House Husbands (2012) s02e03 Episode Script
Season 2, Episode 3
Your father's left me.
Seems he's bonking another woman.
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Justin, it's a mess.
Hey, sometimes, you know, you have to see things in terms of potential.
Do we really have to live here? Are you open to the idea of sharing? We could get a room.
A I mean, a flat Oh.
With rooms with many rooms that we would share.
Yeah.
Stella's biological dad's back.
Don't know, Tommy.
There's going to be some big changes.
Let it go.
Nothing has changed.
EVERYTHING'S changed.
Liam doesn't know that Stella's his daughter, and we don't have to tell him.
Everything stays exactly as it is.
OK, well, what about Stella? If her biological father is back in town, doesn't she have a right to meet him? Do you want to keep your voice down? If you're so keen to keep things the way they are, then why the big secret meeting with Liam? Can you smell something bad? Don't change the subject.
I thought we'd gone over this.
I bumped into him, organised one cup of coffee - that's it.
He has a right to know that Maree died.
But not that she had his baby? Maree didn't want him to know.
And she was my sister.
All along you said that you had no idea who the father was.
Well, I don't know that Liam is the father.
Not for sure.
So now you're just going to sweep it all under the carpet? OK, there's definitely something bad in here somewhere.
Tom, we need to talk about this.
Gumnuts! Great, sweetie.
Come in.
Hello! We brought kebabs and gourmet Oh, jeez! Eugh! Sausages.
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to bid farewell to Frieda.
We didn't know Frieda long, but she made a big impact.
We hope that she is at peace, surrounded by eucalyptus trees, at one with her marsupial mates.
A doll's gone in with Frieda because Frieda needs someone to talk to.
Of course she does.
And a half-drunk bottle of juice in case Frieda gets thirsty.
And now a musical tribute.
Just one verse, girls.
Just one verse.
What a goal.
Let's go to the replay.
I mean, what am I supposed to say to Stella when she finally asks? "Actually, sweetie, your dad DID come back.
"And guess what - we pretended you didn't exist.
" You need a bigger mound.
What? When it decomposes, the whole thing's going to stink.
I know Tom's the legal guardian.
Liam's the natural birth father.
You're the one with the most to lose.
I don't want to see you getting hurt in all this.
He is her father.
I'm raising his child.
I want to at least get a look at the guy.
Do you know where to find him? Oh, it's him.
Wow.
He doesn't look like Stella.
And that's what Tom's holding onto.
Maree was pretty sure it was him, but not 100%.
Well, what does it say on the birth certificate? Father unknown.
You don't keep a secret like that.
Maybe Tom just didn't know how to tell you.
I had a right to know.
So does he.
So does Stella, if he's the father.
There's a way to know for sure, if you really want to.
Do you want to know? Leave it to me.
- Wait.
What are you doing? - Abi! Ow! What the hell? You had something.
Looked like bird poo.
It's time to go.
Kane.
It's not bedtime yet, is it? Wasn't planning on sleeping.
Oh! Where are the boys? They grew up and left home.
Oh! Whoa! I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down.
Oh! Weren't you guys watching a DVD? Alright, come on.
Come on.
All wolves and piggies need to brush their teeth.
Let's go.
Come on.
Yay! Where were we? Not now.
Why? Fix the door and you might get lucky.
Whoo! OK, where are you? Do you want me to ring the truck? It's all booked.
Well, what about packing? You're going to need a hand with that.
Since when do you go through my mum's stuff? Well, I don't, but there just seems to be so much stuff.
Well, Lucy's coming.
We've got it covered.
Lucy? Why is she going? Because she needs a couch.
What for? Lucy, what do you need a couch for? To sit on.
Dad, I'm moving out.
What? When? Next Saturday.
But how can you afford that? Well, she's got a flatmate.
Who? Mr Tuck.
What - Tilly's teacher? Is that legal? Dad, don't start.
Well, it's a conflict, isn't it? What conflict? A parent teacher client confidentiality.
Don't listen to him.
He's being ridiculous.
So, first, Phoebe tries moving out.
Now you.
Tilly got any plans to go? Dad, I'm 24 and I'm moving around the corner.
Can I have this? Yes.
No.
What is it? It's an olive pitter.
Get over it, darl.
All your daughters are going to leave home one day.
Give me a goodbye kiss.
Focus on the mushroom.
She doesn't want to go as Alice.
She will when she gets to see how awesome the mushroom she carries is.
Yep? Yeah, I'll be right there.
Yeah, it's not closing - not all the way.
Is the tongue of the lock setting in the strike plate? The metal bit that sticks out of the lock, does that fit into the hole in the doorframe? No.
Oh, well, it's probably the hinges.
Although, with an old place like this, could be the frame.
Hey, uh what's with the tool belt? You asked for my help.
No, I asked for your advice.
Oh you took it off? Mmm.
Well, if the tongue's missing the strike plate, it's much easier to fix when it's on.
So I just put it back on.
You wanted my advice.
I advise you to let me fix it.
Nuh, I've got this.
All good.
Swinging a door can be tricky by yourself if you haven't done it before.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Lewis! Hey! Cool tool belt.
What does that fix? That fixes just about everything, son.
I want a tool belt.
Dad, can I have a tool belt? No, you can't.
I want to be a builder.
I want to be a builder too.
Hey, boys, where are your bags? You're gonna have to wedge that up from underneath.
Yeah, I know that, mate.
That's what I'm trying to do.
I'm just, uh just trying to put it into position, that's all.
Are you boys almost done? I've got some wedges in the car.
I told you, mate, I've got this.
I want to fix my own door OK? Well, you asked me to come over.
Give me a call when you want it fixed.
Unless I fix it first.
And remember, a sixpack sweetens a second call-out.
