jawan, the robber and murderer.
Is that true?
Yes, I'm too overcome
to say much more.
You said enough. You've confessed
to being a criminal of the worst sort.
Take him to the dungeons
and dispose of him.
But I am your father.
All the more reason to be rid of you.
For the leading judge of Mesopotamia... have as a father the leading criminal
of Mesopotamia, a disturbing thought.
Oh, let me something other from
my sors lips than a sentence to death.
- To the dungeons with him.
- Oh, but my Ali. Just to be near my Ali.
My baby, my little baby.
Ali, Ali, the light of my life, my soul.
My sun, my stars, the moon.
Never have I seen
a more touching reconciliation.
- We can use this man.
- Yes.
Yes, I rather think so.
Have the kindness
to have your menials release me.
Oh. Yeah, you heard him,
release him. Heh.
Wait, oh, what an idiot I am.
Did you not place a curse upon my head?
With all the venom you could summon?
What became of that curse?
What became of that curse?
Let all mouths close but mine.
Let all mouths close but mine.
The holy, the good, the wise,
the just, the omnipotent...
...the commander of the faithful.
Nenone al Raschid Ben Mohammet
ibn Khasimoun...
...the Caliph.
Arise, my subjects. Arise and rejoice.
Even the walls of my chambers
rejoice at Your Highness' presence.
Your Caliph rejoices
at the tidings he brings.
He is pleased to notify his Wazir
that he has chosen a bride.
See that the proper proclamations
are made.
Tell the foreign embassies
all candidates for the Caliph's hand...
...should return to their homes.
May every citizen
share his Caliph's happiness.
Ruined, hopelessly,
utterly, gracelessly ruined.
Who could have put this wicked spell
upon me? Who?
- The beggar.
- You sent for me?
You. It was you who did this.
Reverse my decision in the case
of Hajj the Beggar. Magician.
- Restore all his gold to him.
- Yes, Great Wazir.
Now, let's come to terms quickly.
How much to lift that curse of yours?
Forgive me, but I can do no more today.
Consider what I've already done.
Suppose we should raise you
to the rank of emir?
Emir? Me? An emir?
an emir is second only to me.
Don't haggle with the wizard.
He may take offense and turn you
into something worse than you are.
My daughter and I...
...members of the nobility.
But only if you undo the harm you've
caused and prevent the Caliph's marriage.
Prevent the Caliph's marriage?
Oh-ho-ho, but you are too kind.
It is overwhelming. What a day.
But how could one possibly refuse
such an offer?
And how can one possibly accept it?
Don't tell me you doubt your power.
Indeed I do.
As a matter of fact, each time it functions,
I am more and more astonished.
Still it does function. We've seen it.
Yes, it does, doesn't it?
- Noble Wazir, I accept your offer.
- Done.
Great Wazir.
- Yes?
- Shall we dismiss the court?
- No, I feel good.
I'll sentence the rest of the criminals
before my nap.
Come here.
You know when really angered at someone,
my husband usually drops him alive...
...from a high battlement
onto a long hook.
Thus will you be impaled
when he discovers you're a fraud.
Then, may I make a suggestion?
Let's not tell him.
He doesn't need to be told.
He'll know the moment
the Caliph marries.
That is why I hesitated
before accepting his offer.
But, well, love is an uncertain business.
And if lover's quarrel,
as young lovers often do, then I'm an emir.
If not, well, that is kismet.
You'd gamble your life
on such a slim chance?
Princess, I have risked floggings
for a handful of dates.
I envy you.
Every moment an adventure.
A life totally without monotony.
Yes. That you can say for it.
Since my so-called marriage to the Wazir,
I have waked each morning...
...with the chart of my day
staring down at me from the ceiling.
The path of every hour already mapped.
And the map of each hour the same.
Have you ever known that torment?
It is one of the few I have been spared.
You are fortunate.
