House Husbands (2012) s05e12 Episode Script

Season 5, Episode 12

1 Did you get the memo about the Da Silva intern exchange? San Diego.
Hotly contested.
- I got the San Diego placement! - (GASPS) No way! - (LAUGHS) - I can't believe it! I would trade you dirty nappies and three years of no sleep in a heartbeat.
Yeah, I don't feel comfortable leaving my kids with people I don't know.
Yeah.
Naturally.
So what can I do to convince you? Are you interested in selling? Haven't really thought about it much.
Well, don't think about it.
Just do it.
The prices you can get around here are life-changing.
Nepean South is closing down.
But that's confidential information so tell no one.
- Did you know about this? - No.
(CHILDREN'S HUBBUB) MAN: Get up! Come on, get off.
WOMAN: Enough! Ollie said everyone hates me.
Because her dad's not doing anything to save our school.
Oh, it's his kingdom.
He can do whatever he wants.
All in the name of Kokoda.
Yeah.
If we get there before they close the school down.
It will be demolished by the end of the year.
- (AUDIENCE GASPS) - Any further questions can be directed to Councillor Crabb who's been involved in this since his first day in office.
You looked me in the eye and you lied.
Well, I'm definitely going to San Diego, and I'm gonna take Tilda with me.
- Well, I'll come too.
- I don't want you to come! I want you to stay here and clean up this mess.
Tilda, let's go.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) You right? Got all your stuff? Don't worry, Dad.
I'm walking to school on my own.
Since when? Since now.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) - (JUICY SPLAT) - (GROANS) Clean that up, Crabb! (HAIRDRYER WHIRRS) So we're at the Post-it note stage now, are we? How long is this gonna last? Tilda won't even let me walk her to school, she's so embarrassed.
CROWD (CHANT): Save our school! Save our school! Council called us a "surplus asset".
To merge us with another school.
They're selling it as a super school.
It's a super swindle, we say.
(CHANTING CONTINUES) You heard it.
The angry parents and friends of Nepean South.
CROWD: Save our school! Save our school! Bye, Mum.
I have to go.
Give us a kiss! ALL CHANT: Give us a kiss! Give us a kiss! CROWD CHANT: Save our school! Save save our school.
Save our school! (UPBEAT MUSIC) (MAN CLAPS HANDS) Okay, everyone.
School anniversary play about to begin.
All right.
One for you.
There you go.
Hey, Tilda.
You ready to join in? I don't wanna do it.
Oh, the show can't go on without you.
Why don't I sit here for awhile then? Okay.
Okay, here's one more for you.
Can you send this to the Minister for us? What is it? It's an invitation for the play.
(READS) "Dear Minister, please come and see our play "and don't close our school.
"We like it here.
From Zac Baynie and Class 5B.
" If he sees how good it is, they won't knock our school down.
That is a really good idea.
It's from all of us.
Right.
I'm gonna make sure he gets it.
Now, we better put on a show.
CHILDREN: Yes! Ready to join the other kids? No.
Councillor Crabb.
I'm not doing your dirty work for you anymore.
It's a collaborative process.
You hung me out to dry.
On a brighter note Here.
Plans for the new merger school.
We're releasing them this afternoon.
This is a reward for our community.
You should see the light.
Get behind it.
Yeah, well, I'll be listening to my constituents on that one.
This is a good news story, Lewis.
If they don't want to hear it, tell them not to come.
Same goes for you.
Oh, sorry! I'm sorry, but - Develop People are here.
- Yes, Sonia.
It's in the diary.
Do we have coffee and sandwiches? Ah, not quite.
You might want to put some chilli on those sandwiches.
I feel like doing it, Councillor.
Call me Lewis.
Hi.
- Hello? - Ah, Nick.
Scott Michaels.
G'day.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I thought I'd met all the parents.
Ah, yeah, I'm part of the team planning the merger - with Nepean North.
- Ah.
We'd like you to apply to head up the music department.
That's great, but I actually just got a new job.
Here.
And a promotion, with better salary.
Look, I'll give you my details.
Yeah? Some broad information.
- Yeah, look, I I - Just have a read.
Have a think about it.
Give me a call.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) Like I said on the phone, it all really depends on the price, you know? Well, I don't think you're going to be disappointed with what I can get for this place.
