Voyagers! s01e09 Episode Script

The Travels of Marco... and Friends

Who's the boy, anyway? Bogg, who is this guy? This guy happens to be one of the greatest voyagers who ever lived.
Kneel, dog! Kneel in the presence of Great Kublai Khan.
If Marco Polo doesn't meet Kublai Khan, it'll foul up Europe's whole understanding of China.
(GRUNTING) (SOLDIERS CHEERING) (SOLDIERS SHOUTING) The Karaunas! SOLDIER: Run for your life! Jeffrey! Bogg! BOGG: We travel through time to help history along, give it a push where it's needed.
Bogg! BOGG: When the Omni's red, it means history's wrong.
Our job's to get everything back on track.
(OMNI dings) Green light, kid! We did it! (PLUMMETING) Terrific.
Another three feet that way and we would've landed on the bed.
Don't complain.
Three feet this side and it'd be the birdcage.
Whoa, I'm freezing.
New York.
December 11, 1930.
Recognize the date? Fourteen days till Christmas.
(CHUCKLES) That's a lot of help.
Nobody's perfect.
Hey! Get out of there! Hey! Look out, kid! Hey, what are you guys doing? You chumps or something? You could've got youse moidered.
We could've got us what? Moidered, moidered, moidered.
As in dead.
Right.
Now get out of here! Get out! We're going.
We're going.
Okay, Charlie, take it up.
Was that English? Brooklynese.
Don't knock it.
The guy saved our tubas.
Our what? Bogg, look.
BOGG: Who is it? A politician? JEFFREY: Try physicist.
That's Albert Einstein.
Einstein? You mean E equals What is E equal? E equals mc-squared.
Right.
Is he supposed to be here? I think so.
JEFFREY: I know he came here from Germany sometime in the '30s.
Well, whatever's wrong probably has something to do with Bogg, look.
Youse, watch it! It's gonna fall! WOMAN: Oh, my God.
I'm sorry, Mrs.
Einstein Doctor I didn't mean I mean, I hope I didn't You hope you didn't save us? No, it's just that I didn't really mean to Yeah, well, say what you mean then.
What I think he means is he hopes he didn't hurt you.
Exactly.
Hurt us? How much could hurt when you saved our lives? Thank you.
I am eternally grateful, Mr Bogg.
Phineas Bogg.
And this is Jeffrey Jones.
Hi.
I'm a big fan.
(CHUCKLES) A fan? I feel like an American movie star.
Oh, sure.
We studied all about your theory of relativity at school.
Energy is equal to mass times the constant, which is the speed of light, squared.
Yes.
It applies to light energy in relative time.
You learned about light energy and relative time in grammar school? No, see my father, he's a professor.
A physicist.
That would explain it then.
Such a smart boy.
All right, youse, everybody out of here! We got to clean up! I'm staying onboard the Belgenland.
Pier 9.
You must have dinner with me onboard tonight.
8:00.
I could be talked into playing the violin.
I don't think We'll be there.
Good.
Auf Wiedersehen.
So nice to have met you.
Come, my dear.
REPORTER: Jeffrey Jones, smart kid.
Dr.
Einstein, does your theory suggest that time travel is possible, sir? EINSTEIN: Time travel? Yeah.
I suppose that is a possibility.
(EINSTEIN LAUGHING) I don't know why you told him we could have dinner.
Are you kidding? Pass up a meal with one of the greatest minds of our time? Well, I'm telling you, forget it.
I'm telling you, I'm hungry.
(DINGS) Green light, kid.
Now come here.
Hey, there! Come back here.
No way.
I'm staying for dinner.
Jeff! Hey, you two! Wait! There's no way, I'm getting anywhere near you.
Look, I'll make it up to you.
Don't waste your breath.
Hey, voyager! Voyager! Voyager! (PANTING) You want I should have a heart attack or something? You'd think that you young tykes don't have ears, the way you listen.
Bogg, who is this guy? Who's the boy, anyway? Wait a minute, who are you? Me? I'm Isaac Wolfstein.
You, you're a voyager.
But the kid, the kid I don't understand.
Since when do voyagers have little sidekicks to get in the way? Isaac Wolfstein? You're not You couldn't be Wild Man Wolfstein? Well, not so wild anymore, but who's to complain? But you're a legend.
