Teen Titans (2003) s03e01 Episode Script

Deception

[ALARM BLARING] [GRUNTING] Move it, slug-crunchers.
We're running out of time.
[GRUNTING] Whew! I could use a hand here.
CYBORG: How 'bout a foot? [CYBORG YELLS] Titans, go! [GROWLING] Three raids in one week? Man, this is seriously gettin' old.
The H.
I.
V.
E.
Academy's new leader must be up to something.
[GRUNTS] And wouldn't you like to know? Aah! Yes, we would.
Sweet.
This crud should be worth Ugh! Hey! [ROARS] [SCREAMING] [MOANING] Huh? Aah! Oh, you did not just do what I think you did! Check it out: the world's dumbest magnet.
[LAUGHS] [JINX SCREAMS] Junk it.
Let's blow this place.
Yo, nobody pulls a science fair on me and gets away with it.
ROBIN: It's okay, Cyborg.
We'll see them again.
Sooner than they think.
[BEEPING] # When there's trouble You know who to call # # Teen Titans! # # From their tower They can see it all # # Teen Titans! # # When there's evil On the attack # # You can rest knowing They got your back # # 'Cause when the world Needs heroes on patrol # # Teen Titans go! # # With their superpowers They unite # # Teen Titans! # # Never met a villain That they liked # # Teen Titans! # # They've got the bad guys On the run # # They never stop till Their job gets done # # 'Cause when the world Is losing all control # # Teen Titans go! # # One, two, three, four, go! # Teen Titans! [BEEPING] BEAST BOY: Tracking device.
Very sneaky.
Looks like the H.
I.
V.
E.
's secret headquarters isn't so secret anymore.
So, what are we waiting for? We need to know what they're planning first.
Otherwise, we could walk right into a trap.
Do I hear an undercover assignment comin' on? Lucky for you guys, I happen to be a master of disguise.
[GIBBERING] Yeah, a green mongoose is gonna blend right in.
Sorry, Beast Boy.
I was thinking of someone with a slightly better disguise.
Huh.
What are you gonna do? Dress Cyborg up like a washing machine? [SCREAMS] CYBORG: That isn't me.
That's my fully robotic replacement.
Not nearly as charming, but he can bench-press a bus.
Booyah! Aah! Aah! He still has a few bugs to work out.
No fair.
I may be all green, but he's half-metal.
How come he gets to go? Because I have a new toy.
[GASPS] A holographic generator! Dude, you look Unplugged.
Nice work.
If I didn't know better, I'd think you were just normal.
Uh thanks.
Aw, yeah, baby! Somebody's been workin' out.
[GRUNTING] Huh? Waah! Whoa! Hey! Ahem.
Star.
I didn't How long have you been standing there? Forgive me.
Your door was open.
Oh, it's cool.
Just checkin' out the old, unimproved me.
I forgot what it was like to have real hands.
Well almost real.
They are most convincing.
However, my preference is for the original version.
[CHUCKLES] This is the original version.
ROBIN: Cyborg.
It's time.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER] Eww.
Whew.
Okay.
Just play it cool, and you'll blend right in.
[CHATTER STOPS] [CHUCKLES, SNIFFS] Ah, sloppy joes.
Just like the mad scientist who created me used to make.
[CHATTER RESUMES] Whew.
MAMMOTH: You're in my seat.
Hey, newbie, this is our table.
What do you think you're doing here? He looks familiar.
JINX: Did you go to Darkway Prep? MAMMOTH: What's your name? GIZMO: Probably something lame.
Oh, let me guess.
Snot Man? No, wait.
Captain Nose-Picker? Do you even have any powers? I'm hungry.
Get lost.
Yeah, scum, take a hike.
[BEEPING] Aah! [GRUNTS] [ALL LAUGHING] [ALL LAUGHING] [GROWLS] [CYBORG ROARS] CYBORG: My name is Stone.
It looks like you need to find a new table.
[GIGGLES NERVOUSLY] Not bad.
Let's just see how he does in combat practice.
