Gilmore Girls s04e14 Episode Script

The Incredible Sinking Lorelais

- I love them.
|- I love them, too.
With unbridled passion.
Good one, huh? I love horse humor.
These guys are the best I've got.
|'Cause they're so sweet.
Michel, come on over.
|Meet our two new employees.
You know that I do not care|for the animal kingdom.
Want me to hold them for you?|I've got a couple of others interested.
Yes, definitely hold them.
It's Rory.
Talk please.
Hi, Rory, it's me.
How's school?|You learning stuff? Listen, we have the horses,|Desdemona and Cletus.
And the first two rides|have to be me and you.
Hopefully you're over the time that I took|you for the pony ride, the pony was old and it stopped and laid down,|and you rolled off into the ditch.
It's really not likely to happen again.
I promise.
So, call me.
Tom, how do you like our new horses? Very fragrant.
Follow me.
He's real busy.
|Don't judge him too harshly.
Guys, how's National Goof-Off Day going? That's what I thought.
We got downstairs hardware|being delivered on Wednesday morning.
- Yippee!|- Yeah, it excites me, too.
It would be exciting to have|one of you here to see if it's the right stuff.
Otherwise, things would come|to a crashing halt.
I got back-to-back meetings on Wednesday|and one of them is in Hartford.
I can be here.
No, I can't.
Davey has a checkup|that morning.
- Can you move it?|- This doctor's really booked.
I can try.
- Michel?|- I'm at the Tally Rand making the money that keeps me from|having to stand at expressway off-ramps selling bags of cherries.
Okay, I guess I can move|some things around - What is that?|- That's your phone.
- Whose phone?|- Our phone? I installed it this morning.
You wanted your phone running, right?|To take reservations? - Oh, my God.
|- Our first reservation.
Quick, answer before they hang up.
- Hello?|- Dragonfly.
- Say "Dragonfly Inn.
"|- I mean, Dragonfly Inn.
Hello.
Why, yes! We are taking reservations.
Our opening day is May 6.
May 8 and 9, okay, great.
Let me just check.
Okay.
You got it, and you're getting our best|room.
Let me get your information here.
Yes.
Okay.
And your number? Okay, "7873.
" Got your name.
Got your number.
|Got you down for May 8 and 9.
Thank you, Mr.
Turner.
See you then.
We're up and running.
- But you wrote it down on a gum wrapper.
|- So? It's embarrassing.
|This is an historical document.
Who cares what she wrote it down on? Big Red wrapper.
Juicy Fruit would have been better? Well, I'm going to go out|and get a value pack for when things really start|getting busy around here.
Mom, it's me.
|I left you a message at home, too.
I love that you got horses.
As far as that pony ride when I was a kid you're forgetting one little tidbit there.
That pony did not lie down.
He died, okay? And then the owner dragged him away|by the back legs.
Every time I use glue I think of him.
|I'll watch you ride.
How's that? Call me back, bye.
- What are you doing here?|- I live here.
But you have Game Theory class|in 15 minutes.
I thought I would lie down for a while.
You were up too late last night.
|I should've said "Lights out.
" - I had to finish my paper.
|- Your brain needs sleep.
- It can sleep when I finish.
|- And then there'll be another paper.
- Mom.
|- You know what I mean.
- You look out for me.
|- That's what I do.
Go lay down.
- Yes, ma'am.
|- And stay off drugs.
What's that smell? It's the smoke from my soldering iron.
I love it.
I love burning things.
I love the hot tip of my soldering iron|as it liquefies metal and singes- Honey, how long you been doing that? - Three hours.
|- Take a break.
Good, you're all here,|so we can clear this up.
I found this lying around,|and it must belong to one of you because who else|would have clothing here? I ask you.
Anyone? - Paris.
|- Anyone? You know, maybe I misspoke.
|It may not be a shirt.
Anyone lose a car cover? Anyone? Knock it off.
I'm just trying to find a way to tell you|that your behemoth boyfriend is getting too comfortable around here.
|And I speak for everyone.
- Leave me out of this.
|- Me, too.
I don't want to walk into our bathroom|and find him sitting on the john - shooting up steroids.
|- He doesn't take steroids.
Meaning that unsightly girth|is nature-given? - He must curse God nightly.
|- Enough.
And the shirt! Stick a pole in it,|Cirque du Soleil could start selling tickets.
He's big, Paris.
She got it.
Why does he have his name|written on the back? So it's easy to check when he forgets it? Although if he checks it while he's wearing|it he'd have to look in a mirror and think his name was Dlobeelk|and get confused all over again.
Bitter little woman.
If he's gonna continue|being an unwelcome guest in our place I emphasize the word "our,"|keep him penned in your room.
- Jealousy doesn't become you.
|- What jealousy? - Break it up, guys.
|- Nor does makeup or a hairstyle.
- Can it, blondie.
|- You drove your own boyfriend away - so you hate that anyone else has one.
|- Please.
Why don't you go sit alone in your room|and start getting used to how the rest of your life's gonna be.
- I'm not alone.
|- Really? Who do you have besides|your poster of Noam Chomsky? - Who do I have?|- Yeah.
