Regular Show (2010) s04e36 Episode Script

Last Meal

MITCH! Hey, babe, you ready for our date? I sure am.
You look lovely tonight, Starla.
And you look Why are you wearing two different shoes? Geez, babe, I guess it's been a while since I've seen my feet.
I've been taking a lot of power lunches lately.
Mitch, you know you'll always be my power lunch, but I think maybe it's time we start eating a little healthier.
I guess I could try eating the salad instead of just throwing it in the trash.
I know, let's go on a diet! I'll do it with you, it'll be fun! But alright, babe.
You always want what's best for me.
I'll do whatever it takes to make my fun bun happy.
PERFECT! Our diet starts tonight.
You mean after we go to Cheezers? No, right now! I know a new restuarant we can try.
Salad corall.
Yeah, run into the woods, that's safer.
Oh no, it's the curse of the dude in the cheap rubber suit.
Dudes, I need your help! What's up, Muscle Man? It's terrible! Starla's starting me on a diet tonight! Sounds like she did you a favor.
If it gets any bigger, we're gonna have to add it to the park payroll.
This isn't funny! Sometimes you gotta make sacrifice for the one you love.
I want to get healthy.
But I got to do something first.
And I need you guys to help me.
Tomorrow while Starla's out with her mom, I want to eat all my favorite food one last time.
I can't give them up without saying goodbye.
They've made me who I am.
So will you help me, bros? One final scarf down before the buffet closes? - Sure, dude! - We'll help! - No problem! See you tomorrow, grandmas! - You want anymore chips? - No, I'm good.
Alright, bros, It took me all night, but I finally figured it out.
here on this map you can see all the best food joints in the city.
Cheezers, Wing Kingdom, Death Kwon Do, and finally Hot buns.
Hot buns.
THAT'S THE BEST DOGGERY IN TOWN! YOU KNOW IT, BRO! Now here's where you guys come in.
Fives will drive us cause he's skilled with his hand.
You dudes are gonna come along with me for moral support And talk to Starla while she calls me.
I'm not gonna lie to her about cheating on this diet, - but I don't care if you do.
- WHAT!?! - How's that any different than - It's ringing, bro! Hello? Oh, hey, Mordecai.
Can I talk to Muscle Man? Muscle Man can't talk right now, he's outside doing leg lifts? Can you tell him I can't wait to get a hold of his ripped glutes? Yeah, uh-huh, maybe, bye.
Alright, bros.
LET'S DO THIS! Well bros, here we are.
The final stop.
One more Hot Buns hot dog and I'll be ready to start that diet.
It's even more crowded than usual.
Hey, Muscle Man.
Yo, Marty! How is it going bro?! One of your delicious hot dogs, please? - No can do, bro.
- What? We need all our hot dogs for the hot dog eating contest.
Come on man, one hot dog? For me? My hands are tight man.
The only way to get one of our dogs today is to join the contest.
Well then sign me up, bro! Here you go! My last delicious meal.
More like "your delicious last meal.
" Death!?! What are you doing here?! Oy! You guys really are fools.
Don't you remember? So don't expect it to be so easy to get one of your souls back next time! Which will be soon, what with Muscle Man entering that hot dog eating contest.
Seriously, you're gonna die in a hot dog eating contest.
But I just wanted one more hot dog before getting healthy for Starla.
I'm not a real entrant in the contest! Oh yeah? Your reading skills are rubbish! I never should've done this! It's a plain piece of paper, dude.
Just don't participate.
He has to participate! If he doesn't, then I'll just take his soul right now! No way! You don't just get to take people's souls if they haven't done anything! You're just jealous of Muscle Man livin' his life! Muscle Man's lived more life in one day than you have in a thousand years! What!?! I do too live life! I live all kinds of life! Yeah right! Listen to this guy.
"I've got so much life.
" He's probably never even had the guts to enter a hot dog eating contest.
Not true! I'm all about competitive eating! I haven't lost a hot dog eating contest since Muscle Man's' hairstyle was a legitmate fashion statement! Was that before or after your skin started looking like grated Paramasen? - Paramasen skin! - Give me that! If I win this contest, Muscle Mans' soul is mine! Fine, but if Muscle Man wins, he doesn't die! Which isn't very likely, seeing as Muscle Mans' stomach's is almost full.
Catch you gents on the flip side.
Flip side of the ground that is.
My stomach fears no reaper, bro! YOU'RE GOING DOWN! Welcome to the annual Hot Buns hot dog eating contest! Whoever eats the most dogs within 10 minutes wins! And remember, if you can't hold down what you put in your mouth you are disqualified! Hope you're hungry.
Ready? CHOW DOWN! Hello.
Hey, Mordecai.
How's my wing king doing? Uh, good.
Tell him I'm making us a healthy dinner.
Is that Starla? Let me talk to her! But you told me to cover for you! This is it, I'm not gonna go out on a lie.
NOW GIVE ME THE PHONE! Babe, listen up, I've got something important to tell you, and you're not gonna like it.
Okay? I know I'm supposed to be on a diet, but I'm in a hot dog eating contest against Death - nd I'm about to lose.
- WHAT!?! I've only got a few minutes left and I just wanted you to know, I love you! Stay right there, Mitch, and don't give up! Stop the car, Mom! my man needs me! - MITCH! - Starla! MITCH! You can't die! I'm sorry, babe! I'm sorry I lied to you and hurt you like this.
Even if I had to eat wheat germ for the rest of my life, I'd do it if it meant one more day with you.
Well, I guess in that case the rest of my life would only be one day, but you know what I'm saying.
OF COURSE I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! I ALWAYS KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! That's why I love you with all my heart.
Really, you love me that much? Wholy and truly.
And because of that, I won't let you go without one more taste of your most favorite food.
That's disgusting! Are people allowed to do that to each other? I don't feel so DISQUALIFIED! WELL, WHO WOULDN'T GET SICK!?! AREN'T YOU SEEING THIS!?! Yeah, Muscle Man! Muscle Man! Muscle Man! Muscle Man! Muscle Man! Here's your complimentary T-shirt, you loser! You better enjoy the next few days, cause your deadline just got moved up, BIG TIME! Thanks for coming, Starla! None of I'll eat that wheat germ if it makes you happy.
Didn't I tell you? I got us Wing Kingdom brand wheat germ.
It's southeast Asian Buffalo Ranch.
You know me so well.
You think we should tell Muscle Man there's a hot dog sticking out of his pocket? Nah, he'll figure it out for himself.

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