Oh, yeah, whatever.
Well, that was interesting.
He always wants to be the man.
Imagine.
Ow.
Right.
So, you grew up here? Mmm.
Look at you in an Easter bonnet.
That was a long time ago.
Are you sure that your mum won't mind me taking her stuff? She wants you to have it.
She's going all minimalist in the new place - to match her marital status.
Did you hear that? I didn't hear anything.
Your dad? No, he's on a beach in Tonga.
What are you going to do - clean them? Ha! Oh! Oh, Gemma, bloody hell! Damo! Lucy this is Damo.
His mother is having sex with my father.
Almost makes us siblings.
Oh, it really does not.
We were neighbours.
Yeah, many years ago.
What are you doing - breaking into my parents' house? Ah, actually, no, I'm, um I'm moving my mum in.
What? Yes.
Uh-huh.
Oh, hey, I better call you back.
Hey.
Thought you'd be at work.
Took a later shift.
I wanted to talk.
That's a lot of foil.
Yeah, well, it's a gumnut for Cuddlepie.
Does it look like a gumnut? Yeah, sure.
A space-agey one.
Well, I'm going to paint it.
I I don't know.
I just wanted to help.
I mean, you always end up with this kind of stuff, and I I should have told you about Liam.
And I shouldn't have been such a hard-arse about it.
It scares me.
And I know I shut down all conversation.
That wasn't fair.
I will tell you about Liam.
I mean, any questions that you have that I can answer, I will.
Well, let's just leave it for now.
OK.
You know I won't lie to you again.
So, Damo, you grew up next door to Gemma? Yeah.
Yeah, we were good mates when we were kids.
She was always pretty scary, though.
In a good way.
Hey, um your dad Yeah, well, he's not really big on things like communication.
So, when did you mum decide she'd move in? I don't know.
I think it was a mutually agreed thing.
I'm just doing what I'm told.
And it's between them, Gemma, not us.
Ow! Hey.
Surprise, surprise.
Look who it is.
Uh mate, I was just thinking How's the door? Back on and swinging? Yeah, good.
Yeah, really good, actually.
It's a little bit fiddly.
Right.
Yeah.
You've come to pick up the door wedges, haven't you? No, I haven't actually.
I've, uh I've come to, uh to borrow a plane.
What do you want a plane for? Yeah, a plane, just to fix the door.
And some chisels.
Yeah, I need some chisels.
You got any chisels? Oh, yeah, I've got chisels.
Oi, why aren't you at TAFE? It's just one class.
Another one.
You missed two last week.
Don't be such a dad.
Phoebe, you're a smart girl.
Don't be dumb.
TAFE mightn't seem like it means much right now, but Justin, tell her.
You've got to put in every day to get results, right? Yeah every bit counts.
I can't believe Dad doesn't trust me.
Oh, don't mention it.
Giving you a lift was no probs at all.
Hey, Phoebe.
Missed you at physics last week.
I Whose baby? His yeah.
She was just, um she was just helping out.
Thanks heaps for that.
Hey look at this.
What have we got here? Can I help you with anything? Oh, no, I was just entertaining the kids.
Thanks.
It is you.
You're that footy player, right? Marnie McNicol.
I'm the education officer here.
Nice to meet you.
Are you still playing football? No.
Coaching, then? So, what are you doing these days? Oh, just being you know.
Oh, yeah, from footy legend to superdad.
Yeah, something like that.
Well, if you see any courses Sorry.
I shouldn't have done that.
I just Thanks.
There you go.
OK, well Have fun.
See ya.
What do you think? Do you want to take the other end of this one with me? Oh, that's not my mum's couch.
That's my mum's couch.
There's a matching ottoman somewhere.
Oh.
Well, here we go.
You can't take that.
Lucy came here for a couch, and that's exactly what she's gonna get, OK? Come on, Luce.
Your mum said she didn't want her stuff.
Oh, so when something's just old, you just chuck it away and get a new one, is that right? Come on, Lucy, lift this You're not taking Mum's couch.
Oh, I most certainly am.
Not gonna happen.
Oh! Get off.
No.
Damo Gemma you do whatever you have to do.
I'm telling you right now, my arse ain't moving.
You know, I don't think I need a couch.
Beanbags are better.
Great.
What? I might try and catch my three o'clock tute.
To uni? Yeah.
Catch a tram.
Trams don't come up this far, darling.
A bus.
Public transport, yay.
Bye.
I'm taking this couch.
Not in my lifetime.
So? Paternity results.
Have you looked at it? No.
You don't have to open it.
You could burn it.
Once you know what's inside, you can't unknow it.
Well, at least now we know for sure.
You stole his DNA? Is that legal? Well, Abi did.
Well, then, it's probably not legal.
Why would you do that? If there was doubt, you didn't need to tell him anything.
So you're saying now that I know he's the father, I should tell him the truth? No, I'm saying it's between you and Tom.
Leave me out of it.
What did Tom say? Oh oh, you haven't told him.
Shh, just keep your voices down, OK? He's coming.
What - he's here? What? Are you nuts? Why did you bring us? I just wanted to see what you guys thought of him, OK? Just shh.
- Hey, boys.
- Hey.
Have you ordered? Uh, no.
No, we haven't done anything.
We haven't done anything.
No, nothing.
Right.
Cool.
OK.
So, what'll it be? OK, I'll have the barramundi and the chips and an OJ.
And you have a daughter.
Water - if we could water.
We'll have some water.
Sorry, what was that? Oh, nothing.
He said something about a daughter.
No, he didn't.
Look, I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have told you this way.
Yeah, I think you've got the wrong guy.
I'll grab someone else.
Uh, yeah, look, no Do you remember Maree Maree Parker? Uh, yeah, I do.
