Fishing Impossible Episode Scripts

N/A - Episode 3

1 THE BLOWFISH: This is Fishing Impossible.
We're three fishy fanatics on an epic adventure.
We're heading to some of the world's most extreme destinations to catch the most extraordinary fish, but the creatures we're after don't make it easy, so we'll need to go to incredible lengths to catch the uncatchable.
This is Jay.
He's obsessed with free diving and spear fishing, and he's as tough as a nut.
'Course I am, I'm the Cornish man.
This is Charlie, the level-headed one.
Level-headed, that is, until he gets a big bite (LAUGHS) Lashing down, and we're attached to something absolutely ginormous.
(EXCLAIMS) and I'm The Blowfish, a marine biologist.
This is a vermilion rock cod.
I like to catch fish with my bare hands.
Blimey, he's huge.
Look at that.
As a marine biologist and experienced diver, I've spent my life getting up close and personal with the sea's most extraordinary animals but there's one creature I've been obsessed with since I was a child, the mighty Humboldt squid.
It's got a fearsome reputation as one of the true monsters of the deep, with the power to slice through flesh and kill divers.
It's my dream to track one down in its native habitat.
To get up close to one, I need to take the boys all the way to Peru one of the biggest jumbo squid exporters in the world, where my mission will be to dive down in the dead of night while the squid are hunting near the surface and catch one with my bare hands.
Along the way, the boys will be learning to fish with some of the toughest and fittest fishermen on the planet Hang on! Hang on! I've got a bite! Yeah! (SCREAMS) and Charlie tries a bit of coastal rock-climbing.
Any mistake around here, you're getting crushed, mate.
A serious, serious swell coming in, right? Hold on.
Whoa! We're on the northern coast of Peru, and aiming to meet some local fishermen who've just returned from a night trip.
I'm going to get my very first glimpse of a Humboldt squid.
Wow, look at that! I can hardly lift that.
It's got to be about 30-40 kilos, I reckon.
That is a monster! (GRUNTS) I didn't expect it to be that big.
This thing's massive, and these guys are covered in what look like tiny little dots, and those dots are colour-changing cells called chromatophores, and they'll flash colours to talk to other squid.
Fish, you do realise that you're gonna be swimming with these? Yeah, but it probably won't all be that bad, I mean Mate, with eyes like that, it's gonna see you coming.
Peru's fishermen haul in over 400,000 tonnes of squid a year.
Tonight's catch gives Jay and Charlie the perfect opportunity to get the measure of what I'll be dealing with on my dive.
Put your waders on and hush your lips up.
(INDISTINCT) Oh, Charlie's going in.
Yeah! (COUGHS) (LAUGHS) (GRUNTS) Oh, my God! Oh, my God, man.
We now know that Humboldt squid are definitely here in Peru, but what we really need to know is how to catch them.
How do you get the squid to come to the boat? (SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE) He has spotlights.
Yeah, look, he's got big lights on his boat there.
It's obviously working, isn't it? Cos look how many squid he's got.
What kind of method are you using to catch the squid? (SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE) To catch these squid, you need a serious hook to put your bait on.
Whoa, man.
That's not fishing.
Look at that, that's like a depth charge.
Wow.
Look at that.
These fishermen rely on bringing up squid in huge numbers, which is why they use such ferocious lures, but I don't want to harm a squid.
I want to catch one underwater with my bare hands and release it back into the sea.
Who knows what the locals will make of my idea? The plan here is that I'm gonna go diving at night with Humboldt squid.
Does that sound like a good idea? (LAUGHS) He's smiling, so yeah.
He's laughing at you! What's that? 'Crazy?' It's dangerous.
What do you think is the worst thing that could possibly happen to Fish? (SPEAKING OWN LANGUAGE) That's Oh.
But right now, the danger is the least of my worries.
It turns out the squid are way further off shore than I expected.
That's a long That's a long ol' haul.
Peru is in the middle of an El Nino year.