I was meant to fix that last week, actually, but, ah - It's, ah - It's a fantastic location.
- Lucky for you.
Yeah.
- Lucky for me? Obviously I'd tidy the place up if I was thinking about selling.
Yeah, I wouldn't overdo it.
I think there's a market for places that are a little bit more primitive.
- Primitive? - Yeah.
- (PIECE CLATTERS TO THE FLOOR) - Oh, sorry.
Yeah, I was gonna fix that too.
Let's go down the hall.
People love to renovate.
They want to put their own stamp on things, you know.
Someone is gonna make this really nice.
So, price wise (SIGHS) what are we talking? Special delivery! Don't you ever knock? Oh, sorry.
Hello.
- Hi.
- I'm Alissa.
Oh, ah, Mark Oliver.
You don't happen to have a house in the area I can sell for you too, do you? (CHUCKLES) (LAUGHS) I'll, um, I'll call you later - Alissa.
Thanks.
- Okay.
- Okay.
See ya.
- Okay.
Have fun! Bye.
You're selling up? Hey, what's in the box? You first.
I'm just (SIGHS) trying to be practical for once.
You know, I've been struggling with the mortgage since the day I signed it.
This city's expensive.
You're leaving town? I'm gonna move back to the country, be closer to Mum and Raf.
Fresh air.
The kids are getting older.
They need to get to know their family.
That's just a it's a long way.
Oh, it's a few hours down the road.
Oh! We'll see.
Now, come on.
What's in the box? (SIGHS) (POIGNANT MUSIC) Nepean South Primary to Kokoda.
Ah! (LAUGHS) So looks like Kokoda might be a farewell party.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) (SIGHS) (TRAM BELL PEALS) - Hey.
- Hey.
I was thinking maybe you can use my car while I'm at Kokoda.
Oh, thanks.
Can you drive? - Can I drive? - Hmm.
- (CHUCKLES) - (LAUGHS) We're gonna be fine, Justin.
- Your kids are so sweet.
- Yeah.
Yeah, most of the time.
Although Jacob can be competitive.
- Hmm.
- Zac's a big worrier.
- Angie she's - She's a schemer.
- (BOTH CHUCKLE) - She is.
Well, I was gonna say 'dreamer' but she has been a bit cheeky lately.
Yeah, she has.
She has good taste.
What can I say? Hmm.
Well, your kids aren't gonna be any trouble.
But, ah, you on the other hand.
- Me? Trouble? Please.
- Mm-hmm.
- Never.
- Oh, never! (BOTH LAUGH) Help me with the leaves for the play.
Okay.
(TENSE MUSIC) Dad! What are you doing? I thought you were going to meet me outside of the gate.
Yeah, I was.
But there's a meeting I have to go to.
Go and play with your friends.
What friends? (TENSE MUSIC) And every effort will be made to acknowledge - (CHAIR LEGS SCRAPE) - the history and culture - of Nepean South Primary - (SCRAPING CONTINUES) as it moves to its new home.
Don't mind me.
I thought you decided not to join us, Councillor.
Oh, I wouldn't miss this.
As I was saying, it's been a privilege to work so closely with the department to develop this merger school, which will be renamed Nepean City Education Precinct.
Education precinct? Excuse me.
How are 500 kids from Nepean South supposed to fit into an already jam-packed primary school? That's why the building program's been accelerated.
The new building will be state-of-the-art and more than double the current capacity.
(PEOPLE GASP) (CROWD HUBBUB) You're building a high-rise? We're building a school for the future.
An edu-precinct that will allow us to grow.
Why now? Because Nepean South District's on the decline.
We need to ramp up growth by making our schools more attractive.
You're building over the playground.
No, not exactly.
You've lost half the playground and the oval.
Where are the kids supposed to play? The roof is recreation space.
The roof! Are you kidding? How many kids are gonna fit up there, 30? It's not unusual to have rostered play times.
- (PEOPLE GASP) - WOMAN: Oh my god.
- (CROWD HUBBUB) - Crabb? What the hell are you doing? What I should've been doing in the first place.
Hosing it down! (PEOPLE SCREECH) (FAST-PACED MUSIC) Your performance just marks us all as rabble.
