So Random! (2011) s01e06 Episode Script

Coco Jones

Well Emily, looks like good news.
I don't need braces.
No, I meant good news for me You are going to need braces.
But, Dr.
Goldstein, That means I'll never be cool again.
Well, I think I have something.
That might put your mind at ease.
Girls? Tell Emily that wearing braces can be cool, Bracey girrlz style.
What what? brace yourself for a brand-new beat I got these crazy shiny things on my teeth my molars curve right, canines curve ft and now I've got the smell of metal on my breath it's insane in my brain my grill makes me ill 'cause my teeth got the chain metal greta has metal glued on her teeth but I got it worse, call the dental police before I proceed, gonna give this disclaimer I'm wearing one butt-ugly plastic retainer now I got food stuck in my braces everyone's pointing, making weird faces now we have a whole list of things we can't eat I'm gonna lay 'em on you, yo, metal, drop me a beat - difficulty flossing - Apples, gum, caramel, toffee what's the point in living till these things are off me? this plastic is drastic, it's making me spastic but then I guess you've never felt the pull of elastic.
.
Excuse me, Dr.
Goldstein, It's time for you to break it down.
Oh snap! they call me Dr.
G 'cause that's my starting fee if your teeth are messed up, come have a seat with me I'll mangle your mouth and stretch out your lips while all my hygienists be shaking their hips now I spit when I talk and it hurts when I eat but there's a girl who's got it worse that I think you should meet - she's part of our cre - Her mouth's full of drama - give it up for the snaggle-toothed - But still hot ♪ gearhianna ♪ ♪ so if you see us on the street and you think you can take us ♪ you can't hurt us 'cause we've got braces on our faces! - Teeth out! - What what? - I want braces! - Ha, word to your molar.
"so random!" it's a party, get down - "so random!" - It's a party, get down "so random!" it's a party, get down shake that, shake that all around a fantastic journey, a little bit of this and that you know we gonna chill, might not come back so if you're ready, get set 'cause it's time to roll with "so random!" stuff that's out of control surprises flying 'cause life's a riot so ride with us 'cause you need to try it we're on the way, it's time to hang so let's get random and do our thing come on It's a party, get down "so random!" it's a party, get down "so random!" it's a party, get down shake that, shake that all around "so random!" Give it up for Nico Harris! Welcome to "so random!" everybody.
We've got a great show for you tonight.
But please just one quick reminder, Please turn off your cell phones.
Uh, and your cameras.
And your baby monitors.
And your cows.
What? Oh seriously, come on now.
Who's bowling? Come on, y'all, we've got a show to start.
What's going on? Heh.
Oh oh.
Hold on one second.
I gotta take this.
Ahem, hello? Oh hey, Chad.
What's up, man? - I'm in the middle of my intro.
- Oh yeah, I know.
Hold on one second, Nico.
What? Coco Jones is here, everybody.
- Did you just steal my intro? - Well, I'm sorry, Nico.
If you wanted to do the intro, you should have turned off your cell phone.
- Oh, hang on.
- What? Do not put me on hold! We've got a great show tonight, so stick around, everybody.
- Whoo! - It's a party , get down shake that, shake that all around "so random!" shake that, shake that all around! Yearbook fraud classmates writing blatant lies.
On the last three pages of your yearbook.
And those lying liars have always gotten away with it.
But not anymore! I'm Sally Jensen: Kid lawyer.
And I fight for you! Julie Brooks wrote in my yearbook.
You're "2 kewl 2 b4gotten.
" But when I saw her at the supermarket, She didn't know who I was.
So I called Sally Jensen.
Call me, Sally Jensen: Kid lawyer.
By the time I was done with Julie Brooks, She knew exactly who Kevin was.
- All I did was sign a yearbook.
- With lies.
Thanks, Sally.
You're "2 kewl 2 b4gotten.
" Whether they lie about K.
I.
T.
or B.
F.
F.
, I'll fight for the truth! My boyfriend Brian wrote "have a gr8 summer," And I didn't.
It's not my fault she had a bad summer.
Her dog died.
Pick that up, yearbook liar.
Thanks, Sally.
It's what sparky would have wanted.
I promise justice in every case.
Of false yearbook inscription, Including but not limited to "let's hang out," "don't ever change," "it's been real," Smiley face, "stay cool forever.
" So remember, if someone lies.
In your yearbook, call me And I'll throw the book at them.
Ow! Pick that up, yearbook liar.
I'm Sally Jensen and I fight for you! So what do you think? Talk to the hand.
- So you asked her out, right? - Yeah.
- What did she say? - She told me to talk to the hand.
You know what? She's right.
We need to talk to the hand.
