Lexx s02e17 Episode Script

The Net (2)

I am the Lexx, The most powerful destructive weapon in the two universes Lexx 2.
17 The Net Stanley? Oh! Xev What are you doing here? I'm looking for my hat, what do you think I'm doing? Well, I don't think you'll find it in the shower.
Oh, that's great.
I'm gonna die without my hat.
I mean, we're all gonna die, but at least you guys will be dressed.
Are you taking a shower? What does it look like? Well - actually, it looks pretty good.
Stanley? Turn around, please.
Oh, yeah You know Xev, I could be the last living man in this universe.
I mean, if I'm not now, I soon will be, right? So, er, you know, hmm? The answer is no.
Oh, come on Xev.
It's not on Stan.
Stanley Yes Lexx, I'm coming! Look, Xev, I don't wanna play games with you anymore.
This could be the last chance for both of us.
I know, but that doesn't change how I feel.
Feelings? What, you're saving your feelings for a guy that doesn't even feel anything at all? I mean, I have feelings, real human feelings.
Now just, just think about it Xev.
In two days time we're gonna be at the centre of the universe, where we're probably gonna die, and if we don't buy it there, Mantrid gets us a few days later anyway.
Look Xev, it's just me and you, we're it, we're all that's left! Stan.
Two days left? That's all, yeah that's all! - Stan! - Not now Lexx! We'll talk again when it's down to one.
OK.
Good.
Agreed.
Fine.
OK Lexx - what's up? I would like to change course.
Why? I see a web, Stan.
A what? A big web.
Where? Straight ahead.
Well I don't see anything.
My eyes can see it.
I'm afraid of webs, Stanley.
They could have spiders on them.
Lexx, Lexx, Lexx, Lexx, Lexx.
You are much too big to be worried about spiders - and if you can see so well, why don't you tell me where my hat is, all right? I would like to turn away, Stanley.
Not until somebody tells me where my hat is! I must turn Stanley, before it is too late.
Uh oh.
Uh oh what? Uh oh what, Tweedle? I am going to hit the web, Stanley.
Do something! Lexx - turn now! Stan? Kai? Xev! Sweetness! Are you all right? I'm fine - I think.
How did I get here? Your guess is as good as mine.
I just woke up in my sleep chamber and I don't know how I got there either.
I - I - What? I've got a very bad feeling.
Stan! Xev - I remember sounds, images.
I don't know what they mean, but I know that they are not good.
I fear for you.
Yeah, me too.
Kai?! Somebody - here? Where are you? Stan? Kai? Stan.
Stan, wake up.
Stan - ew! What is that stuff? Security guard slime.
Don't touch him, Xev.
Kill him.
Be quiet 790, I'm not in the mood.
I'm serious Xev - not that I didn't mean it before, but this time I really mean it.
Something strange has happened to Tweedle.
If he lives you will be in great danger! And how do you know that? It's a robot intuition thing.
I've never heard of robot intuition.
It's real, Xev.
I really have it! Well? There is nothing wrong with him physically that I could determine, other than the obvious fact that he is completely and utterly repulsive in every way.
However - Yes? His brain seems to be switched off.
There is no sign of any cognitive activity.
ÓStanley Tweedle is effectively brain dead.
Stan is dead? No.
Yes.
Although his body seems quite alive.
I would like to point out that for Stanley Tweedle, being brain dead is not a particularly significant change of state from normal.
Keep at it 790.
We have to find out what's wrong with him, and you have to do your best.
Where are you going? To see what's happening outside.
Please Xev - stay with me, and stay alive! Please Lexx, open! I need to get out and see where we are! Learn anything? Nothing.
Well, I don't know what else to do, so I'm going to try this Yes! Let's electrocute Stan! It might do something Oh, it will.
A few thousand volts will fry the rest of his nervous system and shut his decaying corpse down for certain.
I recommend it highly.
Don't you feel anything for Stan? Only utter contempt.
All my positive feelings are reserved for you, bowl of perfection.
I don't want to kill Stanley, I just want to jump-start his brain.
It's a win-win situation, Xev.
Either Tweedle awakes and you're happy, or he dies and I'm overjoyed.
Yes, that's it - let him have it! Look! It's just electrical interference.
Don't stop.
Cu - It's just random synapses firing.
Ignore it and give him the juice! No, he's trying to say something! Cu.
.
cor.
.
Kai Stan, Stan, what are you saying? Cucor.
.
Kai Stan.
Slowly.
Take your time and tell me.
Cu Kai Did you say - Kai? Cu cor Kai Call Kai? Kai Cut cord? Cut cord to Kai? Res.
.
yes Stanley! I don't know where Kai is.
Can you tell me? Pa sage.
Passage Passage Main gang gang ganglion.
Parallel passage I can't understand you! I can.
.
He is referring to a passage that runs parallel to the Lexx's primitive primary ganglion.
Res, res, yes.
Hurry - it's killing us.
What Stan, what is killing us? Stanley, what's killing us, tell me! He's still breathing.
That's unfortunate.
