Adam Ruins Everything (2015) s01e11 Episode Script
Adam Ruins Nutrition
1 Thank you, thank you.
Hi, I'm Dr.
Todd Bodd and welcome to "Doc Talk .
" Hi, I'm Dr.
Todd Bodd and welcome to "Doc Talk .
" Today, we're talking about the and welcome to "Doc Talk .
" Today, we're talking about the healing power of vitamins.
Today, we're talking about the healing power of vitamins.
This is Debbie, a volunteer healing power of vitamins.
This is Debbie, a volunteer from our audience.
This is Debbie, a volunteer from our audience.
Now, Debbie, do you take your from our audience.
Now, Debbie, do you take your vitamins? Now, Debbie, do you take your vitamins? I do.
vitamins? I do.
Good girl.
I do.
Good girl.
You're very handsome.
Good girl.
You're very handsome.
Oh! You're very handsome.
Oh! Oh, you-- Oh! Oh, you-- you can go back to your seat.
Oh, you-- you can go back to your seat.
Let's get her back.
you can go back to your seat.
Let's get her back.
Okay.
Let's get her back.
Okay.
Thank you, thank you, Debbie.
Vitamins are the key to health and perhaps the cure for the common cold.
and perhaps the cure for the common cold.
Now, how many of you have ever for the common cold.
Now, how many of you have ever heard of vitamin megadoses? Now, how many of you have ever heard of vitamin megadoses? Ooh, ooh! heard of vitamin megadoses? Ooh, ooh! I have! Ooh, ooh! I have! But I've also heard of fairies I have! But I've also heard of fairies and the Loch Ness monster, and But I've also heard of fairies and the Loch Ness monster, and those won't cure your cold and the Loch Ness monster, and those won't cure your cold either.
those won't cure your cold either.
What? either.
What? Vitamins supplements don't What? Vitamins supplements don't cure colds.
Vitamins supplements don't cure colds.
They don't prolong your life.
cure colds.
They don't prolong your life.
And in some cases, they may They don't prolong your life.
And in some cases, they may actually be harmful.
And in some cases, they may actually be harmful.
Who are you? actually be harmful.
Who are you? - Hi, I'm Adam Conover, and Who are you? - Hi, I'm Adam Conover, and this is "Adam Ruins Everything.
" - Hi, I'm Adam Conover, and this is "Adam Ruins Everything.
" We're doing kind of a this is "Adam Ruins Everything.
" We're doing kind of a show-within-the-show We're doing kind of a show-within-the-show thing here today.
show-within-the-show thing here today.
See, look.
thing here today.
See, look.
Here's my camera, See, look.
Here's my camera, there's your camera.
See? Here's my camera, there's your camera.
See? My camera, your camera.
there's your camera.
See? My camera, your camera.
Your camera is on my camera.
My camera, your camera.
Your camera is on my camera.
Ooh, so meta.
Your camera is on my camera.
Ooh, so meta.
Sorry, I've never heard of Ooh, so meta.
Sorry, I've never heard of your show.
Sorry, I've never heard of your show.
I'm a little busy with my own your show.
I'm a little busy with my own show here.
Okay, well, which would you guy rather see? His dumb show about how you guy rather see? His dumb show about how you should take your vitamins, His dumb show about how you should take your vitamins, or my show about a mad scientist should take your vitamins, or my show about a mad scientist who fooled a nation? Also, on my show, he takes his shirt off.
Yay! My show wins! he takes his shirt off.
Yay! My show wins! Closed Captions Provided by truTV So, what are vitamins? Huge pills that smell like old olives? Huge pills that smell like old olives? Wrong, anyone else? like old olives? Wrong, anyone else? Here we go.
Wrong, anyone else? Here we go.
Uh, candy that's shaped like Here we go.
Uh, candy that's shaped like cartoon characters.
Uh, candy that's shaped like cartoon characters.
Wrong again.
cartoon characters.
Wrong again.
You're both thinking Wrong again.
You're both thinking of vitamin supplements.
You're both thinking of vitamin supplements.
What are the vitamins of vitamin supplements.
What are the vitamins themselves? What are the vitamins themselves? Little bits of goop themselves? Little bits of goop that your body needs? Little bits of goop that your body needs? I love you, Todd.
that your body needs? I love you, Todd.
Exactly.
I love you, Todd.
Exactly.
They're a collection of various Exactly.
They're a collection of various micronutrients that are They're a collection of various micronutrients that are essential for your body to micronutrients that are essential for your body to function normally.
essential for your body to function normally.
Yes, so vitamins make function normally.
Yes, so vitamins make us healthy.
Yes, so vitamins make us healthy.
Except that by definition, vitamins are nutrients we only need a tiny little bit of.
And normally, we get plenty of them from the food we eat.
And normally, we get plenty of them from the food we eat.
Arr! But what if I contract scurvy? You won't.
Scurvy is caused by an extreme You won't.
Scurvy is caused by an extreme lack of vitamin C.
Scurvy is caused by an extreme lack of vitamin C.
Pirates used to get it because lack of vitamin C.
Pirates used to get it because they ate nothing but hardtack Pirates used to get it because they ate nothing but hardtack biscuits for months.
they ate nothing but hardtack biscuits for months.
But if you eat normal food in biscuits for months.
But if you eat normal food in normal quantities, But if you eat normal food in normal quantities, you'll be fine, like, normal quantities, you'll be fine, like, just eat a lemon, ever.
you'll be fine, like, just eat a lemon, ever.
Mmm.
just eat a lemon, ever.
Mmm.
I feel better already, indeed! Mmm.
I feel better already, indeed! But getting more vitamins is I feel better already, indeed! But getting more vitamins is even better! But getting more vitamins is even better! No, it isn't.
even better! No, it isn't.
Vitamins are sort of like cats.
No, it isn't.
Vitamins are sort of like cats.
If you have no cats, Vitamins are sort of like cats.
If you have no cats, you'll be lonely.
If you have no cats, you'll be lonely.
If you have a cat or two, you'll be lonely.
If you have a cat or two, you'll feel better.
If you have a cat or two, you'll feel better.
But that's enough cats.
you'll feel better.
But that's enough cats.
No one needs to load up on cats.
And just like with cats, you don't want to overdo it.
Studies show that taking too don't want to overdo it.
Studies show that taking too much of some vitamins, like A, Studies show that taking too much of some vitamins, like A, D, or E, can actually much of some vitamins, like A, D, or E, can actually make you sick.
D, or E, can actually make you sick.
Well, even if that's true, make you sick.
Well, even if that's true, megadoses of Well, even if that's true, megadoses of vitamin C will cure-- megadoses of vitamin C will cure-- Nothing.
vitamin C will cure-- Nothing.
Vitamin C does not treat or cure Nothing.
Vitamin C does not treat or cure the common cold and products Vitamin C does not treat or cure the common cold and products that claim it does are nonsense.
Remember Airborne? Sure, the cold medicine created by a schoolteacher.
Sure, the cold medicine created by a schoolteacher.
It keeps you from getting colds created by a schoolteacher.
It keeps you from getting colds from touching the magazines It keeps you from getting colds from touching the magazines on airplanes.
from touching the magazines on airplanes.
That is not true.
on airplanes.
That is not true.
Who gave you a medical license? That is not true.
Who gave you a medical license? Oprah.
Who gave you a medical license? Oprah.
Airborne is a cocktail of Oprah.
Airborne is a cocktail of plain old vitamins that was Airborne is a cocktail of plain old vitamins that was marketed as a cure for plain old vitamins that was marketed as a cure for the common cold.
But in 2006, they were sued for false advertising and ended up paying out $23 million.
false advertising and ended up paying out $23 million.
Airborne doesn't cure anything.
paying out $23 million.
Airborne doesn't cure anything.
It's basically just bubbles.
When I take vitamin C, it makes me feel better.
Yes, the placebo effect is it makes me feel better.
Yes, the placebo effect is very powerful.
Yes, the placebo effect is very powerful.
But that's all it is.
very powerful.
But that's all it is.
In reality, at least 15 But that's all it is.
In reality, at least 15 different studies have concluded In reality, at least 15 different studies have concluded that vitamin C does not treat different studies have concluded that vitamin C does not treat the common cold.
Hey, it's not my fault everyone believes vitamins are magic.
It's Linus Pauling's fault.
Great, can I go back to doing my show now? Great, can I go back to doing my show now? No, no, no, do not pan away! my show now? No, no, no, do not pan away! Come on! No, no, no, do not pan away! Come on! Linus Pauling was a genius Come on! Linus Pauling was a genius chemist and the only person in Linus Pauling was a genius chemist and the only person in history to be awarded two solo chemist and the only person in history to be awarded two solo Nobel prizes.
history to be awarded two solo Nobel prizes.
He was one of America's true Nobel prizes.
He was one of America's true scientific celebrities.
He was one of America's true scientific celebrities.
Linus, I love your chemistry! scientific celebrities.
Linus, I love your chemistry! Your research is amazing! Linus, I love your chemistry! Your research is amazing! But in the early '70s, Your research is amazing! But in the early '70s, Pauling became obsessed with But in the early '70s, Pauling became obsessed with the idea of living forever and Pauling became obsessed with the idea of living forever and basically went vitamin-crazy.
Great Neils Bohr's ghost! I've got it.
He began claiming that I've got it.
He began claiming that massive doses of vitamin C could He began claiming that massive doses of vitamin C could prevent the common cold, prolong massive doses of vitamin C could prevent the common cold, prolong your life and even cure cancer.
prevent the common cold, prolong your life and even cure cancer.
and because has was your life and even cure cancer.
and because has was a celebrity scientist, and because has was a celebrity scientist, the media trusted him.
a celebrity scientist, the media trusted him.
So these vita-pills the media trusted him.
So these vita-pills will cure my sniffles? So these vita-pills will cure my sniffles? That's right, and get this: will cure my sniffles? That's right, and get this: You'll also never get sick That's right, and get this: You'll also never get sick or die.
You'll also never get sick or die.
Sounds pretty far out.
or die.
Sounds pretty far out.
Oh, yeah.
Sounds pretty far out.
Oh, yeah.
But if the smartest cat in Oh, yeah.
But if the smartest cat in America is saying it, But if the smartest cat in America is saying it, it must be true.
America is saying it, it must be true.
Up next is Charo it must be true.
Up next is Charo and puppet superstar Madam.
Up next is Charo and puppet superstar Madam.
No, no, no, no! and puppet superstar Madam.
No, no, no, no! No, you don't.
No, no, no, no! No, you don't.
We are going back to my show.
No, you don't.
We are going back to my show.
Where is it? We are going back to my show.
Where is it? This way! But repeated studies have proven that Pauling was totally wrong.
There is no medical basis that Pauling was totally wrong.
There is no medical basis for his claims, and in 1994, There is no medical basis for his claims, and in 1994, he actually died of cancer, for his claims, and in 1994, he actually died of cancer, the very disease he claimed he actually died of cancer, the very disease he claimed vitamins would cure.
the very disease he claimed vitamins would cure.
You're telling me that vitamins would cure.
You're telling me that vitamin supplements are a lie You're telling me that vitamin supplements are a lie and we only believe in them vitamin supplements are a lie and we only believe in them because one man went crazy.
and we only believe in them because one man went crazy.
Yeah.
because one man went crazy.
Yeah.
Pauling was the Michael Jackson Yeah.
Pauling was the Michael Jackson of nutrition.
Pauling was the Michael Jackson of nutrition.
He totally changed the game.
of nutrition.