Afternoons dull
Mornings duller
Duller the nights before
Suddenly you
Suddenly color
I suddenly see
Monotony for me
Will be no more
Bored by the night and the day was I
Seldom gay was I
Before now
In a world without you was I
And I was bored
So bored
Then came your eyes compelling me
Telling me something wild
On your lips lay adventure
And lightning flashed
When you smiled
So smile now
Wake the fires that sleep in me
Make them leap in me
With your kiss
And whatever it is I'll be
I won't be bored
Not bored
Bedeviled, yes
Bedazzled, yes
Bewildered and breathless, yes
But not bored
How could I ever be bored
Not with your lips on mine
Your magical lips
Pressed on mine
Not bored
I will never again
Be bored
What kind of a sentence did he get?
Your gold.
The Caliph's trumpeters.
Look, they're beautiful.
Silence, you fools.
Silence, you caterwauling trulls.
Well, beggar,
why do you not begin your magic?
Could it be that our great wizard
does not know what the music means?
The Caliph is on his way
to fetch his bride.
What? Are you certain?
Why are you disturbed?
Did you not promise
to stop this wedding?
Great sir, as I've already told you,
I've exhausted today's rations of powers.
- I couldn't possibly...
- I see. Guard.
Guards, draw swords.
Guards, this reluctant magician... not to leave the palace
under any circumstances.
He has a tremendous spell to weave,
in which I'm sure he will not fail.
However, should he fail...
- Executioner.
- Executioner forward.
Executioner, prepare the room
of the 29 fires.
Watch him carefully, he's slippery.
But I suspect that he is not fireproof.
- What are you doing?
- Shh!
I'm calling on my powers.
Assist me, all of you.
Oh, powers above and powers below.
Ye who weaves
at your tanglesome skeins...
...and daily spins the tapestry
of agony and joy...
...that mortals call the history of man...
...cup thy ear to Hajj the Beggar.
Aye, shabash.
Goat of Mendes.
Blight and blast our Caliph's love.
Twice this day hast thou seen
fit to grant what I ween.
Twice this day has thou let...
...Hajj's humble prayer
climb up heavers stair.
And kismet so ordained.
My goal should be attained.
Another prayer, another cry.
Grant again, grant it,
I ask thee now, ask thee now.
Kismet, mystery of fate.
Heed me as I lower my knee
A beggar begging your ear
To hear his plea
Fate, let the sound of my voice beguile
Look with love on your slave below
And show your smile
'Tis but a trifle I ask
That in the master design
Which you have written and sealed
You change one line
This love that mustrt be
This he, this she
Turn her smile into scorn
Turn his heart into stone
- Turn the honey on their lips to brine
Then fate
The day is mine
Play on the cymbal
The timbal, the lyre
Play with appropriate passion
Fashion songs
of delight and delicious desire
For the night of my nights
Come where the so well-beloved
Is waiting
Where the rose and the jasmine mingle
While I tell her the moon is for mating
And 'tis sin to be single
Let peacocks and monkeys
In purple adornings
Show her the way
To my bridal chamber
Then get you gone
Till the morn of my mornings
After the night of my nights
After the night of my nights
'Tis the night of my nights
Play on the cymbal
The timbal, the lyre
Play with appropriate passion
Fashion songs
Of delight and delicious desire
For the night of my nights
Come where the so well-beloved
Is waiting
Where the rose and the jasmine mingle
While I tell her the moon is for mating
And 'tis sin to be single
Let peacocks and monkeys
In purple adornings
Show her the way to my bridal chamber
Then get you gone till the morn
Of my mornings
After the night of my nights
'Tis the night of my nights
After the night of my nights
'Tis the night of my nights
- Oh, Marsinah.
Thank heavens I found you.
I've looked everywhere for you.
I can't explain now.
- But we have to make a trip to Damascus.
- Damascus?
Oh, my poor father.
Some angry husband again?
Oh, no, it's much worse than that.
I'm in great danger of the Wazir.
His police may be here at any moment.
- The Wazir?
- Yes, Marsinah, I can't explain now.
- Look I'll tell you all about it as we go.
