What Just Happened (2008) Movie Script
[CAMERA CLICKS]
BEN:
Vanity Fair named me...
...as one of the 30 most powerful
producers in the business.
WOMAN: Over on the wall there and
on the table are charts which indicate...
...where each of you
has been designated to stand.
BEN: Power is an elusive term,
but in Hollywood, it's everything.
I don't care
what they say.
You either have it, want it,
or you're afraid of losing it.
Where you stand at these things
or who you may be standing next to...
...may not seem like the most
important thing, but it really matters.
- Congratulations.
- A bit awkward...
...but I was wondering if some changes
could be made to the placements.
- It's...
- Right.
Some of these people
are not really...
..."producer" producers,
if you know what I mean.
They just put their names
on the movies...
...but they don't really do anything.
BEN: You see, recently,
over a two-week period...
...my career, hell, my whole life,
was severely tested.
Let's just say my power credentials
were on the line, bigtime.
MAN 1 [IN MOVIE]: In his wacky crazy
kooky world, Charlie...
BEN: And it all started in Costa Mesa
at a preview of a film I produced.
MAN 2 [IN MOVIE]:
I can't feel my legs.
BEN:
The movie was titled Fiercely.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
IN MOVIE]
[BIRDS SQUAWKING]
BEN: These test screenings
with an audience are critical.
Always a lot of production people,
always a lot of marketing executives...
...and of course the studio chief,
Lou.
If the number is high,
there's a celebration...
...if the number is low,
and the preview cards stink...
...well, let's just say
many people will suffer.
She'll make sure of it.
I needed this one to work.
WOMAN [IN MOVIE]:
I know.
Go.
[GUNSHOT]
[DOG BARKING]
[BARKING]
I'm not gonna beg.
You think I care about me?
You think it's me I care about?
It's you I worry about.
I think they should kill him.
SEAN [IN MOVIE]:
Your salvation.
Father, forgive them,
they know not what they do.
[SLURPING]
[DOG BARKING]
No!
[AUDIENCE GASP]
MAN 2:
Oh, my God.
WOMAN 1:
They shot the dog. Poor thing.
WOMAN 2:
They shot the dog?
MAN 3:
Let's go.
WOMAN 3:
Excuse me. Excuse me.
[BIRDS SQUAWKING]
[GUNSHOT IN FILM]
MAN 4: Okay. How about that,
ladies and gentlemen?
What do you think? Listen, we'll just
ask you to remain in your seats...
...for just a few minutes
while we hand out these cards.
Will you hand out the cards,
please?
We appreciate you
taking the time to stick around...
...give us your thoughts. You are part
of the filmmaking process...
...and we value whatever it is
you have to say.
I want to remind you guys,
this is a test screening.
That's gonna mean
there's some post production.
When they're done, you want me to put
the cards and numbers in your car?
You can, you know how I feel. I don't
pay much attention to the numbers.
- You don't think they're relevant?
- No, Carl, we're here to lead.
Sure, sure, sure.
I noticed a couple of the shots...
...right before Sean Penn gets killed
were taken out of The Third Man.
Like, the way the dog
crosses between his legs...
...it's the same thing
with Harry Lime and the cat.
It's like he's, you know, he's building
upon what Carol Reed originally did
Ben. Ben. Ben, thank you for
allowing me to be part of this.
Fantastic. It's fantastic.
Big foreign upside.
Jimmy.
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
Ben, I'd like to introduce you to Jimmy.
Jimmy, Ben. Ben, Jimmy.
We just met, yes.
Jimmy wants to invest
in the next one.
Oh, that's good.
Where'd he get his money?
- Hair.
- Oh, hair?
- Hair.
- That's good to know.
- Yeah. More than 70 shops.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
- Well, let me think about that.
- Good. Good. Okay.
- Good.
Glad you guys liked the movie.
- Thank you. Nice to meet you.
JIMMY: Good job. Nice to meet you.
BOB: The length is the very least
of its problems, I guarantee.
- Sitting in there, you hear the people?
DICK: What about Sean?
BOB: That was brutal. Unrelenting.
DICK: Sean was Sean, it was...
BOB: The air was sucked out of the
room halfway through the damn thing.
I thought the girl was very, very good.
Didn't you?
BOB:
Please.
Blood, body parts,
heartbreaking sadness.
- How am I supposed to sell this thing?
DICK: Let's be positive.
- This could be the year for grief.
BOB: Grief for who?
They shot the dog in the head.
Hey, Ben.
It's good to see you, Bob.
- Dick, what are you doing here?
- I represent the girl.
She's gonna be a star.
I thought preview policy
was no agents?
I snuck in, I'm gonna sneak out.
So?
Yes?
What did you think?
Well, I thought there was
a lot of interesting stuff to...
I loved the music.
It's still in my head.
Thanks.
MAN:
Here you go.
DAWN: It's almost there, Ben. If Jeremy
would just cooperate with the cut...
...and we get lucky with the reviews,
we got a chance.
We'll deal with all this tomorrow.
I just gotta talk to Lou, it's time.
LOU: Ben. Where's your director?
- Hello.
Missed his plane at Heathrow, he's sick
about it. It'll be in tomorrow morning.
It's hard to produce
a good movie, Ben.
Very.
- Sean. Just brilliant.
SEAN: Hey.
- Brilliant work.
- Thanks. Hey, Ben.
You're never not great,
you're just great.
- Think we got a shot?
- Absolutely. Jeez.
- Well, we'll see.
LOU: Yeah.
BEN: I'll see you later.
LOU: Okay, I'll see you in Cannes.
- Did you work out the G5?
LOU: Yes.
I gotta smoke on the plane.
- We're gonna lose money.
- How do you know?
- A lot of money.
- You know this before it's done?
That's right.
- Even before the DVD comes out?
- Pretty much.
[HARMONICA MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
[MUSIC STOPS]
[HAZARD LIGHT CLICKING]
[ALARM CLOCK CHIMING]
I did try to call Jeremy
after the screening.
MAN: You seemed reluctant.
- I was not.
He's the director, for God's sakes.
If I did say:
"Fuck me, why should this be easy?"
That doesn't mean I'm not enthusiastic.
- You're feeling good about last night?
- Yes.
As I was saying,
I am very enthusiastic...
...and it's a little too soon
to get excited...
...but all signs to me say,
between us, through the roof.
- Through the roof? That's great.
- Yeah.
- That's great.
- Did you see this?
- About Jack?
- Yeah, did you hear about it?
- Yeah, I couldn't believe it.
- Yeah.
Yeah, it's terrible.
I'm looking at this headline.
Who would have guessed?
He was doing so well, right?
"Ten percenter
puts himself in turn around."
Bad joke.
Yeah, it's page one, that's cold.
But you still gotta admit
it's pretty funny, don't you think?
I can see how sympathetic you are.
Argh.
Oh, come
I'm on my way.
Yeah, I'll be there in two minutes.
No, I'm not late at all.
I'm not late, they'll be there
in plenty of time. That I promise.
They will be there on time. Hello?
Hello? Hello?
MAX:
Hi, Daddy.
- Morning, gorgeouses.
SOPHIE: Hi, Daddy.
Who dresses you guys?
MAX: We do.
SOPHIE: We do.
MAX: Mom wants to ask you something.
BEN: Now?
SOPHIE: She said it's okay
for you to go in the house...
...instead of using your cell phone.
BEN: Okay, I'll be right back.
Get in the car
and buckle yourselves up.
SOPHIE:
Okay.
BEN:
Kelly, I said I would do it.
You always say you'll do it,
but you don't.
I know, I'm under siege. I realize I
always say it, but this time it's true.
- For all of us.
- I'll do it, I'll take the kids this weekend.
A grand total of 90 minutes per day
of video and TV.
- Or the kids can't stay over.
- I know.
BEN: Where's the old sofa chair?
- I'm having it re-covered.
- I miss it.
- You miss the chair?
I love that chair.
I sat in it all the time.
I even remember
how much I paid for it.
Okay, Ben, let's play by the rules.
I thought our last session
went really well, didn't you?
Yeah, but this therapy is called
"How to Learn to Live Apart."
So we can move on gracefully.
Well, I still have feelings.
So do I.
That dark green velvet
was such a good look for that chair.
What? I felt like a change.
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Can I call you?
[SIGHS]
Yeah. Of course.
BEN:
Okay. See you later, guys.
SCOTT: Hey, Ben.
- Scott.
- So how were the numbers last night?
- Just a number.
SCOTT: Oh, by the way,
I just finished my script.
BEN:
So, what is it?
Come on, don't play hard to get,
tell me.
I'm not gonna tell you.
I'm not gonna tell you.
BEN:
I'm gonna find out anyway.
SCOTT: It's about a florist.
- Oh, no.
SCOTT:
It's a rich world.
A flower shop as a background
for ambivalence and deceit.
It's the Rose Bowl Parade meets
The Da Vinci Code. That kind of thing.
- It's not a movie.
- It's not a movie? What is it?
Flowers on the big screen?
I don't think so. Won't work.
- Try Leonard, it might be his thing.
- I already did.
BEN: You went to Leonard
before you went to me?
He's the coach
of my kids' soccer team.
Scott, come on. Leonard?
What difference does it make
if you're not interested?
Loyalty matters to me.
What did Leonard say?
There were
some very interesting aspects.
What did he say?
- He said it's not a movie.
- There you have it.
SCOTT: It's too bad about Jack, huh?
- It's rare.
Usually agents kill others,
not themselves.
- Yeah, but out of the blue? I mean...
- It happens, you know.
- Suicide, it happens?
- Stress, it builds up. I'll see you later.
See you later.
MAN [ON STEREO]:
This is Fiercely, cue 4M-2. Take 7.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[PHONE RINGS]
BEN: Cal, talk to me,
what happened at the rehearsal?
CAL: You're not gonna believe it. Bruce
shows up with a Grizzly Adams beard.
He's got a Grizzly Adams beard?
Yes, and he's a pig.
You want to direct him?
That's not my job.
What do you mean he's a pig?
- He's fat.
- Bruce Willis is overweight?
Overweight,
with a Grizzly Adams beard.
- He's fooling with you.
- The biggest beard you've ever seen.
- Don't worry.
- There's no way to know it's Bruce.
I will see you this afternoon.
I'm at a production meeting right now,
I can't talk. Goodbye.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I think Mom's in the back
if you want to say hi.
Do I have to?
Your eyes are all red.
No. No.
- A little bit.
- Just Just stuff, you know.
If it's boy stuff,
you can always talk to me about it.
I know some things
your mother doesn't know.
- I'm sure you do.
- No, seriously, you can ask me.
- Okay. Yeah.
- Yeah?
Okay. I'll be right back.
BEN:
What's with Zoe?
Oh, girl stuff. I don't know.
Is she dating? Parties or anything? She
doesn't really tell me much.
she just kind of
keeps things to herself.
I think she gets that from you.
I think she tells us about.
as much about what she does as
you would tell me about what you do.
Secrets seem to be
the family hobby.
I think it's in the DNA.
Boy, this place has gone way up.
I wished I still owned it.
Yeah, but you don't.
Gotta go.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- Looking good, Ben.
- You too.
Bye.
ZOE: You know,
it's not every 17-year-old...
who still has their dad
drive them to school.
I kind of like it.
It makes me feel like a kid.
BEN: You are a kid, and I'm a lucky guy.
I still get to drive you to school.
Think you'll still pick me up
and drop me off when I go to college?
You bet, if you'll let me.
I don't know,
let's just say it's negotiable.
I'm a good negotiator.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
Will you please stop saying,
"If they don't fuck up my cut.
we may have something
we don't mind putting our names on"?
- I know that.
JEREMY: Look, mate.
I don't want to get
too lofty or nothing about it.
but I made a film that doesn't wallow
in the cliches of retribution.
I don't want to satisfy
the audience.
- by letting them get even.
- That's true.
- I didn't do that when you hired me.
- That's true.
But let's just say that when those that
put up the money finally see.
the bad guys get away
and the little dog get murdered...
they get concerned.
Look, for my part,
if the dog gets shot in the head, fine.
If the kids all love it and laugh,
even better.
Probably that'll never happen. Kids
You know what's gonna happen.
Fucking hell. Didn't you?
You said to me, that Lou said,
and I quote:
- "It's a good movie"?
- She did, three times.
And that concerns you?
- A bit.
- How's that?
Jeremy, I don't know what "good"
means in South London.
but north of Pico
at a preview screening.
where Lou says "good" three times,
drop your pants.
bite down hard,
this one's gonna hurt.
I'm not buying it, mate. Come on.
I mean, you know...
[SIGHS]
I mean, were you watching
the audience watch the movie?
- Of course I was.
- What was their overall reaction?
Like they took their kids to Disneyland,
watched Mickey Mouse...
douse himself with gasoline
and set himself on fire.
[LAUGHS]
I'm actually all right with that.
It's like, what? What we got?
Like, two weeks to red carpet, right?
The festival took the film because they
want stars. Only saw a 10-minute reel.
The studio could pull it
from the festival with a phone call.
JEREMY:
Now you're overheating, mate.
I don't think so. We're gonna have to
accommodate Lou in some way.
Throw her a bone, something,
or the road could get a bit weird.
JEREMY: What, you're saying
now you're not gonna protect my cut?
I'm gonna protect your cut.
DAWN: That's what Ben does.
BEN: Thank you.
I just want you to understand
the terrain we're about to cross.
- The preview was terrifying.
JEREMY: All right, look.
Just stand united and we'll prevail.
Yeah, you know.
I'll explain the whole sort of raison
d'etre thing to Lou and she'll listen.
- All right?
- All right. I'm here to support you.
JEREMY: Look, all I'm saying is, and I
don't mean to flog it, but, you know.
I think you should be proud.
We went out on a limb on this one.
BEN:
I am proud.
JEREMY: Yeah, well,
it's not just about the money, is it?
BEN: We already got the money,
now we gotta get the money back.
JEREMY:
Morning, all.
In the end, no director, no stars,
not even a title, just a number.
A big number.
LOU:
You're really good.
My God, kill the dog.
Of course.
What a brilliant tactical move.
You know, Ben,
I always sensed you were blessed.
with good instinctive negotiating
skills, but killing the dog? Oh, boy.
Well, we wanted
to do the unexpected.
JEREMY:
What a surprise, eh? No, that's
Sometimes you just gotta muss up
their hair and kick them in the balls...
- . just to make sure they're breathing.
- Easy. Easy, big fella.
LOU:
A bargaining chip.
You figured, leave the dead dog
in the movie now.
knowing it wasn't in the script,
I'd cut it out and say:
"Okay, Lou, dog stuff's gone,
how about we just
keep the rest of the stuff as it is,
and call it a day?"
I'm too old for this.
Well, Lou, I think there's
another way to look at it too.
What are you saying?
We've got a problem.
Hold on. Hold on, you're not gonna
touch my ending, now are you?
I mean, that's not what I'm hearing,
is it?
- Did anyone see Amores Perros?
- What?
JEREMY:
Amores Perros, did you see it?
I mean, what's that film about?
Cruelty? No.
It's about reality, and about loss.
