The Middle s06e02 Episode Script

Oh, damn it.
Where are all the spoons?! Ugh.
Sorry, Brick.
This will have to do.
Hey, if you get a chance, bring some spoons home from the cafeteria.
It's not stealing 'cause we pay taxes.
Okay, I looked everywhere, and I can't find any towels.
Okay, this is driving me crazy.
I mean, this morning when I got out of the shower, I had to dry off with a bath mat.
Nothing is where it's supposed to be.
Is this dementia? Is it finally here? Where the hell's everything going? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
What are you doing? Unlike you, the government doesn't just give me stuff.
The government doesn't give us stuff.
If it did, we'd have better stuff.
Oh! Pbht! If you people would stop thinking only about yourselves, you'd remember, hutch and I are in our own house now.
And by the way, when they say a place is unfurnished, they don't give you anything.
No silverware, no furniture, no accent pillows, nothing.
Ooh.
Eh.
I doubt we'll make soup.
Axl, you can't just come in here and start stealing our stuff.
Uh, last time I checked, there was five of us in this family, so, legally, I own 30% of everything.
It's my house, and you're not taking any of it.
Put it back.
You know when you die, it's all mine anyway, right? I'm the male heir.
It's just sad you won't let me have this stuff now so you can watch me enjoy it.
- Guess what.
- Nobody likes you? - Can't ruin my day, Axl.
- Ooh, a challenge.
Anyway, thank God I took the A.
C.
T.
s a second time because I just heard from Ms.
Marsh, the Guidance Counselor, that my scores went through the roof! She actually used the phrase "through the roof"! - Oh, way to go, Sue.
- Oh, that's great.
Snore.
You know what this means, right? This opens up a whole new list of possibilities of where I can go to college.
We're talking Denison, Michigan, Wheaton, Oberlin.
Yep, my future is wide-open.
- We're screwed.
- We are so screwed.
How are we gonna afford to send her to college?! Who told her to take the A.
C.
T.
a second time? Was that your idea? You take your low score, a-and you live with it.
That's what we did, and we turned out okay.
You know, this is really our fault.
Always encouraging her, telling her she can do anything.
We just got to be honest with her, Frankie.
She's talking about all these private and out-of-state schools.
She's go to know that's probably not going to happen.
Well, we don't know.
Pretty sure we do.
Well, we don't.
I mean, who knows? Maybe there'll be one of those billionaires that comes into the class and offers to pay everyone's college.
Are you drunk? I might have had a beer.
Come on, Mike.
You saw how excited she was that little sparkle of hope in her eyes.
Oh.
We used to have that.
Hmm.
Promise me please promise me you won't say anything.
We're not dashing her dreams right now.
Right now we are gonna do everything we can possibly do to get her into college.
And we can keep dream dashing in our pocket as a solid plan "B".
I guess I can always try to pick up some extra work at Little Betty.
Yeah, no, I'll find something, too.
It's not all bad 'cause when you come home, you'll smell like cake.
A shower chair! Dude, this is so cool.
We've been standing up like idiots for years.
Definitely take.
Ho-ho! Whoa! Check out this fondue set.
We can have fondue night.
I thought mom said you couldn't take any more of our stuff.
Mom said I could take anything I want down here including you, if I wanted to, which I don't.
But I still could, so I'm like a God right now, determining your fate, so I would choose my next words carefully.
Whoo! Oh.
Hey, is that It is! My old "Farmer Says" toy.
This is a pig.
Oink, oink.
Oh, wow.
It's my old math buddy.
Mom said I left you out in the rain.
8 times 8 is - 72! - 64.
Oh, no wonder it's down here.
It's broken.
Hello, mother.
Look what I found in the basement.
Remember this? You said these disappeared.
Well, they did With a little help from me.
"A.
" "A.
" "A.
" Nothing but net.
Nothing but net.
Hey, you know what's fun? Reading.
I can't believe you did this.
I could have been a professional basketball man.
You're always on me 'cause my nose is buried in a book, but turns out, it's all your fault.
All because you didn't want your son to play with his toys.
Sad.
Look, you played with plenty of toys.
Those were just the loud, annoying, obnoxious ones I couldn't stand to hear anymore after the first 500 beep-beeps, ding-dings, and woo-woo-woos.
Well, seeing how these were ripped from me at such a young age, I'm now going to make up for a lot of lost time.
Come on, old friends.
