DuckTales (2017) s01e22 Episode Script

The Last Crash of the Sunchaser!

1 C'mon! [GRUNTING.]
All set! [GLASS BREAKS.]
Next stop, Monacrow! Home to EX.
C.
E.
S.
S.
, the EXtreme Consumer Electronics and Science Symposium! Experimental race cars! Lasers! - Airplanes? - You bet, old friend.
And Monacrow is said to be the final resting place of the elusive Maltese MacGuffin! Lost during Netherworld War II, this ephemeral heirloom is so rare that no one has ever laid eyes upon it.
Whoa.
So what is it exactly? The stuff dreams are made of.
No, but, like, is it a statue or [QUACKS.]
Come on, Uncle Donald! You can fix the houseboat when we get back.
Uh-uh.
I'm almost done.
We'll be on the water again in two days! - [CRASH.]
- Aak! Seven days! [EXPLOSION.]
[SIGHS.]
I should get started.
No rush! Granny? You're coming too?! I have 987 vacation days saved up, and Monacrow's Blackwater Beaches are legendary.
It's high time I "wilded out" with some "maxing" and "relaxing," hmm? I have the coolest grandma.
Sure.
Now who's ready for the Best road trip ever! [OFF-KEY.]
Best road trip ever! Oh! You'll get it.
[CHUCKLES.]
Six months ago, if you'd have told me I should take in a group of youngins - I did.
- I woulda called ya daft.
But I tell you, I haven't felt this energized and vital since Well, a long time.
Load up, everyone! Psst! Psst! Hey! Did you get it? - [SCROOGE.]
Come on, kids! - [ENGINE STARTS.]
To our greatest adventure yet! [ALL.]
Whooo! To adventure! Life is like a hurricane Here in Duckburg Race cars, lasers, airplanes It's a duck-blur We might solve a mystery Or rewrite history Ducktales, whoo-ooh Every day they're out there making Ducktales Whoo-ooh Tales of derring-do Bad and good-luck tales Whoo-ooh D-d-danger lurks behind you There's a stranger out to find you What to do? Just grab on to some Ducktales Whoo-ooh Every day they're out there Making Ducktales Whoo-ooh Tales of daring bad and good Not phony tales or cottontails - No, Ducktales! - Whoo-ooh! - [SIGHS.]
- Sorry, Mrs.
B.
Only seat I could find.
Seatbelts? Oh.
Um When we crash, it can be used as a floatation device! When we crash? Long time since you've been in the field, - eh, Agent 22? - [DEFLATING.]
And this plane would have been dangerously outdated even then.
I'm counting 1, 2, 3, 14 safety violations.
Aw, come on.
Every time the Sun Chaser goes down, she always gets right back up in the air.
"Every time"? I allow the children to travel with you because I assume you're keeping them safe.
Ach, jings! Launchpad, give the old bird a tour of the old bird to show her there's nothing to worry about.
I'll take the wheel-stick thingie.
Sorry, when did you learn to fly a massive cargo plane? Please, I'm Scrooge McDuck.
If Launchpad can do it, how hard can it be? Not very! Our tour starts down at the tummy of the plane.
Let me know if this gets too technical.
[KNOCKS.]
I sweetalked Quackfaster down at Scrooge's secret archives.
That lady is nuts! And I got her to give us this.
Start at the corners and work inward.
No, Huey.
Each mysterious piece holds a secret.
Listen closely, and they'll tell you where they go.
It goes there.
Okay.
So what do we got? The documents shredded on the week we were born.
According to the note we found in Castle McDuck, that date is connected to The Spear of Selene.
The mysterious unknown thing your mom took from Scrooge.
Somewhere in these pieces are the answers Scrooge doesn't want us to find.
What is the Spear of Selene? Why didn't Scrooge and Donald talk for years? What happened to our mom? Nothing can stop us n Oh! Oh, come on! Where's the last piece?! It's gotta be here somewhere.