He totally changed the game.
We had no idea how crazy he was, He totally changed the game.
We had no idea how crazy he was, and 40 years later, we're still We had no idea how crazy he was, and 40 years later, we're still humming the tunes.
and 40 years later, we're still humming the tunes.
Wow.
humming the tunes.
Wow.
That's bad.
Wow.
That's bad.
It's bad.
That's bad.
It's bad.
You know it.
Um, so we shouldn't listen to experts? No, of course you should.
listen to experts? No, of course you should.
You just need to remember that No, of course you should.
You just need to remember that experts can be wrong, too, You just need to remember that experts can be wrong, too, so you still need to critically experts can be wrong, too, so you still need to critically examine ideas, even when they so you still need to critically examine ideas, even when they come from a certifiable genius, examine ideas, even when they come from a certifiable genius, or a very handsome TV show host.
come from a certifiable genius, or a very handsome TV show host.
Oh, thank you.
or a very handsome TV show host.
Oh, thank you.
Sure.
Oh, thank you.
Sure.
You too.
Sure.
You too.
All right, you've told your You too.
All right, you've told your little vitamin story.
All right, you've told your little vitamin story.
Neato.
little vitamin story.
Neato.
Now, get out of here and go ruin Neato.
Now, get out of here and go ruin Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Now, get out of here and go ruin Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Oh, that's impossible.
Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Oh, that's impossible.
They are way too likeable.
Oh, that's impossible.
They are way too likeable.
Go.
Okay, everyone, reset.
Back to one.
I don't know what that was, but it's over.
When we come back, I'll be but it's over.
When we come back, I'll be talking about the most important When we come back, I'll be talking about the most important meal of the day.
talking about the most important meal of the day.
Breakfast.
meal of the day.
Breakfast.
And I'll be talking about how Breakfast.
And I'll be talking about how everything you know about And I'll be talking about how everything you know about breakfast is wrong.
everything you know about breakfast is wrong.
We have security.
breakfast is wrong.
We have security.
How does this keep happening? Whoa! I love Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Me too.
I love Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Me too.
Well, I love that they're Me too.
Well, I love that they're part of a balanced breakfast.
Well, I love that they're part of a balanced breakfast.
Actually, they're not.
part of a balanced breakfast.
Actually, they're not.
Also, I think your refrigerator Actually, they're not.
Also, I think your refrigerator shelves are broken.
Also, I think your refrigerator shelves are broken.
I know they are.
shelves are broken.
I know they are.
I broke them.
I know they are.
I broke them.
And you're out of mayo.
I broke them.
And you're out of mayo.
What's happening? And you're out of mayo.
What's happening? Adam, just let them finish What's happening? Adam, just let them finish the commercial so we can go Adam, just let them finish the commercial so we can go back to my show.
the commercial so we can go back to my show.
Sorry, but this commercial back to my show.
Sorry, but this commercial is full of lies.
Sorry, but this commercial is full of lies.
First of all, why do these ads is full of lies.
First of all, why do these ads always have so much food? First of all, why do these ads always have so much food? Who's eating this much? always have so much food? Who's eating this much? And secondly, this "balanced Who's eating this much? And secondly, this "balanced breakfast" is anything but.
And secondly, this "balanced breakfast" is anything but.
Come on, I'll show you! breakfast" is anything but.
Come on, I'll show you! I am so sorry.
Come on, I'll show you! I am so sorry.
Let's start with O.
J.
I am so sorry.
Let's start with O.
J.
Juice commercials would have you Let's start with O.
J.
Juice commercials would have you believe that every sip comes Juice commercials would have you believe that every sip comes right from the tree.
believe that every sip comes right from the tree.
Right.
right from the tree.
Right.
Orange juice is totally natural.
Right.
Orange juice is totally natural.
Look.
Orange juice is totally natural.
Look.
There's a straw Look.
There's a straw right in the orange.
There's a straw right in the orange.
It's like I'm drinking right in the orange.
It's like I'm drinking straight from the fruit.
It's like I'm drinking straight from the fruit.
Man, you really are gullible.
straight from the fruit.
Man, you really are gullible.
Yeah? Man, you really are gullible.
Yeah? Even "not from concentrate" Yeah? Even "not from concentrate" orange juice is just as Even "not from concentrate" orange juice is just as processed as any other mass orange juice is just as processed as any other mass market food.
processed as any other mass market food.
Orange juice has an extremely market food.
Orange juice has an extremely short shelf life, so to stop it Orange juice has an extremely short shelf life, so to stop it from spoiling, manufacturers short shelf life, so to stop it from spoiling, manufacturers extract all the oxygen from spoiling, manufacturers extract all the oxygen from the juice.
extract all the oxygen from the juice.
(mechanical twriling, beeping) Oxygen removal complete.
But that process also removes all the orange flavor.
But that process also removes all the orange flavor.
It just tastes like removes all the orange flavor.
It just tastes like sweet.
It just tastes like sweet.
Right.
sweet.
Right.
So manufacturers artificially Right.
So manufacturers artificially jam it back in by using So manufacturers artificially jam it back in by using flavor packs.
jam it back in by using flavor packs.
That can't be natural.
flavor packs.
That can't be natural.
It's not.
That can't be natural.
It's not.
The taste that you know as It's not.
The taste that you know as Tropicana, Florida's Natural The taste that you know as Tropicana, Florida's Natural or Minute Maid was actually Tropicana, Florida's Natural or Minute Maid was actually designed in the same lab that or Minute Maid was actually designed in the same lab that makes perfume for Calvin Klein designed in the same lab that makes perfume for Calvin Klein and Dior.
makes perfume for Calvin Klein and Dior.
Oh, citrusy! and Dior.
Oh, citrusy! The trick is, since the flavor Oh, citrusy! The trick is, since the flavor packs are technically made The trick is, since the flavor packs are technically made of orange byproducts, packs are technically made of orange byproducts, they don't have to write of orange byproducts, they don't have to write "artificially flavored" they don't have to write "artificially flavored" on the label, but they are.
"artificially flavored" on the label, but they are.
Well, if it's all oranges, on the label, but they are.
Well, if it's all oranges, who cares? Well, if it's all oranges, who cares? Yeah.
who cares? Yeah.
Flavor packs aren't bad Yeah.
Flavor packs aren't bad for you, they're just Flavor packs aren't bad for you, they're just super interesting.
for you, they're just super interesting.
Uh-huh.
super interesting.
Uh-huh.
Well, great.
Uh-huh.
Well, great.
What's bad for you about Well, great.
What's bad for you about orange juice is the sugar.
What's bad for you about orange juice is the sugar.
What sugar? orange juice is the sugar.
What sugar? Kind of a strong reaction.
What sugar? Kind of a strong reaction.
You didn't know this? Kind of a strong reaction.
You didn't know this? O.
J.
is loaded with it.
You didn't know this? O.
J.
is loaded with it.
An eight-ounce glass of O.
J.
is loaded with it.
An eight-ounce glass of Tropicana contains 22 grams An eight-ounce glass of Tropicana contains 22 grams of sugar.
Tropicana contains 22 grams of sugar.
That's almost as much as a of sugar.
That's almost as much as a Pepsi, which makes sense, since That's almost as much as a Pepsi, which makes sense, since Tropicana is owned by Pepsi.
Pepsi, which makes sense, since Tropicana is owned by Pepsi.
Really? Tropicana is owned by Pepsi.
Really? Oh, man.
Really? Oh, man.
Network says I'm fired if Oh, man.
Network says I'm fired if I can't keep my weight down.
It's milk for me.
Does a body good.
Where'd you hear that? Does a body good.
Where'd you hear that? TV? Where'd you hear that? TV? Ah, more empty advertising.
TV? Ah, more empty advertising.
Come on! Ah, more empty advertising.
Come on! You mean all those fun milk Come on! You mean all those fun milk PSAs from the '90s? You mean all those fun milk PSAs from the '90s? Those weren't ads.
PSAs from the '90s? Those weren't ads.
They were trying Those weren't ads.
They were trying to keep us healthy.
They were trying to keep us healthy.
Sorry, Todd.
to keep us healthy.
Sorry, Todd.
But those PSAs were just Sorry, Todd.
But those PSAs were just for-profit marketing paid for But those PSAs were just for-profit marketing paid for by the dairy industry.
for-profit marketing paid for by the dairy industry.
Milk's got stuff that's good by the dairy industry.
Milk's got stuff that's good for my bones and stuff that's Milk's got stuff that's good for my bones and stuff that's good for my muscles.
for my bones and stuff that's good for my muscles.
Strong bones, beautiful skin good for my muscles.
Strong bones, beautiful skin and a healthy body.
Strong bones, beautiful skin and a healthy body.
All that protein for muscle, and a healthy body.
All that protein for muscle, and calcium for bones.
All that protein for muscle, and calcium for bones.
We've been fed claims like and calcium for bones.
We've been fed claims like these ever since we were kids, We've been fed claims like these ever since we were kids, but none of them are true.
these ever since we were kids, but none of them are true.
Repeated research has shown but none of them are true.
Repeated research has shown that milk does not help you Repeated research has shown that milk does not help you build strong bones.
that milk does not help you build strong bones.
In fact, one study found that build strong bones.
In fact, one study found that people who drink a lot of milk In fact, one study found that people who drink a lot of milk are at a higher rate people who drink a lot of milk are at a higher rate of bone fracture.
are at a higher rate of bone fracture.
Okay, but we need milk of bone fracture.
Okay, but we need milk for calcium.
You know, there's calcium everywhere.
Gram for gram, most dried herbs there's calcium everywhere.
Gram for gram, most dried herbs have more calcium than milk.
Oh, hey, it's Alissa Hamilton, and she's a journalist who's written extensively and she's a journalist who's written extensively about the orange juice who's written extensively about the orange juice and dairy industries.
about the orange juice and dairy industries.
Milk is not the wonder food and dairy industries.
Milk is not the wonder food that we once thought it was.
A glass of plain milk has 13 grams of naturally occurring sugar.
More sugar? I hate sugar! We've been told our entire I hate sugar! We've been told our entire lives that milk is some kind of We've been told our entire lives that milk is some kind of nutritional necessity, lives that milk is some kind of nutritional necessity, but it's not.
nutritional necessity, but it's not.
It's just another product being but it's not.
It's just another product being marketed like any other.
It's just another product being marketed like any other.
What are we supposed marketed like any other.
What are we supposed to put on our cereal, then? What are we supposed to put on our cereal, then? Water? to put on our cereal, then? Water? Ugh! Water? Ugh! Maybe it's time we let go Ugh! Maybe it's time we let go of cereal, too.
What? But we love our Honey Toasted Crunchies.
But we love our Honey Toasted Crunchies.
I'm very difficult to handle Honey Toasted Crunchies.
I'm very difficult to handle if I don't get my Crunchies.
I'm very difficult to handle if I don't get my Crunchies.
Well, what if I told you if I don't get my Crunchies.
Well, what if I told you that cereal was invented by Well, what if I told you that cereal was invented by sex-hating religious zealots? that cereal was invented by sex-hating religious zealots? Jeez, man, my kid's here.
sex-hating religious zealots? Jeez, man, my kid's here.
Oh, never too young to learn.
Jeez, man, my kid's here.
Oh, never too young to learn.
Breakfast cereal as we know it Oh, never too young to learn.
Breakfast cereal as we know it was invented by a man named Breakfast cereal as we know it was invented by a man named John Harvey Kellogg, was invented by a man named John Harvey Kellogg, and if you saw John Harvey Kellogg, and if you saw our sex episode and if you saw our sex episode He didn't.
our sex episode He didn't.
