Monk s03e15 Episode Script

Mr. Monk and the Election

Hello, I'm calling on behalf of Natalie Teeger, who's running for the school board in your district.
Are you registered to vote? Oh, my goodness.
I just love that sign in the window.
Who Who made the sign, do you know? - Her daughter.
- Oh, it's so colorful! - Where should I put these? - I don't know.
Oh, well.
You know, I've never run for anything in my life, but I just got so angry.
You know, My daughter Julie goes to Ashton, and I love it.
It is such a wonderful school.
But they want to close it and consolidate it with the high school, - which would be such a huge mistake.
- Piece-of-crap copier.
Could you excuse me for one second? I'll be right back.
Just one second.
All right, tell me something good.
You know, this company, Tazarr, went out of business, which is a good thing.
Where did you get it? Uh, at a police auction.
They just delivered it this morning.
I got the fax machine and the computer there, too.
- They don't work either.
- Well, you get what you pay for.
Here's your problem.
The primary feeder is jammed.
There's somethin' in there, I can't get to it.
See? - It's locked.
- Mmm-hmm.
Did they give you a key for this? Oh, yeah, I think so.
Let me check.
Oh.
Vote Teeger.
Hello.
Uh, I'm with the Fairfield Eagle.
We're doing a story on the election.
Why did you decide to volunteer? I'm not a volunteer.
I'm her boss.
That's an interesting angle.
Not every boss would allow his employee time off to run for office.
Well, I didn't have a choice.
She just said she was doing it.
Got it.
Now, what do you think is the most important issue in this campaign? For me, there's really only one issue here.
If Natalie wins, who will take care of me? No, I'm asking you.
Who? - Do you know? No.
- No, sorry.
Not even close.
Can't Can't you just break it open? I only need if for five days.
The election is on Tuesday.
Watch out! Watch out! Get down! Get down! Natalie, get down! MONK Season 3 Epi.
15 Mr.
Monk and the Election Hey, Monk.
- I got you.
I got you.
- All right.
How's Natalie doing? She's scared to death.
So, the security guard? Yeah, wrong place, wrong time.
Hmm, where was the shooter? Right over here.
You can kind of see an impression in the tar paper, but Well, uh How are the footprints? Unusable.
The witnesses are all over the map, too.
Some say they heard five shots, some say nine.
You sure? Of course you're sure.
How did they come? Were they evenly spaced? Bang.
Bang, bang.
Bang.
- Bang, bang, bang, bang.
- Rapid fire, semi-automatic.
We haven't found any shells.
Guy did a pretty good cleanup job.
Well, maybe he's done this before.
Monk, what do you got? Well, the The roof slants at a weird angle right here.
Do you have a bullet? He missed one.
It's a 7.
62.
AK? Yeah, Kalashnikov.
Russian.
That's somethin'.
Call Grooms at the Bureau, and the ATF.
Maybe they have an idea.
Captain, we found something.
You might want to check it out.
What you got? Looks like a note.
"Natalie Teeger must withdraw.
" Son of a bitch, he was after Natalie.
Well, that doesn't make sense.
It's just a school board election.
I mean, who cares? He spelled her name wrong.
He was probably in a rush.
I don't think so.
It looks like he took his time.
He dotted all the "I's," crossed the "T's.
" - He spelled her name wrong.
- Whatever.
Motive.
Motive, motive.
Let's start with the obvious.
Who's running against her? Yeah, I've got it right here.
Harold Jay Krenshaw.
You've got to be kidding.
Harold Jay Krenshaw? He's running for school board? - You know him? - He's a patient of Dr.
Kroger's.
Uh, I met him in the waiting room.
This guy has got some serious problems.
He drives everybody he meets crazy.
I mean, he's He's just Nobody is accusing anybody of anything here.
This is just a friendly conversation.
In fact, I bought some doughnuts.
Mr.
Krenshaw, do you know why you're here? Well, it's pretty obvious.
