Liv and Maddie (2013) s03e05 Episode Script

Cowbell-a-Rooney

Ah! (Gasps) Whoa, buddy! Hey, are you okay? I guess that's a cut? (Bell rings) We're filming a scene from voltage.
Liv's new show, voltage, is filming at Ridgewood.
We're using the location money to upgrade the computer lab, and to put doors on the bathroom stalls.
You must be Liv's twin.
I'm Josh.
Maddie.
I am so sorry that I ruined one of your scenes.
It's all right.
I'll just have that evil government agent throw me into the lockers again.
(Chuckles nervously) Well, you know what? Feel free to run onto the court during a game and ruin one of my shots.
Well, I just might do that.
Do it, and you'll be walking funny for a week.
- But you just told me - I know what I said.
It's not gonna be tough telling you and Liv apart.
( Theme music playing ) Better in stereo b b better in stereo - I'm up with the sunshine - Let's go - I lace up my high tops - Oh no slam dunk, ready or not yeah, show me what you got - I'm under the spotlight - Holler I dare you, come on and follow you dance to your own beat I'll sing the melody when you say yea-ah-ah I say no-oh-oh when you say stop all I want to do is go go go you you, the other half of me me the half I'll never be-e the half that drives me crazy you you, the better half of me me the half I'll always need but we both know we're better in stereo.
Okay, porcupines.
The day you've waited for has come.
Cowbell week begins - Now! - (Cheering) Boom! Andie, you just got cowbelled! Now moo like you mean it.
(Laughs) Moo! Yeah! Aw! There is one week out of the entire year where there are no sports, so our sports-crazed school created cowbell week.
You're out when somebody hangs a cowbell around your neck.
I have been eliminated super early every year.
But this year, I think I'm dang it! Moo it out, munch.
Moo.
Yes! Oh, my first bell of the year.
I am the milkmaid.
Hear me pour.
Hey, you may have been champ for the last two years, but I'm here now.
There's no way you get the three-peat.
Maddie: Aw, well good luck my little calf, because Maddie moos for no one.
No! But this was my chance to not my intention, gumball, but it's time to moo.
Moo.
Aw.
Wow, you are fast, dump truck.
But not fast enough to 'bell the milkmaid.
You're a worthy opponent, and I'll be sad when I take you down.
(Laughs sarcastically) Please.
You are just a speed bump on my way to a three-peat.
It is on.
So this is my secret lair.
It's an old clock tower where Tess can build her gadgets, practice her powers, and deliver angst-ridden speeches.
Wow, this is so cool, Liv.
Thanks for giving us a set tour.
Yeah.
Plus Maddie can't cowbell me here.
Okay, that's what I thought when I was in the bathroom earlier.
She cowbelled me while I was Let's just say that I assumed I was safe.
Can we go up to the roof where you get your secret powers? (Gasps) In reality, that's where I keep my secret lip gloss, but go for it.
Hey, Liv.
See you tomorrow.
Oh, Josh, wait.
What are you doing with the rest of your day? Well, I'm not sure what to do around here.
If I was still in L.
A.
, me and my friends would probably hit a box-lates class.
It's a combination of boxing and pilates.
Ooh.
The workout that strengthens your core and your uppercut.
Yep.
But instead I'll probably go to my hotel and read.
I just got a book called things to do in Wisconsin when you don't have any friends.
Both: (Chuckle) I was so hyped to shoot voltage in Stevens point and stay close to my friends and family.
But it didn't really occur to me that I would be taking other people away from their friends and family and trendy workout classes.
Engine room, I need more power.
(In Scottish accent) I'm givin' you all I got, captain! Guys! I need to talk to you about something.
Is this the speech about not embarrassing you at your work? No.
I have very much given up on that one.
Anyway, um, my co-star, Josh is just having a little trouble fitting in, and I was just, you know, hoping that you could help me make him feel welcome in Stevens point.
Yeah, sure.
Uh, what's he like to do? He says he's really into box-lates, which is like pilates but with boxing.
- Both: (Chuckles) - Oh, sweet.
Well, I could build us a boxing ring.
My Uncle's barn just fell down.
Not sure how you got boxing ring from barn, but yeah, have at it.
One more thing.
No cowbell.
Just because Josh is new to Wisconsin, and he's not ready for the deep end of the cheese pool.
But cowbell week is who we are, it's what we do.
It's why we moo.
I'll let you play spaceship a little longer.
Both: Deal! Yo, Parker, I need your attention.
