George of the Jungle (1997) Movie Script

Deep in the heart of Africa
is a place no man has ever entered.
A place that belongs to the lion,
the elephant and the ape.
A place known as the Bukuvu.
Travellers flying overhead
can only glimpse at its many marvels:
Its sparkling rivers...
its lush veldts,
its billowy cloud formations...
and its hidden mountains.
- Never fear, my friends.
- George!
- George!
- All was not lost.
- George!
Scraped and boo-booed,
they searched high and low...
but they never recovered
their most precious cargo.
George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Lives a life that's free
Watch out for that tree
When he gets in a scrape
he makes his escape
With help from his friend
an ape named Ape
And his elephant Shep
can fetch a log
He's man's best friend
He's George's dog
He's George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
Hear him holler
swing and sing
All the animals come
to the jungle king
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
So grab a vine
and swing in time
If you smack a tree
just pay no mind
Like George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
Watch out for that...
Bang! Ooh! Tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Watch out for that tree
Twenty-five years later,
the bouncing baby boy...
has grown into
a swinging jungle king.
He is swift. He is strong.
He is sure. He is smart.
He is unconscious.
Meanwhile, 43 vines away...
George's kingdom was being threatened
by a terrifying intruder.
Hi, everybody. Me again.
Third day in Mbwebwe.
Look at this incredible...
- Banyan tree.
- Banyan tree. And look what's in it.
Could you die?
And over here...
is the outhouse, which you
don't want to see, believe me.
By the way, Betsy, thank you so
much for those moist towelettes.
They've been a lifesaver.
And these are the wonderful porters.
Wave, guys.
And this is our guide, Mr Kwame.
Without him, we would be lost.
This is great.
- And this is Lyle.
- Hello, Bujumburans.
- What are you doing here?
- What kind of greeting is that
to give your fiance?
- Aren't you happy to see me?
- Yeah, of course I am.
The jungle loves you.
You're beautiful.
- How did you find me?
- Well, I just hired the two
best trackers in the business.
Ah, I'm chafing, Max.
Ah, yeah, I'm chafing big time.
Didn't I tell you not to wear 20 pounds
of black leather in the jungle?
- Didn't I tell ya?
- Ah.
Cotton, I said. Cotton breathes.
Take my things to the lady's tent
and shake a leg.
Later that night, Lyle Van de Groot
lost no time in making arrangements...
- to whisk his wayward fiancee back home.
- All right, I'll take it, I'll take it.
Nairobi Hilton.
They can airlift us there in two hours.
Pillows, okay?
Wait a second. I'm losing you.
Bad reception here.
Okay, I've got you back.
No, wait! I'm losing you!
My batteries are dead!
No! Doody!
I don't want to go anyway, Lyle.
Tomorrow we're gonna...
climb the mountain where the big apes
are. Don't you wanna see them?
Only if they can shake a good gin
martini without bruising it. Hiyo!
Me and Thor here would be happy
to help you and the lady up
the mountain, Mr Van de Groot.
- Yeah.
- With Mr Kwame leading the way,
of course.
If you don't mind me saying so,
the apes...
are supposed to be a fascinating sight,
especially that white ape.
White ape? What's that?
Ask Mr Kwame.
I bet he can tell you.
- It is only a native legend.
- Could you please tell us?
The people say he is
over seven feet tall...
with the strength of a lion.
When the moon is full
and the air is sweet...
he wanders alone
through the jungle...
piercing the silence of the valley
with his mournful call.
Now, some say he is
thirsty for blood.
Others say he is calling
for the mate that he longs for...
but will never find.
By day, he rules the entire Bukuvu
from the top of the mountain.
But by night...
He and Bigfoot run the candy counter
at the Bukuvu Cineplex.
Now playing on all 14 screens:
Planet of the Apes.
Bigfoot? Max, that'd be worth
a lot more than any white...
- Ursula, what are we doing here?
- Lyle, I came all this way...
Okay, okay.
The things I do for you.
Looks like we're on, fellows.
As the sun rose
over Ape Mountain...
its agitated inhabitants sent an urgent
message to George by bongo-gram...
warning the jungle king that
intruders were close afoot.
Ooh. Lyle, listen.
What was that?
Could be the mating call
of the white ape.
Huh. White ape.
Sounds like a drink.
Uh, yes, bartender. I'll have
two Black Russians and a white ape.
