Steven Universe (2013) s03e05 Episode Script

Hit the Diamond

- Garnet: # We # - # Are the Crystal # - Steven: # Gems # - # we'll always save the day # Steven: # and if you think we can't # All: # we'll always find a way # - # that's why the people # - # of this world # - Garnet: # believe in # - # Garnet # - # Amethyst # - # and Pearl # Steven: # And Steven! # [All gasp.]
Ruby? Aah! [Grumbles.]
[Grunts.]
Ha! Hoo-whoo! How-ooh! Hiya! [Grunts.]
[Gasps.]
What a lovely planet! [Humming.]
Wait! So we just get out and walk around? Ooh! Now, where's the gem the scanners locked onto? Let's fan out and search the area! - Whoa, look at them all.
- I knew it.
They're after me.
- This is the end of the line.
- You really weren't kidding.
I disobeyed a direct order from Yellow Diamond, and I called her a clod to her face.
- Oh, honestly, you call everyone a clod.
- Yes, but not everyone has command over all the armies of Homeworld, waiting for the word to shatter me! Peridot, we won't let them get you.
- But haven't I caused you enough trouble? - Don't worry, Peridot.
It's our sworn duty to protect anything that calls this planet home.
And that includes clods like you.
That's my word.
Listen up, everyone.
I have a plan.
Or should I say we have a plan? Hello, everyone.
Both: Ruby! Sapphire! Hu-u-u-gs! - Hello, Steven.
- So, what's the plan? [Chuckles.]
You got this.
Just act casual.
Yeah, casual.
[Indistinct conversations.]
Focus, Rubies! This is an important mission from Yellow Diamond, so we can't mess it up.
Eh, hey, hey! [Chuckles.]
Uh, what are we all doing over here? Yeah, what are we all doing here? We're here to retrieve the leader of the Earth mission! Hey, wait a second.
It seems like there are more of us than usual.
- There's supposed to be five of us.
- Five Rubies! One, two, three, four, five.
- [Chuckles.]
Never mind.
- Phew! The leader of the Earth mission must be around here somewhere.
Well, she's definitely not in that barn.
Whoa! I didn't see that before.
Maybe we should look around in there.
I'll go by myself.
Gah! Bye-bye! They want to search the barn.
- We heard.
- We saw.
- I'm scared.
- Let's ambush them! No.
No one needs to get hurt.
Let's be sensible.
- What do I do? [Whimpers.]
- Just go out there and tell them this is a place where Humans live.
[Sighs.]
I don't want to go alone.
Ooh! I'll come.
I'll be your backup.
And here's some backup for your backup.
I checked the barn, and I just found a bunch of Humans.
Yep! Nothing in there but us Humans! - Really? - Looks like we failed.
Time to go back home.
[Forced chuckle.]
I think we better double-check.
- You remember what happened last time.
- Last time? [Laughter.]
Oh, Ruby, you're so forgetful.
All right, let's search the barn! - Together: Yes, Ruby! - Wait! You can't bec because, uh You have to, uh play baseball.
Yeah, it's a human thing.
If you win, you can go inside.
And if you lose, you got to leave forever.
Base ball.
All: Baseball? I saw that this was a possibility, though I am surprised that this is the path we're taking.
[Whistle blows.]
All right, my human baseball knowledge will lead us to victory.
Let's just go out there and pretend to be Humans, except Peridot.
You stay here in the barn and hide.
Okay.
Everybody in? Lapis? [Chuckles.]
This plan sucks.
We're the Humans! Steven! - Earl! - Amy! - Bob! - And Sophie! Understood.
Our team is the Rubies, consisting of Ruby! - Ruby! - Ruby! - Ruby! - Ruby! And Ruby! Here's the rules of the game we take turns throwing the ball at each other.