What? I'm gonna go and pick up Tilda.
You'll be resigning from council obviously.
I doubt it.
Let's face it, Lewis, you're not a politician.
You're a clown! Cynthia, I want a meeting with you and the Minister.
After that little performance, you really think I'm gonna let you loose in a meeting with the Minister? Get real, Lewis.
Oh, that backfired.
A lot of ruckus for no reason.
Made matters far worse.
No one's gonna take us seriously now.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) - Oh! Rachel! - Sorry.
- Oh! - You coming to bed? Yes.
What's that? It's, ah the job offer.
Nepean City Education Precinct.
Are you considering it? I thought you were committed to saving our school.
Yeah, I am.
But this is a great job.
And the facilities are incredible.
What, you get to play fancy instruments? (CHUCKLES) Well, the kids get to play the instruments.
The opportunities are amazing for them.
Well, I won't be sending Atticus there.
You might once you actually see it.
Well, I don't think I will.
Well I don't need to make a decision tonight.
I'm going to bed.
(SIGHS) (POIGNANT MUSIC) There's a barbecue if you want to cook a mean steak.
(LAUGHS) - And this is the, ah, cereal cupboard.
- Mm-hmm.
If these run out, there's more over here.
What are you doing, Miss Dreyfus? Your dad's just showing me what you eat for when I look after you.
What have you got there, buddy? Is this our new school? It's an artist's impression.
Where do we play? On the roof.
How do you play football on the roof? Well, you don't.
How do you guys feel about going to the school I went to? Did you go to school? - (LAUGHS) - I thought you just played footy.
Of course I went to school, Matey.
That's where he learnt how to play footy.
The school would be really far away.
We'd move.
Go live there.
Be closer to Nana and Rafiq.
Can Izzy come too? Oh! You guys might not want me to after I look after you.
Yeah.
(CHUCKLES) I think moving is a really bad idea, Dad.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) Grovel alert.
You really think you need more hot air? Thanks, Toni.
Oh, my pleasure.
Councillor.
Just wanted to remind you before you go to San Diego.
(BEAR SQUEAKS) Can we lost the Post-its? Please.
(PHONE RINGS) Tilda didn't want to go to school today.
She said she had a tummy ache.
She didn't say anything to me.
She wasn't sick.
She (INHALES) just doesn't like being under the spotlight at school.
Well, do you blame her? Her father is public enemy number one.
(WHISPERS) I need you by my side, Gem.
I need my family.
I don't want you and Tilda to go to San Diego without me.
You need to fix things here.
I'm going to.
Not even sure you know how, do you? I'd start with your mates.
Because, if all else fails, the school won't be the only casualty.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) There's a sign out the front.
Yeah.
Went up today.
So, um, are you What's going on? Figured it's a good time.
What does that mean? What do you care? You've got your own thing going on.
Well, of course, I care.
(SIGHS) Probably looks like I'm cashing in or something.
It's nobody's business what it looks like.
(SIGHS) Is this because the school's closing? It's something I've been thinking about.
You know, moving closer to the family, and sure, with the school closing down, it But your kids love it here! They'll love being closer to Mum.
And holidays we'll be able to afford.
He's gotta do what's right for his family.
Speaking of that well, um, actually I've been offered a job at the new school.
You gonna take it? Well if it's a choice between unemployment and selling my soul (POIGNANT MUSIC) (POIGNANT MUSIC) That's it, guys.
Nice and big with the ribbons.
Look at Miss Dreyfus.
You wanna get the ribbons up and moving.
- Something's not quite right.
- I know.
We seem to be a ribbon short.
Tilda.
Don't worry, Tilda.
I'm your friend.
Thanks.
(CHUCKLES) Come on, guys.
Let's take it once more from the top.
All right, ribbons up.
Just before we do, children, I've had an email message from the Minister.
(CHILDREN CHEER) He's coming to our play.
Settling down.
The Minister was delighted that you invited him.
However, his wife is ill in hospital.
So, unfortunately, he won't be able to come to the play.
How are you going to save the school now, Ms Looby? (MOTOR WHIRRS) (MUTTERS) What are you doing? - Soil testing.
- But you have absolutely no authority.
I've got a work order from the department.
Stop it, mate.
Shut it down.
