Storage Wars (2010) s01e05 Episode Script

All Guns to Port

male narrator: WHEN STORAGE UNITS ARE ABANDONED THE TREASURES WITHIN - THIS IS DO OR DIE.
narrator: ARE PUT UP FOR AUCTION - THREE.
- 400.
- YEAH.
- YEAH.
- YEAH! - SOLD.
narrator: IN THIS HIGH-STAKES GAME - YOU'VE GOT A PIECE OF HISTORICAL SIGNIFICANCE HERE.
narrator: IT'S GET RICH - YOU SELL ONE DEAD GUY TO SOMEBODY AND YOU CAN NEVER SELL 'EM ANOTHER THING.
- OH! narrator: OR DIE BUYING.
COMING UP - ARE YOU READY TO GO? all: YEAH! - THEN LET'S GO! - DON'T LOSE IT.
THAT'S YOUR INHERITANCE, KID.
- IT ONLY TAKES ONE GOOD ITEM.
- LAST AND FINAL CALL AT 620 BUCKS.
- IS THAT DARRELL BIDDING? - IT IS.
- YEAH! YOU KNOW, I MIGHT BUY THIS ROOM JUST TO PISS DARRELL OFF.
- THIS IS PROBABLY THE RAREST TELEPHONE IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
- WHAT IS SOMETHING LIKE THIS WORTH? - IT'S WORTH ABOUT TEN YEARS IN THE PEN.
[country rock music.]
- THIS IS THE WOW FACTOR.
- I'M NOT INTIMIDATED BY ANY BUYER.
- CASH IS KING.
WINNER TAKES ALL.
- YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO ENCOUNTER.
- LET'S GO! LET'S GO! LET'S GO! OH, HEY, HEY, HEY! - WOW.
- * MONEY OWNS THIS TOWN * MONEY OWNS THIS TOWN YEAH YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT MONEY OWNS THIS TOWN - SOLD! - TODAY, WE'RE IN RIVERSIDE, CALIFORNIA, A CITY RICH IN HISTORICAL SPANISH CULTURE.
- SO WHAT WE'RE LOOKING FOR IS ANTIQUES, THINGS THAT HAVE BEEN PASSED DOWN FROM GRANDMA OR GRANDPA.
- THIS COULD BE A GOOD FACILITY FOR COMMERCIAL UNITS.
- WE HAD A GREAT WEEK AT THE SHOP.
WE'VE GOT PLENTY OF MONEY FOR THE AUCTION TODAY.
IF I SEE SOMETHING I LIKE, I'M GONNA GET IT.
- IT'S BEEN NICE TO HAVE FINALLY MADE SOME MONEY, BUT I REALLY HAVE TO MAKE SURE THAT JARROD DOESN'T SPEND IT ALL ON ONE OF HIS "FEELINGS.
" - I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT ANYBODY.
I'M NOT EVEN WORRIED ABOUT THESE TWO GUYS.
I'M JUST WAITING FOR A GOOD LOCKER TO COME UP.
THEN WE'LL SEE WHO'S GONNA WORRY.
YOU KNOW, I'M A LITTLE WORRIED ABOUT HOW I FEEL TODAY.
I SPEND $10,000 A WEEK BUYING THESE THINGS.
- THAT'S 'CAUSE YOU MET ME.
ONE THING THAT I NOTICE ABOUT DARRELL, HE ALWAYS HAS AN EXCUSE OF WHY HE CAN'T BEAT ME AT THE AUCTIONS.
- TOP OF THE MORNING TO YOU.
THESE OTHER GUYS, I'M NOT SURE THEY KNOW REALLY WHAT TO MAKE OF ME.
I DON'T KNOW IF I'LL EVER BE ACCEPTED INTO THIS MIGHTY EXCLUSIVE CLUB, BUT I'M WORKING ON IT.
- ALL RIGHT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME TO THE AUCTION SALE TODAY.
BEFORE YOU GO THROUGH THESE GATES, YOU NEED TO KNOW THE RULES OF THE STORAGE AUCTION.
THESE SALES ARE ALL CASH AND FINAL.
WE'RE GONNA REMOVE THE LOCK, OPEN THE DOOR.