A drink the venal Van de Groot
would be begging to imbibe...
if he only knew how near the white ape
was at that very moment...
flying through the foliage,
surveying the scenery, cruising in...
for a closer look and swinging on
through the trees with effortless ease.
And so, onward and upward
the tired trekkers trudged...
on feverish footsies
over perilous paths.
When they finally beheld the mighty
Ape Mountain, they reacted with awe.
- Aww.
- I said "awe." A-W-E.
- Ooh!
- That's better.
Single file on the bridge.
Step very cautiously.
It is full of rotten planks.
One false move, you could fall over.
Then you will have
a very long time to wave goodbye.
Don't you worry, peanut.
I was on a bridge like this in Maui.
It was steady as a rock.
Hey! S-Stop! Stop that!
Stop that! What th...
- I got you.
- No!
Don't worry.
Nobody dies in this story.
They just get
really big boo-boos.
What did I tell you?
You know, they shouldn't let
inexperienced guides
like that on these treks.
Did you see the look
that guy just gave me?
Probably saying I'm the biggest jerk
they've ever seen in their lives.
Probably trying to think
of something evil to do to me.
If they turn on us,
we're never gonna get home.
It's up to me to make the peace.
I'm going in.
Gentlemen. Cigar, cigarette?
Okay, gifts from America.
- Hey, hey.
- I give you a cigar,
you give me some of your lands.
All right.
A first contact has been made.
Ready, aim...
There you go, my man. Huh?
You like magic fire? Do ya?
Well, get a load of this.
There you go. Magic picture.
Yet another gift from America.
Here you go.
You're welcome.
Thirty-five millimetre.
Translation, please.
He says that he likes
your magic pictures...
but he prefers the resolution of
the Leica 35 millimetre transparencies.
He also says your lens is dirty, but he
has the equipment to clean it for you.
Well, tell him to clean this
while he's at it.
- Come on, let's go.
- Where?
Find you an ape, so we
can get the heck outta here.
Lyle, we can't go into the jungle alone.
We could get lost out here.
It's my job to get you
what you want.
You want a double decaf
latte with mocha sprinkles...
you will get a double decaf
latte with mocha sprinkles.
You want a white ape,
I'll get you a white ape.
Here, monkey, monkey, monkey.
Here, gorilla, gorilla.
Come on.
- Don't move.
- You mean I actually found one?
It worked?
- God, that scared me.
- Scared me, too.
I'm gonna go get help.
You wait here.
Oh, no.
Here, kitty, kitty,
kitty, kitty, kitty.
When lion brush last?
Don't tickle.
Don't ti... No...
Rubber tree always good for clothesline.
Upsy, kitty.
George not even trying hard.
Flying pile driver.
Havin' some fun now.
Bad kitty!
- That close one, huh?
- Watch out for that tree!
Funny-looking fella.
White ape.
Y... Y... U-Ursula!
Ursu... Wha...
Ursula, I found your scrunchie.
Go away!
It was horrible.
It was... 400-pound
white ape man.
The white ape
has my girlfriend.
I held him off as long as I could.
Blood everywhere.
The white ape... my girlfriend.
He... He weighs 400 pounds.
The white ape got my girlfriend!
The white ape got...
Help! Help! Man needs help!
After a night
of feverish fantasies...
the perfectly permed heiress,
Ursula Stanhope...
awoke to the melodious music of the
Bukuvu bird life, and found herself...
venturing forth in search
of that defender of the innocent...
protector of the weak,
and all-around good guy...
George of the Jungle.
But that's not
who she saw first.
Get away! Get away!
Get away!
- Hello. Oop!
- Oh, dear.
Feeling better, fella?
Okay. It's that dream, then.
I'm still having that
psycho dream. Hello.
- Oh. Oh.
- Oh, no, no! Don't worry! Ape friend.
- Ape make your breakfast.
- What does it want?
What does it want?
"Lt" wants its Physician's
Desk Reference, if you don't mind.
Unless you'd rather die
of dengue fever, of course.
That is very funny!
I thought I heard
the monkey talk.
But that is totally
understandable, right?
I mean, why wouldn't
an ape read textbooks?
And why wouldn't I find
myself in a tree house...
with room service and a Tarzan wannabe,
wearing a, um, um...
- What do you call that thing?
- Butt flap.
Bit of a shock, I suppose. Yes.
Cold compress. Dab her lightly, George.