She died.
Yeah.
Well, before that, she had a kid with you.
You just didn't know about it.
We should probably get a wriggle on.
Her name's Stella.
We'll get takeaway.
She's six years old.
She's beautiful.
So, who the hell are you? What? Well, I'm uh I'm Stella's dad.
Well, one of them.
So are you.
Does she look like me? Does she? Well, Stella's about this high.
She's got a big grin, perpetually messy hair.
She likes to talk a lot.
We had a kid together.
I loved Maree, whatever you might think.
Really? Well, Maree thought you wouldn't want to even be involved.
It wasn't up to her, it's my kid.
She had no right to keep this from me.
You left her.
I didn't know she was pregnant.
OK, I don't have any money, if that's what you want.
We don't want anything from you.
We just thought that you should know.
Maybe when Stella's a bit older When can I meet her? I promised Maree that I would protect Stella from him, and you have just wrecked that.
You don't know what he did to her.
Well, no, I don't.
Because you've never told me.
OK, well, she supported him while he screwed around and he lied, he stole from her.
He just completely messed with her head.
He's not seeing Stella.
Ever.
Well, is that for you to decide? No matter what he's done in the past? Well, it's not for you to decide, because she's my niece, my adopted daughter, not yours.
She's just as much my kid as she is yours.
Yeah, OK, only if we're together.
What's that supposed to mean? I have to get to work.
I, uh spoke to Mum about the couch.
She didn't chuck the other one.
So I could probably pick it up for, um uh Lucy.
Lucy, yeah.
Ta.
Hey.
Your old man still brews.
Mmm.
I remember when you used to sell this stuff to all the kids on our street.
That's how I paid to have my ears pierced.
It was lethal.
Well, we were 16.
Oh, look at that.
Eh? What do you reckon? For old times' sake.
Eh? Come on, you can still hate me and have a beer with me.
Whoo! Awesome.
Oh, I tell you what, though, no wonder we always ended up chucking our guts up down at the skate park.
Oh, not me.
I always saved mine for the bus shelter.
Which I felt was much more classy.
Yes.
Wasn't it, though? A bit like our parents, eh? All class there.
Mmm.
Hey, you know, they were probably at it while we were running under the sprinklers.
Happy families.
Mmm! That's gotta be worth a drink.
Mmm! You are kidding me.
What? Remember these? No way.
Yeah! Ah! Oh! Oh, I got a bit of air! Oh, yeah, you're such a man.
Come on! Oh! He's Ooh! Eh? Nicole Kidman'BMX Bandits'.
Boom! Oh! Unreal, banana peel.
Do you know what? It needs to be higher.
What? Higher.
Seriously? Not too heavy for you? Very funny.
You alright? Yeah.
Hey, Gemma, that's that's pretty high.
Are you sure about this? Since when did you become such a girl? Thanks very much.
Go on, on your bike.
Oh, it's on.
You don't have to do it, you know? Get out of the way.
Oh! Oh! Gemma! You can apply a bit more pressure than that.
It's OK, I'm not gonna break.
This much I already know about you.
Ow.
What is going on? Oh, thanks for coming, baby.
I was gonna drive myself to the hospital but I'm a little Are you drunk? I'm a bit refreshed.
This is Damo.
This is Lewis.
He's he's practically family.
Uh nice to meet you, Lewis.
They're moving in together - Suzy and Dan - setting up a little love nest.
Isn't that cosy? Yeah.
Time to go.
Up you get.
Oh, can you get my stuff from my bedroom, please, baby? Yeah, alright.
I'll be back in a tick.
Try not to fall off anything else while I'm gone.
Are we in trouble? His bite is so much worse than his bark.
Uh That's not right, is it? No.
You're lovely.
You're drunk.
Oh.
You're grumpy.
What's to be grumpy about? My wife stacks her BMX with some other bloke.
Blame the home-brew.
Come on, Gemma, out with it.
What? I know you.
I know this this not talking, drinking, acting like a dickhead that's what I do.
You and me, we are pods in a pea.
So, you done now? You're done with the dumb stuff? Maybe.
Where is it? What? My phone.
I need it now.
What's the big deal? I'm just, uh I'm expecting a call, that's all.
From? There's this carpentry pre-apprenticeship course at TAFE.
And? And, uh I applied.
You what? Yeah, I know, it's, uh it's kinda nuts, but I fixed the door.
You know, I could have got Lewis to do it, but I wanted to do it.
Yeah, I just feel like all my life, all I've known how to do is kick a piece of leather round a park.
But now it's You don't need to explain, I get it.
Really? Yeah, I think it's awesome.
OK, well, if I get in, just make sure you don't tell Lewis, OK? OK.
One story, then bed.
Deal? Deal.
What? 'The Story of Us' again? What about the one with the troll and the fairy floss? I like that one.
Alright? Alright.
"Once upon a time "there was a beautiful baby princess called Stella.
" Look at my nose, it's like a sultana.
I'll get it.
"One day something very sad happened to her mummy, the Queen.
"She got sick.
" Like Frieda got sick? Who's Frieda? Our pet possum.
Well, Frieda wasn't our pet, she just lived in our roof.
But, still, she went to heaven, like Mummy.
Yeah, like Mummy.
So, um So then I came to live with you and Dad.
"So baby Princess Stella came to live with her Uncle Tom "and his charming Prince Kane.
"Never in their wildest dreams did they think they'd be lucky enough" To have me.
Yeah, you.
Amazing, squishable ooh, stinky you.
Why tell me I have a daughter if you don't want me to see her? If I had it my way, mate, you wouldn't even know about her.
What's going on? Your boyfriend won't let me see my daughter.
You know, if this ever went to court, I'd be called her father, not either of you two.