That's what I thought.
Very sad.
I'm gonna grab Barbie's neck and squeeze|until her hair falls out and she's dead.
Are you staying?|I wanted to close my eyes for a while.
I should just tell her|Asher Fleming's my man.
So she can compare her circa-1972|Lou Ferrigno with him.
Then tell her.
Put this to rest.
We're keeping it on the down-low.
|You're the only person that knows.
Then you'll have to swallow stuff like that|and not let it get to you.
He smells.
That fat tub of hers smells.
Did you keep your notes|when you took Major English Poets? - I've got them somewhere.
|- Can I borrow them? 'Cause that means I can skip a class|this week.
Buys me two hours.
I taught Asher that phrase,|"On the down-low.
" - He called it delightful.
|- It's a delightful phrase.
Maybe it's not Janet's boyfriend|that I can't be around.
Maybe I just can't be around boys,|because I have a man.
Yes, that's it.
Resting now.
Wait.
I've got nothing cute to say|for my message.
Puppies.
There, that's cute.
|Now leave yours.
- Hello? Pick up.
|- Wait, I'm here.
I'm running as we speak to not be late for my first officiaI day|as a full-fledged food-hall card-swiper.
I'm no longer a trainee.
|After 90 minutes of rigorous training I am fully independent|and in no need of supervision.
Whoops, sorry! Just ran into somebody, and he's down.
- I assume you're really proud of me.
Later.
|- Wait, hold it.
I'm coming.
Rory, I'm here.
Of course, you had to be in a big hurry.
- It's Rory.
Talk please.
|- Hi.
Of course I'm proud.
Card swiping,|who knew you had it in you? Not I! I'm sorry I can't be there|to witness this moment.
It's certainly as big a moment|as your first baby step and your first fall on your face,|which came back-to-back.
Hopefully somebody's taking|lots of pictures.
Call my cell or call me at Jason's.
|We've got to stop meeting like this.
Bye.
Rory, if you're gonna ignore me,|I might as well go hang out with my ex-girlfriend.
It's the same thing.
- Sorry, Glen.
|- Everyone is going to be sorry one day.
Everyone.
You really gotta stop watching|"Taxi Driver," Glen.
Did you want me to It works for me.
Hello.
Rory.
Hi, it's Dean.
Dean, hi.
- Bad time?|- No.
I just thought you would be my mom but my mom doesn't speak|in a resonant basso profundo.
- A what?|- I'm babbling.
So I wanted to run something by you|to see if it was okay.
- Sure.
|- You know the contractor, Tom? - Grumpy-puss?|- That's him.
He's offered me a job working on his crew.
It's good pay, flexible hours.
- Excellent.
|- At the inn.
Your mom's inn.
- Is that okay?|- The Dragonfly? If it's not okay, I won't do it.
Why wouldn't it be okay? It would put you and me|around each other and I didn't know how awkward|that would be.
No.
Dean, it's fine.
|It wouldn't be awkward at all.
- You sure?|- Tom knows quality.
Take the job.
Good.
I just didn't know where we stood|after my wedding and all.
You guys didn't come.
I'm so sorry about that.
- It was short notice.
|- And we got jammed on some things.
But you got our gift? Lindsay spins a salad in it every night.
That's weird,|considering we got you a toaster.
- No, you didn't.
|- I'm joshing you.
I guess I'll take the job.
Are you still going to school? Part-time, but everything's good.
- I've got a five-year plan.
|- Five years.
Cool.
I've got about the next|two-and-a-half hours planned and then there's just darkness|and possibly some dragons.
I made the plunge.
|I got my own cell phone.
I thought you sounded a little cell-phoney.
Lindsay and her mom|got a good deal on a family plan so I signed up.
It was time.
You know,|I don't even know your number anymore.
- I can give you this one.
|- Actually, I can just save it.
- You are officially part of my phone log.
|- Good.
Well, I'll let you go - and I'll see you once in a while.
|- Inevitably.
You'll have to tell me what|that bass thing was that you said.
- Something to look forward to.
|- Bye.
Come on.
Step up.
Don't be mice.
No, we did pick a tile for the|bedroom suite bathroom, I remember Make it a semicolon before the clause|about interest rates, keep reading.
Eight weeks ago? Ten weeks ago? No, it is okay to end a sentence with|a preposition.
I read it in Safire's column.
I don't remember the tile.
|I do remember the color.
White.
Safire, he came up with "nattering|nabobs of negativism" for Agnew.
No, I meant the tile was white,|but the guy was, too.
Agnew was Nixon's Vice President.
|Can you just please keep reading? Over 200 shades of white?|I did not know that.
With "sincerely yours," et cetera,|forge my signature and get it out tonight.
- We'll look at the samples again.
Bye.
|- I'll see you tomorrow.
Thank you.
Okay, I am done.
Round two? This is very romantic.
I'm over here arguing about tile you're over there arguing|about William Safire whatever happened|to the cigarette after sex? Trust me, William Safire is much hotter.
We're the all-business corporate couple.
Brought to you by Marriott.
- I gotta get that.
|- No.
I told Rory to call me here.