"Talking monkey."
That's the ticket. Good.
Huh? Somethin' funny
about this fella.
She's not a "fella," George. She's
a woman, the female of your species.
You mean Ape and George
not brothers?
Well, in a sense,
we are related.
After all, we're both members
of the primate family.
Primate family. Brothers.
I suppose one might claim
that there would...
Mommy, make that monkey
stop talking.
Perhaps I should refrain from speaking
around her, as it seems to upset her.
- What your name?
- Ursula.
Ursula Stanhope.
- Who are you?
- George.
George Primate.
And that brother Ape.
Ape Primate.
Ah! Oh, um...
Okay, I'm gonna
pass out again now.
It's a sissy white ape.
I would've choked the life out of him...
except that he had two of his
lion buddies jump me from behind.
So in this version,
there are two lions with the white ape?
A minute ago,
there was only one.
H-Hey, the important thing,
Kwame, is that I was outnumbered.
Hi. When I woke up this morning,
I remembered about that lion...
and I know you
saved me yesterday.
- And I just wanted to say thank you.
- Ah!
Now that I'm feeling better,
I realize the others must think
I'm cat food by now.
And I don't want my fian...
this guy that I was with... to worry.
So, so I should probably go
and look for them...
and I was wondering
if you could help me.
Uh... Ursula want to go already?
Okay, George help.
Get trusty doggy.
Oh, you have a dog.
That's great.
Doggy will help find friends.
George call Shep.
Shep! Here, boy!
Come on! Here, boy.
Here comes Shep.
Come on, Shep! Come on, boy!
That a boy! Want to play?
Come on! Come on! Come on!
Good boy.
Come on, boy! Come on!
Good boy, Shep! Come on!
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
Sit. Sit.
Good boy!
Good obedience training.
- George trained from pup.
- That's your dog?
This Shep, George's big,
grey, peanut-lovin' poochie.
Good boy, Shep! Good boy.
Good boy, Shep. Good boy.
- That's a good boy. Wanna shake?
- Huh?
- Good doggy. Be nice.
- Shep.
Shake? George. George.
- See? Shep shake.
- Oh, George.
He's a big poochie, all right.
Does he fetch?
Here, boy. Come on, boy.
Want a stick?
Want a stick?
Where's the stick?
Where's the stick, Shep?
Here it is.
Here, boy. Fetch!
Come on, boy!
Run, run! Run, boy!
Atta boy! Good boy.
Go on, boy! Go get it!
Where'd he go?
- Wow!
- No, not in the roses!
Ungawa, Shep!
And so, with the help
of the jungle king's big, grey...
peanut-loving poochie,
George and Ursula set out...
on a desperate search to find
her fianc... uh, that guy she was with...
Lyle! Lyle!
- Ursula! Ursula!
- While he desperately
searched for her.
But by the end of the afternoon
her desperation had dimmed...
That was fantastic!
And she had given up
all hope of everything...
except enjoying the jungle king's
company from her precarious perch
atop his faithful doggy.
- So, where are we going now?
- To find Tookie-Tookie bird
for jungle news.
Tookie-Tookie bird.
I love that.
Later they rested,
while the tired tusker teethed on a...
Wait a second.
The dog bone is too much. Lose it.
That's better.
What could it mean?
Tookie say
little monkey in trouble.
George investigate.
What happened?
- Oh!
- Where other monkeys?
Where? There?
How many? That many?
Lots of monkey.
Then what happened?
Tell George more.
Little monkey say other monkeys
call little monkey "runt."
- Not let little monkey play games.
- Poor thing. Hi, monkey.
H-Hi. You okay?
Don't cry.
Little monkey like Ursula.
- What did you tell him?
- Just watch.
Meanwhile, back at a really
big footprint in the mud...
Let me through.
What's happening?
This footprint does not
belong to any of my men.
See? There's your proof.
The white ape does exist.
Now all we have to do is track down
the girl and the ape's in the bag.
N-No, seriously. I don't know
if I want to do this again.
Ursula need to relax when it come
to vine swinging, for George.
Swing, swing, swing.
Come on.
Want George of Jungle to tell you
special vine-swinging secret?
Fine. Tell me all your secrets.
George's secrets. Hm!
There's the shortest book ever written.
- Oh.
- Wrap it around your sock for
special George of Jungle foot lock.
- Now, ready to try again?
