Gintama (2005) s01e42 Episode Script

You Know What Happens if You Pee on a Worm

Keep the room well-lit and watch from a distance, okay? Huh? [Gintoki was swallowed up by the alien that grew to a humongous size.
.]
[What is it that Umibozu saw as he searched for Kagura?.]
Kagura! ["You Know What Happens if You Pee on a Worm".]
Kagura! Hey! Get a hold of yourself! You bastards Did you just sit there and watch? After my daughter saved your lives as she grew weaker and weaker Did you just sit there and watch her die? W-W-Wait! In this situation, we couldn't call a doctor, even if we tried Right, Jii? Don't pass it to me! I don't know what happened! I don't know anything! I'm still in shock! Damn you! Pappy, don't.
Not after I saved their lives.
Kagura! It's okay now! Daddy's going to take care of you! You don't have to worry! I've changed, haven't I? My strength is not just for hurting people.
I can protect people too, now, uh-huh.
Don't talk anymore! When I didI made so many friends.
I'm not alone anymore.
The Yato fought, and fought, and destroyed themselves.
The Yato fought, and fought, and found themselves all alone.
Pappy, big brothereveryone The ones we have to fight are ourselves.
If we don'teveryone will be all alone.
Pappy Kagura! Kagura! Ginchan.
Gin-cha Kagura! Gin-chan Damn earthworm monster! Let her go! Or I'llI'll piss on you! Don't do that! Your you-know-what will swell up! Didn't your motherever teach you that? Aren't you a bit late to be showing up now, young man? What brings you here? I love spectacles.
Don't you? Fires, fights and aliens are what Edo is famous for.
All I know isyou're a pain in the ass!! Get lost.
Shut up! At least I still have two arms! My one arm is worth three of yours! Oh yeah?! Well, three of mine are worth six of yours!! You should go home! Go to a hospital and get a new brain to go with your new arm!! If I get a new brain, it'll be to bring one back for you!! And I'm not going to a hospital for just an arm! My left arm was a prosthetic anyways.
Have them make you a prosthetic head while they're at it, you barcode-headed geezer! Stop it! Your reign of terror ends here! Don't let them get into the streets of Edo! Vice-chief! The terminal is coming apart! They're not going to blame us, are they? Who cares? We'll just say that the monster destroyed it.
Viewers, did you hear that? Despite specific orders from the government, the Shinsen- Look at that! The alien is retreating.
We did it! We've won! No, we haven't.
Wh-What's it doing?! The alien is wrapping around the ship! What's happening? What is going on over there? Look! There's someone! Right in the middle of the monster! Amid a maelstrom of jaws, someone is yelling! They're shouting something! Umibozu? That'sUmibozu! And that guy! Out of my way! Or we're gonna piss on you! That's Umibozu? He's like a monster.
No, no Boss is keeping up with his pace! With them there, we can't just carelessly shoot.
They'll be caught in the crossfire Those areBakufu warships.
It's Pops! Old man Matsudaira is here! The god of destruction! Katakuriko Matsudaira! We've got trouble! After that old guy is done, only ashes will be left! He'll take out the entire terminal! Looks like they've finally shown up for their photo op! We've just about taken care of things here.
I've got to hand it to you, punk, for an Earthling, you're pretty good.
That means a whole lot of nothing coming from you, monster.
I'm amazed you fought this far with just one arm.
You only have one arm yourself.
For your own sake, go home.
You'll die if you stay any longer.
I'd love to, but I don't see any exits around here.
I can't figure you out.
You pushed Kagura away, so what are you doing here? Why do all this? I'd like to know the same thing.
Why did I come here? Are you Relax.
I'm not planning on taking that loudmouth brat back with me.
And of course, I'm not planning on dying either.
It's just that I'm not going to let her die.
Interesting.
You're an interesting fellow.
I think I understand why Kagura likes you.
But what can you do with only one arm? You only have one arm, too.
No, no Together, we've got two! It makes me sick to do it, but I'll help you until we rescue Kagura! Count your blessings, Pops.
I see Thanks! What's that? The ship's keel, it's H-Hey, it's Wh-What is that?! The nucleus.
The core of the parasitic alien.
It's the first one I've seen that's this huge.
It's absorbed an excessive amount of the terminal's energy and finally blew right through the ship.
If we smash that, we'll be able to stop this thing.
Ka Kagura! It swallowed her up! We've got a problem We can't kill it now! If we do, Kagura will die.
Attention! All civilians in the terminal vicinity! Leave the area immediately.
