The Paynes (2018) s01e15 Episode Script

Keep The Payne Away

1 Unh-unh, Curtis.
No, no.
I knew it.
You cannot be left alone for nothing.
Where are you going? - Hey, babe.
- No, where are you going this early? I thought you was sleep.
You didn't know that I was not right next to you in the bed? You sleep You sleep like a feather, baby.
Come here.
Come on.
Come on.
Who, me? Me? Yes, Curtis.
Where Where are you going wearing this waist trainer? To the gym.
Curtis, take that thing off.
It's taking your blood pressure.
[SIGHING.]
Thank you.
Curtis, you are not going to that laundromat.
Baby, I just want to see what's going on.
And I told you not to go down there.
- Why? - Because, Curtis, every time you go down there, all of the workers want to quit.
That's 'cause they ain't know what they doing.
You are banned from going to the laundromat, okay? Who's gonna inspect the work, Ella? Me.
[COUGHS.]
[RETCHES.]
Baby, you don't know nothing about that stuff.
You a girl.
Curtis, just because I'm a girl does not mean that I don't know anything about that stuff.
Is that belt still on? And, Curtis, Terrence is down there, and the city is down there every day, so So what do they know? What does the city know? The city knows more than you, baby.
What if I don't like the colors you choose? You will.
You know you don't have no taste, baby.
Curtis, I have fine taste, except in men.
Now, that I agree with.
[CHUCKLES.]
I know.
[LAUGHS.]
Wait, you talking about me? Well, who else do you think I'm talking about? That contractor.
Curtis, he is doing a great job.
And I want to see.
I showed you the bills, baby.
And you said yourself that he is doing a great job and getting great bargains.
- But but - No buts.
No buts.
No buts, Curtis.
No.
Just do not go down there.
Ella, that is my place.
And you'll see it when it's done.
That's not right.
Well, sometimes you have to wait to see wonderful things.
Like we waited to sleep together, baby, before we got married.
You thought that was wonderful? Oh.
And you sure you you know you're talking to Curtis? Yeah.
[LAUGHS.]
And I and I settled.
And you know good in hell well we didn't wait.
Curtis, I was a virgin when we got married.
[LAUGHS.]
What part of your body? Curtis! I was! Baby, okay, okay, you was.
You was.
But you was the most aggressive virgin I ever had.
Out of all the virgins I had, you was the - Curtis! - most aggressive.
You know what? You knew every part of the body.
Just name it.
Just name it.
Hush.
"Come here, boy.
" I was so scared And timid.
Just all over me.
That's because I studied, Curtis.
[LAUGHS.]
Thank God for studying.
Would you just hush? Do we really want to talk about this, baby? No, no, we don't.
Curtis, no.
Do not go down to the laundromat.
- Okay.
- I mean it.
- Okay, baby, I won't go.
- Curtis, no, I mean it.
I'm not going, Ella, okay? Okay, well, where are you going? Going driving.
Okay, Curtis, go down there and see what happens.
I said I'm not going.
I'm not going.
[KEYPAD BEEPING.]
[RINGING.]
Hey, Terrence? - Hey, miss Ella.
- Yes.
Uh, beware, the wild animal is coming down to check on the laundromat.
I got it, miss Ella.
Thanks.
Yes, give everybody a break.
Hootie-hoo.
Hootie-hoo.
- Hey, miss Ella.
- Hi.
Ooh, Terrence.
Yes, this is turning out nice.
Yeah, yeah, it is.
Has Curtis been down here? No, I haven't seen him.
[LAUGHS.]
Good.
Then he's behaving.
I think so.
So, this really, really looks nice.
Thank you, miss Ella.
I really appreciate it.
You are doing such a fine job.
Think you're gonna do really great here.
Oh, and not only that, if you would take a look at this.
We passed? Yep, all those inspections, see? Yes! Curtis is gonna be so happy.
Oh, okay, now for the big question.
Go for it.
Are we gonna be able to stay on budget? Actually I think we're gonna be under.
Ah! [VOCALIZING.]
You know anything about that.
You know anything about that.
You okay? Yeah, you don't know nothing about that.
Okay.
You know, we make a good team, you and I.
We do, don't we? We should do more renovations.
How about this? Let's get this one done, and then we'll talk about it.
No.
No, miss Ella, I'm serious.
- What? - No, I mean, you're organized.
You stayed on top of the ordering and the schedule.
