Batman s01e50 Episode Script
Zatanna
Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for magic.
Good evening, Gotham.
I'm Zatanna.
Tonight, I can promise you a few surprises.
A thrill or two along the way.
And with luck, a happy ending.
How long has it been, 10 years, 12? All that and another lifetime.
She and her father were fond of you.
I was a different person then.
Yes.
Intense, driven, moody.
She'd never recognize you now.
Now open your heart to magic, and become a child again.
Remember, concentration and control.
Focus on them, and you can master any escape.
Go.
Congratulations.
You've beaten your old time by six seconds.
Yes.
You've got the makings of a great magician.
I'm sorry you're going to be moving on.
Same here.
It was an honor to study with you, Zatara.
But to what end? Three months ago you appeared on my doorstep with no interest in performing.
And yet dying to become an escape artist.
And for some reason, I wound up teaching you secrets I'd never shown another magician.
You could've sent me away.
No.
There was something inside you I had no right to deny.
Something deep and painful.
After all, I would be foolish to assume I was the only one with secrets.
Eh, John Smith? Thanks for everything, sir.
I'll miss you, John.
And so, I trust, will Zatanna.
Hi, Daddy.
Good night, children.
I thought you'd be finishing the tour with us.
I'm leaving for Japan tomorrow.
There's still a lot I have to learn.
Boy, that's you.
One big serious schoolboy.
No time in your life for fun or magic.
Here, pick a card.
I'll tell your future.
I see emotion, intensity two of hearts.
Joker.
Oh, it's a dumb trick anyway.
Look, I don't know the future, but I know I'll see you again someday, Zanna.
You're the only one who ever calls me Zanna.
I really hate it.
No goodbye hug? See.
It's not so bad.
- I'll write you.
- No, you won't.
- I promise.
- You can't.
I locked your hands to the wall.
What? Looks like someone's missing their plane tomorrow.
If you were any kind of escape artist you'd be out of those cuffs and through the door by now.
Now you see him, now you don't.
Thank you.
You know I have this little problem with money.
Seems like it disappears before I even make it.
And here to help demonstrate are Mr.
Irving Fauncewater director of the Gotham Mint, and noted magic debunker Dr.
Montague Kane.
Welcome, gentlemen.
Miss Zatanna.
This is so exciting.
Let me guess, first time on stage, Irv? Nothing like enthusiasm, right, folks? The way they're responding, one would think your ridiculous stunt's going to work.
Just to clue you in, Monty here makes a living exposing magicians' secrets.
Simple tricks and nonsense.
And I've invited him here to find the secret of the feat I'm attempting tonight.
There is no secret.
What you're proposing is flat-out impossible.
Well, kids, impossible is what I'm all about.
Mr.
Fauncewater, open the doors, please.
Ten million dollars and the means to make it.
Take a good look, because you know what they say about money: Easy come easy go! Oh, my.
Bravo, my dear.
It was a pleasure to be proven wrong.
Thank you, Monty.
And now, just so Irv doesn't have a fit, I'll bring it back good as new.
The money.
Where's the money? "Where's the money," he says.
It's right there, isn't it? It's gone.
What have you done with it? Now take it easy, Irv.
I'm sure there's a perfectly logical explanation.
I'm sure the audience would like to hear it.
- As would the police.
- Now, wait a minute.
Police, police! The police are coming.
It's a trick, an illusion.
I don't know what went wrong but if we can all just calm down for a second You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say can be used against you This never happens to me in Vegas.
She's been set up.
Obviously, but as she's the only suspect, the police must hold her.
Giving the real thief time to escape.
I can't let that happen.
And more important, you can't desert an old friend.
- Nice car.
- Thanks.
I didn't love the idea of spending the night in jail but this makes me a fugitive.
I believe I'm looking at prison time now.
I heard about the mint robbery.
I can prove you didn't do it.
Why do you care about some leggy dame in nylons? Or have I answered my own question? If you want to go it alone No, no.
I'm sorry.
I'm having a bad day.
I'm sure whoever framed you knew how your trick was done.
They may have left a clue at the mint.
- This place is surrounded by cops.
- Just relax.
That's where the money was.
Look.
This line was recently scraped into the floor.
Whatever made it left shards of glass too.
That would have been one mighty big piece of glass.
Or mirror.
Like the one you used to reflect the hologram of the vanished mint.
Oh, sure, take all the mystery out of life.
I think the money was stolen before you got here.
The thief reflected a hologram of the cash while you did your trick.
Then quickly hid the mirror when it was over.
How'd he get rid of a mirror that big? He didn't.
It's still here.
Who's in here? Hold it.
Stay where you are.
Only another magician could have rigged that trick.
Or someone who knows their methods.
Like Montague Kane.
He's been ripping off illusionists for years.
I thought I finally had a trick even he couldn't expose.
Wrong.
I'll settle with Kane.