Hello? Guess who's demanding|we all make an appearance at lunch? - Mom.
|- Your grandmother is coming back - from Palm Beach.
|- What are you doing? Your father has to run over to her house|to open it up for her.
And then she will be coming|here for the evening to berate me and tell me|that my couch has some sort of smell.
- That sounds fun.
|- She wants to have lunch sorry, a luncheon, the day after tomorrow.
You, me, your father, and apparently|she wants to meet Jason.
All we need is that filthy Eminem fellow|to make it a perfect afternoon for me.
I tried to track to him down, Mom,|but he might be on tour.
Just be here on time,|and get your hair cut.
You looked like the bird lady from|"Mary Poppins" the last time I saw you.
I've been very busy lately.
I don't care how busy|you've been, Lorelai if your hair looks a mess,|it will be my fault and I don't need that responsibility.
|I'll see you at noon.
- What are you doing?|- Getting undressed.
- You were already undressed.
|- My mother called.
- So?|- I can't talk to my mother naked.
- How would she know?|- She'd know.
Is it, like, a super power?|She can hear naked people? Yes, she can.
She can hear sin and depravity|and all sorts of lustful things.
Boy, do I wish I could get bitten|by that radioactive spider.
Please try to work me in.
My hair is long and unmanageable,|and I need that scalp-massaging thing that Cindy does after she washes my hair.
It makes me think I'm in Tahiti.
They put pipes in the kitchen.
|We're almost able to run water.
Sookie, give me a second here.
Is Cindy there?|She's usually able to work me in.
I'm not trying to go around you.
|Cindy and I are old friends.
They are beautiful pipes.
|The pipes are really big.
- The pipes will be there in two minutes?|- Sure.
It won't take long.
It's an easy cut.
|I'm very low maintenance.
I might not seem like it now,|but I'd be a delight to have in the place and I'll even dry my own hair.
|I'll bring my own blow dryer.
Yes? Tomorrow? Yes.
Hi, Lorelai.
- Dean.
So you're working here?|- Yeah.
I thought Rory would have told you.
- Rory and I keep missing each other.
|- I'm here, and your hair looks fine to me.
You're very kind.
Lorelai, can I talk to you and Sookie|over here for a minute? - See you.
|- Bye.
Sook? - Tom, I gotta tell you, these pipes!|- She's very thrilled about the pipes.
They're terrific pipes.
And you got that|fancy sink coming in tomorrow morning.
They can't install it until I see it,|because I have very specific sink needs.
They won't even leave it|without your approval.
Can you guys give us a little space here? You okay, Tom? - Now this is kind of tricky.
|- What is? - You know I like you two, right?|- We know that.
I gotta deal with jerks in my business,|yelling at you when it's not your fault bugging you about budget increases|you got no control over.
You don't do that.
You always smell good, too.
That's a plus.
So maybe the checks are getting lost|in the mail.
I'm guessing it's like that.
What checks? Our checks? It's just, in the last few weeks,|we've been having some cash flow issues.
This is hard.
- Are we not paying him?|- I've been wanting to talk to you, Tom.
- We're not paying him?|- We are, just not the way we should be.
- It's been an avalanche lately.
|- You got a lot happening here, all at once.
I feel very antsy right now like I just ate some dark chocolate|and drank an espresso.
Let me talk to Tom for a second.
We'll clear it up, really.
Go.
Boy, I'm sorry about this.
|It's just been a deluge.
It's the home stretch,|that's usually when a deluge hits.
I was talking to the bank|about a line of credit - but they didn't go for it.
|- Banks suck.
I meant to talk to you sooner.
If I don't get paid, I can't pay my guys,|then they tend to stop showing up.
- Do you have to shut down?|- I can keep it going a while longer.
- For the jerks, I'd shut down.
You guys, no.
|- Thank you.
Thanks, Tom.
- Now, hug? No hug.
|- I'm kind of dirty.
How about if you whistle at me later|in front of the guys when I walk by? - Drive them nuts.
|- You got it.
I should have talked to you sooner.
- Are we dead broke?|- Getting there.
We will start cutting corners.
I don't need that big, fancy stove|from France.
- We'll skip that.
|- No way.
It's too expensive,|and I don't want it that much.
You have four pictures in your wallet.
One of Jackson, one of the baby,|and two of that stove.
You're getting that stove.
- We could drop the horses.
|- Desi and Cletus? Over my dead body.
The upkeep is astronomical.
- Maybe if we drop one of the horses.
|- Who's making that choice, Sophie? How about Jackson?|Would he be willing to put up anything? He just bought a bunch of farm equipment.
|He's strapped.
Are you suddenly on super fantastic terms|with your parents? If by fantastic, you mean are we as close|as that one-armed surfer girl and the shark, then yes.
- Then what about Luke?|- What about him? - He's offered before.
|- Out of pity.
We're pretty damn pitiable right now.
- He's our friend.
|- He's more than that.
And he's a hermit,|so we know he's got money and if he didn't want to lend it to you|he would tell you.
That would be embarrassing.
More than Tom almost crying|'cause we're not paying him? No, I guess not.
I'll put my thinking cap on,|you put yours on and if we come up with someone better,|we'll talk.