You'll remember that he was He didn't.
You'll remember that he was a real weirdo.
You'll remember that he was a real weirdo.
Masturbation causes insanity, a real weirdo.
Masturbation causes insanity, and circumcision is the cure.
Masturbation causes insanity, and circumcision is the cure.
Gah! and circumcision is the cure.
Gah! The other cure, a delicious Gah! The other cure, a delicious bowl of Dr.
Kellogg's granula.
The other cure, a delicious bowl of Dr.
Kellogg's granula.
It preserves your sperm bowl of Dr.
Kellogg's granula.
It preserves your sperm for strength.
It preserves your sperm for strength.
Why does he think those two for strength.
Why does he think those two things are related? Why does he think those two things are related? Well, he was following things are related? Well, he was following the teachings of an evangelical Well, he was following the teachings of an evangelical minister named Sylvester Graham, the teachings of an evangelical minister named Sylvester Graham, who believed that sugar minister named Sylvester Graham, who believed that sugar and spice were tools of Satan.
who believed that sugar and spice were tools of Satan.
Spicy rich foods lead and spice were tools of Satan.
Spicy rich foods lead to impure thoughts Spicy rich foods lead to impure thoughts and sinful deeds! to impure thoughts and sinful deeds! They inspire thoughts of and sinful deeds! They inspire thoughts of sex and the devil.
They inspire thoughts of sex and the devil.
A sexy devil, like Elvira! sex and the devil.
A sexy devil, like Elvira! To remain sane and pure, A sexy devil, like Elvira! To remain sane and pure, eat my newest creation, To remain sane and pure, eat my newest creation, the graham cracker! eat my newest creation, the graham cracker! Ooh, I love graham crackers.
the graham cracker! Ooh, I love graham crackers.
You might not like Ooh, I love graham crackers.
You might not like this one, though.
You might not like this one, though.
Is that a snack this one, though.
Is that a snack or a punishment? Is that a snack or a punishment? Yeah, the original foods or a punishment? Yeah, the original foods these guys invented were Yeah, the original foods these guys invented were practically inedible, these guys invented were practically inedible, and that was that point.
practically inedible, and that was that point.
Eating hard flaked wheat lets and that was that point.
Eating hard flaked wheat lets God know you hate pleasure.
Eating hard flaked wheat lets God know you hate pleasure.
It's what you deserve, God know you hate pleasure.
It's what you deserve, you sexy sinner! It's what you deserve, you sexy sinner! Despite their weird ideas, you sexy sinner! Despite their weird ideas, Kellogg's cereal and graham Despite their weird ideas, Kellogg's cereal and graham crackers were actually a lot Kellogg's cereal and graham crackers were actually a lot healthier than what most people crackers were actually a lot healthier than what most people ate back then, healthier than what most people ate back then, but a century later, we filled ate back then, but a century later, we filled them both with sugar.
but a century later, we filled them both with sugar.
Sugar? them both with sugar.
Sugar? Mm-hmm.
Sugar? Mm-hmm.
Sugar! If you gave a bowl of today's cereal to Kellogg or Graham, they would be horrified.
cereal to Kellogg or Graham, they would be horrified.
Blasphemy! they would be horrified.
Blasphemy! These will inspire Blasphemy! These will inspire lustful thoughts.
These will inspire lustful thoughts.
They smell so sweet and sugary.
lustful thoughts.
They smell so sweet and sugary.
The scent goes straight They smell so sweet and sugary.
The scent goes straight to my member! The scent goes straight to my member! Guys, it doesn't really to my member! Guys, it doesn't really work that way.
Guys, it doesn't really work that way.
You make your own truth, work that way.
You make your own truth, I guess.
Okay, so what should we eat for breakfast, then? Oh, well, I eat oatmeal for breakfast, then? Oh, well, I eat oatmeal with soy sauce on it.
Oh, well, I eat oatmeal with soy sauce on it.
What? with soy sauce on it.
What? It's good.
What? It's good.
Look, eat whatever you like.
It's good.
Look, eat whatever you like.
Just forget all this marketing Look, eat whatever you like.
Just forget all this marketing and think outside Just forget all this marketing and think outside the cereal box.
and think outside the cereal box.
Wow, we've learned the cereal box.
Wow, we've learned a lot today.
Wow, we've learned a lot today.
But we better a lot today.
But we better get back to my show.
But we better get back to my show.
This commercial break get back to my show.
This commercial break has taken forever.
This commercial break has taken forever.
Well, wait.
has taken forever.
Well, wait.
What happens to us? Well, wait.
What happens to us? Oh, you're not real.
What happens to us? Oh, you're not real.
You're just a commercial family.
Oh, you're not real.
You're just a commercial family.
Bye! You're just a commercial family.
Bye! No.
Bye! No.
No, I work at Office? Mommy? Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Part of an unbalanced breakfast.
Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Part of an unbalanced breakfast.
And we're back.
Part of an unbalanced breakfast.
And we're back.
We have to go back And we're back.
We have to go back to break already? We have to go back to break already? Well, stay tuned, 'cause when we to break already? Well, stay tuned, 'cause when we come back, I'll be telling you Well, stay tuned, 'cause when we come back, I'll be telling you how eating chocolate can come back, I'll be telling you how eating chocolate can actually help you lose weight.
how eating chocolate can actually help you lose weight.
And I'll be explaining how actually help you lose weight.
And I'll be explaining how medical shows like this one end And I'll be explaining how medical shows like this one end up telling you big fat medical shows like this one end up telling you big fat lies like that.
up telling you big fat lies like that.
Why is nobody stopping this? lies like that.
Why is nobody stopping this? I locked the doors Why is nobody stopping this? I locked the doors from the outside.
I locked the doors from the outside.
No one can get in.
Sorry about all the unexpected interruptions earlier, but now, I'm gonna tell the unexpected interruptions earlier, but now, I'm gonna tell you about a remarkable new diet earlier, but now, I'm gonna tell you about a remarkable new diet tip, and this one really works.
you about a remarkable new diet tip, and this one really works.
Are you sure about that? tip, and this one really works.
Are you sure about that? You have a "remarkable new diet Are you sure about that? You have a "remarkable new diet tip that really works" You have a "remarkable new diet tip that really works" on every show.
tip that really works" on every show.
Uh, yeah.
on every show.
Uh, yeah.
There was a scientific study Uh, yeah.
There was a scientific study done on it, so I'm pretty sure There was a scientific study done on it, so I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.
done on it, so I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.
Plus, I have a TV show.
Yeah, just because you have a TV show doesn't mean you can't be wrong.
a TV show doesn't mean you can't be wrong.
Heck, my show is fact-checked you can't be wrong.
Heck, my show is fact-checked and I could be wrong.
That's why I put my sources on screen, so that people can check my work.
on screen, so that people can check my work.
Do you do that? can check my work.
Do you do that? No, but I just know Do you do that? No, but I just know I'm right about this one.
No, but I just know I'm right about this one.
Okay.
I'm right about this one.
Okay.
My next guest discovered that Okay.
My next guest discovered that adding chocolate to your diet My next guest discovered that adding chocolate to your diet can actually help you adding chocolate to your diet can actually help you lose weight.
can actually help you lose weight.
I knew it.
lose weight.
I knew it.
Please welcome John Bohannon.
This man is a fraud.
Adam, no he's not, he's my guest.
Adam, no he's not, he's my guest.
I'm sorry, John.
he's my guest.
I'm sorry, John.
No, no, I am a fraud man.
I purposefully did a fraudulent study about the health benefits of chocolate and I convinced study about the health benefits of chocolate and I convinced the media that eating chocolate of chocolate and I convinced the media that eating chocolate helps you lose weight.
the media that eating chocolate helps you lose weight.
Why would you do that? helps you lose weight.
Why would you do that? Because nutritious science Why would you do that? Because nutritious science is totally broken and I wanted Because nutritious science is totally broken and I wanted to show that it's actually very is totally broken and I wanted to show that it's actually very easy to fool the media into to show that it's actually very easy to fool the media into making those big headlines that easy to fool the media into making those big headlines that cause those crazy diet fads making those big headlines that cause those crazy diet fads in the first place.
cause those crazy diet fads in the first place.
God, I love your work.
in the first place.
God, I love your work.
Likewise.
God, I love your work.
Likewise.
Which brings us to our next Likewise.
Which brings us to our next segment, Cooking Up a Fraudulent Which brings us to our next segment, Cooking Up a Fraudulent Study With Chefs Adam and John.
So, John, tell us.
How do you bake this terrible cake? How do you bake this terrible cake? It's a recipe this terrible cake? It's a recipe with four steps.
It's a recipe with four steps.
First, you have to take a with four steps.
First, you have to take a really skewed sample rather First, you have to take a really skewed sample rather than a properly balanced one.
really skewed sample rather than a properly balanced one.
Okay, so I'll take a little than a properly balanced one.
Okay, so I'll take a little bit of this, and this, Okay, so I'll take a little bit of this, and this, and some of these.
bit of this, and this, and some of these.
And ooh, this wouldn't make and some of these.
And ooh, this wouldn't make any sense in here.
And ooh, this wouldn't make any sense in here.
Yeah.
any sense in here.
Yeah.
Next, you need to cherry-pick Yeah.
Next, you need to cherry-pick your data, taking the stuff that Next, you need to cherry-pick your data, taking the stuff that supports what you're interested your data, taking the stuff that supports what you're interested in and throwing out the rest.
supports what you're interested in and throwing out the rest.
Okay, so, like, this one in and throwing out the rest.
Okay, so, like, this one supports my claims and this one.
Okay, so, like, this one supports my claims and this one.
And this one here.
supports my claims and this one.
And this one here.
But the rest of these, And this one here.
But the rest of these, I can just throw away.
But the rest of these, I can just throw away.
Wow, that's so easy! I can just throw away.
Wow, that's so easy! Third, you need to get it Wow, that's so easy! Third, you need to get it published in a shady journal Third, you need to get it published in a shady journal with no academic standards.
published in a shady journal with no academic standards.
Oh, we have one with no academic standards.
Oh, we have one right over here.
Oh, we have one right over here.
But it has to have a sciencey right over here.
But it has to have a sciencey name, like, the International But it has to have a sciencey name, like, the International Archives of Medicine.
name, like, the International Archives of Medicine.
What's great about journals Archives of Medicine.
What's great about journals like this is they'll take What's great about journals like this is they'll take any garbage you give 'em.
like this is they'll take any garbage you give 'em.
Don't the science journals any garbage you give 'em.
Don't the science journals have to make sure that Don't the science journals have to make sure that the papers are actually, have to make sure that the papers are actually, like, scientific? the papers are actually, like, scientific? Well, for most journals, yes, like, scientific? Well, for most journals, yes, but there are journals that are Well, for most journals, yes, but there are journals that are just out to make a buck and but there are journals that are just out to make a buck and they'll publish anything you just out to make a buck and they'll publish anything you send them as long as you pay up.
they'll publish anything you send them as long as you pay up.
Before the show, we did get a send them as long as you pay up.
Before the show, we did get a paper published.
Before the show, we did get a paper published.
Oh, look at this.
paper published.
Oh, look at this.
Look at how beautiful this is.
Oh, look at this.
Look at how beautiful this is.
It's called "The Possible Look at how beautiful this is.
