Preacher (2016) s02e13 Episode Script

The End of the Road

1 [BIRDS CHIRPING, CROWS CAWING] [TAB POPS] [EXHALES SHARPLY] [SIGHS] [CHICKEN CLUCKING] Hey, get off.
Get o Hey! Hey! I said scoot, didn't I? Go! - Shoo! - [CHICKEN BAWKS] [VEHICLE APPROACHES] [BIRDS CAWING] Oh, my goodness, you're adorable.
- Is this the right place? - Probably.
My cat ran off Dusty? He hasn't been back in five nights, which is not like him, you know? Not like him at all.
Uncharacteristic.
Very uncharacteristic.
[WHISPERS] And I was told about a lady here might be able to help track him down for me? Madame L'Angelle is a world-renowned spiritist, diviner, mistress of the pyramids.
She sees through walls, 'round corners, into human hearts.
She'll find your cat.
[EXHALES SHARPLY] I hope so.
He's not an outdoor cat, you know? So I'm worried that he might be Parking is $8.
Sorry.
Right.
You can park out by the Slave Quarters.
Occult Room's in the Big House.
Gator tours on the hour.
Gift shop closes at 5:00.
Welcome to Angelville.
["IF YOU'VE GOT THE MONEY I'VE GOT THE TIME" PLAYS] If you got the money, I've got the time - [CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS] - We'll go honky tonkin', and we'll have a time - [HORN HONKS] - We'll make all the night spots Dance, drink beer and wine If you've got the money, honey, I've got the time [CHICKEN BAWKS] There ain't no use Welcome to Angelville, where the magic of the South comes to life.
Spare me the carny talk.
I'm here for the tombs.
T tombs I I don't know what that is.
Come on, little man.
I got money.
I want to see some blood.
I honestly don't know what Maybe you should ask over at the Boyd place across the way? They're into all sortsa shady stuff Officer.
L'Angelle scum! [ENGINE REVS] If you've got the money, honey, I've got the time [VEHICLE APPROACHES] [CLEARS THROAT] [BRAKES SQUEAL] Hey, T.
C.
[SIGHS] Hey, Jody.
What took you guys so long? I was halfway ready to eat that stupid chicken.
[ENGINE IDLING] Anyway, thanks.
Afternoon will probably pick up.
What? What? That's it.
I swear.
[EXHALES SHARPLY] [GRUNTS] [BONES CRACKING] [GRUNTS] [GROANS] [GRAVEL CRUNCHES] [GASPING] [VEHICLE DEPARTS] [CHICKEN CLUCKS] - Son of a - [CHICKEN BAWKS] [GRUNTS] [CLEARS THROAT] [BIRDS CHIRPING] [FOOTSTEPS ECHOING] [PANTING] [KNOCK ON DOOR] [DOOR CREAKS] Sorry to bother you, but, uh [VOICE BREAKING] I don't know if you can, but please? Everything has a price.
You understand? [BELL TOLLING IN DISTANCE] [LIGHT THUD] Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, no.
I am sorry.
[TOLLING CONTINUES] [DOOR OPENS] [CELLPHONE BEEPS] [DOOR CLOSES] They are assembling now, Messiah.
Don't call me that.
I still don't understand We have to start somewhere build you up, introduce you to the world.
And this? Your speech has been focus-grouped multiple times.
I wrote the last draft myself.
I can tell.
I know messiahs, how they begin, how they rise.
I know what makes them work.
And this is how they start.
A cape? An 11th-century Flemish fencing cloak with gold appliqué.
You see? Gives a sense of authority.
I don't give a shit.
I'm not wearing that.
- [SIGHS] - Shall I save seats for your friends? They're not comin'.
Oh.
Well, it's a packed house in there already.
[DOOR OPENS] [FART SOUNDS] - [LAUGHTER] - CHILD: Awesome! Quiet! [LAUGHTER STOPS] Give me that.
[FART SOUND] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER FADES, STOPS] We have a special guest today someone who is apparently quite holy.
And if you're good, he will perform or so I'm told a miracle for us.
Is it God? No! [MURMURING] Uh But close.
Preacher? [BEEP] [CLEARS THROAT] Hey.
"Look around.
The world has fallen into confusion and decay.
Murder, rape sedition, incest, lesbianism" [PAPER RUSTLES] "But I have a power" [CLEARS THROAT] "a power to make things better.
Let me ask you a question If you had a power that could make anyone do whatever you said, what would you do with it?" [CHILDREN SHOUTING] Get my fart machine back! MOTHER SUPERIOR: Quiet! You're never getting that disgusting thing back.
