Riverdale (2017) s01e04 Episode Script

Chapter Four: The Last Picture Show

ARCHIE: Previously on Riverdale JUGHEAD: The story is about a town, once wholesome and innocent, now forever changed by the mysterious murder of Jason Blossom on the 4th of July.
- Can we talk, Ms.
Grundy? - About what? You're the music teacher.
Can we talk about music? [GUNSHOT IN DISTANCE] We heard what we heard, and afterwards we didn't do anything! How would we explain why we were together at 6:00 a.
m.
on the 4th of July? - HERMIONE: Hello, Fred.
- Can I get you anything? - A job.
- I can't very well have wife of Hiram Lodge, on trial for fraud and embezzlement, balancing my books.
Oh, Hiram Oh, my God, it's Jason.
He was shot.
What were you doing down at the river so early on July 4th? - Working on some songs.
- SHERIFF KELLER: Were you alone? DILTON: I saw something at Sweetwater River.
Ms.
Grundy's car.
By the river's edge.
JUGHEAD: It's been a week since the discovery of Jason Blossom's body.
But his death is not the first, nor would it be the last casualty that the town of Riverdale would suffer.
The Twilight Drive-In where I work, my home away from home, a piece of town history, is closing for good, just when we needed a place to escape to the most.
With Sheriff Keller knocking on every door and neighbor suspecting neighbor, Riverdale, every day that passes, is becoming more like Salem during the witch trials.
And meanwhile, the girl next door, our friendly neighborhood Hitchcock blonde, Betty Cooper, was wrestling with the knowledge that her best friend, Archie Andrews, was caught up in a forbidden romance.
BETTY: "Dear Diary, Sheriff Keller doesn't know what I know, that Riverdale High's music teacher, Geraldine Grundy, was at Sweetwater River the morning Jason Blossom went missing, and that since Archie was also there, they could have been there together.
" [CELLO PLAYING] [SOFTLY] She is incredible.
She's the best.
I'm usually more of a classic rock kind of guy, but that was beautiful.
Truly.
Congratulations, Ms.
Grundy.
Thank you, both of you for coming.
No, you kidding? Archie, he wouldn't miss it.
I had to beg him to let me come.
Great.
I'll see you at school, Ms.
Grundy.
Let's go, Dad.
Well, I was thinkin' that, you know, if you're gonna be alone tonight, that we could take you out to dinner.
Oh.
No, I No, I couldn't impose.
[CHUCKLES] After everything you've done for my son, I You know, with his music, it's the least I can do.
I insist.
JUGHEAD: The Drive-In closing is just one more nail in the coffin that is Riverdale No, forget Riverdale, in the coffin of the American dream.
[STAMMERING] As the godfather of indie cinema, Quentin Tarantino, likes to say Please, God, no more Quentin Tarantino references.
What? I'm pissed.
And not just about losing my job.
The Twilight Drive-In should mean something to us.
People should be trying to save it.
In this age of Netflix and VOD, do people really want to watch a movie in a car? I mean, who even goes there? People who want to buy crack.
And cinephiles, and car enthusiasts.
Right, Bets? Totally.
JUGHEAD: Anyway, it's closing because the town owns it, but didn't invest in it.
So when an anonymous buyer made Mayor McCoy an offer, she couldn't refuse Anonymous buyer? What do they have to hide? No one cares.
I do! Also, you guys should all come to closing night.
I'm thinking American Graffiti Or is that too obvious? I vote for anything starring Audrey Hepburn.
Or Cate Blanchett.
Or The Talented Mr.
Ripley.
Betty, your choices? Everything okay, B? Yeah, I'm just thinking.
Um Maybe Rebel Without a Cause? [BOTH SNICKER] HERMIONE: Here you go, kids.
Thanks, Mom.
If I would have known Mama Lodge was working as a waitress at Pop's, I never would have given Veronica a spot on the Vixens.
It's off-brand, and sends a false message about acceptance.
After her TMZ-style take-down of Chuck, all the Vixens kind of like Veronica now.
Do they? Be sure to put all that cash in the register.
You are a Lodge, after all, and Lodges are known to have sticky fingers.
- Cheryl - Honey, I got this.
Cheryl, I went to school with your mother.
She didn't know the difference between having money and having class, either.