It's called "The Possible Irritating Effects of It's called "The Possible Irritating Effects of Nutritional Facts" and it was Irritating Effects of Nutritional Facts" and it was published in Advances in Nutritional Facts" and it was published in Advances in Nutrition and Food Technology.
published in Advances in Nutrition and Food Technology.
What's in it? Nutrition and Food Technology.
What's in it? Oh, nothing.
What's in it? Oh, nothing.
It's just the script Oh, nothing.
It's just the script to this episode.
It's just the script to this episode.
It's not even a scientific to this episode.
It's not even a scientific paper, but because we paid the It's not even a scientific paper, but because we paid the journal $369, they published it verbatim and now we can cite it like any other source.
Isn't that fun? Look at that.
Isn't that fun? Look at that.
A script of the episode? Look at that.
A script of the episode? Am I on acid? A script of the episode? Am I on acid? No, you're on TV.
Am I on acid? No, you're on TV.
(ding) No, you're on TV.
(ding) Oh, it's ready.
(ding) Oh, it's ready.
Oh, my, John.
Oh, it's ready.
Oh, my, John.
Look at this, this is beautiful.
Oh, my, John.
Look at this, this is beautiful.
Look at how deliciously Look at this, this is beautiful.
Look at how deliciously unscientific that is.
Look at how deliciously unscientific that is.
You know, but it does still seem unscientific that is.
You know, but it does still seem like it's missing something.
You know, but it does still seem like it's missing something.
That's right.
like it's missing something.
That's right.
Because that brings us That's right.
Because that brings us to the fourth step.
Because that brings us to the fourth step.
You need to put out a press to the fourth step.
You need to put out a press release with exaggerated You need to put out a press release with exaggerated language to tantalize release with exaggerated language to tantalize the journalists.
language to tantalize the journalists.
Who could resist this? the journalists.
Who could resist this? So sugary and delicious.
Who could resist this? So sugary and delicious.
Voila.
So sugary and delicious.
Voila.
You've got a piping hot Voila.
You've got a piping hot pan of garbage.
You've got a piping hot pan of garbage.
Ooh, a delicious new study.
pan of garbage.
Ooh, a delicious new study.
Ooh, so sharable.
Ooh, a delicious new study.
Ooh, so sharable.
Yes, please.
Ooh, so sharable.
Yes, please.
Oh, that is disgusting.
Yes, please.
Oh, that is disgusting.
Reporters are hungry for Oh, that is disgusting.
Reporters are hungry for content and they're more than Reporters are hungry for content and they're more than willing to gobble up even faulty content and they're more than willing to gobble up even faulty science, and in the case of my willing to gobble up even faulty science, and in the case of my study, which had totally science, and in the case of my study, which had totally unfounded claims, they covered study, which had totally unfounded claims, they covered it all over the world.
unfounded claims, they covered it all over the world.
And this pattern is repeated it all over the world.
And this pattern is repeated in the media every day.
And this pattern is repeated in the media every day.
Press-hungry researchers get bad in the media every day.
Press-hungry researchers get bad science published in Press-hungry researchers get bad science published in disreputable journals and shows science published in disreputable journals and shows like yours peddle it disreputable journals and shows like yours peddle it to people like these.
like yours peddle it to people like these.
But the fact is, most of the to people like these.
But the fact is, most of the nutrition science reported on in But the fact is, most of the nutrition science reported on in the media isn't science at all.
My God.
Ancient melons? Ph balance water? Ancient melons? Ph balance water? Acai berries? Ph balance water? Acai berries? None of it's real? Acai berries? None of it's real? None of it.
None of it's real? None of it.
You lied to us, None of it.
You lied to us, Dr.
Todd! You lied to us, Dr.
Todd! You told us to try oil pulling! Dr.
Todd! You told us to try oil pulling! I have been eating green You told us to try oil pulling! I have been eating green coffee beans for a year I have been eating green coffee beans for a year because of you.
coffee beans for a year because of you.
I haven't slept in weeks! because of you.
I haven't slept in weeks! Are your abs even real? I haven't slept in weeks! Are your abs even real? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Are your abs even real? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Come on.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Come on.
Adam, man.
Come on.
Adam, man.
Just tell them the surprising Adam, man.
Just tell them the surprising new fact about how it isn't Just tell them the surprising new fact about how it isn't really my fault! new fact about how it isn't really my fault! Sorry, it is.
really my fault! Sorry, it is.
Shows like yours give bad Sorry, it is.
Shows like yours give bad medical advice, mislead people Shows like yours give bad medical advice, mislead people and convince them of dangerous medical advice, mislead people and convince them of dangerous pseudo science just to sell ads.
and convince them of dangerous pseudo science just to sell ads.
That's not just being pseudo science just to sell ads.
That's not just being a bad doctor.
That's not just being a bad doctor.
That's being a bad person.
a bad doctor.
That's being a bad person.
Let's burn this place That's being a bad person.
Let's burn this place to the ground! Let's burn this place to the ground! Yeah! to the ground! Yeah! Oh, that was too convincing.
Yeah! Oh, that was too convincing.
I do not know my own strength.
No, everyone, stop! There's an answer to all of this! There's an answer to all of this! And I'll tell you about it to all of this! And I'll tell you about it in just a And I'll tell you about it in just a Uh-oh.
Why did we do a pitchfork giveaway? I'm gonna lose my show and have a pitchfork giveaway? I'm gonna lose my show and have to go back to stripping! I'm gonna lose my show and have to go back to stripping! Everybody, calm down! to go back to stripping! Everybody, calm down! No! Everybody, calm down! No! Not until Dr.
Todd No! Not until Dr.
Todd tells us the truth! Not until Dr.
Todd tells us the truth! You have to tell me tells us the truth! You have to tell me what to eat! You have to tell me what to eat! How am I supposed to know what to eat! How am I supposed to know what to eat? How am I supposed to know what to eat? I don't know! what to eat? I don't know! I'm a fraud! I don't know! I'm a fraud! Guys, you just have I'm a fraud! Guys, you just have to use common sense.
Guys, you just have to use common sense.
Instead of listening to the TV to use common sense.
Instead of listening to the TV or advertisers, listen to your Instead of listening to the TV or advertisers, listen to your doctor, your real doctor.
or advertisers, listen to your doctor, your real doctor.
Debbie.
doctor, your real doctor.
Debbie.
It's Debbie, right? Debbie.
It's Debbie, right? Yeah.
It's Debbie, right? Yeah.
Before you started watching Yeah.
Before you started watching this show, didn't you have Before you started watching this show, didn't you have your own doctor who gave you this show, didn't you have your own doctor who gave you informed advice? your own doctor who gave you informed advice? Oh, yeah.
informed advice? Oh, yeah.
Dr.
Thompson.
Oh, yeah.
Dr.
Thompson.
He had, like, a regular face Dr.
Thompson.
He had, like, a regular face and no TV show, but I liked him.
He had, like, a regular face and no TV show, but I liked him.
I miss him.
and no TV show, but I liked him.
I miss him.
I miss you too, Debbie.
Dr.
Thompson? I'd like to do some blood work.
I'd like to do some blood work.
And if you'd let me, some blood work.
And if you'd let me, listen to your heart.
You had me at blood work.
I think they're gonna be really healthy together.
And on top of that, each of us really healthy together.
And on top of that, each of us already has the best tool And on top of that, each of us already has the best tool available for tracking health.
already has the best tool available for tracking health.
FitBit? available for tracking health.
FitBit? An Apple Watch? FitBit? An Apple Watch? Whatever it is, I will buy it.
An Apple Watch? Whatever it is, I will buy it.
No, I'm talking about Whatever it is, I will buy it.
No, I'm talking about your body.
No, I'm talking about your body.
Please welcome our last guest, your body.
Please welcome our last guest, your body! Oh! No, this is a nightmare! No.
No, this is a nightmare! No.
A great first step in being No.
A great first step in being healthy is to listen A great first step in being healthy is to listen to your body.
healthy is to listen to your body.
When you eat something bad, to your body.
When you eat something bad, you'll know, When you eat something bad, you'll know, 'cause you'll feel bad.
you'll know, 'cause you'll feel bad.
When you eat something good 'cause you'll feel bad.
When you eat something good and exercise, you'll feel good.
When you eat something good and exercise, you'll feel good.
All you have to do is pay and exercise, you'll feel good.
All you have to do is pay attention to what All you have to do is pay attention to what your body says.
attention to what your body says.
I like grapes! your body says.
I like grapes! See? I like grapes! See? You just learned See? You just learned you like grapes.
You just learned you like grapes.
Make it stop.
you like grapes.
Make it stop.
Oh, come on.
Make it stop.
Oh, come on.
Love your body! Oh, come on.
Love your body! No! Love your body! No! Sorry, body.
No! Sorry, body.
I guess he's not ready.
How are you doing this? Low budget green screen, I think? Low budget green screen, I think? Look, you don't have I think? Look, you don't have to eat perfectly.
Look, you don't have to eat perfectly.
Lord knows I don't.
to eat perfectly.
Lord knows I don't.
Just eat in moderation, Lord knows I don't.
Just eat in moderation, healthy food whenever you can Just eat in moderation, healthy food whenever you can and get some exercise.
healthy food whenever you can and get some exercise.
That's all you need.
and get some exercise.
That's all you need.
That makes sense, but how am That's all you need.
That makes sense, but how am I supposed to make a show That makes sense, but how am I supposed to make a show of that every day? I supposed to make a show of that every day? I don't know.
of that every day? I don't know.
Oprah added a book club, I don't know.
Oprah added a book club, you'll think of something.
You're right.
I got into this 'cause I wanted to help people, not just have I got into this 'cause I wanted to help people, not just have my own line of teeth whitening to help people, not just have my own line of teeth whitening strips, and I did it because my own line of teeth whitening strips, and I did it because I loved medicine.
strips, and I did it because I loved medicine.
I guess I just got lost I loved medicine.
I guess I just got lost somewhere along the way.
I guess I just got lost somewhere along the way.
You know somewhere along the way.
You know my name's not even Todd.
You know my name's not even Todd.
It's Rodney.
my name's not even Todd.
It's Rodney.
Rod Bodd? It's Rodney.
Rod Bodd? Yeah.
Rod Bodd? Yeah.
It wasn't catchy enough Yeah.
It wasn't catchy enough for television.
I'm gonna do it, Adam.
I'm gonna do a show based on real medical science, I'm gonna do a show based on real medical science, not puffery or flimflam.
That sounds great, Rod.
I'm sure it'll be a big hit.
(crow cawing) (meowing) Oh.
Hey, are you wearing those Shape Up shoes? Hey, are you wearing those Shape Up shoes? Yeah, toning my butt.
Shape Up shoes? Yeah, toning my butt.
You know they don't Yeah, toning my butt.
You know they don't work at all.
You know they don't work at all.
Sketchers was actually hit with work at all.
Sketchers was actually hit with a class-action lawsuit Sketchers was actually hit with a class-action lawsuit over them.
a class-action lawsuit over them.
They ended up shelling out over them.
They ended up shelling out over $40 million.
They ended up shelling out over $40 million.
Wait, all these do is make me over $40 million.
Wait, all these do is make me look weird? Wait, all these do is make me look weird? That's bull (bleep)! Oh, with all due respect, you also don't have a head, so.
Well, what are you saying? you also don't have a head, so.
Well, what are you saying? Nothing.
Well, what are you saying? Nothing.
Forget it.
Nothing.
Forget it.
Jeez.
Forget it.
Jeez.
You really gotta watch what you Jeez.