Sorry? What? Why would it ever go to court? You blokes have treated me pretty badly.
I spoke to a lawyer.
Why? I got rights, they're worth something.
In what way? Well, you tell me.
Are you talking about trying for custody? Maybe we can work something out before it gets to that.
No, he's talking about blackmail.
Are you? Well, you wanted him here.
This is how he rolls.
You've always had an issue with me, mate.
But you've got no idea.
I've got problems, I've got bad debts.
Now, you want me gone, that's fine.
A few grand here or there, everyone wins.
And we won't see you again.
Is that a promise? Because if I do pay this and you come back, I swear to you No.
Stay out of it, Kane.
No, I won't stay out of it.
If you wanna see Stella, that's fine, we'll figure something out, but blackmail? What kind of a father are you? At least I'm her dad.
Oh, OK, you're blood.
You're both blood.
Blood only goes so far.
I'm the only one acting like a father here, the only one thinking about Stella.
You go see your lawyer, Stella doesn't have a price.
Dad? What's going on? Nothing.
Who was that? No-one.
Come on, I'll tuck you in.
What were you doing? You just shut the door on him.
I was handling that, fixing it.
I mean By buying Stella? What is wrong with you? What are you still doing up? I'm making wings.
Now? She's going as a fairy.
I don't even know why I wanted her to go as Alice anyway.
I think you just want your kids to have all the good stuff that you had growing up, you know? Turns out there wasn't much good stuff for me.
What your dad did doesn't change your happy memories.
Found this down a rabbit hole.
'Alice in Wonderland'.
You beautiful man.
I read this every night, for about five years.
It's still precious.
All of it.
That won't change.
Stella? Stell? Stella? Is she with you? What's wrong? No.
Stella! Stella! Stell.
What are you doing, darling? It's freezing.
Come inside.
I think Frieda's still here.
I can see the box.
Is possum heaven the same as people heaven? Uh, I think so.
Then why isn't Frieda with Mum now? Frieda might be with your mum.
Well, because only your soul moves on after you die.
Yeah, that's right, your body stays here.
What's a soul? It's kind of like your essence.
What's essence? Well, it's like cordial and SodaStream.
Can I have a SodaStream for breakfast? No.
Now back inside.
You know, one day these questions are going to be about her dad.
Did you mean it, yesterday? On the pier, it sounded like you wanted to split.
I was angry.
Maybe you were right.
About splitting.
I can't go on doing this if you just see me as some guy who feeds your kid and puts her to bed.
Check, one, two.
How you goin', mate, alright? I see Stella's come as Cuddlepie.
Yep.
From 'The Faraway Tree', isn't it? 'Snugglepot and Cuddlepie'.
You and Tom sorted things out? You look like hell.
Where's Dad? Oh, he'll be here any minute, I'm sure.
Off you run.
Welcome.
Welcome, everyone, to our bigger, brighter, bookier Book Parade.
Yeah.
And first, we have Harry Potter.
Yeah, there we go.
And and another Harry Potter.
And who would have thought it? Surprise, surprise, another Harry Potter.
Fantastic, great.
Hey.
If you haven't scored one yet, my mate said we can have his couch.
Huge relief, believe me.
Oh, really? You having hassles? I swear, parents get crazier the older they get.
Speaking of.
Yeah.
I gotta fix this.
And we have the Queen of Hearts.
A genie.
We've got a genie.
Very nice.
And we have a Native American Indian.
Thank you very much, Chief.
I know that you think that I shouldn't move out.
You think that I've chosen the wrong housemate, that I'm too young.
Too inexperienced, too immature, too messy, too broke.
I don't think that at all.
Well, maybe the bit about the housemate.
And, oh, we've got Little Red Riding Hood.
I'm just You know, I guess Dad.
I'm going to miss you too, you dag.
There she goes, scampering through the forest.
Great work, Riding Hood.
And now we have a pig being chased by a wolf.
Don't know where the other two little pigs are, but Hey, how's the door? Fixed.
So, where's the master carpenter? Oh, he's busy.
Making his way into Sherwood Forest, the little green socialist.
So, what do you know about this Pythagoras dude? Not much.
And now we have, um oh a gang of fairies.
A flock of fairies.
A pod of fairies? A sleeper cell of fairies? Why is she carrying a mushroom? Because fairies live under mushrooms, don't they? It took me six hours to make the bloody thing.
And now we have Mrs Saucepan.
Fantastic.
All sorts of kitchen implements.
I'm so sorry I'm late.
Here she comes.
And now we have Stella.
Where's her costume? Uh as, um as Stella from 'The Story of Us'.
I'm not sure if this is a statement on the mask and how the individual often masks their own identity or if it's just a wardrobe malfunction.
I'll get onto that with Stella.
Here.
What did you bring that for? There's a new chapter.
Go on, have a read.
What's this? I've filed to have you as Stella's adoptive coparent.
Is that even possible? Aren't there laws against that? I don't care.
I want you on that form.
Even if we have to move interstate to make it happen.
You are way more than just the guy who feeds Stella and puts her to bed.
You're my amazing partner.
You are her dad.
Well, we still need to deal with Liam.
Hey.
You got a sec? Um no.
No, I'm gonna head north for a while.
Well, what about Stella? We thought you could meet her properly.
Yeah.
Look, you guys dumped this on me at a really bad time.
She looks like your sister.
Lucky kid.
Will you let us know where you end up? Yeah, sure.
How could he not wanna be part of her life? Come on.
"Alice was beginning to get very tired "of sitting by her sister on the bank and of having nothing to do, "when suddenly a white rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.
"Burning with curiosity, she ran across the field after it.
"And it was just in time to see it pop down a large rabbit hole "under the hedge.