And, you know, I mean, look.
the simple thing is
you can make a film.
that has a bit more
profundity to it, you know.
and something that people
will actually remember.
or the same old
load of bollocks, really.
I mean, I thought we were
trying to do something great.
No? I mean, I toned it down.
I've done that.
I mean, I toned it way down.
- Didn't I? With that scene.
- He did.
Serious problem.
Look, the dog has to die.
Trust me, kemosabe,
you gotta back up.
LOU: I'm sorry, maybe I'm not
being clear, maybe
Sorry, excuse me, I don't think Sean
would have done the movie
if it weren't hard-hitting
and didn't take some real risks.
- Absolutely.
LOU: Would you excuse us?
Now, please?
Look, I've lost $25 million before.
. I'll lose $25 million again.
We've managed to put together
extensive notes for you.
Very extensive. If you do the kind of
work that needs to be done.
I'll lose a little less.
Maybe $15 million less.
So you're asking me
to eviscerate my film.
so you can lose
a little less money?
- I would be very appreciative.
- I can't do that.
Well, let us chew on this.
No, look, the dog dies!
- I don't think so.
- Are you taking the piss now?
No, not really.
Listen, let's not make this
even more awkward than it is.
- We respect you. Fix it.
- It's not broken.
- My guts are in that cut, mate. Right?
- I know.
Right?
LOU:
Listen, do the right thing. Okay?
- Oh, the right thing, now, is it?
LOU: The right thing.
I'm sorry, does he have final cut?
Um Um No.
- The right thing.
JEREMY: What?
Or your big evening in Cannes
will be canceled...
and I'll take the movie away
from you and recut it myself.
Jeremy. Jeremy. Jeremy.
No, no, don't Please, don't
Stop. Take it easy, take it easy.
That's not the way.
Take it easy. Get ahold of yourself.
- Get ahold of yourself.
- What do you suggest?
BEN:
Well, he'll come around. He's fine.
He'll be fine. It's jet lag.
I'll take care of it, it's okay. Come on.
- Get a grip.
- I just.
[SOBBING]
Let's just Let's just go.
- We don't have much time.
BEN: I'll take care of it.
[JEREMY SOBBING]
LOU:
Do you believe this?
BEN: Yeah, I saw it. Had 10 percent
of the brass ring, didn't he?
I'd fuck him.
My old bed. God, I love this bed.
Are these new sheets?
- This is a huge mistake.
- Don't say that.
No, I just I can't do this.
I can't do this. This is.
And this is as much my fault
as yours.
This is why we're seeing Dr. Randall,
to not do this.
Let's not tell her.
Why are you so comfortable
after almost a year, and I'm nervous?
- Why is that?
- You still look fantastic.
I appreciate that.
You want me to go?
- Yes, no.
- I won't talk.
No, I'd like to talk.
- Good, let's talk. I'll start.
- Okay.
I admit, I do love this bed
but only with you in it.
Even if only for a moment,
I'm just so grateful to be back here.
- Really?
- Truly.
I don't know, all the lawyers
and everything, it's so
- It's awkward, you know?
- And all the money.
Yeah. I don't know.
It's just been so long.
I just feel like if I could do this,
I feel so vulnerable and.
I know how you feel.
It's complicated.
I don't feel just one way, you know?
I understand.
I never feel just one way.
- Really?
- Truly.
I.
[PHONE RINGING]
- This could be important.
- If you could only focus.
- If you could just focus.
- Let's both hold on to that thought.
- Hello?
CAL: I have him.
- Who?
- Him.
- Who?
- Bruce Willis.
Oh, yeah? Okay, good, good.
BRUCE: Hello?
- Hey. Amigo.
BRUCE:
I heard something.
- What?
- Concern about my beard.
- Or is it buyer's remorse?
- What?
Hang on a second, wait a second.
I have to I'll be right back.
It's business.
He's a fucking movie star.
- I got issues to resolve.
- What?
Like shaving the beard, it's like
It sounds crazy, but it's a big deal.
I don't know what to do.
Tell him you'll call him back.
Be a man.
- You're right, you're right. Hello?
- Hello.
- Hey, hey, there you are.
- I'm all ears.
Listen, did I tell you how truly happy
I am that you're doing this movie?
- A lot of actors were circling this, but
- Get to the point.
Can you give me five seconds?
I gotta deal with something.
- What? Yeah.
- Thanks.
- You're kidding, right?
- No, come on, Kelly.
Kelly. Kelly.
- Hello? Yeah, I'm back.
- Hello.
- We should talk about this.
- We do need to talk.
No, I think face to face.
Face to face is always better.
You're absolutely right.
Could you just give me five seconds?
Five seconds?
Kelly? Kelly. Kelly. Kelly.
[PHONE HANGS UP]
Hello? Hello?
Kelly!
Kelly.
BEN: Jeremy,
I'm coming to the editing room.
I know we have things to talk about.
You know,
I have some problems of my own.
- You get our star?
- I've left voice mails at every number.
- What's this?
- Oh, I'm just referencing the cards.
These aren't Hallmark cards, Carl.
- This isn't magazine material.
- Okay.
- This is private business.
- Yeah, I mean, I thought that
- Put them in a drawer, lock them up.
- Okay. All right.
You let somebody in the office
without discussing with me first?
- No, no
- Let's get a grip. Come on.
- What are we doing? Falling apart.
- No, he's from Studio Services.
I can't believe this.
After one bad screening?
You gotta be kidding me.
Son of a bitch, I can't
People have no shame.
Ruthless pricks.
- Who's moving in here?
- What?
Who is moving in here?
What production company?
- Who is coming in here, Carl?
- Oh, him.
Yeah, him, him, the guy you let in
that you shouldn't have.
CARL: No, this is for the new carpeting.
- What new carpeting?
What new carpeting? When?
What new carpeting?
- The carpet you ordered.
- I never. When was that?
Back in February.
- So it's? I ordered it in February?
- Yeah.
It takes three months
to order new carpeting?
I badgered them. It was a special order
because it was a white shag carpet.
- You know
- Carl, I don't get white shag.
You gotta be kidding me.
I wouldn't be caught dead with shag.
You said it went well
with the black chairs.
- That's why you ordered white shag.
- You're right, okay. I stand corrected.
- Really?
- Yes. I'm in the editing room. It's okay.
JEREMY:
Oh, fucking...!
You may not realize this now.
but I was protecting you
and our movie in that office.
I went out, man. I really went out.
I can see that,
but maybe that's a good thing.
No. No, I went out.
I had 11 months 22 days,
mate, right?
I had no drugs, I had no alcohol...
till after that meeting
with that cow Lou.
and your assassin in training,
your assistant.
he decides to give me an Ativan.
Well, one Ativan
doesn't sound so terrible.
Yeah, right.
Try following it up with three Dilaudids
scored from a barman.
and all washed down
with rum and Cokes, right?
Okay, then, you needed a release.
It can happen to anyone.
No, look, look.
I was seven days away
from getting a cake, man.
Right? A cake for a year sober.
Me, a cake.
And you and your diabolical
bloody naked treachery.
took that away from me.
- No, that's not true.
- Not true.
- Come on, Jeremy.
- Not true.
- Jeremy.
JEREMY: Ow!
- How's that?
- That's not necessary.
Shouldn't we save this high drama
for the big screen?
Yeah, or that one,
the one that my blood's in.
- I know that, and I'm the producer.
- My blood on that film, right?
Blood that goes all the way back
to a Jewish ghetto in Vilna...
a little shtetl.
How could you possibly understand
anything like that?
Let me get you a Valium.
Just for now. It's not that I don't
But we're on a deadline.
This is for us, these changes.
Can I have a couple of Vicodin
instead?
Sure, easy.
- Go get three of them, Ben.
- Three? Coming up.
Yeah, get me My office
to get three Vicodin.
and bring them to the cutting room
right away.
Let's put that down.
[AUDIO SCRUBBING]
Jeremy, look, we're gonna need you
to dig deep on this one.
You can do it.
We get our victory in Cannes.
I get these bastards to spend a lot
and distribute this movie properly.
- You can do it.
- It's just so fucking hard for me, man.
I mean, you know, it's my work.
It's all I've got.
Trust me, once you make
these cuts and trims.
and take out that damn dead dog,
you will feel cleansed.
You will forget the pain.
[GUNSHOT]
It's okay.
As long as we do a viewing together
before we leave, okay?
- Call me anytime you want.
- Okay. I will, Ben.
Give me a hug.
[JEREMY SOBBING]
I'm sorry.
It's okay. It's okay.
- That's okay.
- I'm sorry, Ben.
No, don't look.
I'm so scared, Ben.
We're on a deadline,
so let's get to work.
Okay? Let's get to work.
BEN: Cal, Cal, relax.
I'm coming to see Bruce.
No, no, you're not listening.
I'm driving on the 405 as we speak.
Five minutes away.
I'm driving right over the
Relax, I'm going over the hill.
I'll be there in a minute.
It doesn't matter. It'll be fine.
MAN [ON STEREO]: This is Fiercely.
Cue one and one, take one.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
MAN: I need grips and I need stand-ins.
Come on.
CAL: Ten minutes
was an hour and a half ago.
- We got a crisis here.
- Lot of traffic, lot of traffic.
I saw Moses through the window.
What's the status of the beard?
CAL: I don't know.
- Did you tell him he has to shave?
CAL: I'm gonna bring it up,
but I just haven't done it yet.
BEN: We start shooting Friday.
Today is Tuesday.
CAL: I'm the director,
I know what day it is.
I suppose it took a long time
to grow it.
Probably wants to wait
till the last minute.
That's what I thought,
but after seeing him today.
I got the sense
that this is his look.
- It's an artistic choice.
- The extra weight is too?
- It can't be.
CAL: It's a feeling.
Cal, we got the studio to pay him
$20 million to be a leading man.
For that kind of money,
there is an expectation.
CAL: They expect a good performance.
- No, no, no, Cal.
For that kind of money,
they expect millions of women.
to want intercourse with him.
Do you understand
what I'm saying?
You want a poster that says,
"See Santa run"?
Okay. Okay.
MAN 1:
We need more 4-by-8 plywood here.
BEN: Okay.
MAN 2: Watch your back.
- Okay, let's go tell him to shave.
- Okay.
Okay. He'll shave, okay?
Especially if he hears it from you.
That's the hope.
BRUCE:
Motherfuckers! Motherfuckers!
Motherfuckers!
We are talking about my fucking
artistic integrity here, goddamn it.
My artistic integrity, okay?
Audiences wanna know it's you,
Bruce. They expect it.
And we're talking about
a lot of money here.
What are you talking about?
They're not gonna recognize me?
"Where'd Bruce go, huh?
Can't see Bruce no more.
Where's my favorite movie star?
Oh, look, there he is.
I see him right there,
the guy with the beard."
Yes, but there's a
You know,
this is a certain demographic
that has to be served, Bruce.
That's the business.
You have to do it.
I mean, that's just a fact.
It's about falling in love with a hero.
There's a tradition to this stuff, Bruce,
there just is.
- Oh, I see, we're talking about pussy.
- More or less.
I understand, I understand.
Pussy's good.
Let me tell you a funny story.
I've been growing this for six months.
I've been knocking off trim 24/7,
and never one fucking complaint.
- Maybe we should listen to
- Shut up.
Hollywood producer, my ass.
I should've seen this mentality coming.
Really, should've seen it coming.
Never a doubt. Never a fucking doubt.
BEN: Bruce, Bruce, Bruce.
Come here and talk, Bruce.
Bruce, Bruce, come on.
- You wanna talk about integrity?
- Let's talk about integrity.
- Let's talk about fucking integrity.
- Let's go. Okay, let's go.
Let's talk about integrity.
I'm willing to stack my three
last pictures against your three.
How about that, huh?
Let's talk about integrity.
You don't have three pictures.
You don't have any.
You know why?
Because you're a fucking producer.
Well, why don't we start.
by giving your overblown salary
to the fucking Red Cross?
- That would show me some integrity.
- What? What?
Sorry.
Motherfuckers.
Fucking babies!
Can't fucking believe this shit.
No, no, no, you shouldn't
wear any beards.
How about this?
Why don't we just not have clothes
in the fucking movies anymore?
How about fucking paying for that?
I never realized
how strongly he felt about it.
I think he wants it.
BRUCE: This here's your fucking chair.
How's that?
You motherfuckers.
Will somebody fix this fucking door?
Jesus Christ.
You happy now
that you got my pressure up?
You fucking
BEN: Well, somehow
I don't think he expects to shave.
CAL: You know, in a very early draft,
the script mentioned he had a beard.
- A very early draft.
- Yeah.
Hey, now that video's done,
we won't be needing that shit.
Blow me, you motherfuckers!
Blow me.
- We don't have much of a choice.
- No. I don't
- The beard's not so bad anyway.
- Maybe it's not so bad.
MAN [ON STEREO]:
This is Fiercely, 6M6, take three.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
BEN:
I do, I get it, Sidney, I do.
Of all the studio heads,
you are the funniest.
- But listen
SIDNEY: Thank you, thank you.
You're welcome.
You gotta stay with me here.
This is Bruce Willis
we're talking about.
Maybe we need to bend a little,
to think creatively.
In fact, I gotta say, he might be right,
a beard might be a good idea.
You never know.
Sometimes we don't know.
- Let's keep it simple.
- Hello?
Let's keep it simple, Ben.
I'm not Lou. I like to be direct.
Yes.
Okay, tell me what I have to do.
If that bastard doesn't shave
and look like a leading man...
A, we shut the movie down,
B, we sue him for all damages.
. and C, we then sue you
for misrepresentation.
Oh, Sidney, come on.
Let's sit down and have lunch
and discuss this like men.
- Come on.
- We bought a movie star.
- Call my office.
- Sidney. Sid.
Sidney. Hello?
BEN [ON SPEAKERPHONE]: Are you
saying Bruce never mentioned this?
You're his agent,
his confidant, for God's sakes.
We're on the ledge on this one.
He's got four days to clean himself up,
and that's it.
I'll even personally pay for the trainer.
How about that?
- You have got to be kidding.
- No, no, Dick.
No, I'm not kidding, Dick,
it is happening.
- You tell me it's happening?
- Afraid so.
- It can't be.
- It is happening. Afraid so.
[DICK GAGGING]
What's that?
- What's that? Dick.
- It's nothing.
- That's nothing?
- Finish your point.
- How much does he know, huh?
- It's a bit sketchy.
We got lathered up. Things might
have been taken out of context.
- Tell me exactly what was said.
- You know how it goes:
"Fuck you." "No, no, fuck you."
And then it got worse.
Why not call me back
after you talk to him? Let's do that.
Tell him he's gonna get fired and sued
for money in his piggy bank?
I don't want to.
- You give him the bad news.
- Dick, you're an agent.
Delivering bad news
is part of the job description.
I can't do it.
The messenger gets killed.
You know that. I can't.
I've been working with him
for two years.
He's one of my most important clients,
but he's very mercurial.
- He can snap at any time.
- You're scared of him.
I'm not scared of him,
I'm scared of all of them.
- Could you hold a sec?
- Sure.
[DICK GRUNTING]
You okay?
Dick, you okay?
Maybe we should do this later.