- No.
- Like this, Ursula!
- He flies through the air
with the greatest of ease
Our daring young man
on the flying trapeze
- Look, no hands!
- His movements so graceful
All girls he could please
And with love
he is swinging away
- He flies through the air
with the greatest of ease
- That's pretty good.
- George, watch out for that...
- Our daring young man on the...
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you the king of the jungle.
Where the devil is my egg timer?
- Tookie-Tookie.
- Tookie!
I'm fed up with this felonious fowl
stealing everything in the kitchen.
- Miserable creature.
- Tookie-Tookie.
George, what on earth
are you doing?
George just feel like looking
a little special today, that all.
Possibly there is a stirring
of special feelings within you?
George having stirring
of special feelings right now.
I see.
- Good thing she same species, huh?
- Yes.
Tell George how to make
Ursula George's mate.
Please? Brother?
First, command her attention by bulging
out your cheeks and pursing your lips.
- Show George.
- All right. Just like this. Watch.
Even puffier.
Next, display your interest
by drawing back your upper lip...
jutting your jaw forward
and exposing your teeth.
- Like this? Like this? Right?
- Now, throw a handful
of leaves in the air...
then leap about and hoot
in a dominant fashion.
- Like this, Ape?
- Good. She won't be able to resist that.
Gosh, this trail's really rough.
"Ursula! Ursula!"
- Hey, come back here.
- They're not abandoning us, are they?
They are threatening.
If you don't mind, Kwame...
I have a knack for getting
the most out of my employees.
- Do you mind if I address the porters?
- They only speak Swahili.
Well, I just happen to have
a Swahili phrase book.
Be my guest.
I think our troubles are over.
Tell them I'll pay 50 zamoles
a man if they'll help me capture
the white ape and bring him back alive.
Alive? After he, uh...
Well, he pulled Ursula's scrunchie off,
we know that much.
- 50 zamoles a man. What do you say?
- They only speak Swahili.
One hundred zamoles a man
and you got a deal.
- Hey, wait a second.
- Done.
Meanwhile, at a very big
and expensive waterfall set...
Ursula was amazed that she was lost
in the wilderness with a jungle man.
Here I am, lost in the wilderness
with a jungle man.
I should be terrified that no one
will ever find me, but I'm not.
- Thank you.
- For what?
For this adventure.
It's what I've always wanted.
King of jungle
only here to help.
Mr Boombastic
The awesome, boombastic
romantic, fantastic lover
Mr Lover-Lover
- Mr Lover-Lover
- George, are you okay?
- Mr Lover-Lover
- Your face is swelling up like...
- Ah, Mr Lover-Lover
- Is something in my teeth?
Listen, um...
I'm gonna step outside
for a little air, okay?
- Are you sure you threw the leaves?
- Yeah, George threw leaves.
Well, cheer up, old boy.
I spent all day...
poring through every book
in the library...
and finally I found this.
It's positively packed full
of human courtship rituals.
"What's a nice girl like you...
doing in a plane like this?"
Go for it.
- Hi.
- Hi.
What... Oh.
- Did you fight a crocodile for this?
- Oh. No, George not fight.
Crocodile have toothache.
George pull tooth.
Crocodile give to George after. Gift.
Good juju.
- Juju?
- Good luck. Protection.
I have something like that too.
Want to see?
It's not worth anything.
I found it in a cereal box
when I was ten years old.
It's my good luck. My juju.
- Can l...
- Oh.
I want you to have that.
For George?
That's the nicest present
George ever get.
Thank you.
- All right, man.
- Yeah.
It dancin' time.
- Ursula, wanna dance?
- Oh, no. Thanks.
- I'd be too embarrassed.
- What mean "embarrassed"?
That's when you feel stupid
in front of other people.
You know, like
they're judging you.
- You've never felt that?
- No.
There are no other people.
- Good point.
- George not feel stupid.
Sometimes George smash
into tree, and sometime...
Sometimes George fall out of tree house,
but not feel stupid.
Something good
always happen after.
George just lucky, I guess.
One day I looked up
and there you were
No people here to look stupid for.
Just George.
