The Deuce (2017) s02e03 Episode Script
Seven-Fifty
1 It's not like how it was when we started.
It's like a free world.
Free world.
(DISCO MUSIC PLAYING) I'm not doing this anymore.
How 'bout making something really special? MOBSTER: Heard about that mess the other night.
We already have an understanding with Mr.
Pipilo.
I'd ask out of that arrangement and possibly get into a new one.
GENE GOLDMAN: Do you have any idea what's coming down the pipe, Detective? You know who benefits? Cats like you.
LORI: I got nominated! The chance to meet and greet the whole industry, both coasts.
- I could arrange sit-downs.
- Absolutely.
Then you gotta hire me as your agent.
[JET AIRPLANE IDLING.]
You sure you want to bring all that? They lose the bags sometimes, y'know.
Yeah, well, that's why you gotta be prepared.
OK, Daddy.
You think I need this coat? It's gonna be warm in L.
A.
What about inside the plane? Is it cold? You've never flown before? Never had the occasion till now.
Why would I want to be all crammed up in a tin can for four hours? - It's seven hours.
- Seven?! Yeah.
Let me see the tickets.
See? We land at 1:00.
Yeah, and we leave at 9:00.
Four hours.
No, there's a time change.
We go back in time? - I don't play that shit.
- No, it's It's a different time zone.
Yeah, I knew that.
You think I'm ignorant? - Are you nervous about flying? - Me? Hell, no.
It's not dangerous.
Only, like, a few planes go down every year.
Anyway, we should get goin'.
Hold up.
Gotta think on this.
Think on what? The awards are tonight.
Yeah, but if we all crashed up in the Nebraska cornfields, then ain't nobody winning nothin' but Best Burnt-to-Shit Motherfuckers.
Don't be crazy.
Fuck it.
- We're stayin'.
- What?! Yeah.
You're too valuable an asset.
Harvey can get your award, or send some Injun bitch up there like Marlon Brando did.
C.
C.
, I have to go.
You know I have to go.
Bring back that gold for us.
You know I will, Daddy.
[JET AIRPLANE TAKING OFF.]
See her picture in a thousand places 'Cause she's this year's girl You think you all own Little pieces of this year's girl Forget your fancy manners Forget your English grammar 'Cause you don't really give a damn About this year's girl Ahh-ee-ahh Still you're hopin' that she's well-spoken 'Cause she's this year's girl You want her broken with her mouth wide open 'Cause she's this year's girl Those disco synthesizers Those daily tranquilizers Those body-building prizes Those bedroom alibis All this But no surprises For this year's girl All this But no surprises For this year's girl Hey! PAUL: No, don't give me that look.
Just hear me out.
You remember how you felt when you first got the Hi-Hat, right? Hell, I remember how you felt.
I saw you, I was there.
Yeah, it was a nice opportunity.
Come on.
You loved it.
Yeah, I loved it.
That's all we're asking for, an opportunity.
Twenty-thousand dollars.
We don't need the whole amount.
I've got seven in cash.
You kick in the rest, we can secure the lease.
Yeah, personally, it sounds like a great idea.
We have to see what Rudy says.
Yeah, about that.
We want to do this on our own.
- With my money.
- It's a promissory note.
You're gonna get paid back with interest.
And Rudy still gets his nut on the original bar, but this new one, it's ours.
[SIGHS.]
You know, I thought you were the smart one.
- OK.
- Yes! Thank you, man.
Thank you.
- Fucking love you.
- All right.
All right.
[ALL MOANING.]
WOLF: Get a shot of Kelly's ass, would ya? And cut.
- [MOANING STOPS.]
- Very nice.
Darlene, Kelly, you're done.
Jennifer, stick around.
Let's set up the camera for the D.
P.
MAN: You heard him, let's go.
D.
P.
's up, you guys.
D.
P.
That's Director of Photography, right? Head cameraman? Nah.
D.
P.
means "double penetration.
" Double penetration? So you fuck her twice? Not exactly.
So - He's talented.
- Who, Eric? He got you goin', huh? No.
I mean, he's a trained actor.
I saw him in a toothpaste commercial.
He does have a nice smile.
Nice tongue, too.
CARRIE: Your paychecks cleared.
Great scene.
Very hot.
Thank you, Carrie.
You have another scene coming up later? No.
Why? Just thought I saw it in the script.
You read the whole script? LARRY: So your dick touches his dick? Not on purpose, but if it happens, who cares? - That shit is fucked up.
- WOLF: Drew, we're ready for you.
Personally I'm into it.
GOLDMAN: The high crime rate continues to deter visitors.
But law enforcement is only one piece of a coordinated effort with zoning reform and sustained economic development.
What the fuck does this have to do with us? - No fuckin' clue.
- Nothing.
Our overall action plan comprises a series of immediate, intermediate, and long-term goals.
For instance, in the short term we are supporting legislation to prevent "hot bedding" Renting the same hotel room more than twice in 24 hours.
- That's never done.
- Right.
- Good luck.
- We're proposing a permanent city-wide ban on massage parlors, and we will more closely regulate the distribution of collateral promoting sex-related businesses.
A tourist or city resident should be able to walk through Times Square without being constantly propositioned with handbills.
- I'm sorry.
Hand what? - [COPS CHUCKLING.]
- Handbills? - Oh, hand bills.
- Oh, OK.
- [LAUGHTER.]
The Broadway Theater District has seen revenue growth of over 100% in the last four years.
I shouldn't have given up dance lessons.
You might have been good at that.
The Manhattan Plaza Housing Project has added 1,700 residential units to the neighborhood with 70% occupied by performing artists.
And the city has plans for a new convention center on 11th Avenue that will provide a southwest anchor.
[MEN SNICKERING.]
- GOLDMAN: What's wrong? - Sorry, Gene, it's stuck.
- Damnit.
- Excuse me, gentlemen.
It's the damn budget cuts.
- What happened? - I don't know.
It just stopped.
All right, so you want us to come back? - I'll be right with you.
- Maybe it's overheated.
There's 16 parlors now between 7th and 10th.
You can't take a piss on 42nd Street without hitting one.
Are we still makin' money here? Yeah, but we won't for long.
I sent Black Frankie over to one of the new places last night with a $10 bill, he got a hand job and came back with change.
What, you didn't tip? Seven-fifty.
It was all right.
Seven-fifty? How the fuck are they making a profit? They ain't.
They're just trying to put us under.
It's what you call a loss leader.
Yeah, but here's the thing.
Tell him.
Wasn't no fuzz on that peach.
- [WHISTLES.]
- What, high school girls? More like junior high.
Fuckin' Hodas is out of control.
His people may be scumbags, but even they don't go for this shit.
Rudy, are you ready to come up? Yeah, sweetheart.
You boys hold the line.
No slashin' prices.
I'll get with Carmine over this.
Rudy.
One more thing.
You gonna join me, Vince? 'Cause believe me, I don't need your help.
Uh, it's about Paul.
He wants to open another night spot.
What, another fag joint? It's more like a supper club.
Piano player, top shelf liquor, dining room, good menu.
It's in a townhouse.
An upscale joint, huh? That's not a bad idea.
How much does he need? He doesn't need anything.
Then why are we having this conversation? Look, Paul's very grateful for what you did for him, he doesn't mean any disrespect, he just wants his own thing, free and clear.
Free and clear? So Paul invokes my name to shake the Horse, and now he wants to fly away from the nest? You got a hand in this bullshit? Yeah.
I'm staking him a few grand.
Just a loan to get him off the ground.
Figured he deserved it.
He's done good for us.
All right.
I'll get him in line, all right? No.
No, it's all right.
You sure? Yeah, I'm sure.
Now can I go get my fuckin' rocks off already? It's rude to keep a lady waiting.
ALSTON: Every four years, another action plan.
Another bunch of suits gettin' paid to write reports and make pie charts.
How many times have we seen this movie? Urban renewal is a reliable formula.
Plays well with the voters.
Well, it may play well with voters, but it doesn't play in a room full of cops.
We're catchin' dead bodies most nights of the week, and he's talking about box office receipts for Annie and A Chorus Line.
[LAUGHS.]
Cut Goldman a little slack.
He's a policy guy.
They tend to lack social skills.
I'm not sure about the policy, either.
Koch was pitching the idea of a combat zone during the campaign.
What the hell happened then? The red-light district? No, that's dead.
They don't want it moved anymore, they want it gone.
- You know why? - Somebody in Public Morals got morals? 'Cause every block in Midtown that's occupied by cash businesses that don't report their actual income is a million dollars in lost tax revenue.
It's not morals, it's money.
Don't underestimate this group of do-gooders.
Goldman and his kind, they bought into the Lindsay bullshit the minute they stepped out of law school.
These Midtown enforcement people are idealists, and we might be shuffling people around as a result.
Sir? I'm not so sure Officer Handbills is the best kind of person for Vice Squad in the Koch era.
I could put your name out there if you're interested.
I spent years trying to get out of that cesspool.
So, no thank you.
