Masters of Sex Episode Scripts

N/A - Fallout

Previously on Masters of Sex Because I'm not going to convert.
What are you saying? - You picked me.
- Viv, you picked me.
It galls me to say it, but she may be one of my better students.
Johnson has a tendency to overfill her plate.
The study needs to be a priority.
Because if she did manage to stand on her own two feet, that would mean she could walk away.
I know there have been other women.
Hope you have a pleasant evening.
Dale gets me women.
I came here tonight to meet a prostitute.
We have to divorce.
I do not want a divorce.
Barton, this marriage of ours is broken.
We can resume the capping with Bill's frozen sperm, but he knows the odds are essentially a million to one.
If he thinks I've intervened, he will have my head.
Something has happened.
You're pregnant.
But that's, uh that's not possible.
I wanted to give you this.
I came up with the amount by adding up the times we've, uh participated.
Did you pay yourself? Of course not.
It's my study.
You don't mean this.
Because if you-- if you mean this Take the money.
Do you want to be alone? Masters of Sex - 1x10 "Fallout" There you are.
Aren't we supposed to be together? Ordinarily, we'd be taking your intakes separately.
But if Dr.
Masters is breaking with tradition today, I will find you some pencils.
Now, the questionnaire is essential to our research.
So just think of it as eating your greens first.
Well, I think we can skip straight to dessert tonight.
In fact, take the questionnaires home.
You can mail them back to us.
I'm sure Mrs.
Johnson can provide a stamped envelope.
Tell her to remove the pins from her hair.
They'll interfere with the leads from the electroencephalogram.
Which, actually, we won't be using tonight.
Actually, we will.
Tell her to remove her earrings, as well.
Bill, we're collecting data on male respiration during climax.
Not anymore.
Subject F-26-184 is multiorgasmic.
We were discussing her sexual history while you were wherever you were.
Mimeographing the questionnaire so that we can collect a comprehensive sexual history.
Nonetheless, multiple orgasms is a notable phenomenon, one we don't encounter often.
And a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Am I the bird or the bush? You're the volunteer, and if you would prefer to start with something more basic, like male respiration during climax She's already said she wouldn't.
You can sustain your plateau state during multiple episodes of female orgasm, can't you? We've only allotted Bill, we have two more coming in at 10:00.
I imagine they'd survive the wait, just like I did this morning when you were half-an-hour late.
Should we wait outside? He knew just what to do he'd duck and cover - Pam? - duck and cover he did what we all must learn to do - you - and you - and you - and you duck and co-- Pam? Hey.
I came over early and sent her home.
I hope that's okay.
And the kids? Comatose.
Since 8:00.
I was kind of hoping that would buy me sleepover privileges, as long as I'm out of here by the time they wake up.
We'll see how it goes.
Our last patient tonight passed out the second she climaxed.
I thought, "We've killed her.
We've killed our first subject.
" Bill said it was the vaso Vasovagal response.
It's like a power surge in your central nervous system.
Is that related to the vagus nerve? Which leaves the medulla, exiting the skull through The jugular foramen.
Bill's gonna be working for you.
What's the matter? "Too many qualified applicants"? I don't understand.
And you already have a job with the university.
I have a fellowship.
I applied for a permanent staff position and didn't get it, which is the same as being fired.
But why? Your patients adore you.
They get pregnant just so they can hang around your office.
My patients aren't the Provost of Washington University, whose daughter I didn't marry.
Do you really think Scully would do that? I'm an idiot.
I should have seen it coming.
I'm gonna have to throw myself on the mercy of the court.
Obviously, I don't want to leave.
Well, that makes four of us.
You look about as beat as me.
Bill, on a good day, is no picnic.
It's all gotten so strained for weeks now.
You know, I never asked you exactly what went on with you and Bill.
Our participation in the work became complicated.
You know what? It doesn't matter.
Whatever forces made it happen, I'm here now.
And that's all that matters.
Let us face, without panic, the reality of our time-- the fact that atom bombs may someday be dropped on our cities.
And let us prepare for survival, understanding the weapon that threatens us.
Civil Defense radiological teams, equipped with radiation survey meters, will check on contamination at any bombed area.
Stay under cover until you hear, officially, that it is safe outside.
If you have been exposed to radioactive dust, wash the exposed areas.