Like a simple question
looking for an answer
Now I am a whale
Listening to some inner call
Swimming blindly to throw
myself upon your shore
What if I don't find you
when I have landed
Would you leave me here to die
on your shore, stranded
Think I know why
the dog howls at the moon
I think I know why
the dog howls at the moon
I sing dela, dela
When I'm with you
I burn for you
I've been waiting for you
all my life
Hoping for a miracle
I've been waiting day and night
Day and night
I've been waiting for you all my life
Waiting for redemption
I've been waiting day and night
I burn for you
And so it came to pass
that George of the Jungle...
attended his first co-ed dance.
But his rapturous rendezvous with the
urban heiress was to be short-lived...
as the very next morning, Kwame and
his men were drawing dangerously close.
That is, dangerously close to shoving
a coconut up Lyle's sleeping bag.
That's it! I've had it!
I am the richest, smartest, handsomest
guy here, so I get to go first.
There's an elephant around here.
Bad guy falls in poop.
Classical element of physical comedy.
Now comes the part where we throw
our heads back and laugh. Ready?
Those were nowhere near
properly digested.
In case anybody's
wondering, I'm okay.
Have you cleaned my lighter yet?
Come on, come on.
That was Ursula.
Did you hear that?
She's alive. Ursula...
Why don't you bring on a brass band
while you're at it, you nit?
We gotta be stealthy here, right?
Stealthy. Right.
Party time.
We'll take it from here.
Get off!
It's him!
Hey, it's a dude. I told you
there weren't no white ape.
You dragged me all the way
up here to look at some guy
in a leopard-skin bikini.
- If I wanted to see that,
I could've stayed in Miami.
- Wait a second.
The white ape is a man?
Let me at him.
Hang on. Could you, uh, see
if he's dangerous?
Here, boy!
Where's my little doggy?
I've got a feeling he's not.
Okay. I'll go first.
If he gets aggressive,
I'll scare him off with this.
- I thought that was a lighter.
- It is a lighter,
but he doesn't know that.
Ursula, it's me.
Lyle. Your man.
I've come for you. Are you okay?
- Lyle, what are you doing here?
- Thank God.
Mushy bear, you're safe.
I don't believe it!
Oh, I was so afraid
for your safety.
Lyle! Don't get all smoochy
and disgusting with me, okay?
I remember what you did
when that lion came.
What are you talking about?
I was fighting the lion the whole time.
You were just so terrified
you don't remember.
- I remember George,
that's who I remember.
- George?
Look over there.
What do you see?
- An elephant.
- But what has the elephant got?
- Fleas.
- Ivory! White gold.
Listen, Ursula, I have no idea what
you're talking about. Can we just go?
- George!
- Ursula!
Run, Shep!
Run for your life!
Did that monkey just speak?
That monkey just spoke.
- I knew it.
- He talked.
- Shoot it now.
- Huh?
With the tranquillizer gun, idiot!
That ape's worth a fortune.
Stop, or I'll shoot!
- No!
- No!
Whew! Okay, kids, let's settle down
and review the important information.
Lyle is a big doofus.
Poor George was really shot...
but can't die because,
let's face it, he's the hero.
So, the naturally concerned
and preternaturally wealthy
Ursula Stanhope...
whisked George off on a private jet
bound for the country of his birth...
where he would get the finest
medical treatment available.
I'm gonna get you the finest
medical treatment available.
As for those pesky, pernicious
and putrid poachers, Max and Thor...
they awaited their fate
in the Bujumbura jail.
You two, out.
- Acquitted?
- No, deported.
Meanwhile, Kwame and his men faced
the next-to-impossible task...
of picking out George's assailant
from a line-up of the usual suspects.
Too short. Too sweaty.
Wait a second! That's the guy.
That's the guy who shot him.
- I never forget a face.
- Me?
No, Max. Forget about it. I do not want
to listen to any more of your ideas.
You'll like this one. We're gonna steal
Georgie-boy's talking ape.
- You mean, back up the mountain?
- Thor, that ape is our ticket...
out of poaching
and into show business.
- No.
- Think about it. We got a talking ape.
What do Siegfried and Roy have?
- Sequins?
- Exactly.
Get ready for room service,
mate, and girls.
We're gettin' our ape
and going to Vegas.
By next weekend,
we'll be headlining at the Tropicana.
- Nobody is gonna stop us.
- Right.
George of the Jungle
must be halfway to Frisco by now.
Ah, but the plotting poachers
were only half correct...
for at that very moment, our handsome
hero was all the way to San Francisco.
- Yes, Mother, I'm safe.
- You're sure you didn't
catch dengue fever?