Barely in my time, maybe.
Bogg? This is Jeffrey Jones.
I'm Phineas Bogg.
Bogg? No, I'm afraid that must have been behind my time.
Bogg, who is this guy? This guy happens to be one of the greatest voyagers who ever lived.
Him? Jeffrey! No, no.
It's all right.
Look at me.
A pathetic old man in a uniform that needs pressing.
Is this the proper end for a voyager? I don't understand.
What happened? Well, I retired.
They took my Omni, they took my Guidebook, they handed me my pension fund and they said, "Where do you wanna go?" And you picked here? Oh, why shouldn't I pick here? In 1925, this was a wonderful place to be.
Beautiful city, beautiful women, beautiful stock market.
Stock market? You mean you didn't know about What am I, a fortune teller? I should know the stock market's gonna crash? But your Omni My Omni only went up to 1925.
Oh.
Yeah, "Oh.
" I lose my entire pension, he says, "Oh.
" Look, I'm sorry.
You're sorry.
Everybody's sorry.
You work your whole lifetime for humanity, you sweat and slave, then you get old, and what do they do? They throw you away and say, "I'm sorry.
" Bogg, maybe we should just skip dinner and get out of here.
Wonderful! It would be wonderful to get out of here.
BOGG: Look, Isaac Take me anywhere.
Only, there shouldn't be any people.
I hate crowds and money.
Isaac! Money, I'm sick of dealing with it.
Hey, hey, maybe there could be a nice beach.
(STAMMERS) And some fruit to pick to eat.
And some fishing.
I like that.
All right.
All right.
Look, we'll drop you off on an island in the South Pacific.
But after that you're on your own, okay? Bless you.
May all your landings be soft.
I thought I told youse guys to get out of here! We're gonna, we're gonna.
Gee, you didn't have to do that.
(EXPLOSIONS) Careful.
Careful, watch his leg, Jennie.
Yes, ma'am.
Watch it.
Easy, Jennie, easy with him.
There! There! There! Try to make him comfortable.
Try to make him I'm going back to help the others out.
(PLUMMETING) You want to know why old voyagers retire? This is why old voyagers retire.
Where are we? This isn't the South Pacific isle.
Bogg? BOGG: It's stuck in the automatic mode again.
So why aren't you taking good care of your Omni? This is what I get when I ask for sun and sand? (BEEPING) Bogg, where are we? You have to ask? If you were old enough to have a brain in your head, you would know that this is a war.
Eastern part of France.
1870.
Got any ideas? You are going to ask a 12-year-old boy? I think it's the Franco-Prussian War.
You think? Why don't you check your Guidebook? Bogg, look! Somebody needs help.
Come on.
Are you crazy? Somebody could get killed out there! On the other hand, wait for me! Take it easy, easy on the leg.
Anything we can do to help? Yeah, just help me and Ms.
Barton get them into the trench.
We'll fix the wagon when the shelling stops.
Clara! Everybody stay down! I have to get her out of the wagon! You stay put.
Nobody moves.
Wouldn't think of it.
Clara! Get him out.
You got to go now.
Not until they're all out.
(COUGHING) Come on.
Come on, help us! Are you out of your mind? Come on.
I told you to stay back.
Give him to us.
Where's Ms.
Barton? She won't come until everybody's out.
Can I come help? The answer's no.
I'll die if anything happens to her.
Did you say her name was Barton? Yes, it's Clara Barton.
That's it! What? Clara Barton founded the American Red Cross.
There is no American Red Cross.
There will be one.
Here, take him.
You're gonna be okay? Yes, I will be all right.
I think I can make it out on my own.
(COUGHING) Where's Clara? Right behind Clara! Clara.
Clara.
(BOMB WHISTLING) Clara! Clara! JENNIE: She's not breathing.
That won't work.
Give me a shot.
Hey, Jeff.
I know what I'm doing.
I've never seen this done before.
Are you certain? (COUGHING) You did it.
You did it.
And you say you learned that technique in a Red Cross program? Junior Lifesaving Course.
A lifesaving course.
I never heard of such a thing.
You will.
(CLEARS THROAT) Your patients are all onboard and the wagon's fixed, Clara.