You really gotta watch what you say around this guy.
Hi, I'm Dr.
Todd Bodd and welcome to "Doc Talk .
" Hi, I'm Dr.
Todd Bodd and welcome to "Doc Talk .
" Today, we're talking about the and welcome to "Doc Talk .
" Today, we're talking about the healing power of vitamins.
Today, we're talking about the healing power of vitamins.
This is Debbie, a volunteer healing power of vitamins.
This is Debbie, a volunteer from our audience.
This is Debbie, a volunteer from our audience.
Now, Debbie, do you take your from our audience.
Now, Debbie, do you take your vitamins? Now, Debbie, do you take your vitamins? I do.
vitamins? I do.
Good girl.
I do.
Good girl.
You're very handsome.
Good girl.
You're very handsome.
Oh! You're very handsome.
Oh! Oh, you-- Oh! Oh, you-- you can go back to your seat.
Oh, you-- you can go back to your seat.
Let's get her back.
you can go back to your seat.
Let's get her back.
Okay.
Let's get her back.
Okay.
Thank you, thank you, Debbie.
Vitamins are the key to health and perhaps the cure for the common cold.
and perhaps the cure for the common cold.
Now, how many of you have ever for the common cold.
Now, how many of you have ever heard of vitamin megadoses? Now, how many of you have ever heard of vitamin megadoses? Ooh, ooh! heard of vitamin megadoses? Ooh, ooh! I have! Ooh, ooh! I have! But I've also heard of fairies I have! But I've also heard of fairies and the Loch Ness monster, and But I've also heard of fairies and the Loch Ness monster, and those won't cure your cold and the Loch Ness monster, and those won't cure your cold either.
those won't cure your cold either.
What? either.
What? Vitamins supplements don't What? Vitamins supplements don't cure colds.
Vitamins supplements don't cure colds.
They don't prolong your life.
cure colds.
They don't prolong your life.
And in some cases, they may They don't prolong your life.
And in some cases, they may actually be harmful.
And in some cases, they may actually be harmful.
Who are you? actually be harmful.
Who are you? - Hi, I'm Adam Conover, and Who are you? - Hi, I'm Adam Conover, and this is "Adam Ruins Everything.
" - Hi, I'm Adam Conover, and this is "Adam Ruins Everything.
" We're doing kind of a this is "Adam Ruins Everything.
" We're doing kind of a show-within-the-show We're doing kind of a show-within-the-show thing here today.
show-within-the-show thing here today.
See, look.
thing here today.
See, look.
Here's my camera, See, look.
Here's my camera, there's your camera.
See? Here's my camera, there's your camera.
See? My camera, your camera.
there's your camera.
See? My camera, your camera.
Your camera is on my camera.
My camera, your camera.
Your camera is on my camera.
Ooh, so meta.
Your camera is on my camera.
Ooh, so meta.
Sorry, I've never heard of Ooh, so meta.
Sorry, I've never heard of your show.
Sorry, I've never heard of your show.
I'm a little busy with my own your show.
I'm a little busy with my own show here.
Okay, well, which would you guy rather see? His dumb show about how you guy rather see? His dumb show about how you should take your vitamins, His dumb show about how you should take your vitamins, or my show about a mad scientist should take your vitamins, or my show about a mad scientist who fooled a nation? Also, on my show, he takes his shirt off.
Yay! My show wins! he takes his shirt off.
Yay! My show wins! Closed Captions Provided by truTV So, what are vitamins? Huge pills that smell like old olives? Huge pills that smell like old olives? Wrong, anyone else? like old olives? Wrong, anyone else? Here we go.
Wrong, anyone else? Here we go.
Uh, candy that's shaped like Here we go.
Uh, candy that's shaped like cartoon characters.
Uh, candy that's shaped like cartoon characters.
Wrong again.
cartoon characters.
Wrong again.
You're both thinking Wrong again.
You're both thinking of vitamin supplements.
You're both thinking of vitamin supplements.
What are the vitamins of vitamin supplements.
What are the vitamins themselves? What are the vitamins themselves? Little bits of goop themselves? Little bits of goop that your body needs? Little bits of goop that your body needs? I love you, Todd.
that your body needs? I love you, Todd.
Exactly.
I love you, Todd.
Exactly.
They're a collection of various Exactly.
They're a collection of various micronutrients that are They're a collection of various micronutrients that are essential for your body to micronutrients that are essential for your body to function normally.
essential for your body to function normally.
Yes, so vitamins make function normally.
Yes, so vitamins make us healthy.
Yes, so vitamins make us healthy.
Except that by definition, vitamins are nutrients we only need a tiny little bit of.
And normally, we get plenty of them from the food we eat.
And normally, we get plenty of them from the food we eat.
Arr! But what if I contract scurvy? You won't.
Scurvy is caused by an extreme You won't.
Scurvy is caused by an extreme lack of vitamin C.
Scurvy is caused by an extreme lack of vitamin C.
Pirates used to get it because lack of vitamin C.
Pirates used to get it because they ate nothing but hardtack Pirates used to get it because they ate nothing but hardtack biscuits for months.
they ate nothing but hardtack biscuits for months.
But if you eat normal food in biscuits for months.
But if you eat normal food in normal quantities, But if you eat normal food in normal quantities, you'll be fine, like, normal quantities, you'll be fine, like, just eat a lemon, ever.
you'll be fine, like, just eat a lemon, ever.
Mmm.
just eat a lemon, ever.
Mmm.
I feel better already, indeed! Mmm.
I feel better already, indeed! But getting more vitamins is I feel better already, indeed! But getting more vitamins is even better! But getting more vitamins is even better! No, it isn't.
even better! No, it isn't.
Vitamins are sort of like cats.
No, it isn't.
Vitamins are sort of like cats.
If you have no cats, Vitamins are sort of like cats.
If you have no cats, you'll be lonely.
If you have no cats, you'll be lonely.
If you have a cat or two, you'll be lonely.
If you have a cat or two, you'll feel better.
If you have a cat or two, you'll feel better.
But that's enough cats.
you'll feel better.
But that's enough cats.
No one needs to load up on cats.
And just like with cats, you don't want to overdo it.
Studies show that taking too don't want to overdo it.
Studies show that taking too much of some vitamins, like A, Studies show that taking too much of some vitamins, like A, D, or E, can actually much of some vitamins, like A, D, or E, can actually make you sick.
D, or E, can actually make you sick.
Well, even if that's true, make you sick.
Well, even if that's true, megadoses of Well, even if that's true, megadoses of vitamin C will cure-- megadoses of vitamin C will cure-- Nothing.
vitamin C will cure-- Nothing.
Vitamin C does not treat or cure Nothing.
Vitamin C does not treat or cure the common cold and products Vitamin C does not treat or cure the common cold and products that claim it does are nonsense.
Remember Airborne? Sure, the cold medicine created by a schoolteacher.
Sure, the cold medicine created by a schoolteacher.
It keeps you from getting colds created by a schoolteacher.
It keeps you from getting colds from touching the magazines It keeps you from getting colds from touching the magazines on airplanes.
from touching the magazines on airplanes.
That is not true.
on airplanes.
That is not true.
Who gave you a medical license? That is not true.
Who gave you a medical license? Oprah.
Who gave you a medical license? Oprah.
Airborne is a cocktail of Oprah.
Airborne is a cocktail of plain old vitamins that was Airborne is a cocktail of plain old vitamins that was marketed as a cure for plain old vitamins that was marketed as a cure for the common cold.
But in 2006, they were sued for false advertising and ended up paying out $23 million.
false advertising and ended up paying out $23 million.
Airborne doesn't cure anything.
paying out $23 million.
Airborne doesn't cure anything.
It's basically just bubbles.
When I take vitamin C, it makes me feel better.
Yes, the placebo effect is it makes me feel better.
Yes, the placebo effect is very powerful.
Yes, the placebo effect is very powerful.
But that's all it is.
very powerful.
But that's all it is.
In reality, at least 15 But that's all it is.
In reality, at least 15 different studies have concluded In reality, at least 15 different studies have concluded that vitamin C does not treat different studies have concluded that vitamin C does not treat the common cold.
Hey, it's not my fault everyone believes vitamins are magic.
It's Linus Pauling's fault.
Great, can I go back to doing my show now? Great, can I go back to doing my show now? No, no, no, do not pan away! my show now? No, no, no, do not pan away! Come on! No, no, no, do not pan away! Come on! Linus Pauling was a genius Come on! Linus Pauling was a genius chemist and the only person in Linus Pauling was a genius chemist and the only person in history to be awarded two solo chemist and the only person in history to be awarded two solo Nobel prizes.
history to be awarded two solo Nobel prizes.
He was one of America's true Nobel prizes.
He was one of America's true scientific celebrities.
He was one of America's true scientific celebrities.
Linus, I love your chemistry! scientific celebrities.
Linus, I love your chemistry! Your research is amazing! Linus, I love your chemistry! Your research is amazing! But in the early '70s, Your research is amazing! But in the early '70s, Pauling became obsessed with But in the early '70s, Pauling became obsessed with the idea of living forever and Pauling became obsessed with the idea of living forever and basically went vitamin-crazy.
Great Neils Bohr's ghost! I've got it.
He began claiming that I've got it.
He began claiming that massive doses of vitamin C could He began claiming that massive doses of vitamin C could prevent the common cold, prolong massive doses of vitamin C could prevent the common cold, prolong your life and even cure cancer.
prevent the common cold, prolong your life and even cure cancer.
and because has was your life and even cure cancer.
and because has was a celebrity scientist, and because has was a celebrity scientist, the media trusted him.
a celebrity scientist, the media trusted him.
So these vita-pills the media trusted him.
So these vita-pills will cure my sniffles? So these vita-pills will cure my sniffles? That's right, and get this: will cure my sniffles? That's right, and get this: You'll also never get sick That's right, and get this: You'll also never get sick or die.
You'll also never get sick or die.
Sounds pretty far out.
or die.
Sounds pretty far out.
Oh, yeah.
Sounds pretty far out.
Oh, yeah.
But if the smartest cat in Oh, yeah.
But if the smartest cat in America is saying it, But if the smartest cat in America is saying it, it must be true.
America is saying it, it must be true.
Up next is Charo it must be true.
Up next is Charo and puppet superstar Madam.
Up next is Charo and puppet superstar Madam.
No, no, no, no! and puppet superstar Madam.
No, no, no, no! No, you don't.
No, no, no, no! No, you don't.
We are going back to my show.
No, you don't.
We are going back to my show.
Where is it? We are going back to my show.
Where is it? This way! But repeated studies have proven that Pauling was totally wrong.
There is no medical basis that Pauling was totally wrong.
There is no medical basis for his claims, and in 1994, There is no medical basis for his claims, and in 1994, he actually died of cancer, for his claims, and in 1994, he actually died of cancer, the very disease he claimed he actually died of cancer, the very disease he claimed vitamins would cure.
the very disease he claimed vitamins would cure.
You're telling me that vitamins would cure.
You're telling me that vitamin supplements are a lie You're telling me that vitamin supplements are a lie and we only believe in them vitamin supplements are a lie and we only believe in them because one man went crazy.
and we only believe in them because one man went crazy.
Yeah.
because one man went crazy.
Yeah.
Pauling was the Michael Jackson Yeah.
Pauling was the Michael Jackson of nutrition.
Pauling was the Michael Jackson of nutrition.
He totally changed the game.
of nutrition.
He totally changed the game.
We had no idea how crazy he was, He totally changed the game.