No, Mother, I did not
catch dengue fever.
- Well, how's your temperature?
- Normal.
- Colour of your tongue?
- Pink.
- What about your hmm-hmm?
- Regular.
Now, Lyle.
How is my darling future son-in-law?
Lyle is...
He's happy to be home, Mom.
Could you hold on one second?
George, please don't call any animals
into the car, okay? Thanks.
Mom? You there?
Mom, hold on. I'm losing you again.
George. George. No.
Are you paying any attention?
This is important.
No. I know it's important. Geo-Geo...
George. George. Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot.
This faster than riding big,
great, peanut-loving poochie Shep.
Love you, Mom. Gotta go.
Bye. Watch out for that...
So, what do you
think of my jungle?
This very high tree house.
Good place to call friends from.
Sound carry.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
The neighbours.
- Give it a rest!
- We're ten storeys up, George.
I don't think the animals
can make it up here.
Oh, sure.
George know that.
George know that.
You must be tired. I'll, um...
make the couch up for you
to sleep in the living room.
Oh, no. George sleep here
in tree house.
Okay. Good night.
Sleep sweet, Ursula.
Sleep sweet, George.
Well, Ursula's fiance
is in prison...
and there's a jungle man
sleeping on her balcony.
- She could use a best friend right now.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- I got here as fast as I could.
- Where is he?
- He's under the waterf...
He's in the shower.
Not any more.
- George.
- Oh. Bad waterfall.
First water get hot, then George slip
on this strange, yellow rock. Oh!
- Hi. George of Jungle.
- Charmed, I'm sure.
Um, take this big book.
Whoop! Cover the booty,
get into decent clothes.
- Sorry, Betsy.
- Bye.
- No problem.
- Okay.
- I see why they made him
king of the jungle.
Betsy, I am
in trouble here, okay?
How am I gonna tell my parents
that my fiance's in an African jail...
and that I brought home
a jungle man?
You are totally stuck
on George, huh?
No, I am not!
- Can I have him then?
- Okay, let's think. Think, think, think.
Think, think, think, think,
think, think, think, think.
What am I gonna do about tomorrow?
Tomorrow is your engagement party,
and unless they give day passes...
out of Bujumbura Jail,
Lyle is not likely to attend.
So tell 'em the truth and don't
worry about it and take George.
- He can back up your story. Right?
- Yeah. All right.
So I'll tell my dad
first thing in the morning.
Make it second thing. First thing, I
suggest you buy jungle man some clothes.
Nice butt flap.
Being of a conservative mind
regarding gender roles...
Ursula Stanhope
wasted no time...
in taking George of the Jungle
to a fine haberdasher.
- And this is Neiman Marcus.
- Whoo! They have big, shiny cave.
Hello. Would you like
to sample our new fragrance?
Thank you.
Later, in the men's department, after
discovering his long-lost brothers...
the jungle king was pleased to find
he looked pretty good in Armani.
Pretty darn good.
Watch out, man!
Why everyone run around crazy,
like antelope in mating season?
They're just trying to make a living.
It's... different kind
of jungle here, George.
It's survival of the fittest.
Dog eat dog.
- "Dog eat dog"...Dog eat dog here?
- No, that's not what I meant.
George never bring Shep here.
Uh-uh. Never.
Every story gets to have a really big
coincidence, and here's ours.
Who should see them walking down
the street but Ursula's meddling mother?
Uh, yes, uh, Lyle Van de Groot,
- I'm sorry. He's not back from Africa.
- He's not?
No. I'm sorry.
Meanwhile, back on Ape Mountain...
George's friends were going positively
ga-ga from missing the jungle king.
Oh, look at this.
It's ruined. Ruined!
Shep, come here at once.
Come on!
How many times do I have to tell you?
My violin bow is not a chew toy!
Bad dog!
And you! Out of my sight,
you feathered fool.
No! Not on the tree house!
I'll smack you...
Ursula, it's Mother.
Pick up the phone...
and tell me who that man was
I saw you strolling with today.
And where is Lyle?
We must discuss the engagement party.
I know you're there, Ursula.
Pick up the phone and tell me
why you have been avoiding me.
Pick up the phone!
Well, I think that
was an overreaction.
Just make sure you stay here
while I'm at work...
and you can watch TV
and eat and relax.
And I'll be back as soon as I can.
Just stay here.