Yeah, let's do this later.
It's a... It's a...
It's a stomach disorder.
It comes and it.
[DICK GRUNTING]
. goes.
- You sure?
- No, seriously, I'm fine.
Absolutely. They cut me back
on my antidepressants.
...so I can get it up.
But the withdrawal
makes my stomach clench.
It sounds worse than it is.
I even had to cut back Klonopin.
- When do you take that?
- Travel.
- Whenever I pack.
- Whenever you pack?
Your client has got to give us
some relief.
Let's figure out
how we can solve this beard thing.
Well, to start, why don't we let him
wear his fucking beard?
What is the big deal?
Oh, no, no, no.
Hey, Dick, we're way past that now.
Do you know the ramifications
of what you're asking of me?
I do.
[DICK GRUNTING & GAGGING]
Jesus, man,
you gotta get ahold of yourself.
You should talk to somebody
about that stomach.
- Okay, gotta go.
- Okay.
- Bye, now.
- Bye.
KELLY [ON MACHINE]: Hi, leave
a message for Kelly, Sophie or Max.
Kelly, it's Ben, just call me
on my cell anytime, anytime.
Okay, bye.
KELLY [ON MACHINE]: Hi, leave
a message for Kelly, Sophie or Max.
Kelly.
It's me. I'm on my cell.
I need to talk to you.
I'm having dinner
with some money people tonight.
but you're more important to me.
Call me on my cell
as soon as you get this.
Thank you.
[ALL SPEAKING IN
FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
- The money is in the box.
JOHNNY: Money's in the box.
Could you make the movie
in 50 days?
No.
[MEN SPEAKING
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
ABA: Well, we're sitting there drinking
with Stallone
Sly, Sly, Sly.
and Don Johnson
is sitting three tables away from us.
He'd be very good in this.
Ah.
Could you excuse me
for one moment?
- Where'd he get his money from?
- Dry cleaning.
He started by cleaning
the wardrobes for the movie studios.
He charged them like $10 a suit.
They paid.
Next time, he charged them $50 a suit.
They paid.
Next time, charged them $100 a suit.
They paid.
He said, "I wanna be in the movie
business. I understand these people."
[PHONE RINGS]
- Kelly. Kelly Oh, Kelly Excuse me.
- Sure.
I'll be right back. Yes, Kelly.
I'm so glad you called me back.
So an actor more important
than the mother of your children?
Of course I don't think
he's as important as you.
- Ten times, you called.
- No, I didn't.
I did not call you 10 times today,
I called you four times.
Well, what was so damn important?
Couldn't be me.
Look, let me find a quiet place
and I'll tell you.
I'll tell you what's so important.
I just I just
I wanted to know...
is anyone else other than you
sleeping in our old bed?
What?
You lost that privilege
over two years ago.
Wait a second, I believe 30,000
a month entitles me to something.
- You know, I gotta be frank with you.
- Fuck you.
I have never heard you say:
"Fuck you", like that to me
in front of the kids.
- What are you doing?
- The kids are sleeping.
Okay, I'm all done.
Can't we discuss this now?
I'll come over.
- No. No.
- Please? Please?
- No. No.
- Please? Please.
- Ben, no.
- Look, I'm hurting.
- You're hurting?
- Yeah, there, I've said it.
- I'm hurting.
- You really are?
Yeah, yeah, I am, I am.
Oh, hold on.
Dick, Dick, I need to talk to you.
- Yeah, I'm hurting.
- Get some fucking help.
You're right. I know it's a bad habit.
I'm working on it, believe me.
Look, can't we please
discuss it now? Please?
I have to I gotta go. I gotta go.
Okay, all right, all right.
I suppose it's not a good time.
Thanks for Yeah, we'll speak soon.
Thanks for returning my call.
DICK:
I'll have a martin I'll drink
I'll order two martinis
and have them both.
- I could use it. I could use it.
- Let's order two martinis, large.
DICK: Hi.
- Did you tell him?
Huh?
- Did you tell him?
- I eluded to it, yes.
- "Alluded"?
- I meant "allude."
I don't care what you meant.
"Alluded" or "eluded"?
- "Alluded." A-L-L-U-D-E-D.
- Yes, that's what I
- Okay.
- I hinted at it. I didn't elude.
A picture is about to get canceled.
What does that mean, "alluded"?
I told him I have something
important to discuss.
- And you told him what it was about?
- I.
A-B-O-U-T, "about"?
- Not yet.
- Not yet, okay.
- No, no.
- Sorry for the intrusion.
- What's with the patch?
- Shingles.
My lid, occasionally it flutters.
It's nothing.
I'm just glad
it's not anything serious.
[ALL LAUGH]
- Hey, if I went blind, you'd celebrate.
- Yeah, probably.
[ALL LAUGH]
I hope you know you're sitting
with a great ex-agent.
- Yeah.
- Just give me one more minute.
- Yeah.
- Excuse us.
He has lots of time.
He can sit at the bar.
How could you call
and not mention this?
There's a logic to these things.
You met him, the man's an animal.
When I called him today,
he hadn't eaten yet.
That's the wrong time.
You gotta do this
when there's an open window.
We don't have that many windows left.
When's the next window?
- After AA would be an open window.
- When's that?
- Two days.
- That's no good.
- What's tomorrow morning?
- Analysis. He'll be nuts for hours after.
You don't wanna mention lawsuit
or beard after psychotherapy.
Listen to me. I don't care.
Find a window tomorrow. That's it.
[DOOR OPENS]
I know what you think
this looks like, but it's not.
Johnny did not send me here
to make you happy.
I wanted to meet you on my own.
I know everything you've done.
I know who you are.
And I'm not just some silly girl
in tight clothes.
- I went to Stanford.
- That's a good school.
I just.
I just wanna get to know you.
BEN:
Me?
What's your name again?
- Laura.
- Laura.
I respect you and your movies.
And I know
if I don't take this chance now.
no matter how aggressive
it might seem.
my chance will never
come up again.
That's so flattering.
I mean, I guess if I were a tailor,
you'd still be doing this. Am I right?
[LAURA LAUGHS]
You are such a funny person.
And I want you to know that
there is nothing I wouldn't do.
for a chance to see you
on my own.
with no strings attached.
Unless you wanna
do something now.
BEN:
Now?
[TOILET FLUSHES]
LAURA: Well, why don't you just
call me then?
Try not to get that wet.
[BEEP]
[PHONE RINGING ON OTHER END]
KELLY [ON MACHINE]: Hi. Leave
a message for Kelly, Sophie or Max.
[ALARM CHIMES]
WOMAN [ON STEREO]: Inhale,
move forward to upward dog.
Exhale to downward dog.
Take five deep
LAURA: I can't stay for breakfast.
I have three scripts to read.
Hm.
- You wanna kiss them one more time?
WOMAN: Jump towards the front
You don't remember a thing,
do you?
I remember offering you
a two-picture deal.
And that was before
we took Ecstasy.
WOMAN: Before you do that
- I gotta go.
I dig older guys.
[PHONE RINGING]
Seventy-four, 75, 76, 77...
BEN: Hello?
CAL: Ben. Sid's office sent an e-mail
BEN: I'm not here.
- Shit.
Man, I hate that thing.
Sid wants the Bruce/beard
situation handled before the lunch.
[PHONE RINGS]
CARL: Hey, just got an e-mail.
Vanity Fair wants you.
Thirty most powerful producers
for their power issue.
How about that?
[PHONE RINGS]
CAL: Sid's office called again.
Here, I'll just read you the quote.
"I want the beard situation resolved
before the fucking lunch." End quote.
BEN: Can you call Sid's office, tell him
I'm trying to resolve this beard thing?
I'll talk to him at lunch.
WAITRESS:
I'm so sorry.
Mr. Voss's office just called
and he simply can't make the lunch.
They sent over this note.
For you.
MAN: Oh, how are you?
WOMAN: I'm doing well.
I forgot my reading glasses
in the car.
Could you read it to me, please?
Of course.
"Dear Ben,
don't think for a second...
having lunch was gonna change
a fucking.
thing.
Unless that fucking beard goes.
then we fucking shut.
the whole fucking movie down."
Betty, tell Sid I tried
to get Bruce three times.
I can't get him on the phone.
I've got a crew of 200 standing by.
- We start shooting on Friday.
BETTY: We don't have time.
I know I'm running out of time.
- You've gotta make it happen.
- Fine.
Ben? I got Kelly holding on 2.
Okay.
- Jeremy's on 3. He says it's urgent.
- Okay.
KELLY [ON PHONE]: Ben? Ben?
- Kelly, just hold on.
- Ben.
- Jeremy, talk to me.
JEREMY: You better like it, baby.
- Jeremy.
- Get here. Now. Jesus.
- I'm coming. I'm coming.
- Coming.
DAWN: Kelly.
Hi. Kelly? Kelly? Kelly?
Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go.
What's up?
Afternoon. Do I look happy?
Enough to scare me.
You like it?
It's good, I know, but it's the feather
that gets me there.
You know what I mean?
It's like me, Tonto.
the studio, the Lone Ranger, like.
I mean, I'm not gonna
fight a battle I can't win.
A fucking waste of time.
It makes no sense.
Jeremy, sometimes it takes more guts
to concede.
Have a seat. Come on.
[AUDIO SCRUBBING]
Got about 10 minutes out of this
altogether just by shaking the box.
And here comes
the dreaded ending.
[GUNSHOT]
Like the music? It contradicts
the violence, and they'll love that.
Here we go.
SEAN [IN FILM]: Father, forgive them.
They know not what they do.
- See? Now dog.
- Yeah.
Ah. Dog not shot.
Runs to master to comfort him.
[DOG WHIMPERING]
It's great.
JEREMY:
Yeah.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
- So?
BEN: That's great.
[JEREMY LAUGHING]
Wow.
- Not bad, eh?
- Not bad.
Lou will come in her pants.
- Yeah. Panties.
- Pants, actually, yeah.
Point taken. I don't know, Jeremy.
I don't know.
- How did you figure?
- That was just an outtake.
We had about 10 of them.
You remember? We could never
get that dog under control.
Lovely though he was.
I mean, it was like He loved Sean.
He was always licking his face.
- It's brilliant.
- And there you have it, you know.
Quite simple, really.
- Brilliant. Brilliant.
- Thank you.
It certainly
It changes the tone of the movie.
Yeah. No, I know what
you're gonna say. Right.
It won't mean nothing now.
The truth of it is we can take comfort
in the fact we're not gonna offend.
Jeremy, I don't get it.
- This isn't you talking.
- It's me, isn't it?
- I mean, how did you get there?
- How did I do it?
There we go. Oh, Christ.
I'll grab them later.
Those are Placidil.
And you're meant to take it
three times a day.
You could watch your old mom
get gang raped in broad daylight...
and still appreciate the weather.
Apparently the stuff works.
I gotta call Lou.
Hello? Judy?
Hello, Judy?
Is Lou there?
[PHONE RINGS]
- Yes, Ben?
- Lou.
Lou, Jeremy has done it.
Really done it.
I think we licked this bastard.
- I knew you would make this work.
- We ham-and-egged it.
Not that I doubt you,
but when can I see it?
[TOILET FLUSHES]
- You can see it whenever you want.
- Tell Jeremy I'll be by around 2.
Okay, okay, I'll tell him.
She'll be by this afternoon
with her creative team.
Pick out your tux and leisure wear...
because we're gonna be heading
for Cannes.
Where can I kiss you? Where?
Name the location. Where?
JEREMY: Placidil is not hearing.
- Great, great.
JEREMY:
Thank you, Ben.
It's nice to see you happy, mate.
Boy. Jeremy, I'm so relieved.
- Oh, me too.
- All right.
- Keep up the good Work.
- Will do, man. Absolutely.
Happy?
Yep.
BEN:
No. Dick. Dick.
You have to face this thing now.
You've gotta tell Bruce
he's gotta get rid of that beard.
You understand? Now.
Not tomorrow.
Now. Right away.
You've gotta tell
You gotta tell Bruce now.
I can't afford
to lose this movie, Dick.
Get back to me.
I thought the goal here
was not to get us back together...
but to help us feel better
about being apart.
You know, moving on gracefully.
- We share two kids.
THERAPIST: That's exactly right.
This is an exercise to help couples
separate with love.
instead of acrimony.
It's not about trying to control
the other person's behavior.
- Okay.
THERAPIST: Let's start again.
Is there anything you can think of
that you've done to Kelly.
while you were married
that you wish you didn't?
Well, that question feels so vague.
I don't know.
Okay, here's an example.
When you were married,
did you lie.
about your whereabouts
with other women?
No.
Well, there was.
Yeah, there was one time
when we were married...
when I did think of seeing Ann.
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
- And did you?
- No, no. I mean, I...
Yes, I... But nothing happened.
I just
Well, I guess I wanted to, but, hey.
You know,
I think I know what you mean.
I'm starting to feel
a little better already.
- Is that everything on this matter?
- Just about.
Not true.
The complete truth
will set you free, Ben.
Well, there was...
There was one time...
I was at a party with...
I was at a party once with Ann.
Where?
- Hm?
- Where?
In the bathroom.
You fucker.
That's very good, Ben.
Now, Kelly, it is not for you to judge.
This is just a start.
We're running short on time.
Let's give Kelly a chance.
And then next week,
we'll dig deeper.
- You ready, Kelly?
- Yes.
Did you ever use your kids
as ammunition against Ben?
No.
Did you ever have an affair
while you were married?
Absolutely not.
Okay, then. Is that all?
Well, there was
Alan's son's bar mitzvah.
I kissed Alan on the mouth
in the master bathroom.
You kissed him on the mouth?
- I mean.
- It was nothing.
Alan on the m?
What about Sheila?
- Oh, please.
- Your friend.
Please. That's all that happened.
Nothing.
- That's very good.
- I must admit, though.
I thought about it, actually.
That's very good.
What about? I mean I mean
Why don't we talk?
Aren't we gonna talk about what
we're doing to each other now?
Why don't we talk about
what we're doing?
- What?
- Why don't we talk about 'now'?
You didn't wanna talk
about 'now' before.
No. Now.
You know what. Now.
Yeah, but "now" before was not okay.
Why is "now" now okay?
I have no problem with 'now'.
You have a problem with 'now'.
- That is not why we're here.
- That's why.
Doctor, is this some classic case
of avoidance?
I'm sorry, but we're gonna have to
table this discussion until next time.
What you guys are doing takes guts,
but it is going to work.
I congratulate both of you.
You'll see.
As we dig deeper, you're gonna
feel so good about being apart.
that you're never gonna wanna
get back together.
But I'm just, you know, why?
Can't we just talk about the 'now'
for a minute?
- Like what she's doing.
- We're out of time.
She said no. She said no.
- Why can't we talk?
- Our time is up.
I know time is up.
We're paying money.
- We can't stay two more minutes?
- Thank you.
THERAPIST:
You're welcome.
Thanks.
KELLY:
Let's go. Let's go.
Let's go.
[PHONE RINGING]
[PHONE CONTINUES RINGING]
[PHONE STOPS RINGING]
Thank you.
CARL [ON PHONE]:
Hey, I've tried Dick's office.
and they say that they're gonna try
and track him down.