[DOOR BELL CHIMING] Now, that's an odd combo of people.
- I'll be right back.
- No, Betty.
JUGHEAD: No.
Don't Wait, what's happening? Hey, Betty.
Hi, Mr.
Andrews, Ms.
Grundy.
Archie, can I talk to you? Sure.
I'll call you later? BETTY: No.
Actually, now.
Just school stuff.
Outside? Archie, as your best friend, is there anything you want to tell me? I don't think so.
[SIGHS] Ms.
Grundy was at Sweetwater River on July 4th.
Were you with her? Did Jughead tell you? Jughead knows about this? What's happening out there? Do we know? Is it about me? I have a strong inkling, and no.
Also, I'd let it go.
Yes, but you're you, and I'm me.
You do you, girl, I'll be back.
What was it like before she got here? I honestly cannot remember.
It's not what you're thinking.
So, it's platonic? Okay, well, maybe it's a little like - what you're thinking - Archie.
Are you and Ms.
Grundy, like, together, like, romantically? Oh, my God.
You and your music teacher are having an affair? We are together.
Look, I know that sounds bad, but VERONICA: Bad? It sounds scandalous.
It sounds like jail time to me.
Illegal! - Betty, don't go there.
- Oh, I'm already there.
Ronnie, a little help here? [STUTTERING] I mean, technically, Betty's right.
And ethically Well, what is Grundy to you, anyway, your girlfriend? - [SIGHS] - Your booty tutor? I don't know, I don't know what to call her.
You said you were at the river alone.
You lied to Sheriff Keller, to all of us.
Why? To protect her? She believed in me when no one else did.
Okay, we get it.
Betty, say something, please.
[CAR HONKS] Get in the car, Betty.
Now.
- What have I told you about those two? - Can we just go? [SIGHS] Oh, Archiekins You're in it deep this time.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING] Turn down the music.
[VOLUME DECREASING] I spy with my little eye Hermione Lodge, full of secrets.
Riddle me this, hair models of the damned, why is Veronica's mother having a clandestine tete-a-tete with a Southside Serpent behind a dumpster at Pop's? MAN: Yeah, so we agree.
[ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES] How hard it would even be, if I've me a little heads-up? Look, I am, by nature, a conscientious objector.
Not saying anything to either you or Betty, was the most moral, apathetic choice I could make.
But, Jug.
She's not going to write about me and Grundy in the paper, is she? Like she did with Chuck? [SCOFFS] Dude, seriously? [SOFTLY] Okay.
Come on.
Think about what you're asking.
If there was even an iota of a chance that something could hurt you in any way, Betty wouldn't do it.
- Probably.
- Oh, my God.
I'm kidding.
But maybe she has a point.
What do you see happening with Grundy, long-term? What do you want? [SIGHS] I want to be with her.
I don't know how, but I wanna hang on to what we have for as long as possible.
Yup.
I feel that.
Trying to hold on to something a lot older than me, too.
Just If Betty's gonna do anything crazy, can you please let me know so I can do something to stop it? Thank you for taking the time, Ms.
Grundy.
Like I said, the Blue and Gold is doing a series of articles spotlighting teachers, and you're our first.
Let's begin.
Uh, you joined the faculty last year.
Where did you move to Riverdale from? Um, here and there.
I was just mostly on the road.
But you've taught at other schools, I'm assuming? [LAUGHS] Oh, yeah.
Of course.
- Yeah.
- Right.
Um Can I get their names? [LAUGHS] Seaside High, Centreville High.
What made you leave? They were temporary placements.
Just filling in for maternity, sabbatical, things like that.
This is my first permanent position.
Getting back to music, you're working with Archie Andrews on an independent study.
Have you ever done this sort of thing before? - Yes.
Last year.
- Oh.
With Tomoko Yoshido and Jason Blossom.
Jason? - Before - Such a tragedy.
He was an inspiration.
And pretty cute, right? I don't think of my students that way.
- [GASPS] No, no, no, no - And I'm sorry, I really should prepare for my next class.
It's this quintessential rite of passage, making out with your boy or girlfriend at the movies.
- [SIGHS] - Why don't we go together? I can't promise you any action, but maybe I'll bring you good luck.
Great.
Another night, another hag.