You can't hurt the tree.
That's right.
Leave the tree alone.
Look, we're on a pretty tight schedule here.
I don't care! You can't do this when there are children around.
Poppy, what are you doing? Hang on, stop.
Poppy! Oi! Careful! Hey, get down from Can you get them down, please? It's their tree.
Look, I don't want any trouble.
I'm just here to do a job.
Can't chop the tree down now.
Yeah, she's right.
Pack it up, boys.
Look out! (PEOPLE GASP) Poppy! Darling! (TENSE MUSIC) Darling? (CAMERA WHIRRS) Big smile for the board.
Thank you for finally awarding the San Diego scholarship to a woman.
Hmm.
That's if I get there.
You'll get there, even if I have to - send you via express post.
- (PHONE RINGS) Emergency.
(TENSE MUSIC) Poppy! What happened? Fall from a tree.
Suspected spinal chord injury.
- She fell from a tree? - At school.
The friendship tree.
(GASPS) It's okay.
She said she can't feel her legs.
At all.
When? When did she say that? Abi, you need to let Gemma take this.
I'll do a full exam.
Trauma series.
C.
T.
brain, C-spine.
I've got this.
Hey, baby girl.
Oh! Hey, baby.
Mama's here.
(WHISPERS) Mama's here.
Okay.
- Have you heard anything of Poppy? - Not yet.
What are you still doing here? We're securing the site.
It's a bit late for that, isn't it? Who do you work for? Take it up with council.
I will.
(EVOCATIVE MUSIC) What's Tils doing? It's from the school play.
They're doing it for Poppy.
Her her foot foot moved.
Are you sure? It moved! Yeah, yeah, it moved.
Can't feel it.
It's okay, baby.
Let's step outside and have a word.
Okay, well, um, got spinal shock, loss of sensation, reflexes.
It's, um, it's common after a major trauma.
She'll she'll get that feeling back? Hopefully.
We need to do a spinal MRI.
I was going to do the X-ray now that she's awake.
No, no, do the MRI.
(SIGHS) Do the X-ray.
Look, I I'd feel a lot more comfortable with a doctor with more experience, okay? - Mark - No.
The ED boss is on his way in.
(POIGNANT MUSIC) Why aren't you in there? Gemma's handling it.
Gemma! But she You're the expert! I'm not allowed to treat my own daughter.
What happened exactly? What was she doing? A tradesman came and they were going to cut it down, the tree.
There was a sort of an impromptu protest.
- (INHALES) - Where were you? I was there! I was there! Well, didn't you tell her to get down? Well, she she'd written on her uniform She wanted to be part of the protest, like us.
Yeah, okay.
No, I didn't.
I I, I didn't tell her to get down.
Mark it's okay.
I'm not accusing you.
Mark, Justin.
Call me.
If there's anything I can do.
Okay, mate.
Is Poppy okay? I don't know.
I just left a message.
- Fingers crossed, though.
- Hi.
- I hope it's not an inconvenient time.
- Hi.
- Well, to be honest - Just a very quick walk-through.
Are you buying our house? (LAUGHS) Oh, goodness.
We don't want to sell.
We like it.
Yeah, we're not moving.
Okay, that's enough, kids.
Come on.
In you go.
Sorry about that.
Help yourselves.
I'll be right in.
Hey.
I've heard some good news.
They're turning Nepean South Primary into a res-retail precinct.
A what? Warehouse apartments, shops, eclectic eateries, very chic.
It's good for you in the short term.
But I'd be selling before the bulldozers get here.
- (CHUCKLES) - (SNORTS) I'll go in and do my thing.
(DISCORDANT GUITAR NOTES) This looks like fun.
Is Poppy coming home? Ah, not tonight, sweetheart.
We have to watch her for a bit longer.
But I'm sure we'll know more soon.
Where's your mum? She told us to play mums and dads.
With real kids.
Right.
And how's that working out for you? Cool.
I'm playing guitar.
And we're about to make dinner.
I'm doing work, texting Poppy and looking at funny cats.
Ah.
Okay.
Excuse me.
Rachel? - Yep.
Bye.
- (KNOCK ON DOOR) Ah! Hey, you're home.
Just got off the phone to Mark.
Poppy's awake.