- [PAPER RUSTLING.]
- [GASPS.]
There! Aha! Nothing can stop us - Get the thing, get the thing! - Stop milking the moment! - [ENGINES STRAINING.]
- Whoa! [ALL SCREAMING.]
Where'd it go?! What just happened? Where are the children? Quick! If they find out we're researching his darkest secret, Scrooge'll shut down our investigation for good! [KIDS WHISTLING INNOCENTLY.]
Are you children all right? Inconspicuous whistling.
Just a casual whistle.
[ENGINE TRYING TO START.]
Oh! You anti-aeronautical patchwork contraption! Will you fly already! McDuck! I leave you alone for two minutes, and you crash the plane! If we crashed, then why are we still in the air? [GOOSE CALLING.]
[KIDS WHIMPERING.]
Of all the irresponsible Not even a real crash.
Oh, quit your haverin'.
It's just a teeny 10,000-meter speed bump.
I'll have us safely on the trail of the Maltese MacGuffin by morning, or my name isn't Scrooge Mc Waah! [KIDS.]
Aaaahhhh! [GROANS.]
[STRAINS.]
Whoa-oh-oh! Aaaah! Noo! [STRAINING.]
- [GROANING.]
- Wha oh! And you've blown out an engine.
Oh, it happens all the time.
Right, Launchpad? Yes.
But usually I crash, like, two seconds later.
We have to get out and figure out how to get down.
And pass up the adventure of a lifetime?! And risk all our lives?! Ah, you're safe as houses! This is nothing! The plane could be on fire.
Or we could be on fire.
Or this could be a volcano! Everything could be on fire! This is a flagrant breach of training, protocol, and just basic safety precautions! Is this what you're doing when you take the family on road trips? - Achh, you're overreacting.
- I have no idea - why you thought this was a good idea.
- You're a hysteric! [ON P.
A.
.]
We seem to have hit some, um, turbulence in the cockpit here.
Everything's fine.
Please enjoy our in-flight entertainment.
[JAZZY SAX THEME TO "DARKWING DUCK" PLAYING.]
Now what? Now that! We'll use the jeep's engine to jumpstart the Sun Chaser's propeller, and we'll be on our way.
What could be safer? Calling for help.
Climbing down on our own.
Not starting a car inside of a plane! We've got to get that piece without anyone noticing.
We'll need some kind of distraction.
[SIGHS.]
Fine.
Follow my lead.
[SOCKET WRENCH RATCHETING.]
[SCROOGE MUTTERING.]
Ha! All set up here, Mr.
McDee! See here, Bentina.
I have taken these children on countless adventures, and they have never once had cause to worry about their safety.
Uncle Scrooge? We're worried about our safety.
Now, Louie, I have always looked out for you.
Why worry now at such a potentially embarrassing moment for me? I know we've been in tough spots before, but this one seems really tough.
He's right.
Given the altitude, the condition of the plane, and the weather patterns, we have a 1 in 17 million chance of surviving.
Wait, really?! I mean, yeah! Scaaary! And usually on our expeditions, there's some kind of curse or villain that you can outwit.
But you can't outwit gravity.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, that That's right! We're all gonna die! We're worried about our safety! We gotta go! Now now now! - Now? - No! - [ENGINE REVVING.]
- Aaaaaahhhhh! No! Aah! Huh.
Never crashed a jeep in a plane before.
Into a plane, sure, but [LOUD CREAKING.]
Hmm? - [LAUNCHPAD.]
Ooh! - Launchpad! You need to counterbalance the plane! Everyone to the front! [GRUMBLING.]
Go go go! [STRAINING.]
What is in here? [ALL.]
Nothing! [HATCH WHIRRING.]
Uh, Mr.
McDee? Yaah! Beakley! Secure the hatch! [GROANING.]
Yaah! Aah! Whoa! [GRUNTING.]
[PANTING.]
Aaah! Thanks, Mr.