- Oh.
Father, Father, I can't leave now.
But this is a matter of life or death.
But I was to meet someone here.
To the bride of the Caliph. Ha-ha.
To the second and third
and future wives...
...the All Highest will take
now that he has a first wife.
And to the silks he shall buy her.
And the satins and the jewels.
- Gentlemen, to polygamy.
To polygamy.
So you see, instead of becoming an emir,
I have incurred the wrath of the Wazir.
- Do you understand now why we must flee?
- Yes, I understand.
Help me saddle this beast and we'll get
out of here. I'll leave a fair price for him.
Out of the way.
Get out of the way.
- Look.
- Where is Hassan?
Procession is returning
without the bride.
Can't be true.
Why would any woman run from the Caliph?
- She just wasrt there.
- News will be all over Baghdad by morning.
Did you hear?
It isn't true. It can't be.
On the contrary, it must be.
Father, you frighten me.
What are you going to do?
Return to the palace
and become an emir.
- No.
- But Marsinah.
- No, I won't let you.
- But, Marsinah.
You're not going to put yourself
into the clutches of that butcher.
- Marsinah.
- You're no more of a magician...
...than he is. Than that camel is.
Marsinah. Now, listen,
you must wait here.
If I have not returned before dawn,
you go swiftly and secretly to Damascus.
Here's what's left of our gold.
Ample to buy your living for years.
Keep 10 gold pieces so that you can have
a dowry and marry a man of substance.
And keep still another 10 in case
that your husband should be mean or cruel.
You give me this...
...instead of my father.
Marsinah, when a mars fortune
is on the rise...
...he knows it beyond logic,
beyond reason.
Trust me as you always have.
- But I'm content the way we are.
- And?
We have more than enough money
to satisfy us.
Only a fool would risk his neck for more.
No, Marsinah, come here.
A fool sat beneath an olive tree
And a wondrous thought had he
So he rose and he told it to the sky
And where was I?
Behind the tree I overheard
His reverie
Why be content with an olive
When you could have the tree?
Why be content to be nothing
When there's nothing you couldn't be?
Why be contented with one olive tree
When you could have
The whole olive grove?
Why be content with a grove
When you could have the world?
The fool stood beneath the olive tree
"What a wondrous thought," said he
But alas, it is very, very deep
And so he yawned and went to sleep
Because, you see
He was a fool
Why be content with an olive
When you could have the tree?
That which has lulled you to sleep, fool
Has awakened me
Why should I sigh that my lot is my lot
That I can't make it anything more
When that is a lie
An excuse for a fool to snore
I walked
From behind the olive tree
With a wondrous change in me
For I walked with my eye upon a star
If you have heard and do not heed
There is a word
For what you are
And, oh, my friend
The word is
Bow low for the Mighty Wazir.
- Lalume.
My lord?
Lalume, he's succeeded.
Our wizard has succeeded.
I'm not surprised, are you?
I am flooded with relief.
Had the Caliph
married that backyard bride...
...why, I truly believe
I'd have had to kill myself.
My dear husband,
you will never have to kill yourself.
Now, where is he now, do you suppose?
I shall have to destroy him
as soon as possible.
Destroy him? Why?
A man who's abetted me in
a treasonable act, knowing what he knows,
how could I let him live?
Of course.
But what a pity though.
Think of the power
you are throwing away.
Imagine the Wazir of police
with a wizard in his employ.
Power within power.
- Yes.
- You could change the face of Baghdad.
All Persia.
All Arabia might be yours.
Oh, wise, Lalume.
We must befriend him.
Make him a permanent guest in our home.
Then persuade him
to put his talents to our use.
But perhaps he won't return.
- Perhaps he...
- He will return.
- How can you be sure?
- You'd just be angry if I told you.
- Oh, nevertheless, I wish he would... Oh!
- Your wish is my command.
Oh. Greetings, great wizard. Heh.
Well done. Excellently done.
I thank you.
Oh, your patent of nobility
awaits only your signature.