They'll get back to us in 10 or 15.
[BEEP]
CARL: Nobody seems to know where
Dick is. Should I call Bruce's office?
[BEEP]
CARL: I tried Bruce's office and he told
them to tell me to tell you to fuck off.
. so I don't where should I go?
[BEEP]
CARL: Ben, Sidney Voss just called.
Sidney Voss called personally.
Not his office. He's
He said He was screaming.
BEN: You know how important
this fucking movie is to me?
I got alimony, I got child support,
I can't afford to lose this movie.
I'm fucking drowning. I gotta find.
- You talk to Bruce?
- Yes. Let me finish this, we'll discuss it.
- I've got to know.
- I'm done in 5, 10 minutes.
- I'm trying to relax.
- I have been driving around.
- You should have one.
- I don't need one.
The feet are connected to the soul.
I gotta know. I gotta know.
I'll be done in 5, 10 minutes.
I'm trying to relax.
You should have one.
- Five minutes.
- Five minutes.
DICK:
That's good.
BEN: No, no, no. I'm waiting for him.
I'm waiting for him.
I'm just
[GIRLS SPEAKING IN
FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
DICK:
Oh.
[PHONE RINGING]
Excuse me.
- Yeah.
BEN: Yeah, Dick, enough.
Come on. What's happening? Did
you tell him he has to shave or not?
- Tell him the consequence if he didn't?
- Yes.
What'd he say?
He told me that he hopes
I contract pancreatic cancer.
and die a slow, withering death.
BEN: He's a beauty.
What'd he say after he calmed down?
- He said, "You gutless little turd."
- Oh, no. Then what did he say?
[LAUGHS]
"You're fired."
Oh, wow, terrible, terrible. I mean
- My biggest client.
- Did he say?
My biggest paying client,
the one responsible for my mortgage
- . hang up the phone.
- Oh, man, I'm sorry.
Man, you are strong. I don't know
how you do it, I admire you.
He add anything else about the movie?
The beard? The weight? Anything?
Can't you let this moment
be about me?!
Yeah, okay, it's about you. Right.
It's about you. I forgot.
My moment. Not yours, mine.
I lost him, I lost my biggest fucking
client. The man I made. He fires me?
- He hangs up. The man responsible
- Hold on.
I'll be right back.
DICK: I am not where you going?
- Be right back.
- Where you going? Where you going?
- I'll be right back.
I'm gonna just go outside
for a second, all right?
DICK:
Relax.
DICK [ON PHONE]:
Ben, what are you doing?
I thought I saw something.
MAN: It's just business, business,
business.
[PLAYING ORGAN]
Hi, Zoe. What are you doing here?
Oh, God.
Terrible, terrible thing.
Yeah, it's the worst.
I didn't know you knew him.
I didn't know you knew Jack.
- You knew him?
- Yeah, I knew him.
How?
Well, it's really not the time.
Is that tie Jack's?
For God's sakes, it's 10:00 in the
morning, you should be in school.
- Ben All right.
- Not now.
Something important to talk about.
We'll talk later.
Why not.? No, let's do it now.
Let's get it over with. Wanna do it now?
- No, no, no.
- Fine. I'm ready.
We'll do it after the service.
It's all right.
I mean, when did you and Jack
have time to know each other?
Does that matter now?
Honey, I know, I know.
But was there any intimacy?
Really, what's the difference?
I mean, does that really matter now?
It makes a big difference.
He blew his brains out.
I'm sorry. That was harsh, but.
I mean, I don't know, an agent?
He was wonderful.
He taught me so much about me.
He took drugs.
He touched me.
Where?
Everywhere.
You're a kid.
MAN 1:
Hey, Ben.
[MAN SPEAKING SPANISH]
Nice crowd.
Jack has never been so hot.
Believe me, most of Colombia
is grieving.
MAN 1: If I only had one-tenth
of Jack's pussy. One-tenth.
Where did he find them?
High school?
- So young.
MAN 2: So full of shit.
RABBI: Few people knew and truly
understood Jack as well as this man.
Morning.
Oh, my God. He looks even thicker
and hairier than he did yesterday.
BRUCE:
So young, so final.
Jack Gregory Levine McDonagh.
Not just an agent.
I see so many people out here.
that I'd rather be eulogizing today
than Jack.
[CROWD LAUGHS]
When a life gets cut short
we all feel saddened.
But when it had the promise
that Jack exhibited.
in an industry that, let's face it.
is often known for mercilessly
devouring and punishing its own.
But Jack transcended
his competition.
I have never seen so many agents
from other agencies.
attend a funeral for one of
their most wicked competitors.
My first reaction was to assume
that most of you were here
to steal Jack's clients.
while they were still
in a weakened condition...
rather than pay your respects.
[WHISPERING] You know that stuff
you take when you have to pack?
- You know.?
- [WHISPERING] Klonopin?
If I could have one.
But I see true respect and love here.
Everybody knows
this is a tough town.
Hunter S. Thompson
once said to me:
"Bruce, my boy, the movie business
is a cruel and shallow money trench.
where thieves and pimps run free
and good men die like dogs."
And then he added,
"There's also a negative side."
[CROWD LAUGHS]
Tomorrow at 4,
he shaves that fucking beard.
or the whole picture goes down.
BRUCE:
when the feared studio head died.
The turnout at that funeral
was massive.
And Billy Wilder was asked:
"Why did so many people show up
for such a hated man?"
And Mr. Wilder said,
"It's that old showbiz adage.
'Give the audience what they want
and they'll come."'
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
Hey, Ben. Ben.
- Hey.
- Scott.
- I think if we talk, you know, terms
- Yeah.
- Oh, are we negotiating?
- No, we'll save that for later.
You wanna negotiate?
Later. You wanna talk about
my ex-wife later?
- No. What are? What do you mean?
- Later?
You sleep in my ex-fucking-bed
with my ex-fucking-Wife
in my ex-fucking house,
and you wanna negotiate?
- No, no, no!
- And I don't care?
What's wrong with you,
you little shitbag?
All you'll be able to do is write
tampon jingles, you hear me, fuckface?
Tampon jingles, you fucking hack.
[SCOTT SCREAMING]
- Are you all right?
- Sure.
- For a minute I thought you were
- What?
Nothing.
Anyway, so remember
that florist movie?
There's a star attached now.
and frankly, I would much rather
have you produce it than Leonard.
No, no. Who do you think I am?
I mean
I don't understand. You wanna throw
this opportunity my way? Why?
Well, my agent thought
it would be good business.
You're the guy who could get money
and run interference on this one.
- Frankly, I agree.
- Out of the question.
- Why?
- Why? Well, I believe...
There's a couple of things that
you and I would need to sort out first.
- Sure. Like what?
- Like you're seeing my ex-wife.
You've been divorced.
- . for a year and a half.
- Doesn't matter.
You almost married somebody else
So what? It's not right.
It doesn't feel right.
It's wrong. I mean, Scott,
for God's sakes, you're married.
What difference does that make?
I'm not happy.
Not happy.
Is this a feeling
that you're unfamiliar with?
- I'm gonna have to think about this.
- Fine.
By the way, who's the actor
in the florist movie?
- Brad Pitt.
- He's in?
SCOTT: Hundred percent.
- Brad Pitt as a florist. He'd be good.
SCOTT:
Sure would.
I already have a couple of thoughts.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
RABBI: Ladies and gentlemen, one last
custom before we leave this place.
I wanna invite all of you
after the family
to come forward and to lay
a blanket of soil over Jack's casket.
That every one of us
should lay him to rest in peace.
And after that, we'll sing,
I'll chant a prayer.
BRUCE:
Wouldn't stand there if I was you.
It couldn't be helped.
Look, I'm certain we're both making
more out of this than is necessary.
I told you. Answer's no.
"No" means the picture
is as dead as Jack.
That's not good for you or me.
BRUCE:
We'll see.
Look.
You're just a producer.
You're just the fucking mayonnaise
in a bad sandwich.
They're gonna crush your nuts.
Yeah, I don't think
that's gonna happen.
- We'll see.
- Get the fuck away from me, will you?
I'd hate to have to fucking
beat you to death right here.
[SINGING IN HEBREW]
[SOBBING]
[DICK GRUNTING]
MAN:
He just hit him.
SCOTT:
Dick.
MAN 2: Come on. Lift up.
SCOTT: Dick! Dick!
MAN 2:
Come on.
SCOTT: Dick, come on.
MAN 2: Dick.
- Dick. Dick.
MAN 3: There you go.
Come here.
[DICK GRUNTING]
[CHATTERING]
CAL: Here's what happened. He went
right from the car to his trailer.
BEN: What did he look like?
- Hard to tell.
He had a hat, sunglasses
with a scarf, kept his back to everyone.
That Makeup guy and his assistant
are the other ones in the trailer.
- Door's locked.
- Did the Teamster who drove see him?
Said he didn't notice.
I ran into him yesterday
at Jack's funeral.
Well?
Not good.
[BELL RINGING]
MAN 1: All right.
MAN 2: That's perfect.
Sid has asked me to come out
to support you guys.
But he's adamant, if the status is quo,
this baby goes down.
Let's be patient.
We're gonna be ready in 10.
MAN 3: Allison, let's make sure
first take is set.
- "If the status is quo"?
- It's a new breed.
God.
MAN:
Ready on the set, sir.
He'll be out in a minute.
Huh?
Two.
We're almost there.
I'm betting beard.
What kind of remark is that?
People's livelihoods are at stake.
Make a note:
Producer with a conscience.
They say, you know, we're measured
by how we handle adversity.
Okay, you're gonna have to stop it,
all right? You're gonna have to stop it.
CAL:
Have one, calm the nerves.
Why not, what the hell?
It's only been 30 years.
Okay, that's it, here we are!
Let's go!
Fuck.
Come on!
[ALL GROANING]
Hey, how about we get this fucker
on the road, huh?
[CREW CHEERING]
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
[CHATTERING]
JOHNNY:
Ben, you did it!
[JEREMY SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
Ben, Ben, I'd like to introduce
you to Mary and Mary.
They're kind of young.
Not really, 16 and 16 is 32.
Aba knows numbers.
Aba knows numbers, babe.
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
[BARKS]
Hey, how are you?
So I hear we made some changes.
BEN:
Yes, well, just some nips and tucks.
- So long as we kept our edge.
- Yeah, the edge, we saved the edge.
BEN:
Get any sleep on the plane?
JEREMY: I'm certainly optimistic.
BEN: Good, optimistic is good.
Yeah, no.
I haven't seen his final cut.
You haven't seen his cut?
- No.
- Well, I think it's great.
- It's finally there.
- Yeah.
- It's been a long hard one, but
- Yeah.
No, but you guys
have been great about it.
Well, thank you.
We're so lucky to have him.
[MC SPEAKING IN FRENCH ON PA]
MC:
Sean Penn.
Thank you.
[MC SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
They like him.
They do.
There's a seat on the jet
if you want to come back with us.
Wheels up, 2 a.m. sharp.
- I'll get you the tail number, the details.
- Good. Okay.
- Nice job.
- Finally got my priorities straight.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
IN FILM]
[FOOTSTEPS IN FILM]
[CROWD LAUGHING]
[TIRES SCREECH IN FILM]
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
IN FILM]
[GUNSHOT]
[SNIFFLES]
[BARKING]
SEAN: Father, forgive them,
they know not what they do.
[BARKING]
No!
[CROWD GASPING]
[GUNSHOT]
[WOMAN SPEAKING FRENCH]
[GUNSHOT]
[CROWD GASPING]
[GUNSHOT]
MAN 1:
Bravo.
[CROWD BOOING]
MAN 2:
Bravo!
[CROWD CHEERING]
[CAMERAS CLICKING]
[BARKS]
ABA:
Too soon. Too soon.
You know, Lou...
I gotta say
And I've given this
some real thought.
LOU: You've given it a thought.
Refreshing.
After seeing the movie tonight
with a fresh head.
- . it really kind of grew on me.
- Please.
- And you know what?
- No.
I think the ending
had a lot of courage.
Lot of courage.
That's good to know.
[DRIVER SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
Excuse me?
DRIVER:
It's a beautiful night in Cannes.
Yes.
[PHONE RINGS]
- Hello.
KELLY: Hello?
- Hello.
- Ben?
- Ben?
- Hey, Kelly.
Hi. Hi.
You know the big sofa chair? It just
came back from the upholsterer.
and when I sat in it,
it made me think of you.
So I thought I'd call and see how
everything went with the screening.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was okay.
- So the chair came back?
- Yeah, this morning.
What sort of fabric?
It's a beautiful
red boucle fabric. Gorgeous.
Bright red.
You know, I always thought
it was great just the way it was.
I felt like a change.
- Passport.
- He needs also the tail number.
Okay. Yeah, hi.
Just hold on a second.
It's 2112F. Two-one-one-two F.
[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
[GUARD SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
What's he saying?
What's he saying?
He says the plane already gone.
No, it can't be gone
because I'm on it, so.
DRIVER: But
BEN: It's 2112F.
Ben, Ben, Ben.
[BOTH SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
BEN: No, no, I can't.
- He says this is your plane.
Whoa! Whoa!
Lou. Lou, it's me. Lou, Lou. Wait.
[JET ENGINE ROARING
ON PHONE]
Hey, hey. Lou.
Hey, hey, hey.
Hello, hello, hello.
Ben, what just happened?
- Hello, Kelly?
- Hello, hello.
Oh, yeah, there's a lot of congestion
at the airport.
- You know, a lot of traffic.
- Okay.
Yeah. Yeah, you know, I think that
I'm gonna stay here a couple of days.
I heard about this French bistro
on the water.
I thought, you know,
why not soak up the culture?
Life's not bad.
I'm in France. Life is good.
Well, I'm jealous.
- So the chair came back?
- Yeah, this morning.
Yeah, but red, honey,
I can't picture that.
I like it. It's really pretty.
No, I just well, all right.
No, it's your chair.
I know that now, I know that.
You actually said,
"It's your chair and I know that now."
That's amazing.
Thank you so much for realizing that.
So I'll let you go.
Okay. I'll see you when I see you.
Okay. Okay, I'll call you
when I get back.
Bonjour.
BEN: Remember
the Vanity Fair photo shoot?
Hey, Todd.
I saw that thing on the Internet
about your preview not doing so well.
- Hey, hang in there.
- Thanks. That's all bullshit anyway.
Went like gangbusters.
Over on the wall
and on the table are charts...
which indicate where
you've been designated to stand.
BEN: I was promised
that I'd stand between...
...the O and the W, where Stuart is.
But once word leaked out
about the screening in Cannes,
I was sent way over by the P.
Inches away from being
completely out of the business.
WOMAN: Actually, Ben, the P.
Yeah, you can go over near the P.
Right. The other way. Yeah. No, left.
My left, your right.
It's actually the other side.
If you go right on the other side. That's
good. A little farther. Little farther.
Right. If you'd switch with Todd.
Little farther.
Little farther. Little bit more.
You're near the P.
Great. Yeah, that's right.
On the other side. Yeah.
MAN:
This is Fiercely, 6M-6. Take 3.
MAN: This is Fiercely,
cue 1 M-1. Take 1.