"In another moment she went after it "without any thought whatsoever of how in the world she would get out.
"
Seems he's bonking another woman.
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Justin, it's a mess.
Hey, sometimes, you know, you have to see things in terms of potential.
Do we really have to live here? Are you open to the idea of sharing? We could get a room.
A I mean, a flat Oh.
With rooms with many rooms that we would share.
Yeah.
Stella's biological dad's back.
Don't know, Tommy.
There's going to be some big changes.
Let it go.
Nothing has changed.
EVERYTHING'S changed.
Liam doesn't know that Stella's his daughter, and we don't have to tell him.
Everything stays exactly as it is.
OK, well, what about Stella? If her biological father is back in town, doesn't she have a right to meet him? Do you want to keep your voice down? If you're so keen to keep things the way they are, then why the big secret meeting with Liam? Can you smell something bad? Don't change the subject.
I thought we'd gone over this.
I bumped into him, organised one cup of coffee - that's it.
He has a right to know that Maree died.
But not that she had his baby? Maree didn't want him to know.
And she was my sister.
All along you said that you had no idea who the father was.
Well, I don't know that Liam is the father.
Not for sure.
So now you're just going to sweep it all under the carpet? OK, there's definitely something bad in here somewhere.
Tom, we need to talk about this.
Gumnuts! Great, sweetie.
Come in.
Hello! We brought kebabs and gourmet Oh, jeez! Eugh! Sausages.
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to bid farewell to Frieda.
We didn't know Frieda long, but she made a big impact.
We hope that she is at peace, surrounded by eucalyptus trees, at one with her marsupial mates.
A doll's gone in with Frieda because Frieda needs someone to talk to.
Of course she does.
And a half-drunk bottle of juice in case Frieda gets thirsty.
And now a musical tribute.
Just one verse, girls.
Just one verse.
What a goal.
Let's go to the replay.
I mean, what am I supposed to say to Stella when she finally asks? "Actually, sweetie, your dad DID come back.
"And guess what - we pretended you didn't exist.
" You need a bigger mound.
What? When it decomposes, the whole thing's going to stink.
I know Tom's the legal guardian.
Liam's the natural birth father.
You're the one with the most to lose.
I don't want to see you getting hurt in all this.
He is her father.
I'm raising his child.
I want to at least get a look at the guy.
Do you know where to find him? Oh, it's him.
Wow.
He doesn't look like Stella.
And that's what Tom's holding onto.
Maree was pretty sure it was him, but not 100%.
Well, what does it say on the birth certificate? Father unknown.
You don't keep a secret like that.
Maybe Tom just didn't know how to tell you.
I had a right to know.
So does he.
So does Stella, if he's the father.
There's a way to know for sure, if you really want to.
Do you want to know? Leave it to me.
- Wait.
What are you doing? - Abi! Ow! What the hell? You had something.
Looked like bird poo.
It's time to go.
Kane.
It's not bedtime yet, is it? Wasn't planning on sleeping.
Oh! Where are the boys? They grew up and left home.
Oh! Whoa! I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down.
Oh! Weren't you guys watching a DVD? Alright, come on.
Come on.
All wolves and piggies need to brush their teeth.
Let's go.
Come on.
Yay! Where were we? Not now.
Why? Fix the door and you might get lucky.
Whoo! OK, where are you? Do you want me to ring the truck? It's all booked.
Well, what about packing? You're going to need a hand with that.
Since when do you go through my mum's stuff? Well, I don't, but there just seems to be so much stuff.
Well, Lucy's coming.
We've got it covered.
Lucy? Why is she going? Because she needs a couch.
What for? Lucy, what do you need a couch for? To sit on.
Dad, I'm moving out.
What? When? Next Saturday.
But how can you afford that? Well, she's got a flatmate.
Who? Mr Tuck.
What - Tilly's teacher? Is that legal? Dad, don't start.
Well, it's a conflict, isn't it? What conflict? A parent teacher client confidentiality.
Don't listen to him.
He's being ridiculous.
So, first, Phoebe tries moving out.
Now you.
Tilly got any plans to go? Dad, I'm 24 and I'm moving around the corner.
Can I have this? Yes.
No.
What is it? It's an olive pitter.
Get over it, darl.
All your daughters are going to leave home one day.
Give me a goodbye kiss.
Focus on the mushroom.
She doesn't want to go as Alice.
She will when she gets to see how awesome the mushroom she carries is.
Yep? Yeah, I'll be right there.
Yeah, it's not closing - not all the way.
Is the tongue of the lock setting in the strike plate? The metal bit that sticks out of the lock, does that fit into the hole in the doorframe? No.
Oh, well, it's probably the hinges.
Although, with an old place like this, could be the frame.
Hey, uh what's with the tool belt? You asked for my help.
No, I asked for your advice.
Oh you took it off? Mmm.
Well, if the tongue's missing the strike plate, it's much easier to fix when it's on.
So I just put it back on.
You wanted my advice.
I advise you to let me fix it.
Nuh, I've got this.
All good.
Swinging a door can be tricky by yourself if you haven't done it before.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Lewis! Hey! Cool tool belt.
What does that fix? That fixes just about everything, son.
I want a tool belt.
Dad, can I have a tool belt? No, you can't.
I want to be a builder.
I want to be a builder too.
Hey, boys, where are your bags? You're gonna have to wedge that up from underneath.
Yeah, I know that, mate.
That's what I'm trying to do.
I'm just, uh just trying to put it into position, that's all.
Are you boys almost done? I've got some wedges in the car.
I told you, mate, I've got this.
I want to fix my own door OK? Well, you asked me to come over.
Give me a call when you want it fixed.
Unless I fix it first.
And remember, a sixpack sweetens a second call-out.
Oh, yeah, whatever.
