Psych Episode Scripts

N/A - Rob-a-Bye Baby

So then this, um, guy with pliers comes in, probably with safety goggles, maybe some sort of fire retardant cover all.
He starts doing his thing, twisting and turning.
There's all sorts of fluids just spraying all over the place.
Then this hydraulic lift comes into play, wheeling everything out of there.
There you have it.
- All right? Let's clean up.
- Wait.
That's how babies are born? - Yes? - With a hydraulic lift? - More or less.
- But how are they made? Uh, Shawn, more important question, how many hats are in the room? None.
How are they made? Hats? Nowadays, I hear most of them are made in China.
- Let's go.
- Forget it.
- Maybe I'll go ask mom.
- D don't, no! No.
Wait, wait, come back here.
Come back here, come back here.
All right.
Tuck in your shirt before you talk to her.
All right, tell me exactly what she said.
- Use her words.
- She said, "hello.
This is chief Vick.
" it's a good start, Gus.
I love it when she says that.
"I have something big to talk to you about.
It's top secret.
" Come down to the station as soon as you can.
" Do you realize what this means? It means we're taking it to the next level.
She said "big" and "top secret.
" that's two of our favorite '80s movies.
I read about the international yacht bandit.
I bet you we're going undercover on a yacht.
Gus, let's not get ahead of ourselves.
She may want us to catch that guy who's been stalking lingerie models.
I know what it is.
Last night on the news, I saw something about a blimp.
- "Blimp rides".
- Shotgun.
You can't call shotgun on a blimp.
You can call shotgun anywhere except a crowded movie theater.
All right, close the blinds, shut the door, and remain completely silent.
This is big.
Look, I'm trusting you both to be professional and to keep this matter completely confidential.
- You got it.
- If you knew how many secrets I was keeping from you already, you'd totally trust me.
- It involves a nanny.
- Nanny serial killer.
- Nanny on the run? - Nanny arsonist? Does she fly a blimp, by chance? No.
I need you to hire me a nanny.
# I know you know # # that I'm not telling the truth # # I know you know # # they just don't have any proof # # embrace the deception # # learn how to bend # # your worst inhibitions # # tend to psych you out in the end # Our big case is finding you a nanny for your baby? Well, I'd be hiring you privately, of course.
But I cannot stress how important this is.
Of course.
Our children are our most precious resources.
Yes.
That.
Also, I haven't slept in weeks.
See, my nephew was nannying her.
And then he went back to nursing school.
And ever since he left, she won't fall asleep, which means that I don't fall asleep are you up for this job?! I Yeah.
Yeah, I guess.
See, I can run the background checks on the nannies.
Of course, not to mention, the drug testing, the psychological briefings.
But I want to hire you both to psychically read the best candidate.
Look, chief.
With all due respect, I think our services might be better utilized Your services are best utilized by doing exactly what I say.
You are not my first choice, Mr.
Spencer.
And I cannot stress how important this is.
I Need Sleep! All right, so, uh, while we're looking for this babysitter Nanny.
How about we also hop on board the yacht bandit case? - Because I think - Oh, no.
No, no, no.
No, no way.
If I'm hiring you privately, then this is the only case that you're going to be working on.
I mean, when you're working on police cases, it's not like you take private cases as well.
Or do you? - No.
- No.
- Of course not.
- We don't do that.
- That would be unprofessional.
- It would break the psychic/client - We wouldn't even think of it.
- Code.
Great.
You can go ahead and leave the door open.
Well, Harry, you and deeshaw start a timeline.
McNab, I want you to help Schwartz go over the witness statements.
Dobson! I want you on tactical! - Where the hell is Dobson? - Look, Gus, a real case.
What do you have? Something something Lassiter's case.
Dude, this blows with a capital z.
Shawn, this is the only case we're supposed to be working on.
Besides, it's really important.
Nannies are essential parts of today's working nuclear families.
They're babysitters who drive.
Might I remind you that this is a private case for the chief of police to find a caretaker for her child? If we screw this up, we'll be on her bad side for pretty much ever.
Gus, you're not going to find a nanny on the internet.
If they're posting there, they're already too desperate.
It's like online dating.
Remember when you went on matchmaker.