We are about to open fire on the alien! Vacate the area immediately.
Wha?! What?! Pops, wait! A civilian child has been sucked into the alien.
Kondo Are you weighing the life of a single civilian with all of Edo? Our mission is to save as many lives as we can.
Would you risk your entire mission for just one of those lives? Don't be a wussy.
But, Pops! Chief, the alien! Damn! It's on the move again.
You see what I mean? That's what happens when you don't listen to me.
But Pops knows best, doesn't he? I'm made up of 80 percent correctness.
You two go on home! You're in our way! Go.
This place will soon be a sea of flames.
Youaren't thinking of doing this alone, are you?! I'm a real loser.
I'm called the fiercest there is, but I can't protect anything.
Not my family Not my only daughter Nothing.
The Yato fought, and fought, and found themselves all alone.
The ones we have to fight are ourselves.
If we don'teveryone will be all alone.
This the price I have to pay for running away for so long.
I'm sorry, Kagura At least let me die together with you.
This is why daughters get mad at their fathers.
Look dad, can't you even trust your own kid? Do you think she's so weak that a little thing like this'll kill her? Five minutes.
Just delay 'em five minutes for me.
I'm not asking you to believe in me.
But At least believe in Kagura.
What're you planning to do?! What a crazy thing to do What're we gonna do, Kondo-san?! Ready the Matsu-Blaster for firing! Commissioner Never mind.
Just fire.
No, it's not that Look at that They didn't leave In fact, there are more of them.
What? You dumb-asses! Can't you see this old guy? If you shoot now, this idiot prince will be blasted to death! You'll have an international incident on your hands! Just wait five minutes, that's all we ask! Sure, what difference could five minutes make? Go make yourself some instant ramen while you wait! Y-You people That girl saved us.
They won't shoot, will they? We'll be all right, won't we? That darn wavy head! If he was intent on coming, he should've said so at the start.
Well, I knew he was going to come, anyway.
I've changed, haven't I? I can protect people too, now, uh-huh.
When I didI made so many friends.
I'm not alone anymore.
Kagura Wake up GiGin-chan Look, I'm gonna eat all your pickled seaweed! Commissioner He's the real thing! The real Prince Hata.
What's he doing there? Oh, is this it? Is this the Matsu-blaster firing button? Uhyeah But we have to quickly rescue him.
Huh? Did you just push that? You're kidding! You just pushed it?! I have to be at my daughter's birthday party at five.
What?! We have to stop it! It can't be stopped! Does it look like they're starting to fire? You're kidding, right? I am a prince, you know! We're in trouble.
We gotta get outta here! That's my pickled seaweed! Kagura! You did it?! Man, that kid sure gets vicious about food.
Did her parents starve her or something? You know what I wonder? Did your parents cut out your brain? Maybe I never had any parents.
That I can believe! Now then, shall we? Let's finish the job.
Let's do it, dad.
Who're you calling "dad"?! Look! The alien is Pops! Stop the attack! There's no need to shoot anymore! Stop? Don't be silly! Kuriko is still seventeen.
She said she wants to celebrate her party alone with her boyfriend.
But she plans on staying out all night.
I absolutely won't allow that.
I'll do everything I can to stop it.
I'll even dance the Lambada on top of her cake.
Not stop as in "stop over"! Can't you think of anything else except your daughter?! Quiet! I can't stop it now, anyway.
Hurry up and get out of there! I won't be responsible for whatever happens to you!! Huh? Run? Where are we supposed to go? My glasses My glasses My glasses Down's no good.
Go up.
Up! Give me back my pickled seaweed! Kagura, pull yourself together.
Stop it, he's bleeding.
She's not fully conscious.
She broke through the nucleus in this condition? This man's voice reached into the depths of Kagura's subconscious.
Ah! Pickled seaweed.
What're you doing?! Pappy's precious hair! Hey! What're you eating?! Spit it out! You'll go bald! You'll go bald if you eat that! Huh? What's that sound? Destructionconfirmed.
Mygod Those guys must be How is that possible? With just an umbrella he blocked the blast.
B-Bozu-san! Looks like I got a bit fired up myself! Your hair is on fire, but Imagine me dyingto save somebody else! H-Hey! Bozu-san! Baldy! Hey, Baldy! BalI mean Bozu-san.
Baldy Baldy, but only on the right! At one point, I really thought it was the end, but I prevailed with my exceptional kara-tay skills.
What're we going to do with this mountain of dead alien flesh? The terminal will be out of service for a while, as well.