We should abort this mission, return to Tweedle and kill him without delay.
You're not being helpful.
Think about it, Xev! Tweedle, a know nothing moron, first makes the unlikely observation that the Lexx's primary ganglion is parallel to this passage, and then relays that information to us in a state of apparent brain death! Don't you find that strange? You always underestimate Stanley.
Impossible.
Kai?! It's a trick.
A Tweedle trap! Be careful Xev.
Kai, what happened to you? What is this thing? No, don't touch him - he could be dangerous! What do you want me to do, leave him like this? Always choose the robot over the dead man.
OK, Stan said to - cut the cord.
How did I get here? You tell me.
You do not know? No.
Stan told me where you were - actually, he told me to find you and cut the cord.
Where is Stanley? Oh, Xev.
Kai.
Robot.
Stan! Are you - OK? Yes.
I'm fine.
How are you? How'd I get here? I dragged you here from the toilet.
And I stand by it.
Ugh! Somebody tell me what's going on.
So how did you know where Kai was? Sorry? Well, you directed us to him.
I did what? You don't remember? You told me to cut the cord, do you remember that? Cut the what? Let me understand this.
None of us has any memory of what happened, right? The last thing I recall before you revived me was standing on the bridge when we struck the anomaly.
Me too.
Darling - something is not right here I intuit it with every connection I possess.
The screen.
×What about it? It was totally blank.
I tried to take a moth out to check things outside, but the orifice wouldn't open.
Lexx? Where are we? We are one and a half day's journey from the centre of the universe, Stan.
And what happened when we hit that big web thing? I was caught in it for a while, but I was able to work my way out, and I feel better now.
Is that all? I - I feel much better now.
See? There.
Ask the Lexx if he sustained any damage.
- Lexx - did you sustain any damage? - No, Stan.
Perhaps as we approach the centre of the universe, the greater uncertainty principle is starting to take effect.
Oh well, well that's just great! We're not there yet, so it should not be affecting us.
What is absolutely certain is that we are being affected by the Tweedle incompetence principle.
That's enough, 790.
He stood there! All he had to do was turn the Lexx, and he just stood there waiting for someone to find his stupid hat! and that's an order.
I'm sorry.
Forget it.
So, if the greater uncertainty principle isn't what affected us, then - what did? So why do you imagine 790 couldn't trigger his own short term memory circuits? Yet another mystery.
What was that? Do something! I don't know what I was thinking.
I said forget it, Stan.
Eyes.
Playback, Eyes.
That's completely scary.
So, what now? It's all too creepy! I agree.
Look, it's only a day and a half until we reach the centre of the universe, and I don't think that we should leave the bridge unmanned until we get there, I mean, we gotta be prepared to act fast in case anything else weird happens.
Good idea.
Don't listen to him.
He's proven that he's incapable of acting at all.
And whatever's got us has still got him.
.
He can't be trusted! Give me a break, will ya! Lay off, or I'll put you in storage.
Look - I'll take the first shift.
I mean, I owe you that.
You go get yourself some sleep.
Yeah, I'm actually pretty tired.
- Aren't you? - No.
All right then.
Kai? What's on your mind? What's on my mind is what's missing from it.
Yeah, me too, I hear ya pal.
You know, I wouldn't have frozen up if I had my hat, I mean, didn't you ever freeze up when you were alive? No.
Wake up! Wake up, Xev! I thought you were going to stay on the bridge.
I was, until I heard that noise - scared the pants off me! Yeah.
I heard it too, and so did 790, that's why I came down.
Yeah.
I think it came from up there.
I don't know.
I've been working on an idea.
I got it from watching the dead guy with the robot.
Watch.
Lexx - where am I now? On the bridge, Stan.
And what am I doing? Standing there with the woman.
Right.
Where did I come from? A passageway.
Which one? I can't remember.
Well - sometimes he can't remember, but - Lexx, show us, walking onto the bridge just now.
As you command, Stan.
OK Lexx.
Now - show us what happened when you hit that big web.
As you command, Stan.
He can do it, I mean, I know he can! OK, Lexx - one more time.
Well, Lexx may not be very smart but he gets there eventually - don't ya Lexx? I do as you command, Stan.
Thatta boy.
Everybody ready? Cut the ceremony and get on with it Tweedle - and don't think I'm falling for your little parlour game.
I know you're both evil and possessed by something beyond evil! Yeah.
OK Lexx - show us what you got.
I would like to turn away, Stanley.
Not until somebody tells me where my hat is! I must turn Stanley, before it is too late.
Uh oh what? Lexx - turn now! And that's when the Lexx went blank too.
That doesn't tell us much.
What about all the things that happened after? Tweedle's directions to Kai, and the filaments in Kai's face.
This cut the cord business, and those strange noises I heard.
The only notion I accept in all this is that our captain can walk around when he's brain dead.
I'm not satisfied! I think we are lucky to be still alive.
Some of us.
You know, much as I hate to admit it, I think the robot may be right.
It doesn't add up.
So, what do you say we try to take another look outside, yeah? Lexx, open up, can you hear me? Oh, I don't understand this.