I'm happy where I am.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Hmm.
[SNIFFS.]
[TRAFFIC NOISES.]
Oh If the Rangers manage to limp into the playoffs, who would you want in the net? Thomas or Davidson? What the fuck do I know from hockey, man? I'm from West Baltimore.
BOBBY: Evenin', ladies.
Hey, Bobby.
Hey, Marilys.
Big night for you ahead.
ANITA: I'm late for work! DANNY: You don't need this shit.
You shouldn't be working here with all these fucking creeps.
It's my job.
And I do need this shit, because I got a kid back home that needs Pampers.
You gonna support me, Danny? Anita, I ain't fuckin' around here.
Flanagan, she's clockin' in.
This ain't your fuckin' business, Bobby.
It is my business if you're hassling my employees.
Watch it, man.
I make the right phone call, and the rent goes up.
Can we leave the soap opera out on the sidewalk? Please? Only because you said please.
DANNY: Come on, let's go.
Come on.
[JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING.]
Protestors [CHANTING.]
: You sinners are going to hell! You sinners are going to hell! You sinners are going to hell! You sinners are going to hell! REPORTER: Hey, Becky! Move away! Move away! - [CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING.]
- [CHANTING CONTINUES.]
Sorry.
Excuse me.
REPORTER: Sweetheart! Right here! [REPORTERS CLAMORING.]
- Shana! Shana! - Over here! [CHATTER.]
- LORI: Hey.
- CANDY: Hey! - It's our Best Supporting Actress.
- Nominee.
- Excited? - I'm very excited.
Where's your man? Oh, C.
C.
decided not to come.
No kiddin'.
I thought he'd want to be here to shake down Dave Friedman and the entire AFAA board for fifty bucks and an extra shrimp cocktail.
Turns out he doesn't like airplanes.
"Fear of Flying"? That's appropriate.
It's a book.
Now listen, after the ceremony, make sure you schmooze those money guys you're after.
Harold Lime, Nathan Malone, Bill Osco That's the plan.
The thing is, most people think of prostitutes as a cancer, and with all the police harassment, a lot of the women think of themselves that way, too.
OK, but we've had outraged people for a while now.
What's happening on the West Coast that's different? It started with outrage, and that was cool, but what it led to out there was organizing.
You make relationships with these women, and it opens a door to something bigger.
The goal is decriminalization.
Meantime, we help however we can.
Medical services, free legal aid.
Even just making them feel like they're not alone out there makes a difference.
That's what Arlene Carmen was doing when she got arrested in January.
I read about that.
"Loitering for purposes of prostitution.
" Dave's working with the NYCLU on her lawsuit.
That's why he came out east with us.
How are you arguing it? The law is unconstitutional.
Violates the Fourth and Fourteenth Amendments.
And Arlene's right back out there.
Do you wanna meet her? She's takin' the van out tonight.
I could meet you after I close up.
Sure.
No boys allowed, but I'll tell Arlene that the two of you are in.
DAVE: Don't forget to bundle up.
- Bye, Dave.
- Bye.
You OK? Mm-hmm.
Is C.
C.
still around? Yeah.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING.]
ANNOUNCER: Bobby Astyr, for "Barbara Broadcast.
" - Who are you? - I'm Harvey the Wallbanger.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, HOOTING.]
HARVEY: Can you believe how much money's here? How much money these people had to spend on these outfits? I mean, how can they afford it? Guess you were gettin' old.
What the hell? They're not showing any any of the good stuff.
Come on, look at these clips.
No titties? No titties, no twats, no fuckin'.
What, did we walk into the wrong banquet hall? I saw more cock in the men's room.
It's still a business doing pleasure with you.
- [APPLAUSE.]
- Whoo whoo! Oh, yeah, yeah, sure, he can act, but the real talent is keeping your dick hard for 14 hours.
Huh? No! We should be saluting Jamie Gillis's helmeted soldier! What if his parents are here? Think they want to see his cock up on the screen? I'm sayin' we don't need to be embarrassed by what we do.
We should be proud of our perversions.
ANNOUNCER: for "Baby Face.
" [MUSIC PLAYING.]
I read he got paralyzed from the waist down.
Know what I mean? Like, no fire down below.
All because of some dirty fuckin' pictures.
And now he's like I get it, Frankie.
It's a tragedy.
He's lucky he fuckin' survived.
He probably wishes he didn't.
Don't believe the heathens, Vince.
There is a God, and he's a twisted fuck.
- Know what I mean? - Amen.
Ella.
Hey, George.
You want some Metaxa? I don't want no fuckin' pioto.
OK.
You see that gamoto in the blue jacket? - VINCENT: Yeah.
- He's undercutting me.
Does he kick back to you like I do? I don't even know him.
You don't know him.
Then we have a fucking problem.
All right, relax.
I'll handle it.
Mike! Mike! Time to enforce the house rules.
Whoa.
"Death Wish II" over here.
The sequel.
[HORNS HONKING.]
- Hey.
- Hey.
- You ready? - Yeah.
Let's do it.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Abby.
[DISCO MUSIC PLAYING.]
- Excuse me, my man.
- Hey, brother.
- You lookin' to cop? - You're outta here.
What are you talkin' about? Talkin' about you peddlin' your shit in another man's establishment.
Take it outside.
What about that sheep fucker? He has an arrangement.
You don't.
I paid for this beer.
I'm gonna finish it.
[GRUNTS.]
MIKE: You wanna dance? Huh? DEALER: Get off me! Come on, man! [YELLING.]
[DEALER COUGHING, GROANING.]
It's a parody of "Westworld," except instead of cowboys and Indians, it's sex robots.
I mean, it is brilliant.
I also really loved [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
WOMAN: I read the script Hey.
Is that somebody? It's Jackie Gayle.
He was on Merv Griffin.
He opened for Sinatra in Vegas, too.
You know him? Met him a few times.
You're Lori Madison.
You're nominated for "Family Head"? Mm-hmm.
That's the one.
I actually thought you were better in "Still Just A Girl.
" That scene where you're recovering from amnesia with all those competing emotions? I went to Theater of Arts for years and I can't pull that off.
- What's your method? - Well, for that, I just thought about when I used to sleep at my grandparents' house, and when I'd wake up I'd sort of know where I was but at the same time I'd also sort of not know where I was, so it was like familiar but also not familiar at the same time.
Does that make sense? Yeah, it does.
It's a great scene.
Hmm.
What'd you say your name was again? Greg Taylor.
So you're an actor.
Uh, I've done some acting, but now I'm mostly a talent scout.
If you ever think about moving to L.
A.
, you should look me up.
As great as you are, you belong out west.
It's happening, right here.
ANNOUNCER: And the winner is Lori Madison! I think you're up.
- Shit.
- [APPLAUSE.]
- Go get it! - For God's sake, you're my father! Whoo! Yes! Yes, yes, yes! [CHEERING, APPLAUSE.]
We had the health center, but then we realized That most of the women can't come to you.
If we really wanted to reach them, we needed to meet them where they are.
Do you help them get out of the life? We would if they asked, but most of them don't.
We're not out here trying to save souls.
Their souls don't need saving.
And when they locked you up, did they at least let you order off a menu? No.
All I got was a bologna sandwich.
[DOOR OPENS.]
- Maria.
- Hey.
Jessie.
Come in.
Have a seat and get warm.
ALL: Hi.
- Hey, Arlene.
- Hi.
Teabag.
There you go.
Thanks.
I got a new picture for the board.
- Is that your Donald? - He's in foster care right now, but I'm gonna get him back.
- That's right.
- He's really cute.
Looks like his daddy.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah.
Same eyes.
- Same attitude, too.
- Yeah.
[LAUGHTER.]
[APPLAUSE.]
ANNOUNCER: Jill Scott, for Isn't she so beautiful? You deserve it.
You really mean that? Yeah, I do.
[APPLAUSE.]
Here it comes.
Harvey Wasserman for "Touch in the Night.
" [FILM CLIP PLAYING.]
I want you to know if I, by some stroke of luck, win this fuckin' thing, you have a big piece of it.
I just shot that one scene.
It made the movie.
It's true.
- [MUSIC FROM CLIP PLAYING.]
- And the winner is Harvey Wasserman.
"Touch in the Night.
" [AUDIENCE CHEERING.]
Whoo! Fuck me sideways.
Whoo! Go get 'em, pervert.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING.]
[MUSIC FROM CLIP PLAYING.]
I'm too fuckin' drunk to be up here.
Ha ha! Oh, wow, thank you very much! That's too kind! Thank you, thank you.
Oh, shit! Your heart is on fire Because of my yearning over you Oh, shit.
Beware the Ides of March.
This about the guy that tripped and fell down the stairs? I don't even know what you're talkin' about.
I'm just here because it's time for Public Morals to pay you a visit.
Is 1:00 p.
m.
tomorrow good for you? Yeah, that'll work.
We'll take our piece, too.
Make it pretty.
Sure.
The Ides of March was yesterday.