Com? You mean when you posted a profile of me without my knowledge? Right And all the women who responded were complete freaks.
That's because you said I was looking for a woman who was strong enough to hold me.
I didn't think they would take it literally.
Look, dude, all the good nannies are employed.
We gotta do some field work.
We gotta find the right nanny and steal her for chief Vick.
We should go to a playground in a really good neighborhood.
That's actually a good idea.
Plus this way, we can race on the monkey bars.
You know, Gus, we may be working the lowest stakes case of our short careers, but there's something nice about just sitting and enjoying a sunny day at the park.
Shawn, concentrate.
Look over there.
The one in the over alls.
She seems to be using reverse psychology on that ten-year-old, which is actually a pretty good idea.
- You know what's nota good idea? - What? Pineapple and movie theater popcorn flavored jelly beans.
- That's disGusting.
- Shawn, stop spitting.
You're scaring the children.
Hi.
Would you like some candy? I can't say that I blame her.
These are disGusting.
I mean, these are really horrible.
- Why can't I stop eating them? - That's it.
We're splitting up.
You're freaking out the kids.
- And me.
- Fine.
Thank you for that.
I'm serious.
I mean, I thought this was supposed to be a safe neighborhood.
Just because you're rich doesn't mean you're safe.
Marissa, get off of her now! So you know Annie, she worked for the bermans.
She had to go to the police station because they thought she might be a material witness 'cause of when the house by them got robbed.
So Dakota! Let someone else go on the slide! They spoil that little girl so hard.
So then, an Perry! Luke! I'll be sitting right here.
Remember, stranger danger! "Stranger danger.
" the parents make me say that.
Hi, I'm Shawn.
I'm, uh, I'm a manny around here.
Oh, I'm Ada.
This is Jaynie.
- Are you with an agency? - No, I don't model.
Strictly a manny.
Um, no, most of the families in this neighborhood - get their nannies from our agency.
- Oh, which one is that? Red balloon.
You should talk to them about getting reassigned.
Ada's freaking out because she doesn't feel safe - working in the heights anymore.
- Why not? Oh, gosh.
Is there a lot of crime around here? What kind? - Just some burglaries.
- Just? All these houses.
- Only three.
- Three that we've heard about.
They all happen in, like, the middle of the day, and all of them had security systems and everything, and it didn't matter.
Yeah, but it's not like it's your stuff they're stealing.
So what do you care? I don't like to be around it.
Cody! Wyoming, get your foot out of that dog! - Hi.
- Hi.
Which one is yours? Oh, uh, I'm the nanny for those two.
Oh, really.
Do they always fight like that? Pretty much.
- Which one's yours? - Oh, no kids.
Just me.
So what are your thoughts on discipline? Do you spank? - Here you go.
- Thank you.
You're welcome.
Is that your nanny right there? No.
She is.
So she doesn't always pay attention to where you are, huh? It would be pretty easy for you to get away and she wouldn't even know.
Kids.
I just want to eat 'em up.
None of these nannies will talk to me.
Even the kids are avoiding me.
Tell me the truth.
Do I smell weird? Nah, it's just the usual.
Jerk chicken and new car smell.
Look, I was talking to those two nannies, right? Oh yeah? You think they may be right for chief Vick? Nah.
They're terrible.
Yelling at the kids, gossiping.
All they paid attention to is themselves.
But here's the good news, this neighborhood is rife with crime.
See what I mean? Shawn, I think you're forgetting why we're here.
Did you really just do that? What? Hey, guys! Buzz! Listen, I got a call about two creepy dudes hanging out in the playground.
Really.
I haven't seen anything.
But I'll keep my eyes open.
Yeah, we've just been here hanging out in the bushes.
Oh, boy.
Sorry about this.
I'm so sorry.
- Hey, no hard feelings, right? - Of course not.
I mean, if you have to have a Jackie Earle Haley moment, you'd You want it to be from bad news bears.
- Maybe breaking away.
- Not little children.
Listen, I'd be happy to give you guys a ride to wherever you need to go.
Attention all officers.
We have a call on a 4-5-9 break-in at 3192 roscoe.
There.
We need to go there.
- You need to go to a crime scene? - Yeah, it's crazy.