Ever! [CHILDREN GROAN] Hey, kids, you want to see a miracle? CHILDREN: Me! I do! [GUNFIRE, SCREAMING IN DISTANCE] [PANTING] It's the Armenians! The Armenians are coming! [GUNFIRE, SCREAMING CONTINUE] Everyone! Get behind the table now! Get down! Come on! [INDISTINCT SHOUTING] Come on! Get down! Hide! Come on! [RIFLES COCKING] [SCREAMING CONTINUES] Move aside, Priest.
We just want the nuns and the children.
[SCOFFS] Idiots.
Do you know who this man is? [GROANS] [CRACKLED ECHOING] Put your weapons down.
[SHOUTING STOPS] What did you say? [GUN COCKS] Say that again.
[NORMAL VOICE] I said [GRUNTING, SCREAMING] put your weapons down.
[GRUNTING, SCREAMING] ["MY SWEET LORD" PLAYS] [DISTORTED SCREAM] [GRUNTING] My sweet Lord Mm, my Lord I really wanna see you Really wanna see you Really wanna see you, Lord Really wanna see you, Lord But it takes so long, my Lord Hallelujah My sweet Lord Hallelujah Mm, my Lord Hallelujah My, my Lord Hallelujah I really wanna know you Hallelujah Really wanna go with you Hallelujah Really wanna show you, Lord [BELL TOLLS IN DISTANCE] won't take long, my Lord Hallelujah Mm [CHILDREN CLAPPING, CHANTING "PREACHER!"] [CASE CLOSES, LATCHES CLICK] [CHANTING CONTINUES] Okay.
I'm gonna see y'all later.
You take care of yourselves, now.
CHILDREN: Bye! [CELLPHONE CLACKING] You get it all? Every screaming child and heathen cry already posted and trending.
Huh.
Got a call from Jimmy Kimmel's people.
We're off to Los Angeles.
It sorta worked out, then? Yes, minus the anxious pupil who defecated on my shoe.
Why were they shooting blanks? Who? The Armenians.
They had no live rounds in their guns.
Such an alien culture.
Who knows what they're thinking? [GRUNTS] It was a stunt.
You set me up.
There is no time for conventional methods.
The Christ child, unibrowed cretinism notwithstanding, is miles ahead of you in name recognition.
We have to spread the word.
And this as I said, is how we start.
Now, come on.
The jet is waiting.
I didn't sign up for this shit! Spoken like a true messiah.
[WHIRRING] [WHIRRING STOPS] [DOOR CLOSES] [GRUNTS] Jimmy Kimmel, right? Yep.
Exciting.
Starr's a genius.
And now we're his right-hand men ready to serve him no matter the cost or cause, ready to face down any disbeliever who dares oppose him and drench the streets in their blood.
Yeah.
No, I'm excited.
I'm gonna unplug the air mattress, maybe take a shower.
[DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE] [WHIMPERS] [MATTRESS SQUEAKS] [EXHALES SHARPLY] [SIGHS] - [FOOTSTEPS APPROACH] - [MOUSE CLICKS] [CLICK] [WOMAN MOANING] MAN: Playing by day, feeding by night.
- We are the Children of Blood.
- [MOANING] Join us and let your darkest desires drink deep.
[SCREAMING, MOANING] [LAUGHTER, FLUTTERING] [SCREAMING, CLATTER] [ECHOING SCREAMS] [SCREAMING INTENSIFIES] [SCREAMING STOPS] [HUMMING] [SCREAMING, LAUGHTER] [SCREAMING CONTINUES] [SCREAMING STOPS] [CLOTHING RUSTLES] ["COME MY LOVE" PLAYS] I stand here before you Afraid that I have lost you To someone, but Hey.
Hello.
I can't believe [CHUCKLES] That you were All this for you? Hmm? The sunscreen.
Some of it.
Some of it's for a friend.
[CHUCKLES] I was gonna say.
SPF 100? Gonna say what? Uh no offense, ma'am.
[REGISTER BEEPS] Well, that's for me to decide, isn't it? [EXHALES SHARPLY] [REGISTER BEEPS] [PLASTIC BAG RUSTLES] Then say goodbye I.
D for the booze.
- [SCOFFS] - I don't ask, I don't stay in business.
And want a love that cannot be But, darling, if you love me Then give your love to me All right.
[REGISTER BEEPS] Anything else, darlin'? [SUCKS TEETH] Yeah.
I would like some cherry lip balm.
[LIGHT THUD] And this.
Aah! Here.