"Stay here"? George is king
of the jungle. No four walls built
by modern man can contain him.
Not true. George have every intention
of doing exactly what Ursula say.
- Really? Is that so?
- For a while.
And at that very moment,
Betsy and Ursula were on their way to
break the news about Lyle to her father.
- Good luck, kiddo.
- Surprise!
Ursula, welcome home,
and happy engagement day.
Chock Full O' Nuts
The heavenly coffee
- The coffee that brings you together.
- When you're in love
Now George understand. George get
coffee, then Ursula want George.
So the low has moved offshore.
High pressure's built a ridge in.
The weather
is absolutely gorgeous.
- If you're not outside, you oughta be!
- Who, me?
- I mean you.
- Oh.
And so, jazzed on java...
George of the Jungle made his way
into the city by the bay.
Quickly taking to tourism,
the jungle king enjoyed...
the first drive-through
dining of his life...
and strolled the city streets until
he found something so scintillating...
- he had to say:
- Ooh!
But nothing excited
the jungle king more...
than the sight of the biggest
rope bridge he had ever seen.
Ooh. Yeah.
- Help!
- Ooh.
Somebody help!
- To swing or not to swing?
- Help!
As the king of the jungle
quickly calculated the angle
and velocity of his next big swing...
Ursula felt like jumping
off a bridge herself.
I feel so guilty.
I don't know what I'm going to do.
First thing: I suggest you tell your
father what you came here to tell him.
- Hi, Daddy.
- Hi, honey. Take a look at this.
The most remarkable thing
is happening on the Bay Bridge.
...where strong winds
have carried him to the Bay Bridge.
Our own Valerie Devlin
is live on the scene. Valerie?
Thank you, Terilyn.
We do have a breaking story...
- at the Bay Bridge...
- Help!
- Where a parasailor dangles...
- helplessly, 500 feet above the water.
- Please! Hurry up! Help!
There's no word on who
this lone daredevil is.
- That's George.
- He appears to have some kind
of rope in his hand.
- He might be preparing to swing on it.
- I gotta go.
Excuse me, sir.
I have to get on this boat.
Hey, fella. George of Jungle.
Need a vine?
Hey, thanks a lot, man.
G-Get me out of this stuff, huh?
- Thanks, man.
- Oh, don't mention it.
King of jungle only here to help!
- George!
- Ursula! Ow!
Watch out for that...
- George!
- Ursula!
- What are you doing? Are you okay?
- You just saved that man's life!
- George just lucky, I guess.
Ooh. This coffee stuff
really work good. of the most daring rescues
ever recorded live on television.
This is Valerie Devlin reporting
to you from under the Bay Bridge.
Back to you, Terilyn.
You know, they say the city by the bay
is the most romantic in the world...
and it looks as though
there might be a little romance
unfolding under the Bay Bridge.
- We'll be back in a moment.
- Ohh.
Meanwhile, back in the jungle...
There's five stinkin' apes out there.
Which one are we takin' to Vegas?
- The one who's playing chess.
- Checkmate.
- Yes!
- Sweet dreams, banana breath.
- Grab him!
Tookie. Go find George.
Let's get him in the cage
while he's still under. Come on.
As the pesky poachers
grunted and groaned...
pushing and pulling
the ponderous primate along...
the trusty Tookie-Tookie bird
was already winging to the rescue...
making a bird-line
for San Francisco...
where George of the Jungle was trying
to give the heiress Ursula...
the courage to face her parents...
by helping her discover
the juju within.
- Make jungle call.
Then you'll feel brave.
- No. I can't.
- Come on. Big breath.
Here. Support voice.
- N-No. No, no, no.
- Ursula, please? Pl... Please?
- No, no!
- I can't do it.
- Big. Brave. Queen of jungle.
Come on, Ursula.
- Wow.
- Not bad for beginner.
- Hi, Ursula.
- Emboldened with jungle juju...
- Hi.
Ursula Stanhope went inside
to break the news to her parents,
who took it extremely well.
Mother, Daddy,
I love you both very much.
I have something
very important to tell you...
and I hope you'll understand.
- I don't want to marry Lyle any more.
- We understand, dear.
Just kidding.
- The young Miss Stanhope
proceeded to spill the beans...
- So, anyway, I went to the jungle...
very quickly...
until she got to
the important part at the end.
Then Lyle shot him. So Lyle
is in jail and George is with me...
and I don't want to marry
Lyle any more.