Lexx - show us what you see outside! Stanley.
When the Lexx sees something, what happens to it? I mean, the image that appears on its eyes, where does it go? There.
Lexx has many eyes.
If I am able to successfully attach 790 into one of these optic nerves we can perhaps intercept a visual signal from the Lexx.
Must be the right one.
What was that? I don't know - but the Lexx is not happy.
Look into 790's eye screens.
Is that what the Lexx is seeing? Out of this particular eye, yes.
Clearly the Lexx never broke free of the web.
It's controlling him.
How? Maybe it's alive or something? It's smart.
I'd say it almost got us, but it was interrupted by something.
So, why isn't it controlling us? Clearly it is - Tweedle at least.
Kill him immediately, Kai.
Maybe, when whatever it is got into Kai, it got screwed up or something? Because Kai turned out to be dead? And it had an adverse reaction to my non-living state, so it couldn't properly function again until the cord connecting it with me was severed.
And it must have controlled you Stan, at least for a while.
That's why you knew where Kai was.
Yeah, probably.
I mean, I wasn't in control of myself.
This thing seems to need a direct connection to the web.
It must have a line right into Lexx's brain.
Just like it tried to get with you Kai - and with you.
Lexx's brain is nestled above the bridge.
That is where we will locate whatever is controlling him.
This is no ordinary beast, that's for sure.
I mean, faking images, and using Lexx's voice, and that projection - I thought I was getting some answers, I was just being manipulated! We're all being manipulated.
We still are - by Tweedle.
Oh, give us a break 790, OK? Oh, it's clever.
It's very very clever.
It must be somewhere up there.
We'll never see it in that mess.
I can see it.
It's there! Cut the cord, Kai! Are you OK? Yeah.
Stan, try again.
Tell the Lexx to fire! Lexx? Yes, Stanley? Fire, Lexx! Break out of the web, now! So, if anything can happen at the centre of the universe, maybe there's even a chance that you could come back to life there.
Perhaps that would be possible - or perhaps impossible.
It is unknowable.
I suspect you are more likely to find death, than I am to find life.
Why? Life is a harder state to achieve than death.
Let's just say that we get there.
I survive and you become alive.
Would you - welcome it? I do not know.
I would have to be alive to think that way, and I am not alive.
OK - but if you did become alive again, and if you were thinking and feeling like a living person again, would you then - welcome it? I do not know.
Did anyone ever tell you that you are the most frustrating man alive - I mean, not alive? No.
You are.
And if the universe is really coming to the end, then maybe I should just - let Stanley have me.
Stanley would welcome the opportunity.
You could have seen it! I had no interest in seeing it, woman who commands all of my attention.
Tweedle deserved no assistance from me! How long now until we reach the centre of the universe? love pumpkin.
I'm kind of tired myself.
I think - I'll lie down for a while.
I will be your pillow.
No you won't.
You will keep watch for me.
Xev darling, please! My robot intuition is acting up again, and I don't like what it's telling me! Hi! Oh! Xev, what are you doing here? Oh, you know - What's wrong? I'm just afraid of what might happen when we get to the centre of the universe.
So am I.
Maybe there's another option for us? I wish there was.
I can't see it.
It's scary.
We'll find a way out of this, won't we? Right? Yes.
Yes we will.
If anyone can do it, it's us.
Is there something else you wanted to talk about? Well, it's only one day now until we reach the centre That, that it is.
And I thought you might like me to - To what? Give it to you.
After all, it means so much to you, and I wouldn't want you to go without it, seeing how there's only so little time.
So little time.
So little time.
What's the matter? What are you doing? Don't! Too late.
You said you were going to give it to me! I did, but I meant - ÒWell, give it to me, you will, I'm gonna consume you Xev! - No, Stan! - No, not "No, Stan".
It will happen.
What will happen? You will give it to me! No, Stan! I too must run from Mantrid.
You will be my new host, and take me to the centre of the universe.
I told you he was evil! I have your captain.
If you harm me, I'll kill him! What are you waiting for, Kai? Rip his head off, kill them both! I'm in his brain.
I'll kill him! What do you want? I want to live.
You're a disgusting parasite! That's what I've been saying since the day we met.
I want to live, no more.
Not like you.
You almost killed me when I touched your brain.
Kill it Kai.
It is inside Stanley, so I will have to kill him first.
You won't kill your captain, so you won't kill me.
How can you be so sure? Because you're human! I will do as you request.
If you kill me, you won't be able to control the Lexx .
The Lexx will go to the centre as instructed! You're right, whatever you are.
The human in me wouldn't kill Stan - but I'm half Cluster lizard, and Stan is already dead, so kill it Kai! Where did it go? Good one, oh she of the gorgeous gams! Stan? Oh, ow, oo Uh - where's my hat? My hat? That's my hat! It's my hat, my hat, oh boy, oh yeah, it's my hat, oh! You don't wanna know where it was? No, no, no, no, no.
I don't care, I don't care, I don't care.
It's on my head and everything is just fine.
Not for long.
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