[DOOR OPENS, BELL JINGLES] Oh, yeah, 'cause I'm the bad guy! [DOOR CLOSES, BELL JINGLES] [SCOFFS] [TIRES SCREECH] Bitch.
[LIGHTER CLICKS] [INHALES DEEPLY] [EXHALES] [KNOCK ON DOOR] TULIP: Ready to go? [STIFLED] Yep.
[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE] Is that crack? No.
It's just [NORMAL VOICE] It isn't.
Seriously? Look, how I spend my downtime is my business, all right? If you don't like it, you can clear off.
In fact, you probably should if ya knew what was good for ya.
Oh, Cass, cut the crap.
Look.
Bimini is gonna be great, okay? At least, I think so.
On the road again? No more dumbass God hunt? [CHUCKLES] Just the two of us, partying and having fun.
And Denis.
Don't forget.
Yeah, Denis, too.
[SIGHS] Anyway, Jesse's gone.
He made his choice, and we made ours.
Too bad.
But I am not gonna mope around smoking crack about it.
All right, but it's just it's - [PIPE CLACKS] - medicinal.
[EXHALES SHARPLY] So, look.
Whatever happens next between the two of us, okay? I say let it happen.
[CHUCKLING] What? You know we're gonna have sex again, right? ["PRAY FOR LIL" PLAYS] We are? Well, it's what you want, isn't it? Wha Yeah, I mean Uh Okay.
So If there's a lord, make her a woman May she look after all Is that all? who need her inside May she forgive all of those cowards Who make every day a losing fight [BELT BUCKLE CLANKS] You don't need a prayer [FLESH CRUNCHES] [SCREAMING] [DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS] [KNOCK ON DOOR] You ready to go? Yeah.
Is that crack? Yeah.
All right.
I'ma go pack.
All right.
[METAL SQUEAKING] [CLANK] [SQUEAKING] [ANIMALS HOWLING DISTANTLY] [SQUEAKING] That is the frontier.
[PANTING] He's the one who lets you out.
Tell him your name and that you do not belong here.
He will blow his horn and see that you cross safely to the other side.
They will give you clothes, put you on a bus, and drop you at the nearest stop, and then you are free.
No, Eugene.
It's impossible.
Except for someone like you.
Well, goodbye.
Well, of course.
It is the end of the road.
[SIGHS] I suppose, but all they can do is make it worse.
[WATER LAPS AGAINST SHORE] [UNEARTHLY BELLOW SOUNDS] [INHALES] [WATER LAPS AGAINST SHORE] Looks like they were pretty rough on ya down there.
Oh, shit.
[WATER LAPS AGAINST SHORE] Which? [LAUGHS] Uh, no.
No, that's just the, uh I don't know what that is.
Here you go.
MANNERING: [ECHOING] Stop! [NORMAL VOICE] Give him to me, Sharon.
He doesn't belong here.
I don't care.
[ECHOING] I want him back.
Superintendent, this is my jurisdiction.
- If I say - He broke my extrapolator! [ECHOING] If I say he's free to go, he's free.
Those are the rules.
[NORMAL VOICE] I don't know if you heard, but God's gone [ARROW FIRES] Aah! [ECHOING] And the rules have changed.
[WALKIE-TALKIE CRACKLES] [NORMAL VOICE] Got him.
All units descend on Sector 4.
[ALARM BLARING IN DISTANCE] For eons we've ruled here, and no one has ever escaped.
[ECHOING] Ever.
Did you honestly think that I was going [BLARING CONTINUES] [BARKING, SHOUTING IN DISTANCE] Hurry! You have to go! Hurry! You have saved me.
Don't you see? I finally did something good.
[CHUCKLES] [BARKING, SHOUTING CONTINUE] Go, go, go! [BARKING, SHOUTING CONTINUE] But I couldn't.
The things I have done It's very nice of you, but I belong here.
[BARKING, SHOUTING CONTINUE] - [CELLPHONE BEEPS] - [SIGHS] Kimmel's people.
They wanted to put you on after Kylie Jenner.
Why didn't you use your power back there? I didn't need to.
You will.
[CELLPHONE BEEPS] [PLASTIC BAG RUSTLES] [PLASTIC CRINKLES] [RUSTLING] [ZIPPER CLOSES] [EXHALES SHARPLY] TULIP: Are you ready? I guess so.
Um, can you tell your dad I'm packing up the car? Cass! I'm packing up the car! CASSIDY: Okay! [FOOTSTEPS] Where ? [CLATTERS] [SIGHS] MAN ON VIDEO: Join us and let your darkest desires You can't wear that on the plane.