Pay particular attention to your hair.
If the people of Hiroshima and Nagasaki had known what we know about civil defense, thousands of lives would have been saved.
Yes, the knowledge If I'd known we were gonna be watching movies, I'd have brought popcorn.
Shh! so act now.
Someday your life may depend on it.
This morning at 9:00 Eastern, the President declared a state of national emergency and threat of invasion.
An unknown number of Soviet warplanes have penetrated our airspace.
Today, it's a drill.
But tomorrow, it may well be reality.
This exercise is the largest-scale civil defense simulation in American history.
Half a million federal employees and state and local personnel will participate, as will this hospital.
At the sound of the first siren, you'll take cover in a secure room, away from windows and doors, just as you would in an actual nuclear event.
This evening, there will be a second siren, where you'll rehearse the hospital's intake and triage functions.
Now, this is more than a test of readiness.
It's a test of your resolve.
Our will is stronger than the forces that would do us harm and erase our way of life.
And your vigilance today may spell the difference between life and death.
And now a few words about nuclear fallout.
In the event of a thermonuclear blast, radioactive particles Four dot.
It's all over the radio.
They're emptying Times Square.
I heard Eisenhower's evacuating the White House in a helicopter.
Better hope it doesn't crash.
Can you imagine, Dick Nixon as president? We should all be preparing for the worst.
You know the Lippincotts dug a bomb shelter? They didn't.
Right under the rose trellis.
They've got a six-month supply of canned food, a pump toilet, and the complete works of Shakespeare.
Three bam.
Honestly, the bomb is the least of Peggy Lippincott's worries.
She caught Donald with his dental hygienist.
He flew to Reno for a quickie divorce.
Well, if Donald's cheating on her, maybe she's better off without him.
Sometimes a divorce can be a blessing.
For a 53-year-old woman? So, she's gonna lose the house, she's looking for rentals in Forest Park, and it's filled with Italians.
I ran into Peggy in the parking lot at Kroger's.
She said all their friends have picked sides.
And her daughter stopped speaking to her.
She told Peggy, "You must have done something to drive daddy away.
" The husband strays.
The wife pays.
Oh, two dot.
Mahjong! Oh! Well, if the Russians drop the bomb, at least Peggy's store of canned goods will last twice as long.
I'd rather be at ground zero.
Here you go.
- Count them up.
- Okay.
today, we'll bring you breaking news on the biggest nationwide air-raid drill ever attempted, as from coast to coast, millions Dr.
Masters? I-I was looking for you in your office.
You're not my 1:00 unless you're a very spry 68.
I don't have an appointment, but my sister said there would be no shame in asking for help.
She said you would know what to do.
What to do about Uh I'm three months pregnant.
These are the papers from the test to prove it.
Well, that's, uh happy news, but there is a protocol for new mothers.
First, a scheduled consultation for you and your husband-- I don't have a husband or a boyfriend.
If this is about an unwanted pregnancy and you're asking for my assistance, you've come to the wrong place.
You don't remember me, do you? It's probably the clothes.
Last time you saw me, I wasn't wearing any.
I volunteered for your science project.
You did.
Forgive me.
That was some months ago, wasn't it? It was three months ago.
I have checks for your signature-- one for the new slide projector, and we never paid Lester.
Virginia, you have signing authority.
Use it.
Don't take it out on me if your bedside manner is costing you patients.
Oh, that woman was not a patient.
She was a volunteer.
In the study? Was she a solo participant? Unfortunately, no.
Otherwise, she wouldn't be pregnant.
She brought in her test results.
Three months.
Claims she had no other recent partners.
Oh, my God.
That poor girl.
What was she asking for? Something I'm not at liberty to give her.
She came back to find out the name of the man she was paired with in the study.
Who was she paired with? I don't know, and it doesn't matter.
Anonymity is the bedrock of our work.
I am ethically bound to safeguard the privacy of all participants, hers included, if the roles were reversed.
You mean if the man had gotten pregnant.
Diaphragms have a 6% fail rate.
We have paired over 200 couples.
Given a large enough sample, accidents are statistically inevitable.
Accidents? We're talking about a baby, conceived in one of our exam rooms.
By a volunteer.
No one forced her to participate.