The chief asked us to look into any new burglaries in the neighborhood while we were here - At the park.
- Okay.
Fine.
Hop in.
No.
Why you always get to sit in the front? I called shotgun.
- No, you didn't.
- Shotgun.
Chief Vick better not catch us here, Shawn.
Would you relax? She's not gonna show up at some random burglary scene.
We spent all afternoon on that nanny thing.
This is like a coffee break.
The coolest coffee break ever.
- This is so wrong, Shawn.
- That must be why it feels so good.
- We already have a case.
- Gus, we can do both.
It's called multitasking.
Okay, looks like somebody came home.
Kicked off their shoes.
Made some chamomile tea.
What ever happened to throwing back a few beers after work? Whatever happened to cleaning? This is disGusting.
Whoever broke in, managed to disarm security, find the safe and open it.
And killed a guy.
So this is where Mr.
Teatime got steeped.
That doesn't even make sense.
Got brewed? Got tea bagged! That must be what killed him.
- Good eye, Gus.
- Thank you.
So Mr.
Teatime wasn't feeling well.
He comes home early, surprises the intruder.
The murder didn't have a weapon.
Reaches for the first thing he can find.
Didn't mean to hurt anybody.
He's just a normal thief, right? Dude I bet this is connected to those robberies the nannies were talking about.
Chief Vick! Man, we gotta get out of here.
I think walking like this makes everything more exciting.
I do not think this is a good idea.
She was clear about only wanting us to find her a nanny.
Are you kidding me? I'll have a psychic vision about the whole string of robberies.
- She will love it.
- I haven't finished the report yet.
- Is your other arm in a sling? - Excuse me? I don't want excuses, Carlton.
I just want the report.
- I'm not giving excuses.
- Then why are you still talking? Head detective, my ass.
- Uh, listen, I can finish the report.
- I can do my own job, O'Hara.
- I know you - I can do my own job, O'Hara! Who finished the coffee, didn't make a fresh pot? I mean, who does that? What kind of person acts like that? Ooh, Shawn, Gus, hi! Good to see you.
Come on in.
Come on in.
- So you found me a nanny.
- Actually, we were working on that when I had a vision.
It was a robbery turned to murder.
There's a light Oh, do you know who the murder is? Unless you can name me the murder in ten seconds, then I'm not interested.
Ten, nine, one.
I hired you to find me a nanny, and that's it.
Yes, that's it.
Absolutely.
But, chief, I have this feeling.
Mr.
Spencer, I thought you understood that when I hired you, this was to be your top priority.
Your only priority.
It is.
This is it.
In fact, we even narrowed it down to the final three candidates.
Go find three candidates.
This has to be connected to the other burglaries in the heights.
Don't even think about it.
No, you go ahead.
I'm just going to say a quick hello.
Hold on a second.
I might need to make that a large.
Can I help you? You guys want to go in with me on a meat-lover's cheesy crust? No time for a pizza party, Spencer.
Nothing helps a big case more than a belly full of pepperoni.
- We're busy.
- Okay.
Keep it a medium, but yes to the crazy bread.
It makes sense that all these burglaries were connected 'cause they all have the same M.
O.
S.
Daytime burglaries Hidden valuables found and stolen.
Disabled alarm systems.
Yes.
That's what I was in the middle of saying.
- Well, then say it.
- Uh, hold on a second.
- Uh, jalapeyo poppers, cinnamon wings? - Walk away.
Thank you very much for your time.
Now if you all can just wait here for one sec Shawn, I'm glad you're here.
'Scuse me.
I'm feeling really good about these nannies.
Jean has a background in Montessori, and Sue has some interesting ideas about establishing nap time routines that I kind of like.
All right.
No.
No good.
None of them.
What? Why? Slob, psycho, slut.
I spent hours interviewing them, calling references.
And you just come in here and dismiss them in two seconds? Well, take a look, Gus.
The one on the far left is a slob.
She's smelling her own armpit.
Psycho there has been scribbling in her diary - from the moment I walked in.
- So? Maybe she's just creative? It's the same sentence over and over again.
Now, I don't know what that sentence is, but there is no configuration of words that makes that behavior acceptable.
Fine.
That still leaves Fiona.
Why is she a slut? That was more me predicting her future.
