Ducktales (1987) s02e21 Episode Script

Timephoon!

1 Here in Duckburg, life is like a hurricane? Residents are battening down the hatches for the worst El Pato storm in decades.
- Hey, Louie! - Ah! What? Can you give us a hand? - Yeah, okay.
All right, okay.
- Huh? Mr.
Chunky's Extra Chunky Chili Chunks.
We could be stuck here for days.
You said we should have plenty of food we won't get sick of.
I said won't get sick from and you know it.
I doubt your mother would approve of the nutritional What? Chili cheese dogs put the "hooray" in "hooraycane party.
" It's no big deal.
Until we're on day eight of nothing but chili cheese dogs and we all get scurvy.
Again.
Beakley, you gotta let kids be kids.
Don't sweat the small stuff.
Is this your parenting strategy or things you read off a bumper sticker? Honk if you're a great mom.
Honk! Honk! Nothing, I swear! Hey, Hue! Why don't you tell everybody what you're up to in great length? I'm almost done with my comprehensive report on caveducks.
After months of research, I've written my masterpiece.
This is my chance to get an entry into the new edition of the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook.
My brother's gonna be a professional nerd.
We need to bring in all these valuable heirlooms from the garage before the storm hits.
I'm sorry, valuable? These are the famous canes of Clan McDuck.
Going all the way back to our very earliest ancestors.
Oh.
Sentimental value.
Yuck.
Anyway, I've got important, um, stuff to take care of in my room.
- So hm - That boy's up to something.
Whoops! Launchpad, why don't you go and keep an eye on Louie upstairs? Far away from here.
No problem, Mr.
McDee! Hey, Louie! Wait up! Louie? Launchpad, I can explain.
You've got your own tub?! Lucky! Theme song plays Life is like a hurricane here in Duckburg Race cars, lasers airplanes, it's a duck-blur Might solve a mystery or rewrite history DuckTales, whoo Everyday they're out there making DuckTales, whoo Tales of derring-do, bad and good luck tales, whoo D-d-d danger lurks behind you There's a stranger out to find you What to do Just grab on to some DuckTales, whoo Everyday they're out there making DuckTales, whoo Tales of daring, bad and good Not pony tales or cotton tales, no, DuckTales, whoo DUCKTALES (2017) Season 02 Episode 20 Episode Title: "Timephoon" Step into the future of treasure hunting: the past.
Borrowing Gyro's Time Tub here, the keen minds at Louie Incorporated can track down famous lost treasures at the exact moment before they were lost! Bubba! Whoa! No risking time, resources, or, you know, our lives navigating dangerous temples filled with curses and booby traps like this poor fellow.
Whoa! And because these treasures were never found, taking them doesn't affect the timestream! Just bwamp to the past, take the artifact Whoa! and return home a little bit richer.
Time Treasures, a subsidiary of Louie, Inc.
: It's not a crime if it's lost to time.
Any questions? Keeping in mind, again, that it is not a real tub and cannot be used for bubble baths.
And so the simple caveduck gave way to more advanced What was that? I think I see something out there.
- Let's check it out.
- Come back! The storm is starting! Eh, what are they gonna find out there? A little rain? Some debris? Hey, cool! A dead guy! - A caveduck! - Aw! Hey, little guy! Ooh! Maybe he was frozen in an iceberg And the iceberg melted, and he was washed ashore with the storm! Frozen in an iceberg.
Preposterous.
- It happened to you twice.
- Hm.
A real live caveduck! He could prove my report is accurate to the Junior Woodchuck Council and guarantee my entry gets in the new guidebook! - Great! - And possibly disrupt all of time.
Oh.
But it's one little caveduck.
Small problems can turn into big problems if not prevented early.
- Step on a butterfly in the past - Dude! Why would you step on a butterfly? That's sick, lady.
Sick.
- It's a hypothetical situation.
- Good.
Keep it that way.
Kids, take him to the TV room before the butterfly basher here gets to him.
No, no, I We'll deal with these crises in order of importance: strange storm first, caveduck second.
History is alive! I made this shelter based on cave paintings from your time.
I couldn't find any mastodon fur so I improvised.
Just like home, huh? No, you're right.
Cozy blankets are no substitute for mastodon fur.
- Hey! - Mm! He's got a hat like a person! Webby! Please, this is serious.
Duckus lopithicus is not a joke! He doesn't understand your funky fresh ways.
I've reconstructed some rudimentary caveduck language.
Ooh! Ooga! Ah, ah! Oh! Buh-buh Bubba! Bubba! Maybe Bubba is his name! Hi, I'm Wubba! That's ridiculous.
He can't understand modern language, Webby.
I'll offer him some tree bark and leaves as a peace offering.