Uncultured motherfucker.
Come on, Harvey.
Put on your boogie shoes.
Mm.
I, uh, I have two left feet and zero rhythm.
- You should ask my wife.
- I did ask her.
She said if you're too cheap to fly her out, then I'm your date.
- She said that? - So get out here.
It's not just a fantasy, it's a combination.
I get it.
You don't have to convince me.
I love the idea.
The fairy tale aspect will resonate.
But you can't make it for 40K.
I mean, "Missionary to the Moon" was what, 200K? Three? Approximately.
I just You can't raise that much back east? Yeah, but it's all mob money.
I want it to be aboveboard, all of it.
- I want to do it with you! - Yeah.
I can't scrape that much together for you.
But you might have a shot with someone who connects to a studio.
Really? You get in touch with Alexander Pullman at Falconhead Productions.
It's a small shop, but Alex used to be at Warners.
Tell him Nate Malone sent ya.
I bet he bites.
- Alex Pullman.
- Mm-hmm.
Thanks, Nate.
So, baby, leave a little time 'Cause you never know what's on my mind, yeah It only takes a minute, girl, to fall - Thanks, Arlene.
- Yeah, thanks.
Good to see you.
Bye, guys.
I like to introduce myself to any new faces.
- You're welcome to join me.
- Sure.
You comin'? Too cold out there for me.
Guess I'm used to California.
OK.
Hi, Betty! [LAUGHTER, CHATTER.]
Ahh.
- Got something for ya.
- What? - You'll see.
- Oh - Uh-huh? - yummy.
- How's that? - It's good.
- Yeah? - Yeah, it's very nice.
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
I got a house by the beach in Santa Monica.
You're gonna love it.
Actually, I have a really nice hotel room nearby with a really nice view.
- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.
I'm in.
TV: baseball made him its first - $100,000 player.
- Hey, Daddy.
- For 50 points, name that player.
- Joe DiMaggio.
Joe DiMaggio.
Joltin' Joe.
[APPLAUSE.]
[SHOW CONTINUES, INDISTINCT.]
So she win? Don't know.
She didn't call you last night? Pager can't take long distance calls.
Huh.
"Huh," what? I just I didn't know that pagers couldn't take long distance calls, that's all.
Yeah, well, it's no matter to you, because your busted-ass face ain't never leavin' this town.
Jesus, C.
C.
- [JACKHAMMER CLATTERING.]
- [HORNS HONKING.]
This is the best they could find? You wanted to be in Times Square.
[DISTANT MOANING.]
Did you hear something? [DISTANT PANTING.]
Hello? What the fuck? You set me up? Thanks a million, asshole.
He was a regular.
Well it's a start.
I am telling you, those white girls are getting $50 more per day.
Mm.
Jennifer, she do that other thing, you know? Kelly didn't.
She got 200, we were in the same scene.
That ain't right, Larry.
You gonna have to say something to Bernie about it.
All right.
I got you.
I got you.
If you don't want to get into it with Bernie, I'll do it.
I can do that.
I ain't scared of Bernie Wolf.
All right? I said I got you.
I'm gonna hit him up for that money that he owes soon as we hit the set.
I promise.
Go 'head.
Come on, Chocolate.
What the fuck is this shit? Detective Alston.
What, are we celebrating that you finally lost your cherry, Negro? Sit the fuck down, Rodney.
You tryin' to get us cuffed? That's my boy right there.
- You look beautiful.
- CHAUNCY: He comin', y'all.
Who comin' where, now? ALL: Surprise! [APPLAUSE.]
WOMAN: Hey, Leon! Welcome back! Fuck that murderous motherfucker! MAN: He's a tall motherfucker.
[CHATTER.]
RODNEY: Smells good.
What looks good, Darlene? You're not gonna eat your cake? Leon ain't hungry.
Two over easy, scrapple, right? - Yes.
- Comin' right up for you.
So, Nathan tells me you want to do a literary adaptation? Yeah, that's the idea.
Have you secured the rights? Because, um Public domain.
So it's a classic, like "Alice in Wonderland.
" Exactly.
If you want to do something like that, I might be able to get behind it.
And we want to do two versions.
We want to cut a couple of shots here and there and put it out as an R, just like Fox did with "Alice.
" Yeah.
What story? "Little Red Riding Hood.
" - That's not bad.
- Yeah.
You could practically bring the whole family.
[CHUCKLES.]
Don't take this the wrong way, but you're probably a little too old to play Little Red.
So I'm guessing the grandmother? No! I'm the director! Actress/director, right? No.
Behind the camera, that's all.
Candy, this is a business.
People aren't buying tickets to see the director's credit.
So you're sayin' what? I'm an investor, I have to be smart about where I put my money.
So what, you're not gonna pony up unless I fuck on film? Well, I haven't seen your recent stuff, but I'm sure you still look great.
Tell you what.
I'll write you a check for ten grand, and ten percent of the action, right now, if you come over here and suck my cock while I'm doing it.
[CHUCKLES.]
Yeah.
[BELT BUCKLE CLINKING.]
[ZIPPER UNZIPPING.]
[PANTING.]
- That's all I need.
- OK.
[LAUGHS.]
- Let me know when you open.
- We will.
Thanks again.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
Ours.
Ours.
Hey, uh, this isn't that kind of place.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I - Yeah.
- I didn't realize.
- Uh-huh.
I'll be right back.
[PULLMAN SPEAKING IN DISTANCE, INDISTINCT.]
You fellas have a license to operate? Oh, no, we don't, Officer.
Well, then, unfortunately I'm gonna have to confiscate this alcohol.
Here's your summons, Vince.
You pay the fine and the marshal here will come back and remove the padlock.
You'll be open for business tonight.
Thank you very much, Officer.
MAN: Hey, Vince, you messed up.
Looks like there's almost a whole shot left in this one.
All right, make it look good.
One or two crates.
- It's after 3:00 already? - It's like 1:30.
- What the hell you doin' home? - I got suspended.
Good.
You're alive.
So? Did he tell you what happened? Not completely.
Suspended for what? Tell him.
I got into a fight with Mr.
Linzano in gym.
- What do you mean, fight? - Like a fight.
He shoved me because I was fighting this other kid, - so I shoved him back.
- Shoved who back? - I said him.
- Which him?! - You're talkin' two fights! - The teacher.
- And? - And I broke his glasses.
I'm gettin' dressed, takin' you back.
You're gonna apologize.
I'm suspended, OK? Just let me be suspended.
I hate that hole.
Every day I go in there, I come back home dumber.
School is school.
You're not supposed to like it.
[ASCENDING STAIRCASE.]
When was the last time you spent more than ten minutes with him? - [DOOR SLAMS.]
- Just you and him? Been kinda busy, I guess, keepin' a fuckin' roof over our heads.
[CHATTER.]
Bernie.
Let me holler at you for a second.
Larry Brown.
What's shakin'? Say, uh, say a guy wants to get into something like this here.
The first thing I'd say is, that guy needs to be white.
What the hell Bernie.
You know what 90% of casting is? Lookin' the part.
Not a lot of parts for someone who looks like you.
Come on, man.
Give a brother a chance.
Let me lay it out for you.
White guys are the major consumers of porn, and they don't want to see a black guy's cock.
Makes 'em feel insecure.
You dig? Half these girls, they wouldn't fuck a black guy on a dare.
Interracial, uh, tarnishes their brand.
You sayin' these bitches is racist? It's not racism; it's economics.
There's no market for it.
Tell you what.
If Johnnie Keyes drops dead during one of his 45-minute marathon screws, you're my first call.
- You asked him? - Asked him what? About the money.
- Yeah, I asked him.
- And? The motherfucker's too cheap to pay what he owes.
So this is gonna be your last flight.
We're done here.
Goddamnit, Frankie! Vincent's in here every week askin' about the count.
- Mm-hmm.
- Tommy too! You really want Rudy to come knockin' on the door next? 'Cause the guy after Rudy's not gonna be knockin' at all.
Relax.
I practically invented this place.
- Oh.
You invented jerking off? - In a manner of speakin', yes.
You didn't invent shit! Go put it back in the office.
Just tell my little brother I'm gonna parlay today's take into a fuckin' jackpot.
- All right? - [MOCKING FRANKIE.]
Shay, how you makin' it? [SLURRING.]
I'm right as rain.
How about we get you a cup of coffee before you clock in? Coffee makes me edgy.
Sanka, then.
They say it's better for you, anyway.
I'm I'm cool.
Hey, hey.
Hey.
I gotcha.
Someone should fix that.
Yeah.
I'll make a call.
BERNIE: Darlene, you're supposed to be aroused, not asleep.
Why are we having sex on a plane with all these people around, and nobody even notice? It's a comedy, Darlene.
Doesn't have to make sense.
Well, I can't get into it if it doesn't make sense.
All right.
You're 30,000 feet up, he's a diplomat, it's thrilling, you're excited Maybe we should talk about my motivation.
I'm losing altitude, Bernie.
