Clarence US (2014) s01e48 Episode Script
The Break Up
1 I don't care what you say! I'm gonna do what I want all day! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! Jeff: Okay, now move Iron Hank a little to the left.
A little bit more.
Wait! That's too much.
Just move him back to where he was before.
- Ugh, okay.
- Hmm.
Mecha-jaws' arm could be a little straighter.
Rarr, I'm gonna stop at nothing to make sure my children survive! Ooh, an offering.
Ptew! Hey, you got a little hat.
You have my deepest gratitude, Clarence.
Sumo, stop! You're moving it too much.
The movements have to be slight and precise so that we can capture each frame exactly.
Uh-huh.
Hey, what if we smash these eggs I found? Oh, my gosh! No! How are we going to explain all that egg appearing over one frame? I don't know.
What about an egg explosion? - Ooh, an eggsplosion! - And how do you propose we pull an eggsplosion in just one frame? Okay, then we can do scenes with eggs and then do a different cut without eggs.
We have to be able to capture it, Sumo.
Oh, yeah? Capture this.
That's it! Do you have any idea how long - I spent setting up that shot? - Oh, look, here comes King Jeff.
Better do what he says because he's the king.
Oh, yeah? Well, obey this! Yeah, you like that? Hey, everybody stop fighting.
So says I, Mr.
Mud Man.
Rarr.
- You broke all my eggs! - You were breaking them anyway! This has gone too far.
You always ruin everything I try to do.
Well at least I'm not a complete buzzkill.
I have fun.
And by the way, his name's not Mecha-jaws.
It's Steve! Come along, Steve.
Jeff: Fine, consider this friendship terminated.
Sumo: Oh, good.
What a relief.
Jeff: I'm gonna have tons of fun on my own, and you're not invited.
Taquito, taquito and one burrito, burrito, burrito and one taquito Hey, want to hang out? Sumo, I I thought you left because you were mad at Jeff.
That guy's a joke.
Let's not talk about him.
What? But Jeff's great.
You know, he's such a Um, he's a - Want to smash these eggs? - Ooh, yes.
Incoming! Bye, Sumo.
Oh, did you forget something, Su Hello, Clarence, you want to watch a movie? Oh.
Sure.
I actually thought that you were Sumo just now 'cause Can we not talk about Sumo, please? I just want to have a good time watching a movie with my friend.
- But Sumo is our friend.
- I brought "Lil' Grandpa.
" Go back and play that part again.
Oh, look here.
This is what I was talking about earlier.
In this shot, the extra in the red jacket is sitting, and in the very next scene, he's standing way over on the other side of the room.
Yeah.
It looks like he's just bouncing around in there.
Good luck following the film's plot with inconsistencies like this staring you in the face.
Yeah.
Bye, Jeff.
See you later.
I found more eggs! - What?! - I found more eggs! Okay! Let me just put on my shoes.
Say what? Oh, yeah.
- Okay, you ready? - Yeah, yeah, let's do it.
Human yo-yo! Later, Sumo.
Can I interest you in a little magic? - Voilã ! - Whoa.
I know you really like arithmetic but now we're just divided you're never adding any more, you just take away used to shut out the funk with you and now I'm less excited because my energy is focusing two ways I'll slip between you like the peel of a banana I'm slippin', slippin' away ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh talking to you till you can tell me any bother why don't you throw me away? ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Hey, Jeff, wouldn't it be more fun - if Sumo played with us, too? - Absolutely not.
Nah, Jeff's a wuss.
He's just too wild.
At least I know how to have fun.
And he's always breaking my belongings.
I bet he's never even smashed anything.
- He doesn't respect labels.
- He's crazy.
You know what his idea of a great time is? Together: He just makes me so mad.
I got to help these guys be friends again.
Man: And to think, we wouldn't have been able to reconcile our differences if a special little someone hadn't tricked us into coming to this romantic dinner.
But where's grandpa? A romantic dinner that's perfect.
Ooh, hot, hot, hot, hot.
Now all that's left is for Jeff and Sumo to get here.
They'll be all like, "oh, what?" This is a nice, fancy spaghetti dinner.
Yeah, it sure is really nice to see you again.
Yeah, you too.
So nice to be reminded of how we're best friends.
Yeah, isn't it so great that Clarence tricked us into coming here for such a nice, refreshing dinner? Yeah, I just feel so good right now.
Maybe we should hug.
- Oh, you feel nice.
- You too.
- Mmm.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Jeff: What the - What the heck are you doing here? Clarence invited me to his fancy spaghetti dinner.
Why would he invite both of us to a one-on-one dinner? He's trying to trick us into being in the same place so that we'll become friends again.
He's obviously been watching too much "Lil' Grandpa.
" - Did he really think that would work? - I know.
