90210 Episode Scripts

N/A - Meet the Parent

Hey, what's wrong? - My life, it's over.
- I'm sure you did fine on the SATs.
Jen is back.
She's back in L.
A? You know what? She's not our problem.
Everything is gonna be okay.
But it's not.
She bought the beach club.
She's taken my beach club away from me.
So we hang out somewhere else.
A man can only eat so many Yucatan chicken wraps.
No, but I love it there.
They come around and mist me while I'm tanning.
Jen's trying to ruin my life again.
Stay out of her way.
Don't engage.
Don't go anywhere near her.
I'll mist you.
You'll mist me? Sure.
I'll mist you.
Come on.
Hey.
Is that a portrait of me? It's abstract, Teddy.
I'm sorry about what happened with my dad.
I really am.
I was completely humiliated.
I should have told him about you.
But the thing is, my dad, he's tricky.
He's got a big personality and he can be kind of judgmental.
- And you don't think he'll like me? - No.
No, I do.
I mean, he will.
I really want him to like you.
And this is new to me, you know.
I haven't done this.
I haven't known a girl that mattered enough to me to introduce to my father and I want to do it right.
So come over and have dinner with me and my dad? And break bread with your kind of judgmental mega-movie star dad? Okay, she said, immediately regretting it.
Thank you, he says, getting ready to kiss her.
Yeah, three dimes.
No, I was thinking more like 18.
Come on up, have a look for yourself.
We'll settle on something fair.
I'm staying at the Pacific Waves Motor Hotel.
Every bit as luxurious as it sounds.
Yeah, two hours.
Okay.
So? So, my boy, I've got a broker in Redondo who thinks they may only be worth $15,000.
This is This is really gonna happen, huh? I mean, the tackle shop, you and me living together.
Thanks to you.
Dad, what do you say we celebrate? - Rent a boat or do some fishing.
- Yeah, sounds good.
Yeah.
Let me take care of my business and we'll hit the high seas.
Is it okay if I make a call? That's cool, Grizz.
Take five then we'll get busy.
All right, thanks.
- Hi.
- Hey.
Take five? That's, like, actual recording studio talk.
I am so excited.
Well, I'm excited you're excited, sweetie.
Speaking of exciting.
What would you think about maybe recording a duet with Javier? - It was the label's idea but I thought - Javier? As in Javier? Javier? Javier, Javier, Javier.
Okay, that's insane.
I am, like, his biggest fan ever.
I have his Christmas album.
I have his kids' album.
Anyway, slight snag.
Javier's about ready to go tour.
This needs to happen fast.
I can be anywhere, anytime.
Scheduling not the snag.
Check this out.
Right? I'm out to four different writers - praying for something better.
- I could write it.
I mean I'd like to try.
Why not? If you have something ready by Wednesday, we'll listen to it.
Okay.
Yeah, cool.
- Yeah, Pacific Waves.
- Oh, yeah, hi.
Finn Court, please.
He's not here.
- Excuse me? - Checked out about an hour ago.
Hi.
Hello? Excuse me? What are you doing? Why are you waving your tape measure in front of my house? My house.
We need to take a look at the gutters on the other side.
Sure.
Well, I pouted a little and Olivier bought it for me.
Well, for weekends.
A sort of country house.
You can't do this.
I already have.
I live here, Jen.
For 29 more days, as stipulated by California law.
But if the construction is gonna bother you, feel free to vacate sooner.
My God, you must have ESP.
I was about to call you.
- I have to talk to you.
- Yeah, I have to talk to you too.
Some messed up stuff just went down with my dad.
Well, did he evict you? Did he give you 29 days to get out? Jen just bought my house, Liam, the one I live in.
- What? - Now I'm gonna kill her.
No, no, you can't engage with her, Naomi.
She's like a rattlesnake.
You can't go poking her with a stick.
You find a new place to live.
Oh, really? Really? How? I don't know.
We'll find you something.
Just promise me that you'll stay away from her, okay? - She's toxic.