I'm running for school board against Natalie Teeger and somebody took a shot at her.
A security guard was killed.
I heard about that.
I'm sorry.
Do you own a gun, Mr.
Krenshaw? Yes, I do.
My father was a a hunter.
He bought me a Remington rifle when I was a kid.
- Just the Remington? - That's right.
Are you a good shot? I'm an exceptional shot.
Miss Teeger has decided to drop out of the Out of the race.
How do you feel about that? Well, it doesn't matter.
She couldn't win anyway.
Why? That school needs to be closed.
Everybody knows it.
I'd be happy to take a polygraph test if you want.
What are you What are you doing? I'm eating a doughnut.
It's food.
- W-Why that one? - Because I like the coconut.
- Now you have to eat a sugar one.
- I don't want a sugar one.
Or you could take three more coconuts and two chocolate.
Or one coconut and two glazed.
Or you could just eat them all.
That would probably be easier, huh? - That's a good idea.
- Probably be easiest.
- Yeah.
- Or I could do this.
There.
Now there's one doughnut.
One big damn doughnut.
- You see what you did? - Could we get back to this? Mr.
Krenshaw, where were you at 10:30 this morning? I was at Dr.
Kroger's office.
I had my my appointment.
Your appointment ends at 10:00.
It was a double session.
Dr.
Kroger doesn't do double sessions anymore.
I'm just telling you.
He made an exception for me.
If you don't believe me, call him.
- Do you want his beeper number? - I have his beeper number, okay? Well, if that doesn't work, try his cell phone.
- He gave you his cell phone number? - Mmm-hmm.
- That's a lie.
He's lying, Captain.
- Hmm.
'Cause Dr.
Kroger would never give anybody his cell phone number, ever.
Not ever.
Monk, I really don't care.
I've been to his home.
- Have you no shame? - Excuse me.
A man died today.
- I met his daughter.
- Liar! Liar! Are you seeing this? Kindergarten playground in there.
Captain, captain, it's not me, is it? Am I? Just tell me, am I am I that guy? Am I am I that far gone? Relax, Monk, you are completely different.
You put the chocolate doughnuts in the middle, which makes perfect sense, because that way the different groups are together.
Exactly! That's all I'm saying.
And he put the chocolate donuts on either end, which j-just isn't as good, because that way, they're they're separated.
- Hello! - No comparison.
I told you.
He will he will drive you crazy.
- So, is he the guy? - Uh, no.
I wish he was, but he's not the guy.
He never would have misspelled Natalie's name on the note.
How do you know? Because Because I wouldn't have.
Let's do the polygraph test anyway, to be sure.
Right.
Well, what's he doing now? What's this? Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Not vertically.
Not vertically! Be right back.
- You hungry? - Yeah.
Let's get something to eat.
What about them? - They'll be fine.
- Yup.
Ow! I'm I'm glad you're quitting.
Really, it's just just a stupid election.
I mean, it's not worth getting killed over.
Right? Besides, you can run again in another four years.
Right? Mom? What are you guys doin'? Well, we're packin' everything up.
Put it back.
Come on.
Let's get to work.
We have an election to win.
I'm Natalie, please vote for me.
Hi, I'm Natalie Teeger.
I'm running for school board.
- Miss Teeger? - Hi, my name's Natalie Teeger.
Hey, Miss Teeger? What are you doing? I'm running for office.
Hi, Natalie Teeger.
Thank you.
I thought you had dropped out of the race.
Changed my mind.
- Why? - I have my reasons.
Hi, uh, are you registered to vote? Who are you gonna vote for? It's time to wear a pin.
Mr.
Ellis? You're scaring him.
- Okay.
- He's scaring me.
Vote Teeger! Hi, vote for Natalie Teeger.
Vote Teeger! Hi, vote for Natalie Teeger.
Where did you find them? They heard about the shooting and wanted to help.
I can't protect you out here.
There are too many rooftops, too many windows.
That's a risk I'm willing to take.
Thank you.