So manipulative.
- Well, I guess he learned from the best.
- What's that supposed to mean? I think you know what it means, King Jeff.
Okay, don't you have a box of bricks to bust your head on somewhere? I got stood up.
What happened, Jeff? How come you didn't come to our fancy sp - Are you okay? - Yes, I'm fine.
What are you doing? - Ugh, don't mention that name.
- What? I don't want to talk about Sumo, okay? I'm all right.
See? Anyway, Sumo left a few of his belongings here.
I've collected them for you to return to him.
- What? - Leave this place! Go! Go so I may wash my hands of Sumo's memory for good.
Well, I guess I'll just take this to Sumo.
Don't mention that name! Sumo: Yes, I'll never forget those summers with my two buddies.
We were inseparable.
Why, I remember one time down by the watering hole Sumo? Hey.
Uh, hey, man, what's that? Oh, Jeff told me to give you this box of all your stuff.
Oh, you saw Jeff? Did he ask about me? I mean, he say anything about me? - I mean, what's up? - Okay, enough's enough.
You guys should just make friends again.
- You seem all sad.
- What? Sad? I'm I'm You're sad.
I don't need Jeff anymore.
- Emilio's my new friend, right, Emilio? - It's too heavy.
Hey, want to play human yo-yo? - I found a new big hill.
- Yeah! - Okay, ready? - Yeah.
Good and tight.
Let's do this! I'm doing this for you, Sumo.
What? Hey! What are you doing? Hey! - What the heck is this, man? - This is for your own good.
Your face I see it everywhere - Oof.
- Ow.
Sumo? I thought I told you I didn't want to see you ever again.
This maniac dragged me over here! Enough, already.
You two just need to Stop, Clarence.
Sumo and I have made our choice.
Yeah, it just doesn't work plain and simple.
And you have to respect that, Clarence.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Think fast! Now we're friends again.
- Clarence! - Clarence! No, no handcuffs! I can't do it! Ugh, what's so funny? Oh, my.
What's going on over there? I'm sorry I acted like a jerk.
Yeah, I guess I was kind of mean sometimes.
Is that supposed to be me? Oh, uh yeah.
- Cool! Let's go smash them.
- Okay.
Wait.
What about Clarence? Clarence: Nah, you guys just go along.
Um, I'm just gonna hang out here and I-I'll see you later.
- Uh, okay, see you.
- Ooh, is that a whole carton? Oh, yeah, and there's more upstairs.
Yes!
A little bit more.
Wait! That's too much.
Just move him back to where he was before.
- Ugh, okay.
- Hmm.
Mecha-jaws' arm could be a little straighter.
Rarr, I'm gonna stop at nothing to make sure my children survive! Ooh, an offering.
Ptew! Hey, you got a little hat.
You have my deepest gratitude, Clarence.
Sumo, stop! You're moving it too much.
The movements have to be slight and precise so that we can capture each frame exactly.
Uh-huh.
Hey, what if we smash these eggs I found? Oh, my gosh! No! How are we going to explain all that egg appearing over one frame? I don't know.
What about an egg explosion? - Ooh, an eggsplosion! - And how do you propose we pull an eggsplosion in just one frame? Okay, then we can do scenes with eggs and then do a different cut without eggs.
We have to be able to capture it, Sumo.
Oh, yeah? Capture this.
That's it! Do you have any idea how long - I spent setting up that shot? - Oh, look, here comes King Jeff.
Better do what he says because he's the king.
Oh, yeah? Well, obey this! Yeah, you like that? Hey, everybody stop fighting.
So says I, Mr.
Mud Man.
Rarr.
- You broke all my eggs! - You were breaking them anyway! This has gone too far.
You always ruin everything I try to do.
Well at least I'm not a complete buzzkill.
I have fun.
And by the way, his name's not Mecha-jaws.
It's Steve! Come along, Steve.
Jeff: Fine, consider this friendship terminated.
Sumo: Oh, good.
What a relief.
Jeff: I'm gonna have tons of fun on my own, and you're not invited.
Taquito, taquito and one burrito, burrito, burrito and one taquito Hey, want to hang out? Sumo, I I thought you left because you were mad at Jeff.
That guy's a joke.
Let's not talk about him.
What? But Jeff's great.
You know, he's such a Um, he's a - Want to smash these eggs? - Ooh, yes.
Incoming! Bye, Sumo.
Oh, did you forget something, Su Hello, Clarence, you want to watch a movie? Oh.
Sure.
I actually thought that you were Sumo just now 'cause Can we not talk about Sumo, please? I just want to have a good time watching a movie with my friend.
- But Sumo is our friend.
- I brought "Lil' Grandpa.
" Go back and play that part again.
Oh, look here.