The batter tries to hit the ball with the bat, and then they run around the bases.
Whoever gets the most runs wins.
[Crowd cheering.]
Ah! You get three tries to hit the ball.
- If you miss - Strike one! What?! Strike two! [Grunts.]
- Strike three! - Three strikes, and you're out.
Oh, darn.
Mm, guess I'm out.
- Ohh! - You swung too slow! Do it like this! [Grunting.]
[Whack!.]
Hut, hut, hut! [Whistle!.]
Hut! And that's called a home run.
If the ball gets caught, you're out.
And if you get tagged, you're out! [Groans.]
Uh, and after three outs, we switch sides.
[Groans.]
[Pop.]
[Whack!.]
Whoa-ho-ho! [Whoosh!.]
Nice! Wow! That purple Human's really good! [Laughs nervously.]
Us Humans we're full of surprises.
[whispers.]
Amethyst, be careful! Hey, Ruby.
[Laughing.]
- Doc: Strike one! - Huh? Haven't I seen you somewhere before? I don't know.
I don't get off planet much.
[Both laughing.]
Strike two! What's going on? What are they doing? - Flirting.
- Uh-oh.
Strike three! [Pop.]
- Uh - Uh [Both laugh nervously.]
[Music.]
What?! Yeah! [Grunts.]
[All grunting.]
[Speaking indistinctly.]
[Bat whacks baseball.]
[Smack.]
[Groans.]
[Grunts.]
[Grunts.]
[Crack.]
Hey, how's it going? Are we winning? Um [laughs nervously.]
Now, what you want to do is lead with your hips.
Yeah.
That's pretty good.
Let me show you again.
Well [laughs nervously.]
we're doing just fine.
Everything's gonna be a-okay.
- You're lying to me! - Steven: To make you feel better! Thank you! Steven: All right, it's the bottom of the ninth.
We've got Lapis on second, but one more out and the game's over for us.
We need to hit a home run.
[Both laughing.]
Wait! I call a time-out! Listen, you two, I know it's hard being separated, but we have to keep them out of the barn or they're gonna find Peridot.
Remember? Ruby, stop being cute, and, Sapphire, keep your eye on the ball.
- Pun intended? - [Snaps fingers.]
What did I just say? [Grunts.]
[Grunts.]
Doc: Strike one! [Bird cawing in distance.]
Come on! I know you can do it! [Groans.]
[Grunts.]
Doc: Strike two! - Just look at the ball.
- I'm trying, but all I want to look at is you.
Don't worry, you can look at me when you're running for home.
[Foosh!.]
[Grunting.]
Whoo-ah-ah! [Grunting.]
Aaah! [Whack!.]
[All gasp.]
[Grunting.]
[Whoosh!.]
[Majestic music plays.]
[Laughing.]
Yeah! [Grunts.]
[Breathing heavily.]
Come to me! [Both laughing.]
[All gasp.]
[Laughing.]
- Whoops.
- They're Gems! - We've been tricked! - What a turn of events! - Uh - Huh? W-What? Sorry, guys.
Game is over.
That's it! Rubies, combine! [Warble!.]
[Ground rumbles.]
[Roars.]
[Screaming.]
Wait! Uh, wait! Stop! Don't hurt them! Oof! Oof! [Panting.]
Wait.
Oh, please, please! It's me you're after, right? I'm not gonna stand by and let my friends fight my battles! Aww! Peri loves us.
Are you the Peridot assigned to the failed Earth mission? Not sure if "failed" would be the right word to Where is Jasper? - You're looking for Jasper? - Correct! Wait, but I'm the one who betrayed the mission, who called Yellow Diamond a clod, the new leader of the Crystal Gems? - What? - Tell us where Jasper is, now! [Gasps.]
Jasper um, we know where Jasper is.
- Well?! - Uh Neptune! She's on the planet Neptune.
[Wind whistling.]
Well, why didn't you say so? [Sighs.]
[Warble!.]
We all here? 1234 and Ha! 5.
- To the planet Neptune! - Let's move out, soldiers.
What a lovely-sounding planet.
- But we just got here.
- Let's go, newbie! Thank you.
[Warble!.]
[Zap!.]
[Whoosh!.]
- Man, Rubies are dumb.
- Not all of them.
[Pop!.]

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