[SCREAMING] Get dressed.
Tulip? TULIP: Yep.
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACH] What? They were watching us this whole time.
Who? The men in white.
Starr.
[BAG THUDS] [SIGHS] Jesus.
[WHISPERING] God, I might have masturbated in here.
[SIGHING] Yeah, me, too.
[NORMAL VOICE] [SIGHS] Do you think we should tell Jesse? That we masturbated in the living room? No.
Not about that.
About 'em spyin' on us, gatherin' intelligence and the like.
That bulbous one-eyed git has been undermining us this whole time.
I say we tell Jesse about it.
What difference would it make, Cassidy? It worked.
I'll see ya it the car.
[FOOTSTEPS DEPART] All right, boy.
Come on.
Let's go for a ride.
Aah.
[DRAWER CLOSES] [GROWLS SOFTLY] [WHINES] [SIGHS] [ELECTRONIC CHIME] Can you be a good lad? [ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS INRENCH] Promise me [ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] promise me you'll be good.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] All right.
Yeah, all right, don't look at me like that.
They were in the laundry, and I was just [ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Denis, put 'em down.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Did you hear me? [ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Denis, put 'em down.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Just put 'em down.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Put 'em down.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Please.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Can you be a good lad, Papa? Can you be good? [SIGHS] No.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] I don't think I can.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Not with you around.
[ROBOTIC VOICE REPEATS IN FRENCH] Ah! Ahh! Papa! Papa-a-a-a! Papa! [WINDOW SHATTERS] Papa! Papa! [BREATHES HEAVILY] Papa! I know, son.
I know.
Papa! [MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS] Hmm? Oh, ja.
It's a little big, but Danke.
[MUSIC STOPS] [BRAKES SQUEAK] [ENGINE IDLES] [ENGINE REVVING] [TIRES SCREECH, HORN HONKS] [TIRES SCREECH] You okay? Somebody help! Here, here! Get out of my way! [GROANING] What's wrong with you?! Aah! Aah.
Ew! [VEHICLES PASSING] There is a young cowboy Lives on the range His horse and his cattle Are his only companions He works in the saddle Sleeps in the canyons Just waitin' for summer For his pastures to change [BIRDS CHIRPING] And as the moon rises, he sits by his fire [THUD, DOG WHINES] [THUD] [FOOTSTEPS] [HORN HONKS IN DISTANCE] [CAR DOOR OPENS] [TULIP HUMMING] [EXHALES] [CAR DOOR SLAMS] All right.
Where's Denis? Oh, he, uh he changed his mind.
[SIGHS] Hey, you can sit in the front if you want.
[SCOFFS] Oh, yeah.
[CAR DOOR OPENS] [CAR DOOR CLOSES] [CAR DOOR OPENS] [RATTLING] [CAR DOOR SQUEAKS, CLOSES] [KEYS JINGLE] Huh.
Yeah.
This is a definite upgrade.
It's got nice sightlines, and handy ashtray.
It's very nice.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER IN DISTANCE] Will you give me a sec? I I forgot to say goodbye.
- Yeah, sure.
- [CAR DOOR OPENS] [CAR DOOR CLOSES] [FOOTSTEPS DEPART] [ENGINE ROARS IN DISTANCE] [CAR DOOR OPENS] - [BARKING] - [CAR DOOR CLOSES] [KNOCK ON DOOR] [DOOR CREAKS OPEN] Jenny? FEATHERSTONE: Tulip? Is that you? Ah, just gimme a sec.
Sure.
You moving out? Yeah found a new place.
Yeah.
I'm movin', too.
This was always gonna be temporary.
Yeah.
Um, I just wanted to say, uh, thank you, you know for everything.
Mm.
I I should thank you.
You helped me get through a bad stretch there showed me how to be strong.
[DOOR OPENS] You're out of moisturizer bitch.
[SHUFFLING FOOTSTEPS] [DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES] Of course, I still have a ways to go.
Hmm.
I never did tell you about Dallas, did I? No.
You never did.
[GUNSHOT] [BIRDS CHIRPING] [INDISTINCT CHATTER] [REPORTERS SHOUTING QUESTIONS] Preacher, tell us about your special powers.
Is it true you read a nun's mind?! What's up with those shiny collar things, Preacher? All right, that's enough.
Tune in for more tonight on "Kimmel.
" [REPORTERS SHOUTING QUESTIONS] [PLANE ENGINE IDLES] [GROANS] [JET ENGINES WHINING] You're a natural.