All right, cut! Everybody grab a cup of coffee, do somethin', relax What the hell, Darlene? - You spoke to Larry, right? - Yeah, I did.
And you still ain't gonna pay? What? Carrie didn't pay you yesterday? Didn't pay enough.
I want to know why I don't rate 200 a day like Kelly and Jennifer.
LARRY BROWN: Damn straight.
- That shit ain't right.
- No.
Right's paying what something's worth.
And I already told your man here, you're the wrong part of the Oreo.
Ho ho! Blow it out of your ass, Bernie.
Huh.
That's right.
We're done with this shit - Bernie.
- Come on! I still need the penetration shot! PATRICCIA: Seven-fifty for a handjob.
RUDY: And the girls are, what, 13, 14 years old? I mean, that sick fuck, he's got no sense of decency.
GIGANTE: Is this true? Is he using kids? It's not like he keeps birth certificates on file.
Who the fuck knows? Find out.
Hodas is King of the Peeps.
I don't dispute that.
He could make a castle out of quarters for all I care.
But he should stay the fuck out of the parlor business.
I admit I made a mistake approaching your swish down in the Village.
And I regret sending those Puerto Rican animals down to hassle his clientele.
But as I told the kid, once I realized he was with you, I left him alone.
Now, we all agree that the Village is open territory.
Yes? Sure.
I'm a man of good faith.
What's yours is yours.
You're goddamn right it is.
So where the fuck do you come off tellin' me who owns Midtown? We all came to an agreement years ago that the Deuce is open for business.
And if you're not makin' any money in your parlors, then open up a stationery store and sell fuckin' pencils.
I could give a shit.
I'll have someone talk to Hodas about the underage girls.
That's it? Thank you for bringing that to my attention.
[KEYS CLATTER.]
Mmm.
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS.]
WOMAN: Hello, Miss Merrell, it's Diane Rosenthal.
We're gonna need proof of a steady income before going any further with a loan application.
Can you bring copies of your most recent paystubs to the bank sometime next week? Please call me so we can arrange a time.
Bye-bye.
[BEEP.]
HARVEY: Hey there.
Hope you got home OK.
I'm at the office, going through my Rolodex, and I got a couple names you can hit up here in town, guys I went to film school with, might get you a little closer to what you need.
Just to be clear, you know, I'm still not helping, all right? This thing is your baby.
I'll see you soon.
[BEEP.]
JOAN: Eileen, it's Mom.
We need to talk about Adam.
Call me when you get this message.
[BEEP.]
[MACHINE RESETS.]
Everyone was lookin' for a little entertainment Whoo! Check.
It's your move, Oh Danny boy.
All along the line And we got stuck up in the tunnel Where no lights shine They got to touching all the girls who were I raise.
With what? Waiting for the end of the world With this.
Waitin' for the end of the world OK, then.
What the fuck? It's the key to a place I own on 49th.
I'm callin' ya.
[SIGHS.]
Ya know [DEEP BREATH.]
I always wanted an apartment in Midtown.
[CHUCKLES.]
Boom! That's the ballgame, fellas.
MAN: No fuckin' way.
The legendary hitchhiker says that he knows where it's at MAN: That hurts.
Ha ha ha! What can I say, it's the luck o' the Guineas.
All right, so, uh do we go measure for drapes, or? [DISCO MUSIC PLAYING.]
Michael! Ah, Mr.
Pipilo.
Good evening.
You're a smart fella.
What are you doin' wastin' your brain here? I dig the party.
I bet you do.
Hey, watch it.
Comin' through, yes, sir.
[BIG MIKE LAUGHING.]
Hey! Vince! [DISCO MUSIC CONTINUES.]
- Hey.
- Hey.
RUDY: That John Belushi over there? Yeah.
He's a maniac, but he spends.
I like that samurai thing he does.
Watashi no honto kotoro! Hana hana hana hana no na, hai! That's a good one, Rudy.
Wanna meet him? Nah.
Let him have his fun.
So.
What's the latest? About Paul's place He sign a lease? Yeah, just today.
I'm very happy for the kid.
Tell him I'm wishing him much success.
But? But things could get ugly.
Soon.
This shit with the parlors, with Hodas and the Horse If they want to come at us sideways, they might decide to go after our people.
Midtown, downtown, anywhere.
You should warn Paul.
Let him make an informed decision about his future endeavors.
I'll make sure he gets the word.
Good.
Next order of business, and it pains me to say this, - but your fuckin' idiot brother.
- What now? Irene says that he walked off with another truckload of cash this evening.
- Fuck.
- We're leakin' money, Vince.
He's a liability.
On account of him being your flesh and blood, I'm not gonna hurt him.
But I am gonna ask for his resignation.
Hey, he had a good run, right? Tommy here'll give him the news, assuming he can find him.
No, no, I'll do it.
I'll talk to him.
Tommy.
I'll handle it.
Relax, Vince.
I got other errands.
Hey, hit me up again.
[SETS GLASS DOWN.]
You got a full house in here tonight.
Lot of tail.
- Hey.
- You won! Best Supporting Actress.
Wow, that is so cool.
C.
C.
, isn't that cool? Yeah.
We got ourselves a bona fide celebrity in the house.
So what's it like out there? L.
A.
is so amazing.
It's so sunny and warm, and all the people there are, like, totally beautiful.
Like, everyone looks like they could be in the movies.
- Did you meet anybody famous? - I saw Jackie Gayle.
Who's that? Uh, he opened for Sinatra in Vegas, dummy.
- [LAUGHS.]
- I also talked to a lot of producers, and after this, they're all gonna want me.
Well, yeah.
You're on the all-world team now.
That little lady there says you rate 2K for a straight fuck.
I won this for acting.
[LAUGHS.]
OK.
Yeah.
Acting.
I'm serious.
And you know what else? I'm done tricking.
Oh.
[SETS GLASS DOWN.]
You done now? Just like that? Best Supporting Actress, C.
C.
Read it.
- [MELISSA SHRIEKS.]
- [STATUETTE CLATTERS.]
[CRYING.]
Fuck.
Don't forget what you are.
So this is it, huh? - Fluff N Fresh.
- Yep.
"In by 12, out by 5.
" At least the hours ain't bad.
Fuckin' imbecile.
[LAUGHS.]
What? Nothin'.
You got people that can run this fuckin' place? Hyun-sook.
Suck what? You're gonna need the help.
All right.
I look forward to doin' business with him.
Her.
Hey, Liam! Yeah.
Happy St.
Patty's Day.
Fuck you.
[FRANKIE LAUGHS.]
[SIREN WAILS, HORN HONKS.]
That Hodas bastard's up to all kinda nasty shit.
Underage, illegals.
You got a green card? I'm Puerto Rican.
Well, you better get one.
I'm not jokin'.
The cops are gonna start crackin' down.
You gotta be ready.
Your boyfriend Flanagan won't be able to help when it comes down.
What the hell is goin' on there, anyway? [CHUCKLES.]
I think he loves me.
Then you got the ideal customer.
That kind of addiction? Worse then heroin.
- And better for you.
- Don't say that.
You make it sound cheap.
What, you're in love with him, too? He's nice.
[LAUGHS.]
These guys come in here lookin' to fall in love Bunch of fuckin' saps.
LONGO: Bobby.
Johnnie Walker, rocks.
You here for some gash, Tommy? No.
Just thought I'd say hello.
Was in the neighborhood.
[SCOOPING ICE.]
Always business with you.
[SIRENS WAIL, HORN HONKS.]
Christ, this city! The Bronx is burnin'.
[SIRENS CONTINUE, LOUDER.]
That ain't the Bronx.
Round up the girls.
We may have to hustle 'em out the back.
Gotcha, boss.
[SIRENS CONTINUE.]
Christ! Fuckin' parlor down the street's goin' up in flames! Hmm.
Bobby, relax.
Ain't one of ours.
You should visit sometime, I'm tellin' ya.
The air comin' off the bay is so refreshing.
It's beautiful.
It's hard to get away when you're running a place.
And the energy in New York right now, it's, um, pretty incredible.
You should check out CB's.
Willie DeVille is there this weekend.
- I'm in.
- C.
C.
: Yo.
Dear Abby.
I need some advice.
I got a girl who thinks her shit smells like roses.
And the truth is, she's strung the fuck out on freeze and getting near her sell-by date.
What should I do about the bitch? Signed, Disrespected.
Um, Dear Disrespected, I suggest you skip the drink, go home, and take your bullshit with you.
[CHUCKLES.]
My goodness.
You back up on that horse, I see.
Hmph.
Which Bee Gee are you? [CHUCKLES.]
I'm Dave.
- Have a seat, man.
- ABBY: No, actually, I think you should leave, C.
C.
Oh.
Sorry.
I didn't realize.
Soon as I get my Hennessy, you two can go back to making goo-goo eyes at each other like a couple of fuckin' bobbysoxers.
How you been, Ash? My name's Dorothy.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON JUKEBOX.]
You have a good evening Dorothy.
DAVE: Who was that? Hmm.