You have to think about Julie.
I am thinking about Julie, Mr.
Monk.
More than you know.
She won't listen to me.
Did you talk to Harold Krenshaw? We don't think Mr.
Krenshaw is involved.
His alibi is airtight, and he just passed a polygraph.
We're working with ATF to track down the weapon.
In the meantime, Miss Teeger, I need for you to cancel all public appearances.
I can't do that.
Okay.
We need to sweep the campaign office for explosives every morning.
- Yes, sir.
I want a lockdown.
Two uniforms, round the clock.
Even when she's not there.
Yes, sir.
And I am assigning you a bodyguard.
Lieutenant, thank you for volunteering.
- He's my bodyguard? - 24-7.
I'm still not droppin' out.
That's not my job.
It is now.
All clear.
- Is Julie here today? - No.
She's staying with my parents until you guys figure out what's the hell is going on.
Okay, Natalie, if this school closes, who would benefit? Would they sell the building? No.
The city would keep it and use it for special education classes.
That doesn't make any sense.
I mean, there there is no motive.
I I know.
There are 14 other members on the board.
Most of them agree with me.
What, is this maniac going to kill off the whole school board? Oh.
- Yo! - Miss Teeger! Please, don't do that.
- What? - Walk away without telling me.
- I went 5 feet.
- Still.
It's protocol.
Ow! I don't think this was about the school at all.
I can't stop thinking about that note and how he misspelled your name.
What do you think it means? I don't know.
- But it's important.
- Hmm.
Hmm, brings back memories, huh? Yeah.
But what are you gonna do? I used to love tetherball.
It wasn't really my game.
- What was your game, Mr.
Monk? - Give it, give it! Keep-away.
I played a lot of keep-away.
Keep-away? I was usually the jumper.
That was my position.
- It was good exercise, too.
- Hey, jump for it, squirt.
The ball was movin' around Cardiovascular.
Jump.
Now, now! Jump! Oh, this kid's timing is way off.
- It's all about timing.
- Crybaby.
Now, now he's crying? I usually started crying a lot earlier.
But everybody's got a different style.
You played this a lot? All through high school.
Some college.
Got pretty good at it.
The secret to keep-away is you have to have a lot of other hats at home, and not get too attached to any of them.
It was a good match.
Oh, honey, I can't.
Not tonight.
I have a big debate tomorrow.
I have to go home and practice.
I know, I miss you too.
I love you, angel.
You be good for Grandma and Grandpa, okay? All right, bye.
Mr.
Monk? Please.
A little help? Hi, hello.
Can I help? Of course, you can.
The more the merrier.
Here you go.
You take a flyer, you fold it up, in the envelope, and seal it.
Here you go.
- There's five.
- All right.
Hey, hey, Karen.
Hey, Donna.
Hey, Lee-John.
Who's hungry? I have homemade lasagna.
A little fuel to keep us going.
Mr.
Monk, are you hungry? An army marches on its stomach.
Oh, no.
No, thank you.
Herr General, eat.
Keep your strength up.
You've got a big debate tomorrow.
Excuse me.
I think I'd better try this.
A little too much oregano, but it's not poison.
That's what every cook likes to hear.
Ahem, listen, Natalie, do you want me to get this copier out of here? I could take it to the junkyard for you.
I got a buddy with a truck.
Thank you, Jack, but I got the repair guy comin' back tomorrow to check it out.
Besides, it makes a hell of a buffet, right? Miss Teeger, you have a phone call.
- No, don't put me on hold.
- Natalie, do you still have the poster Julie made? The one that was above the door? Yeah, I think it's behind those boxes.
It was missing an "R.
" I found it over there.
Oh, It must've fallen off when she was putting it up.
The sniper didn't know her name.
That's why he misspelled it.
So, all he knew was what he saw on this poster.
What does it mean? Well, it means, the note he left was just a diversion.
This wasn't about you at all.
All right, this will be the podium.
Uh, Lieutenant, do you have the questions? - Yeah.