This produces a change in the climate that makes the sea warmer close to shore.
Warmer waters mean less nutrients, and the squid have been pushed miles out to sea in search of food, and to make matters worse, El Nino also creates huge, unpredictable storms.
Nothing about this mission is gonna be easy.
If we wanna catch big squid, we'll have to go looking for them.
It's 60 miles off the coast, you know.
We could hit rough weather, big swells, you know.
The elements are against us on this one, I feel.
Morning in Peru, and the enormity of our challenge is starting to sink in.
Now we're actually here on the Pacific Coast, and El Nino is here with us, my idea to dive with the squid is looking seriously difficult.
We're doing a night dive.
Yeah.
So that makes everything 10 or 15 times harder immediately, OK? Safety paramount.
There's no point going down if you don't come back up.
Exactly.
End of.
I'm going to be diving while wearing a chainmail suit to protect me from the squid, but if I get into trouble, I could sink without a trace, so I'll need one of the guys to hold a rope and pull me in if things get hairy.
So I'm setting them a test of strength to decide who holds the rope.
They'll have to use all their muscle to paddle these traditional reed rafts past the surf to the best fishing spots, just like the locals.
So, here we are then, boys.
Yeah.
If they make it over those monster waves, they'll start hand-lining for mackerel and bonito.
The biggest catch wins Bro.
Yo.
How far are we going? (SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE) Where the boats are? (ALL LAUGH) How do we get through the waves? Right.
Right.
With this little paddle? It's very small, huh? Yeah, very small.
and the Peruvian weather is doing the boys no favours.
The surf is huge.
This isn't just for my enjoyment of watching you two guys suffer.
I need to know that you guys can do the job when we're on the boat, OK? So heads on.
I want your best effort.
Mate, my head's on.
My head's on as well.
If I look this way, I feel all right.
It's when I turn around (ALL LAUGH) Oh, get on it.
Get on your board! Go on, Charlie, there you go! (LAUGHS) Ah! (LAUGHS) I can't balance.
Go on, lads, have it! Yeah, arriba, arriba! I'm arriba-ing, man! Whoa! Here we go! Charlie runs ultra-marathons, Jay's an ex-Marine, but paddling against the surf is next to impossible, even for these boys.
(EXCLAIMS) Yeah, boy! It's hard, man.
There's still a lot of breakers to get through.
Ah! Jay's really grafting for it.
There's a big wave, though.
Oh! Oh, he's gone! He's gone.
As they get further out, the waves are getting bigger and bigger.
There's a chance neither of them will make it but just when it looks like it's all over, the boys have blagged themselves a lift.
Is that cheating, or is that ingenuity? (LAUGHS) OK, boys, Royal Marines, let's go catch some fish! Oh! (EXCLAIMS) Gracias.
(SCREAMS) Are you even fishing yet? No, of course I'm not! All I'm doing is falling in! Can't even stay Just stand here like that.
That's it, I'll use yours as a bit of support, moral and physical.
Man, look at the birds right next to me.
I was hoping the boys would bring back a haul of bonito, but they're getting nowhere fast.
With the swell rising, they decide to call it a day.
Hang on, hang on, I've got a break.
Yeah! So no fish and no winner, but Jay looked much safer out there, so I've decided he'll be my right-hand man on the most dangerous dive of my life.
Seeing the thrashing the boys took is a reminder of how tough the Peruvian coast can be in an El Nino year, and that's before grappling with a man-sized squid but I believe that if I approach the squid in their own habitat, they won't attack.
So to back up my theory with science, I'm off to meet a local squid expert.
Watch out, Jay.
Meanwhile, Jay and Charlie are supposed to be working on logistics in town.
Oh, mate.
Mate, it's more hectic than London, bro.
Yeah.
It is just bonkers.
Should we get some food? Typical.
Have you had ceviche before? No.
That is raw fish in there Yeah.
and she's got, like, loads of onion, chilli, loads of salt, and the most important thing is lime, loads of fresh lime, and that, kind of, cures and cooks the fish.