Well, that was interesting.
He always wants to be the man.
Imagine.
Ow.
Right.
So, you grew up here? Mmm.
Look at you in an Easter bonnet.
That was a long time ago.
Are you sure that your mum won't mind me taking her stuff? She wants you to have it.
She's going all minimalist in the new place - to match her marital status.
Did you hear that? I didn't hear anything.
Your dad? No, he's on a beach in Tonga.
What are you going to do - clean them? Ha! Oh! Oh, Gemma, bloody hell! Damo! Lucy this is Damo.
His mother is having sex with my father.
Almost makes us siblings.
Oh, it really does not.
We were neighbours.
Yeah, many years ago.
What are you doing - breaking into my parents' house? Ah, actually, no, I'm, um I'm moving my mum in.
What? Yes.
Uh-huh.
Oh, hey, I better call you back.
Hey.
Thought you'd be at work.
Took a later shift.
I wanted to talk.
That's a lot of foil.
Yeah, well, it's a gumnut for Cuddlepie.
Does it look like a gumnut? Yeah, sure.
A space-agey one.
Well, I'm going to paint it.
I I don't know.
I just wanted to help.
I mean, you always end up with this kind of stuff, and I I should have told you about Liam.
And I shouldn't have been such a hard-arse about it.
It scares me.
And I know I shut down all conversation.
That wasn't fair.
I will tell you about Liam.
I mean, any questions that you have that I can answer, I will.
Well, let's just leave it for now.
OK.
You know I won't lie to you again.
So, Damo, you grew up next door to Gemma? Yeah.
Yeah, we were good mates when we were kids.
She was always pretty scary, though.
In a good way.
Hey, um your dad Yeah, well, he's not really big on things like communication.
So, when did you mum decide she'd move in? I don't know.
I think it was a mutually agreed thing.
I'm just doing what I'm told.
And it's between them, Gemma, not us.
Ow! Hey.
Surprise, surprise.
Look who it is.
Uh mate, I was just thinking How's the door? Back on and swinging? Yeah, good.
Yeah, really good, actually.
It's a little bit fiddly.
Right.
Yeah.
You've come to pick up the door wedges, haven't you? No, I haven't actually.
I've, uh I've come to, uh to borrow a plane.
What do you want a plane for? Yeah, a plane, just to fix the door.
And some chisels.
Yeah, I need some chisels.
You got any chisels? Oh, yeah, I've got chisels.
Oi, why aren't you at TAFE? It's just one class.
Another one.
You missed two last week.
Don't be such a dad.
Phoebe, you're a smart girl.
Don't be dumb.
TAFE mightn't seem like it means much right now, but Justin, tell her.
You've got to put in every day to get results, right? Yeah every bit counts.
I can't believe Dad doesn't trust me.
Oh, don't mention it.
Giving you a lift was no probs at all.
Hey, Phoebe.
Missed you at physics last week.
I Whose baby? His yeah.
She was just, um she was just helping out.
Thanks heaps for that.
Hey look at this.
What have we got here? Can I help you with anything? Oh, no, I was just entertaining the kids.
Thanks.
It is you.
You're that footy player, right? Marnie McNicol.
I'm the education officer here.
Nice to meet you.
Are you still playing football? No.
Coaching, then? So, what are you doing these days? Oh, just being you know.
Oh, yeah, from footy legend to superdad.
Yeah, something like that.
Well, if you see any courses Sorry.
I shouldn't have done that.
I just Thanks.
There you go.
OK, well Have fun.
See ya.
What do you think? Do you want to take the other end of this one with me? Oh, that's not my mum's couch.
That's my mum's couch.
There's a matching ottoman somewhere.
Oh.
Well, here we go.
You can't take that.
Lucy came here for a couch, and that's exactly what she's gonna get, OK? Come on, Luce.
Your mum said she didn't want her stuff.
Oh, so when something's just old, you just chuck it away and get a new one, is that right? Come on, Lucy, lift this You're not taking Mum's couch.
Oh, I most certainly am.
Not gonna happen.
Oh! Get off.
No.
Damo Gemma you do whatever you have to do.
I'm telling you right now, my arse ain't moving.
You know, I don't think I need a couch.
Beanbags are better.
Great.
What? I might try and catch my three o'clock tute.
To uni? Yeah.
Catch a tram.
Trams don't come up this far, darling.
A bus.
Public transport, yay.
Bye.
I'm taking this couch.
Not in my lifetime.
So? Paternity results.
Have you looked at it? No.
You don't have to open it.
You could burn it.
Once you know what's inside, you can't unknow it.
Well, at least now we know for sure.
You stole his DNA? Is that legal? Well, Abi did.
Well, then, it's probably not legal.
Why would you do that? If there was doubt, you didn't need to tell him anything.
So you're saying now that I know he's the father, I should tell him the truth? No, I'm saying it's between you and Tom.
Leave me out of it.
What did Tom say? Oh oh, you haven't told him.
Shh, just keep your voices down, OK? He's coming.
What - he's here? What? Are you nuts? Why did you bring us? I just wanted to see what you guys thought of him, OK? Just shh.
- Hey, boys.
- Hey.
Have you ordered? Uh, no.
No, we haven't done anything.
We haven't done anything.
No, nothing.
Right.
Cool.
OK.
So, what'll it be? OK, I'll have the barramundi and the chips and an OJ.
And you have a daughter.
Water - if we could water.
We'll have some water.
Sorry, what was that? Oh, nothing.
He said something about a daughter.
No, he didn't.
Look, I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have told you this way.
Yeah, I think you've got the wrong guy.
I'll grab someone else.
Uh, yeah, look, no Do you remember Maree Maree Parker? Uh, yeah, I do.
She died.
Yeah.