WE'RE GONNA GIVE YOU FIVE MINUTES TO TAKE A LOOK AROUND.
YOU CAN'T GO INSIDE THE UNIT.
WE'RE GONNA SELL IT TO WHOEVER GOT THE MOST CASH IN THEIR POCKET TODAY, AND IF YOU'RE READY TO GO, I'M READY TO GO.
ARE YOU READY TO GO? all: YEAH! - THEN LET'S GO! ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
HERE WE GO.
HERE WE GO.
- IT'S A 10x10, FOLKS.
- BRANDI HAS A HARD TIME SEEING THE POTENTIAL.
ALL SHE SEES IS THE TRASH.
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU CAN SEE.
IT'S WHAT YOU CAN'T SEE.
IT ONLY TAKES ONE GOOD ITEM.
- AW, MAN.
AW, MAN.
AW, MAN.
- THERE'S JUST TOO MANY BOXES FILLED WITH TRASH FOR ME TO BID ON THIS UNIT.
- THIS ONE WILL BE INTERESTING.
I'M GONNA JUMP INTO THIS ONE, JUST BECAUSE THIS GUY LOOKED AS IF HE'S A COLLECTOR.
AT FIRST GLANCE, IT JUST LOOKED LIKE A BUNCH OF BOXES.
BUT THEN UPON CLOSER INSPECTION, THEY WERE MARKED.
"FRAGILE.
ELVIS STUFF.
" THESE ARE WORTH SOMETHING.
- ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
NUMBER 20.
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA PAY? SAY.
HOW MUCH MONEY? WHERE? [indistinct rapid speech.]
- YEAH.
- NOW 200.
ARE YOU 200? [indistinct rapid speech.]
- BARRY IS ALL FIRED UP RIGHT NOW, BUT THE OLD MAN'S GONNA HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME IF HE THINKS HE'S GETTING THIS UNIT.
YEAH.
- I GOT 250 HERE.
BARRY, YOU'RE AT 300.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
- IF JARROD WANTS THIS UNIT, HE'S GONNA HAVE TO GET HIS BALLS OUT OF BRANDI'S PURSE.
- YEP.
- WANT TO BID 400, BARRY? [indistinct rapid speech.]
- I DON'T WANT TO PAY $425 TO HAVE TO HAUL AWAY A BUNCH OF GARBAGE.
- 425 THERE.
I GOT 450 THERE.
- YEAH.
- YOU WANT TO BID 500, BARRY? THANK YOU.
I GOT 500 BUCKS.
LAST AND FINAL CALL AT 525.
- YEAH.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
BARRY, I GOT JARROD AT 525.
- HIT HIM AGAIN.
IF I'M NOT GONNA BID ON THIS UNIT, I'M AT LEAST GONNA HAVE SOME FUN WITH THESE GUYS.
- 575 GOING ONCE.
- YEAH.
- 575.
- HIT HIM AGAIN.
- THIS IS BULL[bleep.]
.
I'VE GOT ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH WITHOUT DAVE EGGING JARROD ON.
- GOT 600 BUCKS.
AT 600 BUCKS.
I GOT 600 BUCKS.
- I'M PRETTY SURE I CAN'T GO MUCH HIGHER BEFORE BRANDI SMACKS ME.
- 600 BUCKS.
LAST AND FINAL CALL AT 625 BUCKS OR NOT.
SOLD IT TO BARRY.
YOU GOT IT FOR 600 BIG BUCKS.
THANK YOU.
THANKS.
- JARROD BID ME UP WITH IT, BUT I WON THE UNIT ANYWAY AND I'M HAPPY.
- BARRY, YOU GOT IT FOR 600.
THANK YOU.
- CONGRATULATIONS, BARRY.
- THIS IS THE REASON THAT I'M HERE.
OTHERWISE, JARROD WOULD HAVE SPENT OUR RENT MONEY TO PAY FOR THAT UNIT.
- ALL RIGHT, BOYS AND GIRLS, YOU WANT TO BUY SOME UNITS? LET'S GO.
- GET A GOOD LOOK FROM THE DOOR.
EVERYTHING MUST GO.
YOU CANNOT LEAVE ANYTHING BEHIND.