Nobody.
[MUSIC PLAYING.]
It's like a free world.
Free world.
(DISCO MUSIC PLAYING) I'm not doing this anymore.
How 'bout making something really special? MOBSTER: Heard about that mess the other night.
We already have an understanding with Mr.
Pipilo.
I'd ask out of that arrangement and possibly get into a new one.
GENE GOLDMAN: Do you have any idea what's coming down the pipe, Detective? You know who benefits? Cats like you.
LORI: I got nominated! The chance to meet and greet the whole industry, both coasts.
- I could arrange sit-downs.
- Absolutely.
Then you gotta hire me as your agent.
[JET AIRPLANE IDLING.]
You sure you want to bring all that? They lose the bags sometimes, y'know.
Yeah, well, that's why you gotta be prepared.
OK, Daddy.
You think I need this coat? It's gonna be warm in L.
A.
What about inside the plane? Is it cold? You've never flown before? Never had the occasion till now.
Why would I want to be all crammed up in a tin can for four hours? - It's seven hours.
- Seven?! Yeah.
Let me see the tickets.
See? We land at 1:00.
Yeah, and we leave at 9:00.
Four hours.
No, there's a time change.
We go back in time? - I don't play that shit.
- No, it's It's a different time zone.
Yeah, I knew that.
You think I'm ignorant? - Are you nervous about flying? - Me? Hell, no.
It's not dangerous.
Only, like, a few planes go down every year.
Anyway, we should get goin'.
Hold up.
Gotta think on this.
Think on what? The awards are tonight.
Yeah, but if we all crashed up in the Nebraska cornfields, then ain't nobody winning nothin' but Best Burnt-to-Shit Motherfuckers.
Don't be crazy.
Fuck it.
- We're stayin'.
- What?! Yeah.
You're too valuable an asset.
Harvey can get your award, or send some Injun bitch up there like Marlon Brando did.
C.
C.
, I have to go.
You know I have to go.
Bring back that gold for us.
You know I will, Daddy.
[JET AIRPLANE TAKING OFF.]
See her picture in a thousand places 'Cause she's this year's girl You think you all own Little pieces of this year's girl Forget your fancy manners Forget your English grammar 'Cause you don't really give a damn About this year's girl Ahh-ee-ahh Still you're hopin' that she's well-spoken 'Cause she's this year's girl You want her broken with her mouth wide open 'Cause she's this year's girl Those disco synthesizers Those daily tranquilizers Those body-building prizes Those bedroom alibis All this But no surprises For this year's girl All this But no surprises For this year's girl Hey! PAUL: No, don't give me that look.
Just hear me out.
You remember how you felt when you first got the Hi-Hat, right? Hell, I remember how you felt.
I saw you, I was there.
Yeah, it was a nice opportunity.
Come on.
You loved it.
Yeah, I loved it.
That's all we're asking for, an opportunity.
Twenty-thousand dollars.
We don't need the whole amount.
I've got seven in cash.
You kick in the rest, we can secure the lease.
Yeah, personally, it sounds like a great idea.
We have to see what Rudy says.
Yeah, about that.
We want to do this on our own.
- With my money.
- It's a promissory note.
You're gonna get paid back with interest.
And Rudy still gets his nut on the original bar, but this new one, it's ours.
[SIGHS.]
You know, I thought you were the smart one.
- OK.
- Yes! Thank you, man.
Thank you.
- Fucking love you.
- All right.
All right.
[ALL MOANING.]
WOLF: Get a shot of Kelly's ass, would ya? And cut.
- [MOANING STOPS.]
- Very nice.
Darlene, Kelly, you're done.
Jennifer, stick around.
Let's set up the camera for the D.
P.
MAN: You heard him, let's go.
D.
P.
's up, you guys.
D.
P.
That's Director of Photography, right? Head cameraman? Nah.
D.
P.
means "double penetration.
" Double penetration? So you fuck her twice? Not exactly.
So - He's talented.
- Who, Eric? He got you goin', huh? No.
I mean, he's a trained actor.
I saw him in a toothpaste commercial.
He does have a nice smile.
Nice tongue, too.
CARRIE: Your paychecks cleared.
Great scene.
Very hot.
Thank you, Carrie.
You have another scene coming up later? No.
Why? Just thought I saw it in the script.
You read the whole script? LARRY: So your dick touches his dick? Not on purpose, but if it happens, who cares? - That shit is fucked up.
- WOLF: Drew, we're ready for you.
Personally I'm into it.
GOLDMAN: The high crime rate continues to deter visitors.
But law enforcement is only one piece of a coordinated effort with zoning reform and sustained economic development.
What the fuck does this have to do with us? - No fuckin' clue.
- Nothing.
Our overall action plan comprises a series of immediate, intermediate, and long-term goals.
For instance, in the short term we are supporting legislation to prevent "hot bedding" Renting the same hotel room more than twice in 24 hours.
- That's never done.
- Right.
- Good luck.
- We're proposing a permanent city-wide ban on massage parlors, and we will more closely regulate the distribution of collateral promoting sex-related businesses.
A tourist or city resident should be able to walk through Times Square without being constantly propositioned with handbills.
- I'm sorry.
Hand what? - [COPS CHUCKLING.]
- Handbills? - Oh, hand bills.
- Oh, OK.
- [LAUGHTER.]
The Broadway Theater District has seen revenue growth of over 100% in the last four years.
I shouldn't have given up dance lessons.
You might have been good at that.
The Manhattan Plaza Housing Project has added 1,700 residential units to the neighborhood with 70% occupied by performing artists.
And the city has plans for a new convention center on 11th Avenue that will provide a southwest anchor.
[MEN SNICKERING.]
- GOLDMAN: What's wrong? - Sorry, Gene, it's stuck.
- Damnit.
- Excuse me, gentlemen.
It's the damn budget cuts.
- What happened? - I don't know.
It just stopped.
All right, so you want us to come back? - I'll be right with you.
- Maybe it's overheated.
There's 16 parlors now between 7th and 10th.
You can't take a piss on 42nd Street without hitting one.
Are we still makin' money here? Yeah, but we won't for long.
I sent Black Frankie over to one of the new places last night with a $10 bill, he got a hand job and came back with change.
What, you didn't tip? Seven-fifty.
It was all right.
Seven-fifty? How the fuck are they making a profit? They ain't.
They're just trying to put us under.
It's what you call a loss leader.
Yeah, but here's the thing.
Tell him.
Wasn't no fuzz on that peach.
- [WHISTLES.]
- What, high school girls? More like junior high.
Fuckin' Hodas is out of control.
His people may be scumbags, but even they don't go for this shit.
Rudy, are you ready to come up? Yeah, sweetheart.
You boys hold the line.
No slashin' prices.
I'll get with Carmine over this.
Rudy.
One more thing.
You gonna join me, Vince? 'Cause believe me, I don't need your help.
Uh, it's about Paul.
He wants to open another night spot.
What, another fag joint? It's more like a supper club.
Piano player, top shelf liquor, dining room, good menu.
It's in a townhouse.
An upscale joint, huh? That's not a bad idea.
How much does he need? He doesn't need anything.
Then why are we having this conversation? Look, Paul's very grateful for what you did for him, he doesn't mean any disrespect, he just wants his own thing, free and clear.
Free and clear? So Paul invokes my name to shake the Horse, and now he wants to fly away from the nest? You got a hand in this bullshit? Yeah.
I'm staking him a few grand.
Just a loan to get him off the ground.
Figured he deserved it.
He's done good for us.
All right.
I'll get him in line, all right? No.
No, it's all right.
You sure? Yeah, I'm sure.
Now can I go get my fuckin' rocks off already? It's rude to keep a lady waiting.
ALSTON: Every four years, another action plan.
Another bunch of suits gettin' paid to write reports and make pie charts.
How many times have we seen this movie? Urban renewal is a reliable formula.
Plays well with the voters.
Well, it may play well with voters, but it doesn't play in a room full of cops.
We're catchin' dead bodies most nights of the week, and he's talking about box office receipts for Annie and A Chorus Line.
[LAUGHS.]
Cut Goldman a little slack.
He's a policy guy.
They tend to lack social skills.
I'm not sure about the policy, either.
Koch was pitching the idea of a combat zone during the campaign.
What the hell happened then? The red-light district? No, that's dead.
They don't want it moved anymore, they want it gone.
- You know why? - Somebody in Public Morals got morals? 'Cause every block in Midtown that's occupied by cash businesses that don't report their actual income is a million dollars in lost tax revenue.
It's not morals, it's money.
Don't underestimate this group of do-gooders.
Goldman and his kind, they bought into the Lindsay bullshit the minute they stepped out of law school.
These Midtown enforcement people are idealists, and we might be shuffling people around as a result.
Sir? I'm not so sure Officer Handbills is the best kind of person for Vice Squad in the Koch era.
I could put your name out there if you're interested.
I spent years trying to get out of that cesspool.
So, no thank you.
I'm happy where I am.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Hmm.
