12 Oz. Mouse s01e03 Episode Script

Rooster

1 No way.
Is she supposed to be that small? Fitz, are you done? It's really late.
I'm doner than you'll ever know.
You should come to bed.
In a second.
I've told you everything, and I'm threw.
I quatt yesterday.
I just did it in front of your face.
Uh, my head, my brain my my beer.
What's that noise? That that ticking.
That ticking is coming from that clock.
Oh, oh hey, Skillet.
Hello? Shark, I have decided that it's time we had an important business meeting.
I was kinda hoping um I thought you were dead.
I figured you were dumb enough to knew you thought that.
Well, I, I guess that, uh, that we, I knew that you knew that.
Okay.
But as everyone knows, I'm too rich to be dead.
Well, um The magnitude of my wealth goes beyond any wall of China.
Yeah.
Good for you.
And uh, I'm rich in desire to sleep.
So So what? Now is convenient for me.
Oh.
Look at you.
Here.
I AM here, more than you want.
You've been getting the signals, I trust.
Yeah, I got those.
Yes, you did got those.
Arigato.
How much does he know? How much does who know? You know.
God I hate that clock so much.
Oh.
Skillet.
Sorry Skillet.
I didn't I forgot it was you.
Is that some sort of package? Well, let me open it up.
This is a corndog.
This must be a divining corndog.
It must want mustard.
Some people, like to grow cotton.
Some people, slop them hogs.
Me, I do it different: I grow big, old fat corndogs.
Where's that mustard at? I could get lost in this field of corndogs for.
.
a long time.
But I would never die because I could eat corndogs for the pickin'.
Who are you? The name's Roostre.
R-double O-S-T-R-E.
Sometimes all in capitals, depending on if you're yelling at me or not.
So, you yelling? I ain't yelling.
Well, not yet.
See you found Footlong there.
Who's that? Footlong! He's my homing dog.
Got a sense for radar and quaznit.
So your corndog has radar? I knew it.
But what would he want with radar? What's anyone want with radar? Everything, boy! Boy, mouse, whatever.
You a mouse or a Or a what? Well hell, I don't know! I just thought you were a mouse or something.
I mean you look like a damn mouse.
The mouse.
Maybe.
You know, radar spelled backwards is radar.
Didja know that? You're thinking about it, ain't ya? Maybe.
What the hell? Get me missle command ASAP.
Where in the hell's that damn mutt think he's going to? Hold on, you mangy smellhound.
Here it comes.
Fire! Hey, you want a beer? Or do we need to get 12? You talking to me or this bird? And so uh, now when I sleep, I pull the covers over my ears because my sheets are banana spies.
Because people who don't see hear very well.
And that square guy, he's gonna get a nail up his ass next time he floors over here.
Guaranteed.
The no-eye square guy.
You know the one.
Listen Mouse.
Listen all around you and hear what they want you to hear.
Me, I'm out.
I'm far out.
I'm so (clears throat) I don't what'd I say? Square guy.
Like freakin' Pluto, man.
You know? And you're in the middle, which unfortunately, is in the way.
So let me get this straight.
You're out of beer? Or not out of beer? What'd I say again? What, what've I already I'm serious man; I'm fried.
And then, uh, then asprind was invented.
Common cure for things that asprind cures.
Leads to.
.
Rabies.
We all, uh, we all clear up to now? I just sold 30 million.
I bet none of you have 30 million.
Uh huh, like- I live in a bank.
Yeah, and then asprind was invented.
Common cure for things that asprind cures.
And that's when C.
J.
Muff left Q109.
And I said, "Dog muff! What you doin' leaving Q109, you dumbass dog? Well, that's um, that's all very interesting.
I wonder where Muff went.
Muff who? I'm the freakin' corn dog king.
Where'd Muff go? Come on, Mouse.
Come on where? You just don't get it, do you? You don't get it at all.
I got it.
I got a beer.
Man, I am so shot.
I Man, you're all kind of F'd up.
Hey baby, I decided that since I'm a woman, and you're a man, that you would sleep over with me in my expensive bedding.
You don't have any eyes.
Remember, I'm rich.
I don't care about your money.
Money doesn't mean anything here.
Well, dogs will bark, won't they? Woman power on.
Arrest this man.
Who knows who I am here? Does anybody know who I am? Cause I'm under arrest.
I think that I am very tired of the time.
Very tired of the time.
Very tired of the time.
Very timed of the time.
Very tired of the time gas.
You're what again? Eye-minent.
Fruitfully Eye-minent.
I don't know what that means, but yes.
Yes you are.
Skillet, Skillet, Skillet get up.
What're, What are these papers? These are some mysterious papers.
I wonder if Skillet's been turned into paper? Hey, you're back.
Your back.
Your front.
Got a job for ya.
I'm enthusiatic about all beer.
Especially this one.
You like corndogs, Butch.
Oup.
Don't say "yes.
" I hate corndogs.
It is Butch, isn't it?
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