- SOMETHING KOOKY IN THERE, UM, BUT IT'S NOT MUCH--NOTHING I CAN REALLY DO MUCH WITH.
THIS LOOKS TO ME LIKE A FAILED ART SCHOOL PROJECT.
- THE REST IS TRASH.
YEAH, SHE'S THE ONLY PIECE, BUT IT'S NOT WORTH HAULING ALL THIS TRASH.
THAT MANNEQUIN'S COOL, BUT I'M NOT AN ART DEALER AND THAT'S NOT SOMETHING I CAN SELL IN MY STORE.
- DUDE, IT'S GOT A TELEPHONE ON IT TOO.
- TWO YEARS AGO, I SOLD ONE JUST LIKE THIS.
THIS MANNEQUIN LOOKING TELEPHONE FOR $1,500.
YOU KNOW, IT'S KIND OF LIKE A '60s STAND-UP PHONE.
I SMELL DAVE BEHIND ME.
SO I GOT TO MAKE HIM THINK I'M NOT EVEN INTERESTED.
YOU KNOW, I'D GO 100 BUCKS JUST ON THE MANNEQUIN, BUT, UH, I DON'T KNOW.
WE'LL SEE.
I HOPE DAVE TAKES THE BAIT, BECAUSE THE LESS I GET THIS LOCKER FOR, THE MORE MONEY I'M GONNA MAKE.
- I GUESS IF DARRELL'S GONNA BE 100, I'M GONNA HAVE TO BE 110.
THERE'S SOME MISCELLANEOUS BLANKETS.
THE MANNEQUIN'S KIND OF COOL.
AGAIN, THERE'S NOT MUCH IN HERE.
- ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA PAY? SAY IT.
HOW ABOUT I GO--WHERE? GIVE ME 25.
WANT TO BID 25 BUCKS? [indistinct rapid speech.]
- YOU KNOW, I MIGHT BUY THIS ROOM JUST TO PISS DARRELL OFF.
- I GOT 25 HERE AND A 35 WHERE? WANT TO BID MORE? AND 55 WHERE? I GOT 45 THERE AND 55.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
AT 75 NOW.
I'VE GOT 65.
- DAVE JUST LIKES TO HEAR HIMSELF BID.
HE DOESN'T EVEN WANT THIS LOCKER.
- [indistinct rapid speech.]
- IF I WANT IT, I'LL BUY IT.
IF NOT, YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR IT.
- [indistinct rapid speech.]
- YEAH! - 105.
115.
- DAVE THINKS I'M ONLY GOING TO GO UP TO $100, BUT I CAN GO TO $1,000 AND STILL MAKE A PROFIT ON THIS PHONE.
- 125.
135.
- YEAH! - 135.
135.
150.
- YEAH! - NOW 200.
ARE YOU 200? BID 200 WHERE? I GOT 175.
WANT TO BID 200? LAST BID OF 225 GOING ONCE.
I'VE GOT 200.
- IS THAT DARRELL BIDDING? - IT IS.
- YEAH! - 225.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
- NO BREAK NOW.
- WANT TO BID 250? I'VE GOT 225.
WANT TO BID 250? GOING TWICE.
- $250 FOR THAT MANNEQUIN? THERE YOU GO, DARRELL.
IT'S A PRETTY GOOD DEAL SINCE IT'S CHEAPER THAN A MAIL-ORDER BRIDE.
- GOING TWICE.
LAST AND FINAL CALL AT 275.
GUESS WHAT, DARRELL.
YOU BOUGHT IT FOR 250 BIG BUCKS.
THANK YOU.
- YEAH, BABY! DAVE JUST DOESN'T HAVE A CLUE TO WHAT HE MISSED ON THIS ONE.
BRANDON AND I JUST WON A LOCKER WITH AN ANTIQUE MANNEQUIN IN IT WITH A TELEPHONE ATTACHED.
THIS IS THE WOW FACTOR.
THIS IS COOL.
- IS IT PLASTIC OR WHAT IS IT? - OH, YEAH, IT'S PLASTIC.
EVERY TIME I BUY A LOCKER, DAVE SNOOPS AROUND AND WANTS TO TAKE A PEEK.
- WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING AT IS A CUSTOM NORDSTROM'S PROMOTIONAL PHONE THAT THEY PUT OUT ON THE FLOORS.