- Okay.
So I gave my dad these coins, right? And I'm gonna go eat some ice cream, calm myself down.
I'll call you back, babe.
What? Javier Luna? That's seriously amazing.
I know.
Double amazing.
Get this.
Laurel, my producer? - Yeah? - Letting me try to write the song.
- What? - I could be singer-songwriter.
Wow, I'm so proud of you.
Come here.
I've got to go to the Blaze.
We'll talk more.
I'll see you later? - Yeah.
See you.
- Bye.
Well, well, well, the plot thickens.
What is that supposed to mean? Why are you wiggling your eyebrows? He is my friend.
He's got a girlfriend.
Okay, don't kill me.
Do you wish he didn't? Okay, look, Navid will always be very special to me.
But he's with Lila now and he's happy, so I respect that.
And he totally deserves to be happy after everything I put him through, so Okay, just had to ask.
Okay, I got a question for you.
Eyebrow-wiggling-type question? Nope.
What's Teddy's dad like? I have to go over there tomorrow night, and I just wanna know what I'm in for.
You're meeting Spence? Why you say it like it that? Is he scary? He's just really intense.
He either loves people or hates people.
And when he hates people Oh, boy.
- Wait, are you nervous? - Now I am.
- Hey, what's up? - Not much.
Are you pissed at me? No, Dix, I'm not pissed at you, okay? I'm just not really into this whole getting-blown-off thing.
But I'm not.
I'm not blowing you off.
I just really appreciate direct communication, okay? So if you don't like me or you don't like blondes or you don't like the way I chew - or whatever - Stop.
You're getting the wrong idea.
All I wanna do is hang out with you, but you know I'm grounded.
So call me when you can, I guess.
- Wait.
- What? It doesn't mean that you can't come to my house, right? - I mean, am I allowed to? - I don't know.
But what I do know is my parents are going out tonight.
And I can't wait any longer to hang out with you.
- All right.
- All right? - Yeah, all right.
- All right.
No more wraps or mozzarella sticks.
I wanna class this place up, Tio.
I want more European flair.
Oh, how does a coq au vin chopped salad grab you? Good.
We have a good selection now of salads Hold that thought, Tio.
You know? To be continued.
- What do you want? - What, other than world peace? Oh, my God.
You can have any house in Beverly Hills and you had to have mine.
- Something doesn't smell right.
- Well I think that's probably Tio's aftershave.
You want something, Jen.
Yes, as a matter of fact, I do want something.
Look, while I was in France, Olivier and I, we fell back in love.
Well, it took time, but I knew I had to forgive him for his indiscretions and learn to trust him again.
And we are more in love than ever.
Waiter, barf bag.
That's why I can't allow you to tell him what happened last year.
He could never handle the thought of me with another man.
- He's very jealous.
- Oh, you don't want me to tell him - what a big tramp you were? - Exactly.
You know what? Do whatever you want.
I owe you a very big apology.
I have done some terrible things to you.
And I am really truly very sorry.
You can have the house.
I'll give it to you.
But what I would really like is another chance with you.
- Really? - You're the only sister I've got.
Please give me another chance.
And I would love for you to get to know Olivier.
Join us for dinner tomorrow night.
Please.
Guess who.
- Hillary Clinton? - Close.
- Tila Tequila? - Closer.
- Lila, is that you? - Hi.
Hey.
All right, so I have a story idea.
Everyone's talking about Adrianna and Javier.
We should do a piece.
Well, I thought you were sensitive about the Ade thing.
I was.
I mean, my chest basically turned to concrete at the mention of her name.
I don't know.
Maybe it's because we've been hanging out so much or maybe it's because we've gotten closer.
But recently, no concrete.
- That's cool.
- That is cool.
Hey.
Hey, sorry.
I tried knocking but Hey, Liam? Hello? I'm not doing this Matthews project by myself.
I barely know who Vivaldi is, I mean Are you okay? - Where did you get the boat? - I built it.
You built a boat? That's what I do when I wanna blow off some steam, okay? Okay.