Your coronet,
I shall bring with my own hands.
Oh, inform the harem to entertain
my magical guest.
To delight him continuously.
Feed him sweetmeats and watermelons.
Feed him rahadlakum.
It shall be done, my lord.
- Rahadlakum?
- An ecstasy of taste.
A delight that will steal your brain away.
Well, some other time, perhaps.
Without my brains, I am defenseless.
What's wrong?
- Ahem.
You are hostile.
Great Lady, I have but one goal.
To take my coronet of office...
...collect my grant from the Caliph's
treasury and live in well-fed obscurity.
I want you to remain here.
In what capacity?
Your fullest.
- Lalume.
- Hmm?
You have saved my life and befriended me.
And I'm grateful.
But you know me as I know you.
We are practical people
who live by real values in Allah's name.
- Let's not try to fool each other.
- I'm not trying to fool you.
- Not at all.
- But I have a daughter. I can't desert her.
Your daughter would be as safe here
as you.
- Safer.
- Yet, I'm no magician.
How long do you think I could live
under the Wazir's roof before he found out?
About 30 years.
- The Emir Hajj commands you.
- Uh...
Go to the camel stables
hard by the street of the vendors.
You'll find a young lady there
who'll answer to the name of Marsinah.
- You fetch her to me.
- Immediately, Emir Hajj.
Emir Hajj.
Can it really be?
- Come with me.
- Where?
- To the harem.
- Must I?
Pretty poet. I would like the Wazir
to believe it was his harem...
...that enticed you to remain here.
It would simplify our lives.
I understand.
On days when my lord groweth restless
And bored with his sword and his plume
His handmaiden hath what he needeth
And what doth he need
On nights when my lord looketh listless
And black is the hue of his gloom
His handmaiden hath what he lacketh
And what doth he lack
'Tis sweet with the meat of the litchi nut
Combined with the kumquat rind
The kind of confection
To drive a man
Out of his Mesopotamian mind
And lo, if my lord feeleth faithless
And roameth by night from his room
His handmaiden fanneth her fires
And out of her pan
Riseth a tantalizing perfume
He scenteth the scent
He turneth his face
His previous place in her embrace
He doth resume
And love is in bloom
The while they consume
- Rahad
- Rahad
Oh, gracious emir...
...everyone marvels at your wizardry.
May an humble servant
plead the benefit of your magic?
He may.
My third wife is soon to spawn a child.
I now have seven daughters.
Will the gracious emir this time
grant me a boy?
My good man,
this assurance I can give you.
If it is not a boy,
it will not be my fault.
Thank you.
Thank you.
You know,
I wouldn't be surprised if he did have a boy.
After all, didn't the Caliph's commoner
disappear as I guaranteed?
Did not Jawan find his son?
Could it possibly be
that I actually do possess the power?
Ahem. Allah, this is me again.
Restore my missing tooth.
No magician.
Just an ordinary man.
Far from ordinary.
Lalume, why don't you answer?
Where's Hajj?
Oh, bother, he's disappeared again.
- Ah.
- Gah!
My coronet.
Where were you this time?
That would be hard to explain
to a layman.
Your Emirship.
Your Emirship.
I thank you.
- How do I look?
- Ooh, heh-heh. Magnificent.
Does he give you
a kind of creepy feeling?
Do you mean a sort of
tingly sensation under the skin?
- Yeah.
- He certainly does.
Perhaps now you'll remain here
as our guest.
Magician though I may be,
I am unable to tear myself away.
All Persia, all Arabia, all Mesopotamia...
Great Wazir?
- Great Wazir, a summons from the Caliph.
- Hmm.
Call my litter.
Enjoy yourself, friend. I shart be long.
Now, let's see, where were we?
About here, I think.
Oh, I'm being foolish. Not now, not here.
But when, Lalume? And where, Lalume?
And in heavers name,
how soon can we be there, Lalume?
I have heard of an oasis in the desert,
about a week's journey by dromedary.
- Not that I've ever been there.