No telling what the higher-ups are going to say.
That old man, for chrissake But that monster was every bit what the rumors said he was.
I mean Umibozu Umibozu.
To tell the truth, I was way more scared of him than the alien.
Really? He didn't look like a monster to me.
He just looked like any father, struggling to protect his daughter.
A father just like any other around here, having trouble with his daughter.
Did you find what you were looking for, Umibozu-dono? How's Kagura? She's being treated by the rescue team.
Her injury was pretty serious.
Shouldn't you get treated, too? I told you, my left arm was a prosthetic from the start.
I just need to get a new one.
Not your armyour brain.
What do you mean? You know what I mean.
Oh, in that case, I'll kill you.
Now, I'm missing not only my arm, but my hair, too It'll grow back in time.
Arms don't grow back.
Not your arm Your hair.
I see My hair, eh? All you talk about is my hair.
I'll kill you.
But anyway, both of them serve as a lesson to me.
A lesson? I lost it to my own kid, you see.
Not Kagura.
I have an older kid, too.
That one's a real bad egg.
Nonot bad, let's just say he faithfully carried the blood of the Yato Clan.
He's a kid who's the personification of the fighting spirit.
A long time ago, the Yato clan had a terrible custom called "Parent Killing.
" It was a savage practice where a person's worth was determined by surpassing their parents.
These days, that practice has all but disappeared, but he tried to revive it.
He tried to take the head of the legendary Umibozu.
Surprised? That's what we Yato are like.
When it happened, I suddenly realized Squaring off with my own son, who was going for my neck That I wasn't trying to stop him I was trying to kill him.
If Kagura hadn't stopped me, I would have murdered him for sure.
Even now, I can't forget the fear I saw in her eyes.
After that, I couldn't go near my home.
I was afraid that Kagura would one day seek my life as well.
I was overwhelmed with the fear, that if she did, I would not be able to suppress the beast inside of me.
I didn't have the courage to change, or to trust myself, so I ran away, leaving young Kagura and her dying mother behind.
I was afraid of destroying my family, but in the end, not a trace of my family remains.
I came all this way, because I didn't want Kagura to go through the same thing I did.
But I almost repeated the same mistake.
When you told me, it hit me.
It was Kagura who stopped me then, and it was always Kagura who supported me.
That's how she is, and yet I couldn't even trust her one bit.
I thought I saw myself in Kagura.
But Kagura and I are different.
She's She's a lot stronger than I am.
But I-I'm a total failure as a father.
Nomaybe I'm the only one who thinks I'm a father.
Maybe she doesn't even think of me as her father.
A letter She always wrote them in secret.
Since you had no permanent address, they were always sent back to my place.
I secretly kept all of them in my closet hoping if I ever got the chance to hand them to you This is the only one I have right now.
Oh, and don't worry, I'd never do anything so crass as to read them.
I figured you're not the typeto read this and go nuts about it.
See you later.
Hey! I don't know all the details, but If you have a parent who cares about you, what more do you need? I wish I had one A family like yours.
Gin Ironic, ain't it? How the people who don't have thingsusually understand them better than the ones who do.
Socherish her Okay? Let me make this clear.
I'm staying at the Odd Jobs for good.
You can think of me as family.
Didn't he say he was quitting? Cherish her, huh? Hey! Are you listening, Kagura? That's the deal.
From now on Daddy will cherish you.
So be happy, okay? Pappy! Why Wait, Pappy! Dear Father, I haven't seen you in a while.
Are you well? I'm doing fine.
Right now, I am living in a city called Edo with some strange people called samurai.
They are truly strange creatures.
Even though they're usually all weak, hopeless and pathetic, when it really counts, they call on some idea called "Bushido" and become these tough, noble warriors.
And they have something in common with the Yato.
They're all fighting against themselves.
I think if I stay here I can change.
I think I can become a person who doesn't give in to herself.
If I do change, Pappy I want you to take me with you on your travels.
My dream is to travel through the universe with youand become the top alien hunter in the galaxy.
Love, Kagura.
I'll be waiting, Kagura.
[Preview.]
[The Look.]
Next time, now that Kagura is gone, I'll be the heroine! [The Figure.]
[The Character.]
["Make Characters So Anybody Can Tell Who They Are by Just Their Silhouettes".]
[A fight breaks out over who will be the next heroine.
.]
[Otae vs.
Sachan vs.
Catherine, and even Otose!.]

Previous EpisodeNext Episode