We had no idea how crazy he was, and 40 years later, we're still We had no idea how crazy he was, and 40 years later, we're still humming the tunes.
and 40 years later, we're still humming the tunes.
Wow.
humming the tunes.
Wow.
That's bad.
Wow.
That's bad.
It's bad.
That's bad.
It's bad.
You know it.
Um, so we shouldn't listen to experts? No, of course you should.
listen to experts? No, of course you should.
You just need to remember that No, of course you should.
You just need to remember that experts can be wrong, too, You just need to remember that experts can be wrong, too, so you still need to critically experts can be wrong, too, so you still need to critically examine ideas, even when they so you still need to critically examine ideas, even when they come from a certifiable genius, examine ideas, even when they come from a certifiable genius, or a very handsome TV show host.
come from a certifiable genius, or a very handsome TV show host.
Oh, thank you.
or a very handsome TV show host.
Oh, thank you.
Sure.
Oh, thank you.
Sure.
You too.
Sure.
You too.
All right, you've told your You too.
All right, you've told your little vitamin story.
All right, you've told your little vitamin story.
Neato.
little vitamin story.
Neato.
Now, get out of here and go ruin Neato.
Now, get out of here and go ruin Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Now, get out of here and go ruin Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Oh, that's impossible.
Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Oh, that's impossible.
They are way too likeable.
Oh, that's impossible.
They are way too likeable.
Go.
Okay, everyone, reset.
Back to one.
I don't know what that was, but it's over.
When we come back, I'll be but it's over.
When we come back, I'll be talking about the most important When we come back, I'll be talking about the most important meal of the day.
talking about the most important meal of the day.
Breakfast.
meal of the day.
Breakfast.
And I'll be talking about how Breakfast.
And I'll be talking about how everything you know about And I'll be talking about how everything you know about breakfast is wrong.
everything you know about breakfast is wrong.
We have security.
breakfast is wrong.
We have security.
How does this keep happening? Whoa! I love Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Me too.
I love Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Me too.
Well, I love that they're Me too.
Well, I love that they're part of a balanced breakfast.
Well, I love that they're part of a balanced breakfast.
Actually, they're not.
part of a balanced breakfast.
Actually, they're not.
Also, I think your refrigerator Actually, they're not.
Also, I think your refrigerator shelves are broken.
Also, I think your refrigerator shelves are broken.
I know they are.
shelves are broken.
I know they are.
I broke them.
I know they are.
I broke them.
And you're out of mayo.
I broke them.
And you're out of mayo.
What's happening? And you're out of mayo.
What's happening? Adam, just let them finish What's happening? Adam, just let them finish the commercial so we can go Adam, just let them finish the commercial so we can go back to my show.
the commercial so we can go back to my show.
Sorry, but this commercial back to my show.
Sorry, but this commercial is full of lies.
Sorry, but this commercial is full of lies.
First of all, why do these ads is full of lies.
First of all, why do these ads always have so much food? First of all, why do these ads always have so much food? Who's eating this much? always have so much food? Who's eating this much? And secondly, this "balanced Who's eating this much? And secondly, this "balanced breakfast" is anything but.
And secondly, this "balanced breakfast" is anything but.
Come on, I'll show you! breakfast" is anything but.
Come on, I'll show you! I am so sorry.
Come on, I'll show you! I am so sorry.
Let's start with O.
J.
I am so sorry.
Let's start with O.
J.
Juice commercials would have you Let's start with O.
J.
Juice commercials would have you believe that every sip comes Juice commercials would have you believe that every sip comes right from the tree.
believe that every sip comes right from the tree.
Right.
right from the tree.
Right.
Orange juice is totally natural.
Right.
Orange juice is totally natural.
Look.
Orange juice is totally natural.
Look.
There's a straw Look.
There's a straw right in the orange.
There's a straw right in the orange.
It's like I'm drinking right in the orange.
It's like I'm drinking straight from the fruit.
It's like I'm drinking straight from the fruit.
Man, you really are gullible.
straight from the fruit.
Man, you really are gullible.
Yeah? Man, you really are gullible.
Yeah? Even "not from concentrate" Yeah? Even "not from concentrate" orange juice is just as Even "not from concentrate" orange juice is just as processed as any other mass orange juice is just as processed as any other mass market food.
processed as any other mass market food.
Orange juice has an extremely market food.
Orange juice has an extremely short shelf life, so to stop it Orange juice has an extremely short shelf life, so to stop it from spoiling, manufacturers short shelf life, so to stop it from spoiling, manufacturers extract all the oxygen from spoiling, manufacturers extract all the oxygen from the juice.
extract all the oxygen from the juice.
(mechanical twriling, beeping) Oxygen removal complete.
But that process also removes all the orange flavor.
But that process also removes all the orange flavor.
It just tastes like removes all the orange flavor.
It just tastes like sweet.
It just tastes like sweet.
Right.
sweet.
Right.
So manufacturers artificially Right.
So manufacturers artificially jam it back in by using So manufacturers artificially jam it back in by using flavor packs.
jam it back in by using flavor packs.
That can't be natural.
flavor packs.
That can't be natural.
It's not.
That can't be natural.
It's not.
The taste that you know as It's not.
The taste that you know as Tropicana, Florida's Natural The taste that you know as Tropicana, Florida's Natural or Minute Maid was actually Tropicana, Florida's Natural or Minute Maid was actually designed in the same lab that or Minute Maid was actually designed in the same lab that makes perfume for Calvin Klein designed in the same lab that makes perfume for Calvin Klein and Dior.
makes perfume for Calvin Klein and Dior.
Oh, citrusy! and Dior.
Oh, citrusy! The trick is, since the flavor Oh, citrusy! The trick is, since the flavor packs are technically made The trick is, since the flavor packs are technically made of orange byproducts, packs are technically made of orange byproducts, they don't have to write of orange byproducts, they don't have to write "artificially flavored" they don't have to write "artificially flavored" on the label, but they are.
"artificially flavored" on the label, but they are.
Well, if it's all oranges, on the label, but they are.
Well, if it's all oranges, who cares? Well, if it's all oranges, who cares? Yeah.
who cares? Yeah.
Flavor packs aren't bad Yeah.
Flavor packs aren't bad for you, they're just Flavor packs aren't bad for you, they're just super interesting.
for you, they're just super interesting.
Uh-huh.
super interesting.
Uh-huh.
Well, great.
Uh-huh.
Well, great.
What's bad for you about Well, great.
What's bad for you about orange juice is the sugar.
What's bad for you about orange juice is the sugar.
What sugar? orange juice is the sugar.
What sugar? Kind of a strong reaction.
What sugar? Kind of a strong reaction.
You didn't know this? Kind of a strong reaction.
You didn't know this? O.
J.
is loaded with it.
You didn't know this? O.
J.
is loaded with it.
An eight-ounce glass of O.
J.
is loaded with it.
An eight-ounce glass of Tropicana contains 22 grams An eight-ounce glass of Tropicana contains 22 grams of sugar.
Tropicana contains 22 grams of sugar.
That's almost as much as a of sugar.
That's almost as much as a Pepsi, which makes sense, since That's almost as much as a Pepsi, which makes sense, since Tropicana is owned by Pepsi.
Pepsi, which makes sense, since Tropicana is owned by Pepsi.
Really? Tropicana is owned by Pepsi.
Really? Oh, man.
Really? Oh, man.
Network says I'm fired if Oh, man.
Network says I'm fired if I can't keep my weight down.
It's milk for me.
Does a body good.
Where'd you hear that? Does a body good.
Where'd you hear that? TV? Where'd you hear that? TV? Ah, more empty advertising.
TV? Ah, more empty advertising.
Come on! Ah, more empty advertising.
Come on! You mean all those fun milk Come on! You mean all those fun milk PSAs from the '90s? You mean all those fun milk PSAs from the '90s? Those weren't ads.
PSAs from the '90s? Those weren't ads.
They were trying Those weren't ads.
They were trying to keep us healthy.
They were trying to keep us healthy.
Sorry, Todd.
to keep us healthy.
Sorry, Todd.
But those PSAs were just Sorry, Todd.
But those PSAs were just for-profit marketing paid for But those PSAs were just for-profit marketing paid for by the dairy industry.
for-profit marketing paid for by the dairy industry.
Milk's got stuff that's good by the dairy industry.
Milk's got stuff that's good for my bones and stuff that's Milk's got stuff that's good for my bones and stuff that's good for my muscles.
for my bones and stuff that's good for my muscles.
Strong bones, beautiful skin good for my muscles.
Strong bones, beautiful skin and a healthy body.
Strong bones, beautiful skin and a healthy body.
All that protein for muscle, and a healthy body.
All that protein for muscle, and calcium for bones.
All that protein for muscle, and calcium for bones.
We've been fed claims like and calcium for bones.
We've been fed claims like these ever since we were kids, We've been fed claims like these ever since we were kids, but none of them are true.
these ever since we were kids, but none of them are true.
Repeated research has shown but none of them are true.
Repeated research has shown that milk does not help you Repeated research has shown that milk does not help you build strong bones.
that milk does not help you build strong bones.
In fact, one study found that build strong bones.
In fact, one study found that people who drink a lot of milk In fact, one study found that people who drink a lot of milk are at a higher rate people who drink a lot of milk are at a higher rate of bone fracture.
are at a higher rate of bone fracture.
Okay, but we need milk of bone fracture.
Okay, but we need milk for calcium.
You know, there's calcium everywhere.
Gram for gram, most dried herbs there's calcium everywhere.
Gram for gram, most dried herbs have more calcium than milk.
Oh, hey, it's Alissa Hamilton, and she's a journalist who's written extensively and she's a journalist who's written extensively about the orange juice who's written extensively about the orange juice and dairy industries.
about the orange juice and dairy industries.
Milk is not the wonder food and dairy industries.
Milk is not the wonder food that we once thought it was.
A glass of plain milk has 13 grams of naturally occurring sugar.
More sugar? I hate sugar! We've been told our entire I hate sugar! We've been told our entire lives that milk is some kind of We've been told our entire lives that milk is some kind of nutritional necessity, lives that milk is some kind of nutritional necessity, but it's not.
nutritional necessity, but it's not.
It's just another product being but it's not.
It's just another product being marketed like any other.
It's just another product being marketed like any other.
What are we supposed marketed like any other.
What are we supposed to put on our cereal, then? What are we supposed to put on our cereal, then? Water? to put on our cereal, then? Water? Ugh! Water? Ugh! Maybe it's time we let go Ugh! Maybe it's time we let go of cereal, too.
What? But we love our Honey Toasted Crunchies.
But we love our Honey Toasted Crunchies.
I'm very difficult to handle Honey Toasted Crunchies.
I'm very difficult to handle if I don't get my Crunchies.
I'm very difficult to handle if I don't get my Crunchies.
Well, what if I told you if I don't get my Crunchies.
Well, what if I told you that cereal was invented by Well, what if I told you that cereal was invented by sex-hating religious zealots? that cereal was invented by sex-hating religious zealots? Jeez, man, my kid's here.
sex-hating religious zealots? Jeez, man, my kid's here.
Oh, never too young to learn.
Jeez, man, my kid's here.
Oh, never too young to learn.
Breakfast cereal as we know it Oh, never too young to learn.
Breakfast cereal as we know it was invented by a man named Breakfast cereal as we know it was invented by a man named John Harvey Kellogg, was invented by a man named John Harvey Kellogg, and if you saw John Harvey Kellogg, and if you saw our sex episode and if you saw our sex episode He didn't.
our sex episode He didn't.