- Aw, man.
- What? All right, everybody out.
Sorry, ladies.
The position has been filled.
Don't drive angry.
- Why did you do that? - Gus, she was getting married.
So? She can still work for chief Vick.
No, she's consumed with planning her wedding.
She was studying that bridal magazine like it was a textbook.
After she's done with that, she'll be on the fertility fast track.
Then she'll have her own baby.
And chief Vick will be out another nanny.
And I do not want to have to do all this work again.
And what work exactly are you doing? How about progress on our actual case? Looks like all these robberies are inside jobs.
The key is finding the connection between the victims.
But we don't know anything about the other houses that were robbed.
All I'm saying is I'm just trying to say Don't make me slap you, Shawn.
Check it out.
I got some snapshots of the evidence.
Well, at least two of the victims have something in common.
- What? - Startek Security company.
And you don't find it strange that all four of these homes had startek security, yet none of them were secure? Actually, people get overconfident with a security system and neglect taking even the most basic precautions.
Like turning the system on, for example.
So you're saying all of these homeowners just forgot to turn on their alarms? That's one theory.
- That's a pretty flimsy theory.
- Yeah, I don't think that's what happened.
What I'm going to need from you, spock, is a list.
I just told you, yes, I am second in command.
But my name is Gary Mills.
I'm at a loss.
You'll have to talk to bones and get back to me.
Jules.
Lassie.
Why are you here? Well, I was just in the neighborhood and my ears started tingling.
And then they got pointier.
Oh, and my hand.
My hand started doing this.
All on its own.
- Like in that show.
- Star trek.
And this is startek.
Hilarious.
What's your point? Excuse me for trying to take you on a wonderful psychic journey, okay? I think there's a connection between this place and the string of robberies in the heights.
How'd you know about the robberies? I, uh, felt a burning when I sat down.
Forget I asked.
Please excuse my pseudo-colleague's presence.
Now assuming That all four of our homeowners Didn't just "forget" to turn on their systems, I think a startek employee could've gotten those access codes to break in.
You remind me of one of my professors.
Did you ever teach at devry school of technology? - No.
- Well, I had one of these professors who often had harebrain theories like yours.
If we were really gonna rob any of the houses that we monitor, we would choose one in a totally higher income bracket.
Take a look at this mansion, huh? I would Rob this bad boy so fast your head would spin.
Really.
How? - Lassiter, I don't - O'Hara, please.
What do you want, Shawn? Gus, there's no way it can be these security guys.
I mean, they want to be cops, but they're really just on domestic detail.
Really? Like you're a wannabe detective following a case we're not even on, when you should be finding chief Vick a new nanny.
I trust you to head that up, Gus.
Meanwhile, I'm going to borrow your car, check out those other houses that were robbed.
No way.
I will not have my echo be a part of your flagrant disobeying of the chief.
Use your motorcycle.
Dude, I can't do recon with that on suburban streets.
Help me find the nanny, and then I'll take you.
Gus, I'm a grown man.
I don't have to depend on others to drive me around.
- Okay? - Fine.
Ooh, slow down.
Slow down.
What are we looking for again? My kinkajou.
He's got to be around here somewhere.
Maybe he's more in the middle of the block.
- Your kinka-what? - Kinkajou.
It's a 12-inch, monkey-like mammal.
It's become quite vogue to keep as a pet.
Dermot mulroney had one named "Baby Love.
" but I named mine "Red Hot Monkey Love.
" All right, Shawn, cut the crap.
I'm only doing this 'cause you agreed to mow the lawn.
It's time to fess up.
What is really going on here? All right, fine.
There's been a string of robberies in the heights, and I need to get a closer look at one of the houses that got robbed.
Why didn't you just say so? Because it's more fun to say "kinkajou.
" All right, which one? That one.
Yeah? Well, that's a stupid house to Rob.
Does anyone live up to your standards? Maybe we can get a hold of the burglar's number.
You can call.
Tell him how disappointed you are.
Shawn, take a look at all the houses on this block.
Of all of 'em, tell me why that one would be your last choice to break into? - I don't know, dad.
I - Shawn.
Now.
Because all the other houses are easier targets than the one that actually got robbed.
Neighbor two houses down has been gone for several days.