- [LAUGHS] - CHERYL: Speaking of hags Veronica, it's so devastating to me that your mother has to sink to such unspeakable lows just to keep those knockoff Hermes bags on your arm.
What's next, selling her hair extensions? My mom's a waitress, Cheryl, not Fantine.
And your faux concern reeks of ulterior motive.
What is it? Only to remind you of your place in this school, nay, the town's social hierarchy.
Threatened much? Don't worry.
You may be a stock character from a '90s teen movie, but I'm not.
And what does any of this have to do with my mom being a waitress? It's just that I saw her talking to a Southside Serpent last night, in the alley behind Pop's.
They were having an extremely heated, intimate discussion.
See for yourself.
Who or what is a Southside Serpent? They're this gang of bikers who pretty much stays on the south side of town.
And thank God, 'cause they're sort of dangerous.
Drug dealers and petty thieves.
Then what was my mom doing with one of them? [SIGHS] Ugh.
HERMIONE: Who knew working would be so Tiring.
- Mom.
- Hmm? Cheryl showed me a picture.
You were standing behind Pop's with a Southside Serpent.
Those guys are thugs.
What were you doing? First off, you have nothing to worry about.
Come here, sit.
Now, remember Veronica, I grew up here.
The Southside Serpents may be from the wrong side of the tracks, but I went to high school with some of them.
I was just being polite.
Cheryl said it looked like you were arguing.
Arguing? [CHUCKLES] Hardly.
He made a lewd comment, and I put him in his place.
- Mom, if you're in some kind of trouble - I'm not.
Mija.
And when have I ever lied to you? MAYOR MCCOY: I'm sorry, but the Twilight Drive-In? It's a blight that's become a cesspool, and a hangout for criminals [STUTTERING] and transients, and the deal's done.
Andrews Construction is scheduled to demolish the lot on Monday.
Mayor McCoy, when I was a kid, my family and I would go to the drive-in all the time.
We couldn't afford tickets for everyone, so my sister Jellybean and I would hide in the trunk until we parked.
We'd sneak out.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] It's like my home.
That's a very sweet sentiment, Mr.
Jones.
But the future of Riverdale is at stake.
Ms.
Grundy showed up in Riverdale a year ago, out of thin air.
There's no record of her before that.
Her Facebook, her Linkedln account, they were all created one year ago.
Before that, she's a ghost.
She doesn't exist.
The only Geraldine Grundy I could find was a woman who died seven years ago.
How Where did you find all this? The deep web.
The dark internet.
Check it, it's all online.
Simple googling.
And did you cyber-stalk Ms.
Grundy before or after you interviewed her for a fake article? Why are you doing this, Betty? - I'm not in any danger.
- You don't know that.
Yeah, I do, I'm with her.
I know what we have, and you don't.
She taught Jason Blossom.
Did you know that? She's taught a lot of people, Betty.
What's your point? My point is, you don't know anything about her, Archie.
- Doesn't that worry you? - Betty, let this go.
- Archie, please - If you're really my friend, you'll let this go.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I'm done.
I'll stop digging.
ARCHIE: I know it's not the drive-in, but given our circumstances It's perfect.
Is everything okay? We've always been so focused on me, my music, we never get to talk about you and your life.
- What do you wanna know? - I dunno.
Stuff.
Anything.
Have you always wanted to be a teacher? No.
[LAUGHS] No, I, um I graduated Juilliard, and I auditioned at Carnegie Hall, Lincoln Center, all the big symphonies, but I didn't make the cut.
Not even close.
I had a dream.
Sometimes that's all they are.
Just dreams.
And what about us? Is this a dream? Would that be so bad? If it is It's a nice dream.
Where does this end, Geraldine? I have no idea.
But we're here.
And for me That's enough.
So much for letting this go.
Are we really breaking into Grundy's car right now? How do you even know how to do that? [LAUGHS] My dad and I fix cars together.
Thank God, she drives an old Okay, before going any further, if I'm committing a felony, I need to at least ask the question.
Are you doing this because you still have feelings for Archie, or No, Veronica.
We're doing this because Grundy has Archie under some kind of sexual spell, and he won't listen to reason.
We're looking for anything that proves Grundy isn't as clean as she says she is.
Bobby pin.
Okay, Ms.
Gyver.
I learned that from the Nancy Drew - detective handbook.
- Okay, go.
BETTY: [WHISPERING] Oh, my God.
