So Random! (2011) s01e23 Episode Script

China Anne McClain

I'm watching Mr.
Goodman! He doesn't play by the rules! I'm watching Angus! He's so funny! "I knowrr!" Are you kids tired of watching sketches.
- That are entirely random? - No, we love them.
Sounds like you're ready for a change.
- No.
- We're not.
Introducing a sketch show.
For you serious kids "So logical.
" Ugh, that sounds awful.
I'm glad you want to hear more about the show.
Fine.
Does it have lots of zany characters.
With goofy catch phrases? Oh, you mean like, "oh, you're not gonna believe this," or "don't mean to bragbut Holla!" Yeah! No, it does not.
"So logical" only has one character Me Howard t.
Earnest.
And I only use phrases.
That are intentionally non-catchy, such as "please pass the lima beans" and "I beg your pardon?" Um, okay.
Are there lots of hilarious jokes? No, there are no jokes whatsoever, only historical reenactments.
- Ugh.
- Does your show at least have cool guest stars? You mean like China Anne McClain.
- Of "a.
N.
T.
Farm"? - Yeah! No, it does not.
The only guest stars on "so logical" are extremely serious, such as your school superintendent.
Or actual entomologists with actual ant farms.
No offense, but I don't think anyone.
In their right mind would watch that show.
Are very intrigued by your television program.
And would, in fact, love to be a guest star on it.
I'm sorry, but I don't believe.
You're right for this program.
Fine, then I'll just guest star.
On "so random!" Instead.
China Anne McClain! Hey, this feels like a party.
- No, it does not.
- Let's get down.
No.
No, it is not a party.
Please do not get down.
"So random!" it's a party, get down - "so random!" - it's a party, get down "so random!" it's a party, get down shake that, shake that all around a fantastic journey, a little bit of this and that you know we gonna chill, might not come back so if you're ready, get set 'cause it's time to roll with "so random!" Stuff that's out of control surprises flying 'cause life's a riot so ride with us 'cause you need to try it we're on the way, it's time to hang so let's get random and do our thing come on it's a party, get down "so random!" it's a party, get down "so random!" it's a party, get down shake that, shake that all around "so random!" Give it up for the cast of "so random!" Hey hey, everybody.
Welcome to "so random!" Wow, can you believe come out heres we've.
And welcomed the audience to the show? Yeah and every one of them is memorable.
Yeah, like that one time we came out and Tawni said, "wow, can you believe come out heres we've.
And welcomed the audience to the show?" Wow, can you believe come out heres we've.
And welcomed the audience to the show? Good times, man.
Good times.
Wow.
I can't believe you remeered that.
You've got a good memory.
Speaking of good memories, how about that time Grady remembered me remembering all the times.
We've come out here to the show? The audience.
Yeah, like that one time we came out.
And Tawni said, "wow, can you believe.
How many times we've come out here.
"And welcomed the audience to the show?" Oh, time moves so fast.
Wait.
Are you guys literally reminiscing.
About stuff that happened five seconds ago? Hey, guys, guys, do you remember that time Zora called us out.
For remembering stuff that happened five seconds ago? Wait.
Are you guys literally reminiscing.
About stuff that happened five seconds ago? Really? Really, guys? What? Oh oh oh! Remember that time China Anne McClain from "a.
N.
T.
Farm" came.
And sang her hit song "unstoppable" on our show? That hasn't even happened yet! But it will.
We got a great show for you tonight, - so stick around! - Yeah! This is Percy.
Gallery three is clear and safe.
No possible trouble in sight.
All right, class, right this way.
Follow me into the aquarium.
Mr.
Goodman, this isn't the aquarium.
This is an art museum.
Oh.
Well, it does seem a little fishy.
There aren't any fishies.
Guess I won't be needing this.
Here you go.
You know, right about now, a boring old normal teacher.
Would turn around and take you where your parents think you are.
- Right about now.
- Yes yes, please.
But I don't play by the rules, so we're turning left around.
And you're takime to where your grandparents think you aren't.
Uh, I don't think any of us knows what that means.
It means we're learning about art, Steve.
Spring rolls! Yeah! Oh, velvet rope burn! Ah.
Heh heh.
At least the art's undamaged.
That would've been bad.
That would've been real bad, I'll tell you what.
Hey, let's all go look out that window.
- He just he - Let's go! Oh yeah.
That is the weirdest thing.
This window seems to be painted shut.
Uh, sir, that's not a window.
That's a painting.
Ohh! - Now, class, if you all go that way - Yes.
You'll be going the wroway 'cause the art action's over here! Psych! Gotcha! Ha ha ha! Ho ho ho.
You got us, Mr.
G.
Now, class, I believe this painting.
- Is a paint-by-numbers.
- Nope.
If you look closely, you can see a "4" right there.
Mr.
Goodman, that sign right there.
Says "please do not touch the art.
" Ha ha! I know, Lily, and a boring old normal teacher.