[BUZZER SOUNDS] [LOUD RUMBLING] Gamma maneuver.
Hold on.
I don't know that.
Then get out of the way.
Time to kick butt.
Aah! [MAMMOTH GROWLS] [GRUNTING] GIZMO: Ha! The newb is toast.
Hey, rocko, had enough? [LAUGHING] [LAUGHING] Quit fooling around.
The headmaster is watching.
[SCREAMS, GRUNTS] [ALL GRUNTING AND GROANING] [ROARS] [CRACKS KNUCKLES] [ALL GASP] [ROARS] [GROANING] [GROANING] GIZMO: We've gotta cross the finish line.
[BUZZER SOUNDS] Yes! Now, that's what I'm Zip it, grapple-brain.
HEADMASTER: You! Stone.
Sneaking into my school, destroying my drones, making my top students look like amateur pickpockets.
You must think you're very clever.
But you're not clever.
You're brilliant.
Well done, Mr.
Stone.
Well done.
Whew.
I see a bright future for you.
Heh, heh.
Thanks.
Uh great school you have here, Mr.
, uh Blood.
Brother Blood.
At your service.
And as for you three, failure will not be tolerated! You were already sent back after graduating once.
Fail me again, and I'll have you sent to your doom! Do I make myself clear? [IN UNISON] Yes, Brother.
Outstanding.
In a few days, I will unveil your class project, the culmination of all your hard work over the last few weeks.
And when it is unleashed, our foes will tremble in our wake.
Tremble! [ALL CHEERING] ALL: Brother Blood! Brother Blood! Brother Blood! Brother Blood! Brother Blood! Cyborg's communication relay has been deactivated.
Could be interference.
Let's just give him a minute.
BEAST BOY: Besides, who needs him? This Cyborg is way more fun.
[LAUGHING] Booyah! Any chance we could replace Beast Boy with a robot too? Cut it out.
I don't think Cyborg would appreciate CYBORG: Appreciate what? The fact that he's already the top butt-kicker in his class? Cyborg! [WHISTLING] Your infiltration is successful, yes? You bet.
Had a few close calls, though.
What did you learn? They're workin' on some kind of class project.
Sounds heavy, but no details yet.
Well, find out and get out.
The longer you're there, the more dangerous it gets.
Believe me, I don't plan on stickin' around.
GIZMO: Well, what do you know? It's the headmaster's scrum-buffin' pet.
JINX: Get him.
Don't bother trying to run.
MAMMOTH: You won't get far.
The whole school is in on it.
In on what? What do you think, pie-for-brains? Your initiation.
Ha, ha.
That's it? Don't laugh.
You have to eat the unicycle.
[GRUNTING] Huh? [ALL LAUGHING] [GRUNTING] We have ourselves a natural.
Take him to maximum.
[GRUNTING] GIZMO: Lunch is super today, and the mashed potatoes are dynamite.
[BOTH SNICKERING] [WHISTLING] [BOTH GASP] [BOTH GIGGLING] Hey! What are you slug faces laughing at? [ALL GUFFAWING] So that's why any good doomsday threat needs what? [WHINING] Mr.
Stone? Uh, effective misdirection? Correct.
Moving on Congratulations.
You're one of us.
But that doesn't mean we have to like you.
BEAST BOY: So the plumber says, "Just because I'm a talking aardvark, doesn't mean I can drive.
" [LAUGHS] Booyah! Booyah! Booyah! [LAUGHS] No word in four days.
That's it.
I'm calling him.
STARFIRE: Robin, please, we may endanger his mission.
RAVEN: Or we may save his life.
[KNOCKS HELMET] Something's not right here.
BEAST BOY: Tell me about it.
I can't figure out how to make this thing burp.
[BURPS] [LAUGHS] What? I'm trying to make him more realistic.
Cyborg, do you copy? Cyborg, come in.
This isn't a good time, guys.
We've got a theory of mayhem test tomorrow, and I'm gonna bomb.
Please tell me you're joking.
Yeah, uh, look, sorry I haven't checked in.
