Campfire Tales (1997) Movie Script

Hey, all you lovebirds
out there...
Rockin' Rob's telling you
to listen to this one...
from inside home, sweet home.
No joke, kids.
Police are still searching
for Willie "The Hook" Peters...
who escaped yesterday from
Burke State Mental Hospital...
so stay safe and stay cool
with this next hot tune.
# Oh, well #
# I'm #
# Uhh, sittin' here, la la #
# Waitin' for my ya ya, uh-huh #
# Uh-huh #
# A-sittin' here, la la #
# Waitin' for my ya ya, uh-huh #
# Uh-huh #
# It may sound funny #
# But I don't believe
she's comin', uh-huh #
# Uh-huh #
# Baby, hurry,
don't make me worry #
-I'm a virgin.
-You are?
# Uh-huh #
# Oh, yeah, baby, hurry #
# Don't make me worry, uh-huh #
# Uh-huh #
# You know that I love you #
# Oh, how I love you, uh-huh #
# Uh-huh #
# A-sittin' here, la la #
# Waitin' for my ya ya,
uh-huh, uh-huh #
What? What's the matter?
# A-sittin' here, la la #
Nothing, nothing.
# But I don't believe
she's comin', uh-huh #
Just a second.
Let's take this off.
No. No.
Unzip this. Come on. Just do it.
No. No!
Don't. Don't.
What gives, Jenny?
I thought you liked me.
Look, I thought
I saw someone out there.
# It may sound funny #
Come on, Jenny,
I know you don't want to do it.
You don't have to make excuses
about it, though.
I'm serious, Eddie.
I saw someone.
What if it's that guy
with the hook hand?
All right,
well, forget about it.
They're not--
Nobody's lookin', all right?
Come on, don't worry about it.
# Baby, hurry #
# Don't make me worry, uh-huh #
Unh. Unh.
There! I saw someone.
Well, I don't see anything,
all right? Now, come on.
# And, oh, how I love you #
There! There was a flash!
there's nobody out there, OK?
Eddie, listen,
I want to get out of here.
OK, how about just, you know--
No, no, no.
-A handjob?
-What? No!
Get--No! You take me home!
Take me home!
What are you doing?
Eddie! Drive, Eddie! Go!
All right. Cool it, will ya?
I just want to go. Take me home!
# Mama said
there'll be days like this #
# There'll be days like this,
Mama said #
# Mama said, Mama said #
# Mama said
there'll be days like this #
# There'll be days
like this... #
This doesn't look like my house.
Just one burger, all right?
# Everything was going fine #
# I met a little boy
named Billy Joe #
Chicks, man.
Eddie? Eddie?
-I'll have a milkshake.
# There'll be days like this,
my mama said #
# Mama said, mama said #
Oh, my God.
Why didn't the guy get
one of those fake hands?
God, man, I don't know.
They didn't have them
back then.
Like you know.
Slow down, baby.
It's under control, Lauren.
We should've
stayed on the highway.
Ohh, we don't need no highway.
We take the back ways, man.
This is the scenic route.
Would you get
your boyfriend in line?
Just chill out.
Enjoy the ride.
I shouldn't have come.
Whoo hoo! Ha ha ha!
Man, this is the best car, man!
Well, would you drive like
a decent human being?
Cliff, watch it.
Watch. Watch, watch, watch,
watch, watch, watch.
Whoo hoo! Whoo hoo hoo hoo!
-Knock it off.
-It's not funny, Cliff.
Aw, come on, Lauren,
lighten up.
Come here.
Cut it out
and watch the road.
-Not in front of my brother.
-You guys are gross.
Me? I'm not doing anything.
Would you get on
the right side of the road?
Come on, man!
Nobody else out here.
It's just us.
Cliff! Cliff, watch it!
-Are you sure you're OK?
-Yeah, I said I'm fine.
Oh, man. I'm sorry, you guys.
Oh, baby, I'm so sorry.
I know. I know.
Oh, God, you're bleeding.
Need a hand?
Fuck off.
Well, obviously
she's feeling OK.
Thank God
we didn't hit that car.
They came out of nowhere.
They came out of nowhere?
You were the one
that was all over the road.
Oh, my God.
I can't believe this.
Oh, my God,
my brother's gonna kill me, man.
I'm really worried about Eric.