VERONICA: Oh, my God.
"Jennifer Gibson"? Who the hell is Jennifer Gibson? That's not the only thing.
Oh, God.
Please don't tell me you're still on this crazy witch hunt.
It's not a witch hunt, and it's not crazy.
- We were just in Grundy's car - What? - You were in her car? - VERONICA: Yeah, and thank God we were.
- We found a gun.
- What? And an ID with the name Jennifer Gibson.
This is proof Ms.
Grundy is not who she says she is.
Then who is she? Obviously some sketch-queen named Jennifer Gibson.
Archie, what if she had something to do with Jason's murder? She taught him, she made you lie about him, we know she was at the river, she has a gun.
So does Dilton Doiley, but you never thought he killed Jason.
Open your eyes, Archie.
Jason was her student last year.
Everything about her is a huge, boldfaced question mark.
Okay, whatever her name is, she's not a killer.
You didn't ask her, did you? About her name? And why there's no record of her before last year? - [SIGHS] - Why not? Mayor McCoy says you won the contract to tear down the drive-in.
I did.
Look, I'm sorry, Jughead.
I know how much you love the Twilight, and so do I Mr.
Andrews, just give me one week to track down the person who bought the land, and convince them not to demolish a holy house of cinema.
It's a big contract for me, Jug, and for my guys.
Whatever they build in the place of the drive-in could mean more jobs Yeah, in what? Some hypothetical future? You put one Jones out of work, why don't you put out another, huh? Jug, your dad was taking materials from one of our job sites.
I had to let him go.
Right.
You did what you had to do, like you're doing here now.
[SCOFFS] Later.
- Jug.
- [DOOR OPENS] [DOOR SHUTS] You're late, Hermione.
I had to make a pit stop.
And as we discussed, Madam Mayor A donation to your re-election campaign.
And Lodge Industries gets the Twilight Drive-In.
It's one of the most prime pieces of real estate in Riverdale.
No one can know that I helped goose this deal along.
Especially not the Blossoms.
Your secret will be safe with me, so long as you hold up your end of the bargain.
[DOOR OPENS AND SHUTS] [LAUGHS] Are you just gonna stand there? [CHUCKLES] Archie Talk to me.
What is it? Is your real name Jennifer Gibson? Who are you? And what are you really doing here? - Archie - Why the new identity, the moving place-to-place? Tell me the truth, please.
I Was in a bad relationship.
A relationship I was married to a man who would come home from work every night, late, and drunk, and with a temper.
One night, I ended up in the emergency room with broken ribs and a shattered collarbone.
The next morning, he barely even remembered the fight, and he promised that it wouldn't happen again.
But It did, again.
So I left.
And I got a divorce, changed my name Then I came here.
And I Well I met you.
[EXHALES] [SOBS] Nice murder wall, True Detective.
[KEVIN CHUCKLES] - Here's your High Point, Dad.
- Thanks, bud.
You need somethin'? Can I borrow the truck for the drive-in? - You got a date? - No, I'm going with Veronica.
Oh, okay.
I mean, is there not a nice gay kid at your school? Yeah.
There is.
Me.
[CHUCKLES] All right.
No cruising guys tonight.
Okay? We both know what goes on in those woods.
- Oh, my God, Dad - No, I'm dead serious.
All right, we've got a murderer on the loose and a lot of unsavory characters in that part of town.
So, if you go, you stay in the truck.
- [WHISPERS] All right.
- Okay? Together.
We're sorry to come unannounced, Fred.
It's been a rough couple of months for us, - but Alice and I - We think that Archie and Betty should stop spending time together.
Their relationship isn't good, for either of them, and their respective behavior reflects that.
All right.
So, if there was anything that you could do on your end My son's a good kid.
I live next door, Fred.
I see him sneaking out at night, slinking off into the darkness at all hours.
Alice Are you spying on us? Come on, Hal.
We said what we came to say, it's on him if he ignores us.
BETTY: Oh, my God.
Intense, right? That's why she has a fake identity and keeps a gun.
It still doesn't make what she did to you okay.
She didn't do anything.
Betty, you have to accept that.
And I'm all she has, right now.
You're in over your head, Arch.
You're in this relationship with this person who is cutting you off from everyone else in your life.
Just think about what you're doing, Archie.