- CORRECT.
RIGHT.
- THEY'RE WORTH ABOUT 2,000 IN WORSE CONDITION THAN THAT.
- WELL, GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE.
- DAVE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT.
HE DOESN'T THINK THIS PHONE IS WORTH ANYTHING, BUT I KNOW IT'S WORTH THOUSANDS.
- ALL RIGHT.
WE'RE OFF TO SEE THE NEXT UNIT.
LET'S GO! - LOT OF PAINT IN THERE.
MY HANDYMAN WOULD LOVE THIS UNIT, BUT I'D HAVE TO DRAIN MY POOL TO STORE ALL THIS PAINT.
- THIS CONTRACTOR'S UNIT HAS A LOT OF ITEMS THAT WOULD BE GOOD FOR A THRIFT STORE SO JARROD AND I HAVE DECIDED TO GO UP TO 700 ON THIS ONE.
- YOU KNOW, I SEE A LOT OF ITEMS THAT WOULD SELL GOOD IN A THRIFT STORE, BUT NOTHING I'D WANT TO HAUL TO THE SWAP MEET.
- SEEN IT.
WE'VE SEEN IT.
- THIS IS KIND OF AN INTERESTING ROOM, SO I'M DEFINITELY GONNA BID ON THIS UNIT HERE.
- ALL RIGHTY, HERE WE GO.
AND I GOT 100 RIGHT THERE.
NOW 200 WHERE? I GOT A 100.
NOW 200.
WANT TO BID 300 RIGHT THERE? - 500! - HOW MUCH? - 500.
THEN 600.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
I'VE GOT 600 BUCKS.
WANT TO BID 650? GOING ONCE.
I'VE GOT 600.
LAST AND FINAL CALL AT 650-- - YEAH! - ARE YOU 700? [indistinct rapid speech.]
AND LAST AND FINAL CALL AT 700 GOING ONCE.
AND AT BID 650 GOING TWICE.
- JARROD, WE AGREED ON 700.
YOU'RE STOPPING AT 600.
- SOLD IT TO A DANGER DAVE.
YOU GOT 650 BIG BUCKS.
- I KNEW JARROD THE POOPER SCOOPER COULDN'T LAST LONGER THAN 500 BUCKS.
- DAVE, WINNER.
- NORMALLY I WOULDN'T BACK DOWN, BUT I CAN'T REMEMBER IF ME AND BRANDI SAID 600 OR 700.
HAVING A CAP ON IT JUST THROWS ME OFF.
- CLOSE IT DOWN.
HERE WE GO.
WE'RE GONNA GO THIS WAY.
- YOU KNOW, I THINK I'M JUST GONNA HANG OUT HERE.
I WANT YOU TO GO OUT THERE AND HANDLE IT.
I'M JUST NOT FEELING GOOD AT ALL, BRANDON.
- ALL RIGHT.
- DON'T LOSE IT.
THAT'S YOUR INHERITANCE, KID.
YOU KNOW, THANKFULLY I'VE GOT MY SON BRANDON TODAY.
I'M GONNA SEND HIM OUT.
KNOCK 'EM DEAD, DUDE.
- ALL RIGHT, BRO.
- ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THIS ONE.
- LET'S DO IT, FOLKS.
- YEAH! - [whistles.]
- JUST TAKE 1 MINUTES, - THIS IS-- - THESE JANITORIAL ITEMS, THEY'RE DEFINITELY WORTH MONEY, BUT THEY'RE NOT GONNA HELP ME STOCK THE SHELVES IN MY THRIFT STORE, SO I'M GONNA HAVE TO PASS.
- JARROD'S RIGHT.
DID I JUST SAY THAT? YOU KNOW, I THINK JARROD AND I ARE GETTING MORE AND MORE IN SYNC.
IT'S GETTING KIND OF SCARY.
- IT CERTAINLY LOOKS LIKE IT'S A FULLY-STUFFED LOCKER.
- THERE'S A LOT OF GUYS AROUND HERE THAT COULD TURN THAT INTO CASH.
- YEAH.
- GOOD LUCK, BARRY.
- THANKS.