You cannot pretend that we have no responsibility-- We made a promise to protect the identity of our subjects.
We can't go back on that.
We have to do something.
Well, something was done three months ago.
We drew up an ironclad legal waiver.
She and her partner both signed it, meaning we are not liable for any unintended consequences.
Can I sit? I wouldn't advise it.
I don't know what Vivian has told you about our parting, - but I want to explain-- - If I was in the mood for a postmortem, I'd go down to the morgue.
Sir, your daughter is smart, she's beautiful, she knows her own mind-- She's devastated, my daughter, wondering what she did wrong, how she failed you, tearing herself up as if this is her fault when the truth is, you're the one that can't find his own ass with both hands.
I'm asking you to separate your personal feelings from your professional decision to terminate me from this hospital.
You think I got to be Provost by holding on to grudges? I was prepared to accept the board's decision to hire you, but I didn't have to.
- You were not recommended.
- That can't be true.
I read the letter Dr.
Kernohan wrote.
- It was glowing.
- You failed your performance review.
Some of your superiors had concerns that you lacked the professionalism and character to represent this institution.
It was Bill.
I could only vouch for your lack of character in general.
I wanted to love Vivian, I really did.
But you can't pick what you love.
My daughter dodged a bullet.
Let's leave it at that.
You know the heat blast from an H-bomb can incinerate a telephone pole What do you say we get out of here and take a drive? I'm a casualty.
I'm a doctor.
We're a perfect match.
Civil defense is nothing to joke about.
And you should be thinking about your wife at a time like this.
Wonder if the secretaries are friendlier in Moscow.
What? I don't understand.
Honestly, we're as shocked as you are.
Her name is Flora Banks.
First of all, you never told me their names.
They were simply numbers, night after night.
I-I have no idea-- She's blond.
average-sized breasts, typical areolae Everyone has typical areolae! You were paired with her on March 10th, for one episode of missionary coitus lasting 6 minutes, 18 seconds.
This is a joke.
What about all the other guys you-- you paired her with? I mean, I was paired up with maybe a dozen.
She only had one partner in the study and no boyfriend, so she filled out a detailed sexual history.
Look, this is your problem, not mine, okay? It's your study.
I was basically an organ donor.
And if she didn't use protection-- Her diaphragm failed.
It happens more often than you'd think.
What does she want from me? I mean, she want money? Elise balances our checkbook.
She's like a-- like a bloodhound.
I have no idea what she wants.
And I'm not saying this is anything other than extremely unfortunate, but I thought you deserved to know.
Here's her name and her phone number.
What did Bill say about all this? Let's forget about Bill for a minute.
I am willing to help here in any way I can.
If you're at home when the bomb hits, just stick a white plate on your windowsill.
Any dust that collects is probably fallout.
And if you discover you do have fallout? I think you're supposed to close the window.
And today, when the thingy goes off The air-raid siren? We're just supposed to lie there? If you have a desk, get under it.
I know some of you share, but just do your best.
What the hell is going on? Telephone's ringing off the hook.
Sorry, Dr.
I'm fourth-floor hall Marshall for civil defense.
When Khrushchev pushes the button, you can have the morning off.
Until then, you're still my secretary.
_ Go to your stations! Get down! Mrs.
Johnson! We are under attack! You need to find a safe place and stay put until they sound the all-clear.
We're supposed to be facedown on the floor.
Although I think that's chewing gum.
Frankly, I hope a bomb does hit this hospital.
I'm not having a great morning, either.
There was a letter waiting on my desk.
The university has approved my pap smear proposal.
But that's fantastic news.
They included a check.
$600? Nearly as much as the hospital spent on emergency Bibles for its civil defense program.
Not enough for lab equipment or a proper staff.
It'll pay for mimeographs and the hiring of a secretary, at minimum wage.
Well, Rome wasn't built in a day.
Neither were outreach clinics.
You'll get it funded, eventually.
"Eventually" isn't good enough.
I wasted three months on that proposal, laying groundwork, sucking up to the administration I'm sorry.
Sucking up? I have been perfectly polite with the board.
I'm sure you have been polite.
You might want to try being pleasant.
What does being pleasant have to do with women's health? Cervical cancer isn't pleasant.
Bill Masters isn't pleasant.
That's true.
But the rules are different for men and women.
Trust me, a little charm goes a long way.