This is what I was talking about earlier.
In this shot, the extra in the red jacket is sitting, and in the very next scene, he's standing way over on the other side of the room.
Yeah.
It looks like he's just bouncing around in there.
Good luck following the film's plot with inconsistencies like this staring you in the face.
Yeah.
Bye, Jeff.
See you later.
I found more eggs! - What?! - I found more eggs! Okay! Let me just put on my shoes.
Say what? Oh, yeah.
- Okay, you ready? - Yeah, yeah, let's do it.
Human yo-yo! Later, Sumo.
Can I interest you in a little magic? - Voilã ! - Whoa.
I know you really like arithmetic but now we're just divided you're never adding any more, you just take away used to shut out the funk with you and now I'm less excited because my energy is focusing two ways I'll slip between you like the peel of a banana I'm slippin', slippin' away ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh talking to you till you can tell me any bother why don't you throw me away? ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Hey, Jeff, wouldn't it be more fun - if Sumo played with us, too? - Absolutely not.
Nah, Jeff's a wuss.
He's just too wild.
At least I know how to have fun.
And he's always breaking my belongings.
I bet he's never even smashed anything.
- He doesn't respect labels.
- He's crazy.
You know what his idea of a great time is? Together: He just makes me so mad.
I got to help these guys be friends again.
Man: And to think, we wouldn't have been able to reconcile our differences if a special little someone hadn't tricked us into coming to this romantic dinner.
But where's grandpa? A romantic dinner that's perfect.
Ooh, hot, hot, hot, hot.
Now all that's left is for Jeff and Sumo to get here.
They'll be all like, "oh, what?" This is a nice, fancy spaghetti dinner.
Yeah, it sure is really nice to see you again.
Yeah, you too.
So nice to be reminded of how we're best friends.
Yeah, isn't it so great that Clarence tricked us into coming here for such a nice, refreshing dinner? Yeah, I just feel so good right now.
Maybe we should hug.
- Oh, you feel nice.
- You too.
- Mmm.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Jeff: What the - What the heck are you doing here? Clarence invited me to his fancy spaghetti dinner.
Why would he invite both of us to a one-on-one dinner? He's trying to trick us into being in the same place so that we'll become friends again.
He's obviously been watching too much "Lil' Grandpa.
" - Did he really think that would work? - I know.
So manipulative.
- Well, I guess he learned from the best.
- What's that supposed to mean? I think you know what it means, King Jeff.
Okay, don't you have a box of bricks to bust your head on somewhere? I got stood up.
What happened, Jeff? How come you didn't come to our fancy sp - Are you okay? - Yes, I'm fine.
What are you doing? - Ugh, don't mention that name.
- What? I don't want to talk about Sumo, okay? I'm all right.
See? Anyway, Sumo left a few of his belongings here.
I've collected them for you to return to him.
- What? - Leave this place! Go! Go so I may wash my hands of Sumo's memory for good.
Well, I guess I'll just take this to Sumo.
Don't mention that name! Sumo: Yes, I'll never forget those summers with my two buddies.
We were inseparable.
Why, I remember one time down by the watering hole Sumo? Hey.
Uh, hey, man, what's that? Oh, Jeff told me to give you this box of all your stuff.
Oh, you saw Jeff? Did he ask about me? I mean, he say anything about me? - I mean, what's up? - Okay, enough's enough.
You guys should just make friends again.
- You seem all sad.
- What? Sad? I'm I'm You're sad.
I don't need Jeff anymore.
- Emilio's my new friend, right, Emilio? - It's too heavy.
Hey, want to play human yo-yo? - I found a new big hill.
- Yeah! - Okay, ready? - Yeah.
Good and tight.
Let's do this! I'm doing this for you, Sumo.
What? Hey! What are you doing? Hey! - What the heck is this, man? - This is for your own good.
Your face I see it everywhere - Oof.
- Ow.
Sumo? I thought I told you I didn't want to see you ever again.
This maniac dragged me over here! Enough, already.
You two just need to Stop, Clarence.
Sumo and I have made our choice.
Yeah, it just doesn't work plain and simple.
And you have to respect that, Clarence.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Think fast! Now we're friends again.
- Clarence! - Clarence! No, no handcuffs! I can't do it! Ugh, what's so funny? Oh, my.
What's going on over there? I'm sorry I acted like a jerk.
Yeah, I guess I was kind of mean sometimes.
Is that supposed to be me? Oh, uh yeah.
- Cool! Let's go smash them.
- Okay.
Wait.
What about Clarence? Clarence: Nah, you guys just go along.
Um, I'm just gonna hang out here and I-I'll see you later.
- Uh, okay, see you.
- Ooh, is that a whole carton? Oh, yeah, and there's more upstairs.
Yes!