Oh! That's a relief.
Kids will be happy to hear that.
Ah, are you hungry? Ah, Atticus is making dinner.
Right.
The thought of cooking for six was a bit overwhelming for you? Well, four is my absolute limit.
So you told them to play mums and dads.
Well, it's the perfect opportunity for some team building.
Right.
I think we should do some team building.
Oh! Better lock the door.
No, no, no.
Not that.
Team building about my job offer.
Look, I know you're not keen but I think I have to take it.
It'll be good for us, Rach.
It's close by, I'll be doing what I want and what I think is best for for bubs and for Atticus and for you.
Real mums and dads? Yeah.
Dinner.
BOTH: Oh! - Beautiful.
- Thank you, buddy.
Oh, delicious.
Thanks, darling.
Yummo.
- Might taste better with this.
- Bring it on.
I didn't mean it.
When I said it.
When I said I I'd swap you motherhood for a scholarship, I didn't mean it.
I was just being I know.
But look, if you do think that I'm missing anything (WHISPERS) I'm glad it's you.
Last year's prep enrolments.
This year's.
Next year's.
The mayor's numbers are wrong.
Enrolments have been rising.
As of today, they're falling.
I have been taking calls from parents all morning, confirming the rumour we are being shut down.
Then I will get out there and talk to them.
(SCOFFS) They're not going to listen to you! Besides, what would you tell them? I would tell them not to give up hope.
That we can fight this.
The way this is going, the school will be empty by year's end, which is likely what they anticipated.
I have been teaching here for 18 years.
- I'm very proud of what - Heather.
Stop.
It is heart-breaking.
You need to do something, Lewis.
(EVOCATIVE MUSIC) LEWIS: Looby's right.
The council's numbers don't add up.
I need to get proof.
Gemma, what are you up to? Oh, I'm just clocking off.
Poppy's stable.
The family's all resting.
She's gonna be okay.
- Where's Tilda? - She's at Rachel's.
Hey, Gem.
Wanna be my wing man? What are you up to, Mr Crabb? (ROCK MUSIC) Mashed potatoes, yeah Yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah.
You're a sport, Sonia.
Thanks.
You know I went to Nepean South Primary for a few years.
Really? That would've been pre-2000.
Yeah.
It was a bit smaller then.
Okay, you get caught, you stole these keys from me.
- Absolutely.
- And I'm warning you some of the security cameras inside actually do work.
Got it.
I really don't know why I'm doing this.
Yeah, yeah - Oh, yeah.
- (EXHALES) Yeah, yeah Oh, yeah, yeah.
(COMPUTERISED MUSIC) Oh my God.
(PHONE MESSAGE ALERT) (TOY SQUEAKS) (CONTEMPORARY MUSIC) (GROANS) Best date night ever! What have you got? A gut instinct! - (CHUCKLES) - Oh.
She's sleeping.
A lot.
She's had major trauma.
It's it's normal.
Poppy She moved her legs! - Poppy?! - Poppy, it's Gemma.
Can you feel this? Ow! Don't pinch, Gemma.
Oh! Can I pinch you? Can you feel that? - But you can feel your legs, right? - Yeah.
(SIGHS) Oh, darling! What about if I tickle you? I can feel that too.
(LAUGHTER) NICK: That's the Education Minister.
The guy who's trying to shut down the school.
Well, the guy who could keep it open.
- MINISTER: Oh, really? - Yeah.
- Oh, good.
Okay, thanks very much.
- No worries.
Come along, boys.
- Hi, how are you going? I'm Gemma Crabb.
- Good.
- So glad to hear about Poppy.
- Yeah, thanks.
I guess he hasn't changed his mind about coming to the school play.
- Who? - The Minister! That was the Minister? Yeah.
We gotta get him to the play.
How? That's terrific.
Nice to see you.
Service lift.
Gun it.
Toni, it's Lewis.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) The show must go on, parents or not.
I'll get started.
(CLEARS THROAT) Well Welcome, everyone to the 125th year anniversary play (TENSE MUSIC) and the last in the history of Nepean South Primary.
Izzy.
Izzy, you'll have to take it.
I'm fine.
Just go, Dad.
I can watch videos.
Are you sure? Der! Okay.
Love you.