Oh, I hate hot food.
Why do you hate hot food? I just don't like it.
It's too spicy.
I didn't realise I was gonna have so much.
(INDISTINCT) Doing the honours, am I? Bon appetit, mate.
Bon appetit.
Enjoy.
(LAUGHS) What? That's really good.
No? No, not really.
Why don't you like it? It's quite strong.
Yes, it's fish, it's raw fish.
How can you not like that? Can we not cook it? (LAUGHS) What? Back to the job in hand.
As a marine biologist, I know a fair bit about Humboldt squid, but Elky Torres is an expert.
(SPEAKING OWN LANGUAGE) Look at that.
Each one of these suckers is ringed with teeth.
I mean, that's sharp, dude.
That's properly sharp.
That's nasty.
(EXHALES) So, I know squid are intelligent, but how well do they shoal together? That's good to know for a guy who's about to go diving with them.
(SIGHS) This is This is mental.
This is gonna be the scariest dive I'll ever do.
BLOWFISH: We're on the northern coast of Peru, and on the road south to the port of Chimbote, where a boat is waiting to take us to the squid fishing grounds tomorrow.
In the meantime, Charlie's come up with a distraction to calm my nerves.
Apparently, there's a marine delicacy found on this coastline.
Down in that water there, that's where we're gonna find them.
This way, come on.
Hello.
What are those lads doing? I've got a good idea, mate.
I reckon they're fishing for your percebes.
Hola, amigo.
Goose barnacles, locally known as "percebes", sell for £200 a kilo in fish markets in Europe.
They live on rocks, which are relentlessly battered by huge ocean waves.
Fishing for percebes is one of the most dangerous jobs in Peru.
Plenty of people have died doing what Charlie is about to do.
Pretty treacherous out there, you know, there's some sharp rocks.
Before Charlie can even start to look for percebes, he has to get to the most exposed rocky outcrops.
Right.
OK, it's starting to look a bit dodgy now.
Man, there's big waves, huh? One big wave here, and his fishing trip is over.
Even the fisherman is getting nervous.
He wants Charlie to wear a safety rope.
Any mistakes round here, you're getting crunched.
Mate, it's serious, serious swell coming in, right? Yeah.
Jay will hold Charlie's lifeline, good practice for my squid dive.
Hold on, Charlie! Another big one coming in.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! The waves are so strong, the barnacles have to weld themselves onto the rocks.
So fishing for them means chiselling them away with a metal stick.
OK, there's a good one in here, there's a big one here.
Hold on! (GRUNTS) Whoa! This is a pretty extreme form of fishing.
Seriously, you're roped up down a rock face in the Pacific, hunting for these crazy-looking little creatures.
Look at them.
Brace yourself! Brace yourself! Whoa! (COUNTS IN SPANISH) Ugh.
Charlie, you'll have to wrap it up, mate.
The waves are picking up.
We need to get back now.
Sorry, I was getting carried away, big man.
Charlie's got a good haul.
Fishy! The mighty hunter returns! Look at these, man! Mate, respect to this guy, out there is, like, the most insane environment to work in.
You saw those waves? Exactly.
I was on the rocks watching you getting put through the washing machine by Mother Ocean.
She was giving you a right seeing-to.
Well, Charlie boy, success, matey.
(INDISTINCT) Boys, that was worth all the effort.
Yeah.
What an experience.
I've always wanted to do that.
A successful trip for Charlie, and Jay was impressive holding the lifeline, but it's done nothing to calm my fears.
It's early morning in the Peruvian fishing port of Chimbote.
We're about to set sail on our mission to dive with Humboldt squid.
I've spent over 40 hours underwater and swum with deadly sharks but tonight, I'm attempting the most dangerous dive of my life.
The chainmail suit that should protect me from the squid has arrived, but at over ten kilos Wow.
It's a weight I could do without.
This is a serious piece of kit, this.
On top of everything else - the journey, the dive conditions, the animal - now I've got to wear this.