I've been learning their combat technique, weapons, armor, and we had a dance.
A dance? Cyborg, you're there to find out what the H.
I.
V.
E.
is planning, not learn to tango.
I know.
This hasn't exactly been a tea party, okay? I need a little more time.
Or maybe it's time we went on the offensive.
[COMPUTER BLEEPS] I'm in.
Good.
Just make it quick.
Okay.
I found the mainframe.
Whoa! I think I just found the class project.
They're building something called BROTHER BLOOD: An ion amplifier.
Cyborg, who's? Well, this is a surprise, Mr.
Stone.
Or should I say "Cyborg"? Relax.
I don't want to fight.
It's a remarkable weapon, really.
Compact, elegant, devastating in its power, but it's nothing compared to you.
What do you want from me? Oh, it's not what I want that matters.
It's what you want and what I can give you.
[HIGH-PITCHED RINGING] [GROANING] My hand.
I can feel it.
It's real.
No! Serve me, and I can make you what you once were.
I can give back your life.
I'll do anything you ask.
Good.
Then I think it's time for the other students to see our little class project.
Clear.
Beast Boy, hurry up.
[BEAST BOY GRUNTING] Next time Cyborg builds a robot, he better leave instructions.
Booyah! Booyah! [IN UNISON] Whew.
[BEEPING] I'm picking up Cyborg's signal directly below us.
[SCREAMING] Not good.
BROTHER BLOOD: The Teen Titans.
So nice to make your acquaintance.
I'd introduce you to my students, but I'm fairly certain you've already met.
Attack pattern, alpha.
No mercy.
No mercy! Ha! Ha! [GRUNTS] [YELLING] Hah! Aah! [YELLING] Cyborg, take it easy.
Come on.
Come on.
How do you make this thing? Oh.
Attack mode.
ROBOT: Teen Titans, go! # You can't hit me # # You can't hit me # MULTIPLE GIZMOS: # You can't hit me # # You can't hit me # Crud! [GROWLS] [GRUNTS] Enough, Cyborg.
It's time to drop the act.
This isn't an act.
[ROARING] [GRUNTS] [GROANING] [ROARS] [BEAST BOY YELLS, GRUNTS] ROBIN: Force field.
[YELLING] Booyah! Booyah this.
[ROARING] GIZMO: I knew it! The stinking gag bag is one of them.
BROTHER BLOOD: No.
He's one of us now.
And I'm ready to prove it.
I had a feeling you'd say that.
This will amplify your power by magnitudes unimagined.
Destroy them for me, and you'll have your reward.
Cyborg, no! Please.
Come on, buddy.
We're your friends.
Sorry, but I have new friends.
Psych! [GROWLS] A foolish choice, my friend.
Very foolish.
You could have been one of us.
I could have been a lot of things.
Raven, get us out of here.
I thought you would never ask.
Sorry I had to play rough with you guys, but when I found out what this could do, I had to make Blood trust me.
But if all those H.
I.
V.
E.
kids were brainwashed, why not you? Because half my brain is electronic.
He may have been able to fool the man, but he couldn't fool the machine.
Which means, next time we face him, we have our own secret weapon.
Goodbye, Stone.
For your thoughts I will pay six grubfars.
If that's your way of asking me if I'm okay, don't worry.
I'm fine.
I never got to finish high school because of this.
And when I was at the H.
I.
V.
E.
, for a while there I actually felt normal.
I did not know you before, so to me, you are normal.
BEAST BOY: Oh, Cyborg! You left the Titans.
That means you have to be initiated all over again.
ALL: Come on, Cyborg.
Oh, no.
I'm not wearing it.
You want me to do what? I'm not puttin' that on my head.
Uh-uh.
Ain't gonna happen.
I'm not doin' it! No! I said, no tights! # T-E-E-N # # T-I-T-A-N-S # # Teen Titans # # Let's go! # # T-E-E-N # # T-I-T-A-N-S # # Teen Titans # # Let's go! # # T-E-E-N # # T-I-T-A-N-S # # Teen Titans # # Let's go! #