So, what got you all steamed up? You can talk to me.
I mean, come on.
You were there when I found out my parents were all messed up, so you can definitely trust me.
My dad meant a lot to me when I was a kid.
And we were, like, really close and we went sailing, you know.
Sailing was our thing.
Anyway, he hasn't been around for a while and just recently, out of the blue, he showed up.
And like an idiot, I got all excited thinking he was gonna stay.
But as soon as he got what he wanted, he took off.
And Just Whatever, so Hey, I haven't really told anybody about my dad, so if you What about Naomi? Yeah.
Well, no.
Well, you should tell her.
I mean, she is your girlfriend.
Yeah.
Jack neat and let me have one of those local beers you're always touting.
- Yeah, just a ginger ale for me.
- You got it.
I'm getting a little old for vomiting and hangovers, don't you think? No.
You're never too old for vomiting and hangovers.
Says you.
- Thank you.
- It's a work thing.
Cross your fingers they're not dragging me back to the studio.
Yeah? Ryan? Jen.
- Hi.
- Hello, darling.
Can I say two words to you? Signature umbrellas.
- That's what this place needs.
- That's a good idea.
This is Ryan Matthews, Naomi's teacher.
Ryan, this is Olivier, my husband.
An educator.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
- Drinks on the house.
- Oh, that's okay It's no skin off my face.
We own the beach club.
Wow, now that's a great thing to own.
- It's not the Dodgers, but - Darling, we should get to our table.
Ryan, it was lovely to see you.
- Indeed it was.
Great meeting you.
- Pleasure was mine.
Can I get a little whiskey in the ginger ale? - And make it a double.
- Sure.
Oh, hey, watch the carbon footprint.
I can't write.
I can't.
I have lost my ability to string words together.
This was it.
This is my big chance.
I'm totally blowing it.
You've written songs before.
Not like this.
I don't know what's happening.
Everything I write is terrible.
The more I write the terribler it gets.
Terribler.
Listen to me.
I totally can't even talk.
No.
Let me see.
You're probably just being hard on yourself.
Oh, my God, I'm ruined.
No, you're not, just You gotta get out of your head.
How do I do that? By banging it against the wall? - I already tried that.
- I'll figure something out.
I'm sorry, it was supposed to be just us but my dad invited a few friends.
My half sister Kate might be here.
You'd like Kate.
She's really nice.
Like, obsessed with horses, but really nice.
- Yeah? - Arthur, if you keep asking questions about this contract, I'm gonna throw you on the grill.
Fine.
But if the deal doesn't close, don't call me crying.
- I'll call you screaming.
- Whatever.
- Yeah, well - Hey, Dad, you Listen, don't bill me for this hour either, Arthur.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Dad, this is Silver from the match.
Hi, Silver.
What an unusual name.
- Oh, actually, it's - I hope you're hungry.
Take a look at this piece of meat.
Is this not gorgeous? Come on, Peter Luger.
Actually, Silver's a vegetarian.
Does she eat chicken? - No, not so much.
- No? Well, let's see.
Maybe I've got a veggie burger with your name on it.
Silver.
Put it right there.
- That's perfect.
- Teddy says you don't play tennis.
Oh, no, sadly I don't.
- But l - Silver's really into the Blaze.
What is that? Is that a junior arsonist club? No, it's like a magazine.
I mean, it's like a It's like a newspaper.
- But actually, it's more of - Silver's a journalist.
Yeah? Well, in my field, I've met hundreds of journalists and I never liked one of them.
Dr.
Fun to the rescue.
I don't see how playing skee ball is gonna get the song written.
Trust me.
If you're not inspired and out of your head in one hour, I will release you from my clutches.
Deal? - Deal.
- All right.
Dr.
Fun? You see that homeless man in the white shirt? - Yeah.
- I think that's Mr.
Matthews.
- No.
- Yeah.
Mr.
Matthews? Oh, hey.
Oh, I got into a little tussle with this chili dog and I have to admit defeat.