He looks really shaken up.
Hey, you OK?
Want to help me
start these flares?
All right.
They didn't even stop.
Probably thought we were crazy.
Let's just start walking.
-You can start walking, OK?
I can't leave
my brother's car here.
If you had just stayed
on the highway like I said...
we wouldn't be here
freezing our asses off...
in the middle of nowhere.
Why do you have to be
such a pain in the ass?
Why do you have to be
such an idiot?
Fuck you.
Oh, God, would you guys
please stop it? Please?
Eric, where are you going?
-You guys, come look at this.
-Give me the flashlight.
Oh, my God.
Looks like
it must have been a church.
God, this place is creepy.
It's just a building, Alex.
Wow, this looks like
early nineteenth century.
I'd say...
How can you tell?
Well, it says it right there.
See, it's not that bad, man.
We're all OK, you know?
We saw a great concert.
It was pretty awesome.
There you go, buddy.
You wear that T-shirt
tomorrow to school...
you're gonna be the man.
Guys, maybe we should
go back up to the road.
That way, if a car comes,
then they can call for help.
Yeah, right before they kill us.
We're OK.
If a car comes, they're
gonna stop at the flares...
and we'll hear 'em.
You want to build a fire?
Don't burn the article
about the concert.
What's the matter?
Holy shit.
Two people were hacked to death
around here.
Yeah, right.
Let me see that for a second.
Oh, this is sick.
"Police speculate
that the murder weapon...
was an ice pick
or possibly even a meat hook."
They say they have a suspect...
but they haven't made
an arrest yet.
That's pretty freaky shit.
Hey, you OK, Eric?
What? Yeah.
You're lookin' a little scared
over there.
No. I'm not scared at all.
Well, uh...
I think that's just 'cause...
you know,
you're with me right now.
If you were alone, I mean...
you'd be shitting in your pants.
I mean, you'd be...
seeing and hearing things...
that weren't even here,
you know?
You'd feel like
you were being watched.
Every sound would seem louder
than it really was, you know?
You are such an asshole.
You're not gonna scare us.
You know,
if I did want to scare you...
I'd tell you
about Rick and Valerie.
-You'd tell her about who?
He's asking.
Yeah, tell me.
Come on, tell me.
I'm not scared.
Go ahead.
All right.
Rick and Valerie were these
newlyweds from Long lsland.
They decided to honeymoon,
road-tripping to Vegas.
They were gonna stop
along the way...
and see all the sights.
So they rented this big ass RV,
and they were off.
# I have kissed your lips #
# A thousand times #
# And more times
than I can count #
# I have called you mine #
# You have stood by me #
# In my darkest hour #
# And, oh, how happy #
# You have made me #
# Oh, how happy #
# You have made me #
Come on, everybody.
# Oh, how happy #
# You have made me #
# Oh... #
# Oh, how happy
you have made me #
Ooh. I think
this is where we turn off.
Oh, I'm turned off already.
Do we have to go?
History took place here.
You know, we could never
be back this way again.
Oh, now, that pains me.
You know, that's not a positive
way to start a marriage.
Besides, I want you
to look me in the eye...
and I want you to tell me that
you have absolutely no desire...
to see Clayton's Caverns.
Which eye?
Ha ha ha ha. Smart ass.
Either one.
I have absolutely no desire
to see Clayton's Caverns.
You know something?
I want you to read
page sixty-two.
I've read it already.
I want you to look
at page sixty-two.
I read it already.
For me?
1922, twelve pioneers
got trapped in the pass...
and only three survived
by eating the other nine.
Right. See?
Valerie, it's second only
to the Donner Party Trail.
-Oh, Ricky Ricks!
Well, it's dark outside already.
Besides, I don't know
what you think...
we're gonna see out there.
Dead bodies
strewn along the rocks?
Well, what would you rather do?
Oh, you devil.
I don't know.
Oh, you are a bad girl.
You are so bad.
I'm gonna punish you, bad girl.
Oh! OK.
Maybe next time
we'll make it to the bed.
I hope twenty years from now...
we'll still be knocking it out
on the floor.
Twenty years from now?
I hope
we're knocking it out anywhere.
I think
there's somebody out there.
Here. Put this on.
Aw, shit.
-You all right?
-I just twisted my ankle.
Stay here.
Can I help you?