You'll remember that he was He didn't.
You'll remember that he was a real weirdo.
You'll remember that he was a real weirdo.
Masturbation causes insanity, a real weirdo.
Masturbation causes insanity, and circumcision is the cure.
Masturbation causes insanity, and circumcision is the cure.
Gah! and circumcision is the cure.
Gah! The other cure, a delicious Gah! The other cure, a delicious bowl of Dr.
Kellogg's granula.
The other cure, a delicious bowl of Dr.
Kellogg's granula.
It preserves your sperm bowl of Dr.
Kellogg's granula.
It preserves your sperm for strength.
It preserves your sperm for strength.
Why does he think those two for strength.
Why does he think those two things are related? Why does he think those two things are related? Well, he was following things are related? Well, he was following the teachings of an evangelical Well, he was following the teachings of an evangelical minister named Sylvester Graham, the teachings of an evangelical minister named Sylvester Graham, who believed that sugar minister named Sylvester Graham, who believed that sugar and spice were tools of Satan.
who believed that sugar and spice were tools of Satan.
Spicy rich foods lead and spice were tools of Satan.
Spicy rich foods lead to impure thoughts Spicy rich foods lead to impure thoughts and sinful deeds! to impure thoughts and sinful deeds! They inspire thoughts of and sinful deeds! They inspire thoughts of sex and the devil.
They inspire thoughts of sex and the devil.
A sexy devil, like Elvira! sex and the devil.
A sexy devil, like Elvira! To remain sane and pure, A sexy devil, like Elvira! To remain sane and pure, eat my newest creation, To remain sane and pure, eat my newest creation, the graham cracker! eat my newest creation, the graham cracker! Ooh, I love graham crackers.
the graham cracker! Ooh, I love graham crackers.
You might not like Ooh, I love graham crackers.
You might not like this one, though.
You might not like this one, though.
Is that a snack this one, though.
Is that a snack or a punishment? Is that a snack or a punishment? Yeah, the original foods or a punishment? Yeah, the original foods these guys invented were Yeah, the original foods these guys invented were practically inedible, these guys invented were practically inedible, and that was that point.
practically inedible, and that was that point.
Eating hard flaked wheat lets and that was that point.
Eating hard flaked wheat lets God know you hate pleasure.
Eating hard flaked wheat lets God know you hate pleasure.
It's what you deserve, God know you hate pleasure.
It's what you deserve, you sexy sinner! It's what you deserve, you sexy sinner! Despite their weird ideas, you sexy sinner! Despite their weird ideas, Kellogg's cereal and graham Despite their weird ideas, Kellogg's cereal and graham crackers were actually a lot Kellogg's cereal and graham crackers were actually a lot healthier than what most people crackers were actually a lot healthier than what most people ate back then, healthier than what most people ate back then, but a century later, we filled ate back then, but a century later, we filled them both with sugar.
but a century later, we filled them both with sugar.
Sugar? them both with sugar.
Sugar? Mm-hmm.
Sugar? Mm-hmm.
Sugar! If you gave a bowl of today's cereal to Kellogg or Graham, they would be horrified.
cereal to Kellogg or Graham, they would be horrified.
Blasphemy! they would be horrified.
Blasphemy! These will inspire Blasphemy! These will inspire lustful thoughts.
These will inspire lustful thoughts.
They smell so sweet and sugary.
lustful thoughts.
They smell so sweet and sugary.
The scent goes straight They smell so sweet and sugary.
The scent goes straight to my member! The scent goes straight to my member! Guys, it doesn't really to my member! Guys, it doesn't really work that way.
Guys, it doesn't really work that way.
You make your own truth, work that way.
You make your own truth, I guess.
Okay, so what should we eat for breakfast, then? Oh, well, I eat oatmeal for breakfast, then? Oh, well, I eat oatmeal with soy sauce on it.
Oh, well, I eat oatmeal with soy sauce on it.
What? with soy sauce on it.
What? It's good.
What? It's good.
Look, eat whatever you like.
It's good.
Look, eat whatever you like.
Just forget all this marketing Look, eat whatever you like.
Just forget all this marketing and think outside Just forget all this marketing and think outside the cereal box.
and think outside the cereal box.
Wow, we've learned the cereal box.
Wow, we've learned a lot today.
Wow, we've learned a lot today.
But we better a lot today.
But we better get back to my show.
But we better get back to my show.
This commercial break get back to my show.
This commercial break has taken forever.
This commercial break has taken forever.
Well, wait.
has taken forever.
Well, wait.
What happens to us? Well, wait.
What happens to us? Oh, you're not real.
What happens to us? Oh, you're not real.
You're just a commercial family.
Oh, you're not real.
You're just a commercial family.
Bye! You're just a commercial family.
Bye! No.
Bye! No.
No, I work at Office? Mommy? Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Part of an unbalanced breakfast.
Honey Toasted Crunchies.
Part of an unbalanced breakfast.
And we're back.
Part of an unbalanced breakfast.
And we're back.
We have to go back And we're back.
We have to go back to break already? We have to go back to break already? Well, stay tuned, 'cause when we to break already? Well, stay tuned, 'cause when we come back, I'll be telling you Well, stay tuned, 'cause when we come back, I'll be telling you how eating chocolate can come back, I'll be telling you how eating chocolate can actually help you lose weight.
how eating chocolate can actually help you lose weight.
And I'll be explaining how actually help you lose weight.
And I'll be explaining how medical shows like this one end And I'll be explaining how medical shows like this one end up telling you big fat medical shows like this one end up telling you big fat lies like that.
up telling you big fat lies like that.
Why is nobody stopping this? lies like that.
Why is nobody stopping this? I locked the doors Why is nobody stopping this? I locked the doors from the outside.
I locked the doors from the outside.
No one can get in.
Sorry about all the unexpected interruptions earlier, but now, I'm gonna tell the unexpected interruptions earlier, but now, I'm gonna tell you about a remarkable new diet earlier, but now, I'm gonna tell you about a remarkable new diet tip, and this one really works.
you about a remarkable new diet tip, and this one really works.
Are you sure about that? tip, and this one really works.
Are you sure about that? You have a "remarkable new diet Are you sure about that? You have a "remarkable new diet tip that really works" You have a "remarkable new diet tip that really works" on every show.
tip that really works" on every show.
Uh, yeah.
on every show.
Uh, yeah.
There was a scientific study Uh, yeah.
There was a scientific study done on it, so I'm pretty sure There was a scientific study done on it, so I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.
done on it, so I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.
Plus, I have a TV show.
Yeah, just because you have a TV show doesn't mean you can't be wrong.
a TV show doesn't mean you can't be wrong.
Heck, my show is fact-checked you can't be wrong.
Heck, my show is fact-checked and I could be wrong.
That's why I put my sources on screen, so that people can check my work.
on screen, so that people can check my work.
Do you do that? can check my work.
Do you do that? No, but I just know Do you do that? No, but I just know I'm right about this one.
No, but I just know I'm right about this one.
Okay.
I'm right about this one.
Okay.
My next guest discovered that Okay.
My next guest discovered that adding chocolate to your diet My next guest discovered that adding chocolate to your diet can actually help you adding chocolate to your diet can actually help you lose weight.
can actually help you lose weight.
I knew it.
lose weight.
I knew it.
Please welcome John Bohannon.
This man is a fraud.
Adam, no he's not, he's my guest.
Adam, no he's not, he's my guest.
I'm sorry, John.
he's my guest.
I'm sorry, John.
No, no, I am a fraud man.
I purposefully did a fraudulent study about the health benefits of chocolate and I convinced study about the health benefits of chocolate and I convinced the media that eating chocolate of chocolate and I convinced the media that eating chocolate helps you lose weight.
the media that eating chocolate helps you lose weight.
Why would you do that? helps you lose weight.
Why would you do that? Because nutritious science Why would you do that? Because nutritious science is totally broken and I wanted Because nutritious science is totally broken and I wanted to show that it's actually very is totally broken and I wanted to show that it's actually very easy to fool the media into to show that it's actually very easy to fool the media into making those big headlines that easy to fool the media into making those big headlines that cause those crazy diet fads making those big headlines that cause those crazy diet fads in the first place.
cause those crazy diet fads in the first place.
God, I love your work.
in the first place.
God, I love your work.
Likewise.
God, I love your work.
Likewise.
Which brings us to our next Likewise.
Which brings us to our next segment, Cooking Up a Fraudulent Which brings us to our next segment, Cooking Up a Fraudulent Study With Chefs Adam and John.
So, John, tell us.
How do you bake this terrible cake? How do you bake this terrible cake? It's a recipe this terrible cake? It's a recipe with four steps.
It's a recipe with four steps.
First, you have to take a with four steps.
First, you have to take a really skewed sample rather First, you have to take a really skewed sample rather than a properly balanced one.
really skewed sample rather than a properly balanced one.
Okay, so I'll take a little than a properly balanced one.
Okay, so I'll take a little bit of this, and this, Okay, so I'll take a little bit of this, and this, and some of these.
bit of this, and this, and some of these.
And ooh, this wouldn't make and some of these.
And ooh, this wouldn't make any sense in here.
And ooh, this wouldn't make any sense in here.
Yeah.
any sense in here.
Yeah.
Next, you need to cherry-pick Yeah.
Next, you need to cherry-pick your data, taking the stuff that Next, you need to cherry-pick your data, taking the stuff that supports what you're interested your data, taking the stuff that supports what you're interested in and throwing out the rest.
supports what you're interested in and throwing out the rest.
Okay, so, like, this one in and throwing out the rest.
Okay, so, like, this one supports my claims and this one.
Okay, so, like, this one supports my claims and this one.
And this one here.
supports my claims and this one.
And this one here.
But the rest of these, And this one here.
But the rest of these, I can just throw away.
But the rest of these, I can just throw away.
Wow, that's so easy! I can just throw away.
Wow, that's so easy! Third, you need to get it Wow, that's so easy! Third, you need to get it published in a shady journal Third, you need to get it published in a shady journal with no academic standards.
published in a shady journal with no academic standards.
Oh, we have one with no academic standards.
Oh, we have one right over here.
Oh, we have one right over here.
But it has to have a sciencey right over here.
But it has to have a sciencey name, like, the International But it has to have a sciencey name, like, the International Archives of Medicine.
name, like, the International Archives of Medicine.
What's great about journals Archives of Medicine.
What's great about journals like this is they'll take What's great about journals like this is they'll take any garbage you give 'em.
like this is they'll take any garbage you give 'em.
Don't the science journals any garbage you give 'em.
Don't the science journals have to make sure that Don't the science journals have to make sure that the papers are actually, have to make sure that the papers are actually, like, scientific? the papers are actually, like, scientific? Well, for most journals, yes, like, scientific? Well, for most journals, yes, but there are journals that are Well, for most journals, yes, but there are journals that are just out to make a buck and but there are journals that are just out to make a buck and they'll publish anything you just out to make a buck and they'll publish anything you send them as long as you pay up.
they'll publish anything you send them as long as you pay up.
Before the show, we did get a send them as long as you pay up.
Before the show, we did get a paper published.
Before the show, we did get a paper published.
Oh, look at this.
paper published.
Oh, look at this.
Look at how beautiful this is.
Oh, look at this.
Look at how beautiful this is.
It's called "The Possible Look at how beautiful this is.