- All right, let's get started.
Mr.
Monk, you will be the moderator.
If you'll come right over here.
He had to be shooting at somebody.
So why was he trying to scare you? You said it was a diversion.
But diversion from what? It doesn't make any sense.
No, I can't worry about that.
I have a debate tomorrow.
I have to practice.
- Sorry.
- Sorry.
- Okay.
- Hello, welcome to the debate.
I'll be your moderator.
Who has the first question? Lieutenant.
Miss Teeger, "Why should the entire community pay to keep Ashton Junior High open?" Miss Teeger, you have 30 seconds.
That's a very good question.
It's true that closing Ashton Junior High would save the taxpayers money.
But it would cost $1.
20 - What are you doing? - 22.
I don't have a stopwatch.
20 - 19 - Mr.
Monk, I can't concentrate.
17,16 more than offset Please stop.
Just stop counting! Thank you.
Could you repeat the question? - Miss Teeger - Time's up.
Come on! Miss Teeger, are you all right? I'm fine.
It's a grenade.
Get rid of it! - You all right? - Yeah.
Disher told me that you put the grenade in the refrigerator.
- Yeah.
And then he said you went back and opened it again.
You just had to straighten something out, didn't you? I'm gonna ask the Mayor to give you a medal for what you did.
And then I'm gonna ask the Mayor to take that medal back.
Because you just had to open that door, didn't you? - So it's a wash? - Yeah, it's a wash.
Captain, that grenade had Russian markings.
I know.
We found a piece of it.
It was made in Chechnya.
This guy must be very well connected.
Whoever he is, you must be making him nervous.
- How's Natalie? - She's fine.
But you got to talk to her, Monk.
She still won't quit.
Even after this.
Natalie, it's me.
Come in.
I'm not quitting.
Natalie, look.
We We We don't know who this guy is.
We don't know what's going on.
Then figure it out, Mr.
Brilliant Detective, figure it out, because I'm not quitting.
- I can't quit.
- Of course you can! I see.
You can't quit because Mitch was a hero.
You don't understand.
I can't quit because Mitch wasn't a hero.
Close the door.
What I'm about to tell you dies with you.
Do you understand? Okay.
My husband and two crewmembers were shot down over Kosovo in 1998.
They crash-landed behind enemy lines.
Mitch didn't make it out.
But they rescued the other crewmembers.
And when they got back, they said They said he panicked.
They said that after the crash, he ran off with the radio and all their supplies.
- They said he was a coward.
- Oh, my God.
And the Navy can't prove their version of the story, but it's in the record.
It's in a file somewhere.
- Natalie.
- I don't know what the real story is.
But all I know is some day, Julie is going to start asking questions about her father.
He's not here.
But I'm here.
I'm all she has.
I can't be a coward, too.
Hello.
Welcome to the fifth District School Board debate.
We're all aware of the controversy and tragedy surrounding this election.
But tonight we're going to try to rise above all that and focus on the issues.
I'm going to ask our two candidates to make a brief opening statement.
Natalie, why don't you go first? Uh Good evening.
I'm Natalie Teeger, and I'm running for school board for one reason.
To save my daughter's school.
As a mother, I know you can't put a price on a good education.
- And if we don't invest in our children - Jack.
- What are you doin'? - not only their future - Oh, well, I I have a question.
- Cool.
Give 'em hell, man! - Yeah.
Hey, check this out.
I designed a new flyer for the campaign.
We can hang them up tomorrow near the polls.
- Okay, great, thanks.
- I will work with all of you to make this school, and the entire system, work even better.
Thank you.
Next, we'll hear from her opponent, Mr.
Harold Krenshaw.
Hello.
I'm Harold Krenshaw.
You all know me.
You know where I stand.
Reduce the budget, lower taxes.
If that means consolidating a few of our schools, then that's what we have to do.
Yeah.
Okay.
Who has the first question? Please state your name.
My name is Adrian Monk.