Would obey that sign, but I donwhat? Play by the rules.
That's right, class, so I'm going to touch the art repeatedly.
- No, you shouldn't.
- Touch touch touchity-touch.
Finger food! Oh! Oh, Mona Lisa, that hurt! Mr.
Goodman, are you okay? - You fine? - Well, Steve, I appear to have severely smashed.
My Pablo "picas-toe," but don't worry, I've got eight more.
- Eight? - Turkey burger! Yeah! Mr.
Goodman, Vincent van "gogh-in'" around the art world.
Hey, gimme back my hat! That was a priceless artifact! And it makes a great football too! Hey, go long! Yeah! All right! Oh! Touchdown! Yeah! Hope that didn't cost a lot of "monet.
" Art jokes, who's got 'em? Goodman does.
Yeah! All right.
Hey, Mr.
Goodman, that guy in that painting.
Actually kinda looks like you.
Oh, "sis-steve" chapel, I know you think of me as royalty, but I look nothing like King marfeldy of glendovia.
No, Mr.
Goodman, you do.
- All that's missing is the moustache.
- Yeah.
Oops.
Challenge accepted, Salvador "da-lily.
" Good thing I always carry a permanent marker.
Ranch dressing! Got it.
There we go.
Wow.
That's uncanny.
Hey, let's get a closer look, class.
- No, don't take it down.
- This is gonna be great.
- All right.
- Ohh! - Perfect, right? - Hey, you there! What do you think you're doing?! Quick, somebody shave my moustache! We've got a situation here! I need backup! You know, class? Maybe we should meet up with the rest of the school.
At the aquarium, like now.
Fish food! Let's go, everybody! On we go! - Manta Ray! - I got your hat.
Coming up next on "so random!" I am staking the future of this company.
On one man That guy! - Next! - Gimme a c! Gimme a R! Gimme an I Don't mean to nag.
Next! Hi.
Name, please.
Uh, Benson Green.
Okay, Benson.
A lot of people are trying out for cheerleading, so why should I pick you? Well, I'll work hard at it, I love this school, and, uh, don't mean to brag, but The last team I cheered for A-whoa whoa, a-whoa whoa, a-whoa whoa! Didn't win one game.
Hm-mmm.
Not one.
Holla! Well, are you gonna do the cricket cheer or not? Oh yeah, sorry.
Sure, I'd love to.
- Oh.
- Here we go.
Gimme a B! Gimme a R! Gimme a I don't mean to brag, but I do not know how to spell "cricket.
" Well, um, i don't mean to brag, or whatever, but Your mother has a better chance of making this squad.
Wha - Really? - Yeah, sorry.
That's That's great! Ah! Oh.
- I'm gonna call my mama.
- No, I was just kidding.
I don't Mom, mom, hey, guess what? You made the squad! Holla! Mama.
- So random! - come on, get up.
Impress the boss.
Gotta impress the boss.
Davis, time is money.
And you know I don't like wastin' neither! You promised to wow this boardroom, so g-g-g-get to wowin'.
Giddyup! Members of the board, I do not have to tell you it's been a tough year for us here.
At buff bods exercise equipment.
Okay? Orders for our exercise equipment Are saggy, okay? Our video sales are flabby.
- Get to the wowin', Davis.
- Yes yes yes yes yes.
What if I told you that all could change? Things are looking up.
Keep goin', keep goin'.
I'm staking the future of this company.
On one man This man.
Boy howdy! Now that is a mighty fine representation of my company.
No, not this guy.
That's the water guy.
That guy! Oh hi.
I'm Angus.
I'm a tippity top model from Australia.
Do you want to see my best pose? No, we most certainly do not oh, that's awful.
Ladies and gentlemen, you are standing in the presence.
Of a knight in "shinning" armor.
Angus, show the people.
It's true.
Have you seen my shins? They're perfect! They're like sticks.
He has graced the cover.
Of "shins weekly" nine times.
Well, that's just wonderful, Davis.
I'm so proud what does that have to do with saving my company?! One word! Angus thunder's.
Down under shin-ercizer.
That is a mighty long word, son.
Oh Gila! Bring it in! Oh, angy, you know when you do presentations for the shin-ercizer, it drives me crazy! Oh, that's mine.
Shin-er-what-now? It's a revolutionary new product.
To keep your shins looking their best.
It's true! Angy, tell them how you thought of it.
This is a great story.
I love this story.
I was in the park.
When my Agent came up to me.
And said, "angy, if only everyone had shins like you," and I said, "I knowrr.
" Better give me my hat back right now, son.
So I invented the shin-ercizer And now I, and you, can get "shinny" with it anywhere, be it a boardroom Or someone's lap.
Or even Oh, boomerang! Someone else's lap! Oh, angy, you know when you shin-ercize.
In a boardroom on someone else's lap.
After boomeranging, it drives me crazy! This whole thing is driving me crazy! Get off me! Davis, why would anyone want to buy one of these? Why wouldn't they? Angus has developed 19 different exercises.