BEN:
Vanity Fair named me...
...as one of the 30 most powerful
producers in the business.
WOMAN: Over on the wall there and
on the table are charts which indicate...
...where each of you
has been designated to stand.
BEN: Power is an elusive term,
but in Hollywood, it's everything.
I don't care
what they say.
You either have it, want it,
or you're afraid of losing it.
Where you stand at these things
or who you may be standing next to...
...may not seem like the most
important thing, but it really matters.
- Congratulations.
- A bit awkward...
...but I was wondering if some changes
could be made to the placements.
- It's...
- Right.
Some of these people
are not really...
..."producer" producers,
if you know what I mean.
They just put their names
on the movies...
...but they don't really do anything.
BEN: You see, recently,
over a two-week period...
...my career, hell, my whole life,
was severely tested.
Let's just say my power credentials
were on the line, bigtime.
MAN 1 [IN MOVIE]: In his wacky crazy
kooky world, Charlie...
BEN: And it all started in Costa Mesa
at a preview of a film I produced.
MAN 2 [IN MOVIE]:
I can't feel my legs.
BEN:
The movie was titled Fiercely.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
IN MOVIE]
[BIRDS SQUAWKING]
BEN: These test screenings
with an audience are critical.
Always a lot of production people,
always a lot of marketing executives...
...and of course the studio chief,
Lou.
If the number is high,
there's a celebration...
...if the number is low,
and the preview cards stink...
...well, let's just say
many people will suffer.
She'll make sure of it.
I needed this one to work.
WOMAN [IN MOVIE]:
I know.
Go.
[GUNSHOT]
[DOG BARKING]
[BARKING]
I'm not gonna beg.
You think I care about me?
You think it's me I care about?
It's you I worry about.
I think they should kill him.
SEAN [IN MOVIE]:
Your salvation.
Father, forgive them,
they know not what they do.
[SLURPING]
[DOG BARKING]
No!
[AUDIENCE GASP]
MAN 2:
Oh, my God.
WOMAN 1:
They shot the dog. Poor thing.
WOMAN 2:
They shot the dog?
MAN 3:
Let's go.
WOMAN 3:
Excuse me. Excuse me.
[BIRDS SQUAWKING]
[GUNSHOT IN FILM]
MAN 4: Okay. How about that,
ladies and gentlemen?
What do you think? Listen, we'll just
ask you to remain in your seats...
...for just a few minutes
while we hand out these cards.
Will you hand out the cards,
please?
We appreciate you
taking the time to stick around...
...give us your thoughts. You are part
of the filmmaking process...
...and we value whatever it is
you have to say.
I want to remind you guys,
this is a test screening.
That's gonna mean
there's some post production.
When they're done, you want me to put
the cards and numbers in your car?
You can, you know how I feel. I don't
pay much attention to the numbers.
- You don't think they're relevant?
- No, Carl, we're here to lead.
Sure, sure, sure.
I noticed a couple of the shots...
...right before Sean Penn gets killed
were taken out of The Third Man.
Like, the way the dog
crosses between his legs...
...it's the same thing
with Harry Lime and the cat.
It's like he's, you know, he's building
upon what Carol Reed originally did
Ben. Ben. Ben, thank you for
allowing me to be part of this.
Fantastic. It's fantastic.
Big foreign upside.
Jimmy.
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
Ben, I'd like to introduce you to Jimmy.
Jimmy, Ben. Ben, Jimmy.
We just met, yes.
Jimmy wants to invest
in the next one.
Oh, that's good.
Where'd he get his money?
- Hair.
- Oh, hair?
- Hair.
- That's good to know.
- Yeah. More than 70 shops.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
- Well, let me think about that.
- Good. Good. Okay.
- Good.
Glad you guys liked the movie.
- Thank you. Nice to meet you.
JIMMY: Good job. Nice to meet you.
BOB: The length is the very least
of its problems, I guarantee.
- Sitting in there, you hear the people?
DICK: What about Sean?
BOB: That was brutal. Unrelenting.
DICK: Sean was Sean, it was...
BOB: The air was sucked out of the
room halfway through the damn thing.
I thought the girl was very, very good.
Didn't you?
BOB:
Please.
Blood, body parts,
heartbreaking sadness.
- How am I supposed to sell this thing?
DICK: Let's be positive.
- This could be the year for grief.
BOB: Grief for who?
They shot the dog in the head.
Hey, Ben.
It's good to see you, Bob.
- Dick, what are you doing here?
- I represent the girl.
She's gonna be a star.
I thought preview policy
was no agents?
I snuck in, I'm gonna sneak out.
So?
Yes?
What did you think?
Well, I thought there was
a lot of interesting stuff to...
I loved the music.
It's still in my head.
Thanks.
MAN:
Here you go.
DAWN: It's almost there, Ben. If Jeremy
would just cooperate with the cut...
...and we get lucky with the reviews,
we got a chance.
We'll deal with all this tomorrow.
I just gotta talk to Lou, it's time.
LOU: Ben. Where's your director?
- Hello.
Missed his plane at Heathrow, he's sick
about it. It'll be in tomorrow morning.
It's hard to produce
a good movie, Ben.
Very.
- Sean. Just brilliant.
SEAN: Hey.
- Brilliant work.
- Thanks. Hey, Ben.
You're never not great,
you're just great.
- Think we got a shot?
- Absolutely. Jeez.
- Well, we'll see.
LOU: Yeah.
BEN: I'll see you later.
LOU: Okay, I'll see you in Cannes.
- Did you work out the G5?
LOU: Yes.
I gotta smoke on the plane.
- We're gonna lose money.
- How do you know?
- A lot of money.
- You know this before it's done?
That's right.
- Even before the DVD comes out?
- Pretty much.
[HARMONICA MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
[MUSIC STOPS]
[HAZARD LIGHT CLICKING]
[ALARM CLOCK CHIMING]
I did try to call Jeremy
after the screening.
MAN: You seemed reluctant.
- I was not.
He's the director, for God's sakes.
If I did say:
"Fuck me, why should this be easy?"
That doesn't mean I'm not enthusiastic.
- You're feeling good about last night?
- Yes.
As I was saying,
I am very enthusiastic...
...and it's a little too soon
to get excited...
...but all signs to me say,
between us, through the roof.
- Through the roof? That's great.
- Yeah.
- That's great.
- Did you see this?
- About Jack?
- Yeah, did you hear about it?
- Yeah, I couldn't believe it.
- Yeah.
Yeah, it's terrible.
I'm looking at this headline.
Who would have guessed?
He was doing so well, right?
"Ten percenter
puts himself in turn around."
Bad joke.
Yeah, it's page one, that's cold.
But you still gotta admit
it's pretty funny, don't you think?
I can see how sympathetic you are.
Argh.
Oh, come
I'm on my way.
Yeah, I'll be there in two minutes.
No, I'm not late at all.
I'm not late, they'll be there
in plenty of time. That I promise.
They will be there on time. Hello?
Hello? Hello?
MAX:
Hi, Daddy.
- Morning, gorgeouses.
SOPHIE: Hi, Daddy.
Who dresses you guys?
MAX: We do.
SOPHIE: We do.
MAX: Mom wants to ask you something.
BEN: Now?
SOPHIE: She said it's okay
for you to go in the house...
...instead of using your cell phone.
BEN: Okay, I'll be right back.
Get in the car
and buckle yourselves up.
SOPHIE:
Okay.
BEN:
Kelly, I said I would do it.
You always say you'll do it,
but you don't.
I know, I'm under siege. I realize I
always say it, but this time it's true.
- For all of us.
- I'll do it, I'll take the kids this weekend.
A grand total of 90 minutes per day
of video and TV.
- Or the kids can't stay over.
- I know.
BEN: Where's the old sofa chair?
- I'm having it re-covered.
- I miss it.
- You miss the chair?
I love that chair.
I sat in it all the time.
I even remember
how much I paid for it.
Okay, Ben, let's play by the rules.
I thought our last session
went really well, didn't you?
Yeah, but this therapy is called
"How to Learn to Live Apart."
So we can move on gracefully.
Well, I still have feelings.
So do I.
That dark green velvet
was such a good look for that chair.
What? I felt like a change.
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Can I call you?
[SIGHS]
Yeah. Of course.
BEN:
Okay. See you later, guys.
SCOTT: Hey, Ben.
- Scott.
- So how were the numbers last night?
- Just a number.
SCOTT: Oh, by the way,
I just finished my script.
BEN:
So, what is it?
Come on, don't play hard to get,
tell me.
I'm not gonna tell you.
I'm not gonna tell you.
BEN:
I'm gonna find out anyway.
SCOTT: It's about a florist.
- Oh, no.
SCOTT:
It's a rich world.
A flower shop as a background
for ambivalence and deceit.
It's the Rose Bowl Parade meets
The Da Vinci Code. That kind of thing.
- It's not a movie.
- It's not a movie? What is it?
Flowers on the big screen?
I don't think so. Won't work.
- Try Leonard, it might be his thing.
- I already did.
BEN: You went to Leonard
before you went to me?
He's the coach
of my kids' soccer team.
Scott, come on. Leonard?
What difference does it make
if you're not interested?
Loyalty matters to me.
What did Leonard say?
There were
some very interesting aspects.
What did he say?
- He said it's not a movie.
- There you have it.
SCOTT: It's too bad about Jack, huh?
- It's rare.
Usually agents kill others,
not themselves.
- Yeah, but out of the blue? I mean...
- It happens, you know.
- Suicide, it happens?
- Stress, it builds up. I'll see you later.
See you later.
MAN [ON STEREO]:
This is Fiercely, cue 4M-2. Take 7.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[PHONE RINGS]
BEN: Cal, talk to me,
what happened at the rehearsal?
CAL: You're not gonna believe it. Bruce
shows up with a Grizzly Adams beard.
He's got a Grizzly Adams beard?
Yes, and he's a pig.
You want to direct him?
That's not my job.
What do you mean he's a pig?
- He's fat.
- Bruce Willis is overweight?
Overweight,
with a Grizzly Adams beard.
- He's fooling with you.
- The biggest beard you've ever seen.
- Don't worry.
- There's no way to know it's Bruce.
I will see you this afternoon.
I'm at a production meeting right now,
I can't talk. Goodbye.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I think Mom's in the back
if you want to say hi.
Do I have to?
Your eyes are all red.
No. No.
- A little bit.
- Just Just stuff, you know.
If it's boy stuff,
you can always talk to me about it.
I know some things
your mother doesn't know.
- I'm sure you do.
- No, seriously, you can ask me.
- Okay. Yeah.
- Yeah?
Okay. I'll be right back.
BEN:
What's with Zoe?
Oh, girl stuff. I don't know.
Is she dating? Parties or anything? She
doesn't really tell me much.
she just kind of
keeps things to herself.
I think she gets that from you.
I think she tells us about.
as much about what she does as
you would tell me about what you do.
Secrets seem to be
the family hobby.
I think it's in the DNA.
Boy, this place has gone way up.
I wished I still owned it.
Yeah, but you don't.
Gotta go.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- Looking good, Ben.
- You too.
Bye.
ZOE: You know,
it's not every 17-year-old...
who still has their dad
drive them to school.
I kind of like it.
It makes me feel like a kid.
BEN: You are a kid, and I'm a lucky guy.
I still get to drive you to school.
Think you'll still pick me up
and drop me off when I go to college?
You bet, if you'll let me.
I don't know,
let's just say it's negotiable.
I'm a good negotiator.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
Will you please stop saying,
"If they don't fuck up my cut.
we may have something
we don't mind putting our names on"?
- I know that.
JEREMY: Look, mate.
I don't want to get
too lofty or nothing about it.
but I made a film that doesn't wallow
in the cliches of retribution.
I don't want to satisfy
the audience.
- by letting them get even.
- That's true.
- I didn't do that when you hired me.
- That's true.
But let's just say that when those that
put up the money finally see.
the bad guys get away
and the little dog get murdered...
they get concerned.
Look, for my part,
if the dog gets shot in the head, fine.
If the kids all love it and laugh,
even better.
Probably that'll never happen. Kids
You know what's gonna happen.
Fucking hell. Didn't you?
You said to me, that Lou said,
and I quote:
- "It's a good movie"?
- She did, three times.
And that concerns you?
- A bit.
- How's that?
Jeremy, I don't know what "good"
means in South London.
but north of Pico
at a preview screening.
where Lou says "good" three times,
drop your pants.
bite down hard,
this one's gonna hurt.
I'm not buying it, mate. Come on.
I mean, you know...
[SIGHS]
I mean, were you watching
the audience watch the movie?
- Of course I was.
- What was their overall reaction?
Like they took their kids to Disneyland,
watched Mickey Mouse...
douse himself with gasoline
and set himself on fire.
[LAUGHS]
I'm actually all right with that.
It's like, what? What we got?
Like, two weeks to red carpet, right?
The festival took the film because they
want stars. Only saw a 10-minute reel.
The studio could pull it
from the festival with a phone call.
JEREMY:
Now you're overheating, mate.
I don't think so. We're gonna have to
accommodate Lou in some way.
Throw her a bone, something,
or the road could get a bit weird.
JEREMY: What, you're saying
now you're not gonna protect my cut?
I'm gonna protect your cut.
DAWN: That's what Ben does.
BEN: Thank you.
I just want you to understand
the terrain we're about to cross.
- The preview was terrifying.
JEREMY: All right, look.
Just stand united and we'll prevail.
Yeah, you know.
I'll explain the whole sort of raison
d'etre thing to Lou and she'll listen.
- All right?
- All right. I'm here to support you.
JEREMY: Look, all I'm saying is, and I
don't mean to flog it, but, you know.
I think you should be proud.
We went out on a limb on this one.
BEN:
I am proud.
JEREMY: Yeah, well,
it's not just about the money, is it?
BEN: We already got the money,
now we gotta get the money back.
JEREMY:
Morning, all.
In the end, no director, no stars,
not even a title, just a number.
A big number.
LOU:
You're really good.
My God, kill the dog.
Of course.
What a brilliant tactical move.
You know, Ben,
I always sensed you were blessed.
with good instinctive negotiating
skills, but killing the dog? Oh, boy.
Well, we wanted
to do the unexpected.
JEREMY:
What a surprise, eh? No, that's
Sometimes you just gotta muss up
their hair and kick them in the balls...
- . just to make sure they're breathing.
- Easy. Easy, big fella.
LOU:
A bargaining chip.
You figured, leave the dead dog
in the movie now.
knowing it wasn't in the script,
I'd cut it out and say:
"Okay, Lou, dog stuff's gone,
how about we just
keep the rest of the stuff as it is,
and call it a day?"
I'm too old for this.
Well, Lou, I think there's
another way to look at it too.
What are you saying?
We've got a problem.
Hold on. Hold on, you're not gonna
touch my ending, now are you?
I mean, that's not what I'm hearing,
is it?
- Did anyone see Amores Perros?
- What?
JEREMY:
Amores Perros, did you see it?
I mean, what's that film about?
Cruelty? No.
It's about reality, and about loss.
And, you know, I mean, look.
the simple thing is
you can make a film.
that has a bit more
profundity to it, you know.
and something that people
will actually remember.
or the same old
load of bollocks, really.