Bonjour! Did someone want to talk to the hand? Nolan! Ah, let me guess you gentlemen are having, How you say, lady trouble? How'd you know? Aha, my friends, I come from Paris, The city of love.
I know of these things.
You hear that? He knows of these things.
- Up top, nolan.
Yeah! - What? Ahh! Ooh! S-sorry.
My bad.
Up top? Up top? This is like slamming me into the arc de triomphe! Come come.
Come here.
- Oh, okay.
- Come closer.
A little bit closer.
Oh, okay.
Hey, what's up, buddy? You've got to use your croissants! - Think think! - Aah! The name is nolan.
You guys, I am so excited.
For you to meet my new boyfriend, the australian supermodel.
Yeah, us too.
It's kind of all you've been talking about.
Ha ha, for weeks.
Well, it's not every day you get to date An australian supermodel.
Oh my gosh, he's here! - Angus! - Whoa.
Angy! Isn't he gorgeous? Ket your gorgeousness over here.
Oh oh! Hi.
I'm Angus.
I'm a tippity-top model from Australia.
My hobbies include.
Doing sit-ups and having abs for days.
Do you wanna see my best pose? - No, it's okay.
- No, I don't wanna Okay, there it is.
Oh, angy, stop! You know that pose drives me crazy! .
Really? - How was work today, honey? - It was hard.
Being a tippity-top model from Australia.
Isn't all fun and games, you "knorr"? I know.
Ask him what he's working on.
Um, what are you working on? I'm in the middle of doing a photo shoot.
For "shins weekly" magazine.
- He has got the best shins.
- Have you seen my shins? They're perfect.
They're like sticks.
Uh, is that good? Oh, shins like that don't just happen, you know? - You have to put in time at the gym.
- It's true.
Ah ah! I'm there four to seven hours a day, sometimes more.
How can you spend four hours in a gym? What do you do? Oh, my Agent is always on me about looking my best.
She says to me, "angy, If your shins aren't perfect, "Then you won't get the job.
" And I said, "I knorr.
" I I don't really understand what you're saying.
Do you wanna see my abs? Oh, he has got abs for days.
You guys, this is how he got discovered.
Tell them the story.
This is a great story! I was in the park.
Doing sit-ups.
And my Agent came up to me and said, "Angus, you've got abs for days.
" And I said, "I knorr.
" Isn't that a great story? I love that story! Yeah.
Awesome story.
- On that noteyou look at the - Look at the time.
- Time time.
Time.
- Yeah, we gotta Oh, I'll never forget what my Agent said to me.
Before my first photo shoot.
She said, "angus, don't be nervous.
- Don't be scared.
" - I'm not scared.
And I said, "I won't.
" Angy, you know that pose drives me crazy! "yer.
" What? Let's go.
Look, they'll never notice we left.
I'm I'm right behind I'm right behind you.
Oh, angy, you know when you do shin-ups.
It drives me crazy! I knorr.
- Hey, curt.
- Yes, Darryl? Here she comes.
Hey, Becca.
- Oh.
- And there she goes.
Ah, we meet again.
Nolan.
This girl you desire she is cheerleader, no? - Yes.
- Then to win her heart you must speak her language.
Oh! The language of love? No, basketball.
Show me your game, player.
I am, how you say, open.
Oh, bonjour, my pretty.
Ooh-la-la! Oh! Right in the ooh-la-las.
Are you okay, nolan? Okay? Okay? Never hit a hand in the ooh-la-las.
It is like being thrown off the eiffel tower.
And landing on your ooh-la-las.
Come here.
- Come come closer.
- Okay.
You've got to use your croissant! - Think think! - I know, I know, I know.
The name is nolan.
All right, class, welcome back.
Let's kick things off by going around the room.
And hearing what everyone did this summer.
Paul? Well, I broke my leg, my turtle died.
And my girlfriend is dating my brother.
So a pretty good summer.
Okay.
What about you, Janice? Oh, I I finished the required reading list, So I started next year's reading list.
Oh! she's a bit of a bookworm, gonna ace that midterm she's smart.
.
Uh, Janice, what was that? Who are these girls? They're my backup singers.
used to work for j.
Lo, gotta find new cash flow we're broke.
.
My mom got them for me over the summer.
To make me more popular.
she was a loser, not a single friend, her huh-uh, no way, lonely.
.
That was very strange.
But I suppose it's all right.
As long as they're not too disruptive.
- Okay.
- All right, class, we have a lot to cover.
- Hey! Ugh.
- Janice, what's wrong? Uh Nothing.
- Just got excited about learning.
- Oh.
she got hit with a spitball it was this jerk Paul - he's a bully bully - Ow.
Hey.
- Ah, hey.
- Bully bully bully.
Paul, detention.