[SNIFFS.]
[TRAFFIC NOISES.]
Oh If the Rangers manage to limp into the playoffs, who would you want in the net? Thomas or Davidson? What the fuck do I know from hockey, man? I'm from West Baltimore.
BOBBY: Evenin', ladies.
Hey, Bobby.
Hey, Marilys.
Big night for you ahead.
ANITA: I'm late for work! DANNY: You don't need this shit.
You shouldn't be working here with all these fucking creeps.
It's my job.
And I do need this shit, because I got a kid back home that needs Pampers.
You gonna support me, Danny? Anita, I ain't fuckin' around here.
Flanagan, she's clockin' in.
This ain't your fuckin' business, Bobby.
It is my business if you're hassling my employees.
Watch it, man.
I make the right phone call, and the rent goes up.
Can we leave the soap opera out on the sidewalk? Please? Only because you said please.
DANNY: Come on, let's go.
Come on.
[JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING.]
Protestors [CHANTING.]
: You sinners are going to hell! You sinners are going to hell! You sinners are going to hell! You sinners are going to hell! REPORTER: Hey, Becky! Move away! Move away! - [CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING.]
- [CHANTING CONTINUES.]
Sorry.
Excuse me.
REPORTER: Sweetheart! Right here! [REPORTERS CLAMORING.]
- Shana! Shana! - Over here! [CHATTER.]
- LORI: Hey.
- CANDY: Hey! - It's our Best Supporting Actress.
- Nominee.
- Excited? - I'm very excited.
Where's your man? Oh, C.
C.
decided not to come.
No kiddin'.
I thought he'd want to be here to shake down Dave Friedman and the entire AFAA board for fifty bucks and an extra shrimp cocktail.
Turns out he doesn't like airplanes.
"Fear of Flying"? That's appropriate.
It's a book.
Now listen, after the ceremony, make sure you schmooze those money guys you're after.
Harold Lime, Nathan Malone, Bill Osco That's the plan.
The thing is, most people think of prostitutes as a cancer, and with all the police harassment, a lot of the women think of themselves that way, too.
OK, but we've had outraged people for a while now.
What's happening on the West Coast that's different? It started with outrage, and that was cool, but what it led to out there was organizing.
You make relationships with these women, and it opens a door to something bigger.
The goal is decriminalization.
Meantime, we help however we can.
Medical services, free legal aid.
Even just making them feel like they're not alone out there makes a difference.
That's what Arlene Carmen was doing when she got arrested in January.
I read about that.
"Loitering for purposes of prostitution.
" Dave's working with the NYCLU on her lawsuit.
That's why he came out east with us.
How are you arguing it? The law is unconstitutional.
Violates the Fourth and Fourteenth Amendments.
And Arlene's right back out there.
Do you wanna meet her? She's takin' the van out tonight.
I could meet you after I close up.
Sure.
No boys allowed, but I'll tell Arlene that the two of you are in.
DAVE: Don't forget to bundle up.
- Bye, Dave.
- Bye.
You OK? Mm-hmm.
Is C.
C.
still around? Yeah.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING.]
ANNOUNCER: Bobby Astyr, for "Barbara Broadcast.
" - Who are you? - I'm Harvey the Wallbanger.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, HOOTING.]
HARVEY: Can you believe how much money's here? How much money these people had to spend on these outfits? I mean, how can they afford it? Guess you were gettin' old.
What the hell? They're not showing any any of the good stuff.
Come on, look at these clips.
No titties? No titties, no twats, no fuckin'.
What, did we walk into the wrong banquet hall? I saw more cock in the men's room.
It's still a business doing pleasure with you.
- [APPLAUSE.]
- Whoo whoo! Oh, yeah, yeah, sure, he can act, but the real talent is keeping your dick hard for 14 hours.
Huh? No! We should be saluting Jamie Gillis's helmeted soldier! What if his parents are here? Think they want to see his cock up on the screen? I'm sayin' we don't need to be embarrassed by what we do.
We should be proud of our perversions.
ANNOUNCER: for "Baby Face.
" [MUSIC PLAYING.]
I read he got paralyzed from the waist down.
Know what I mean? Like, no fire down below.
All because of some dirty fuckin' pictures.
And now he's like I get it, Frankie.
It's a tragedy.
He's lucky he fuckin' survived.
He probably wishes he didn't.
Don't believe the heathens, Vince.
There is a God, and he's a twisted fuck.
- Know what I mean? - Amen.
Ella.
Hey, George.
You want some Metaxa? I don't want no fuckin' pioto.
OK.
You see that gamoto in the blue jacket? - VINCENT: Yeah.
- He's undercutting me.
Does he kick back to you like I do? I don't even know him.
You don't know him.
Then we have a fucking problem.
All right, relax.
I'll handle it.
Mike! Mike! Time to enforce the house rules.
Whoa.
"Death Wish II" over here.
The sequel.
[HORNS HONKING.]
- Hey.
- Hey.
- You ready? - Yeah.
Let's do it.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Abby.
[DISCO MUSIC PLAYING.]
- Excuse me, my man.
- Hey, brother.
- You lookin' to cop? - You're outta here.
What are you talkin' about? Talkin' about you peddlin' your shit in another man's establishment.
Take it outside.
What about that sheep fucker? He has an arrangement.
You don't.
I paid for this beer.
I'm gonna finish it.
[GRUNTS.]
MIKE: You wanna dance? Huh? DEALER: Get off me! Come on, man! [YELLING.]
[DEALER COUGHING, GROANING.]
It's a parody of "Westworld," except instead of cowboys and Indians, it's sex robots.
I mean, it is brilliant.
I also really loved [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
WOMAN: I read the script Hey.
Is that somebody? It's Jackie Gayle.
He was on Merv Griffin.
He opened for Sinatra in Vegas, too.
You know him? Met him a few times.
You're Lori Madison.
You're nominated for "Family Head"? Mm-hmm.
That's the one.
I actually thought you were better in "Still Just A Girl.
" That scene where you're recovering from amnesia with all those competing emotions? I went to Theater of Arts for years and I can't pull that off.
- What's your method? - Well, for that, I just thought about when I used to sleep at my grandparents' house, and when I'd wake up I'd sort of know where I was but at the same time I'd also sort of not know where I was, so it was like familiar but also not familiar at the same time.
Does that make sense? Yeah, it does.
It's a great scene.
Hmm.
What'd you say your name was again? Greg Taylor.
So you're an actor.
Uh, I've done some acting, but now I'm mostly a talent scout.
If you ever think about moving to L.
A.
, you should look me up.
As great as you are, you belong out west.
It's happening, right here.
ANNOUNCER: And the winner is Lori Madison! I think you're up.
- Shit.
- [APPLAUSE.]
- Go get it! - For God's sake, you're my father! Whoo! Yes! Yes, yes, yes! [CHEERING, APPLAUSE.]
We had the health center, but then we realized That most of the women can't come to you.
If we really wanted to reach them, we needed to meet them where they are.
Do you help them get out of the life? We would if they asked, but most of them don't.
We're not out here trying to save souls.
Their souls don't need saving.
And when they locked you up, did they at least let you order off a menu? No.
All I got was a bologna sandwich.
[DOOR OPENS.]
- Maria.
- Hey.
Jessie.
Come in.
Have a seat and get warm.
ALL: Hi.
- Hey, Arlene.
- Hi.
Teabag.
There you go.
Thanks.
I got a new picture for the board.
- Is that your Donald? - He's in foster care right now, but I'm gonna get him back.
- That's right.
- He's really cute.
Looks like his daddy.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah.
Same eyes.
- Same attitude, too.
- Yeah.
[LAUGHTER.]
[APPLAUSE.]
ANNOUNCER: Jill Scott, for Isn't she so beautiful? You deserve it.
You really mean that? Yeah, I do.
[APPLAUSE.]
Here it comes.
Harvey Wasserman for "Touch in the Night.
" [FILM CLIP PLAYING.]
I want you to know if I, by some stroke of luck, win this fuckin' thing, you have a big piece of it.
I just shot that one scene.
It made the movie.
It's true.
- [MUSIC FROM CLIP PLAYING.]
- And the winner is Harvey Wasserman.
"Touch in the Night.
" [AUDIENCE CHEERING.]
Whoo! Fuck me sideways.
Whoo! Go get 'em, pervert.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING.]
[MUSIC FROM CLIP PLAYING.]
I'm too fuckin' drunk to be up here.
Ha ha! Oh, wow, thank you very much! That's too kind! Thank you, thank you.
Oh, shit! Your heart is on fire Because of my yearning over you Oh, shit.
Beware the Ides of March.
This about the guy that tripped and fell down the stairs? I don't even know what you're talkin' about.
I'm just here because it's time for Public Morals to pay you a visit.
Is 1:00 p.
m.
tomorrow good for you? Yeah, that'll work.
We'll take our piece, too.
Make it pretty.
Sure.
The Ides of March was yesterday.
Uncultured motherfucker.
Come on, Harvey.