For the shin-ercizer.
It's true.
Here's "the dingo" "The kangaroo" "The kangaroo double-time"! I call this one "the up against the wall.
" Now why would you call that "the up against" oh! Davis! I have got to say.
This is the single most ridiculous attempt.
At a company-saving presentation that anyone I don't care about "shins weekly" That anyone in this boardroom's ever seen! I'm so angry I could just - Shin-ercize? - Why would anybody Oh, I'm getting shinny with it.
I like it.
- Wow.
- I knowrr.
Sir, your shins are looking like sticks already.
They feel like it.
I'm gonna kangaroo over to you now.
Whoo! I'm gonna buy a million of these things.
I think we got a winner.
Or you mean a "shinner.
" Har-har-har-har-har.
A shinner! I like that.
I like that laugh too.
I'm gonna buy it.
- Har-har-har-har-har.
- Har-har-har-har-har.
Oh, angy, you know when you sell your laugh.
To a Texas millionaire at the end of a shin-ercizer presentation.
While saving a company, it drives me crazy! I knowrr.
Shake that, shake that all around next! - Name, please? - Nancy.
Great.
Nancy.
It's been nothing but disasters all day, but I have a good feeling about you.
Me too.
I think I have all my cheers down pat.
And, uh, don't mean nag, but It's cold in here.
You should really be wearing a sweater.
Or at least something with a colla! Oh no.
You're not related to that Benson kid, - are you? - Yeah, he's my brother.
He just tried out, and uh, don't mean to nag, but If you're gonna hold tryouts during lunch time, you should really put out some snacks.
It couldn't cost more than five dollas! How about we just get to the official bush cricket cheer, please? Oh! Sure sure.
Okay.
Gimme a c, gimme an r, gimme an I Don't mean to nag, but it's really hard cheering for a team.
With a bush cricket for a mascot.
You should really have something cuter.
Might I suggest a koala? Thank you, Nancy.
I will take that into consideration.
Okay, next! So I'll see you here for the callback? Oh no, sweetie.
I'm sorry, but you didn't make the squad, just like your brother.
Uh, did somebody call for hbrotha?! No.
No, I did not.
I did not.
If you don't mind, I would like to get on with try-outs now.
Oh, of course.
Although Don't mean to brag And don't mean to nag But We're a tough act to folla! Holla! More random fun is coming right up.
Stick around.
That's why they call me "crazy"! You lost it, I found it.
You want it, I got it.
At crazy Carson's lost 'n found! Ohhh tonight I'm unstoppable unstoppable incredibly strong tonight I'm unstoppable.
so random! Hey, folks, your favorite sophomore here, crazy Carson.
For Harrison high's lost 'n found.
It's spring cleaning time.
You know what that means.
Anything unclaimed is yours for the taking.
Anything? Anything! It's all for the low low price.
Of free! How can I stay in business with prices like free? That's why they call me crazy.
You lost it, I found it.
You want it, I got it.
At crazy Carson's lost 'n found! Whatever it is you're looking for, chances are I found it.
You want t-shirts? I got t-shirts T-shirts with ketchup stains, mustard stains, ink stains, possible blood stains, chemistry class stains, the-heck-this-is stains.
At crazy Carson's lost 'n found! In the mood for sweat? Don't sweat it.
I got sweatshirts, sweatpants, sweatbands, sweatsuits and sweat socks All with the original sweat.
And all for the impossibly low price of You lost it, I found it, you want it, I got it.
At crazy Carson's lost 'n found! I've got wet homework in five subjects, a gently used retainer, a "chipmunks: The squeakquel" lunchbox.
Complete with its original "squir-mos" that comes with its original milk, and one vintage petrified swimsuit Size husky! Mix and match or take it all! You lost it, I found it.
You want it, I got it.
At crazy Carson's lost 'n found.
Crazy Carson's lost 'n found.
I'm crazy! Give it up for China Anne McClain! What's up, "so random!"? Hard to take the day you just can't catch a break when it brings me down.
I get right back up 'cause I'm powerful an incredible independent girl ready for the world world world world come on! - Tonight I'm unstoppable.
- unstoppable incredibly strong - Tonight I'm unstoppable.
- unstoppable the world is calling me out out out don't want to whisper, wanna shout shout come on! - Tonight I'm unstoppable.
- unstoppable get out, get out, get out of your head get out, get out and live instead get out, get out, get out, all right yeah 'cause I'm powerful an incredible independent girl ready for the world world world world come on! - Tonight I'm unstoppable.
- unstoppable incredibly strong - tonight I'm unstoppable.
- unstoppable the world is calling me, the world is calling me out I'm gonna shout shout - come on! - yeah - you know I'm unstoppable.
- unstoppable ohhh unstoppable oh-hh yeah yeah yeah yeah.
Give it up one last time.
For China Anne McClain!