I'M NOT GONNA BE BIDDING ON IT, BUT THANKS FOR THE GOOD LUCK.
- NO PROBLEM.
- LOOKS LIKE THEY WERE RUNNING SOME KIND OF CLEANING BUSINESS OR, YOU KNOW, SOMETHING FOR A HOTEL AND THEN THEY GOT A BUNCH OF OFFICE CHAIRS AND STUFF IN HERE.
- I SEE CLEANING EQUIPMENT IN HERE, BUT I ALSO SEE A COPIER AND SOME OFFICE SUPPLIES.
I CAN SELL THIS ROOM IN A HEARTBEAT.
[speaking Spanish.]
- HE'S ACTUALLY SPEAKING SPANISH RIGHT NOW, NOT UNDERSTANDING THAT I SPEAK SPANISH.
AND IT SOUNDS LIKE HE'S TELLING HIS GUY TO GET HIS TRUCKS READY.
IT LOOKS LIKE HE WANTS TO BUY THIS ONE.
CLEARLY SOMETHING'S GOING ON HERE.
DAVE REALLY LIKES THIS UNIT.
I NEED TO TEXT MY DAD.
- ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
BIG OL' NICE 10x10 UNIT.
STARTING BID AT 10.
HOW ABOUT 20? WHERE? WANT TO BID 500? I GOT 300 RIGHT THERE.
HOW ABOUT 350? WHERE? I GOT 350 RIGHT THERE.
[cell phone chimes.]
- BRANDON CAN RUN HIS OWN SHOW.
HE'S PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF IT, BUT THERE MUST BE SOMETHING REALLY GOOD FOR HIM TO TEXT ME AND SAY, "DAD, GET OUT HERE.
" - YEAH! - 850.
WANT TO BID 900 NOW? ARE YOU 900 THERE? I'VE GOT 900.
[indistinct rapid speech.]
- ISN'T THIS CUTE? KID THINKS HE CAN SNEAK IN ON THE END AND GET THIS ONE FROM ME? THIS IS GONNA BE FUN.
YEAH! - [indistinct rapid speech.]
- I GOT TO KEEP THE BIDDING GOING JUST LONG ENOUGH TO WHERE DAVE DOESN'T GET THIS LOCKER AND MY DAD CAN COME OVER AND CHECK IT OUT.
- 1,200 BUCKS GOING ONCE.
I'VE GOT 1,200 BUCKS.
I'VE GOT 1,200 BUCKS.
GOT A BID 1,200.
LAST AND FINAL CALL.
- YEAH! THAT BID BOUGHT ME A COUPLE MORE SECONDS TO LOOK AT THIS LOCKER.
- WHO'S BIDDING? - I'VE GOT 1,250.
- YEAH! - YOU KNOW, THERE'S DEFINITELY $1,300 WORTH OF EQUIPMENT IN THERE AND MAYBE MORE.
I JUST CAN'T TRUST MY GUT RIGHT NOW.
LOOKS LIKE DAVE WINS THIS ROUND.
- DARRELL? - LET HIM HAVE IT.
- I'VE GOT 1,300 BUCKS.
- WAS THAT, LIKE, A $100 KISS? USUALLY YOU GET A HAPPY ENDING WITH THAT EXTRA 100.
- 1,350 GOING ONCE, TWICE.
WANT TO BID 1,350 OR NOT? SOLD IT TO A DAVE.
YOU GOT IT FOR 1,300 BIG BUCKS.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
- DARRELL SHOWS UP AND COSTS ME AN EXTRA $100, BUT IF I'M RIGHT, I'LL DOUBLE MY INVESTMENT.
I'LL MAKE THAT DEAL ALL DAY LONG.
- YEAH, FRIEND.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THAT'S IT.
DAVE, YOU'RE IN.
- BRANDI AND I GOT OFF TO A ROUGH START TODAY.
I TRIED TO BE THE BIGGER MAN AND DO THINGS HER WAY.
YEAH, WE SAVED A LITTLE BIT OF MONEY, BUT NOW WE'RE GOING HOME EMPTY-HANDED.
HOW'S THAT WORKING FOR YOU, BRANDI? - I WON THIS UNIT FOR 600.