Honey, wait inside.
We have money.
I ain't after your money.
That's just a crow.
Crows don't squawk at night...
unless they're stirred.
You know where the highway's at?
Yeah. I go straight ahead...
I get to the lake,
and I make a left.
No, no. You make a right.
You'll hit the highway
in about four miles.
Thank you.
And don't stop for anything
till you get to the highway.
Now go...
and pray
they don't get you first.
-Who doesn't get us?
When the moon's full...
they come out to hunt.
Now, you listen, boy.
A while back...
my wife's car
broke down out here.
We never found her.
They must have heard
my truck comin'.
You're lucky
you still got your skin on.
What do you mean?
There's tracks circling
all around your vehicle.
Now, I wasn't the only one here.
Now go.
All right,
come on, baby, let's go.
And no matter what,
y'all stay inside.
If they stop you...
you lock your doors
and wait for sunup.
Ain't nobody ever seen them
in the day.
I guess we better--we better
get moving along, then.
Thank you.
How bizarre was that?
"When the moon is full,
they come out to hunt."
Thought that was the Wolfman.
He seemed so...concerned.
Valerie, he's a Peeping Tom.
All right?
Who knows how long he was
out there jangling his keys?
What about all those footprints?
The guy made 'em.
What about his wife
If I were that guy's wife,
I would disappear, too, right?
Oh, man, what now?
-Aw, shit!
It can't be empty.
I just filled it up.
Well, maybe there's a leak.
Rick, he said to stay in here
no matter what.
Give me a break.
Oh, easy, Cole.
Easy. Easy.
I'll take you with me!
"The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want;,
"He maketh me lie down
in green pastures.
"He restoreth my soul.
"He leadeth me
in paths of righteousness...
"for His name's sake.
"Yea, though I walk
through the valley...
"of the shadow of death...
"l will fear no evil;
for thou art with me."
God damn it!
That son of a bitch
siphoned our tank.
No more.
Hear me?
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Aah! Aah!
Oh, Jesus. We should
run out of gas more often.
# I've learned #
# Love is a thrill #
# A little bit of lipstick #
# A little bit of frill #
# I know... #
Oh, God. You make me crazy.
# Love at first sight #
# Blows you all away #
# Hold onto the wheel #
# Love is here to stay #
# Love grows large #
# Blossoms like a flower #
# To die in the night #
# To be born again #
I just had great sex! Ha ha!
Get back in here!
What are you, crazy?
-Crazy about you.
-What's the matter, baby?
-My ankle.
-You all right?
-Yeah. It's OK.
Come here, sit down.
Let me see that.
Valerie, that's really swollen.
No, it's OK, Ricky.
There's got to be a first-aid
kit in here somewhere.
Jesus. I could catch
a fuckin' marlin...
but God forbid we cut ourselves.
Screw it.
I'm gonna go to that store
by the turnoff.
-I saw a pump out front.
-But, Rick--
I'm gonna fill up the can.
I'm gonna get you to a doctor.
They got to be closed by now.
So I knock on the door.
I'm sure there's some hick
sleeping in the back.
What if that guy's
still out there?
that guy is long gone by now.
I'm not gonna let you lie here
uncomfortable all night...
especially on your honeymoon.
I'm gonna be back in an hour...
and then
we're gonna get out of here.
All right?
OK, honey.
-I will. Don't worry.
Look, uh, if it makes you feel
any better...
you can lock the door
after I leave, all right?
And we'll have
a secret code, OK?
You don't open it until
you hear me go like this...
-All right.
Ricky Ricks?
Uh, can you bring me some M&M's?
-With peanuts?
I'll see what I can do.
Thank you.
I love you.
I love you, too.
Where the fuck
am I gonna find M&M's?
God, I hate
having an imagination.
You in there?
Are you all right?
Aah! Son of a--
Aah! Aah!
# Oh, how happy #
# You have made me #
# Oh, how happy #
# You have made me #
# I have kissed your lips #
# Oh, how happy #
# You have made me #
# Our years together #
# We have had-- #
Rick, is that you?
Rick, come on, this isn't funny.
Aah! Aah!
-Aah! Aah!
Get away from me!
Leave me alone!
Aah! Aah! Rick! Rick!
Rick! Rick!
Is anyone in there?
This is Deputy Munson
from the sheriff's department.