Thank you.
I'm sure they'll receive much better care away from the fighting.
Without you around, I doubt it.
Do you have to go? We're just passing through.
Right.
We're just passing through.
See you, soldier.
Bye.
Bye.
Coming? Bye.
Bye.
Now, can we go to an island? My ears are still ringing.
Will you quit complaining? Complaining? Who's complaining.
Will you two guys grab on? (PLUMMETING) Where are we, Bogg? July 1st, 1946.
On one of the Marshall Islands.
Well, could be a little bigger, but it's better than the Bronx.
Is the light green? The light's green.
Is it gonna stay green? Kid? It's gonna stay green.
I don't trust him.
You should look in the Guidebook, make sure it's gonna stay green.
Look, I told you, it's gonna stay green.
World War II is over.
The United States is in control of these islands.
There's nothing gonna happen for at least 30 years.
Is it too much to ask you should check the Guidebook? Look, just forget it.
Did I say something wrong? I just wanted to check the Guidebook.
He is the Guidebook.
Jeffrey, come back here.
You mean that now they give you a smart-faced kid instead of a Guidebook? I lost mine.
ISAAC: You lost it? Do you know what they could do to you? You lost your Guidebook? BOGG: I didn't have a choice.
My Omni fouled up and put me in 1982.
I lost my Guidebook, I picked up the kid, now I can't get back, understand? No.
Look, the kid and me do okay.
Jeffrey! Then you should teach the kid to have more respect.
These kids nowadays.
Does he often run off like this? You should put him on a leash.
Jeffrey, come back here or I'm gonna leave without you.
You wouldn't leave me here with him.
Try me.
That's the way to handle a kid.
Say you're sorry.
Sorry? Because I wanted to read the Guidebook, I should be sorry? Say you're sorry or you're going back to the city.
The city? I'm sorry, already.
I'm sorry.
I take your word for it.
This is a wonderful island.
Now shake.
Now can we get out of here? Now.
Well, Isaac, nice meeting you.
It's been my pleasure.
Bon voyage.
Well, the sand's not so bad.
It's a shame there aren't more trees.
Could die from sun poisoning without any shade.
And there's probably sharks.
Water this blue always has sharks.
So who's to complain? It's better than the Bronx.
(PLUMMETING) Alone at last.
Where are we? BOGG: China.
August 13, 1275.
You know you could've been a little nicer to him.
Was he nice to me? Well, you could've at least treated him with a little respect.
I mean, after all the guy is a I know, I know, a legend.
But I'll tell you, for me, he was a royal pain.
what's wrong? The date's familiar.
Well, I'll tell you, kid, sometimes you just got to sit around and wait.
Bogg! What? Bogg? What? I think you should see this.
Hi, guys.
Just catching a little shuteye.
Kneel, dog! Kneel in the presence of Great Kublai Khan.
By all the laws of my empire, you should be dead by now.
Sitting on my chair, looking directly at me when you speak, your mere presence in the royal garden, all are punishable by death.
And yet, if you can answer one question, I shall allow you to go free.
This one's all mine.
Where are my emissaries to the Christian Pope? Where are the brothers Polo? Take it, kid.
Bogg, that's it.
Marco Polo's supposed to be here.
Well, don't tell me, tell him.
The Great Khan awaits an answer.
Emperor Khan, are you saying the Polo brothers haven't come yet? Nine years ago they set out to bring the teachers from your Christian Pope and holy oil from Jerusalem.
Three years ago, I received word that they were returning and had passed through Kirman.
Then nothing.
It was as if they had disappeared.
Kirman, that's in Persia.
(BEEPING) You seem to be acquainted with the Polos.
Tell me where they are now.
We don't know, Emperor Khan.
Then I sentence you to die.
Oh, but we'd be more than happy to find out.
(BEEPING) Hang on.
(JEFFREY EXCLAIMS) JEFFREY: I can't figure out which has worse fleas, this horse or this vest.
See anything? Maybe over the next rise.
That's what you said eight rises ago.
I know.
Oh, my tuba.
We can't give up.
If Marco Polo doesn't meet Kublai Khan, it'll foul up Europe's whole understanding of China.
All right.
The guy in Kirman said the Polos were only a half day ahead of us.