Konnichiwa.
Ah, crap, he found the noisy toys.
Mm-hmm.
Hola.
Guess what! Sue, we do a lot of guessing in this house.
Why don't you just tell us? I was chosen to write the senior play! - Ha ha! - Oh.
Well, actually, Brad was chosen, and then he tapped me, but it's a huge deal.
I mean, like, parents come, it's at nighttime, there's beverages.
- Sue, that's great.
- Your mom will go.
And Brad and I decided we do not just want to do the usual follies, you know, like where football players dress up like girls and everyone loves it.
No, no, no, no, no.
We want to tackle the real issues teens are dealing with, the ones that are living in the shadows, like, uh, low self-esteem or bulimia.
I don't know.
We're still working it out.
But with my new A.
C.
T.
scores and this groundbreaking play on my résumé, there is no limit to where I can go to college.
Maybe even international.
Like Oxford or The Sorbonne.
So my back was against the wall, and I was desperate.
I could only see one way out.
So that's one seat, economy class, to Bermuda.
And that's a one-way ticket.
No, I'm not fleeing my family.
Not yet.
Well, that was my pleasure, and thank you for flying Econo Blue Airlines.
I am telling you, Mike this job is even better than I thought.
I just let them know my schedule, and they send calls to me it's perfect.
I can do it in my P.
J.
s.
I can make dinner if while I work, I can even do this job in bed if I want to, and let's face it It's the only way I'm gonna make money in bed.
Thank you for calling Econo Blue Airlines, where we put the customer first.
Please hold.
I know we had sprinkles.
Well I'm heading off to my other job.
And I will be here working at my other job.
You know, I am proud of us, Mike.
We're getting out in front of it.
We're embracing the possible, and good things are gonna come of it.
Yep, we've finally achieved our dream of working around the clock.
The other oh, okay.
Ah! Mr.
Heck, thanks for letting us work on the play here.
Plenty of room in the basement.
Oh, dad, wait, before you go, watch this one part.
Sue, I got to get to work.
Oh, no, no, no.
But last time, you said you were just coming home from work.
It's a pretty small window.
Oh, please, please, please.
It'll just take one second! Please! Okay.
Okay.
So, we're calling it "The Loneliest Locker," and it's about Savannah, a lonely bulimic teen who is bullied and cuts herself and has anorexia and problems with alcohol and abuses A.
D.
D.
medication.
Mm.
I thought she just had bulimia.
So did her mom.
Sounds like Savannah's got a lot going on there.
Okay, Mr.
Heck, imagine this is a hall.
Got it.
Energy, energy, energy.
Focus.
Did you talk to the new girl? No, I'm not talking to the new girl.
Should we talk to the new girl? If we talk to the new girl, then we're the only people who've talked to the new girl.
Yeah.
You're right.
Let's not talk to the new girl.
Freeze.
That's what we said.
Here's what we should have said.
Hey, look there's the new girl.
Let's talk to her at lunch and welcome her to our school.
Neutral space.
Now we're in the new girl's mind.
Why won't they talk to me? I'm crying out for help.
Why did we move here? I was so happy in Dallas.
Dallas, Dallas, Dallas, Dallas, Dallas, Dallas.
Dallas, Dallas, Dallas, Dallas, Dallas.
Oh, my God, Sue! That was so good! We have to write this down.
Dad, did you remember what we said? Unfortunately, yes.
Dallas, Dallas, Dallas.
- Echo.
- Echo.
Dallas echo.
Hold on.
Let me check another flight.
As it turned out, the only problem with working from home is that I was working from my home.
Flip it.
Bop it.
Flip it.
Tap it.
Pull it.
So, as a Platinum Member, you earned double miles and you're eligible for a day pass to our executive club.
Thank you and enjoy your trip.
Oh, don't worry.
The extra legroom is a rip-off.
It's only like half an inch.
You won't miss it.
Let go.
Why? It's been there forever.
You only want it 'cause I want it.
I'm gonna crackle-paint it someday.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
If you want to all sit together, someone's gonna have to sit in the middle seat.
Mom! Where is the costume box? It was in the basement.
I'm talking to a customer.
Yeah, hi, Joan.
Still here.
If you can take a later flight, I might be able to get oh.
No, sorry.
There's a middle seat there, too.
The black cape was in it, and I need it to play bulimia in "The Loneliest Locker.
" Brad doesn't want to use his good cape.