Are they gone?
Yes, ma'am.
You alone in there?
Are you injured, miss?
I think I'm OK.
Can you stand up
and come to the door?
Can you step down, please?
Oh, my husband
just went to get gas.
He should be back any minute.
we're gonna walk to my car now.
Oh, no.
I have to wait for my husband.
Why don't you come with me
to the car...
and we can sort everything out
at the sheriff's station.
Please, let's just keep moving.
W-wait. Just--please.
Keep your eyes straight ahead.
Keep walking to the car.
Aah! Aah!
Aah! Aah!
She screamed so loud...
that she drowned out the sound
of her husband's wedding ring...
scraping across the roof.
Well, I know one thing--
I'm not driving to Las Vegas
on my honeymoon.
I don't think you have to worry
about a honeymoon.
That story's not true,
though, right?
Nah, it is, man.
I know a couple of guys...
that lived in the town
it happened.
What's so funny?
I just remembered something.
Do you remember
when Dad went to Las Vegas...
and I had
that really bad nosebleed?
You were, like, I don't know,
five or six...
and it was really late.
You were sleeping...
and I was laying in Mom's bed...
and she just didn't know
what to do.
You know, she tried everything,
and nothing worked...
so she called Grandma...
and I guess
we must have woken you up...
because you were
standing in the doorway...
when the blood just started
pouring out of my nose.
This is funny to you?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
So when mom saw it,
she dropped the phone...
and just fell backwards.
She fainted.
And then
you went over to the phone...
and you said,
"Grandma, Mom's dead...
and Lauren's bleeding to death
in bed."
And then you just
hung up the phone.
It's all right, Lauren.
It's OK, Lauren.
We're gonna be all right.
It'll be like, um...
another funny story.
What the hell was that?
would you please not do this?
Oh, you're not scared,
are you, Cliffy?
You guys didn't hear that?
You think the flares
are still burning?
Yeah. We stacked them...
so they should burn
for, like, uh, a half hour.
Oh, man. Fuck.
Aw, shit.
I forgot to feed Dante.
Don't worry about it. I filled
his bowl before we left.
He's fine.
he's safe and sound at home.
Hey, that reminds me
of another story.
You guys want to hear it?
How about you, sweet cheeks?
All right, this is about a girl,
a little girl--Amanda.
It was the day before
her twelfth birthday.
She couldn't wait to get home.
I don't care if you were joking.
No, you embarrassed me
in front of my friends.
Well, maybe you should
have thought of that...
before you pissed me off.
In the kitchen.
Did you get it?
Your birthday's tomorrow.
Oh, can't I please
have my bike tonight?
Bike. That would have been
a good idea.
Hey, Odin. Come here, boy.
Is Mom home yet?
-Not yet.
-Come here.
Oh, what a good puppy.
Oh, come here, boy.
Uhh, uhh, yeah, uhh.
Listen, thanks for sticking
around with Amanda, Katherine.
You didn't wear that to school,
did you?
I did today.
-There she is.
-Sorry I'm late.
-Hi, girls.
Mom, did Dad buy my bike?
Uh, Mandy, you're gonna
spoil your appetite.
Sorry. Amanda, you're gonna
spoil your appetite.
Katherine, you're wearing
that top we got. Looks cute.
-Uh, hi.
-I know, I know.
I'll be down in a minute.
-Better hurry.
Oh, you guys hungry?
What do you guys want to order?
Uh, daddy, why don't you
just leave me the money...
and I can order us something?
Here. Here.
Oh, I don't think
this is gonna be enough...
especially if we order Chinese.
You're like a sieve, Katherine.
Here's another ten.
Here's your split.
I'm going out tonight.
Don't tell anybody, OK?
# I'm waiting #
# For something
to come through #
Oh, come on.
-Come in.
Hi, Mom. You look awesome.
Oh, thanks, honey.
So, is there anything
you want to warn me about...
before I see your teachers
Oh. Actually,
you know Mr. Blackman?
He caught me smoking
in the bathroom.
-I'm just kidding, mom.
-I love you.
-Oh, I love you, too.
We're going out to dinner after,
so I'll see you in the morning.
-Don't work too hard.
-I won't.
Oh, and, honey,
Odin's been digging again...
so if he goes back outside
make sure you wipe off his paws
when he comes in.