It's called "The Possible Irritating Effects of It's called "The Possible Irritating Effects of Nutritional Facts" and it was Irritating Effects of Nutritional Facts" and it was published in Advances in Nutritional Facts" and it was published in Advances in Nutrition and Food Technology.
published in Advances in Nutrition and Food Technology.
What's in it? Nutrition and Food Technology.
What's in it? Oh, nothing.
What's in it? Oh, nothing.
It's just the script Oh, nothing.
It's just the script to this episode.
It's just the script to this episode.
It's not even a scientific to this episode.
It's not even a scientific paper, but because we paid the It's not even a scientific paper, but because we paid the journal $369, they published it verbatim and now we can cite it like any other source.
Isn't that fun? Look at that.
Isn't that fun? Look at that.
A script of the episode? Look at that.
A script of the episode? Am I on acid? A script of the episode? Am I on acid? No, you're on TV.
Am I on acid? No, you're on TV.
(ding) No, you're on TV.
(ding) Oh, it's ready.
(ding) Oh, it's ready.
Oh, my, John.
Oh, it's ready.
Oh, my, John.
Look at this, this is beautiful.
Oh, my, John.
Look at this, this is beautiful.
Look at how deliciously Look at this, this is beautiful.
Look at how deliciously unscientific that is.
Look at how deliciously unscientific that is.
You know, but it does still seem unscientific that is.
You know, but it does still seem like it's missing something.
You know, but it does still seem like it's missing something.
That's right.
like it's missing something.
That's right.
Because that brings us That's right.
Because that brings us to the fourth step.
Because that brings us to the fourth step.
You need to put out a press to the fourth step.
You need to put out a press release with exaggerated You need to put out a press release with exaggerated language to tantalize release with exaggerated language to tantalize the journalists.
language to tantalize the journalists.
Who could resist this? the journalists.
Who could resist this? So sugary and delicious.
Who could resist this? So sugary and delicious.
Voila.
So sugary and delicious.
Voila.
You've got a piping hot Voila.
You've got a piping hot pan of garbage.
You've got a piping hot pan of garbage.
Ooh, a delicious new study.
pan of garbage.
Ooh, a delicious new study.
Ooh, so sharable.
Ooh, a delicious new study.
Ooh, so sharable.
Yes, please.
Ooh, so sharable.
Yes, please.
Oh, that is disgusting.
Yes, please.
Oh, that is disgusting.
Reporters are hungry for Oh, that is disgusting.
Reporters are hungry for content and they're more than Reporters are hungry for content and they're more than willing to gobble up even faulty content and they're more than willing to gobble up even faulty science, and in the case of my willing to gobble up even faulty science, and in the case of my study, which had totally science, and in the case of my study, which had totally unfounded claims, they covered study, which had totally unfounded claims, they covered it all over the world.
unfounded claims, they covered it all over the world.
And this pattern is repeated it all over the world.
And this pattern is repeated in the media every day.
And this pattern is repeated in the media every day.
Press-hungry researchers get bad in the media every day.
Press-hungry researchers get bad science published in Press-hungry researchers get bad science published in disreputable journals and shows science published in disreputable journals and shows like yours peddle it disreputable journals and shows like yours peddle it to people like these.
like yours peddle it to people like these.
But the fact is, most of the to people like these.
But the fact is, most of the nutrition science reported on in But the fact is, most of the nutrition science reported on in the media isn't science at all.
My God.
Ancient melons? Ph balance water? Ancient melons? Ph balance water? Acai berries? Ph balance water? Acai berries? None of it's real? Acai berries? None of it's real? None of it.
None of it's real? None of it.
You lied to us, None of it.
You lied to us, Dr.
Todd! You lied to us, Dr.
Todd! You told us to try oil pulling! Dr.
Todd! You told us to try oil pulling! I have been eating green You told us to try oil pulling! I have been eating green coffee beans for a year I have been eating green coffee beans for a year because of you.
coffee beans for a year because of you.
I haven't slept in weeks! because of you.
I haven't slept in weeks! Are your abs even real? I haven't slept in weeks! Are your abs even real? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Are your abs even real? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Come on.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Come on.
Adam, man.
Come on.
Adam, man.
Just tell them the surprising Adam, man.
Just tell them the surprising new fact about how it isn't Just tell them the surprising new fact about how it isn't really my fault! new fact about how it isn't really my fault! Sorry, it is.
really my fault! Sorry, it is.
Shows like yours give bad Sorry, it is.
Shows like yours give bad medical advice, mislead people Shows like yours give bad medical advice, mislead people and convince them of dangerous medical advice, mislead people and convince them of dangerous pseudo science just to sell ads.
and convince them of dangerous pseudo science just to sell ads.
That's not just being pseudo science just to sell ads.
That's not just being a bad doctor.
That's not just being a bad doctor.
That's being a bad person.
a bad doctor.
That's being a bad person.
Let's burn this place That's being a bad person.
Let's burn this place to the ground! Let's burn this place to the ground! Yeah! to the ground! Yeah! Oh, that was too convincing.
Yeah! Oh, that was too convincing.
I do not know my own strength.
No, everyone, stop! There's an answer to all of this! There's an answer to all of this! And I'll tell you about it to all of this! And I'll tell you about it in just a And I'll tell you about it in just a Uh-oh.
Why did we do a pitchfork giveaway? I'm gonna lose my show and have a pitchfork giveaway? I'm gonna lose my show and have to go back to stripping! I'm gonna lose my show and have to go back to stripping! Everybody, calm down! to go back to stripping! Everybody, calm down! No! Everybody, calm down! No! Not until Dr.
Todd No! Not until Dr.
Todd tells us the truth! Not until Dr.
Todd tells us the truth! You have to tell me tells us the truth! You have to tell me what to eat! You have to tell me what to eat! How am I supposed to know what to eat! How am I supposed to know what to eat? How am I supposed to know what to eat? I don't know! what to eat? I don't know! I'm a fraud! I don't know! I'm a fraud! Guys, you just have I'm a fraud! Guys, you just have to use common sense.
Guys, you just have to use common sense.
Instead of listening to the TV to use common sense.
Instead of listening to the TV or advertisers, listen to your Instead of listening to the TV or advertisers, listen to your doctor, your real doctor.
or advertisers, listen to your doctor, your real doctor.
Debbie.
doctor, your real doctor.
Debbie.
It's Debbie, right? Debbie.
It's Debbie, right? Yeah.
It's Debbie, right? Yeah.
Before you started watching Yeah.
Before you started watching this show, didn't you have Before you started watching this show, didn't you have your own doctor who gave you this show, didn't you have your own doctor who gave you informed advice? your own doctor who gave you informed advice? Oh, yeah.
informed advice? Oh, yeah.
Dr.
Thompson.
Oh, yeah.
Dr.
Thompson.
He had, like, a regular face Dr.
Thompson.
He had, like, a regular face and no TV show, but I liked him.
He had, like, a regular face and no TV show, but I liked him.
I miss him.
and no TV show, but I liked him.
I miss him.
I miss you too, Debbie.
Dr.
Thompson? I'd like to do some blood work.
I'd like to do some blood work.
And if you'd let me, some blood work.
And if you'd let me, listen to your heart.
You had me at blood work.
I think they're gonna be really healthy together.
And on top of that, each of us really healthy together.
And on top of that, each of us already has the best tool And on top of that, each of us already has the best tool available for tracking health.
already has the best tool available for tracking health.
FitBit? available for tracking health.
FitBit? An Apple Watch? FitBit? An Apple Watch? Whatever it is, I will buy it.
An Apple Watch? Whatever it is, I will buy it.
No, I'm talking about Whatever it is, I will buy it.
No, I'm talking about your body.
No, I'm talking about your body.
Please welcome our last guest, your body.
Please welcome our last guest, your body! Oh! No, this is a nightmare! No.
No, this is a nightmare! No.
A great first step in being No.
A great first step in being healthy is to listen A great first step in being healthy is to listen to your body.
healthy is to listen to your body.
When you eat something bad, to your body.
When you eat something bad, you'll know, When you eat something bad, you'll know, 'cause you'll feel bad.
you'll know, 'cause you'll feel bad.
When you eat something good 'cause you'll feel bad.
When you eat something good and exercise, you'll feel good.
When you eat something good and exercise, you'll feel good.
All you have to do is pay and exercise, you'll feel good.
All you have to do is pay attention to what All you have to do is pay attention to what your body says.
attention to what your body says.
I like grapes! your body says.
I like grapes! See? I like grapes! See? You just learned See? You just learned you like grapes.
You just learned you like grapes.
Make it stop.
you like grapes.
Make it stop.
Oh, come on.
Make it stop.
Oh, come on.
Love your body! Oh, come on.
Love your body! No! Love your body! No! Sorry, body.
No! Sorry, body.
I guess he's not ready.
How are you doing this? Low budget green screen, I think? Low budget green screen, I think? Look, you don't have I think? Look, you don't have to eat perfectly.
Look, you don't have to eat perfectly.
Lord knows I don't.
to eat perfectly.
Lord knows I don't.
Just eat in moderation, Lord knows I don't.
Just eat in moderation, healthy food whenever you can Just eat in moderation, healthy food whenever you can and get some exercise.
healthy food whenever you can and get some exercise.
That's all you need.
and get some exercise.
That's all you need.
That makes sense, but how am That's all you need.
That makes sense, but how am I supposed to make a show That makes sense, but how am I supposed to make a show of that every day? I supposed to make a show of that every day? I don't know.
of that every day? I don't know.
Oprah added a book club, I don't know.
Oprah added a book club, you'll think of something.
You're right.
I got into this 'cause I wanted to help people, not just have I got into this 'cause I wanted to help people, not just have my own line of teeth whitening to help people, not just have my own line of teeth whitening strips, and I did it because my own line of teeth whitening strips, and I did it because I loved medicine.
strips, and I did it because I loved medicine.
I guess I just got lost I loved medicine.
I guess I just got lost somewhere along the way.
I guess I just got lost somewhere along the way.
You know somewhere along the way.
You know my name's not even Todd.
You know my name's not even Todd.
It's Rodney.
my name's not even Todd.
It's Rodney.
Rod Bodd? It's Rodney.
Rod Bodd? Yeah.
Rod Bodd? Yeah.
It wasn't catchy enough Yeah.
It wasn't catchy enough for television.
I'm gonna do it, Adam.
I'm gonna do a show based on real medical science, I'm gonna do a show based on real medical science, not puffery or flimflam.
That sounds great, Rod.
I'm sure it'll be a big hit.
(crow cawing) (meowing) Oh.
Hey, are you wearing those Shape Up shoes? Hey, are you wearing those Shape Up shoes? Yeah, toning my butt.
Shape Up shoes? Yeah, toning my butt.
You know they don't Yeah, toning my butt.
You know they don't work at all.
You know they don't work at all.
Sketchers was actually hit with work at all.
Sketchers was actually hit with a class-action lawsuit Sketchers was actually hit with a class-action lawsuit over them.
a class-action lawsuit over them.
They ended up shelling out over them.
They ended up shelling out over $40 million.
They ended up shelling out over $40 million.
Wait, all these do is make me over $40 million.
Wait, all these do is make me look weird? Wait, all these do is make me look weird? That's bull (bleep)! Oh, with all due respect, you also don't have a head, so.
Well, what are you saying? you also don't have a head, so.
Well, what are you saying? Nothing.
Well, what are you saying? Nothing.
Forget it.
Nothing.
Forget it.
Jeez.
Forget it.
Jeez.
You really gotta watch what you Jeez.
You really gotta watch what you say around this guy.