Well, before that, she had a kid with you.
You just didn't know about it.
We should probably get a wriggle on.
Her name's Stella.
We'll get takeaway.
She's six years old.
She's beautiful.
So, who the hell are you? What? Well, I'm uh I'm Stella's dad.
Well, one of them.
So are you.
Does she look like me? Does she? Well, Stella's about this high.
She's got a big grin, perpetually messy hair.
She likes to talk a lot.
We had a kid together.
I loved Maree, whatever you might think.
Really? Well, Maree thought you wouldn't want to even be involved.
It wasn't up to her, it's my kid.
She had no right to keep this from me.
You left her.
I didn't know she was pregnant.
OK, I don't have any money, if that's what you want.
We don't want anything from you.
We just thought that you should know.
Maybe when Stella's a bit older When can I meet her? I promised Maree that I would protect Stella from him, and you have just wrecked that.
You don't know what he did to her.
Well, no, I don't.
Because you've never told me.
OK, well, she supported him while he screwed around and he lied, he stole from her.
He just completely messed with her head.
He's not seeing Stella.
Ever.
Well, is that for you to decide? No matter what he's done in the past? Well, it's not for you to decide, because she's my niece, my adopted daughter, not yours.
She's just as much my kid as she is yours.
Yeah, OK, only if we're together.
What's that supposed to mean? I have to get to work.
I, uh spoke to Mum about the couch.
She didn't chuck the other one.
So I could probably pick it up for, um uh Lucy.
Lucy, yeah.
Ta.
Hey.
Your old man still brews.
Mmm.
I remember when you used to sell this stuff to all the kids on our street.
That's how I paid to have my ears pierced.
It was lethal.
Well, we were 16.
Oh, look at that.
Eh? What do you reckon? For old times' sake.
Eh? Come on, you can still hate me and have a beer with me.
Whoo! Awesome.
Oh, I tell you what, though, no wonder we always ended up chucking our guts up down at the skate park.
Oh, not me.
I always saved mine for the bus shelter.
Which I felt was much more classy.
Yes.
Wasn't it, though? A bit like our parents, eh? All class there.
Mmm.
Hey, you know, they were probably at it while we were running under the sprinklers.
Happy families.
Mmm! That's gotta be worth a drink.
Mmm! You are kidding me.
What? Remember these? No way.
Yeah! Ah! Oh! Oh, I got a bit of air! Oh, yeah, you're such a man.
Come on! Oh! He's Ooh! Eh? Nicole Kidman'BMX Bandits'.
Boom! Oh! Unreal, banana peel.
Do you know what? It needs to be higher.
What? Higher.
Seriously? Not too heavy for you? Very funny.
You alright? Yeah.
Hey, Gemma, that's that's pretty high.
Are you sure about this? Since when did you become such a girl? Thanks very much.
Go on, on your bike.
Oh, it's on.
You don't have to do it, you know? Get out of the way.
Oh! Oh! Gemma! You can apply a bit more pressure than that.
It's OK, I'm not gonna break.
This much I already know about you.
Ow.
What is going on? Oh, thanks for coming, baby.
I was gonna drive myself to the hospital but I'm a little Are you drunk? I'm a bit refreshed.
This is Damo.
This is Lewis.
He's he's practically family.
Uh nice to meet you, Lewis.
They're moving in together - Suzy and Dan - setting up a little love nest.
Isn't that cosy? Yeah.
Time to go.
Up you get.
Oh, can you get my stuff from my bedroom, please, baby? Yeah, alright.
I'll be back in a tick.
Try not to fall off anything else while I'm gone.
Are we in trouble? His bite is so much worse than his bark.
Uh That's not right, is it? No.
You're lovely.
You're drunk.
Oh.
You're grumpy.
What's to be grumpy about? My wife stacks her BMX with some other bloke.
Blame the home-brew.
Come on, Gemma, out with it.
What? I know you.
I know this this not talking, drinking, acting like a dickhead that's what I do.
You and me, we are pods in a pea.
So, you done now? You're done with the dumb stuff? Maybe.
Where is it? What? My phone.
I need it now.
What's the big deal? I'm just, uh I'm expecting a call, that's all.
From? There's this carpentry pre-apprenticeship course at TAFE.
And? And, uh I applied.
You what? Yeah, I know, it's, uh it's kinda nuts, but I fixed the door.
You know, I could have got Lewis to do it, but I wanted to do it.
Yeah, I just feel like all my life, all I've known how to do is kick a piece of leather round a park.
But now it's You don't need to explain, I get it.
Really? Yeah, I think it's awesome.
OK, well, if I get in, just make sure you don't tell Lewis, OK? OK.
One story, then bed.
Deal? Deal.
What? 'The Story of Us' again? What about the one with the troll and the fairy floss? I like that one.
Alright? Alright.
"Once upon a time "there was a beautiful baby princess called Stella.
" Look at my nose, it's like a sultana.
I'll get it.
"One day something very sad happened to her mummy, the Queen.
"She got sick.
" Like Frieda got sick? Who's Frieda? Our pet possum.
Well, Frieda wasn't our pet, she just lived in our roof.
But, still, she went to heaven, like Mummy.
Yeah, like Mummy.
So, um So then I came to live with you and Dad.
"So baby Princess Stella came to live with her Uncle Tom "and his charming Prince Kane.
"Never in their wildest dreams did they think they'd be lucky enough" To have me.
Yeah, you.
Amazing, squishable ooh, stinky you.
Why tell me I have a daughter if you don't want me to see her? If I had it my way, mate, you wouldn't even know about her.
What's going on? Your boyfriend won't let me see my daughter.
You know, if this ever went to court, I'd be called her father, not either of you two.
Sorry? What? Why would it ever go to court? You blokes have treated me pretty badly.