Because just Look at it.
It's a worthy adversary.
- Hey, Mr.
Matthews, you cool? - Yeah.
Why, don't I look cool? Hanging on the trash can? Are you sure you're okay, Mr.
Matthews? Guys, please, this Mr.
Matthews, it's so formal.
You know.
We're outside of school, try something like Mr.
Ryan Matthews.
Well, I'm gonna hit the road.
Papers to grade.
You're both getting A's.
- Oh, wait, you calling a taxi? - Taxi.
Taxi Driver.
Great movie.
- You talking to me? - What? - You talking to me? - No.
No, from the thing.
- The movie.
- Right.
- You having an okay time? - Yeah.
Sorry I'm so tongue-tied.
I feel like I'm making a horrible first impression.
- You're doing great.
- Hey, Teddy.
- Oh, hey.
- Sorry, I'm late.
Hey, you're the horse lover.
It's Kate, right? Teddy's sister? Actually, Heidi here is my dad's girlfriend.
Yeah, we met on set.
That's right.
And in a very good movie too.
Into Arabia.
- Did you ever see that film, Silver? - Yes, I did.
- Great film, huh? - Great film.
- Great film.
- Great film.
- Great.
We loved it.
- Yeah.
- You didn't like it? - No.
No, no, it I mean, it's kind of just a diff Actually, no, I didn't like it.
It employed a bunch of played-out, fear-mongering stereotypes of Arab people.
The female characters, they were offensively sexist and idiotic and I mean, frankly, it was a waste of your talent.
Well, to tell you the truth, I don't think you're wrong.
And that woman, that astrophysicist character What's she doing in Lebanon? I don't remember.
Rocking a gold lamé bikini, as I recall.
- Exactly.
That's exactly right.
- It's true.
Funny girl.
Get me off this ride before I get all Mr.
Ryan Matthews on that trash can.
Yeah, funnel cake wasn't the wisest move.
- We should go.
- No.
No, this was really nice of you, but honestly, it's pointless.
I'm so stupid for thinking I could actually write a real song.
No, hey, would you just cut it out? I won't listen to you beat yourself up.
I have three minutes.
And I say we hit the bumper cars.
No, no bumper cars, okay? - Just let me go, please.
- No.
- What? Why? - Because, Ade, you can do this.
I know you can.
I believe in you.
I see you like this, all depressed and down on yourself, it hurts.
It's like the worst feeling in the world.
Seeing you happy, that means everything to me.
Navid.
- I gotta take this.
- Yeah.
Lila, hey.
No, I had a lot of work at the Blaze.
I'm just hanging out at the pier.
Okay, I'll meet you at the beach club.
- Sorry about that.
- It's fine.
- So where were we? - Leaving.
Your plan actually worked, Dr.
Fun.
I'm inspired.
I really wanna go home and write.
Let's hit the road.
All right.
Oh, wait, shall we get some dessert? I don't know.
Are you trying to prolong dinner? Sadly, I do not see your sister coming, Jennifer.
- I mean - No, no, no, she'll be here.
She's just late.
Trust me.
I know my sister, and I know she'll come.
Well, I could try the mango sorbet.
Okay.
- Oh, here she is.
- You must be Naomi.
- I'm Olivier, your brother-in-law.
- Oh, please don't kiss me.
And sit back down.
I'm not gonna be here that long.
I think there are a few things you deserve to know about my sister.
I'm sure Jen probably told you she spent last year pining for you.
The truth is she was pretty much slutting it up with any semi-rich guy - who'd look halfway in her direction.
- Naomi? - What? - Oh, yeah.
And you might find this interesting.
She also slept with my boyfriend.
He was, what, 16 at the time? This Is this true? Lt No, of course it's not true.
You disgust me.
- No, Olivier.
- No.
Au revoir, as they say in French.
So I'm gonna head back home and pack.
Bye.
- Ladies first.
- Thank you.
Dixon, this is unreal.