Put on your boogie shoes.
Mm.
I, uh, I have two left feet and zero rhythm.
- You should ask my wife.
- I did ask her.
She said if you're too cheap to fly her out, then I'm your date.
- She said that? - So get out here.
It's not just a fantasy, it's a combination.
I get it.
You don't have to convince me.
I love the idea.
The fairy tale aspect will resonate.
But you can't make it for 40K.
I mean, "Missionary to the Moon" was what, 200K? Three? Approximately.
I just You can't raise that much back east? Yeah, but it's all mob money.
I want it to be aboveboard, all of it.
- I want to do it with you! - Yeah.
I can't scrape that much together for you.
But you might have a shot with someone who connects to a studio.
Really? You get in touch with Alexander Pullman at Falconhead Productions.
It's a small shop, but Alex used to be at Warners.
Tell him Nate Malone sent ya.
I bet he bites.
- Alex Pullman.
- Mm-hmm.
Thanks, Nate.
So, baby, leave a little time 'Cause you never know what's on my mind, yeah It only takes a minute, girl, to fall - Thanks, Arlene.
- Yeah, thanks.
Good to see you.
Bye, guys.
I like to introduce myself to any new faces.
- You're welcome to join me.
- Sure.
You comin'? Too cold out there for me.
Guess I'm used to California.
OK.
Hi, Betty! [LAUGHTER, CHATTER.]
Ahh.
- Got something for ya.
- What? - You'll see.
- Oh - Uh-huh? - yummy.
- How's that? - It's good.
- Yeah? - Yeah, it's very nice.
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
I got a house by the beach in Santa Monica.
You're gonna love it.
Actually, I have a really nice hotel room nearby with a really nice view.
- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.
I'm in.
TV: baseball made him its first - $100,000 player.
- Hey, Daddy.
- For 50 points, name that player.
- Joe DiMaggio.
Joe DiMaggio.
Joltin' Joe.
[APPLAUSE.]
[SHOW CONTINUES, INDISTINCT.]
So she win? Don't know.
She didn't call you last night? Pager can't take long distance calls.
Huh.
"Huh," what? I just I didn't know that pagers couldn't take long distance calls, that's all.
Yeah, well, it's no matter to you, because your busted-ass face ain't never leavin' this town.
Jesus, C.
C.
- [JACKHAMMER CLATTERING.]
- [HORNS HONKING.]
This is the best they could find? You wanted to be in Times Square.
[DISTANT MOANING.]
Did you hear something? [DISTANT PANTING.]
Hello? What the fuck? You set me up? Thanks a million, asshole.
He was a regular.
Well it's a start.
I am telling you, those white girls are getting $50 more per day.
Mm.
Jennifer, she do that other thing, you know? Kelly didn't.
She got 200, we were in the same scene.
That ain't right, Larry.
You gonna have to say something to Bernie about it.
All right.
I got you.
I got you.
If you don't want to get into it with Bernie, I'll do it.
I can do that.
I ain't scared of Bernie Wolf.
All right? I said I got you.
I'm gonna hit him up for that money that he owes soon as we hit the set.
I promise.
Go 'head.
Come on, Chocolate.
What the fuck is this shit? Detective Alston.
What, are we celebrating that you finally lost your cherry, Negro? Sit the fuck down, Rodney.
You tryin' to get us cuffed? That's my boy right there.
- You look beautiful.
- CHAUNCY: He comin', y'all.
Who comin' where, now? ALL: Surprise! [APPLAUSE.]
WOMAN: Hey, Leon! Welcome back! Fuck that murderous motherfucker! MAN: He's a tall motherfucker.
[CHATTER.]
RODNEY: Smells good.
What looks good, Darlene? You're not gonna eat your cake? Leon ain't hungry.
Two over easy, scrapple, right? - Yes.
- Comin' right up for you.
So, Nathan tells me you want to do a literary adaptation? Yeah, that's the idea.
Have you secured the rights? Because, um Public domain.
So it's a classic, like "Alice in Wonderland.
" Exactly.
If you want to do something like that, I might be able to get behind it.
And we want to do two versions.
We want to cut a couple of shots here and there and put it out as an R, just like Fox did with "Alice.
" Yeah.
What story? "Little Red Riding Hood.
" - That's not bad.
- Yeah.
You could practically bring the whole family.
[CHUCKLES.]
Don't take this the wrong way, but you're probably a little too old to play Little Red.
So I'm guessing the grandmother? No! I'm the director! Actress/director, right? No.
Behind the camera, that's all.
Candy, this is a business.
People aren't buying tickets to see the director's credit.
So you're sayin' what? I'm an investor, I have to be smart about where I put my money.
So what, you're not gonna pony up unless I fuck on film? Well, I haven't seen your recent stuff, but I'm sure you still look great.
Tell you what.
I'll write you a check for ten grand, and ten percent of the action, right now, if you come over here and suck my cock while I'm doing it.
[CHUCKLES.]
Yeah.
[BELT BUCKLE CLINKING.]
[ZIPPER UNZIPPING.]
[PANTING.]
- That's all I need.
- OK.
[LAUGHS.]
- Let me know when you open.
- We will.
Thanks again.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
Ours.
Ours.
Hey, uh, this isn't that kind of place.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I - Yeah.
- I didn't realize.
- Uh-huh.
I'll be right back.
[PULLMAN SPEAKING IN DISTANCE, INDISTINCT.]
You fellas have a license to operate? Oh, no, we don't, Officer.
Well, then, unfortunately I'm gonna have to confiscate this alcohol.
Here's your summons, Vince.
You pay the fine and the marshal here will come back and remove the padlock.
You'll be open for business tonight.
Thank you very much, Officer.
MAN: Hey, Vince, you messed up.
Looks like there's almost a whole shot left in this one.
All right, make it look good.
One or two crates.
- It's after 3:00 already? - It's like 1:30.
- What the hell you doin' home? - I got suspended.
Good.
You're alive.
So? Did he tell you what happened? Not completely.
Suspended for what? Tell him.
I got into a fight with Mr.
Linzano in gym.
- What do you mean, fight? - Like a fight.
He shoved me because I was fighting this other kid, - so I shoved him back.
- Shoved who back? - I said him.
- Which him?! - You're talkin' two fights! - The teacher.
- And? - And I broke his glasses.
I'm gettin' dressed, takin' you back.
You're gonna apologize.
I'm suspended, OK? Just let me be suspended.
I hate that hole.
Every day I go in there, I come back home dumber.
School is school.
You're not supposed to like it.
[ASCENDING STAIRCASE.]
When was the last time you spent more than ten minutes with him? - [DOOR SLAMS.]
- Just you and him? Been kinda busy, I guess, keepin' a fuckin' roof over our heads.
[CHATTER.]
Bernie.
Let me holler at you for a second.
Larry Brown.
What's shakin'? Say, uh, say a guy wants to get into something like this here.
The first thing I'd say is, that guy needs to be white.
What the hell Bernie.
You know what 90% of casting is? Lookin' the part.
Not a lot of parts for someone who looks like you.
Come on, man.
Give a brother a chance.
Let me lay it out for you.
White guys are the major consumers of porn, and they don't want to see a black guy's cock.
Makes 'em feel insecure.
You dig? Half these girls, they wouldn't fuck a black guy on a dare.
Interracial, uh, tarnishes their brand.
You sayin' these bitches is racist? It's not racism; it's economics.
There's no market for it.
Tell you what.
If Johnnie Keyes drops dead during one of his 45-minute marathon screws, you're my first call.
- You asked him? - Asked him what? About the money.
- Yeah, I asked him.
- And? The motherfucker's too cheap to pay what he owes.
So this is gonna be your last flight.
We're done here.
Goddamnit, Frankie! Vincent's in here every week askin' about the count.
- Mm-hmm.
- Tommy too! You really want Rudy to come knockin' on the door next? 'Cause the guy after Rudy's not gonna be knockin' at all.
Relax.
I practically invented this place.
- Oh.
You invented jerking off? - In a manner of speakin', yes.
You didn't invent shit! Go put it back in the office.
Just tell my little brother I'm gonna parlay today's take into a fuckin' jackpot.
- All right? - [MOCKING FRANKIE.]
Shay, how you makin' it? [SLURRING.]
I'm right as rain.
How about we get you a cup of coffee before you clock in? Coffee makes me edgy.
Sanka, then.
They say it's better for you, anyway.
I'm I'm cool.
Hey, hey.
Hey.
I gotcha.
Someone should fix that.
Yeah.
I'll make a call.
BERNIE: Darlene, you're supposed to be aroused, not asleep.
Why are we having sex on a plane with all these people around, and nobody even notice? It's a comedy, Darlene.
Doesn't have to make sense.
Well, I can't get into it if it doesn't make sense.
All right.
You're 30,000 feet up, he's a diplomat, it's thrilling, you're excited Maybe we should talk about my motivation.
I'm losing altitude, Bernie.
All right, cut! Everybody grab a cup of coffee, do somethin', relax What the hell, Darlene? - You spoke to Larry, right? - Yeah, I did.