Well, I do like managing.
You should think about it, miss Ella.
You could do pretty well flipping and selling houses.
Flipping and selling Okay, well, let's just finish this one, and we'll talk then.
- Okay.
- Yes.
- So - Miss Ella? - Yes.
- Here.
Hi, babe.
Oh.
And I folded all the documents that you needed to sign.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Oh, Nyla, you know Terrence.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I got to admit, this is my secret weapon.
Nyla has helped me stay on top of all of this.
She is too modest.
No, you really have.
- Well, thank you.
- No, really, you have.
I'm terrible at that kind of stuff.
Wish I had somebody that could help me around here.
Well, Nyla Nyla is looking for a part-time job.
You are? Yeah, but I don't know anything about construction.
But you know about record keeping.
Yeah, a little.
No, you know a And she is good with that organizing.
Yeah, I can be.
Yeah, she is your lady.
Yes, she is.
Are we still talking about working? - Hello? - Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah, of course, miss Ella, but I'm sorry, she can't work for me.
Why not? I have a strict policy.
What's that? I don't hire women that I'm attracted to.
Awkward.
Well, uh [CHUCKLES.]
You young people really are bold these days.
I mean, you just say anything.
Well, it's the truth.
Well, okay, just because it's the truth don't mean you have to tell it.
You may as well hit her across the head with a club and drag her into the cave - and strip her.
- Please, please no hitting, no hitting, no hitting.
Oh, I'm sorry.
- That's right.
- I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
It's okay.
I'm sorry.
Did I miss something? No, it's all right.
Um, I'm gonna head back to the church.
- Okay.
- All right, thank you.
- Oh, thank you, thank you.
- Good seeing you again, Nyla.
Thanks.
You, too.
Why you about to cry? [IMITATES VOICE BREAKING.]
"It's good seeing you again, Nyla.
" Miss Ella.
- Yes.
- You got to hook me up.
Okay.
Just calm down.
Calm down.
I will.
She is beautiful.
- Well.
- Come on, miss Ella.
- I will.
- Hook me up, please.
You know I'm a good Come on.
Begging, begging.
[LAUGHS.]
Calm down.
I'll talk to her.
Okay, I just want to take her out sometime.
- That's it.
- Well, I'll let her know.
- Thank you.
- You welcome.
Now get back to work.
Okay.
And, listen, you keep an eye out for Curtis.
I will.
He's coming down here.
I know it.
Everything looks nice! Excuse me.
Sí.
C-come here.
No, no speak Inglése.
Come down here.
Come? - Here.
- Come here? Here.
So, no speak English? Inglésa? No comprende.
No comprende inglése.
Cómo te llamo usted? Mm, me name Manuel.
Manuel.
I'm a painter.
See, paint the I paint everything.
I paint.
Now, you know you not supposed to be here.
[NORMAL VOICE.]
I just wanted to come see, man.
Now, you know your wife would not be happy with you being here, right? Sí.
Yeah, whatever.
Well, you need to leave.
[SIGHS.]
I'm here now.
Just let me look, man.
I promised miss Ella I wouldn't.
Do you know how many promises I have broken to my wife? You do know what that says about you, right? Again, sí.
[SIGHS.]
Come on, man.
All right, you can look around.
Look but no touching.
Oh, it's like a strip club.
I got that.
I can do that.
This is nice, man.
- This is nice.
- Yeah? Like this.
Hey, did I hear you say that you was under budget? Yep.
Man, that's great.
Yeah.
I think you're gonna do really well here.
Wow, you think so? I know so.
Look how nice this place is.
Yeah, it is nice.
- Yeah.
- It is nice.
Thank you, Terrence.
You're welcome.
Welcome to your first laundromat.
Welcome to my - My first? - Yeah.
What do you mean by that? When this one blows up, you can have a whole bunch of others.
Hey, you think I'll be that big, man? I think you can.
Bop it.
[GRUNTS.]
My man.
You know what? You positive.
I like you.
You positive.
Well, thank you, I try.
Hey I saw you like that, uh, Nyla.
- Is that right? - Yeah.
Yeah, she's a beautiful girl.
Yeah, she's nice.
You know she been spoiled twice.
Excuse me? She got two kids.
Oh.
- Oh, really? Yeah.
- Yeah.
You got any kids? Yeah, one.
- You got one.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, you married? - No.
Never jumped the broom.
