Drake and Josh (2004) s02e01 Episode Script

The Bet

ÿþI gotta say I am really glad Drake's my new stepbrother.
I am really glad someone invented pizza.
Oh, and bikinis.
Yes, bikinis are cool.
But, when you have a brother around the same age as you sometimes it gets a little compatitive.
Last week Josh challenged me to see who could hold his breath the longest.
We had a contest to see who could hold his breath the longest .
.
After 2 minutes .
.
I won.
I lost .
.
unconsciousness.
I was breathing through my nose the whole time.
Oh, and then there was this milk challenge.
I bet Josh my pocket money that he couldn't chug an entire gallon of milk.
But He did it.
I lost.
I vomited.
- He puked.
It was worth it.
- It was worth it.
Yes, you ain't no competition for Joshie.
i /i Down now,.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And .
.
i /i there he is! Switching to handheld! Yeah,look out, red turtle shell.
You missed me, fool.
Sweet.
I'm so late.
Hey can one of you boys do me a favor? Megan is down the street playing at Eddies house.
and it's about to pour down rain.
So, one of you guys needs to take this umbrella over there and walk her home.
Okay? Here is the umbrella.
Thanks guys! Josh, you'd better take that umbrella and go get Megan.
Okay! See you when you get back with Megan! Joshie is gonna catch you! Jump on the mushroom.
I'll jump on the mushroom when it's mushroom jumping-time! Hello.
Hello.
- Oh yes, this is for you.
What up with that? One thing .
.
.
.
.
.
I ask you guys to do one thing for me.
Look at Megan! She is wet.
Everyone can see I am wet you boob.
You were too busy to go get your sister .
.
but you weren't too busy to play video games all day? Or swollowing £ 20 of junk food? I keep telling you they are bad people.
Well do you have anything to say for yourself? Well .
.
You see I view this incident as a learning experience.
Upstairs.
Both of you.
You are grounded tonight.
But it's Saturday night.
I am supposed to meet Brian Harowitz at the Magic Palace.
Go apologize to you sister and thenboth of you upstairs.
Sorry.
- I'm sorry.
You do realize that this is your fault.
- No.
I do not realize that.
Could you not stop playing your video game for 10 minutes to take her that stupid umbrella .
.
First: That umbrella is not stupid.
My uncle bought it for me at Seaworld.
Just face it josh.
You're addicted to video games.
I'm not addicted to them I'm in love in them.
Oh how sad.
Not as sad as being addicted to junk food.
Which you are.
Man, you know how bad this stuff for you? Ooh, look at me, I'm Josh! I play video games all day! Girls? No thank you, ma'am.
I have got me video games.
Ooh, I'm Drake! Nutrition? Not for me! I just eat the good old bag of cheese balls! Which you're allergic to.
Besides, food is a necessity.
Video games have no value.
Video games teach hand and eye coordination.
Which is why I now have cat-like reflexes.
Yes, dead cat-like reflexes.
I wasn't ready.
Besides .
.
I can quit video games a lot easier.
.
.
.
than you can quit junk food.
Oh, really? Smell that, Josh? Smells like a bet to me? No, I smell .
.
you losing a bet.
- Okay, hop head.
fine.
You give video games, I give up junk food.
The first one to gave looses.
Okay.
What happens when you lose? When you lose .
.
you have to, uh .
.
dye your hair pink.
- Alright.
The loser has to dye his hair pink.
So,start right now? - Yeah, we are starting right now.
Or we could start in the morning.
-Morning works.
That's the contract? - Yep,spell check and everything.
Can not play video games .
.
- Can not eat junk food of any kind .
.
and whoever loses .
.
must die? - Must die? his hair pink.
sign please.
Sign here .
.
and here .
.
Not there you boob, here.
Signature here .
.
one more initial here.
Perfect.
Stupid sky.
You wanna fit? Fine! Tring.
It's for you! There! Who fits now? Hey josh So .
.
How's the bet going? - Horrible.
I gotta find something to replace video games or I'm gonna explode! Try exercising.
This is no time for jokes, Megan.
Gotta play video games.
Cann't play videogames.
Microwave .
.
Josh likeeeee.
Warm, warm, defrost, defrosting.
Ice breaking, warm, grater, liquefaction, grinding.
Yes.
Thaw, thawing, stirring, warm .
.
mixing.
Mixing! Yeah.
Ice crushing, roasting, blending, popcorn, reheating, defrosting manually! Pathetic.
Oh sweet, sweet cupcakes.
It feels so nice.
I can't eat you now, but don't worry we will be together again soon.
Yes.
I am pathetic.
It's okay, little snacks.
The mean man is gone.
Josh, get up.
Would you watch where you throw things at me? A little to the left and we could had a serious problem.
Dude, can I borrow your toothpaste? - Yes, no problems .
.
What is your problem? Wait .
.
This is gonna sound a little odd.
But uh .
.
Recent change in his Drakes diet probably caused the rash.
Wait a minute .
.
You're saying that he got that rash from not eating junk food? Is that really possible? Sure.
See.
.
.
.
.
.
.
His body was so accoustomed to all the fats, sugar and sodium .
.
that he suddenly stopped results in this hidious facial rash.
No offence.
Well we really appreciate you comeing by, Jeff.