THIS UNIT OBVIOUSLY BELONGED TO A COLLECTOR AND THAT'S RIGHT UP MY ALLEY.
THE BOX THAT SAYS, "ELVIS STUFF," I'M NOT EXACTLY EXPECTING TO FIND ORIGINAL SUN RECORD RECORDINGS.
ELVIS STUFF.
- WHAT'S UP, BARRY? NEVER SEEN YOU MOVE SO MUCH.
AFTER THE AUCTION, I BUMP INTO BARRY.
- LOOK AT THIS.
- YOU ASK ME, HE'S GONNA BE MAKING A FEW RUNS TO THE DUMP.
THANK GOD I DIDN'T BUY THIS PILE OF [bleep.]
.
NOW SEE, BARRY, WOULDN'T YOU HAVE RATHER BOUGHT A MANNEQUIN PHONE? - NO.
NO.
- NO WORK.
NO LABOR.
- ACTUALLY, I'M HAPPIER WITH MY PURCHASE.
- THIS LOCKER'S FULL OF TRASH.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH FOR THE DAY.
I'M GOING HOME TO RECOVER.
- YOU DON'T WANT TO HELP ME UNEARTH STUFF THAT WAS FROM THE KING? - NO.
- I DON'T REALLY CARE WHAT DARRELL THINKS.
MY GUT TELLS ME THERE'S SOMETHING SPECIAL IN HERE.
THERE'S GOT TO BE SOME OTHER PIECES TO THIS.
I DON'T KNOW IF IT WAS IN USE OR NOT, BUT THIS IS FOR MAKING YOUR OWN BOOZE.
I FIND THIS OLD PIECE OF COPPER, WHICH IS PART OF AN OLD MOONSHINE STILL.
I THINK THAT THIS STILL IS-- I THINK IT'S COMPLETE.
IF ALL THE PIECES ARE HERE AND I'M RIGHT, THIS COULD BE WORTH A LOT OF MONEY.
I FIND AN ANTIQUE STILL IN A LOCKER, WHICH I WON FOR $600, AND NOW I'M ON MY WAY TO GET IT APPRAISED.
YOU'D THINK I'D HAVE TO GO TO WEST VIRGINIA TO GET SOMETHING LIKE THIS APPRAISED.
BUT BELIEVE ME, LOS ANGELES HAS A FEW HILLBILLIES OF ITS OWN.
- LOOK WHAT THE CAT'S DRUG IN.
- NOT MANY PEOPLE COLLECT THESE THINGS, BUT LUCKILY, KEITH FLETCHER, A FRIEND OF MINE, HAS A VAST KNOWLEDGE OF 'EM.
AND HE REALLY HAS THE LAST WORD ON THEIR VALUE.
I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE THE EXPERTS.
AND, UH, I GOT IT IN PIECES AND I'M NOT EVEN SURE IF I GOT ALL THE PIECES.
- YEAH, YOU GOT 'EM ALL.
- YOU GOT SOMETHING GOOD.
- IT'S ABOUT A GALLON, GALLON AND A HALF COPPER POT STILL.
THIS RIGHT HERE IS PRETTY RARE.
THAT'S WHAT IS KNOWN AS A DOUBLER OR A THUMP KEG.
YOU VERY SELDOM EVER FIND THAT WITH A STILL.
WHAT YOU DO, YOU PUT YOUR MASH IN HERE.
CORNMEAL, YEAST, AND SUGAR.
- THESE GUYS ARE THE MCCOY.
THEY'RE SCHOOLING ME LIKE THEY'RE GONNA HAVE ME MAKING MOONSHINE TONIGHT.
- THAT VAPOR WILL COME UP IN THIS STILL CAP, OUT THE CAP ARM, BACK DOWN THROUGH THIS THUMP KEG OR DOUBLER, OVER TO YOUR WORM.
- WHAT IS SOMETHING LIKE THIS WORTH? - IT'S WORTH ABOUT TEN YEARS IN THE PEN.
- NO, I'M NOT GONNA MAKE MOONSHINE.
- OH, OH.
- I MEAN, WHAT IS THE STILL WORTH? - THIS STILL RIGHT HERE-- [groans.]
OH, I'M GUESSING I WOULD SAY EIGHT OR NINE.