Not ont for your sake, but Ms.
Grundy's.
Is this really what's best for her? I am gonna deal with this, but on my terms, not yours.
Good day, Ms.
Hermione.
From the dry cleaners.
Ah, thank you, Smithers.
And Fred Andrews is escorting me to the drive-in, so all the pieces are in place.
- The drive-in with Fred Andrews? - Yes.
An attractive woman going with an old friend is less conspicuous than an old crone going alone.
You're not an old crone, Ms.
Hermione.
Of course not.
That was a joke.
[DOOR SHUTS] [HUMMING] - Finally.
- What's wrong? What's wrong is my daughter is hiding a gun in her bedroom, and that's just for starters.
- [WHISPERING] I can explain - Oh, you will.
- [GUN DROPS] - Now, get in the car.
[MOVIE DIALOGUE PLAYING THROUGH SPEAKERS] [CAR DOOR OPENS AND SLAMS] Make some room, outcasts.
I'm having deja vu.
Yeah, senior year, we're here, watching Candyman.
- God, I hated that movie.
- [LAUGHING] - You picked it.
- Mmm.
Did you think I'd get scared, and jump into your arms like a damsel in distress? You did kiss me that night.
The briefest of flings.
- You kissed me.
- [CHUCKLES] [CELL PHONE CHIMES] Is everything all right? Yes.
I'm still hungry.
I'm gonna get some popcorn.
- Oh, I'll come.
- No.
It's fine.
I'm gonna powder my nose.
Excuse me.
Alice! I'm sorry to interrupt your adultery, Fred, but you need to come with me.
Alice, what It's about the kids.
KEVIN: That hair.
VERONICA: That jacket.
Jason always adored the drive-in.
[ALL LAUGHING] [KEVIN SNICKERS] Southside trash.
They've been doing that since the opening credits.
Shh! - Screw off! - Nice haircut, you dweeb.
[ALL SHUSHING] [SIGHS] Hey! You know what happens to a snake when a Louis Vuitton heel steps on it? Shut the hell up, or you'll find out! [ALL APPLAUDING] I cannot believe you just threatened a gang-banger.
I've dealt with worse in the East Village.
I just hate when people disrespect my cinematic experience.
[EXHALES DEEPLY] How about a refill? Yeah, Kev, how about a refill? Cherry cola, as always.
Can I get a refill? And some gummy worms and a cola.
And a hot dog? Who am I trying to impress? We're out of dogs.
Figures.
[WRAPPERS RUSTLE] Not so tough without your beard, huh? [PAPER RUSTLING] Where's the rest of it? The rest of it? It was my understanding that that was the agreed-upon amount.
[TUTTING] In that case, maybe we need to have a word with your husband.
Good luck with that.
As long as Hiram's in jail, you'll be dealing with me.
Mmm-hmm.
- Is that a problem? - Mmm.
Enjoy the movie, Hermione.
We'll be in touch.
[KNOCK ON DOOR] No drive-in for you tonight? I got you something.
Is this to make me feel better about my tragic past? No.
It's a It's a thank-you gift for everything you've done for me.
[SOFTLY] Archie [PAPERS RUSTLE] This [SIGHS DEEPLY] You cannot afford this.
I pawned one of my guitars.
Why? You don't need to thank me.
You shouldn't thank me.
Ms.
Grundy, I don't, I don't want to end our lessons, but But that's what you think we should do? Don't you? [BREATHES DEEPLY] So, that bow is a goodbye gift? [CHUCKLES SOFTLY] It's a see-you-around-the-halls gift.
- A don't-forget-me gift.
- [CHUCKLES] That is hardly likely.
[ARCHIE SIGHS] ALICE: Well, well, well.
There they are.
What did I tell you? Can someone tell me what's going on here? Of course.
Archie, would you like to share with us what you and Mrs.
Robinson have been doing during your "music lesson"? And please don't leave out any of the lurid details, because Betty here keeps a very meticulous diary, and I'm more than happy to fill in the details.
[MAN GRUNTING AND PANTING] Okay, okay.
This time I really need to go.
I'm Joaquin, by the way.
Give me your phone.
This is my number.
Use it.
Kevin Keller [STUTTERING] As in Sheriff Keller? Is that a problem? Is this a problem? I won't tell if you won't.