It's nice to have a doctor across the street.
Yeah .
.
Nice for you.
Here is your bill.
$ 300? - Yep.
See ya.
Wait, wait.
What about my hidious facial rash? Well i normally advice my patients to stay away from junk food, but .
.
seen your face i advice that you eat some.
Perhaps a doodle cake.
$ 300.
I cann't believe it.
I mean it makes me .
.
Almost unattractive.
What am I gonna do? Well you heard the doctor.
- Yeah you all.
Bring in the junk food! Joshie won the bet.
Drake will have pink hair.
Hey jostie.
This package just came for you.
It's a present from Grandma.
This day just keeps getting better.
What's she sent you? It's a Game Sphere! - No way .
.
The game Sphere doesn't comes out for about 3 months.
Never underestimate grammy!.
What's a Game Sphere? Only the most sophisticated gaming experience ever created by humans.
And it's spherical.
SPHERICAL! Oh man, I gotta plug this in.
Good.
Because the sec you do, you lose the bet.
You better eat some junk food right now The doctor said so.
No way man.
Ain't gonna happen.
Now go ahead play with your cool new Game Sphere.
No.
It's spherical.
- I know.
But I ain't playing it.
- Then I am not eating junk food.
This is the greatest day of my life.
Why don't you.
.
.
.
uh.
.
put that book down, Drake? Here.
I put it down.
Happy? - EVIL.
Alright, class.
Let's begin.
Behold.
The human eye.
This fascinating organ is the only visible.
.
.
.
.
.
.
- I miss video games so much.
Josh.
The evil dragon has locked me in his castle.
Press B to save me, Josh.
Press Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
I'm pressing it.
Yes, Princess? Please pay attention.
And now, class.
Here is an actual real human eye.
Enough! There is nothing disgusting about the human body.
Drake,put that book down.
Game Sphere.
Game Sphere.
Game Sphere.
Game Sphere.
My face.
My face.
Game Sphere.
Game Sphere.
Game Sphere.
Can you believe them? - I know.
There's no way Josh can keep this up.
Drake gonna win the bet easily.
Are you kidding? Drake's rash is spreading.
He'll gave first.
Do you wanna bet on that? - You are so on.
What do you wanna bet? The loser dies.
.
? .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
his hair pink.
Sign here.
Initials here.
Not there, here.
Signature here.
Oh that's it! the bet is not worth it .
I have to play you.
What are you doing? - I can't take it anymore.
I have to play the Game Sphere.
It's spherical.
Would you look calm? - I can not.
I just cann't handle anymore.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Do it again.
Thank you.
Josh You can win this bet.
You can do it.
I don't think I can.
All you have to do is sabotage Drake.
Make him crack before you do.
Sabotage.
That's good.
That's really good.
You have to sabotage josh.
- Sabotage? Make him crack first.
It is the only way to win the bet.
I like it.
Is this visible? Why is it dark in here? Josh what did you do? - What do you mean, Drake? It's all candy and junk food.
- Yeah.
I suppose it is.
Pillow? - Cotten Candy.
But Josh, how did you do all this, wann .
.
- Shhh.
Don't ask.
Just enjoy.
Nice try Josh, but it's not gonna work.
- But doesn't it all look so good? Not as good as this.
Game Sphere.
- You tease.
i Welcome to Game Sphere.
/i - Hi.
i Prepare for the ultimate gaming experience.
Let's play some games! /i You are killing me here.
- It hurts doesn't it, huh? Chocolate milk.
Big deal.
Chocolate cup.
You got the wireless controller.
- Yep.
Look at me,walking and playing.
I'm playing the Game Sphere.
Marshmallows.
Level 2.
Loving that.
Look, I just warpte.
Man Look at those graphics.
- Everybody loves gummy bears.
Give me that! - Give me that! You gave up! - You gave up! No, you gave earlier and .
.
- You gave earlier and .
.
Guys, guys! - Boys, boys, boys, wait! Get off.
Boys.
What is going on?! Josh made the room full of candy! - Sphere Drake picked up the Game! And I love candy.
- And there then began to play.
Even my pillow is candy! - And when the Game Sphere talked to me! Then he ate the candy for me.
- It was like: 'Hey Josh'.
And then Josh gave up! - Then he gave Drake! You gave first! - You gave earlier! What are you talking about? You gave earlier! - Come on, man.
You gave earlier! It does not matter who gave first.
What? - What? The contract says: 'Whoever gaves must dye his hair pink.
'.
You both gave, So you both have to do it.
But I .
.
Dad! - Really! I .
.
Mom! You boys signed a contract.
You made a commitment.
You have to honour a commitment.
Yeah, about it.
Mom, you bet on Josh.
Dad, you bet on Drake.
They both lost.
Well, we meant nothing .
.
- Well .
.
You have signed a contract.
- You have to honour a commitment.
Drake Josh You'll be late for school.
Okay, I was wrong.
This is the best day of my life.
Just get in the car.
Seeyou, boys.
Bye.
So When do you think this pink will get off? - I don't know .
.
A few Weeks? Months? School is gonna be rough.
- Oh yeah.
Let's go.
- I'm gonna grab some breakfast.
I'll see you at school.
- Okay.
See ya.
Idiots.
i /i