Pearls of wisdom from the steno pool.
I apologize if I'm overstepping.
And I know we've had our differences, but I've sat in your class, I've read your proposal.
If this place was a meritocracy, the board would be throwing money at you.
The fact that it's an uphill climb, then it just proves that the work is important.
If anybody has the backbone to see it through, it's you.
Well thank you.
See? That's how it's done.
Trust me, you'll catch more flies with honey.
The Chancellor of Washington University is not a fly.
Even better-- he's a wasp.
Just ask him about his golf game.
Is Masters under his desk? He's got a uterine myoma.
And by the way, Austin, you should be on the ground with your hands over your head.
I'll take my chances.
What the hell are you doing? Air-raid siren-- means nuclear attack.
The attack is a simulation-- unlike Mrs.
Gallagher's fibroids, - which, I assure you, are real.
- Bill! Bill, thank God you're here.
Look, I need to know if I'm protected in this thing.
Oh, God, there is no bomb! No, not-- not the bomb.
The study.
Look, I'm not insensitive to the needs of women.
I mean, I read "Jane Eyre" in college.
Or, no, Jane Austen.
Langham-- I already have a family.
If this got out-- I mean, my wife's father is an ex-cop-- Austin-- Every time we're at the house, he drags me down to the basement to check out - his gun collection! - Austin, shut up.
The anonymity of our subjects is nonnegotiable, even in extraordinary circumstances.
You are protected by the forms you signed.
They are, in effect, ironclad.
So, I'm all-- all clear? You are all clear.
Where's Dr.
Epstein? He's a casualty.
Well, I need a second.
Who's on call? Dr.
Haas will be coming in.
Well, that's unacceptable.
Haas is not qualified to assist in a myomectomy.
He performed one two days ago.
Masters, it's been an unusual day.
We're at war with Russia.
Gallagher has been under for 25 minutes.
We all need to make accommodations.
Head injuries over here.
Amputations are over there.
What are you, radiation poisoning? Yes, ma'am.
So, you're making a movie? Not a feature film, per se.
Technically, it's more of a live-action documentary short.
But if the reds nuke us, this could be the last record of human civilization-- like the relics at Pompeii.
It was an ancient city.
Where they opened that new Woolworth's? So, what is it you want us to do, exactly? Oh, j-just jump back under those desks of yours.
So you can film under our skirts.
Jane-- Jane can vouch for my bona fides as a director.
We have spent several evenings together conducting important scientific research.
He's obviously delusional.
It's probably all the toxic chemicals in the photo lab.
You know, real movie directors don't walk around with their flies down.
they say that love is just a mistake but one thing's for sure it's always give-and-take man wants his woman woman wants her man what they really need nobody understands no matter how we try, it's always Singapore sling.
Haven't had one of those in 30 years.
'Course if I had one now, you'd have to wheel me home on a stretcher.
Are you, uh working here at the hotel tonight? Do I look like a chambermaid? No.
It's just, you hears rumors about the Chadwick Hotel, that lonely men come here to, you know meet women.
- Vic, the check.
- Please wait.
I-I'm not gonna call a policeman.
I just want to talk to you about your job.
It's about my husband.
He-- he enjoys the company of professional women and he doesn't enjoy mine.
I thought if I knew some of the tricks of the trade, how to give him what he wants You're joking.
I'll-- I'll pay you for your time.
Two Singapore slings You got it.
on Mamie Eisenhower here.
So, what, you caught him shacked up in some fleabag with a girl half your age? I saw him with the man who arranges his dates for him.
A pimp? I suppose that's the word for it.
But he looked more like one of the caddies at the club.
Meaning? Clean-cut, charming, very handsome.
Maybe they're growing pimps different these days.
Well, I suppose my point is, you must work with married men.
What do they want? You know, they've all got their little quirks.
Like cars.
Some you got to jiggle the key in the ignition.
Some ride hot.
Some need a jump-start.
But they've all got wheels.
You just need to know which pedal to push.
What does your husband go for? Well, he loves opera, Salisbury steak, Agatha Christie.
I meant in bed.
Uh We don't sleep in the same bedroom.
But back when I was able to lure him into my room, um Well, we-- we never looked at each other.
You screwed with your eyes closed.
He preferred for me to face away Like he couldn't look at me.