Mm! Bubba grubba! Caveducks do not eat cheese dogs! - They do now! - Man, I am learning so much.
Here, here, here! At least try the bark! The problem with being this successful is finding enough closets to hide your loot.
So we're not doing anything wrong because we're finding lost treasures.
But before they were lost.
So we're finding found treasures? Is that stealing? First of all, those pirates never reclaimed their treasure and also they were pirates! Doesn't it just break your heart to think of all this treasure, alone in the ground? - Unloved? - So it's kinda like we're saving it? It is exactly like that.
I've planned for every possibility.
There is no way that Time Treasures, a subsidiary of Louie Inc.
, has any side effect whatsoever.
- Whoa! - Stop! He shouldn't be exposed to wheels for another 10,000 years! Louie, we've got a new brother! He's a caveduck and his name is Bubba.
- I'm sorry, what's this now? - Wanna hear his theme song? Bubba, Bubba That's all I got.
Whoa! Whoa! Bubba flubba? Ooh, that's good.
Lyrical genius, this guy! Bubba! Della, clearly you can see there is a problem here.
Kids, if you're gonna let the caveduck skateboard in the house he should be wearing a helmet.
Problem solved.
Good parenting, Della.
Whoa! Oh! Bubba tubba! Bubba tubba! - Oh, what does "tubba" mean? - Oh, nothing! Just caveduck nonsense.
Shut ubba, man! Oh! If the caveduck is here, are we in the past? Don't think too about it too hard, okay? It's one little caveduck.
This will have no effect on the timeline.
Probably.
- Ahh! - Hey, it's those pirates.
Okay, it might have a tiny effect on the timeline.
The El Pato storm has merged with a terrifying time vortex that local reporters are calling a "Timephoon.
" The Timephoon has unsurprisingly localized itself above McDuck Manor.
For more, we go to our guest weatherman Benjamin Frankloon? As history's foremost meteorologist, what the devil is this box?! Is it stealing my soul?! Back to you, Roxanne.
We need to find the cause of this Timephoon.
Did anyone touch a cursed artifact? Or make some kind of improperly worded wish? Shush.
Chrono-protocol suggests that someone is tampering with the timestream at specific points.
But who? And how? This could be any of the time shenanigans we've dealt with lately.
- Why assign blame? - Louie's right.
It's not like we haven't faced pirates before.
Each new arrival adds to the rift.
The more contemptible continuumcrashers arrive, the worse the storm gets.
Ah-ha.
So you're saying we have to stop these small problems now so they don't get out of hand and cause big problems later.
I see how you turned this into a lesson on parenting and I am impressed.
Perhaps Gyro has some Time Tech left that will help us identify what's causing this.
Uh, I love where your head's at, Uncle Scrooge! Oh, too bad we can't go ask him.
You know, 'cause of the storm.
Someone stole my Time Tub and destroyed time and space! Oh, boy.
Ugh, where did he go? Ooh, ooh! Ooga! Ooga! I don't think he speaks your made-up caveman language.
It may actually be a little offensive.
He is offensive to the field of anthropology! He doesn't act at all like the caveducks I've researched.
Maybe, and hear me out here, um, your research is wrong? Don't hurt me! My research? Wrong? No, no, no, no, no.
The caveduck is wrong.
He understands modern language, has mastered the wheel, enjoys processed meats.
He's far too advanced! Advanced is right.
Did you see his finger progression on that solo? This is your chance to find out the real truth.
Isn't that what the Junior Woodchucks are all about? Fine! I'm gonna observe him so hard.
Come here, you historical abomination! Start from the beginning.
Okay.
I was in my lab, definitely not cloning an army, when there was a sudden flash! I turned around and my Time Tub was gone! I was caught in the after-blast.
That's a thing?! I mean, go on.
And hurtled through time and space to this very moment! And then the thief disappeared into the timestream.
He could be anywhen.
Ugh, we'll never find him! The thief must be bringing items from the past here.
That's why the storm is dumping people from those time periods on your doorstep.
The Time Tub and the thief are in this house! It's not me.
I just got here.
Said the clone.
Every treasure brought something back with it! Put it all back! So we need to find a master thief capable of breaking into - both the lab and the mansion.
- It's one of the kids.
- Absolutely.
I'll get Dewey.
- What? Ah! Ninjas! Worse than termites.
Cannae ever get them out of the rafters.
I'll spook him down.
The kids couldn't have done this! - Oh! - I'm sure they didn't mean to.
I'm sorry, I don't yell at them for every little thing, but they're good kids! Even good kids do dumb things and we have to make sure those dumb things don't turn into bad things, like destroying all of existence.
There are Spanish freedom fighters on the roof.
- Are you certain? - Vive la revolution! Oh, no.