I spoke to a lawyer.
Why? I got rights, they're worth something.
In what way? Well, you tell me.
Are you talking about trying for custody? Maybe we can work something out before it gets to that.
No, he's talking about blackmail.
Are you? Well, you wanted him here.
This is how he rolls.
You've always had an issue with me, mate.
But you've got no idea.
I've got problems, I've got bad debts.
Now, you want me gone, that's fine.
A few grand here or there, everyone wins.
And we won't see you again.
Is that a promise? Because if I do pay this and you come back, I swear to you No.
Stay out of it, Kane.
No, I won't stay out of it.
If you wanna see Stella, that's fine, we'll figure something out, but blackmail? What kind of a father are you? At least I'm her dad.
Oh, OK, you're blood.
You're both blood.
Blood only goes so far.
I'm the only one acting like a father here, the only one thinking about Stella.
You go see your lawyer, Stella doesn't have a price.
Dad? What's going on? Nothing.
Who was that? No-one.
Come on, I'll tuck you in.
What were you doing? You just shut the door on him.
I was handling that, fixing it.
I mean By buying Stella? What is wrong with you? What are you still doing up? I'm making wings.
Now? She's going as a fairy.
I don't even know why I wanted her to go as Alice anyway.
I think you just want your kids to have all the good stuff that you had growing up, you know? Turns out there wasn't much good stuff for me.
What your dad did doesn't change your happy memories.
Found this down a rabbit hole.
'Alice in Wonderland'.
You beautiful man.
I read this every night, for about five years.
It's still precious.
All of it.
That won't change.
Stella? Stell? Stella? Is she with you? What's wrong? No.
Stella! Stella! Stell.
What are you doing, darling? It's freezing.
Come inside.
I think Frieda's still here.
I can see the box.
Is possum heaven the same as people heaven? Uh, I think so.
Then why isn't Frieda with Mum now? Frieda might be with your mum.
Well, because only your soul moves on after you die.
Yeah, that's right, your body stays here.
What's a soul? It's kind of like your essence.
What's essence? Well, it's like cordial and SodaStream.
Can I have a SodaStream for breakfast? No.
Now back inside.
You know, one day these questions are going to be about her dad.
Did you mean it, yesterday? On the pier, it sounded like you wanted to split.
I was angry.
Maybe you were right.
About splitting.
I can't go on doing this if you just see me as some guy who feeds your kid and puts her to bed.
Check, one, two.
How you goin', mate, alright? I see Stella's come as Cuddlepie.
Yep.
From 'The Faraway Tree', isn't it? 'Snugglepot and Cuddlepie'.
You and Tom sorted things out? You look like hell.
Where's Dad? Oh, he'll be here any minute, I'm sure.
Off you run.
Welcome.
Welcome, everyone, to our bigger, brighter, bookier Book Parade.
Yeah.
And first, we have Harry Potter.
Yeah, there we go.
And and another Harry Potter.
And who would have thought it? Surprise, surprise, another Harry Potter.
Fantastic, great.
Hey.
If you haven't scored one yet, my mate said we can have his couch.
Huge relief, believe me.
Oh, really? You having hassles? I swear, parents get crazier the older they get.
Speaking of.
Yeah.
I gotta fix this.
And we have the Queen of Hearts.
A genie.
We've got a genie.
Very nice.
And we have a Native American Indian.
Thank you very much, Chief.
I know that you think that I shouldn't move out.
You think that I've chosen the wrong housemate, that I'm too young.
Too inexperienced, too immature, too messy, too broke.
I don't think that at all.
Well, maybe the bit about the housemate.
And, oh, we've got Little Red Riding Hood.
I'm just You know, I guess Dad.
I'm going to miss you too, you dag.
There she goes, scampering through the forest.
Great work, Riding Hood.
And now we have a pig being chased by a wolf.
Don't know where the other two little pigs are, but Hey, how's the door? Fixed.
So, where's the master carpenter? Oh, he's busy.
Making his way into Sherwood Forest, the little green socialist.
So, what do you know about this Pythagoras dude? Not much.
And now we have, um oh a gang of fairies.
A flock of fairies.
A pod of fairies? A sleeper cell of fairies? Why is she carrying a mushroom? Because fairies live under mushrooms, don't they? It took me six hours to make the bloody thing.
And now we have Mrs Saucepan.
Fantastic.
All sorts of kitchen implements.
I'm so sorry I'm late.
Here she comes.
And now we have Stella.
Where's her costume? Uh as, um as Stella from 'The Story of Us'.
I'm not sure if this is a statement on the mask and how the individual often masks their own identity or if it's just a wardrobe malfunction.
I'll get onto that with Stella.
Here.
What did you bring that for? There's a new chapter.
Go on, have a read.
What's this? I've filed to have you as Stella's adoptive coparent.
Is that even possible? Aren't there laws against that? I don't care.
I want you on that form.
Even if we have to move interstate to make it happen.
You are way more than just the guy who feeds Stella and puts her to bed.
You're my amazing partner.
You are her dad.
Well, we still need to deal with Liam.
Hey.
You got a sec? Um no.
No, I'm gonna head north for a while.
Well, what about Stella? We thought you could meet her properly.
Yeah.
Look, you guys dumped this on me at a really bad time.
She looks like your sister.
Lucky kid.
Will you let us know where you end up? Yeah, sure.
How could he not wanna be part of her life? Come on.
"Alice was beginning to get very tired "of sitting by her sister on the bank and of having nothing to do, "when suddenly a white rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.
"Burning with curiosity, she ran across the field after it.
"And it was just in time to see it pop down a large rabbit hole "under the hedge.
"In another moment she went after it "without any thought whatsoever of how in the world she would get out.
"