Uh, my question is for Mr.
Krenshaw.
Mr.
Krenshaw, during this campaign, you have made a number of statements.
I wonder if you might be able to substantiate one of those statements for us right now.
You said that you have been to Dr.
Kroger's house.
- Oh, God.
- That's right.
In fact, I believe you said that you had Christmas dinner with him last year.
- Yeah.
- But Dr.
Kroger is Jewish.
He doesn't celebrate Christmas, does he, Mr.
Krenshaw? His first wife, Alisha, was Jewish.
But Madeline, his fiancee, is Irish Catholic.
They celebrate both.
His fiancee? Yeah.
I introduced them.
That is a lie.
Dr.
Kroger never said anything to me about a fiancee.
Let me repeat that for you.
Dr.
Kroger never said anything to me about a fiancee.
Go to hell, Monk.
- You You can go to hell.
- You go to hell! You! You! Okay.
Thank you.
Natalie, you have 30 seconds for rebuttal.
Uh, I I don't know where Dr.
Kroger is this evening, but our prayers are with him.
- Monk, what's goin' on? - Did you see that? - See what? - That guy.
Whitman.
He got to the door, then he stopped.
He's done time.
In prison, you never open your own door.
They open them for you, and after a while, it becomes a habit.
- He must have just been released.
- Okay, so, he's done time.
Look.
He just handed me this.
Look how it's folded.
Four corners to the center, then in half, and half again.
In my whole life, I've only ever seen one piece of paper folded like this.
The sniper's note.
He's the guy.
Why? What's he after? I don't know.
But he's the guy.
Oh, yeah.
Don't you ever get tired of being right? I do feel tired.
More fatigued, really.
I don't know if it's from being right It was a rhetorical question, Monk.
You could be on to something here.
Jack Whitman.
He's been sent up twice.
First time for mail fraud and receiving stolen property.
Lately, he's been importing rugs.
Rugs? Yeah, rugs, from places like Chechnya, Uzbekistan.
Sound familiar? The shell casing and the grenade.
The Feds think that he's a major arms dealer.
They raided his office six months ago.
They came up empty-handed.
No guns, no nothing, no paper trail.
All they could get him on was tax evasion.
He did five months.
He just got out last Wednesday.
And two days later, he's on a roof taking shots at Natalie.
Then he joins her campaign, and then he tries to take you out.
What's he after? I'm not going to wait to find out.
- Let's go get him.
- Oh, I can't go.
You're on your own.
Natalie's waiting for me downstairs.
I have to go vote.
Well, that's good.
You're doing your civic duty.
There's that.
Also, if I don't vote, Natalie will You know.
Oh.
Here you go.
- You guys voting today? - No.
There's a polling place right around the corner.
So, you have no excuses.
Sure we do: We don't care.
Wow, that was weird.
I've never voted for myself before.
That was That was really weird.
But not bad-weird, good-weird.
Actually, that was kind of great-weird.
All right, let's go.
Uh, I haven't voted yet.
- What have you been doing? - I'm still signing in.
I'm almost done.
Booth number two.
- What? - It's small, huh? Yeah.
I know it is.
I really appreciate this, Mr.
Monk.
I can't do it.
I just can't.
Mr.
Monk, come on.
You know what this election means to me.
Now, you can do this.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Democracy in action.
Okay.
I got it.
Oh.
Shh.
Hello? No, sir, he can't.
He's voting.
All right, bye.
Ah, I can't I can't breathe in here.
There's no There's no air in here.
No, there's air.
You can breathe.
- Lots of air.
- Oh.
- How did it go? - I'm not notnot quite finished.
Just just gonna take a little bit of a break.
So many choices, huh? Column two.
Teeger.
Third name down: Teeger.
Okay, all right, I'm I'm going, now.
No wonder turnout is so low.
Natalie, where did you get that box? I don't know.
The The campaign office.
That was Jack Whitman's box, remember? He brought it with food in it from home.