They got to camp sometime.
What if what's happened to them has already happened? If what's happened to them has already happened, the Omni'd be red.
Right? Right.
Green.
Great.
(MEN SHOUTING) You hear that? Sounds like it's Just over the next rise.
Come on.
Come on.
(BLEATING) (SOLDIERS CHEERING) Come! Marco, don't be a fool! Give it to him! What's the matter with you? This is the holy oil.
Marco, we'll trade a few horses and get it back for you.
All the horses in Cathay won't buy you a new head.
(GRUNTING) That look like him? Give it to me.
Give me.
Looks right to me.
Stay here.
Give me.
Give it here to me.
You can't go in there.
Are you crazy? Excuse me.
Hi.
Look, I'm sure this is just a misunderstanding.
Now if you two would just step together and shake hands like gentlemen (OXEN GRUNTING LOUDLY) Is he with you? God rest his soul.
That's not exactly what I had in mind.
Couldn't we just talk about it, maybe some other time? JEFFREY: Look out.
On the other hand, if you want to fight JEFFREY: All right! Quick learner.
Oh, no.
Come on.
Sure you wouldn't like to talk about this? Bogg, the pole! The pole! Grab the pole and pull.
JEFFREY: Bogg? BOGG: Jeffrey? Are you okay? Jeffrey, where are you? Over here! Over where? Over here! Come on, I think there's a way out, but we've got to find Marco.
Good fight.
Wonderful fight.
Now, we eat.
They call him Oxen, in the plural, because he's bigger than any single ox.
You're a lucky man to have come out in one piece from that fight.
You certainly saved our Marco's head.
How'd it start? We were on our way to the Great Kublai Khan in order to deliver some papers he requested from the Pope and a bottle of holy oil from Jerusalem.
Is that what's in the box? Yes.
Oxen, the Chief Tartar, admired it, and I refused to give it to him.
So what? It's yours.
Not according to Tartar custom.
Here, if you have something which someone openly admires, you give it to him.
Don't let him see the Omni.
The what? Nothing.
It's just that I can't believe anyone would make up such a stupid custom.
That's what Marco thought, too.
That's what got him into all this trouble.
Well, I guess I have a lot to learn before I become any kind of a traveler.
The first is to respect the law of the land one travels in.
I'll drink to that.
Is there something wrong with my drink? What is that stuff? It's ox milk and blood.
Drink it with a smile.
I just got something stuck in my throat.
This drink's wonderful.
Every last drop, Bogg.
More drink for my friend! BOGG: You can't be serious.
Bottoms up, Bogg.
Somebody give that man a medal.
Dry fog? The dry fog is up on us.
Dry fog? What's the matter with fog? It's not the fog that's the trouble, it's what the fog brings.
What's that? The Karaunas! (ALL CLAMORING) The horses! Get the horses! They'll come from the hillside.
You there, get the men on the high side! Hurry.
(SOLDIERS SHOUTING) Bogg? Marco! Jeffrey! This way.
Follow me.
Where's Bogg? Bogg! SOLDIER: The Karaunas! Run for your lives! Bogg! Jeffrey! Come! But I can't find him! Come on, boys, run! Jeffrey, come on! Bogg! Come on.
(MEN SHOUTING) There.
This way.
Jeffrey! Jeffrey! Jeffrey! Jeffrey! Jeff.
Jeffrey! (GROANS) Jeff.
Marco! (BEEPING) Jeffrey! Jeff! Marco! Jeffrey! MAN: (ON PA) Blast area clear.
We have blast area clear at one minute and counting.
Fifty-five seconds.
ISAAC: You lost him? You lost Marco Polo and the young boy in the middle of Persia? How could you possibly do that? I already told you.
The Karaunas.
The Karaunas.
So why don't you find the Karaunas? Because I don't know anything about Karaunas.
I didn't even get a chance to see one.
So why don't you know something about the Karaunas? You were sleeping when the subject came up in voyager school? Yeah, something like that.
MAN: Test area is all clear of personnel.
Forty-five seconds.
Look, it's a long story.
Will you stop sounding like my mother and tell me what you know? Well, it's possible I could be persuaded.
I'll persuade you.
I'll persuade you until you can't stand up.
All right.
All right.
Don't stretch the collar.