I mean, I thought we were
trying to do something great.
No? I mean, I toned it down.
I've done that.
I mean, I toned it way down.
- Didn't I? With that scene.
- He did.
Serious problem.
Look, the dog has to die.
Trust me, kemosabe,
you gotta back up.
LOU: I'm sorry, maybe I'm not
being clear, maybe
Sorry, excuse me, I don't think Sean
would have done the movie
if it weren't hard-hitting
and didn't take some real risks.
- Absolutely.
LOU: Would you excuse us?
Now, please?
Look, I've lost $25 million before.
. I'll lose $25 million again.
We've managed to put together
extensive notes for you.
Very extensive. If you do the kind of
work that needs to be done.
I'll lose a little less.
Maybe $15 million less.
So you're asking me
to eviscerate my film.
so you can lose
a little less money?
- I would be very appreciative.
- I can't do that.
Well, let us chew on this.
No, look, the dog dies!
- I don't think so.
- Are you taking the piss now?
No, not really.
Listen, let's not make this
even more awkward than it is.
- We respect you. Fix it.
- It's not broken.
- My guts are in that cut, mate. Right?
- I know.
Right?
LOU:
Listen, do the right thing. Okay?
- Oh, the right thing, now, is it?
LOU: The right thing.
I'm sorry, does he have final cut?
Um Um No.
- The right thing.
JEREMY: What?
Or your big evening in Cannes
will be canceled...
and I'll take the movie away
from you and recut it myself.
Jeremy. Jeremy. Jeremy.
No, no, don't Please, don't
Stop. Take it easy, take it easy.
That's not the way.
Take it easy. Get ahold of yourself.
- Get ahold of yourself.
- What do you suggest?
BEN:
Well, he'll come around. He's fine.
He'll be fine. It's jet lag.
I'll take care of it, it's okay. Come on.
- Get a grip.
- I just.
[SOBBING]
Let's just Let's just go.
- We don't have much time.
BEN: I'll take care of it.
[JEREMY SOBBING]
LOU:
Do you believe this?
BEN: Yeah, I saw it. Had 10 percent
of the brass ring, didn't he?
I'd fuck him.
My old bed. God, I love this bed.
Are these new sheets?
- This is a huge mistake.
- Don't say that.
No, I just I can't do this.
I can't do this. This is.
And this is as much my fault
as yours.
This is why we're seeing Dr. Randall,
to not do this.
Let's not tell her.
Why are you so comfortable
after almost a year, and I'm nervous?
- Why is that?
- You still look fantastic.
I appreciate that.
You want me to go?
- Yes, no.
- I won't talk.
No, I'd like to talk.
- Good, let's talk. I'll start.
- Okay.
I admit, I do love this bed
but only with you in it.
Even if only for a moment,
I'm just so grateful to be back here.
- Really?
- Truly.
I don't know, all the lawyers
and everything, it's so
- It's awkward, you know?
- And all the money.
Yeah. I don't know.
It's just been so long.
I just feel like if I could do this,
I feel so vulnerable and.
I know how you feel.
It's complicated.
I don't feel just one way, you know?
I understand.
I never feel just one way.
- Really?
- Truly.
I.
[PHONE RINGING]
- This could be important.
- If you could only focus.
- If you could just focus.
- Let's both hold on to that thought.
- Hello?
CAL: I have him.
- Who?
- Him.
- Who?
- Bruce Willis.
Oh, yeah? Okay, good, good.
BRUCE: Hello?
- Hey. Amigo.
BRUCE:
I heard something.
- What?
- Concern about my beard.
- Or is it buyer's remorse?
- What?
Hang on a second, wait a second.
I have to I'll be right back.
It's business.
He's a fucking movie star.
- I got issues to resolve.
- What?
Like shaving the beard, it's like
It sounds crazy, but it's a big deal.
I don't know what to do.
Tell him you'll call him back.
Be a man.
- You're right, you're right. Hello?
- Hello.
- Hey, hey, there you are.
- I'm all ears.
Listen, did I tell you how truly happy
I am that you're doing this movie?
- A lot of actors were circling this, but
- Get to the point.
Can you give me five seconds?
I gotta deal with something.
- What? Yeah.
- Thanks.
- You're kidding, right?
- No, come on, Kelly.
Kelly. Kelly.
- Hello? Yeah, I'm back.
- Hello.
- We should talk about this.
- We do need to talk.
No, I think face to face.
Face to face is always better.
You're absolutely right.
Could you just give me five seconds?
Five seconds?
Kelly? Kelly. Kelly. Kelly.
[PHONE HANGS UP]
Hello? Hello?
Kelly!
Kelly.
BEN: Jeremy,
I'm coming to the editing room.
I know we have things to talk about.
You know,
I have some problems of my own.
- You get our star?
- I've left voice mails at every number.
- What's this?
- Oh, I'm just referencing the cards.
These aren't Hallmark cards, Carl.
- This isn't magazine material.
- Okay.
- This is private business.
- Yeah, I mean, I thought that
- Put them in a drawer, lock them up.
- Okay. All right.
You let somebody in the office
without discussing with me first?
- No, no
- Let's get a grip. Come on.
- What are we doing? Falling apart.
- No, he's from Studio Services.
I can't believe this.
After one bad screening?
You gotta be kidding me.
Son of a bitch, I can't
People have no shame.
Ruthless pricks.
- Who's moving in here?
- What?
Who is moving in here?
What production company?
- Who is coming in here, Carl?
- Oh, him.
Yeah, him, him, the guy you let in
that you shouldn't have.
CARL: No, this is for the new carpeting.
- What new carpeting?
What new carpeting? When?
What new carpeting?
- The carpet you ordered.
- I never. When was that?
Back in February.
- So it's? I ordered it in February?
- Yeah.
It takes three months
to order new carpeting?
I badgered them. It was a special order
because it was a white shag carpet.
- You know
- Carl, I don't get white shag.
You gotta be kidding me.
I wouldn't be caught dead with shag.
You said it went well
with the black chairs.
- That's why you ordered white shag.
- You're right, okay. I stand corrected.
- Really?
- Yes. I'm in the editing room. It's okay.
JEREMY:
Oh, fucking...!
You may not realize this now.
but I was protecting you
and our movie in that office.
I went out, man. I really went out.
I can see that,
but maybe that's a good thing.
No. No, I went out.
I had 11 months 22 days,
mate, right?
I had no drugs, I had no alcohol...
till after that meeting
with that cow Lou.
and your assassin in training,
your assistant.
he decides to give me an Ativan.
Well, one Ativan
doesn't sound so terrible.
Yeah, right.
Try following it up with three Dilaudids
scored from a barman.
and all washed down
with rum and Cokes, right?
Okay, then, you needed a release.
It can happen to anyone.
No, look, look.
I was seven days away
from getting a cake, man.
Right? A cake for a year sober.
Me, a cake.
And you and your diabolical
bloody naked treachery.
took that away from me.
- No, that's not true.
- Not true.
- Come on, Jeremy.
- Not true.
- Jeremy.
JEREMY: Ow!
- How's that?
- That's not necessary.
Shouldn't we save this high drama
for the big screen?
Yeah, or that one,
the one that my blood's in.
- I know that, and I'm the producer.
- My blood on that film, right?
Blood that goes all the way back
to a Jewish ghetto in Vilna...
a little shtetl.
How could you possibly understand
anything like that?
Let me get you a Valium.
Just for now. It's not that I don't
But we're on a deadline.
This is for us, these changes.
Can I have a couple of Vicodin
instead?
Sure, easy.
- Go get three of them, Ben.
- Three? Coming up.
Yeah, get me My office
to get three Vicodin.
and bring them to the cutting room
right away.
Let's put that down.
[AUDIO SCRUBBING]
Jeremy, look, we're gonna need you
to dig deep on this one.
You can do it.
We get our victory in Cannes.
I get these bastards to spend a lot
and distribute this movie properly.
- You can do it.
- It's just so fucking hard for me, man.
I mean, you know, it's my work.
It's all I've got.
Trust me, once you make
these cuts and trims.
and take out that damn dead dog,
you will feel cleansed.
You will forget the pain.
[GUNSHOT]
It's okay.
As long as we do a viewing together
before we leave, okay?
- Call me anytime you want.
- Okay. I will, Ben.
Give me a hug.
[JEREMY SOBBING]
I'm sorry.
It's okay. It's okay.
- That's okay.
- I'm sorry, Ben.
No, don't look.
I'm so scared, Ben.
We're on a deadline,
so let's get to work.
Okay? Let's get to work.
BEN: Cal, Cal, relax.
I'm coming to see Bruce.
No, no, you're not listening.
I'm driving on the 405 as we speak.
Five minutes away.
I'm driving right over the
Relax, I'm going over the hill.
I'll be there in a minute.
It doesn't matter. It'll be fine.
MAN [ON STEREO]: This is Fiercely.
Cue one and one, take one.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
MAN: I need grips and I need stand-ins.
Come on.
CAL: Ten minutes
was an hour and a half ago.
- We got a crisis here.
- Lot of traffic, lot of traffic.
I saw Moses through the window.
What's the status of the beard?
CAL: I don't know.
- Did you tell him he has to shave?
CAL: I'm gonna bring it up,
but I just haven't done it yet.
BEN: We start shooting Friday.
Today is Tuesday.
CAL: I'm the director,
I know what day it is.
I suppose it took a long time
to grow it.
Probably wants to wait
till the last minute.
That's what I thought,
but after seeing him today.
I got the sense
that this is his look.
- It's an artistic choice.
- The extra weight is too?
- It can't be.
CAL: It's a feeling.
Cal, we got the studio to pay him
$20 million to be a leading man.
For that kind of money,
there is an expectation.
CAL: They expect a good performance.
- No, no, no, Cal.
For that kind of money,
they expect millions of women.
to want intercourse with him.
Do you understand
what I'm saying?
You want a poster that says,
"See Santa run"?
Okay. Okay.
MAN 1:
We need more 4-by-8 plywood here.
BEN: Okay.
MAN 2: Watch your back.
- Okay, let's go tell him to shave.
- Okay.
Okay. He'll shave, okay?
Especially if he hears it from you.
That's the hope.
BRUCE:
Motherfuckers! Motherfuckers!
Motherfuckers!
We are talking about my fucking
artistic integrity here, goddamn it.
My artistic integrity, okay?
Audiences wanna know it's you,
Bruce. They expect it.
And we're talking about
a lot of money here.
What are you talking about?
They're not gonna recognize me?
"Where'd Bruce go, huh?
Can't see Bruce no more.
Where's my favorite movie star?
Oh, look, there he is.
I see him right there,
the guy with the beard."
Yes, but there's a
You know,
this is a certain demographic
that has to be served, Bruce.
That's the business.
You have to do it.
I mean, that's just a fact.
It's about falling in love with a hero.
There's a tradition to this stuff, Bruce,
there just is.
- Oh, I see, we're talking about pussy.
- More or less.
I understand, I understand.
Pussy's good.
Let me tell you a funny story.
I've been growing this for six months.
I've been knocking off trim 24/7,
and never one fucking complaint.
- Maybe we should listen to
- Shut up.
Hollywood producer, my ass.
I should've seen this mentality coming.
Really, should've seen it coming.
Never a doubt. Never a fucking doubt.
BEN: Bruce, Bruce, Bruce.
Come here and talk, Bruce.
Bruce, Bruce, come on.
- You wanna talk about integrity?
- Let's talk about integrity.
- Let's talk about fucking integrity.
- Let's go. Okay, let's go.
Let's talk about integrity.
I'm willing to stack my three
last pictures against your three.
How about that, huh?
Let's talk about integrity.
You don't have three pictures.
You don't have any.
You know why?
Because you're a fucking producer.
Well, why don't we start.
by giving your overblown salary
to the fucking Red Cross?
- That would show me some integrity.
- What? What?
Sorry.
Motherfuckers.
Fucking babies!
Can't fucking believe this shit.
No, no, no, you shouldn't
wear any beards.
How about this?
Why don't we just not have clothes
in the fucking movies anymore?
How about fucking paying for that?
I never realized
how strongly he felt about it.
I think he wants it.
BRUCE: This here's your fucking chair.
How's that?
You motherfuckers.
Will somebody fix this fucking door?
Jesus Christ.
You happy now
that you got my pressure up?
You fucking
BEN: Well, somehow
I don't think he expects to shave.
CAL: You know, in a very early draft,
the script mentioned he had a beard.
- A very early draft.
- Yeah.
Hey, now that video's done,
we won't be needing that shit.
Blow me, you motherfuckers!
Blow me.
- We don't have much of a choice.
- No. I don't
- The beard's not so bad anyway.
- Maybe it's not so bad.
MAN [ON STEREO]:
This is Fiercely, 6M6, take three.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
ON STEREO]
BEN:
I do, I get it, Sidney, I do.
Of all the studio heads,
you are the funniest.
- But listen
SIDNEY: Thank you, thank you.
You're welcome.
You gotta stay with me here.
This is Bruce Willis
we're talking about.
Maybe we need to bend a little,
to think creatively.
In fact, I gotta say, he might be right,
a beard might be a good idea.
You never know.
Sometimes we don't know.
- Let's keep it simple.
- Hello?
Let's keep it simple, Ben.
I'm not Lou. I like to be direct.
Yes.
Okay, tell me what I have to do.
If that bastard doesn't shave
and look like a leading man...
A, we shut the movie down,
B, we sue him for all damages.
. and C, we then sue you
for misrepresentation.
Oh, Sidney, come on.
Let's sit down and have lunch
and discuss this like men.
- Come on.
- We bought a movie star.
- Call my office.
- Sidney. Sid.
Sidney. Hello?
BEN [ON SPEAKERPHONE]: Are you
saying Bruce never mentioned this?
You're his agent,
his confidant, for God's sakes.
We're on the ledge on this one.
He's got four days to clean himself up,
and that's it.
I'll even personally pay for the trainer.
How about that?
- You have got to be kidding.
- No, no, Dick.
No, I'm not kidding, Dick,
it is happening.
- You tell me it's happening?
- Afraid so.
- It can't be.
- It is happening. Afraid so.
[DICK GAGGING]
What's that?
- What's that? Dick.
- It's nothing.
- That's nothing?
- Finish your point.
- How much does he know, huh?
- It's a bit sketchy.
We got lathered up. Things might
have been taken out of context.
- Tell me exactly what was said.
- You know how it goes:
"Fuck you." "No, no, fuck you."
And then it got worse.
Why not call me back
after you talk to him? Let's do that.
Tell him he's gonna get fired and sued
for money in his piggy bank?
I don't want to.
- You give him the bad news.
- Dick, you're an agent.
Delivering bad news
is part of the job description.
I can't do it.
The messenger gets killed.
You know that. I can't.
I've been working with him
for two years.
He's one of my most important clients,
but he's very mercurial.
- He can snap at any time.
- You're scared of him.
I'm not scared of him,
I'm scared of all of them.
- Could you hold a sec?
- Sure.
[DICK GRUNTING]
You okay?
Dick, you okay?
Maybe we should do this later.
Yeah, let's do this later.