Oh, my God, I know what Jack Whitman was after.
Have you heard if he's in custody yet? The Captain just called.
They said they can't find him.
Well, I know where he is going.
We got to call the Captain back, and tell him to meet us at the campaign headquarters.
- What's going on? - Tazarr copier.
Sound familiar? The copy machine at your campaign office used to belong to Jack Whitman.
That's what this whole thing has been about.
The copy machine? Sir! Sir, we need my car.
We're in a hurry! It's right there! Here you go! Here you go! $10.
I don't have any cash.
I was going to stop at the ATM.
Do you have any money? Do you ever have any money? Listen, this is very important.
It's a police emergency, I need my car.
Here, take my purse as collateral.
- I can't do that.
- Oh, come on! - Hey! You can't do that! - It's an emergency.
- Shawn! Shawn! - Oh, come on, give me the keys! You got to be kidding me.
- Key.
Whoa.
- Whoa.
It's keep-away.
Natalie! Natalie, stop! You You're just embarrassing yourself.
No offense, okay, but I'm comin' in.
Come on, get out of there.
Bring it.
Mr.
Monk, come on, let's just walk.
No.
There's not enough time.
Whitman is already on his way to your campaign office because the cops that were stationed there have all been sent home.
That's why Whitman was waitin' around.
Here's what happened.
Six months ago, Whitman was in his office, minding his own business, which, in his case, was buying and selling illegal weapons.
ATF! Open up! The ATF raided the office.
Whitman managed to burn all the incriminating papers he had, - except for one.
- The one in the copy machine! Exactly.
There was something jammed inside that machine.
A document, a receipt.
Whatever it was, it must be pretty important.
After he was arrested, The Feds confiscated all of his equipment, including the copy machine.
Last week, when he got out of jail, he learned that the copier had been sold at the police auction.
What the hell is he talkin' about? Who cares? The auction was open to the public, so it wasn't hard for Whitman to track you down.
He knew the document inside that copier could send him to jail for life.
Somehow, Whitman had to stop the repairman from opening it up.
He grabbed one of his guns, ran up to the roof across the street, and tried to take out the copier.
He figured if he shot it to hell, you'd just throw it out.
But you never did.
That's why he volunteered.
He was waiting for a chance to break into it.
But the cops were there around the clock.
Oh, shoot, almost had it.
And when I got suspicious, he tried to kill me with that grenade.
Damn! Ah! Okay, I give up.
Damn, you are good! Let's go! I'll be back with your money! - Whitman, touch that gun and you're dead! - Hands on your head! Hands on your head! Captain.
Captain, what is it? Looks like a client list.
It's a half a dozen names.
Delivery dates.
Stinger missiles.
Rocket-propelled grenades.
This is big.
I've got a friend at the Bureau who's been looking for this.
Let's go.
- When did you put this together? - In the voting booth.
Thank you again for doing that, Mr.
Monk.
Every vote counts.
You did vote for me, didn't you? I think so.
I don't know, it's all, you know, kind of a blur, really.
What if I lose by one vote? You didn't quit.
And for the record, it wasn't me.
I mean, you didn't lose by just one vote.
Yeah, I know.
You lost by a lot more than one vote.
- It was close to a landslide.
- Yes, I know.
Thank you, Mr.
Monk.
Are you, okay? Yeah, I feel pretty great.
We're fighters, right? - We'll be back, right? - Right.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, hey, everyone.
It's It's Harold's victory speech.
Boo! There are so many people that I I want to thank.
My secret weapon, my beautiful wife, Clarissa.
I love you, honey.
Thank you.
But most of all, I want to thank my good friend and my therapist, Dr.
Charles Kroger.
Chuck, come on.
- Chuck? - No, come on, come on.
Thank you.
God bless you.
You okay? Uh, I'd like to go home now.
All right, all right, let me just get my purse.
Come on, Mr.
Monk.
This way.
It's okay, it's okay.
I got you.
Did you hear that? He called him "Chuck.
"
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