Wh ? Oh! Janice, you're such a tattletale! Hey, it wasn't me.
It was my stupid backup singers.
girl, don't you lash out at us or we'll be on the next bus all aboard, toot toot.
.
But you're making things worse.
better watch that tone, girl or we'll tell 'em you like Earl.
- Ooh.
- Oh no.
Hey, that was a secret! check out her notebook it's got an "earl," look she's been doodling doodling doodling doodling doodling doodling doodling doodling doodling "Earl.
" .
Oh, you're ruining my life! No no no, wait.
Hold on a minute.
You like me? I like you too.
Since when? Well, I can't exactly put my finger on it, But there's just something more Entertaining about you, you know? How about you and me become boyfriend and girlfriend? What you think about that? girl, better get ready Earl wants to go steady have a breath mint.
.
Oh, more entertaining, huh? Janice, could I borrow your backup singers? I've been trying to get a date with a certain librarian.
Sure, just have 'em back by 6:00.
Oh.
girl, better make it 8:00 'cause teacher ain't lookin' too great maybe get him a new tie, then he'll look real fly - hey, that's a good shirt - Not really, just trying to flirt flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' flirtin' Earl.
.
Hey, he's mine! There she is.
I'm gonna make my move.
- Okay, here I go.
- Here you go.
- It's show time.
- Can't wait.
- This is happening.
- Not fast enough.
Ooh! Oh hey hey, Becca.
Want to, how you say, go on a date? Bonjour, mes amis.
Nolan, what are you doing stealing my girl? No, I was whispering sweet nothings in her ear.
- I knew it.
- Sweet nothings about you.
Yeah.
And you sound like a really nice guy.
Your move, monsieur.
Okay, so ahem, wanna get some ice cream? - I'd love to.
- Yeah.
A a backpack? A backpack? This is like putting my neck on the guillotine.
I'm s-sorry.
Sorry.
Come here.
A little closer.
Oh, isn't this romantic? You've got to use your croissant! Think think! The name is nolan.
Give it up for tonight's special guest: Coco Jones.
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah see you sittin' there and all you do is nod your head why don't you get up on the dance floor instead? it's all about having fun, not about looking cool so grab your crew and let me see what you can do pop, lock, drop, boy, I could be so fly the way your body move, dude, you know you mystify we know that you're the dude, without a doubt, no lie everything you do is so fly and justified nod your head and sway with me let me see you get pumped and feel the beat nod your head and sway with me come on, you gotta stand up, baby stand up, stand up, can you feel the beat? stand up, stand up, let me hear you scream stand up, stand up, throw it in the air come on, everybody, let me see you whip your hair stand up, stand up, let me see you move stand up, stand up, you know how we do eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh everybody stand up yeah yeah yeah yeah let me see you stand up stand up, stand up yeah yeah yeah yeah on the floor, rock it like you never have before d.
J.
, drop the beat, yeah, I wanna hear some more check me and my girls, yeah, we 'ut to set it off gonna blow it up, now you know who's the boss take note, we're gonna teach you how to rock it out strike it so hot, got the crowd going loud everybody get wild, you know what I mean throw it up, nod your head and let me hear you scream nod your head and sway with me let me see you get pumped and feel the beat nod your head and sway with me come on, you gotta stand up, baby stand up, stand up, can you feel the beat? stand up, stand up, let me hear you scream stand up, stand up, throw it in the air come on, everybody, let me see you whip your hair stand up, stand up, let me see you move stand up, stand up, you know how we do eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh everybody stand up so stand up, shawty, and watch what I do take over the floor, just me and my crew lookin' all fly with my skinny jeans on and my moves so sharp, gonna get my dance on as I groove to my left, then jerk to my right droop to my left, then twork to my right move to my left, then work to my right then I'm coming on, y'all coming coming on, y'all, stand up nod your head and sway with me let me see you get pumped and feel the beat nod your head and sway with me come on, you gotta stand up, baby stand up, stand up, can you feel the beat? stand up, stand up, let me hear you scream stand up, stand up, throw it in the air come on, everybody, let me see you whip your hair stand up, stand up, let me see you move stand up, stand up, you know how we do eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh, eh oh everybody stand up yeah yeah yeah yeah let me see you stand up stand up, stand up yeah yeah yeah yeah.
.
Thank you, everybody.
You've been a great audience.
Give it up for coco Jones! Good night! Good night, everybody! "so random!" get down arty, "so random!" it's a party, get down shake that, shake that all around a fantastic journey, and that it of this you know we gonna chill, might not come back so if you're ready, to roll cause it's time with "so random!" stuff that's out of control surprises flying 'cause life's a riot so ride with us 'cause you need to try it we're on the way, it's time to hang so let's get random and do our thing, come on it's a party, get down!
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