- EIGHT OR NINE GRAND? - NO, EIGHT OR NINE LITTLE ONES.
- 800 OR 900? - YEAH, THAT'S ABOUT ALL IT'S WORTH.
- IF YOU'RE LUCKY.
- [bleep.]
.
I THOUGHT I WAS SITTING ON A GOLD MINE.
WELL, YOU KIND OF BURST MY BUBBLE.
I MEAN, IT WAS GOOD TO SEE YOU GUYS.
BUT I TELL YOU WHAT.
I BLEW IT THIS TIME.
I DID.
I MEAN, I KIND OF PRIDE MYSELF ON KNOWING.
FOR $600 I GOT TO HANG OUT WITH MY HILLBILLY BUDDIES, BUT IT DIDN'T EXACTLY GO HOW I THOUGHT IT WOULD.
MAYBE I'M NOT AS GOOD AS I THOUGHT.
- WE'RE BACK AT MY SHOP.
THE TRUCK'S JUST ARRIVED WITH THE JANITORIAL UNIT I BOUGHT FOR $1,300.
UM, THE JANITORIAL SERVICE BUSINESS IS A GOOD BUSINESS.
JANITORIAL COMPANIES ARE ALWAYS LOOKING TO SAVE MONEY ON EQUIPMENT.
I LOVE THIS UNIT.
I THINK I'M GONNA MAKE A GREAT PROFIT.
LET ME SEE THIS, GUYS.
YEAH, UNFORTUNATELY, IN STORAGE, YOU CAN'T ALWAYS SEE THE CONDITION OF STUFF.
THAT ONE'S BEEN NICKED UP.
SO THAT REALLY HURTS THE SALE.
THAT TURNS A $300 CHEST INTO ABOUT A $99 CHEST.
GENERALLY, ON THESE COPIERS, THEY KEEP ALL THE MAINTENANCE RECORDS.
THE SERVICE RECORDS HERE INDICATE THAT, UH, SO IT HAS ALMOST A MILLION COPIES ON IT.
THIS COPIER'S ABOUT $5,000 NEW.
UNFORTUNATELY, IT'S AT THE END OF ITS LIFE, SO IT'S NOT GONNA HAVE VERY MUCH VALUE AT ALL.
MY GUESS, IT'S PROBABLY WORTH IN THE CONDITION THAT IT'S IN.
ALL THESE ITEMS TOGETHER ARE GONNA MAKE US SOME MONEY, BUT I THINK WE'RE GONNA BE LUCKY JUST TO BREAK EVEN ON THIS UNIT.
- $1.
99.
- $.
99, $.
99.
- JUST A LOT OF $.
99s AND $1.
99s AND $5.
99s.
COME ON, GUYS.
GIVE ME SOMETHING GOOD.
GIVE ME SOMETHING GOOD.
I GOT THIS BIG MONSTER DEFEAT.
I'M NOT HAPPY ABOUT THE TURNOUT TODAY.
I'VE GOT A MASSIVE OVERHEAD.
I'VE GOT MULTIPLE EMPLOYEES TO PAY.
IT'S ALL ABOUT KEEPING MY HEAD ABOVE WATER.
- UH, WE'RE NOT GONNA MAKE ANY MONEY ON THAT UNIT.
- WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? - THE QUALITY OF THE MERCHANDISE WASN'T THAT GOOD.
- REALLY? - YEAH.
- DARRELL THE DUMMY AND MINI-D COST ME A COUPLE HUNDRED BUCKS ON THIS UNIT.
I'M GONNA MAKE DAMN SURE I GET BACK IN THEIR ASS ON THE NEXT ONE.
- I WON A LOCKER FOR $250 WITH A TELEPHONE MANNEQUIN IN IT AND NOW I'M TAKING IT TO MY PHONE SPECIALIST DAN GOLDING.
- THIS IS THE CROWN JEWEL OF MY COLLECTION.
THIS IS PROBABLY THE RAREST TELEPHONE IN THE WHOLE WORLD AND HERE IT IS IN MY COLLECTION.
- WOW.
LET ME JUST PUT MY HANDS ON IT.
OH, IT'S HEAVY.
- OKAY, NOW DON'T DROP HER OR I'LL HAVE TO SLUG YOU.