- Of course not.
It is called
the Oasis of Delightful Imaginings.
No one around for miles and miles.
The sound of palm trees
rustling in the distance.
Warm desert winds caressing your skin.
Glorious emir.
- Yes.
- The lady has been brought as commanded.
- Oh, Father, you're safe.
- Yes, of course.
I was so worried about you,
with you here in that butcher's clutches.
Eh-eh-eh... Marsinah,
may I present the butcher's wife?
My daughter, Marsinah.
- Forgive me, great lady.
- Uh...
Notice anything, Marsinah? Ahem.
- An emir. You really are.
- Yes.
She must have gowns and silks
befitting her station.
My dressmaker will prepare a selection
for your choice.
Thank you.
- Father, can we leave this place now?
- Hmm?
I didn't want to ask
while she was still here, but please.
You have your emirship.
Isn't that enough?
Please, let us leave
and buy our pretty house.
But you prefer a house to a palace?
I tried to tell you before.
- I have fallen in love.
- Oh.
It was there that I met him.
Maybe he'll come back.
At a time like this,
you talk of infantile infatuation.
It's love, Father.
It is real and deep
as the one I feel for you.
Please forgive me. L...
I didn't realize.
I'll never find him again.
There's no way. L...
- I don't even know his name.
- Darling.
- Where he lives, nothing.
- Darling, please. Please don't cry.
We'll find him.
Now, what's he like, huh?
Can you describe him?
Wazir, all your men, your entire force... to be set upon the task
of finding a certain young woman.
Your Caliph has already described her
to his councilors who will assist you.
Start the search immediately.
Immediately, highness.
A gardener? Hmm.
Well, tell me a little more about him.
Is he a tall gardener?
Short gardener?
I don't know anything else.
Well, now, come, let's have some facts.
Were his eyes gray?
His eyes were...
Oh, Father,
we talked only for a few moments.
He touched my hand.
You'd say his eyes were
Sometime bright
But only sometime
Often dark
Well, that is plain
Plain words can't tell the thrill
Then tell it how you will
Dawrs promising skies
Petals on a pool drifting
Imagine these
In one pair of eyes
And this is my beloved
Strange spice from the south
Honey through the comb sifting
Imagine these
On one eager mouth
And this is my beloved
And when she speaks
And when she talks to me
And when she moves
And when she walks with me
Comes suddenly near
All that can stir
All that can stun
All that's for the heart's lifting
Imagine these
In one perfect one
And this is my beloved
And this is my beloved
Wazir, why have I had no tidings?
All Highest,
the search is barely under way.
We have so little information
to start with.
You mean you have nothing to report?
Nothing at all?
Great ruler, I need time.
True, Wazir, true.
But a royal marriage has been promised
the people.
And a royal marriage
must be given them.
Exactly the point I was about to make.
You were?
Permit me to observe the illusion
that you can be happy with one woman...'s a phase man goes through.
If Your Highness would glance
into my harem... wives are entertaining
three ravishing young guests.
I am not in the mood, Wazir,
for visiting other mers harems.
Not a visit, highness, a glance.
I have secret means of watching.
It's a small device from which I've derived
a great deal of innocent amusement.
The simple creatures do not know
they're being observed.
They are the princesses of Ababu.
Note their charms.
Consider that an alliance with them
would mean a safe northern frontier.
I do not require your advice
on military security.
But if you would look again, highness,
it is not military security I'm offering.
It is she.
It is.
Here in your harem.
My boy. My poor boy.
But this is impossible. Impossible.
Your Highness... marries so many people.
Of course, she cannot now
become your wife.
But if you'd care to have her as
a concubine, with my compliments.
No, Wazir.
It was not a concubine I sought.
But I don't understand.
A harem wife to the Wazir of police
walking alone in the bazaar?
How is it possible?
She must have bribed the guard.
You. Get me the facts.
Yes, Excellency.
I pray Your Highness does not
blame me for his disappointment.
The incident is closed.
I shall hold a diwan this very night.