Didn't bother to suspend their newspaper delivery.
- Good.
What else? - The house on the other side is completely hidden by those trees and bushes.
It's the perfect vantage point for a burglar.
Especially during the day time.
Not to mention our house has a security system.
And bars on the windows.
This was not a crime of chance, Shawn.
That house was chosen for a reason.
- There can only be one.
- What? I thought we were doing lines from "Highlander".
My bad.
- Let's get out of here.
- Wait.
That sensational feeling.
That is the quickening.
Everyone can do connery.
Your lambert sucks.
- At least I have a lambert.
- Hey, Ada, it's Jaynie.
They let me out early.
Want to meet up tonight? A nanny wouldn't be able to afford coach sunglasses, am I right? Well, she should be able to.
Nannies are criminally underpaid.
Right.
Because our children are our most precious resources.
Because children are maddening hellions.
A great nanny can make all the difference in the world.
Haven't you seen nanny 911? No, I'm still trying to catch up on my dog whisperers.
Nannies on there are brilliant.
I wish I had one of 'em when you were a kid.
Uh, don't beat yourself up, pop.
Sure, most of my good traits come from mom.
But you, uh No, that's really all I got.
Okay, chief.
Let me begin by saying no.
We have not found you a nanny yet.
But I have had a vision about nannies, ironically.
Rings of nannies! Uh, rings of of around my collar.
Of thieves.
Rings of thieves! Supplementing their paltry incomes as nannies.
Rogue nannies robbing their bosses' aykroyds and belushis.
Neighbors! Robbing their bosses' neighbors! Chief, if I can just get a little closer to these robberies And And And we would still find you a nanny eventually.
Oh, Mr.
Spencer.
I'm sorry.
I must've fallen asleep.
That is so creepy.
Your eyes were wide open.
Yeah.
I learned to do that back when I was on stakeouts.
I have never been so sleep-deprived in my life.
But thank goodness you found me a nanny.
N no.
No, we haven't We haven't done that yet.
- Then why are you here? - That's what I was saying.
I've got some very strong psychic rumblings about those robberies.
I gave you explicit instructions.
And you're here to tell me that you've completely disregarded everything I said? No, no, no.
Not completely.
Well, look, if you're gonna put it like that, then sort of.
Well.
Let me put it just like this.
And listen very closely.
Because I want you to get it clearly this time.
You Are Fired.
Yeah.
Ah.
From which case? All of them.
Trying to solve that case is what got us in trouble in the first place, Shawn! She said she wanted me to name the murder.
As long as I could do it in ten seconds.
And as long as it didn't distract from the nanny search.
So you find the perfect nanny before she does.
I'll find the murder for the police.
And voila, she's loving us again.
And exactly how is this plan different from what we were doing before? Because now we're renegades, dude.
It's so hardcore! Working without the chief's knowledge.
Racing against a ticking clock for her approval.
It's gonna be so much more exciting.
- Can't you feel it? - No, Shawn.
I don't feel it.
I feel depression.
I feel a series of missed payments on our rent.
That's the only thing that motivates me to think we need to fix this.
I need to get more information on those two nannies from the park.
Maybe get into that agency where they both work.
And how do you plan on doing that? It's not like you can pretend you're a nanny.
The agency does do extensive security checks on who they hire.
But not necessarily on the parents who hire them.
Come on, buddy.
What do you say? Do a little cameo onmy two dads? That show was canceled for a reason, Shawn.
I'm sorry.
You're gonna have to find someone else to co-parent with.
I was gonna let you be Greg Evigan.
I just think that startek security is a dead end Okay.
All right.
Fine.
What if I go investigate a different Yes.
I know that you are lead detective, Lassiter.
Oh, going through a tunnel.
Gotta go.
Please let me eat my frustration in peace, Shawn.
There's this dark cloud surrounding you.
It's starving your chi.
Yeah.
And down at the station, I can see a raccoon with dark circles under his eyes.
No Her eyes.
Oh, god.
It's the chief.
Chief Vick is becoming chief coon.
And she's She's lashing out at everyone.
- That's true.
- Especially Lassie.
Who in turn is taking his frustrations out on you.
Look, Jules, you gotta take your chi back.