Yeah, and I need a cooler older brother.
Funny you should say that, because our needs are related.
Sadly, so are we.
What's up? Today, I bid farewell to my cat shirt collection.
Your cat shirts? But that's your thing.
Kids even call you "cat shirt guy.
" Exactly.
And I thought that it was just a clever and flattering nickname, but then today in gym, when we were picking teams dump truck was all, "hey, yo.
Hey, hey, oh.
"I'll take cat shirt guy, hey.
" He thinks that cat shirt guy is my name.
As did everyone else in gym.
And so I asked around school, and that's what everyone calls me now.
Ugh, even in rocketry club.
No, that's not right.
They should call you "geeky rocket guy.
" I know, right? I am trapped in an adorable prison of my own making.
Okay, so what's the plan, "getting worked up over something stupid guy?" It's time to change my image.
Cat shirt guy is dead.
Seriously? Oh yeah.
So can you, like, donate these to charity? Are you sure you want to get rid of all of these? Even "cat riding a hot dog?" "Space cat?" "Space cat two: The legend continues?" Please don't mention them by name, Parker.
It makes it that much harder than it already is.
'Cause they're my kitties.
Oh! What do you think, Josh? Wow, this is cool.
Thank you.
We built you a box-lates ring, Wisconsin style.
And by "we," I mean Andie did everything.
We even got you a sparing partner.
Did someone order a pugilist? It's a fancy word for "boxer.
" Look it up.
Let me hook you up.
Can I touch the jacket? I'll allow it.
Hey, where'd you get this contraption? I built it out of some old farm equipment.
Oh, excellent spot welding.
That's an alluring quality.
(Giggles) Whatever.
(Quietly) Stop.
Thanks for going out of your way for me, Liv.
Oh yeah.
Of course, and this is so much better than sitting alone in your hotel room, right? Wow.
You're quite the prancer.
My instructor said that footwork is 60 percent of the workout.
I'm advanced.
Girls: Oh! What are you doing? You were just supposed to work him out.
Oh See, I thought you wanted me to work him over.
Yeah, my bad.
That's on me.
My bad.
Yo, parkito.
Check out my post-cat shirt guy threads.
Well, if you're good without your cat shirts, how about we get rid of all your other cat stuff.
Kitty robes, your kitty pajamas, both footie and not.
And your kitty undergarments.
You know, I'm not sure that I have underwear that doesn't have cats on it.
You do not.
And I'll need your socks.
Whoa, whoa, bro.
My calicos, bro? They were my first pair.
They got me through middle school.
Now it's time for big boy socks.
Calicos gotta go, bro.
I knew he wouldn't do it.
Those socks put him on the kitty path like a ball of yarn he couldn't help but follow.
(Sigh) After 1,020 wearings, my toes are finally free.
I couldn't believe he gave them up.
The world had broken him, but it had not broken me.
Joseph gilligan Rooney, you will wear cats again.
Garrison, that ufo that you saw when the lightning hit me, I found it Or what was left of it.
Open the cabinet.
Well, now there's no doubt.
Your powers are not from this world.
We finally have an answer.
Do we? Where are you from Garrison? Why are you asking me this? Because I also found a missing persons report from roswell, new Mexico.
It was from 25 years ago.
Liv: Were you gonna try and tell me that this isn't you? It used to be.
There's something about me You don't know.
Wow, it's so cool when it's all put together.
- I can't wait to find out what happens next.
- (Chuckles) Wait, you know what happens next.
(Chuckles) They gave us the script last night.
Kind of tough to read when you're stuck in the fetal position from getting punched in the stomach.
- (Chuckles) - (Chuckles) Yeah, I'm really sorry about that.
Your friend, bulldozer, has a solid left.
His name is dump truck.
Please don't tell him I got his name wrong.
Um, yeah.
Listen, yesterday did not exactly go as planned.
Um, I was just trying to bring a little Los Angeles to Stevens point for you.
That's really sweet, but I already know LA.
I'm trying to get to know Stevens point.
Is there anything super Stevens pointy going on right now? I guess I didn't really think that you would be into that.
Are you kidding? I'm up for anything.
Oh, well in that case I hope you brought your swimming goggles, because we Are about to jump into the deep end of the cheese pool.
So, we call this cowbell week.
I call this awesome.
Mackenzie, I love your dress! (Gasps) I have a necklace that matches! Okay, so basically, anything goes as long as no one puts a cowbell around your neck, and then the last two people standing without cowbells face off tonight at the night of the cowbell.
- Let's do this.