But it's not like he looks at other women.
We went to Tahiti a few years ago-- they don't wear tops there, the-- the native girls.
All those perfect brown breasts, just like a Gauguin painting.
But my husband, he just sat there on the beach with his nose in a medical journal.
He never even turned his head.
He's queer.
It's very queer, yes.
Thank you.
No, sweetheart.
He's a homosexual.
You can't give your husband what he likes.
Your husband likes boys.
Nicely done, Dr.
Thank you.
Did you know that I have the highest surgical success rate of any fellow at Maternity in the last 10 years? I checked.
You'd think that might factor into a performance review.
Actually, my rating's within striking distance of yours when you were a fellow.
Numbers aren't everything.
Oh, I thought you were a God when I got here.
I even bought a bow tie.
No, we're never going to be friends.
But I respect you as a doctor.
And I think you respect me, too, and if you want to know the truth-- I don't.
Respect you.
Not in the least.
Maybe it's the fact that I'm with Virginia now, huh? And that's what this is really about, isn't it? Clear the room.
All of you, out-- now.
She didn't have to tell me, you know.
It was obvious.
Who, Virginia? You think I believe in miracles? Did you think I wouldn't know, with her sleeping right there beside me? You're lucky I don't come after your medical license.
I have no idea what you're talking-- Unh! I'm talking about my pregnant wife! Libby's pregnant? Jesus.
I know what you did.
You're finished at this hospital.
Any normal man would be shaking my hand right now.
I mean, you may not like the way it happened-- You stepped into something you can't even begin to understand, like a child-- willful and stupid, completely unaware of what you've done! I capped Libby because you were too selfish to do it yourself.
I like your wife.
She deserves to be a mother.
And you know what? Even though it cost me my job, I'd do it again.
Back to the triage drill, will commence in 30 minutes.
Chancellor Fitzhugh.
Lillian DePaul, one of your happy minions on the fourth floor.
What a delightful necktie.
What would you call that color? Red.
You look like a man who enjoys the links.
Are you a member at Norwood Hills? Hmm.
For 20-odd years.
Although I never find the time.
Of course, they find the time to bill you.
My wife's on the membership committee.
What's your wife's handicap? Estelle had polio as a girl, but with her cane, she gets around just as well as you or I.
Well, speaking of women's health, I have a program in cancer detection, which could use the support of a man with your unique vision.
What form? Well, a check, ideally.
What form of cancer? Oh.
I suppose if a woman were going to dabble in cancer, that would be the natural choice.
- Or uterine.
- Or breast.
We have two of those.
I'd welcome the opportunity to walk you through my proposal.
My secretary can arrange an appointment.
I spoke to her.
Your next opening is in three weeks.
But I thought, if you were free for a drink this evening Dr.
DePaul-- Lillian.
DePaul, I don't know what kind of notions you've picked up on the fourth floor, but I am a happily married man.
My office-- now.
Shut the door.
Perhaps I didn't make myself clearer this morning-- you are not to bother Dr.
Langham about this pregnancy matter.
"Pregnancy matter"? Do you have any idea what it takes to raise a child as a single mother? We don't know the first thing about that woman, Virginia.
We know plenty.
We know the diameter of her areolae.
We know her heart rate during climax, how quickly she moves into the plateau phase, - systolic pressure-- - Exactly.
Our subjects stand naked in our exam rooms.
They copulate with strangers.
What we offer in return is a simple promise-- a promise to honor their privacy-- a promise you broke.
I did not break Langham's anonymity.
I gave him a choice.
No, you trapped him, Virginia.
He no longer has a choice, because he can never unknow what you told him.
You did this all on your own, against my wishes.
Honest to God, Virginia, who do you think you are?! Everyone take your positions! We have 1,400 casualties on the way! Ethan? That's stage blood, isn't it? Unfortunately, no.
Your boss sucker-punched me.
Bill hit you? Thanks, Roberta.
Would you I guess I deserve it for giving the guy the best gift of his life.
Ethan, what is going on? Uh, it has to do with Libby, her blank-shooting jackass of a husband, and how she really got pregnant.
Well, California's been wiped off the map.
They're announcing death tolls on the radio like they're baseball scores.
What are you doing here? I remembered you like to swim at night.