Take it back.
And that means doing something big.
Something risky.
Something that'll help you blow this case wide open.
Marry me, Juliet.
What are your opinions on ferberizing the baby? Oh my god.
Never.
That's disGusting.
Do you have any remedies for teething pains? Two valiums.
You would give the baby valium? Oh, no.
Of course not.
Those are for me so I can deal with the crying.
I just give the baby half a valium.
Look, Jules, you don't actually have to marry me, okay? Just Just pose as my wife when we go to the red balloon nanny agency.
I need to get a better psychic vibe on a couple of their nannies.
And you need a nanny why? Two particular nannies.
I think they're behind the robberies in the heights.
So you're saying that this string of high-tech cat burglaries One that ended in murder Were caused by a couple of 19-year-old nannies? Don't be ridiculous.
Only one of them is 19.
The other one's a slightly zaftig, polish nanny in her thirties.
Shawn, I can't help you do this.
Oh no, no, no.
You wouldn't be helping me.
I would be helping you To solve the case the way you think it needs to be solved.
Jules, to get your chi back.
Investigate these nannies with me.
Otherwise your chi's going to shrivel up and starve to death.
You need to feed your chi.
Besides, I wasn't going to say anything, but I had a vision of us being married.
I know it's probably this undercover thing we're gonna do, but it might have been a vision from our future.
Mr.
And Mrs.
Juliet Spencer.
O'Hara? Fine.
I'll do it.
She said yes, everybody! She loves me so much! But only for detective Work.
I don't buy into this whole husband and kids thing.
Marriage is just a contractual obligation that the state mandated centuries ago when wives were considered property.
But if we are going to pretend This is what our wedding was like.
It's sunset on a beach in Antigua So then I walk down the aisle to an a cappella version of James Taylor's "only one.
" and by this time, the flower girls have tossed the peony petals into a soft, - butterfly formation.
- Hi.
I'll take you in to see the head of the agency now.
Hi, I'm Abby Daniels.
And it says here that you are Mr.
and Mrs.
Levon Tostig.
That's correct.
Why don't you tell me a little bit about your child.
Well, we had little millicent in a home birth with a doula.
And afterwards, Levon here buried my placenta in the backyard.
Some of our nannies are very environmentally conscious.
They're into homeopathic methods.
- Great.
- What kind of background checks do you run on these nannies? Well, I'm glad you asked that, because the safety of your children is something we pride ourselves on here at red balloon.
I like that very much.
Well, why don't I show you a little bit around our offices.
And you can see some of the services that we offer here.
Great.
So getting any psychic vibrations on your two suspects yet, Levon? I think I got thrown off picturing your placenta.
Now this is Steve Hitchcock.
He's in charge of the baby bonding cameras we install.
Part of every nanny placement package.
What are baby bonding cameras? Well, they're a series of web cams we set up in your home.
You can log on any time during the day and see how your child and the nanny are doing.
- So you're spying on them.
- Oh, no.
Not at all.
The nannies are aware these cameras are installed.
It's more to keep in touch with your child.
Not to mention having the nanny know you may be watching her at any time, it encourages her to be extra responsible.
You're the only ones with the access to the camera feed.
You sign onto the web site using a unique password only you know.
So you can see, not only do we run extensive background checks on our nannies, you can check on them whenever you like.
Ooh, uh, sweetie, why don't you tell them how we decorated little Millie's room, then they'll know how to set up the cameras.
Excuse me.
Well, we decorated with a raspberry and sage theme.
And then we did this pinstripe wallpaper that really accented the sea foam green that we had done in the crown molding.
Perfect timing, Gus.
A nanny wouldn't be able to afford coach sunglasses, am I right? Of course, I love what nate berkus did on Oprah's nursery theme week.
So I took his idea and I did the long, flowing curtains.
But only on two of the windows, even though there's four Hon, we should probably get going.
Great! Well, if you have any other questions, you just let us know.
- Thank you.
I will.
- Or e-mail.
E- mail is good too.
O'Hara.
Uh-huh.
Where? Okay, I'll be right there.
That was Lassiter.
Wants me to meet him at some exotic reptile shop on central.
Said they found some of the stolen merchandise from the robberies.
Ooh.