Meantime, I'd better drop you someplace safe.
Oh, no.
Kane played me for a sap, and I'll see him go down for it.
All right, but it could be dangerous.
Sure there's no one you want to call first? Friends, family, a husband, maybe? Me? Who's got time for a relationship when you pull rabbits out of a hat 52 weeks a year? Besides, someone's got to keep the old act going now that dad's gone.
- I'm sorry.
- Why? I saw him perform when I was younger.
He was great.
Thanks.
You know I have the weirdest feeling we've met before.
I just have that kind of face.
It would seem I have guests.
Come in, and join me by the fire.
Come, come.
Don't be shy.
You've obviously unraveled my little scheme and I would congratulate you face to face.
You're not going to have a face when I'm done with you.
You slimy It's a trap.
A trifle clichéd, I know, but effective nonetheless.
And while you briefly savor your fleeting triumph I am winging toward more comfortable surroundings.
Adieu.
- I have an idea.
- Oh, I would hope so.
This way.
I always did know how to make an exit.
Unfortunately, so did Kane.
And while you briefly savor your fleeting triumph I am winging toward more comfortable surroundings.
Adieu.
Come on.
The show's not over yet.
Take a last longing look, gentlemen.
We're heading to a place where the climate's warmer, the people friendlier and the extradition laws are nonexistent.
The only place you're heading is a prison cell.
Well done, Batman.
You not only eluded my trap, but solved my clue as well.
Get rid of him.
Oh, Monty.
You fell for the second-oldest trick in the book.
And here's the first.
Keep your distance, detective.
You are most engaging, my dear.
Beautiful, impetuous.
I could be persuaded to spare you, if properly implored.
Bring them both! With all reverence for the departed, Zatara himself couldn't escape those locks.
Still, between the two of you, you might be able to loosen a few chains before you hit the water.
Take my hand.
Scared? That makes two of us.
- Trust me, Zanna.
- Zanna? Quick, in my glove.
Farewell, my dear Zatanna.
We could have been magic.
Incredible.
Stop firing, you fools! Get rid of him.
Don't you know? A magician never does the same trick twice.
So you never wrote.
I meant to.
Really.
Hey, it's okay.
I can see you've been busy.
- Just answer an old friend one question.
- Shoot.
What happened that made you put this on? A painful memory.
And a promise.
I'd say you're keeping that promise pretty well.
And for what it's worth, Dad would have been proud of you tonight.
You too.
Can I give you a ride?
Good evening, Gotham.
I'm Zatanna.
Tonight, I can promise you a few surprises.
A thrill or two along the way.
And with luck, a happy ending.
How long has it been, 10 years, 12? All that and another lifetime.
She and her father were fond of you.
I was a different person then.
Yes.
Intense, driven, moody.
She'd never recognize you now.
Now open your heart to magic, and become a child again.
Remember, concentration and control.
Focus on them, and you can master any escape.
Go.
Congratulations.
You've beaten your old time by six seconds.
Yes.
You've got the makings of a great magician.
I'm sorry you're going to be moving on.
Same here.
It was an honor to study with you, Zatara.
But to what end? Three months ago you appeared on my doorstep with no interest in performing.
And yet dying to become an escape artist.
And for some reason, I wound up teaching you secrets I'd never shown another magician.
You could've sent me away.
No.
There was something inside you I had no right to deny.
Something deep and painful.
After all, I would be foolish to assume I was the only one with secrets.
Eh, John Smith? Thanks for everything, sir.
I'll miss you, John.
And so, I trust, will Zatanna.
Hi, Daddy.
Good night, children.
I thought you'd be finishing the tour with us.
I'm leaving for Japan tomorrow.
There's still a lot I have to learn.
Boy, that's you.
One big serious schoolboy.
No time in your life for fun or magic.
Here, pick a card.
I'll tell your future.
I see emotion, intensity two of hearts.
Joker.
Oh, it's a dumb trick anyway.
Look, I don't know the future, but I know I'll see you again someday, Zanna.
You're the only one who ever calls me Zanna.
I really hate it.
No goodbye hug? See.
It's not so bad.
- I'll write you.
- No, you won't.
- I promise.
- You can't.
I locked your hands to the wall.
What? Looks like someone's missing their plane tomorrow.
If you were any kind of escape artist you'd be out of those cuffs and through the door by now.
Now you see him, now you don't.
Thank you.
You know I have this little problem with money.
Seems like it disappears before I even make it.
And here to help demonstrate are Mr.
Irving Fauncewater director of the Gotham Mint, and noted magic debunker Dr.
Montague Kane.
Welcome, gentlemen.
Miss Zatanna.
This is so exciting.
Let me guess, first time on stage, Irv? Nothing like enthusiasm, right, folks? The way they're responding, one would think your ridiculous stunt's going to work.