They may be French.
Ugh! That was close.
- Don't ask.
- Don't ask.
We have to put back all the treasures before anyone knows it was us.
But if we put things back in the past, doesn't that mean we've already done it in the present? Did I leave this chili cheese dog for myself because I knew I'd be hungry? - Ugh.
Move! - Thank you, past and/or future me! Oh! Ooh! Bubba! Okay.
Duckus lopithicus seems to prefer the vegetarian chili, suggesting a preference for foraging over hunting? Ha! Bubba chubba.
I hate this.
What's out there? A Roman phalanx? A horde of Huns? Aw, it's just a dinosaur.
Bubba's a caveduck, he can take care of it! That's impossible! Dinosaurs lived millions of years before caveducks.
And he's riding it.
Great.
Okay.
I admit, this is a big problem.
- How do we stop it, Mrs.
B? - Well, first we should Mrs.
B! - Beakley! - Granny! Bubba trubba? - Mrs.
B! - Granny! Oh! Ah! Whoa! - Beakley? - She's been lost in the past! The storm's not just blasting things here, it's blasting us back! - Ah! - Yeehaw! Matey! Hey! Mind the carpet with those muddy tires! We have to send back all of these orological outliers! - Gyro, find that Time Tub! - On it! Ah! I've immediately failed you! Ha! Yah! - Whoa! - Argh! - Howdy, partner.
- Where's your brother? Where's Louie?! The bejeweled bell goes back to the Pennyfarthing Society in the 1920s.
Gold railroad spike to the 1880s? Wait, does this go to Queen Elizabeak? Or those shinobi warriors? Gah! I can't keep it all straight! I got to thinking that time isn't a straight line at all.
Perhaps it's like a propeller, always in motion, its blades in all places at once.
- Launchpad, we don't have time! - Well, technically we Louie? Are you okay? Mom, I can explain.
Louie! Ah! Ah! Argh, me scurvy! Ah! Eee! We cannae let anyone else get hit with that blasted lightning or we won't know where they've gone! It's actually when they've gone.
Argh! You don't want to hurt people.
We can be friends.
I'll call you Tootsie! Bubba clubba! Technically, you shouldn't have discovered clubs until What am I complaining about? This is awesome! Go, you freak of history, go! You're overreacting.
I put everything back! It's no big deal! This is a huge deal! Beakley's lost to time! And if I'd listened to her about this and put my foot down earlier, none of this would have happened.
Listen, Ms.
Dee.
I can explain.
You see, time is Uh, nope.
Lost it.
Everything we do has already happened! Whoa! Oh! Bubba tubba! Time to send these unwanted house guests home! - Uncle Scrooge! - Uncle Scrooge! It's okay! I know how to fix this! How are we going to get all these anomalies into that tiny tub? One of several things I'll know, any second now! Yes! - Ah! - Kids! No! - Louie, hurry! - Mom! Uh! I hope this works! Bubba! Ah! - Oh! - Ah! You're back? - Whoa! - You're back! I am so, so sorry.
This'll be good.
I thought I had a foolproof, get-rich-quick plan, but it turns out I was the fool.
Can you guys ever forgive me? - Okay.
- You know we can.
- We always do.
- You know, it's fine, classic Louie.
- Yeah, of course.
Bring it in.
- I'm sure you've learned something.
No.
Not this time.
What? But I really am sorry.
We hugged and everything! I watched your brothers blink out of existence because you wanted a shortcut to riches.
- I said I was sorry.
- You took off in that contraption without thinking about the consequences or the people you would hurt.
I wonder who I got that from.
- Oh! - See here, young man Your little scheme to bypass the present almost cost us our future.
This all stops NOW.
You are grounded.
No schemes.
No treasures.
And Louie, Incorporated is done, understand? Look, let me clean up, okay? Uncle Scrooge? - Mrs.
B, come on! - To your room! Stupid perfect scheme.
That was hard.
Well, it always is.
But a little tough love now will make them better people later.
- You think? - It just worked on you, didn't it? Hm.
I'm not cleaning any of this up.
- That is fair.
- Launchpad, you okay? I went to the future.
I've seen how the world ends.
It was neat.
See ya there soon! Ah! The Woodchucks got my report! I'm proud of you, Huey, you wrote about real caveducks.
The Junior Woodchuck Guide will be a better book for it.
Rejected? "Wildly outlandish?" Some people just aren't ready for the truth.
Where did the cane of the First of Clan McDuck go? Bubba must have taken it with him.
Wait, you don't think Bubba is? He was pretty advanced.
Tougher.
Smarter.
- Sharper.
- That's crazy.
Ooh, Bubba Bubba.
Sync corrections by srjanapala Theme music plays