Can I come? I'd love to see what my wife does at work all day.
And then before every nap time, we read good night moon and the giving tree.
Those are my favorite books.
And then she lies down for a 45-minute nap, which I keep track of in my client sleep chart.
I love charts.
When can you start? All right, when'd the items come in? Jeez Louise.
Does it look like I keep records in quicken in here? Maybe tuesday.
Can you at least describe the person who sold them to you? You get used to lookin' at lizards all day, people all start to look alike.
- Was it a man or a woman? - Boy, you ask some toughies.
- I think it was a guy.
- Pasty white guy? Beatnik haircut.
Stupid grin? I don't think so.
Was he roly-poly like a puffer fish? Spencer, what the hell? - Yeah.
Yeah, he was.
- Now I'm seeing red.
Was he red-faced like a kol fish? Exactly.
And did he spit a lot like a komodo dragon? Just like a komodo.
Great! I'll take this description down to our sketch artist at the aquarium.
All right, tell me exactly which items this fish man sold.
Your vision kinda sounds like that red-faced guy from the red balloon nanny agency Steve.
I was thinking the kool-aid guy.
- But yours probably makes more sense.
- Yeah.
I'm going to head back down to the station, investigate them a little more.
See if I can get a warrant.
So it's not the nannies that are responsible for the burglaries.
- It's the agency.
- Yeah.
Gus, I'm so glad you called.
You're about to be a lot gladder.
Chief Vick has officially forgiven us.
I just found her a nanny.
Oh, that's perfect.
I think I just figured out who the bad guys are.
The best part is, she can start right away.
Her security check is already done, because she works for the best agency in town.
Oh, no.
Please don't say the Red balloon nanny agency.
This is the part I hate.
Waiting for warrants.
Oh, we're not waiting for warrants.
Can you please tell me what we're doing here? Look, Gus, we know the ws of the crime.
We know the who, we know the where.
We're pretty solid on the where of.
We're pretty sure of the where to for.
- We're scratch on the what chamacallit.
- Shawn.
- 'Cause that's self-explanatory.
- Shawn.
We don't have the how.
Why do we need to know the how if the guy's gonna be arrested? Dude, I'm the one that has to do the wrap-up, remember? You want me to get up there with eggs benedict all over my face? The Canadian bacon in my hair? Hollandaise dripping down? I needzing.
I'm a psychic.
I gotta see everything.
Come on.
Oh, hi, Levon.
What are you doing here? This is Samuel Coen.
He's my best friend and godfather to my little millicent.
Now he's, uh, very overprotective and he insisted on coming by and getting a feel for the folks that are going to be caring for his little goddaughter.
Oh, well, guys, I'm so sorry.
But Steve and Abby, they're out doing home interviews with clients.
You know what, we're okay with waiting.
Dude, she has a headache.
Start whistling something by philip glass.
Okay, you know what, guys? You don't have to wait out here.
You know, I bet you'd be more comfy in Mrs.
Daniel's office.
- You sure it's no trouble? - No, no.
Not at all.
You know where it is, right? Thank you.
- What kind of clues are we looking for? - Any kind.
- Somebody chews tobacco.
- How about some new clues? - What are you doing? - Dude, I think this thing opens up.
Scratches on both sides of the wall.
It's, like, a secret door or something.
Nicely done, Gus.
These are feeds from the baby bonding cameras that the agency installs.
It's kind of creepy.
Yeah, especially since the only ones that are supposed to be able to access these feeds are the parents themselves.
This is our proof, Shawn.
They watch the footage from the cameras, get the security codes, see where people are hiding their valuables, and case out their houses.
We got it, Shawn.
Let's go.
- Whoa! - What? No, that doesn't make any sense.
None of the houses that got robbed had nannies working in them.
Dude, it wasn't the houses with the nannies.
It was the houses next door.
Juliet's gonna have a hard time serving the warrant here at the red balloon, when the person she's trying to arrest is sitting in chief Vick's living room! Sweet black licorice.
I've got the how.
I've got to get Jules on the phone right away.
Time is of the essence here! Jules, it's Shawn.
First of all, how are you? Oh, that sounds nice.
Secondly, meet me at chief Vick's house pronto.
I've had a big vision.