- (Gasps) Hey.
Save us both some time, kid.
(Gasps) (Gasps) Aw, moo.
That bell was mine, truck.
Too bad, so sad and other childhood taunts.
Okay, so it's just down to you and Maddie and dump truck, and if one of them gets eliminated, you go to the night of the cowbell, and you're gonna become a Stevens point legend.
Not happening, prancer.
Whoa, hey, yo.
You blocked my cowbell with your doohickey.
You built a nice cowbell blocker, Andie.
This doohickey is your handiwork? Respect.
Hey, are you a scorpio? (Giggles) Whatever.
I'm sorry.
Cow-y says what? Moo.
We have the final two contestants for the night of the cowbell.
Maddie "mad dog" Rooney versus Josh "the new guy" wilcox! Oh, Josh, this is so exciting! You're going to the finals, and you're gonna win.
Not if I can help it.
Your boy's going down.
Joseph.
I need a word with you out back.
Yeah, sure thing.
I need your opinion, though.
Right side down or left side dow nah, man both sides d (Choking) (Sigh) He does not make it easy to help him.
Oh.
What are you doing with the fellas? That's I thought you were giving them away.
Yeah, I couldn't get anyone to take them.
And besides, you need a little more closure than that.
So I invented Dr.
P's kitty crusher.
Your turn.
Munch away, munch.
Sure.
Just some dumb cat clothes.
All right, then push that button! Eeh! I ca Come on.
Crush some kitties.
I can't.
I can't.
I can't do it.
I love my kitties way to much to crush them.
Joey, face it.
You're cat shirt guy.
There's no shame in that.
Okay, maybe a little shame, but you gotta accept who you are and live your best kitty cat life.
You're right, bro.
I do.
Thank you.
Did you really have to destroy such a stellar outfit? I didn't have to.
I wanted to.
Welcome to night of the cowbell.
(Cheering) You see how fun and cool this is? It is way better than hanging out behind the mini-mart eating nachos with the riff-raff.
Am I right? That's another big thing that we do.
You came on a really big week.
(Chuckles) Time for round one.
First cowbeller to miss the cow head Is the loser.
Watch and learn, new guy.
- Willow: Yeah! - Maddie: Whoa! You just got milked! Well, I brought you something to dunk in that milk.
(Cheering) Whoa, I did it! And I thought I topped out with my awesome smack talk.
That's the end of round one.
Raise that cow head! (Cheering) Andie Bustamante, I was wondering if you would do me the honor of accompanying me to the race track one evening in the near future.
Aw, dump! A catalytic converter for a big block v-eight? How did you know? Are you the type of girl who plugs in a car? I don't think so.
I'll be in touch.
Guess what? Dump truck just asked me out.
- (Sympathetically) Aww.
- She's excited.
(Excited) Aww! - Yay! - (Cowbell clanging) Round two! (Cheering) Time to add a little sizzle to this steak.
Ssss.
(Cheering) Oh! Bam! What? I don't know what that means, but it has me rattled.
No, no, no.
Josh, it's totally fine.
Stevens point is behind you, right guys? All: (Chanting) Josh, Josh, Josh.
This is for you, Stevens point.
Whoa! All: Oh! Josh! Hey, are you okay? Yeah.
I've gotten pretty good at crashing into these lockers.
Yeah Not as good as I've gotten at being cowbell week champion! (Cheering) Sorry I had to take you down, Josh, but I mean It's cowbell week.
Yeah, it's true.
I don't wear flats, and she doesn't lose.
I'm just glad I got to play.
Aw, well that Sounds like loser talk.
Which actually reminds me, I have some losers to go taunt, so (Tongue tick) Thanks for getting me out of my hotel room.
Yeah, no problem.
I'm just really happy you're making friends.
Yeah.
So Maddie.
Is she dating anyone? No, why? (Gasps) You like Maddie! How could you not? She's adorable.
I belled you! I belled you! And you wish I belled you! And I belled you in your sleep! Yes, yeah, adorable.
That is what came to my mind too.
Uh, hey Willow.
I was hoping if I didn't move, you wouldn't notice me.
No, I noticed.
It's not what it looks like, I swear.
Really? Because it looks like you're stealing Joey's clothes because you're obsessed with him.
Oh, okay.
It's exactly what it looks like.
How about I give you five bucks to pretend this never happened.
Mmm, looking is five, touching is ten.
Fine.
Here's 20.
I did some other stuff.
Don't ask.
Haaah! Maddie: You just got milked!
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