Oh, yeah, I took that for a shower curtain.
You used my cape as a shower curtain?! To be fair, it was a shower curtain.
Mom! Make him give me back my cape! Figure it out.
I got it on the middle seat, Joan.
Just give me a second.
Ahh This takes me back.
Axl, you just show up here, and you take all our stuff! - That's so-o-o-o selfish! - Why? 'Cause I think of myself first? Uh, it's called being an American.
Check it out.
I get it, Joan! You don't want a middle seat! Nobody wants a middle seat! Well, maybe your mom shouldn't have died on a Thursday.
Yes.
I'd be happy to connect you to my supervisor.
Just let me have the oh, my God! You don't want any of this! I'm so glad it's Saturday.
Oh, crap.
It's Saturday.
I got to work.
What happened to "you never give up," and "it's the perfect job"? Well, it turns out, embracing the possible doesn't pay all that great.
You think Sue would hate us if we made her repeat senior year a couple of times? I'm calling it.
The dream is dead.
You want to tell Sue over nachos or a ice-cream-sundae tower? We're not telling her anything right now, but if we do, definitely the ice-cream tower.
What are we waiting for, Frankie? We accidentally got free premium channels for a month.
We've had our miracle.
It's her senior year, Mike.
You really want to ruin her senior year? I mean, I can pick up a couple more hours, maybe get a third job.
Yeah, right.
And who knows? I'm so tired, maybe I'll fall in a hole at the quarry, and we'll all hit the jackpot.
Well, we can't count on that, but I like the attitude.
Okay.
Are you serious? He took my nightstand.
There were cookies in there.
Don't you see? If Savannah doesn't find her way back, her dreams of one day becoming a senator/jewelry designer don't come true that's reality, Sue.
You know what, Brad? I didn't want to say anything, but you have been very controlling throughout this whole thing.
Well, I'm sorry, but some of the best directors have not been well-liked Barbra Streisand.
I-I can't think of any others.
Anyway, I'm sorry, Sue, but the ending of the play needs to be darker.
No one befriends Savannah.
She ends up alone.
It'll have so much more impact.
No! Savannah needs to have hope and believe that things are going to work out.
That's what people want.
Right, guys? That's right.
Well, actually, Sue, I got to go with Brad.
Sometimes you got to be realistic.
People do better in life when they face facts.
Dad! Oh, Sue's right.
If you don't have hope, Mike, you don't have anything.
Well, maybe if Savannah's parents had been more honest with her from the beginning, she would never have gotten all of these pie-in-the-sky ideas that never were gonna happen.
Oh, yeah? Maybe Savannah's parents told her the truth and dashed her dreams and sent her down a bad path.
Well, I happen to have a little more faith in Savannah than that.
I think she can handle it.
Hope's a powerful thing, Mike.
You never know what might come of it.
Okay, you and Savannah go live in the fairy world where she's heading for a big disappointment, and no one that loves her protected her from it.
My body's tingling.
We just moved people with art.
All right, that's it! - Cookie man.
- Oh! Yes! It's open! Up.
Oh.
Oh, but those are our cushions.
I know.
- That was harsh.
- Way harsh.
One dollar.
Let's play.
I did not think our home could become more annoying, and yet, it has.
Oh, my God.
I am so nervous.
I am the director, producer, star, and I designed the programs.
This is what Ryan Seacrest must feel like every day.
Okay, come on, come on.
I can't be late.
Two dollars.
Brick, turn that thing off.
We're leaving.
You know, if you would have just let me play with this when I was little, it would have been lost a long time ago.
Ironic, isn't it? Okay, you're not gonna believe this.
That was work.
Severe thunderstorms have shut down the Atlanta Airport, and they want everybody on the phone to reroute passengers.
What?! But that means you're gonna miss my play! Mom, I don't think you're getting how big of a deal this is.
The vice principal and the nurse are going to be there, so, yeah, it's a huge deal.
Look, Sue, I'll be there.
It's it's just that this pays time-and-a-half, and it's a new job, and I got to do it.
You go and be great, and I'll be there before the curtain goes up - I promise.
- Okay, but don't be late because if you miss the opening "Dream Dance Within a Dream Dance" sequence, the rest of the play won't make sense.
Whose locker is that? It's the new girl's.
I think her name is Savannah or something.
Have you talked to her? I can't talk to her.
I'm quarterback of the football team.