Oh, right, I mean, that wouldn't be good.
No, that would be cheating.
[MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY.]
Hold on.
You not gonna tell me that you cheat on your wife, are you? Oh, no.
Okay, 'cause that wouldn't be good.
Oh, no.
I stopped weeks ago.
You got a partner? I'm single.
Good, I'm single, too.
Well, I mean, except for my wife.
Right, right.
So, Ella told me that you found the money.
Oh, yeah, I did.
And you gave it to her? Dummy.
What? You're honest, too.
Yeah, well, the way I figure it, if I didn't get it by working for it, I don't want it.
See, that's from I like that, too.
I like that, man.
I'm the same way.
I'm the same way.
I work hard.
I worked hard for mine, too.
Yeah, well, it's a missing trait these days, - that's for sure.
- Yes, it is.
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes, it is.
So, uh You think I can maybe help you out around here? No, you cannot.
- Come on, man.
- No.
Now, Mr.
C, this is already breaking the rules.
Okay, okay.
- Thank you.
- All right.
What if I can hook you up with Nyla? What? Now, I saw you like her.
I mean, maybe if you let me help out a little bit, then I can just hook you up with her.
- Look.
- Mi casa mi casa su casa.
Look, I'm not letting you stay here.
All right? That's final.
All right, cool.
Thanks.
I'm still gonna put in a good word.
Well, I appreciate that.
Thank you, Mr.
C.
You welcome.
Now you can go.
You really gonna kick me out, huh? Yes, "Manuel.
" You said it right.
Mm.
You should leave now.
Okay.
I'm-a go on and go.
All right.
Keep up the good work.
I'll do so.
Ooh.
[WOMEN SPEAKING ON TV.]
[LAUGHING.]
[LAUGHING.]
What we watching? - [TV SHUTS OFF.]
- Nothing.
Well, it's funny.
[CHUCKLES.]
[LAUGHS.]
I turned it off.
Where have you been? Where have you been? I was out.
Out where? Around.
Curtis, did you go down to that laundromat? No.
Curtis.
What? No, I didn't go back.
Why are you lying to me? You know, Ella, I'm so sick of you, woman.
Always still thinking I'm lying to you.
[LAUGHS.]
'Cause you do.
Ella, I'm a man of God's.
Now you want to be struck by lightning.
Ella, I'm telling the truth.
Curtis, I just got off the phone with Terrence.
Who? Don't play with me.
No, I'm talkin' 'bout who's that? [MUTTERS MOCKINGLY.]
Who is that? That's the contractor.
Oh.
What'd he say? Curtis! You know what he said.
He said you have been down there, "Man-u-El.
" It's Manuel.
That boy's such a snitch.
He's just honest, Curtis, and he told the truth.
Honest is the same thing.
Okay, well? Well? - What? - Come on, baby.
What do you think? Think about what? What do you think about the laundromat? Curtis.
- Come on, baby.
- Baby, I love it.
Yes.
[LAUGHS.]
- I love it, Ella.
- Yes.
Ella, I'm-a divorce you.
I'm-a marry that laundromat.
Yes! Oh, thank you, God.
Baby - I did my best.
- You're doing too much.
You were so smart to hire that man.
I know it.
It really looks good.
- I know.
- It looks so great, Ella.
- He's doing a great job, Curtis.
- He really is.
- He really is.
- Yes.
You know what? I want to do something nice for him.
Yeah, I was thinking about giving him a bonus.
Not that nice.
Something else, something else.
- Okay, well - Give me something.
- Curtis.
- Something else.
Okay, babe, well, what are you thinking? I was thinking about hooking him up with Nyla.
Curtis, you can't give no woman to him.
That ain't no bonus.
You know he likes her.
Yeah, and I talked to her about it.
She's not interested.
How do you know that? [CHUCKLES.]
Because she said, "I'm not interested.
" No, baby, the reason she said she's not interested is 'cause you don't know how to talk to her.
[LAUGHING.]
Okay, well, then you go.
- You go ahead.
- I will.
- Good, go ahead.
- I will.
I will.
- Thank you, baby.
- You welcome.
- You're welcome, baby.
- Thank you.
You're welcome.
Now come on upstairs so I can go ahead on and [LAUGHS.]
tear down through that there.
That thang what I do.
Come on, let's go do this real quick.
[LAUGHS.]
I'm gon' love it, too.
Come on, baby.

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