McDee.
Nothing bad will happen while Scrooge McDuck is around.
[SCOLDING.]
Mr.
McDuck! [SCOLDING.]
Kids! [SCOLDING.]
Mrs.
Beakley! Sorry, I just thought I could keep the blame circle going.
Must you blindly gallivant around with no clue what you're doing? [COUGHING.]
Irony.
If you cannae listen, I can't keep you safe, except, of course, I can, because I am Scrooge McDuck, and I am very good at what I do.
From here on out, you have to stay put! - No! - Stop! [CREAKING.]
There's the missing piece! We just have to get it! Nope! Nuh-uh! Nothing is getting me out of this seat! What if the plane catches fire and we have to evacuate? [STRUGGLING.]
Come on! That puzzle piece may be our best chance to find out why Della disappeared! - Maybe.
- Beg your pardon? It's just, you said that in the archives, and on Ithaquack, and How can we know for sure? By grabbing the piece! Guys, this is the greatest mystery of our lives.
We can't solve it if we're dead! We'll be fine.
Scrooge isn't going to let anything bad happen to us.
Stop moving! See? This couldn't get any worse.
[LAUNCHPAD ON P.
A.
.]
This is your captain.
To take your minds off our potentially grim fate, please enjoy another action-packed Darkwing Duck video! [GLITCHES, THEME SONG REPEATS.]
The tape player seems to have been damaged in the crash.
Enjoy! [BOTH GROANING.]
[GROANS.]
[GRUNTING.]
Here are those dirty laundry bags you wanted, Mr.
McDee.
Launchpad, these are parachutes.
A pair of what now? [SIGHS.]
Mr.
McDuck? Mr.
McDuck.
Scrooge! What?! All I have to do is climb out onto the wing to jumpstart the propeller myself, using these heavy parachutes as counterbalance out the other side of the plane.
Leaving us with no emergency equipment! Please, for the safety of your family, admit you cannot fix this.
Nonsense.
Nothing bad is going to happen to her.
"Her" who? Hmm? The kids.
They'll be thanking us by the time we land.
Launchpad, hand me another parachute.
Launchpad.
Besides, the kids are having the time of their lives.
- [THEME SONG REPEATING.]
- [HUEY HUMMING ALONG.]
[WEBBY AND LOUIE JOINING IN.]
I can't take this anymore! I'm going for it! Dewey, no! [HUEY ON WALKIE.]
Junior Woodchuck Rule 18: every action has an equal and opposite reaction.
I thought that was Newton.
Where do you think he got it from? Science? Okay.
I'll call out the steps.
- Got it? - Got it! Nope.
Bad idea.
Terrible idea.
For Mom.
Ready.
Steady.
Dewey, left.
Step.
Step.
Huey, right.
Step.
Step.
Dewey, right, Huey, left.
Please, we all believe you are a very capable adventurer, all right? Stand down, 22.
I am still your boss.
Ooh! Launchpad! Now! The truth about Della Duck.
Nothing can stop us [WEBBY ON WALKIE.]
Look at the stupid paper already! - Dewey?! - What the blazes What have you got there? Not secrets! [LOUIE ON WALKIE.]
Literally the worst answer you could have given.
Give it here.
[GASPS.]
No! Yah! Unh! Oh! Get back here! You'll get yourself killed! Uh Both of you! Stop speeding through the plane! Aah! [SCROOGE GRUNTING WITH EACH LUNGE.]
[SIGHS.]
That is not what I meant, and you know it.
Leave me alone! Come back here this instant! You three! Counterbalance the weight! [SUN CHASER CREAKING.]
I'm trying to save your life! Now come back here, or I will end it, young man! No! So close! [BOTH STRAINING.]
Unh! Uh! Aah! Yaah! [CRATE SPLINTERING.]
[GASPS.]
Oh, no.
Oh, children.
What have you been up to? Mmm.
Huh? [GASPING.]