I had to get out of the hospital.
Couldn't bring myself to go home.
All anyone wants to talk about is the end of the world.
It feels like it is the end.
Look, I know we didn't leave things on the best terms.
So, if, um you want me to buzz off Did you bring your bathing suit? Thank you for meeting me.
It's-- it's been quite a day.
Did the doc tell you to call me? Clean up the mess? Well, that would take a pretty big mop.
I'm not fishing for a husband, if that's what you think.
I didn't even like that guy.
But this kid is half his, and I thought maybe I could get to know him.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
I can't give you his name or his information.
Then what is this? Not enough.
It never is.
Trust me, I have two.
But it's better than nothing.
This is from you? No, it's from the man who's responsible.
I hope I didn't ruin your shot.
Oh, uh I can cut around you.
Though I-I'm no great fan of montage.
I don't suppose you've read André Bazin, "The Ontology Of The Photographic Image"? I'm waiting for the movie.
It's pretty theoretical.
Pseudorealism versus true realism.
What's the difference? Honestly, I have no idea.
You know, the film you're shooting won't survive a nuclear attack.
Nothing will.
Except cockroaches.
And Godzilla.
They don't tell you this in civil defense class-- but I've been reading this book, "On The Beach"-- and the H-bomb has a blast radius 10 miles wide.
If one falls on St.
Louis, they won't even find our teeth.
We'll just be numbers in an official death toll added up in some city far away.
At the end of the day, if you're facing global annihilation, you can only be accountable for yourself.
If it were the last night on Earth, I'd feel really bad about what I said to you earlier.
So I'm sorry.
And if-- if it were the last night on Earth I'd kiss you.
I need to speak with you, Bill.
Well, it'll have to wait until tomorrow.
It's past dinner hour.
Libby will be expecting me home.
Is she? Expecting? I do hope you'll congratulate her for me.
After everything she's been through, it is wonderful news-- Libby's pregnancy.
Virginia Bill, I never felt smaller than I did the day that you offered to pay for my participation in our study.
I spent weeks trying to figure out why you would treat me that way like I was just some random volunteer, or worse, but now I understand.
I'm sure you can imagine Libby's reluctance to talk about the baby.
That's not why you didn't tell me.
It's because you felt guilty Because you had formed an attachment to me.
It's been a trying day.
You're emotional.
No, Bill.
You are.
You do always say that we that can't let emotions cloud our judgment, but you did.
Which means it was never really about the research.
We were having an affair.
Are you finished? No.
Not quite.
I met with Flora Banks tonight.
Subject F-26-132.
And I gave her a check for $2,000 from the discretionary fund.
You did what? You obviously think that money is the best way to handle the problem.
That is a gross violation-- I have the legal authority.
You granted it to me.
Although it still is a fireable offense.
But don't worry, Bill.
I quit.
I got some lousy news today.
So did I.
Trust me, I think I got you beat.
'Course, if they drop the bomb, none of it matters anyway.
You know we're building artificial satellites? Shoot 'em into space, and they just float around.
No tether.
No responsibilities.
That's how I used to feel.
They're not actually floating.
Hmm? My daughter took a science class.
I borrowed her book.
There are thousands of objects in orbit.
Gravity pulls them toward Earth, but the Earth keeps curving away underneath them.
They're not actually floating.
What they're really doing is falling.
I see you still need a secretary.
You look nice.
I look like a rodeo clown.
Though a clown would have had more success charming the Chancellor.
The Chancellor works for the trustees, doesn't he? Technically, I suppose.
Well, then, we'll just have to charm them.
a 20-kiloton blast over Niagara Falls, a 2-megaton blast over Seattle, and a single-megaton blast over Detroit in this grim rehearsal for disaster.
Early estimates suggest more than half the country's population would have been killed or injured in the day's attacks, with clouds of radioactivity rendering parts of the country uninhabitable for years to come.
In New York City alone, the death toll stands at 2,339,000.
The all-clears have sounded, but all is not well in America tonight.
Our sole consolation-- it was only a test.
and she clings to me we talk of the future but what do we see? there's a mushroom cloud that hangs in the way tomorrow looks black, so we live for today please, please, please, where did you go? where did you go? oh, please, please, please, where did you go? where did you go? oh, please, please, please, where did you go? where did you go?