I will.
# No breathing #
# Your sweet melody #
# No boy talk #
# I'm waiting #
# With nothin' to do #
# I'm waiting #
# Just a-waiting on... #
OK, come on. Come on.
Oh, you're so silly, dog.
Come on. Odin.
What do you want?
If you touch my blow-dryer
again, you're dead.
Dina and l
are going out tonight.
If you tell Mom and Dad,
you're dead.
If you go in my room--
Let me guess--I'm dead.
More. Oh, you're my big boy.
What are you lookin' at?
I can't wait
till my party tomorrow.
Yeah, we're gonna have
a D.J. and everything.
Of course I invited Lisa.
All of the Lisas.
Oh, damn it.
I'll call you back, OK?
You go in the bushes and get it.
Flattery will get you nowhere.
I told you, I'm going out.
It's none of your business
Out here!
No. Amanda!
We'll discuss this later.
I told you, I'm going out.
If I wanted to tell you where,
I would have.
Jesus, you stink.
No. No, I wasn't talking to you.
I've got to go now.
OK, good-bye.
Good-bye. I'm hanging up now.
I'll be back
before Mom and Dad get home.
Remember what I said.
I won't say anything.
I'll see you when you're twelve.
I hope you get your bike.
Are you digging again?
Come on, Odie. Out.
So, this is
what you were digging up.
It's just
a pair of old clippers.
Come on, Odin.
Come on, Odin.
Stay. Come here. Come here.
Oh, good boy.
Come on.
Night, Odin.
Are you in here?
Is that you, Odin?
Hey, I've been looking all over
for you. Everything OK?
I was fine until
you scared the shit out of me!
Little brat.
There you are.
Yeah, you better hide.
I told you before.
Flattery will get you nowhere.
Katherine! Call 911!
There's a man under my bed!
You've got to be kidding me.
And by the time
the cops got there...
the guy
was out her window and gone.
And they say
that they're still...
surfing the net
looking for this guy.
So, you ever get
in a chat room, Eric...
and "Jessica" comes on-line,
you get out quick.
Oh, God.
I gotta pee.
You want to come with me?
Yeah. Let's go.
Don't let the crows get you.
Ha ha.
Why are you so hard on Cliff?
I am not that hard on him.
Yeah, you are, Alex.
Oh, can't you tell
he's just joking?
God, Lauren, you're so clueless.
What, two days ago,
you were whining about...
how he wouldn't meet you
at Tracy's party, and...
And what?
And it seems like
you don't have time anymore...
for anyone except Cliff.
You know, that's bullshit.
How about this weekend...
just you and me
do something together?
No guys?
No guys.
And about Cliff?
I really wish you would
just give him a chance.
You should see how sweet
and sensitive he can be.
So, you got hair
on your balls yet?
You're so immature.
I guess that means no.
Fuck you.
Look, it's no big deal,
you know, if you don't.
Thank you.
Lauren, just go already.
God, I hope
I don't get poison ivy.
Ha ha ha!
Hey, what was that?
What was that?
You didn't see that?
Cut the shit, Cliff.
It's not funny anymore.
No, man, come on.
Look, I think there's someone
out there with a flashlight.
Look, let's just--
let's get back to the fire.
Oh, you guys are such assholes.
You guys
should have seen yourselves.
You looked pretty hilarious.
Nice cheeks, Alex.
Don't worry. You'll get yours...
when you least expect it.
Hey, Lauren, can I get
under the blanket with you guys?
'Cause I'm pretty cold.
Yeah, come on. Come on.
Gosh, we've got to keep
our minds off the cold.
Cliff, why don't you tell us
another one of your stories?
Ooh, I got a great one for you.
All right, OK.
It's about this guy...
and he's cruising cross-country
on his motorcycle.
Thing was, he didn't know
what he was looking for.
But he knew he was getting
closer with every mile.
# Old man Jack was sitting
on a stump beside the fire #
# Got real curious, he put
his hand inside the fire #
# He was seeing things,
flashes of light #
# Faces from his past #
# Swallowed by the first friends
he followed #
# To the stars #
# Stars are the circuits
on the switchboard #
# Called the night #
# Welcome to the mystery
that starts another life #
# He was trembling and amazed #
# When his feet
first left the ground #
# Broke the break of day
and watched Jack walk #
# Without a sound #
Fuck. Terrific.