And when the world realizes that their only other option needs reminding he can't eat his own hemorrhoids, I think we'll be in good shape.
[CELLPHONE VIBRATES] Preacher, we're on our way to redemption.
This is your calling not that.
I just want to see they're okay.
[CELLPHONE BEEPS] [TIRES SQUEAL] I understand go to your friends, get him there as fast as you can - Go! - and when you're ready, come back for your soul.
- Wha - [TIRES SCREECH] [CELLPHONE RINGS] [CELLPHONE BEEPS] Idiots.
Shut up.
I'll deal with you later.
[CLICKS TONGUE] In the meantime cancel the ambulance.
[TIRES SCREECH] S she she went upstairs to say goodbye.
She just went up to say goodbye, man, and that was it.
That's all right.
Let me look at that.
Okay.
All right.
Pass me those towels.
All right, got got to keep the pressure on there.
See if there's any super glue, would ya? - Super glue? - Yeah, close up the wound.
Try under the sink.
Okay.
Okay.
Ah.
[RATTLING] I leave you for one day, look what happens.
[THUMPING, CLANKING IN DISTANCE] [GRUNTS] It's gone right through.
That's that's good.
What about window caulk? There's no glue.
What? I don't know what to do! I I rang the ambulance, like, forever ago, man! All right! All right, all right! Let's rig up an IV drip.
You got y you got syringes? - Yeah, yeah.
- All right, clean ones? - Yeah.
- And there's blood in the freezer, right? - Uh, y maybe some.
- All right, hurry up.
- She's AB negative.
- All right.
[GRUNTS] What happened? She she just went upstairs to say goodbye, and - Goodbye to who? - I don't know! I found her in the hallway! 'Course, where's the bloody ambulance? Shit! I don't think I have any AB.
All right.
It's all right, Cass.
Let's drive her to the hospital.
Give me a hand here.
Come on.
- Come on.
Come on.
That's it.
- [WHEEZES] Come on.
Come on, love.
- [TULIP GASPS, SPUTTERS] - What No, don't do that.
It's all right.
Shh.
Shh, shh, shh.
No, no, no.
Yeah.
Come on.
Come on.
- Come on, baby.
- Jesse.
Jesse.
Jesse, use The Word.
Jesse, you're gonna have to use The Word on her, mate.
Just do it.
Come on! Do it! [CRACKLED ECHOING] Breathe.
Breathe.
What's happening?! Why isn't it w - [NORMAL VOICE] It doesn't work anymore! - Why not? I don't know! I just doesn't! Come on! All right.
I can do it.
I can do it.
- Come on! No! - I can do it.
I can help her.
There's no other way.
[HISSES] Don't touch her.
Don't you ever touch her.
[BOTH GRUNTING] [GROANS] [BOTH GRUNTING] [TULIP PANTING] [SPUTTERING, WHEEZING] [GROANS] Listen listen listen listen listen to me! - Listen to me! - You've got to let me do it.
Look at me.
Look at me! You got to let me do it! It's the only way, all right? Look at me, Jesse! Look, it's the only way.
[GRUNTING] Wait! No, Cass, stop! Stop! No, no! No! [SHOUTS] Listen! It will do it! It won't be It won't be like Denis! - Cass, it's okay.
- It won't be like Denis! She's different! It'll be different, I swear it! - Cass, stop.
- Jesse! [GASPS] What are you doing?! She's gonna die, man.
Tulip's gonna die.
Then let her die.
What? [YELLING] Let her die.
Let her die, Cass.
- [YELLING CONTINUES] - Shh! Cass.
Shh.
- [MOANS] - Shh.
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's all right.
Let her die.
Just let her die.
[BREATHES HEAVILY] ["ON MY ONE" PLAYS] I'm just a poor boy from Nottingham I had my dreams But in this world they're gone They're gone Oh, I'm so lonesome on my one 3 years on the road, 400 shows There's something I want to say Where do I call home? something' I've been meaning to tell you for a long time.
Oh, I'm so lonesome on my one I hate you.
Every time has a stranger - [SCOFFS] - When I'm around No sins forgiven You hate me now? Hell spit me out Where's God? Where's God? Just you wait.
He's even left me on my one Just you wait.
Where's God? Where's God? He's even left me on my one I'm just a poor boy from Nottingham [CHICKEN CLUCKS] I had my dreams But in this world they're gone They're gone I'm oh-so lonesome on my one [SONG FADES] [SLOW JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS, INDISTINCT TALKING] [WOMAN MOANING DISTANTLY] [URINATING] [URINATING STOPS] [TOILET FLUSHES]