Well And I thought I went a little overboard but I just hope you're not wearing anything flammable.
No way.
Are these Koji short rib tacos? Yeah, they are.
I mean, I know they're your favorite.
I've been chasing the truck all day on Twitter.
I made it to Abbot Kinney and back.
I had to go to a different taco truck for the Cokes.
And you got Mexican Cokes.
Of course.
Dixon, you Dude, what was that? My parents.
Mom? Dad? Hey, buddy, Mom forgot her wallet.
What would you like me to say, huh? That mom forgot the paper with the marriage counselor's address on it? No, I just feel like you think everything is my fault.
- Like this whole thing is my fault.
- You know, l You know what? Save it for Dr.
Silva.
What's going on in here? You know, I just I forgot my wallet.
- What is going on? - Nothing.
- Why? - You gotta be kidding me, right? Nothing? Really? I'm not an idiot, you guys.
- Dixon? - Annie? - I'll be right back.
- Dixon? I have to talk to you right now.
- Right now isn't the greatest time.
- Annie.
Annie, talk to us.
Talk to you? Fine.
I know that you two have been fighting.
And I know it's because Mom kissed some guy.
- Annie - What? Look.
Mom and I have been having some problems, that's true.
We didn't want to say anything to you guys until we understood what was going on ourselves.
We've been seeing a counselor.
A marriage counselor? Yes.
We don't have dinner plans tonight.
We have a session.
Wait, so Mom kissed who? That's not important, and it's not all Mom's fault.
The problems are mutual.
But we don't want you two to worry about it.
Okay, so then there's nothing to worry about.
You know you promised that everything was gonna be okay.
Oh, my God.
Look, we love you guys and we're doing the best that we can.
We need to get to our appointment.
Guys, this is us trying.
We'll talk about it later, okay? I feel like I'm gonna throw up.
I mean, I'm confused.
What are we supposed to feel about this now? What are we gonna do? Can we talk about this later? What? Fine.
Whatever.
Hey.
Sorry about that.
My family's a little crazy, I guess.
You okay? Yeah, yeah.
I'm sorry about tha I don't even know what that was.
Okay, Dixon, just stop apologizing.
- I mean, that was - Messed up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Liam.
To the victor go the spoils.
- Can I pour you a glass? - No, I'm good.
What's going on? The dragon is slain.
Jen? I thought you said you were gonna stay away from her.
I know.
But Jen is a rattlesnake.
You said so yourself.
And you don't let a rattlesnake slither around screwing up your life.
You chop off its ugly head.
You should have seen her face when I told Olivier about how she's been whoring around town.
It looked like a pen exploded onto her Kelly bag.
That's good.
Naomi, something's been going on with me and l Oh, my God.
What if Olivier's so pissed at her that he locks her out and she has to stay in a cabana at the beach club or something.
Can you imagine? Hey.
How was the pier? It was okay.
I went with Ade.
Navid, it's totally cool.
Lila, there's something that I have to tell you.
I think you are so amazing.
You're brilliant and so much fun.
Those sound like bad compliments.
I realized tonight that I still feel something for Ade.
I don't even know what it means or what I'm even gonna do about it.
But I know it's not fair to you and I think we should break up.
Wow, okay.
I really am sorry, Lila.
Annie, what's up? I'm sorry.
I don't know why I'm here.
But I'm here and I had a really rough night.
And I needed to blow off some steam.
- Okay.
- Can I help? Do the stern.
Actually, the other end.
It's just ironic.
All these years, l I've been just trying to relax, you know? Just trying to believe that life can be stable.
But just because my family was always falling apart when I was little doesn't mean it's gonna fall apart now, right? Then when I finally relax, it falls apart.
Damn, I must have been rambling.
It's been like an hour.
I feel like I owe you a hundred bucks or something.
Give me a break, Dixon.
You can't get good therapy for hundred bucks.
But, Dixon, you have nothing to apologize for.
I'm actually really honestly flattered that you feel like you can talk to me.
Well, you're just easy to talk to.