And you still ain't gonna pay? What? Carrie didn't pay you yesterday? Didn't pay enough.
I want to know why I don't rate 200 a day like Kelly and Jennifer.
LARRY BROWN: Damn straight.
- That shit ain't right.
- No.
Right's paying what something's worth.
And I already told your man here, you're the wrong part of the Oreo.
Ho ho! Blow it out of your ass, Bernie.
Huh.
That's right.
We're done with this shit - Bernie.
- Come on! I still need the penetration shot! PATRICCIA: Seven-fifty for a handjob.
RUDY: And the girls are, what, 13, 14 years old? I mean, that sick fuck, he's got no sense of decency.
GIGANTE: Is this true? Is he using kids? It's not like he keeps birth certificates on file.
Who the fuck knows? Find out.
Hodas is King of the Peeps.
I don't dispute that.
He could make a castle out of quarters for all I care.
But he should stay the fuck out of the parlor business.
I admit I made a mistake approaching your swish down in the Village.
And I regret sending those Puerto Rican animals down to hassle his clientele.
But as I told the kid, once I realized he was with you, I left him alone.
Now, we all agree that the Village is open territory.
Yes? Sure.
I'm a man of good faith.
What's yours is yours.
You're goddamn right it is.
So where the fuck do you come off tellin' me who owns Midtown? We all came to an agreement years ago that the Deuce is open for business.
And if you're not makin' any money in your parlors, then open up a stationery store and sell fuckin' pencils.
I could give a shit.
I'll have someone talk to Hodas about the underage girls.
That's it? Thank you for bringing that to my attention.
[KEYS CLATTER.]
Mmm.
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS.]
WOMAN: Hello, Miss Merrell, it's Diane Rosenthal.
We're gonna need proof of a steady income before going any further with a loan application.
Can you bring copies of your most recent paystubs to the bank sometime next week? Please call me so we can arrange a time.
Bye-bye.
[BEEP.]
HARVEY: Hey there.
Hope you got home OK.
I'm at the office, going through my Rolodex, and I got a couple names you can hit up here in town, guys I went to film school with, might get you a little closer to what you need.
Just to be clear, you know, I'm still not helping, all right? This thing is your baby.
I'll see you soon.
[BEEP.]
JOAN: Eileen, it's Mom.
We need to talk about Adam.
Call me when you get this message.
[BEEP.]
[MACHINE RESETS.]
Everyone was lookin' for a little entertainment Whoo! Check.
It's your move, Oh Danny boy.
All along the line And we got stuck up in the tunnel Where no lights shine They got to touching all the girls who were I raise.
With what? Waiting for the end of the world With this.
Waitin' for the end of the world OK, then.
What the fuck? It's the key to a place I own on 49th.
I'm callin' ya.
[SIGHS.]
Ya know [DEEP BREATH.]
I always wanted an apartment in Midtown.
[CHUCKLES.]
Boom! That's the ballgame, fellas.
MAN: No fuckin' way.
The legendary hitchhiker says that he knows where it's at MAN: That hurts.
Ha ha ha! What can I say, it's the luck o' the Guineas.
All right, so, uh do we go measure for drapes, or? [DISCO MUSIC PLAYING.]
Michael! Ah, Mr.
Pipilo.
Good evening.
You're a smart fella.
What are you doin' wastin' your brain here? I dig the party.
I bet you do.
Hey, watch it.
Comin' through, yes, sir.
[BIG MIKE LAUGHING.]
Hey! Vince! [DISCO MUSIC CONTINUES.]
- Hey.
- Hey.
RUDY: That John Belushi over there? Yeah.
He's a maniac, but he spends.
I like that samurai thing he does.
Watashi no honto kotoro! Hana hana hana hana no na, hai! That's a good one, Rudy.
Wanna meet him? Nah.
Let him have his fun.
So.
What's the latest? About Paul's place He sign a lease? Yeah, just today.
I'm very happy for the kid.
Tell him I'm wishing him much success.
But? But things could get ugly.
Soon.
This shit with the parlors, with Hodas and the Horse If they want to come at us sideways, they might decide to go after our people.
Midtown, downtown, anywhere.
You should warn Paul.
Let him make an informed decision about his future endeavors.
I'll make sure he gets the word.
Good.
Next order of business, and it pains me to say this, - but your fuckin' idiot brother.
- What now? Irene says that he walked off with another truckload of cash this evening.
- Fuck.
- We're leakin' money, Vince.
He's a liability.
On account of him being your flesh and blood, I'm not gonna hurt him.
But I am gonna ask for his resignation.
Hey, he had a good run, right? Tommy here'll give him the news, assuming he can find him.
No, no, I'll do it.
I'll talk to him.
Tommy.
I'll handle it.
Relax, Vince.
I got other errands.
Hey, hit me up again.
[SETS GLASS DOWN.]
You got a full house in here tonight.
Lot of tail.
- Hey.
- You won! Best Supporting Actress.
Wow, that is so cool.
C.
C.
, isn't that cool? Yeah.
We got ourselves a bona fide celebrity in the house.
So what's it like out there? L.
A.
is so amazing.
It's so sunny and warm, and all the people there are, like, totally beautiful.
Like, everyone looks like they could be in the movies.
- Did you meet anybody famous? - I saw Jackie Gayle.
Who's that? Uh, he opened for Sinatra in Vegas, dummy.
- [LAUGHS.]
- I also talked to a lot of producers, and after this, they're all gonna want me.
Well, yeah.
You're on the all-world team now.
That little lady there says you rate 2K for a straight fuck.
I won this for acting.
[LAUGHS.]
OK.
Yeah.
Acting.
I'm serious.
And you know what else? I'm done tricking.
Oh.
[SETS GLASS DOWN.]
You done now? Just like that? Best Supporting Actress, C.
C.
Read it.
- [MELISSA SHRIEKS.]
- [STATUETTE CLATTERS.]
[CRYING.]
Fuck.
Don't forget what you are.
So this is it, huh? - Fluff N Fresh.
- Yep.
"In by 12, out by 5.
" At least the hours ain't bad.
Fuckin' imbecile.
[LAUGHS.]
What? Nothin'.
You got people that can run this fuckin' place? Hyun-sook.
Suck what? You're gonna need the help.
All right.
I look forward to doin' business with him.
Her.
Hey, Liam! Yeah.
Happy St.
Patty's Day.
Fuck you.
[FRANKIE LAUGHS.]
[SIREN WAILS, HORN HONKS.]
That Hodas bastard's up to all kinda nasty shit.
Underage, illegals.
You got a green card? I'm Puerto Rican.
Well, you better get one.
I'm not jokin'.
The cops are gonna start crackin' down.
You gotta be ready.
Your boyfriend Flanagan won't be able to help when it comes down.
What the hell is goin' on there, anyway? [CHUCKLES.]
I think he loves me.
Then you got the ideal customer.
That kind of addiction? Worse then heroin.
- And better for you.
- Don't say that.
You make it sound cheap.
What, you're in love with him, too? He's nice.
[LAUGHS.]
These guys come in here lookin' to fall in love Bunch of fuckin' saps.
LONGO: Bobby.
Johnnie Walker, rocks.
You here for some gash, Tommy? No.
Just thought I'd say hello.
Was in the neighborhood.
[SCOOPING ICE.]
Always business with you.
[SIRENS WAIL, HORN HONKS.]
Christ, this city! The Bronx is burnin'.
[SIRENS CONTINUE, LOUDER.]
That ain't the Bronx.
Round up the girls.
We may have to hustle 'em out the back.
Gotcha, boss.
[SIRENS CONTINUE.]
Christ! Fuckin' parlor down the street's goin' up in flames! Hmm.
Bobby, relax.
Ain't one of ours.
You should visit sometime, I'm tellin' ya.
The air comin' off the bay is so refreshing.
It's beautiful.
It's hard to get away when you're running a place.
And the energy in New York right now, it's, um, pretty incredible.
You should check out CB's.
Willie DeVille is there this weekend.
- I'm in.
- C.
C.
: Yo.
Dear Abby.
I need some advice.
I got a girl who thinks her shit smells like roses.
And the truth is, she's strung the fuck out on freeze and getting near her sell-by date.
What should I do about the bitch? Signed, Disrespected.
Um, Dear Disrespected, I suggest you skip the drink, go home, and take your bullshit with you.
[CHUCKLES.]
My goodness.
You back up on that horse, I see.
Hmph.
Which Bee Gee are you? [CHUCKLES.]
I'm Dave.
- Have a seat, man.
- ABBY: No, actually, I think you should leave, C.
C.
Oh.
Sorry.
I didn't realize.
Soon as I get my Hennessy, you two can go back to making goo-goo eyes at each other like a couple of fuckin' bobbysoxers.
How you been, Ash? My name's Dorothy.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON JUKEBOX.]
You have a good evening Dorothy.
DAVE: Who was that? Hmm.
Nobody.
[MUSIC PLAYING.]