(SIGHS) It's something that could save me, but also sink me.
(SIGHS) We'll travel for ten hours to the deep ocean, 100km out to sea.
When night falls, I'll attempt to go head-to-head with the Humboldt.
Let's get on it.
Oh, that was That was nimble! (LAUGHS) Your hand.
No, I'm fine.
He's all right.
He's a man.
I just need to wait for it to come a bit closer.
Oh, good lad.
Oh, look at that.
He made it look easy.
It's no luxury vessel, but this boat chases fish every day in the turbulent Pacific.
On board, Jay and Charlie will be my lifeline and morale-boosters.
It's pirate prevention.
They're actually protecting us from getting boarded and getting looted.
It's not quite the Ark Royal, but it will do.
After nine hours out at sea, we're finally nearing the fishing grounds.
Time to get ready.
We've flown out one of the best dive safety teams in the world, and before we go any further, they want me to do a rehearsal daytime dive to check everything out.
This is part of the dive.
This is my chance to go in, have a feel, and if I come up on the other side and I'm not smiling, we can talk about it with the team, and that's the kind of thing where you think, 'Well, if I'm not happy, do you pull out?' Dive conditions in an El Nino year are more unpredictable than ever Shark armour.
Mm-hm.
Heavy.
and it's not just the swell I need protecting from.
This chainmail should prevent the squid from lacerating my skin, but, man, is it heavy.
It's the last thing I want to wear tonight in the deep ocean.
Pull it over my head.
As final prep takes place, bad news comes in.
It seems a storm is heading straight for us, and the sea state suddenly changes, producing the big, rolling swell we were dreading.
It's like filling up your car with water, isn't it? Oh, man, that feels so good.
With the sun beating down on me in this thick wetsuit and chainmail, my body temperature and anxiety is rapidly rising.
MAN: That's good.
When I do this for real tonight, it'll be in pitch black.
MAN: One, two, three.
Well done, Fish.
Come down.
That's good, sit there.
Fish, do it for marine biology.
(INDISTINCT) Yes, you know it.
And we have power.
All right, mate.
Well, good luck, yeah? Yeah, dude, see you in a bit.
See you in a bit.
See you on top side, bro.
(INDISTINCT) And they are off.
It's too dangerous to dive from the main boat, so we have to take a small dinghy out to sea but within minutes, we're in danger of being overwhelmed by rough water.
No No, this boat can't take it.
It can't take it all (INDISTINCT) .
.
she's gone.
Nah, go back.
What's wrong? The boat can't take it.
It's too overloaded.
We'll go back.
Normally, a boat this size wouldn't be a problem, but a combination of the incoming storm and my chainmail suit is making this too treacherous.
The sea, the swell is too big, OK? Every time we go into the wave, it's coming over the top of us.
This is too dangerous for three men.
With the chain mail on, it's just too heavy.
Without a rehearsal dive, my dream of diving with Humboldt squid is crushed.
All right, guys, we tried, all right? I mean, I imagine Fish, right now, is feeling just an absolute feeling of deflation, because today everything seemed to be clicking into place, he was in good form, he was in good spirits, he was laughing and joking.
Now this has happened, who knows what sort of state he's going to be in? (GRUNTS) Gutted, man.
I know you are, I know.
The storm is set to get more severe over the next 24 hours, and our only choice is to retreat.
El Nino's unpredictable weather has dealt us its final blow.
You go through a lot of You put yourself through a lot of stress to get into the boat, and we were there.
(EXHALES HEAVILY) (SNIFFLING) No diving today, mate.
This time, my dream of diving with this mysterious creature of the deep won't become a reality but I refuse to give up.
One day I will swim with squid.
I'm going to go away from here with a burning urge to finish what I started.
Going back to the drawing board.
I'm gonna dive with Humboldt squid, that's the end of it.
I'm gonna do it.
Not today, not tomorrow, but I'm gonna do it.
So Peru may have beaten us, but it certainly didn't break us.