I told you I was just popping in.
Where the hell are you? Open wide.
Yes, so it looks like your driver has strep throat.
In you get.
Do I know you? Lewis Crabb.
Councillor.
Got a minute? I've got to get to an appointment.
What the hell? Would you mind moving over, Minister? There's a school play we'd like you to attend.
In 1891, on Sandy Flats, affectionately known as Bandicoot Post, a young teacher called Frances Lester began taking lessons under a tree for any local child who wanted to learn.
That's you.
That's you.
(MYSTICAL MUSIC) Sorry.
- (LAUGHTER) - Go on.
- Act important.
- Mum, my moustache.
Oh! Oh.
Okay.
Go, go, go, go! (APPLAUSE) This tree became known as the friendship tree.
(GASPS) - CHILD: Great.
- (APPLAUSE) So famous and important is the friendship tree at Nepean South that it has its own song.
- (APPLAUSE) - GIRL: Poppy! (GENTLE MUSIC) (ALL SING) When you sit under the friendship tree You are never alone When we sit under the friendship tree It always feels like home You and me under our tree Being the same through history When we sit under the friendship tree You are never alone You are never alone.
(APPLAUSE) Friendship tree inspired a school that nurtured our community.
The tree has been with us through seasons.
Through wars, drought, and even after the great fire of 1967, the flame tree was reborn.
- Da-da-da-da! Da-da-da-da! - (LAUGHTER) Look, it's the tree! - WOMAN: The tree.
- ALL ECHO: Tree, tree, tree Why are you unhappy, tree? ALL: Why are you unhappy, tree? Because! In this hand, I have the latest population report for Nepean South which shows a thriving, expanding community.
And in this hand, I have the same report from 30 years ago.
This was given to the Minister to make him believe that the population was flat-lining.
Nay, shrinking.
Could this be true, tree? ALL: Can this be true, tree? Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
And worse! Land is worth a pot of gold to the council.
And they're going to sell it to the developers to build a shopping centre.
ALL: Shopping centre? - Oh, no! - They're making it up, aren't they? - Shame on you, Councillor.
- Save our school! ALL CHANT: Save our school! Save our school! Save our school! Save our school! Save our school! - Save our school! - We just want to be heard.
Make up your own mind.
Save our school! Save our school! If this is true, it's very serious.
Save our school! Save our school! We're in the business of building better schools.
Not in shutting them down.
Do you hear that? And who's got the best school! ALL: Nepean South! (APPLAUSE) ('FIRE AND THE FLOOD' BY VANCE JOY) I saw your light on, honey In the cold I stood Anywhere I go there you are Anywhere I go there you are I've been getting used to waking up with you I've been getting used to waking up here Anywhere I go there you are Anywhere I go there you are Late at night when you can't fall asleep I'll be lying right beside you counting sheep Anywhere I go there you are - Anywhere - Anywhere I go there you are - There you are.
- What's up? There you are Is it because I'm going to Kokoda tomorrow? Uh-uh.
You're the fire Well, what is it then, baby? Because I want to stay here forever.
With our friends.
Feel you in my blood Everything is fine When your head's resting next to mine Next to mine You're the fire Yeah.
Reckon this is home.
Eh, baby? Feel you in my blood.
See you in San Diego.
Well, don't get too exhausted at Kokoda.
No chance! Oh, please! I don't believe that.
I've organised you a little surprise.
- A surprise? - Hmm.
- You'll see.
- Hmm? (UPLIFTING MUSIC) All Gemma said was to look out for a yellow ribbon.
(UPLIFTING MUSIC) Two hours in Oi! Is that it? What do we do now? - I don't know.
- (MAN CALLS) What was that? - Kane?! - Anyone order a Kokoda pie? Hold on.
(ALL LAUGH AND CHEER) G'day, I'm Nick.
G'day, mate.
I've heard all about you.
- Oh! - And Gemma organised this? Yep.
She told me to tie the ribbon to the tree and wait.
Thought I might be of some use.
Apparently things have been a bit rough.
Oh! We're all good now.
Well, I've got some great trust exercises we can try back at camp.
Shut up, Kane.
(ALL LAUGH) (UPLIFTING MUSIC) I can't believe Kane's here.
Come on! thanks PetaG
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