- But we'll keep Luke as a last resort.
|- Last resort.
- This is ridiculous, Paris.
|- He can sit in your room.
- I'm getting ready.
|- He can sit in the hallway.
- What's your problem?|- I'll tell you my problem, Andre.
Last time you sat on our couch, your|mesomorphic frame carved a crater in it.
- It was like sitting in a bucket.
|- You're so full of it.
Kids were skateboarding up and down it.
Gandalf the Gray is still falling down it.
|It was a big hole.
- What does "mesomorphic" mean?|- Means you've got a fat ass.
- Just ignore her and sit, Klee.
|- Do not sit, Klee.
- It's my place, too.
|- Yours, not that Brobdingnagian twit's.
Everybody I bring here|has to pass your anal standards? He has to pass through the door|without damaging the frame.
- Forget it.
Just come into my room.
|- Good.
- Got another hot night at the library?|- He's still in here.
There's nothing like|the bitterness of the lonely.
Nice addition, Potsie.
Go put on your spinster dress.
I'm moving.
Or she is.
|One of us has gotta go.
- I really hate when you guys fight.
|- Calling me a spinster.
I should stick a javelin in her brain.
- You should tell her about the professor.
|- What? What did you say? Just that she thinks you're not dating.
|You are, aren't you? Asher Fleming? So, busy-busy.
I know you are, too.
|I think I'm coming down with swipe wrist.
It's like carpal tunnel, only swipier.
|Call me if you have suggestions on how to combat this,|or if you have Jerry Lewis' number his next telethon should be for me.
- Rory.
|- Paris, you scared me.
You told - Come here.
|- I'm working.
- Swipe them yourself, people.
|- What? - You told Lane about me and Asher?|- What? That was a secret between you and me.
|You're the only one I told.
- I just told Lane.
|- She was blabbing it around our suite.
That doesn't sound like Lane.
She probably told everyone.
|Who else did you blab it to? - I didn't blab it, I just told Lane.
|- That's blabbing.
I told her before she had|any connection to Yale.
- She wasn't living here.
|- She shouldn't be.
- What?|- She knows too much.
- Are you going to kill her?|- No one else knows? - No.
|- Your milkman, your minister? Just Lane.
I can tell her|not to bring it up ever again especially at Yale, especially in our room.
- She shouldn't be here.
|- It's temporary.
The suite's crowded enough with|the four of us plus the Jolly Green Giant and everyone else passing through.
- You're mad at what she said.
|- Janet and Tanna think so, too.
- No, they don't.
|- We've talked.
Ask them.
- I will.
After my shift.
|- I know you like having her around.
That she brings back memories|of those sunshiney Stars Hollow days when you would skip through fields|of flowers and sing Carpenters songs.
But she doesn't belong here,|she belongs there.
And do me a favor and stop blabbing.
Hi.
- Hi.
|- Hello.
Janet? Could you stop sit-upping for a sec? I'm done.
What's up? - Well, Paris-|- Don't talk to me about Paris.
I know, she said some stupid things.
- What a tremendous shock.
|- Yeah.
And I'm a little mad that|she dragged you two into it.
What did she drag us into? She said that you guys weren't happy|that Lane is still staying here which is weird because Lane|has been practically invisible.
When she's not cleaning the bathroom or picking up out here|or bringing us coffee.
And that's not true,|that you're tired of her being here, is it? - That's just Paris.
|- It is a little weird.
It is? - It's kind of close quarters in here.
|- I know.
- She doesn't go here.
|- I know that, too.
It's weird.
- You guys have all talked about it?|- We thought she'd be gone by now.
I'm not good at confrontations.
Personally, I'd vote Paris out|over Lane in a heartbeat but Paris goes here.
I see.
- Are you mad?|- No.
Carry on.
How was work? Fine.
Dull.
- You gonna study some more?|- I'm gonna have to.
- You look very serious.
|- Yeah.
- Paris talk to you?|- Yeah.
- She was very mad.
|- Yes.
I'm out, aren't I? - It's okay.
It couldn't last forever, it's time.
|- It's not time.
- Let me talk to them again.
|- No.
It's time.
I can't be here forever.
|I don't even go here.
The janitor's always here.
|He doesn't go here.
- He works here.
|- So get a job here.
- Jobs here are for the students.
|- The janitor's not a student.
- You know what I mean.
|- So enroll.
- Go to Yale.
|- Or be a janitor.
Yale, janitor, in 100 years,|we'll all be dead.
It's all the same.
This hasn't been fair to anyone here.
|I need to go.
I'll go tomorrow morning.
We used to talk about living together.
|Remember, when we were little? I know.
It was going to be a house|made of cheese.
We had much debate about that.
It was down to chocolate,|cheese, or Brillo Pads.
- Why Brillo Pads?|- I think that just made us laugh.
- You brought Stars Hollow here.
|- I'll visit.
I promise.
Good.
Maybe one day we'll live|in a house made of cheese.
I hope so.
I love shampoo sinks.
They're like a hot tub for your head.
Leanne, don't tell Cindy, but you're better.
|Much better.
Those hands.
Not now.
- Ignore it.
|- It could be my daughter.