I just wanted you should take me off this godforsaken little island.
All range observers should have eye protection in place.
Thirty seconds.
There's sharks in the water, nasty little crabs in the sand The Karaunas! The Karaunas, right.
The Karaunas is half-Tartar, half-Indian marauders.
They use the fog in that region to conceal their attacks.
What do they do with their captives? Well, they kill them or they sell them as slaves.
Where? In that same region where you were attacked, possibly Hormuz on the Gulf.
Thanks.
It's been my pleasure.
Hey, you're taking me with you? I am not taking you with me.
After all I've done for you? After all I've told you? You're going to leave me on this miserable desert island with a bunch of nuclears? Nuclears? Yeah.
The sign there.
That's what they're testing.
Hey.
MAN: 24, 23, 22, 21 I don't even know what a nuclear looks like.
I've been hunting all over the island trying to find one to talk to.
And you'd think they'd have the common decency Nuclear testing? to give a simple description.
Bikini Atoll.
MAN: 2, 1.
(EXPLOSION) And what was that? That was a nuclear.
And that nuclear, that's what that boy of yours said was in a green light zone? That boy of mine is named Jeffrey and it was a green zone.
That was supposed to happen.
It's just that I didn't put you on the right island.
And where do you think you're going? AUCTIONEER: Do I hear nine? To find Jeff and Marco.
You want to come along, you keep your mouth shut.
How do you expect to find him if you don't even know what a Karauna I am as quiet as Grant in his tomb.
What are my bid for this hand maiden? I want 10 pieces of gold.
Ten.
Do I hear 11? Eleven pieces of gold.
Twelve.
MARCO: No! You can't have it! Please, let the boy keep it.
It's only oil, for the blisters on his feet.
If this is oil for his feet, why did he conceal it from us? My mother in Venice gave it to me.
Your mother, huh? ALL: No! We'll take it to the auctioneer.
Let him study it.
Perhaps this is worth more than all these men and boy combined.
And so ends the travels of the brothers Polo and young Marco.
Even if we live, without the oil we can't show our faces to the Khan.
I'm sorry, Uncle, Father.
No, there's nothing you could've done.
Thinking about your friend? Oh, this is all messed up.
You're never going to make your journey.
And I'm never gonna see Bogg.
He wasn't captured with the others.
Perhaps he got away.
He would've been here by now.
Maybe he's trying.
A beautiful Venetian glass platter that just came in today.
The color, the clarity.
There can't be a more beautiful example in Hormuz.
Excuse me, I must do an appraisal.
Will you stop that? That's a Karauna.
Excellent.
Genuine indeed.
That's it.
Surely one of a kind.
That's the holy oil.
AUCTIONEER: Now, back to our Venetian glass.
So where are we going now? If he's got the holy oil, he's also got Marco and Jeff.
AUCTIONEER: There, I have a bid for two.
Who will give me three? You know the old coin trick gambit? Know it? I invented it.
You got a coin? (SIGHING) No, I'm flat broke.
Here, use the Omni.
They're making these things out of brass now? What is the world coming to? In my day, they were solid gold.
BOGG: (WHISPERS) Will you come on? Hello, there.
Interested in a little game of chance? This trinket against that scabbard? Look at this, look how it blinks.
(BEEPING) Yeah.
Double or nothing? Triple? I thought you invented that game.
Invented it, yes.
Did I say I was any good at it? Bogg! Thank God! How did you get away? No time to talk, come on.
I thought I lost you there.
What's he doing here? If it weren't for him, I wouldn't be here.
Let's go.
Come on.
Phineas, help, the keys! Are you hurt? The keys! The Omni rolled into the cell.
Bat's breath.
In the cells! Someone's broken in! I can't find the right key.
ISAAC: I think I twisted my ankle.
CHIEF: Are you thinking of leaving? (BEEPING) This is very interesting, very nice.
See? Little red lamp here.
How does it do this? It comes on and off with a bell.
What is it? I don't understand.
A time machine.
A time machine.
A time machine.
Wonderful.
This should bring good price, no? Very good price.
A time machine.
A time machine.
You always make jokes when you are in trouble? It helps.
I just hope you have a sense of humor when you go in front of the voyager board.