It's a... It's a...
It's a stomach disorder.
It comes and it.
[DICK GRUNTING]
. goes.
- You sure?
- No, seriously, I'm fine.
Absolutely. They cut me back
on my antidepressants.
...so I can get it up.
But the withdrawal
makes my stomach clench.
It sounds worse than it is.
I even had to cut back Klonopin.
- When do you take that?
- Travel.
- Whenever I pack.
- Whenever you pack?
Your client has got to give us
some relief.
Let's figure out
how we can solve this beard thing.
Well, to start, why don't we let him
wear his fucking beard?
What is the big deal?
Oh, no, no, no.
Hey, Dick, we're way past that now.
Do you know the ramifications
of what you're asking of me?
I do.
[DICK GRUNTING & GAGGING]
Jesus, man,
you gotta get ahold of yourself.
You should talk to somebody
about that stomach.
- Okay, gotta go.
- Okay.
- Bye, now.
- Bye.
KELLY [ON MACHINE]: Hi, leave
a message for Kelly, Sophie or Max.
Kelly, it's Ben, just call me
on my cell anytime, anytime.
Okay, bye.
KELLY [ON MACHINE]: Hi, leave
a message for Kelly, Sophie or Max.
Kelly.
It's me. I'm on my cell.
I need to talk to you.
I'm having dinner
with some money people tonight.
but you're more important to me.
Call me on my cell
as soon as you get this.
Thank you.
[ALL SPEAKING IN
FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
- The money is in the box.
JOHNNY: Money's in the box.
Could you make the movie
in 50 days?
No.
[MEN SPEAKING
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
ABA: Well, we're sitting there drinking
with Stallone
Sly, Sly, Sly.
and Don Johnson
is sitting three tables away from us.
He'd be very good in this.
Ah.
Could you excuse me
for one moment?
- Where'd he get his money from?
- Dry cleaning.
He started by cleaning
the wardrobes for the movie studios.
He charged them like $10 a suit.
They paid.
Next time, he charged them $50 a suit.
They paid.
Next time, charged them $100 a suit.
They paid.
He said, "I wanna be in the movie
business. I understand these people."
[PHONE RINGS]
- Kelly. Kelly Oh, Kelly Excuse me.
- Sure.
I'll be right back. Yes, Kelly.
I'm so glad you called me back.
So an actor more important
than the mother of your children?
Of course I don't think
he's as important as you.
- Ten times, you called.
- No, I didn't.
I did not call you 10 times today,
I called you four times.
Well, what was so damn important?
Couldn't be me.
Look, let me find a quiet place
and I'll tell you.
I'll tell you what's so important.
I just I just
I wanted to know...
is anyone else other than you
sleeping in our old bed?
What?
You lost that privilege
over two years ago.
Wait a second, I believe 30,000
a month entitles me to something.
- You know, I gotta be frank with you.
- Fuck you.
I have never heard you say:
"Fuck you", like that to me
in front of the kids.
- What are you doing?
- The kids are sleeping.
Okay, I'm all done.
Can't we discuss this now?
I'll come over.
- No. No.
- Please? Please?
- No. No.
- Please? Please.
- Ben, no.
- Look, I'm hurting.
- You're hurting?
- Yeah, there, I've said it.
- I'm hurting.
- You really are?
Yeah, yeah, I am, I am.
Oh, hold on.
Dick, Dick, I need to talk to you.
- Yeah, I'm hurting.
- Get some fucking help.
You're right. I know it's a bad habit.
I'm working on it, believe me.
Look, can't we please
discuss it now? Please?
I have to I gotta go. I gotta go.
Okay, all right, all right.
I suppose it's not a good time.
Thanks for Yeah, we'll speak soon.
Thanks for returning my call.
DICK:
I'll have a martin I'll drink
I'll order two martinis
and have them both.
- I could use it. I could use it.
- Let's order two martinis, large.
DICK: Hi.
- Did you tell him?
Huh?
- Did you tell him?
- I eluded to it, yes.
- "Alluded"?
- I meant "allude."
I don't care what you meant.
"Alluded" or "eluded"?
- "Alluded." A-L-L-U-D-E-D.
- Yes, that's what I
- Okay.
- I hinted at it. I didn't elude.
A picture is about to get canceled.
What does that mean, "alluded"?
I told him I have something
important to discuss.
- And you told him what it was about?
- I.
A-B-O-U-T, "about"?
- Not yet.
- Not yet, okay.
- No, no.
- Sorry for the intrusion.
- What's with the patch?
- Shingles.
My lid, occasionally it flutters.
It's nothing.
I'm just glad
it's not anything serious.
[ALL LAUGH]
- Hey, if I went blind, you'd celebrate.
- Yeah, probably.
[ALL LAUGH]
I hope you know you're sitting
with a great ex-agent.
- Yeah.
- Just give me one more minute.
- Yeah.
- Excuse us.
He has lots of time.
He can sit at the bar.
How could you call
and not mention this?
There's a logic to these things.
You met him, the man's an animal.
When I called him today,
he hadn't eaten yet.
That's the wrong time.
You gotta do this
when there's an open window.
We don't have that many windows left.
When's the next window?
- After AA would be an open window.
- When's that?
- Two days.
- That's no good.
- What's tomorrow morning?
- Analysis. He'll be nuts for hours after.
You don't wanna mention lawsuit
or beard after psychotherapy.
Listen to me. I don't care.
Find a window tomorrow. That's it.
[DOOR OPENS]
I know what you think
this looks like, but it's not.
Johnny did not send me here
to make you happy.
I wanted to meet you on my own.
I know everything you've done.
I know who you are.
And I'm not just some silly girl
in tight clothes.
- I went to Stanford.
- That's a good school.
I just.
I just wanna get to know you.
BEN:
Me?
What's your name again?
- Laura.
- Laura.
I respect you and your movies.
And I know
if I don't take this chance now.
no matter how aggressive
it might seem.
my chance will never
come up again.
That's so flattering.
I mean, I guess if I were a tailor,
you'd still be doing this. Am I right?
[LAURA LAUGHS]
You are such a funny person.
And I want you to know that
there is nothing I wouldn't do.
for a chance to see you
on my own.
with no strings attached.
Unless you wanna
do something now.
BEN:
Now?
[TOILET FLUSHES]
LAURA: Well, why don't you just
call me then?
Try not to get that wet.
[BEEP]
[PHONE RINGING ON OTHER END]
KELLY [ON MACHINE]: Hi. Leave
a message for Kelly, Sophie or Max.
[ALARM CHIMES]
WOMAN [ON STEREO]: Inhale,
move forward to upward dog.
Exhale to downward dog.
Take five deep
LAURA: I can't stay for breakfast.
I have three scripts to read.
Hm.
- You wanna kiss them one more time?
WOMAN: Jump towards the front
You don't remember a thing,
do you?
I remember offering you
a two-picture deal.
And that was before
we took Ecstasy.
WOMAN: Before you do that
- I gotta go.
I dig older guys.
[PHONE RINGING]
Seventy-four, 75, 76, 77...
BEN: Hello?
CAL: Ben. Sid's office sent an e-mail
BEN: I'm not here.
- Shit.
Man, I hate that thing.
Sid wants the Bruce/beard
situation handled before the lunch.
[PHONE RINGS]
CARL: Hey, just got an e-mail.
Vanity Fair wants you.
Thirty most powerful producers
for their power issue.
How about that?
[PHONE RINGS]
CAL: Sid's office called again.
Here, I'll just read you the quote.
"I want the beard situation resolved
before the fucking lunch." End quote.
BEN: Can you call Sid's office, tell him
I'm trying to resolve this beard thing?
I'll talk to him at lunch.
WAITRESS:
I'm so sorry.
Mr. Voss's office just called
and he simply can't make the lunch.
They sent over this note.
For you.
MAN: Oh, how are you?
WOMAN: I'm doing well.
I forgot my reading glasses
in the car.
Could you read it to me, please?
Of course.
"Dear Ben,
don't think for a second...
having lunch was gonna change
a fucking.
thing.
Unless that fucking beard goes.
then we fucking shut.
the whole fucking movie down."
Betty, tell Sid I tried
to get Bruce three times.
I can't get him on the phone.
I've got a crew of 200 standing by.
- We start shooting on Friday.
BETTY: We don't have time.
I know I'm running out of time.
- You've gotta make it happen.
- Fine.
Ben? I got Kelly holding on 2.
Okay.
- Jeremy's on 3. He says it's urgent.
- Okay.
KELLY [ON PHONE]: Ben? Ben?
- Kelly, just hold on.
- Ben.
- Jeremy, talk to me.
JEREMY: You better like it, baby.
- Jeremy.
- Get here. Now. Jesus.
- I'm coming. I'm coming.
- Coming.
DAWN: Kelly.
Hi. Kelly? Kelly? Kelly?
Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go.
What's up?
Afternoon. Do I look happy?
Enough to scare me.
You like it?
It's good, I know, but it's the feather
that gets me there.
You know what I mean?
It's like me, Tonto.
the studio, the Lone Ranger, like.
I mean, I'm not gonna
fight a battle I can't win.
A fucking waste of time.
It makes no sense.
Jeremy, sometimes it takes more guts
to concede.
Have a seat. Come on.
[AUDIO SCRUBBING]
Got about 10 minutes out of this
altogether just by shaking the box.
And here comes
the dreaded ending.
[GUNSHOT]
Like the music? It contradicts
the violence, and they'll love that.
Here we go.
SEAN [IN FILM]: Father, forgive them.
They know not what they do.
- See? Now dog.
- Yeah.
Ah. Dog not shot.
Runs to master to comfort him.
[DOG WHIMPERING]
It's great.
JEREMY:
Yeah.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
- So?
BEN: That's great.
[JEREMY LAUGHING]
Wow.
- Not bad, eh?
- Not bad.
Lou will come in her pants.
- Yeah. Panties.
- Pants, actually, yeah.
Point taken. I don't know, Jeremy.
I don't know.
- How did you figure?
- That was just an outtake.
We had about 10 of them.
You remember? We could never
get that dog under control.
Lovely though he was.
I mean, it was like He loved Sean.
He was always licking his face.
- It's brilliant.
- And there you have it, you know.
Quite simple, really.
- Brilliant. Brilliant.
- Thank you.
It certainly
It changes the tone of the movie.
Yeah. No, I know what
you're gonna say. Right.
It won't mean nothing now.
The truth of it is we can take comfort
in the fact we're not gonna offend.
Jeremy, I don't get it.
- This isn't you talking.
- It's me, isn't it?
- I mean, how did you get there?
- How did I do it?
There we go. Oh, Christ.
I'll grab them later.
Those are Placidil.
And you're meant to take it
three times a day.
You could watch your old mom
get gang raped in broad daylight...
and still appreciate the weather.
Apparently the stuff works.
I gotta call Lou.
Hello? Judy?
Hello, Judy?
Is Lou there?
[PHONE RINGS]
- Yes, Ben?
- Lou.
Lou, Jeremy has done it.
Really done it.
I think we licked this bastard.
- I knew you would make this work.
- We ham-and-egged it.
Not that I doubt you,
but when can I see it?
[TOILET FLUSHES]
- You can see it whenever you want.
- Tell Jeremy I'll be by around 2.
Okay, okay, I'll tell him.
She'll be by this afternoon
with her creative team.
Pick out your tux and leisure wear...
because we're gonna be heading
for Cannes.
Where can I kiss you? Where?
Name the location. Where?
JEREMY: Placidil is not hearing.
- Great, great.
JEREMY:
Thank you, Ben.
It's nice to see you happy, mate.
Boy. Jeremy, I'm so relieved.
- Oh, me too.
- All right.
- Keep up the good Work.
- Will do, man. Absolutely.
Happy?
Yep.
BEN:
No. Dick. Dick.
You have to face this thing now.
You've gotta tell Bruce
he's gotta get rid of that beard.
You understand? Now.
Not tomorrow.
Now. Right away.
You've gotta tell
You gotta tell Bruce now.
I can't afford
to lose this movie, Dick.
Get back to me.
I thought the goal here
was not to get us back together...
but to help us feel better
about being apart.
You know, moving on gracefully.
- We share two kids.
THERAPIST: That's exactly right.
This is an exercise to help couples
separate with love.
instead of acrimony.
It's not about trying to control
the other person's behavior.
- Okay.
THERAPIST: Let's start again.
Is there anything you can think of
that you've done to Kelly.
while you were married
that you wish you didn't?
Well, that question feels so vague.
I don't know.
Okay, here's an example.
When you were married,
did you lie.
about your whereabouts
with other women?
No.
Well, there was.
Yeah, there was one time
when we were married...
when I did think of seeing Ann.
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
- And did you?
- No, no. I mean, I...
Yes, I... But nothing happened.
I just
Well, I guess I wanted to, but, hey.
You know,
I think I know what you mean.
I'm starting to feel
a little better already.
- Is that everything on this matter?
- Just about.
Not true.
The complete truth
will set you free, Ben.
Well, there was...
There was one time...
I was at a party with...
I was at a party once with Ann.
Where?
- Hm?
- Where?
In the bathroom.
You fucker.
That's very good, Ben.
Now, Kelly, it is not for you to judge.
This is just a start.
We're running short on time.
Let's give Kelly a chance.
And then next week,
we'll dig deeper.
- You ready, Kelly?
- Yes.
Did you ever use your kids
as ammunition against Ben?
No.
Did you ever have an affair
while you were married?
Absolutely not.
Okay, then. Is that all?
Well, there was
Alan's son's bar mitzvah.
I kissed Alan on the mouth
in the master bathroom.
You kissed him on the mouth?
- I mean.
- It was nothing.
Alan on the m?
What about Sheila?
- Oh, please.
- Your friend.
Please. That's all that happened.
Nothing.
- That's very good.
- I must admit, though.
I thought about it, actually.
That's very good.
What about? I mean I mean
Why don't we talk?
Aren't we gonna talk about what
we're doing to each other now?
Why don't we talk about
what we're doing?
- What?
- Why don't we talk about 'now'?
You didn't wanna talk
about 'now' before.
No. Now.
You know what. Now.
Yeah, but "now" before was not okay.
Why is "now" now okay?
I have no problem with 'now'.
You have a problem with 'now'.
- That is not why we're here.
- That's why.
Doctor, is this some classic case
of avoidance?
I'm sorry, but we're gonna have to
table this discussion until next time.
What you guys are doing takes guts,
but it is going to work.
I congratulate both of you.
You'll see.
As we dig deeper, you're gonna
feel so good about being apart.
that you're never gonna wanna
get back together.
But I'm just, you know, why?
Can't we just talk about the 'now'
for a minute?
- Like what she's doing.
- We're out of time.
She said no. She said no.
- Why can't we talk?
- Our time is up.
I know time is up.
We're paying money.
- We can't stay two more minutes?
- Thank you.
THERAPIST:
You're welcome.
Thanks.
KELLY:
Let's go. Let's go.
Let's go.
[PHONE RINGING]
[PHONE CONTINUES RINGING]
[PHONE STOPS RINGING]
Thank you.
CARL [ON PHONE]:
Hey, I've tried Dick's office.
and they say that they're gonna try
and track him down.