We've been missing each other for days.
- Sorry.
|- Okay.
Hello? No, this is she.
No, Sookie's there.
|Yes, it was all arranged.
You've looked everywhere? In the kitchen,|near the pipes? Did you look there? No, don't leave, please.
I'll get someone down there to sign for it.
|Just please don't leave.
I know.
Ten minutes.
Okay.
Sookie, where are you? Hi, this is Sookie and Jackson and Davey.
|And Davey wants to say hello, too.
Go ahead Davey, say hello.
Come on, say hi.
- He's licking the phone.
|- Don't lick the phone.
Little Peepers, does the phone taste good? For God's sake.
I think it tastes like candy.
Do you want to say it tastes like candy? He waved! Okay, so here comes the beep.
Shorten it, de-cute it, and call me back.
Tally Rand HoteI, may I help you? Michel, good.
Listen, emergency.
|Can you- You are not going to believe this.
Celine Dion is here.
|I'm not five feet away from her.
Cool, spiffy, is there any way you could- My heart is pounding through my chest.
She's so beautiful.
She's very pretty.
Listen! She's lovelier in person|than she is on TV, and so nice.
I've only heard good things about her.
|Can you please- And I have a pimple today.
|Of all the days to have a pimple.
Michel, listen.
Can you get to the inn?|It's really important and Sookie didn't show and I'm desperate.
- I can't get away.
|- I've got wet hair.
She sneezed.
|I should give her my hanky.
Forget it.
I'll talk to you later.
Leanne, what can you do for my hair|in two minutes? I figured.
Coming.
Okay, I'm coming.
You said you would meet|the sink guy at the inn.
- I did?|- Yes, Sookie, you did.
You said you would meet him|to approve the sink and sign for it.
- Tom could have done that.
|- No, Sookie, Tom couldn't have done that.
Because you insisted that you had to|approve the sink before it was installed.
- I did?|- Yeah.
I did, didn't I? Shoot! Oh, sugarfoot.
If there was ever a time to use|the real word, this would be it.
Just call them, and have them deliver|the sink tomorrow.
No, Sookie,|they can't deliver the sink tomorrow.
- Why?|- Because they sent it back to Canada.
- Why would they do that?|- Because that's where its mother is.
I'm sorry, I got no sleep last night.
Davey|cried forever.
I finally got him to sleep and I must have fallen asleep with him.
Sookie, I was counting on you.
|Now they have to reship it back here which means we have to repay|the shipping fee.
- Why didn't you call Michel?|- I did.
He couldn't come.
You want coffee? I am so tired.
|This is so typical.
He's always complaining about|not being included and then he finally gets a chance,|and he won't come.
Sookie, Michel has a job.
|We're not paying him.
- I know, but still.
|- Sookie.
Stop, turn, look.
- What do you think of my hair?|- Too much product.
Sookie, for the past six weeks,|I have taken every meeting.
I have been at the inn around the clock.
|I haven't had a second for myself.
All I asked for was just one hour|to get my hair done and two seconds into the shampoo,|I get a call from a guy who sounds like a "Kids in the Hall" character telling me|to get to the inn to okay a sink that I don't know how to okay|because I don't know what makes it okay.
You know what makes it okay,|that's why you said you would - be there to say if it was okay.
|- I'm sorry I missed the meeting - but I have a baby here.
|- Yes, I know, believe me.
- That's all I've heard about lately.
|- Excuse me for procreating.
- We have a business we're launching.
|- I missed a meeting.
- Every meeting.
|- I said I'm sorry.
I don't need you to be sorry.
|I need you to be there.
What do you want me to do?|I have a baby.
Sookie, we're drowning here.
I wasn't|supposed to do everything by myself.
- That's why I have a partner.
|- I didn't know I was gonna be pregnant - when we decided to open the inn.
|- If you'd known, we wouldn't be partners? No! I mean This isn't the stuff|I'm supposed to help with, anyhow.
- What are you talking about?|- The planning, the decision making I've never been any good at that.
My part|comes later, when we open the inn.
- I need you before then.
|- I'm doing the best I can.
Fine.
I have to go.
What are we gonna do about the sink? - Hey, Luke.
|- Lane, you're back in town? - Well, yeah.
As of today.
|- You're not staying with Rory anymore? It was kind of time for me to move on,|considering I don't actually go to Yale.
- You need some help?|- Nope, I'm good.
- I've been waiting for 10 minutes.
|- Sorry, not even close to the record.
Listen, I was wondering|if I could maybe get my job back.
I know I was wrong to take off like that.
|I totally left you in the lurch.
I'm willing to work overtime hours for|nothing, if you'd give me another chance.
- Sure.
|- Really? My God, thank you, Luke.
|Should I start right now? - Yes.
|- Your shift tonight will be fine.
Okay, my shift tonight.
I'll be here.
Lorelai.
I really want to thank you.
- You're very welcome.
For what?|- For letting me stay with you.
- You're staying with me?|- Yes.
- And I knew this?|- Rory told you.
- Rory told me, yeah!|- She did tell you, right? - She said she was gonna call.
|- Hey, Mom.