ALICE: I never thought that I would live to see the day.
I thought the one thing that we could keep our Riverdale safe from was child predators.
Ms.
Grundy's not a predator.
She's a good person Archie, you don't have to defend me.
No, he doesn't.
Well, they're not denying it, are they? They're clearly guilty.
I think the next step is we take this to Sheriff Keller, and let the wheels of justice take over.
Dad, you can't let that happen.
- Son, it's complicated.
- She didn't force me to do anything, I went after her.
Everything that happened, I wanted it to happen.
There's no surprise there.
Why are you doing this, Mom? Putting Ms.
Grundy on trial? This isn't just about her.
This is about him.
I want you see what kind of person Archie truly is.
Wait a minute, that is what this is about? Your crazy grudge against my teenage son? I'm never going to stop being friends with Archie, Mom.
- Ever.
- FRED: We are done here.
- Oh, we are far from being done here.
- Stop.
- FRED: Shut up.
- Stop! ARCHIE: Please.
You're right, Mrs.
Cooper.
You're right.
I'm selfish, and I'm stupid, and I don't deserve to be your daughter's friend.
But please, don't hurt Ms.
Grundy because you wanna hurt me.
This isn't about hurting anyone, Archie.
It's about doing what's right, and, of course, informing our neighbors.
Alice, I swear to God - You swear to God - Publish one word about this, Mom, and I will tell everyone that I broke into Ms.
Grundy's car.
- Betty - That I robbed her, and made up the story of their affair.
It will be like, I finally Snapped.
- Like Polly.
- Betty It'll prove what everyone already thinks about us.
"Crazy runs in that family.
" Like mother, like daughter.
- You wouldn't dare.
- MS.
GRUNDY: I'll quit.
I'll quit my job.
Will that satisfy you? Yeah, it will.
It has to.
And I absolutely would dare, Mom.
She has to leave town.
- The hell she does.
- Son.
Why does she need to leave town? - Because it's what's best.
- [SCOFFS] And Alice will keep her word.
I will.
I'll pack up my things, I'll be gone by morning.
Ms.
Grundy.
How'd you like the movie? Quite the twist ending.
KEVIN: Oh, my God.
[DOOR UNLOCKS] - HERMIONE: Veronica.
- What the hell was that? I saw you with that biker guy, that Serpent.
And don't tell me you were just being polite.
I was handling some unfinished business for your father.
I'm gonna need more than that, Mom.
Details, specifics.
All right, then.
Your father hired the Southside Serpents to help decrease the value of the drive-in's land so he could purchase it at a cheaper price using an offshore LLC.
What you saw was me paying them for a job well done.
So Daddy's the anonymous buyer? And he's doing this from jail? He has an extremely long reach, your father.
And he's sunk every last penny that we have into this deal.
So Dad really is Dad is a businessman.
He saw an opportunity, and he took it.
And it was happening anyway.
Old Riverdale's dying.
He's just simply helping it along.
- But it's wrong.
- Wrong? Well, did you like living at the Dakota with a Central Park view? Did you like your personal shopping account at Barneys? How about our family dinners at Jean Georges? Your Hermes? - Those were just things, Mom - That was our life, Ronnie, provided to us by your father.
Understand? [CAR DOOR SHUTS] [FRED SIGHS] You are not those things you said.
You're not stupid.
This wasn't your fault.
ALICE: Betty.
Polly kept so, so many secrets from us.
I won't have any more secrets between us.
Not anymore.
Not if I'm gonna keep you safe.
What's my name, Mom? Say it.
- Elizabeth Cooper.
- That's right.
I am Elizabeth, I am not Polly.
Archie is not Jason.
So stop using them as an excuse to control my life! [SNIFFLES] BETTY: "Dear Diary, love makes you do crazy things, and maybe some of what I did was wrong, but maybe Maybe I was right about some things, too.
Maybe Ms.
Grundy was dangerous in some way.
Tomorrow morning, when we wake up, the world will, yet again, be changed.
" They'll tear that booth down, too.
Raze the whole place.
Send it to the junkyard.
And us with it.
Yeah Maybe they'll save it.
All the pieces.
Store it in the town hall attic, and rebuild it in a hundred years.
Wonder who the hell we were.
Hmm.
So where are you gonna live now? I'll figure it out, Dad.
I always do.