Top seven of all time.
Let's go.
Thanks for getting here so quickly, guys.
- Where's your baby gift? - A what? The baby gift.
Lassie, we're about to enter the chief's home.
You can't just barge in, guns a blazing.
This is delicate.
The suspect could be holding chief Vick's baby.
Or we could make chief Vick very, very angry.
- You don't want that.
- Nobody wants that.
Probably should've given you this sooner, but, uh, happy baby gift.
Uh, thank you.
It's a mini rattle and also a low calorie breath freshener.
Oh, great.
Is there anything I can do for you guys? We just wanted to say hi.
Oh, uh, Shawn, I'm glad that you're here.
I just wanted to apologize for snapping at you the other day.
Chief, there's no need.
Really.
Oh, well, you know, I was just so mad, I just wanted to strangle you.
But I admit I was wrong.
I realized I was overreacting after I tried to run my husband over after he left the garage door open.
- But this agency that you and Gus found - Yeah, about - Mrs.
Vick! - Yeah.
I just finished up installing the cameras.
Guess who just fell asleep? - Iris is sleeping? - Like a lamb.
Please tell me that your other nannies are as good with children as you are.
Even better.
- You guys did a great job.
- Yeah.
About that Mr.
And Mrs.
Tostig.
I didn't realize you knew Mrs.
Vick.
Mr.
Softy would like to say a few words.
Oh, Shawn, I really don't think that this is the time.
I thought his name was Levon.
What's that? The bear snores really loud, he's pretty sure the turtle's really an alien, and all the monkey wants to do is play pull my finger.
Oh and somebody just put in some video cameras? Yeah, I just set up a bunch of them.
So? Well, they're not normal video cameras.
They're all high-techy with army-grade resolution.
What? What's that, Fella? Look up? That's just a fan, Silly.
Lassie, what's that? This is the extella 5400.
They're the baby bonding cameras, so you can check in.
The extella 5400 retails for over $10,000.
I'm fine.
I'm seeing angles and pivots and divots.
Well, no divots.
But it sure is fun to say those back-to-back.
Pivots and divots and pivots and divots and pivots and divots and Who wants to give that a shot? - Give what a shot? - Shots.
That's it.
Exactly.
But I don't see any shots of nannies playing with babies.
In fact, there's no babies at all.
I'm seeing jewelry boxes and safes and entrances and exits and security keypads.
But But from where? - From the houses next door.
- What are you talking about? There's a baby sleeping.
I'm talking about Shawn, will you stop! Well, it's like a mine field! I'm talking about casing out houses next door to the ones your nannies work at.
I'm talking about a string of robberies, one of which went terribly wrong when all of a sudden your witness-less crime got witnessed.
And then it became murder.
That ridiculous.
Is it as ridiculous as having a secret panel in your office where you can plan all your robberies? You had access to each and every one of those baby bonding cameras, and you manipulated them.
Not to check on any nannies, but to case the houses next door to capture security alarm codes so you could break into those houses undetected.
I'd say that's pretty ridiculous.
Though not as ridiculous as Denise Richards playing a nuclear physicist named Christmas Jones in a Bond movie.
But still.
Look, I don't know what this guy's deal is, but we gotta go.
This guy's deal is that he's a psychic.
Who happens to work for the police.
Oh, really? Yeah, really.
The Santa Barbara police department, which I'm the chief of.
Anybody ever tell you you look like a puffer fish? Sorry.
- I can't believe it all worked out.
- I know.
All I had to do was get the fruit bowl assortment from Garrett bell's Jelly Bean factory and every flavor's delicious.
I'm talking about with chief Vick.
Her nephew's transferring to a nursing school in Santa Barbara.
In two weeks, she'll have her old nanny back.
Mm, pomegranate.
I wonder what she's going to do in the meantime.
Oh, I took care of that.
You mean, after I scoured the city and couldn't find anyone, you just stumbled upon a nanny responsible enough for chief Vick? That I did.
Give me a little whoop.
Whoop.
And you gotta admit The man knows how to work a baby.
Shawn! Don't look back.
Just keep walking.
Shawn! Shawn! Where are you going? Come on, you said five minutes! Don't you dare leave! I'm smelling something really foul coming out of this thing!