Lane needs to stay with you- - I guess you're staying with me.
|- Is that okay? - It's okay.
Make sure your mom knows.
|- I will.
See you at home.
- Thanks, Luke, see you later.
|- We'll be here.
- Sit down, Ed.
Pigs, gluttons.
|- Customers.
- How can people eat this much?|- This isn't all for one person, Luke.
It's disgusting.
It's making me|sick to my stomach.
Have you ever thought|that maybe you're in the wrong industry? I should get rid of the plates.
|Make them all strap on a feedbag.
Hang bells around their necks.
|Enter them in county fairs.
Come again soon.
See you.
Listen, could you hit the pause button|on the rant for just a sec? What do you need? I was wondering|if we could have dinner tonight.
Dinner? I need to discuss something with you,|and I thought we could do it over dinner.
- Unless you and Nicole have-|- She's in Boston this week.
- How about Silvano's? 8:00.
|- Why don't you come here? I can make- - No, this isn't diner talk.
It's more official.
|- Are you being drafted? - Yes, that's it.
|- You have to wear a tie at Silvano's.
No, just a jacket.
You can take it off|as soon as we sit down.
- Okay, 8:00.
|- I'll see you there.
- Love the hat.
|- Living on a prayer, baby.
- Hello, Lane.
|- Hello, Mrs.
Kim.
- I'm staying at Lorelai's.
|- Wear socks.
Okay.
and I'll return your call|as soon as possible.
Thanks.
I'm on my way to my professor's office,|to ask him a question about his last lecture, because my pen|was giving out and I can't read my writing,|which is not at all true.
However, it will give him a perfect opportunity to discuss my paper|with me.
I'm sure he's graded it by now.
I'm sure I'm in for a big, "Nicely done,|Miss Gilmore, how about an A?" Call me.
- Come in.
|- Prof.
Gilbert? Hi, I'm Rory Gilmore.
I'm in your|Tuesday afternoon Game Theory class.
- I hope I'm not disturbing you.
|- Come in.
Thank you.
I was wondering|if I could go over a couple of things|from your lecture the other day.
I wrote something down here,|but I cannot for the life of me read my own handwriting.
|If I had this analyzed Charlize Theron would be playing me|in a movie.
'Cause I'd be a serial killer,|and pretty girls like to get fat and play serial killers.
'Cause they win|an Oscar and I'm sorry, should I go on? Or you can wait to let me find your paper.
So we can talk about|why you're really here.
- Okay.
|- Rory Gilmore.
Yes, here we are.
Yes.
Right.
Okay.
Good you came in.
- It is?|- Yes.
In this paper, you were supposed|to use a real-world example to compare and contrast Classical|Economic Theory and Game Theory, yes? Your paper dealt well enough|with the Game Theory portion.
However, you then diverged|into a discussion on the pollution problem in Mexico City.
It felt to me like someone using|knowledge from a different course to pad their paper and thereby|avoid doing research for mine.
- No, I just-|- I've seen this happen before particularly to freshmen.
Usually,|it means they're overloading themselves.
That they don't understand the demands|of a Yale academic curriculum.
I took the liberty of looking over your|schedule.
I think that's what you've done.
No.
I'm fine, really.
I just have a little|trouble with Game Theory, that's all.
I blame my mother.
She always made up|games at home when I was growing up.
I begged her for Monopoly.
|But she insisted on - "Mimic your favorite Sweathog" so-|- I talked to your advisor.
- She has the same concern that I do.
|- What concern is that? You're taking too many courses.
|Your workload is too heavy.
- I'll try harder.
|- I think you should drop this course.
You have a couple of weeks|before the end of the drop period.
You can take the course|when you have more time to devote to it.
My grandfather took this same|workload when he went here.
Different people work at different paces.
You shouldn't compare yourself|to anyone else.
You work at a slower pace.
- I don't.
I'm not-|- The choice is ultimately yours.
You can stay.
But this is a D paper.
This is not a big deal.
|This happens to a lot of students.
Okay.
Glad to be fitting in.
- Hi.
I'm-|- Get in here right now.
My granny must be here.
Jersey, close the door|and get those nuts in the living room.
I've been alone with that woman|for over two hours now.
Real arm in the coat, Mom.
- Your father's late.
You're late.
|- I'm not late, just in pain.
- Get in the living room.
|- I can't arrive before the nuts.
Don't start with me.
Here she is, Mom.
Lorelai.
|The party just gets bigger.
Hi, Gran, how are you doing?|You look great.
Emily, what is the matter with her hair? I know my granddaughter.
|If she had received proper notice of my arrival, she would have|done something about it.
- I told her in plenty of time.
|- She really did, Gran.
I swear.
I think it is admirable of you|to cover for your mother.
The importance of family loyalty simply cannot be measured.
Sit, dear.
Other than your hair, you look well.
|Are you well? Emily, perhaps the girl would like a drink.
- I am very well.
|- Good.
How is Rory? - She's just as healthy as I am.
|- And her hair is perfect.
And how is she doing at Yale? She's doing great.
Studying her butt off.
How charming to hear.
I'm glad she's|doing well.
She is a Gilmore, after all.