And look, I know you told me not to apologize, but this has got to be our worst date yet.
I don't think so.
I mean, dates are for getting to know each other, right? And I am getting to know you.
And I'm liking what I'm knowing.
- Hey, Dad.
- Hey.
Silver's a charming girl.
And she rides a motorcycle.
How cool is that? Well, a Vespa, but, yeah, she is cool.
I'm glad you think she's cool.
You know you're my favorite, don't you? I'm not supposed to say that, but it's true.
Thanks, Dad.
I'm so proud of you.
I know you can take this tennis all the way if you just started taking it a little more seriously.
Dad, I'm at practice like ten times a week.
Right.
And now you're at a point where you have to make a decision.
You're gonna go pro or you're gonna give out lessons at The Beach Club? I wanna be Federer.
You know that.
That's all I want.
Then it's settled.
No more distractions.
No more girlfriends.
Break up with her, Teddy.
- Hey, superstar.
- Hey.
What do you say to a matinee before your match tonight? A movie? You're kidding, right? - Yes.
- Yeah, and I'll just bring a tub of popcorn to my match.
Look, I don't just show up, Silver.
I've gotta warm up, I've gotta talk to my coach, I've gotta mentally prepare.
I have to focus.
Okay.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize how involved Look, I've gotta get to class.
Rise and shine, pet.
What are you doing here? Oh, I'm just here to thank you for making me 10 million euro richer.
That's approximately 16 million U.
S.
Croissant? What are you talking about? Last night, your performance was truly magnificent.
And absolutely predictable.
Olivier was so distraught, he went running straight into the, shall we say arms, of another woman.
Which is exactly what he's done every other time he's gotten jealous in the past.
You wanted him to cheat on you.
When we got back together, we added a fidelity clause to our prenup.
A few choice snaps from my PI and voila.
I'm 16 mil richer.
- You're disturbed.
- Now, now.
Let's not get nasty.
You know, you really should be a little nicer to me now - that I'll be handling your finances.
- What? Well, I felt obliged to tell daddy how you've been blowing through your trust fund.
The poor guy, he started panicking.
Luckily, I offered to help.
This is not happening.
This is a nightmare.
Naomi, aren't you hungry? You beat him in straight sets.
I told you all you gotta do is focus.
- Yup.
- Give me this thing.
- Put it in the trophy room.
- Focus.
Wimbledon, here we come.
- Hey, Silver.
- Hey.
- Let me get this for you.
- Thanks.
I was actually just on my way over to your place.
I apologize.
It was thoughtless No, no.
I'm the one who should apologize to you.
I was stressed.
I shouldn't have taken it out on you.
Sorry.
So we're even? - Even.
- How was your match? - I won in straight sets.
- That's good.
I'm not exactly a tennis buff but winning is winning, right? Yeah.
Except no.
I thought winning today would make me happy.
But when I won and I didn't have you, I realized it doesn't mean anything if you're not there.
Because - Because - Because we're falling in love? Because I am in love.
Sparks fly like electric shock Pushing through my veins When we touch Like I never wanna stop - Do you feel that way? - Her eyes When they meet with mine Is she aware? That I wanna hold her tight Because there's something there - It's gone - It's passed We both know It's never coming back - That's done, that's over - That's over Does he still love me? Do I still love her? One more time Can we give it just one more try? To love and be together Like the first time - No love, can't love, no love - No love, can't love, no love You can't love No back it up Not this time - Can we love to love, can we love? - Can we love to love, can we love? True love Can't love you like the first time Please love me like the first First time - She killed it.
- That was hot.
You killed it, sweetie.
- Let's take five.
- Thank you.
Damn, you wrote this song in two days? This single is gonna be huge.
It's got a great hook.
Did you write it for your boyfriend? No, I don't have a boyfriend.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- I'm here to see Adrianna.
- Oh, she's inside.
Cute flowers.
A beautiful girl like you doesn't have a boyfriend? No, I don't.
There's no one, no special guy.
No one.
I'm glad.