You may present your three princesses
of wherever it is.
Inform marriage missions
from other nations... present their candidates
for the Caliph's hand.
This night will he choose
a wife of wives.
Well, where'd she come from?
The new emir brought her.
Oh, my brilliant magician.
He transferred the woman
to my own harem.
His power is unbounded
and therefore so is mine.
Bring me the girl.
Put her over there.
The Caliph believes this woman
to be one of my wives.
I would not have him discover me
in a lie.
Ah. Witness this ceremony and enter it
into the records as of a month ago.
Empowered as judge of Baghdad
to create and cause marriage...
...between two true believers...
...I officially accept this creature as wife
of the 7th rank. Therefore, be she mine.
- What is your name, woman?
- Marsinah.
What has happened?
- Marsinah, the Wazir has taken you
as a wife of the 7th rank.
Have her scrubbed and anointed.
I shall visit her
after the Caliph's diwan tonight.
If you do, I'll kill myself. I swear it.
Really? Oh, this may be
the first interesting wedding night...
...I've had in years. Hmm.
Inform the embassies to present
their candidates for royal marriage... the diwan tonight.
Excellency, you dare not take that risk.
Suppose the All Highest
chooses the wrong bride?
I'm taking no risk at all.
My magician shall officiate
at the ceremony.
All Highest, the emir of whom I told you.
Let the diwan begin.
Oh, Prince of True Believers,
first of the enchanting maidens...
...who aspire to the incredible honor
of becoming your wife.
The beauteous Zubbediya of Damascus.
Sire, perhaps your guards
should advance a pace.
Why so?
- Princess Zubbediya is charm incarnate.
One cannot forget that Damascus
is a province famous only for the fact...
...that your great grandfather
was assassinated there.
O commander of the faithful,
a second contestant for your noble heart.
Samaris of Bangalore.
Alluring as the mirage,
pulsing as the sirocco.
And agile as the mongoose.
And now..., Great Caliph,
the three princesses of Ababu.
O imperishable ruler,
it is said in the Koran...
...that he who looks out of three windows
sees more than one olive tree.
So devoutly do these princesses
desire your happiness...
...that they have put aside
the natural rivalry of womankind.
And each is prepared to marry
that third of you, which she can serve best.
Ah. The delight in your eyes
shows your decision.
O fount of wisdom,
all Baghdad will rejoice...
...and all Ababu as well.
Your Caliph has made no decision.
You have your curses ready
in case he chooses Samaris or Zubbediya?
As ready as ever, Great Wazir.
You know, I'm consumed with curiosity
as to what trick you would use.
- Couldrt possibly give me just a hint?
- No, I...
All right, I understand. Forgive me.
- Secrets of the trade.
- Hmm.
Oh. Oh-ho, by the way...
...that was an ingenious feat
of magic you performed today.
Oh. Transferring the Caliph's beloved
to my harem.
- Oh, oh. Just routine wizardry.
- Wonderful. Heh-heh.
But you should have told me.
I thought all was lost
when the Caliph saw her this evening. Heh.
I told him that she was one of my wives.
- A jeweled brain.
- Heh-heh.
And then, just to protect myself,
I married her.
She swore she'd kill herself.
Angry little thing.
Can't understand what attracted the Caliph.
What's her name?
Marsinah. That's it, Marsinah.
- No.
- Yes, yes, Marsinah.
In Allah's name, what have I done?
Oh, that's all right.
She won't be a danger to us for long.
In fact, she'll cease to exist very soon
after I get down to my palace tonight.
Oh, look at him, descendant of Mohammed,
outwitted by an ordinary mortal.
A knife.
The trick has something to do with a knife.
I have written the name of Ababu upon it.
Hide it in your boot.
- My boot?
- Quickly or you'll spoil the trick.
My boot. Ha-ha.
Mighty Caliph, behold.
What have you there?
A blade of virgin iron, All Highest.
As you can see...
...nothing is written upon it.
My lords, ladies.
I throw it thus into the pool.