Gilmores have always excelled at Yale.
- They have quite a legacy to live up to.
|- Your legacy is safe with her.
Mom, here are the nuts.
Thank you, Emily, for that announcement.
How wonderful that you don't need|some sort of amplification system in order to make sure|that everyone in the area is informed - about the arrival of the nuts.
|- I'm sorry.
- Strange woman.
So excited about nuts.
|- I smell jasmine.
You smell impatience.
|Where have you been? You know very well where I have been.
I had some work to get out of the way|so I could devote my attention to you.
You look wonderful.
|Florida agrees with you.
Florida agrees with muscle-bound men|who dress like women.
I am much happier to be back here|where I belong.
Would you like a nut? They seem|to be very important to your wife.
- I thought you liked those nuts, Mom.
|- I'm fine, Trix.
I have someone I would like you to meet.
Lorelai, have you been there|the whole time? - Yes, I have.
|- I didn't see you.
I had my cloaking device activated, so - Trix, this is my partner, Jason Stiles.
|- Jason, this is my mother.
- It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs.
Gilmore.
|- You are very young.
- No.
Not so young.
|- I think I know if someone is young or not.
For God's sake, Jason.
Just be young.
Cloaking device.
|Never leave home without it.
Richard Gilmore.
|You're growing a mustache.
I know.
The Ferrari is arriving on Tuesday.
- I like it.
|- Thank you, Trix.
It makes you look like Adolphe Menjou.
Or Adolphe Menjou's cocaine dealer.
What is that? Actually, this is a little present|that I got for you.
- For me?|- Yes.
- Why would you give me a present?|- Well- - It's not my birthday.
It's not Christmas.
|- Yes, but- - You don't even know me.
|- No.
But you're Richard's mother.
- So I thought-|- What is this present that you got for an old woman you've never met? - It's a book.
|- What sort of book? It's a book on French antiques.
- I heard you liked French antiques.
|- I do like French antiques.
You can just open it later.
Absolutely not.
I am company.
|You don't answer the phone when you have company.
|So put it away and turn it off.
Yes, Gran.
Shall we all take turns guessing|how long it will be before lunch is served? - I will say an hour.
Richard?|- You are bad, Trix.
Hi, this is Lorelai Gilmore.
|And you've reached my cell phone.
Leave a message and I'll return your call- - Hey, you on the phone?|- No, I'm just checking my messages.
- Anything important?|- No, just a hang up.
Good.
You know, I should get a globe.
Every time you see a movie,|and there's a really important character and then you go into that character's|office, they always have a globe.
You're hiding from my grandmother,|aren't you? - She is scarier than Nick Nolte's mug shot.
|- Come on.
Please, she's just gonna ask me|why I got her a present again.
We have decided to just go sit at the table.
Perhaps the food will appear|by sheer wish fulfillment.
- I'll check on it again, Mom.
|- Please don't.
I wouldn't want to disturb your cook.
She's obviously|in the middle of a crossword puzzle.
- Lorelai, where did you go?|- Sorry, Gran.
I had to check my messages.
I've got all this construction|going on at the inn.
Yes, your inn.
|Have you seen this inn of hers? Not yet.
It's a mess right now.
|You'll see it when it's done.
- When will that be?|- Soon.
- I see you measure time like your mother.
|- Just let me check on lunch, please? Tell me, Lorelai.
How much money|have you invested in this inn? - A chunk.
|- And I assume that you have a projected timetable|for getting your chunk back out? If everything goes as planned,|we're hoping to break even the first year - and turn a profit the second year.
|- That's optimistic, yes? Yes, but our town has a pretty|regular tourist trade.
Small inns and bed-and-breakfasts|can be real money factories.
Yes, and wonderful places|to put all those French antiques.
We have very high hopes,|and we booked our first reservation.
- When is the reservation?|- May 8.
- Really? That soon?|- You'll be ready by then? We have to be.
We had to add|some extra construction guys.
We'll have to get the sink back|from Canada, but we'll finish in time.
- How is the money holding up?|- Excuse me? The money.
I was somewhat aware|of your financial situation before you took this on.
|How much do you have left? Plenty.
Enough to finish.
- You're in trouble.
|- No.
You are hemorrhaging money.
|I see it in your eyes.
It must be costing a fortune,|to get a contractor to stick to a projected completion date.
|And you're not working now.
Unless your partner is a Rockefeller,|you are in serious financial trouble.
Mom, I don't think this is|the best time to discuss this.
If we were eating, we would have|something to do.
But since we're not - How could you let this happen?|- How could I let this happen? She is your daughter.
|It is your responsibility to know when she is in deep financial trouble.
- I'm not in deep financial trouble.
|- Trix, Lorelai is a grown woman.
Ridiculous.
This is a family.
It is a family's responsibility|to make sure that this doesn't happen.
We have a reputation to uphold.
|How would it look if a Gilmore goes - out into the business world and fails?|- I hardly think she's failing, Mom.
She looks like she's failing to me.
|And I am surprised at you.
After all, I helped you out|when you had financial problems.
- Trix.
|- You made that terrible investment in Dubliners Paper Corporation|when you were first married.