You know what they do for a lost Omni? (GROANS) My ankle.
No one needs such pain.
What no one needs is you.
BOGG: Jeffrey! It wasn't Bogg's fault.
It was your fault.
You're the one who messed it up.
You're the one who lost the Omni.
Hey, hey, hey, cool down, Jeff.
No! He's a stupid old man! Everything was going fine until he blew it.
He blew it for everyone! Look, Jeff, I wouldn't have been able to find you if it weren't for Isaac.
Don't defend me.
Jeffrey's right.
I'm a worthless old man.
Somebody to get in the way.
Wild Man Wolfstein.
He's a stranger to me.
Somebody who lived a long, long time ago.
On your feet.
Manacles on the men and the older boy.
We're taking you to the auction block.
Two objects for which there is no equal in this part of the world.
The first is believed to be, the precious Christian holy oil from Jerusalem.
While it may not have religious meaning to you, I assure you it is valuable.
The second is a talisman of extraordinary mystery and power, reputed to have been made by a tribe of sorcerers on a faraway isle.
He's close.
Maybe if they sell us together, we can get it back.
They are not gonna sell us together.
AUCTIONEER: This one will go for a price.
I will not sell the objects now.
I will give you time to look them over.
I am sure you will bid for what they are worth.
And now the slaves! Bogg! Fine young boy, soon to be a strapping young man.
Who will give me two gold pieces? Bogg? I'll find you, Jeffrey.
Wherever you are, I will find you.
Now that I have two, I want three.
Three pieces of gold for this boy.
Three gold pieces, here.
This should never have happened.
I want four.
Four pieces.
Four.
AUCTIONEER: Five.
Five pieces.
MAN 1: Here's five gold pieces.
I hear five pieces.
MAN 2: Six pieces.
Six.
I want (YELLS) Jeffrey! The wagon! Go get the wagon! (ALL CLAMORING) Get him! Oxen.
(JEFFREY YELLS) Where's Isaac? Isaac.
Go on! Leave me! No, don't stop, they'll catch us all.
He's right, boy.
Go! No! Do what the kid says.
Are you crazy? Don't stop! Get as close to him as you can! BOGG: Isaac.
All right! (DINGS) Look! Now it's green.
MAFFEO: That's a wonderful trinket.
Unlike anything I've ever seen.
Are you thinking what I am? That the Great Khan would like this, Father? Marco, now you are thinking like a Polo.
All right, Bogg, how much? Sorry, Nicolo.
We can offer you riches beyond your wildest dreams.
At least that's what Father and Uncle tell me.
I don't think it's for sale, Marco.
Jeff? Isaac? Thank you all.
You've made this a memorable trip.
I think you'll have plenty of things to remember before it's through.
Goodbye.
(DINGS) ISAAC: Green light.
That always gave me a special kind of feeling.
It should.
You're the one who got it that way.
Well, I had some help.
You know, sometimes when you're old, you forget what it was like to be young.
You start to think that the kids don't know anything, that you have to be old to have any wisdom.
Me, from now on, I listen to the young ones.
Even Isaac Wolfstein has got something to learn.
Me, too.
Just because someone's old, it doesn't mean they're washed up.
That applies to me? You've got plenty of Wild Man still left in you.
Okay, Isaac, name your place.
You've earned it.
Anywhere I want? Anywhere.
How about a place by the sea? A city, a humble job, but steady, a decent subway.
How about home? It's 5:00 already.
I've still got half my streets to do.
Phineas.
Jeffrey.
It's great to meet you, Isaac.
Yeah.
You should come back sometime for an egg cream.
I know a great place near Times Square.
You got it, Wild Man.
You know, I'm gonna miss him.
BOGG: Me, too.
What's an egg cream? It's a drink.
Milk, soda water, chocolate syrup.
No egg? No egg.
Well, then why do they call it an egg cream? You got me.
Where you going? To go have dinner with Einstein.
Oh, no, you don't.
We got things to do.
Yeah, like eat.
Jeffrey! Forget it, Bogg.
I've had enough of your beef jerky.
Hey, come back here.
No way, José.
Jeffrey! Jeffrey! JEFFREY: If you wanna learn more about the travels of Marco Polo or Albert Einstein, take a voyage down to your public library.
It's all in books!
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