Hello? Is there anyone home?
Look, I was just wondering
if I could use your phone.
Thank God.
Hi. Hi.
I'm riding my bike
cross-country, and, uh...
it gave out on me, and...
I left it down near the road.
Oh, it's just my saddlebag.
Just some essentials.
No weapons
or anything sharp or...
This is really nice of you,
letting me in like this and all.
Me being a stranger.
I hope I'm not disturbing you.
Thank you.
Do you have a phone I could use?
I have a calling card.
No. Well, I guess
you don't have to choose...
between MCl and AT&T then, huh? got your tongue?
You can't speak.
Uh...I'm sorry.
I didn't realize, and, uh...
By the way, my name's Scott.
Scott Anderson.
"Heather Wallace."
You got a beautiful smile,
Heather Wallace.
Well, thank you. It's fluoride.
So, do you, uh...
do you live here
with your parents?
Just one.
Is it your mother?
It's your father.
Um, is he around?
Um, he's--OK, he's not dancing.
Let's see. He's--he's rowing.
No. He's--he's boxing.
He's not a boxer, is he?
Uh, he's--he's horseback riding.
He's horseback riding.
All right. In the rain.
"Driving the herd."
He's a real cowboy.
Now, would that be
a local herd...
or would that be a faraway herd?
Faraway herd.
I like your necklace.
It's beautiful.
Is there anything
I can help you with?
From the well, right?
I just--I felt trapped...
so I figured I'd just
hop on my bike and, like, ride.
You know, I think everyone
at least once in their life...
should know what it's like
to be completely free.
Looks like it's not going
to stop for a while.
Oh, I didn't mean
to startle you.
That music
just sounded so familiar.
I'm sorry. Good night.
Look, l, uh,
feel really silly...
and I don't want you
to think that...
This whole thing,
it's like a dream.
The storm, finding you here...
it's like it was all supposed
to happen or something.
what did I do?
I'm sorry. Like, we can--
we can just lie here...
if it'll make you
more comfortable.
You lie to me like a whore,
I'll treat you like a whore!
No, Papa, don't!
Oh, God, what have I done?
Oh, you scared
the crap out of me.
What the hell's going on
down there?
I saw someone outside.
What is it?
Ghosts? You gotta be kidding me.
This happened here before.
Why do you stay here?
You can leave, you know.
You can come with me, Heather.
I'm not sure where I'm going,
but we can leave together.
Now grab some stuff
and let's get out of here.
-You goddamn tramp!
Get down here! Now!
What the hell
are you doing in my house?
Papa, we didn't do anything!
You lie to me like a whore,
I'll treat you like a whore!
God, what have I done?
Oh, my God, Heather!
I thought he--you're all right.
You don't want to go in there!
No shit.
Goddamn tramp!
Get down here! Now!
Don't move from this spot.
Oh, Christ.
What the hell
are you doing in my house?
Look, I don't know
who you are or what you are.
You ruined my daughter,
you son of a bitch.
It's not what you think!
Come on, let's go!
Let's just get out of here!
No, Papa, don't!
Goddamn tramp!
Get down here! Now!
What's happening to me?
No! No! No! No!
And he just sat there...
staring at her head in his lap.
The rest of her body
is just slumped on the grass.
So, she was a ghost all along?
Yeah, but neither of them
knew it till the end.
Not bad, huh?
No. Not bad at all.
What's wrong?
Hey, the police are here.
Whoo hoo! Ha ha ha!
Whoo hoo hoo!
Hey, guys!
OK, guys.
We have alcohol on the breath...
head trauma, and
possible myocardial contusion.
We gotta get him to the hospital
right now.
I need to fly a medevac in
right away.
They came out of nowhere.
They were just weaving
all over the road.
I have to swerve
to get out of the guy's way...
and then he just veers
right off the road.
Hey, can you not do that?
Hey, sarge...
I got open containers.
We got V-tach.
Charge the paddles.
Charging two hundred.
Two hundred. Clear!
Still V-tach.
Charging three hundred.
Three hundred. Clear!
I'm sorry.
Charging three sixty.
Three sixty.
We have flatline.
Pupils are fixed and dilated.
He's gone.
Call in the code.
Time of death is 1 :21 a.m.
Back up!
Fuckin' moron.