Well, I can't talk to her.
I'm top cheerleader.
Look, somebody'll talk to her, maybe some uncool kids.
Mm-hmm.
The new girl's not really our problem.
Oh! God, I'm not even a part of this family anymore.
Why do I have to sit through Sue's lame plays? 'Cause it's a big deal to your sister, and for every hour you sit through it, you earn back a cushion.
Florida.
Tallahassee.
I'm sorry, but we don't control the weather.
Yeah, if we did, it would be sunny all the time.
Florida.
Tallahassee.
I know, and I'm gonna get you to Tallahassee, if it's the I Florida.
Tallahassee.
I-I-I'm sorry.
Did I say Tallahassee? - I meant Chicago! - Florida.
Tallahassee.
I don't know what made me say Tallahassee! Florida.
Tallahassee.
- No, I understand your frustration.
- Florida.
Tallahassee.
And I am doing everything I can - to resolve this to your satisfaction.
- Florida.
Tallahassee.
Wyoming.
Cheyenne.
I am Bulimia.
You hear me through the bathroom wall, but you ignore me.
I am depression.
You give me a cinnamon roll and beg me to get off the couch.
- Yes! - I am negative thoughts.
You say you never have me.
Liar! I am A.
D.
D.
medication prescribed by a doctor for your friend.
You will use me to concentrate for finals.
Fool! Now you are mine.
Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.
Yes, well, I hope all the yelling made you feel better.
Yeah, I know.
I know I'm not there.
But I am doing my best.
Well, Sue's asking for you.
Look, I'm trying, but the storm grounded like a million flights.
Well, you've already missed half the play.
At least, I hope it's half.
I understand your frustration, and I assure you I am doing all I can to resolve this to your satisfaction.
Hey! Don't Econo Blue me.
All right.
Got to go.
You know, Clark, I wish we would have reached out to Savannah.
Savannah's gone.
Forget about her.
Instead, feel the wind in your hair in my jeep.
Maybe I could Instagram Savannah.
It's too late, Skyler.
She left, and now she's beyond help.
But not completely beyond help because she has hope.
But the point is it happened, and we will always, always remember The Loneliest Locker.
I had a lonely locker.
I've had a lonely locker, too.
Have you? Or you? Or you? We've all had The Loneliest Locker.
The loneliest locker, enough's enough If we say "hi" to each other, high school won't be so tough And don't ignore somebody just 'cause they're new 'Cause that new somebody could someday be you The loneliest locker is forever open Never to close, we sure are hopin' 'Cause we've got the combination for love Everybody, come on down to the stage and hold hands with the person next to you.
Come on.
Don't be shy.
We got the place till midnight.
Come on, everybody! The loneliest locker is forever open Never to close, we sure are hopin' 'Cause we've got the combination for love Well, have fun and thank you for choosing Econo Blue Airlines.
Where were you? You promised you'd be there, and you missed it.
You missed my senior play, and it'll never happen again, and it was a huge success.
- Tell her, dad.
- Yep.
I think the third ending was my favorite.
I liked the puppets.
I was shocked at how many meds bipolar bear had to take to get through the day.
Sue, I am so, so sorry.
You said you'd come before the curtain came up, and you didn't.
You know, even Axl came, and he didn't have to.
He was just being nice.
Look, I tried, Sue.
I really did.
But I just started this job, and I can't get fired, okay? Why did you even take this job, anyway?! You're already so busy! Well, it's not like I wanted Oh! You're missing my whole senior year! You're just missing everything.
You want to know why, Sue? Do you want to know why? Because I don't know how we're gonna pay for your college, all right? I mean, I am trying really hard here to embrace the possible, but you know what? It's just getting harder and harder because you want to go to all these great and awesome places, and we want to send you there, but to tell you the truth, I just don't know how it's gonna happen.
I just don't know at all.
I wanted to tell you at Chili's.
Look, I know.
I know we can't afford any of those schools.
I was just talking and dreaming and stuff for fun, but I would never want to do anything that would make you guys have to work harder.
You guys work so hard already.
But I love you, and honestly, honestly, honestly, please don't kill yourself for me.
Whatever happens, I am gonna be fine.
Oh, she's so sweet and wonderful.
The best.
How'd we get a kid this great? I have no idea.
She deserves to go to college wherever she wants, whatever it costs.
No matter what it takes.
- Third jobs, even.
- Done.
Just don't let her major in theater.