I told you not to, but you wouldn't listen.
|And of course - I had to step in and bail you out.
|- Hold on here, Trix- You would have lost this house|if it weren't for me.
That is not true.
It is not true|that you pigheadedly lost that money? I was 27 years old.
|That is the time to take risks.
When you have my money to bail you out,|taking risks is not a problem, is it? You're making me sound|like an incompetent child.
I have built two extremely successful|businesses, Mother and both of them without your help.
And I do not appreciate you now,|many years later, throwing in my face the fact that you once|helped me out financially.
Do not raise your voice to me.
I will raise my voice|if the situation warrants it.
No, not now.
You paid that money back|in two months, also.
That's right.
Two months.
How deep|in financial ruin could I have been to get that money back|to you in two months? - I'm leaving this table.
|- Let me help you with your chair.
- Hey, Tom, is my mom here?|- I haven't seen her.
She could be inside.
She sometimes slips in the back door.
Likes to surprise a bunch of guys|with nail guns.
Thanks.
Mom? - Rory.
Hey.
|- Do you know where my mom is? - No, did you check outside?|- Yeah, I did.
She's not there.
- She's not at home.
She's not anywhere.
|- You okay? - Yeah, I'm fine.
I can't find her.
|- Well, maybe she's at Sookie's.
- Sookie's? Okay, I can try Sookie's.
|- Rory, what's wrong? Nothing's wrong.
I'm fine, I'm good.
|I'm just having some technical difficulties.
- Get it? Technical difficulties? Very funny.
|- Yeah.
It's very funny.
I am very funny and I'm getting funnier.
|Yale is doing that to me.
I'm just It's developing,|the hilarity.
Where are we going? - Outside.
|- Outside? Sure, I'm used to working a bigger room.
- What's wrong?|- Nothing.
- What's wrong?|- Everything's falling apart.
I thought I had it all under control,|but I don't.
What was under control? Everybody else can handle|the classes, but I can't.
And I'm supposed to.
|I'm supposed to take five classes.
Everybody else does.
|I mean, my grandfather did.
How am I gonna tell|my grandfather that I failed? - You failed?|- I didn't even get a chance to fail.
I had to drop a class.
|I was told to drop a class.
- That's not a big deal.
|- It's a really big deal.
I'm not supposed to drop a class.
|I'm not the drop-a-class person.
- I get good grades.
I handle things.
|- Hey, come on.
And Lane, she's not around anymore.
I know she had to go,|but I miss her, and I liked her there.
I haven't talked to my mom,|I need to talk to her.
And she's not around.
|And I'm failing everything.
I can't do it.
I can't handle it.
I'm messing everything up.
- Just look at this.
|- Look at what? You having to be nice to me.
I mean, you shouldn't have|to be nice to me.
I was horrible to you.
You're married to someone nice|and who's not me and not a failure.
- You are so not a failure.
|- Yes, I am.
I just I can't I need to talk to my mom,|'cause I just don't know what to do.
It's okay.
- Luke.
|- I was just coming to meet you.
I know.
Could we I need to|I'm sorry, I need to reschedule our dinner.
- Sure.
|- Yeah, I'm just very tired.
I'm sorry that I made you|get all dressed up.
It's good for me to do it|every once in a while.
- It reminds me why I'm not an accountant.
|- Okay.
Everything okay? - What?|- You okay? - Why?|- Because you don't look okay.
- Take me now, sailor.
|- I mean, you look distracted.
Distracted, no.
Well, maybe.
|Yeah.
Distracted.
Okay.
Sure.
- I'm very distracted.
|- Anything I can do? There are very few times in my life|when I find myself sitting around thinking,|"I wish I was married.
" But today, I mean I'm happy.
You know? I like my life.
|I like my friends.
I like my stuff.
- My time, my space, my TV.
|- Yeah, sure.
But every now and then,|just for a moment I wish I had a partner.
|Someone to pick up the slack.
Someone to wait for the cable guy.
Make me coffee in the morning.
|Meet the stupid sink - before it gets sent back to Canada.
|- What happened? I just thought I had everything|under control.
But I didn't and the inn is just falling apart.
This has been my dream forever.
|And I have it.
And it's here.
And I'm failing.
I can't handle it.
|I spend every minute running around working and thinking.
|And I thought I would have help but Sookie has Davey, and Michel|has Celine, and I can't do it myself.
I don't even have time to see my kid.
|Hell, forget see her.
Just even talk to her.
And I miss her.
|I sat there in my parents' house just listening to my grandmother|basically call me a charity case I couldn't even argue with her.
|I couldn't even say anything.
Because I'm running out of money|and I don't know what to do about it.
I was gonna ask you|for $30,000 at dinner tonight.
- That's how pathetic I am.
|- $30,000.
Okay.
I mean- I don't have want to talk about it now.
|I don't want to think about it.
I'm failing.
- I'm failing.
|- You are not failing.
I don't know what to do.
It's okay.
Hi, hon.
I'm just seeing|if I could catch you.
But you're out.
Nothing much to report here.
|Just give me a call when you can.
Just checking in.
Nothing big to report.
Okay, give me a call|when you can.
Bye, Mom.
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