When retrieved from the water...
...the magic blade will be inscribed
with the name of our Caliph's bride-to-be.
Noble Caliph, lest you suspect fraud...
...your loyal Wazir himself
will retrieve it from the bottom of the pool.
- Who? Me?
The Wazir?
Only he can serve the end I have in mind.
Wazir, explain this fellow's arrogance.
He is a man of wondrous magic,
Your Highness.
The most potent of wizards.
- Proceed.
- Your indulgence, All Highest.
Too much light quarrels with my art.
May they smother all the torches
but this one?
This trick may take a little while.
O most tender of lords.
All the way to the bottom,
my brilliant assistant.
Have no fear. I am here to help you.
Your foot. Give me your foot.
My foot?
Uh... Heh.
This feat, if you trouble to try,
will help you to understand...
...the infinite slowness of eye
compared to the speed of hand.
He seems to be struggling.
If I didn't know that he was a magician,
I'd swear the man was drowning.
Yes, he struggles well, doesn't he?
All part of the illusion, of course.
Let me assure you,
he is doing exactly what I wish him to do.
Gentle ruler, be not angry when I say...
...your subjects have been told
your heart is broken.
Perhaps your heart has died.
What judgment would you pass if your love
were lost because a lie spoken?
- What judgment upon the man who lied?
- Why do you ask? Whom do you accuse?
A lover of torture, a drinker of tears,
who laughs aloud when the innocent weep.
And to all beseechments
turns stone-deaf ears.
Who is this man? Name me his name?
A bargain, great Caliph.
Name me his sentence first.
His death,
without delay and without mercy.
I thank you for your verdict.
It has been carried out.
The Wazir. Rescue the Wazir.
Guards. After the assassin.
Don't let him escape.
Has my physician been summoned?
Here, All Highest.
Come back.
- Where's the assassin?
- This way.
Find the traitor.
Here we are. Let's go.
Does he live?
His heart is quite still.
I hear a beat. He lives.
- Father.
- Marsinah.
It's all right.
You are safe now.
Everything's gonna be all right.
You attempted murder before the very eyes
of the protector of the faithful.
You have defiled his presence.
- Noble Caliph, I...
- Silence.
For a crime such as yours,
there is no defense to be spoken.
No defense to be spoken, All Highest.
But a living defense.
A breathing one, my daughter.
Then the magiciars story was true.
Entirely true, sire.
She was not the Wazir's wife, All Highest.
Not until after you left there.
Then she was seized
and married by force.
Such a marriage shall have life
no longer than my Wazir.
- The gardener.
- Not the gardener, my dearest.
- The Caliph.
- Marsinah?
Your name is Marsinah?
Only Marsinah.
I am no more than what I seemed.
And I am no less than I seemed,
no less in love, no less humorless.
Is this man be pardoned, O Caliph?
Pardon him, All Highest.
His crime was a service. Let him go free.
No. Don't ask that.
Under the circumstances... would embarrass the All Highest
to pardon his father-in-law.
Oh, prince of justice, let me help you
to compose this most difficult of verdicts...
...against a man who in his life
never once did right.
And never once wronged anyone.
Condemn the scoundrel
to some dreadful oasis.
At least a week's camel journey away.
Force him to take with him
the widow of the soon-to-be-late Wazir.
And all the property she can get...
...before the accounts are audited.
Condemn him to lighten her sorrow...
...and to toil ceaselessly... remove all grief from her heart.
You have just condemned yourself for life,
my lord.
And finally,
O prince of true believers...
...take from me my greatest treasure,
my daughter, Marsinah.
Take her away forever,
by marrying her to the end of her days.
Such is the Caliph's pleasure.
And so he orders.
Princes come, princes go
An hour of pomp and show they know
Princes come and over the sands
And over the sands of time
They go
Wise men come ever promising
The riddle of life to know
Wise men come
Ah, but over the sands
The silent sands of time
They go
Lovers come, lovers go
And all that there is to know
Lovers know
Only lovers know