They'll get back to us in 10 or 15.
[BEEP]
CARL: Nobody seems to know where
Dick is. Should I call Bruce's office?
[BEEP]
CARL: I tried Bruce's office and he told
them to tell me to tell you to fuck off.
. so I don't where should I go?
[BEEP]
CARL: Ben, Sidney Voss just called.
Sidney Voss called personally.
Not his office. He's
He said He was screaming.
BEN: You know how important
this fucking movie is to me?
I got alimony, I got child support,
I can't afford to lose this movie.
I'm fucking drowning. I gotta find.
- You talk to Bruce?
- Yes. Let me finish this, we'll discuss it.
- I've got to know.
- I'm done in 5, 10 minutes.
- I'm trying to relax.
- I have been driving around.
- You should have one.
- I don't need one.
The feet are connected to the soul.
I gotta know. I gotta know.
I'll be done in 5, 10 minutes.
I'm trying to relax.
You should have one.
- Five minutes.
- Five minutes.
DICK:
That's good.
BEN: No, no, no. I'm waiting for him.
I'm waiting for him.
I'm just
[GIRLS SPEAKING IN
FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
DICK:
Oh.
[PHONE RINGING]
Excuse me.
- Yeah.
BEN: Yeah, Dick, enough.
Come on. What's happening? Did
you tell him he has to shave or not?
- Tell him the consequence if he didn't?
- Yes.
What'd he say?
He told me that he hopes
I contract pancreatic cancer.
and die a slow, withering death.
BEN: He's a beauty.
What'd he say after he calmed down?
- He said, "You gutless little turd."
- Oh, no. Then what did he say?
[LAUGHS]
"You're fired."
Oh, wow, terrible, terrible. I mean
- My biggest client.
- Did he say?
My biggest paying client,
the one responsible for my mortgage
- . hang up the phone.
- Oh, man, I'm sorry.
Man, you are strong. I don't know
how you do it, I admire you.
He add anything else about the movie?
The beard? The weight? Anything?
Can't you let this moment
be about me?!
Yeah, okay, it's about you. Right.
It's about you. I forgot.
My moment. Not yours, mine.
I lost him, I lost my biggest fucking
client. The man I made. He fires me?
- He hangs up. The man responsible
- Hold on.
I'll be right back.
DICK: I am not where you going?
- Be right back.
- Where you going? Where you going?
- I'll be right back.
I'm gonna just go outside
for a second, all right?
DICK:
Relax.
DICK [ON PHONE]:
Ben, what are you doing?
I thought I saw something.
MAN: It's just business, business,
business.
[PLAYING ORGAN]
Hi, Zoe. What are you doing here?
Oh, God.
Terrible, terrible thing.
Yeah, it's the worst.
I didn't know you knew him.
I didn't know you knew Jack.
- You knew him?
- Yeah, I knew him.
How?
Well, it's really not the time.
Is that tie Jack's?
For God's sakes, it's 10:00 in the
morning, you should be in school.
- Ben All right.
- Not now.
Something important to talk about.
We'll talk later.
Why not.? No, let's do it now.
Let's get it over with. Wanna do it now?
- No, no, no.
- Fine. I'm ready.
We'll do it after the service.
It's all right.
I mean, when did you and Jack
have time to know each other?
Does that matter now?
Honey, I know, I know.
But was there any intimacy?
Really, what's the difference?
I mean, does that really matter now?
It makes a big difference.
He blew his brains out.
I'm sorry. That was harsh, but.
I mean, I don't know, an agent?
He was wonderful.
He taught me so much about me.
He took drugs.
He touched me.
Where?
Everywhere.
You're a kid.
MAN 1:
Hey, Ben.
[MAN SPEAKING SPANISH]
Nice crowd.
Jack has never been so hot.
Believe me, most of Colombia
is grieving.
MAN 1: If I only had one-tenth
of Jack's pussy. One-tenth.
Where did he find them?
High school?
- So young.
MAN 2: So full of shit.
RABBI: Few people knew and truly
understood Jack as well as this man.
Morning.
Oh, my God. He looks even thicker
and hairier than he did yesterday.
BRUCE:
So young, so final.
Jack Gregory Levine McDonagh.
Not just an agent.
I see so many people out here.
that I'd rather be eulogizing today
than Jack.
[CROWD LAUGHS]
When a life gets cut short
we all feel saddened.
But when it had the promise
that Jack exhibited.
in an industry that, let's face it.
is often known for mercilessly
devouring and punishing its own.
But Jack transcended
his competition.
I have never seen so many agents
from other agencies.
attend a funeral for one of
their most wicked competitors.
My first reaction was to assume
that most of you were here
to steal Jack's clients.
while they were still
in a weakened condition...
rather than pay your respects.
[WHISPERING] You know that stuff
you take when you have to pack?
- You know.?
- [WHISPERING] Klonopin?
If I could have one.
But I see true respect and love here.
Everybody knows
this is a tough town.
Hunter S. Thompson
once said to me:
"Bruce, my boy, the movie business
is a cruel and shallow money trench.
where thieves and pimps run free
and good men die like dogs."
And then he added,
"There's also a negative side."
[CROWD LAUGHS]
Tomorrow at 4,
he shaves that fucking beard.
or the whole picture goes down.
BRUCE:
when the feared studio head died.
The turnout at that funeral
was massive.
And Billy Wilder was asked:
"Why did so many people show up
for such a hated man?"
And Mr. Wilder said,
"It's that old showbiz adage.
'Give the audience what they want
and they'll come."'
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
Hey, Ben. Ben.
- Hey.
- Scott.
- I think if we talk, you know, terms
- Yeah.
- Oh, are we negotiating?
- No, we'll save that for later.
You wanna negotiate?
Later. You wanna talk about
my ex-wife later?
- No. What are? What do you mean?
- Later?
You sleep in my ex-fucking-bed
with my ex-fucking-Wife
in my ex-fucking house,
and you wanna negotiate?
- No, no, no!
- And I don't care?
What's wrong with you,
you little shitbag?
All you'll be able to do is write
tampon jingles, you hear me, fuckface?
Tampon jingles, you fucking hack.
[SCOTT SCREAMING]
- Are you all right?
- Sure.
- For a minute I thought you were
- What?
Nothing.
Anyway, so remember
that florist movie?
There's a star attached now.
and frankly, I would much rather
have you produce it than Leonard.
No, no. Who do you think I am?
I mean
I don't understand. You wanna throw
this opportunity my way? Why?
Well, my agent thought
it would be good business.
You're the guy who could get money
and run interference on this one.
- Frankly, I agree.
- Out of the question.
- Why?
- Why? Well, I believe...
There's a couple of things that
you and I would need to sort out first.
- Sure. Like what?
- Like you're seeing my ex-wife.
You've been divorced.
- . for a year and a half.
- Doesn't matter.
You almost married somebody else
So what? It's not right.
It doesn't feel right.
It's wrong. I mean, Scott,
for God's sakes, you're married.
What difference does that make?
I'm not happy.
Not happy.
Is this a feeling
that you're unfamiliar with?
- I'm gonna have to think about this.
- Fine.
By the way, who's the actor
in the florist movie?
- Brad Pitt.
- He's in?
SCOTT: Hundred percent.
- Brad Pitt as a florist. He'd be good.
SCOTT:
Sure would.
I already have a couple of thoughts.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
RABBI: Ladies and gentlemen, one last
custom before we leave this place.
I wanna invite all of you
after the family
to come forward and to lay
a blanket of soil over Jack's casket.
That every one of us
should lay him to rest in peace.
And after that, we'll sing,
I'll chant a prayer.
BRUCE:
Wouldn't stand there if I was you.
It couldn't be helped.
Look, I'm certain we're both making
more out of this than is necessary.
I told you. Answer's no.
"No" means the picture
is as dead as Jack.
That's not good for you or me.
BRUCE:
We'll see.
Look.
You're just a producer.
You're just the fucking mayonnaise
in a bad sandwich.
They're gonna crush your nuts.
Yeah, I don't think
that's gonna happen.
- We'll see.
- Get the fuck away from me, will you?
I'd hate to have to fucking
beat you to death right here.
[SINGING IN HEBREW]
[SOBBING]
[DICK GRUNTING]
MAN:
He just hit him.
SCOTT:
Dick.
MAN 2: Come on. Lift up.
SCOTT: Dick! Dick!
MAN 2:
Come on.
SCOTT: Dick, come on.
MAN 2: Dick.
- Dick. Dick.
MAN 3: There you go.
Come here.
[DICK GRUNTING]
[CHATTERING]
CAL: Here's what happened. He went
right from the car to his trailer.
BEN: What did he look like?
- Hard to tell.
He had a hat, sunglasses
with a scarf, kept his back to everyone.
That Makeup guy and his assistant
are the other ones in the trailer.
- Door's locked.
- Did the Teamster who drove see him?
Said he didn't notice.
I ran into him yesterday
at Jack's funeral.
Well?
Not good.
[BELL RINGING]
MAN 1: All right.
MAN 2: That's perfect.
Sid has asked me to come out
to support you guys.
But he's adamant, if the status is quo,
this baby goes down.
Let's be patient.
We're gonna be ready in 10.
MAN 3: Allison, let's make sure
first take is set.
- "If the status is quo"?
- It's a new breed.
God.
MAN:
Ready on the set, sir.
He'll be out in a minute.
Huh?
Two.
We're almost there.
I'm betting beard.
What kind of remark is that?
People's livelihoods are at stake.
Make a note:
Producer with a conscience.
They say, you know, we're measured
by how we handle adversity.
Okay, you're gonna have to stop it,
all right? You're gonna have to stop it.
CAL:
Have one, calm the nerves.
Why not, what the hell?
It's only been 30 years.
Okay, that's it, here we are!
Let's go!
Fuck.
Come on!
[ALL GROANING]
Hey, how about we get this fucker
on the road, huh?
[CREW CHEERING]
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
[CHATTERING]
JOHNNY:
Ben, you did it!
[JEREMY SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
Ben, Ben, I'd like to introduce
you to Mary and Mary.
They're kind of young.
Not really, 16 and 16 is 32.
Aba knows numbers.
Aba knows numbers, babe.
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
[BARKS]
Hey, how are you?
So I hear we made some changes.
BEN:
Yes, well, just some nips and tucks.
- So long as we kept our edge.
- Yeah, the edge, we saved the edge.
BEN:
Get any sleep on the plane?
JEREMY: I'm certainly optimistic.
BEN: Good, optimistic is good.
Yeah, no.
I haven't seen his final cut.
You haven't seen his cut?
- No.
- Well, I think it's great.
- It's finally there.
- Yeah.
- It's been a long hard one, but
- Yeah.
No, but you guys
have been great about it.
Well, thank you.
We're so lucky to have him.
[MC SPEAKING IN FRENCH ON PA]
MC:
Sean Penn.
Thank you.
[MC SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
They like him.
They do.
There's a seat on the jet
if you want to come back with us.
Wheels up, 2 a.m. sharp.
- I'll get you the tail number, the details.
- Good. Okay.
- Nice job.
- Finally got my priorities straight.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
IN FILM]
[FOOTSTEPS IN FILM]
[CROWD LAUGHING]
[TIRES SCREECH IN FILM]
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
IN FILM]
[GUNSHOT]
[SNIFFLES]
[BARKING]
SEAN: Father, forgive them,
they know not what they do.
[BARKING]
No!
[CROWD GASPING]
[GUNSHOT]
[WOMAN SPEAKING FRENCH]
[GUNSHOT]
[CROWD GASPING]
[GUNSHOT]
MAN 1:
Bravo.
[CROWD BOOING]
MAN 2:
Bravo!
[CROWD CHEERING]
[CAMERAS CLICKING]
[BARKS]
ABA:
Too soon. Too soon.
You know, Lou...
I gotta say
And I've given this
some real thought.
LOU: You've given it a thought.
Refreshing.
After seeing the movie tonight
with a fresh head.
- . it really kind of grew on me.
- Please.
- And you know what?
- No.
I think the ending
had a lot of courage.
Lot of courage.
That's good to know.
[DRIVER SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
Excuse me?
DRIVER:
It's a beautiful night in Cannes.
Yes.
[PHONE RINGS]
- Hello.
KELLY: Hello?
- Hello.
- Ben?
- Ben?
- Hey, Kelly.
Hi. Hi.
You know the big sofa chair? It just
came back from the upholsterer.
and when I sat in it,
it made me think of you.
So I thought I'd call and see how
everything went with the screening.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was okay.
- So the chair came back?
- Yeah, this morning.
What sort of fabric?
It's a beautiful
red boucle fabric. Gorgeous.
Bright red.
You know, I always thought
it was great just the way it was.
I felt like a change.
- Passport.
- He needs also the tail number.
Okay. Yeah, hi.
Just hold on a second.
It's 2112F. Two-one-one-two F.
[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
[GUARD SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
What's he saying?
What's he saying?
He says the plane already gone.
No, it can't be gone
because I'm on it, so.
DRIVER: But
BEN: It's 2112F.
Ben, Ben, Ben.
[BOTH SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
BEN: No, no, I can't.
- He says this is your plane.
Whoa! Whoa!
Lou. Lou, it's me. Lou, Lou. Wait.
[JET ENGINE ROARING
ON PHONE]
Hey, hey. Lou.
Hey, hey, hey.
Hello, hello, hello.
Ben, what just happened?
- Hello, Kelly?
- Hello, hello.
Oh, yeah, there's a lot of congestion
at the airport.
- You know, a lot of traffic.
- Okay.
Yeah. Yeah, you know, I think that
I'm gonna stay here a couple of days.
I heard about this French bistro
on the water.
I thought, you know,
why not soak up the culture?
Life's not bad.
I'm in France. Life is good.
Well, I'm jealous.
- So the chair came back?
- Yeah, this morning.
Yeah, but red, honey,
I can't picture that.
I like it. It's really pretty.
No, I just well, all right.
No, it's your chair.
I know that now, I know that.
You actually said,
"It's your chair and I know that now."
That's amazing.
Thank you so much for realizing that.
So I'll let you go.
Okay. I'll see you when I see you.
Okay. Okay, I'll call you
when I get back.
Bonjour.
BEN: Remember
the Vanity Fair photo shoot?
Hey, Todd.
I saw that thing on the Internet
about your preview not doing so well.
- Hey, hang in there.
- Thanks. That's all bullshit anyway.
Went like gangbusters.
Over on the wall
and on the table are charts...
which indicate where
you've been designated to stand.
BEN: I was promised
that I'd stand between...
...the O and the W, where Stuart is.
But once word leaked out
about the screening in Cannes,
I was sent way over by the P.
Inches away from being
completely out of the business.
WOMAN: Actually, Ben, the P.
Yeah, you can go over near the P.
Right. The other way. Yeah. No, left.
My left, your right.
It's actually the other side.
If you go right on the other side. That's
good. A little farther. Little farther.
Right. If you'd switch with Todd.
Little farther.
Little farther. Little bit more.
You're near the P.
Great. Yeah, that's right.
On the other side. Yeah.
MAN:
This is Fiercely, 6M-6. Take 3.
MAN: This is Fiercely,
cue 1 M-1. Take 1.