- NO, NO.
I DON'T WANT TO GET SLUGGED.
- YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS.
OKAY, THANKS.
ALL RIGHT.
ANYWAY.
- THAT MUST BE RARE.
THAT PHONE IS WORTH OVER $20,000.
AND DAN'S THE TYPE THAT DOESN'T LIKE TO SHARE HIS TOYS, SO I KNOW IT'S TIME TO GET DOWN TO BUSINESS.
- WOW.
I LIKE THE COLOR.
- YEAH.
- WE'RE GONNA SET IT DOWN OVER HERE.
- JUST RIGHT HERE? - YEAH, RIGHT THERE.
OKAY, THIS MODEL CAME OUT FROM THE BELL SYSTEM IN ABOUT 1979, SO IT IS A PART OF TELEPHONE COMMERCIAL ART HISTORY.
- I LIKE IT.
I THINK IT'S COOL.
BUT, YOU KNOW, I'M HERE TO SELL IT AND-- - WELL, I'D LIKE TO BUY IT, BUT THE TRUTH ABOUT THIS IS IT'S NOT IN THE SAME CATEGORY AS AN 1881 LONG-DISTANCE TRANSMITTER.
IT'S IN THE CATEGORY OF UNUSUAL.
SO I'M OFFERING YOU 1,000 BUCKS CASH FOR IT.
$100 BILLS.
- DAN'S A REAL SLICK NEGOTIATOR.
I'VE GOT TO BE CAREFUL, 'CAUSE IT'S REAL EASY FOR ME TO LOSE PROFIT AT THIS POINT IN THE GAME.
YOU KNOW, I CAME IN HERE WITH A TELEPHONE EXPECTATION OF 5,000, SO WE'RE A LITTLE WAYS AWAY BETWEEN 5,000 AND 1,000.
- SO THIS IS A REALLY GOOD ITEM.
HOW ABOUT 1,200? - LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT MORE SERIOUS, DAN, IF YOU THINK IT'S REALLY SOMETHING YOU WANT.
I'D GO 2,500 BUCKS ON IT.
HE'S NOT GETTING THIS FOR LESS THAN 2,000.
- 1,300.
- I DON'T KNOW, DAN.
I JUST THINK YOU CAN DO A LITTLE BIT BETTER THAN THAT.
- UM, I COULD PAY 1,500 CASH AND THAT'S THE MOST I COULD PAY FOR IT.
- HOW ABOUT IF WE FLIP A COIN FOR IT? - YOU'D WIN BOTH WAYS, 'CAUSE THAT'S WAY ABOVE WHAT I'M OFFERING.
- YEAH, NO, I THINK IF I CAN'T GET 2,000 OUT OF IT, I'M GONNA HOLD ON TO IT.
- WELL, UH OKAY, SO WE'LL DEAL FOR THE 2,000.
- THAT'S WHY I COME TO YOU, DAN.
- OKAY, THANK YOU.
- EVEN IF YOU HIT A GOOD LOCKER, THERE'S STILL PROFIT TO PROTECT AND THAT'S WHAT I DID HERE TODAY.
I MADE A $1,750 PROFIT.
I'M HAPPY.
narrator: THE WINNER OF THE RIVERSIDE AUCTION WAS DARRELL SHEETS, MAKING $1,750 ON HIS MANNEQUIN PHONE.
BARRY WEISS MADE A MODEST $400 FROM HIS DISHES AND MOONSHINE STILL.
FOR JARROD AND BRANDI, A PENNY SAVED WAS A PENNY EARNED.
THE SURPRISE UPSET GOES TO DAVE HESTER LOSING $400 FROM HIS OFFICE AND JANITORIAL UNITS.
AND DESPITE HIS MISSTEP - BARRY WEISS CHAIR.
- IT IS.
THAT'S A BARRY WEISS CHAIR RIGHT THERE.
- [laughs.]
- HAVE A SEAT.
- THAT'S GREAT.
- SIT DOWN, BARRY.
narrator: BARRY'S TENACITY HAS EARNED HIM RESPECT WITH THE STORAGE CLAN.
- JUST JUMP UP THERE LIKE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
- I'VE NEVER SEEN ONE THIS BIG.
- THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.

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