Just to clue you in, Monty here makes a living exposing magicians' secrets.
Simple tricks and nonsense.
And I've invited him here to find the secret of the feat I'm attempting tonight.
There is no secret.
What you're proposing is flat-out impossible.
Well, kids, impossible is what I'm all about.
Mr.
Fauncewater, open the doors, please.
Ten million dollars and the means to make it.
Take a good look, because you know what they say about money: Easy come easy go! Oh, my.
Bravo, my dear.
It was a pleasure to be proven wrong.
Thank you, Monty.
And now, just so Irv doesn't have a fit, I'll bring it back good as new.
The money.
Where's the money? "Where's the money," he says.
It's right there, isn't it? It's gone.
What have you done with it? Now take it easy, Irv.
I'm sure there's a perfectly logical explanation.
I'm sure the audience would like to hear it.
- As would the police.
- Now, wait a minute.
Police, police! The police are coming.
It's a trick, an illusion.
I don't know what went wrong but if we can all just calm down for a second You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say can be used against you This never happens to me in Vegas.
She's been set up.
Obviously, but as she's the only suspect, the police must hold her.
Giving the real thief time to escape.
I can't let that happen.
And more important, you can't desert an old friend.
- Nice car.
- Thanks.
I didn't love the idea of spending the night in jail but this makes me a fugitive.
I believe I'm looking at prison time now.
I heard about the mint robbery.
I can prove you didn't do it.
Why do you care about some leggy dame in nylons? Or have I answered my own question? If you want to go it alone No, no.
I'm sorry.
I'm having a bad day.
I'm sure whoever framed you knew how your trick was done.
They may have left a clue at the mint.
- This place is surrounded by cops.
- Just relax.
That's where the money was.
Look.
This line was recently scraped into the floor.
Whatever made it left shards of glass too.
That would have been one mighty big piece of glass.
Or mirror.
Like the one you used to reflect the hologram of the vanished mint.
Oh, sure, take all the mystery out of life.
I think the money was stolen before you got here.
The thief reflected a hologram of the cash while you did your trick.
Then quickly hid the mirror when it was over.
How'd he get rid of a mirror that big? He didn't.
It's still here.
Who's in here? Hold it.
Stay where you are.
Only another magician could have rigged that trick.
Or someone who knows their methods.
Like Montague Kane.
He's been ripping off illusionists for years.
I thought I finally had a trick even he couldn't expose.
Wrong.
I'll settle with Kane.
Meantime, I'd better drop you someplace safe.
Oh, no.
Kane played me for a sap, and I'll see him go down for it.
All right, but it could be dangerous.
Sure there's no one you want to call first? Friends, family, a husband, maybe? Me? Who's got time for a relationship when you pull rabbits out of a hat 52 weeks a year? Besides, someone's got to keep the old act going now that dad's gone.
- I'm sorry.
- Why? I saw him perform when I was younger.
He was great.
Thanks.
You know I have the weirdest feeling we've met before.
I just have that kind of face.
It would seem I have guests.
Come in, and join me by the fire.
Come, come.
Don't be shy.
You've obviously unraveled my little scheme and I would congratulate you face to face.
You're not going to have a face when I'm done with you.
You slimy It's a trap.
A trifle clichéd, I know, but effective nonetheless.
And while you briefly savor your fleeting triumph I am winging toward more comfortable surroundings.
Adieu.
- I have an idea.
- Oh, I would hope so.
This way.
I always did know how to make an exit.
Unfortunately, so did Kane.
And while you briefly savor your fleeting triumph I am winging toward more comfortable surroundings.
Adieu.
Come on.
The show's not over yet.
Take a last longing look, gentlemen.
We're heading to a place where the climate's warmer, the people friendlier and the extradition laws are nonexistent.
The only place you're heading is a prison cell.
Well done, Batman.
You not only eluded my trap, but solved my clue as well.
Get rid of him.
Oh, Monty.
You fell for the second-oldest trick in the book.
And here's the first.
Keep your distance, detective.
You are most engaging, my dear.
Beautiful, impetuous.
I could be persuaded to spare you, if properly implored.
Bring them both! With all reverence for the departed, Zatara himself couldn't escape those locks.
Still, between the two of you, you might be able to loosen a few chains before you hit the water.
Take my hand.
Scared? That makes two of us.
- Trust me, Zanna.
- Zanna? Quick, in my glove.
Farewell, my dear Zatanna.
We could have been magic.
Incredible.
Stop firing, you fools! Get rid of him.
Don't you know? A magician never does the same trick twice.
So you never wrote.
I meant to.
Really.
Hey, it's okay.
I can see you've been busy.
- Just answer an old friend one question.
- Shoot.
What happened that made you put this on? A painful memory.
And a promise.
I'd say you're keeping that promise pretty well.
And for what it's worth, Dad would have been proud of you tonight.
You too.
Can I give you a ride?