Aah! [ALL SHOUTING.]
Waah! [ALL.]
Dewey! No! Lad! Lad! Give me your hand! - [SUN CHASER CREAKING.]
- Ahh No.
Not again.
[WEBBY ON WALKIE.]
Dewey, this is crazy! The mystery's not worth it! [LOUIE ON WALKIE.]
I get it, but you can't give up the rest of us to find the one person we lost! Dewey, the Darkwing Duck video is still running.
Do you want me to pause it until you get back? Gimme that! Dewey, our family is amazing! We're enough.
Let it go! Unh! [GASPS.]
[GRUNTING.]
Ah, no! [SIGHS.]
Please, I I can't keep you safe, all right?! How can I get you to listen to me?! Tell me about the Spear of Selene! [CREAKING.]
[EXHALES.]
It was just before you were hatched.
Your mother, your Uncle Donald, and I had been going on amazing adventures for years, and things were grand.
Except we'd been just about everywhere.
Ever the aviator, your mother devised a plan to explore the greatest uncharted territory of all: outer space! [ALL GASPING.]
Della had already been all over the earth.
She wanted to give you boys the stars.
Donald thought it was too risky, especially with you three on the way.
So I did the only logical thing: I built the rocket and didn't tell Donald or anyone.
It was meant to be a surprise for Della to celebrate your birth.
But your mother was always good at sniffing out surprises.
She found the rocket and decided to go for a little test run in orbit.
Neither of us could have predicted that cosmic storm.
But we both knew a little pangalactic precipitation wouldn't stop her.
After all, she was Della Duck! Curse me kilts, was that girl stubborn! I tried to talk her through it, thought if anyone could make it, it was her.
Until that very last bolt.
I couldn't keep her safe.
The rocket and your mother were lost to the inky abyss of space.
Your Uncle Donald and I never spoke again.
Until you three showed up on my doorstep.
[SNIFFLING.]
[SNIFFLING.]
Cool.
So you're the reason our mom is gone.
What? No, I [CREAKING.]
Um, guys? You built her a crazy-dangerous super-rocket! Which she stole early! Then you encouraged her to keep flying through a cosmic storm?! You could have called her down! There were too many variables! Now, boys, you don't know And you're the richest duck in the world! Why didn't you send up more ships to look for her?! I spared no expense! Yeah, right.
Cheap old Scrooge probably bailed as soon as it put a dent in his Money Bin.
Um, guys? Take it easy, Dewey.
He may have a point.
Even if gifting an experimental rocket to a mother of three was clearly a terrible idea! This is a family matter.
You are not family! See here, McDuck.
You will not speak to my granddaughter that way.
You will not speak to me that way! None of you! After everything I do for you, you're all nothing but trouble! Guys! [ON P.
A.
.]
This is your captain speaking! We are falling! - Wait, what?! - What?! [ALL.]
Aaaaaaaahhh! Huh.
That was weird.
[ENGINES START.]
[LAUNCHPAD.]
Phew! There we go! Back so soon? Well, ta-da! She's all done! Uhh.
What happened to you? We know about the Spear of Selene.
Oh.
Let's go back to the marina.
- Huh? Uh! - [SHATTERS.]
Ohh! Isn't he even going to say goodbye? We're taking those vacation days.
If that's all right with you, sir.
Fine.
Well, you've successfully pushed your family and everyone who cared about you away.
Again.
I hope you're happy.
[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING.]
[LOUIE.]
You're the richest duck in the world! Why didn't you send up more ships to look for her?! [HUEY.]
Then you encouraged her to keep flying through a cosmic storm?! You could have called her down! There were too many variables! [DEWEY.]
So you're the reason our mom is gone.
Cheap old Scrooge probably bailed as soon as it put a dent in his Money Bin.
[BEAKLEY.]
Well, you've successfully pushed your family and everyone who cared about you away.
Again.
I hope you're happy.
I am.

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