Regular Show (2010) s05e15 Episode Script

The Heart of a Stuntman

Yeah,set up the chairs and wipe off the tables.
Plug in the mic but don't trip on the cable.
Blow up the balloons and blow out the candles.
That's some theme parties you don't wanna wear sandals.
Check your invitation, Park is the location.
When the clock strikes 10 it's time for celebration.
Timmy's birthday party yo.
It's a big one oh.
Timmy Timmy Ti-Timmy Timmy Timmy Ti-Timmy Timmy Timmy! Man, Timmy's so awesome.
I couldn't believe he's already turning 10.
Seriously, we watched that kid grow up, bro.
Happy Birthday Timmy.
Guys guys, check it out! I'm gonna walk the plank like a real pirate.
And the winner, of the astronaut ice cream eating contest is .
Timmy!! You guys always make my birthday the best.
Man, Timmy's party just keep getting better every year.
Yeah, we gotta make sure this stunt man party is the best one yet.
What do you mean "a real stunt man job"? But it's a stunt man theme party, what are we supposed to tell my client? Well you can say goodbye to your complementary fountain sodas.
And you'll never stunt in this park again, Mr.
Hazard.
Is everything okay, Benson? No,everything is not okay.
The stunt man canceled and Timmy's party is ruined.
Are you serious? But Timmy is counting on us I know, but where am I supposed to find a stunt man this late in the game? Well, I might know a guy who actually no.
I don't know any stunt man.
Urr you losing it, Mitch.
That's it, we have to cancel Timmy's party.
No wait! Yeah! Maybe one of us can do the stunt.
No, it has to be a license stunt man.
Our insurance doesn't cover amateurs.
Well,how hard it is to get a license? Hard, the success rate at stunt man college is only 25%.
And you guys aren't exactly stunt man material.
But if it's 25% ,then at least one of us should be able to do it right? You think you're gonna beat the odds like that in one day? If that's what it would take to make Timmy happy,then we'll do it.
Yeah, it's the only chance we have.
We'll done with all the party pret.
All in rolls right now.
Okay.
But one of you'd better come back with a stunt man license.
Or else Timmy's birthday and probably his life are gonna be ruined.
Are you sure this is the right place? It's the address that was on the brochure.
This is definitely the right place.
Johnny Crasher is a living legend.
Before he retired, he went in and out over 40 comas.
No other stunt man is survived anywhere near that many.
Johnny Crasher! Wow! Did you see that roll? Not part of the stunt.
Uhh, are you okay? Yes, are you trying to say I look bad after been in 40 comas? Are you talking to me ? Because .
Yeah, I am talking to you.
You think the stunt man is suppose to be pretty? You think .
This headache.
Okay, well unless you're just here to drop off your recycling, let's get started.
Here are your stunt textbooks.
They contain everything you need to know to complete this course.
You should read this in case I forget to teach you something important.
Which is very likely because I've been in 40 comas.
You may think you have what it takes to be a stunt man.
But I am here to tell ya, Never that matters if you can't do one thing.
A stunt man gotta hit his marks.
If you can't do that, you are worthless! Now, before I give away any another freebies there is little matter of tuition.
Cash your money orders only.
That will just about to make up for the way things turn out.
So just a few warnings ,while you're still in the comfort of your chairs.
You're gonna be breaking bones out there, you're gonna be get your teeth knocked out.
Your face's smashed,your eye-balls' ripped out.
Anybody wanna quit yet? No? Alright, good.
He is just being dramatic, right? Hey, little guy.
I am sorry.
Do you wanna teach the class? Maybe you should get up here on the mark and show everybody how to take a punch.
Huh? But Now! Good luck,dude.
Yeah wo-hoo! Teach us, teacher.
You think there is something funny about stunts? No, sir.
I am sorry sir, that looks very serious , sir.
It was,but I don't think you realize how serious it is.
So why don't you get up here and take the next punch? Back your crib, you little baby.
So, are there any secrets? I am confused.
Aren't we suppose to learn how to take a fake punch? Oh, you are confused.
Ah, okay.
Why don't you get on this mark so that I can punch you in the face.
Well, well, well, you passed basic training.
Congratulations! By the way, I'm being sarcastic.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was your tone, and the eye rolling thing.
You've gone from being delicate butterflies to slightly less delicate butterflies.
It don't mean nothing! If you want your stuntman licenses, You have to pass my final exam! Final exam? This ain't no nanby-panby true or false test.
It's five and half acres of your pure pain! And if your survived that, you just hit your mark and you'll get your license.
Where are you guys? Er We are about to take the stuntman exam.
Oh, hurry, we need a Uncle Benson! Timmy's here, er I'll stall.
Timmy! Bros, come on, bring it in! The odds say at least one of us can make it.
One! Two! Three! Who's this for? Timmy! You are ready? Sir, yes sir! Starting position! Get set! Go! Good luck cadets! Bros go on without me, I can't take it.
What? No! Just now going through those wooden panels, It felt like we went through three times or something.
What about Timmy?! Timmy's a great kid, be great for him.
We've got to go! Timmy! Timmy! Don't try this at home! Come on! bros! Mordecai! Dudes, I can't hold on.
But you've got've.
Tell Timmy, I'm sorry.
No!!! Go without me dude.
What? We already lost two men! But the pain How about Timmy's emotional pain when his big one-oh hope blows.
Your pain means nothing! Timmy means everything! You're right! Well at least we don't have to jump over sharks.
What was that? The final jump! Got it bro! Ew, this part always gets up.
Dude, we are gonna miss our mark! Jump at my back bro.
Dude! How do you know to wear a wingsuit? It was in the textbook bro.
Well I'll be! He have read the text book.
Alright! let me down easy.
The doctor says this I would never produce tears again.
But the way you hit those marks out there is nothing short of a miracle.
Con-n-gra-a-tu-u-lations! And er this time I'm being sincere.
Everything ready guys? Yeah.
Okay kids, it's the moment you've all been waiting for.
It's time for my birthday stunt! Hit it! Yeah! Make some noioioise! Happy Birthday Timmy! I'm sorry Timmy.
Alright! It was the best stunt I've ever seen! Now! Let's open some presents! Ah I love that little guy.

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