I knew it. It's that swinging man
from the bridge.
I saw you smooching on TV.
- Mother, we weren't smooching...
- How could you do this to me?
Don't you realize the calibre of people
who are going to be here?
- Calm down, Beatrice, and let her say...
- I thought we would be
introducing them...
to Lyle Van de Groot, not some
wild man you found in the jungle.
Beatrice, this is supposed to be
her wedding, not yours.
- So?
- Beatrice, I know you're upset...
and so am I, but we can't force her
to marry someone against her will.
- Why not?
- Mom. Dad.
I'm ready to go out there
and apologize to everybody
and tell them what really happened.
Absolutely not!
As far as I'm concerned, you...
you caught one of those viruses.
Yes, one of those dreadful
jungle viruses...
that get nice girls all confused.
And if Lyle survives that
awful jail, you will simply
have to kiss and make up.
As for this evening, we will hold
our heads high and we will carry on.
Now, darling, where is that charming
young friend of yours?
- Well, where is he?
- I don't know.
He's around here someplace.
- Well, find him. We haven't got
all day. Oh, Ursula, look!
- Oh, great!
How wonderful!
And look at Richard's exquisite
figurines of you and darling Lyle.
George, watch out for that...
Mom. Dad. This is George.
Hello, Mr and Mrs Ursula.
How do you do?
It is always such a pleasure
to see you, Mr Mayor.
And, you know, it's so nice
to get away from City Hall...
and be around some normal people
for a change.
Well, we are perfectly normal,
I assure you... in an exceptional way,
of course.
Of course.
A-And what about this guy, Lyle?
You know, I'd really like to meet
the man you deem good enough
to marry your daughter.
Oh, well, unfortunately Lyle
is busy at the moment...
uh, tending to some legal affairs.
- Some pate, Mr Mayor?
- You know, I never touch that stuff.
- Oh.
- I had a lovely time.
- Would you excuse us, please?
- Excuse me, Dr Goldblum.
It's 7:30. Do you know where
your jungle man is?
So this is what you were doing
in the jungle. Clever girl.
Yeah. Um, he swung me on vines
and fed me coconut milk.
- I knew it.
- He's not a real meat loaf, is he?
No. I mean,
he's not brainy...
in that doctor, lawyer,
banker way...
but he has something else.
- He has a...
- Sensual intelligence.
"Sensual intelligence."
- Wow.
- Oh, my God.
What is it with chicks
and horses, huh?
George, how are you this evening?
Pretty sharp threads there,
uh... George, right?
- Yeah. Where're you based?
- The jungle.
I hear ya.
We cut our teeth in New York also.
Eh, you considering a position
with Stanhope? That could be fruitful.
Fruitful? This place not so fruitful.
Nobody here have big coconuts.
I wa... Oh.
Would you mind
stepping outside with me...
Thank you so much...
for just a moment?
- Hello, Beatrice.
- Hello, Ella.
Well, we haven't been friends
for very long, George...
but I already think I know
something about you.
- Oh?
- You are in love with my daughter.
- Oh, Mrs Ursula not so dumb.
- George.
My concern, however, is that Ursula
seems to reciprocate your feelings...
and that does present
a problem to me.
You see,
you and Ursula together...
would be unbefitting
her social stature.
You see? Let me put it in a way
you might understand.
Where you come from...
zebras marry zebras
and leopards marry leopards.
Stripes with stripes,
spots with spots.
Well, Ursula is a stripe
and you are a spot...
one which I intend to have removed
as soon as possible.
So you no want Ursula
to love George.
I would rather have my tongue nailed to
this table every morning at breakfast.
- That hurt.
- Not as much as you will
if you do anything...
to screw up my daughter's marriage
to Lyle Van de Groot.
When Lyle returns, this wedding
will proceed as planned.
If you do anything to upset that...
I will remove your reason
for wearing a loin cloth.
Steak tartare, Mrs Stanhope?
Oh, no, no. Thank you.
I've had quite enough protein for today.
Have a pleasant evening,
Mr Jungle.
Tookie? Tookie!
George so happy to see Tookie.
Ape kidnapped?
Ape ape-napped?
George save Ape!
Well, of course he went back to the
jungle. Where else would go... the Hague?
But why would he leave
without saying goodbye?
Well, personally I think he acted
rather sensibly. Showed good character.
He understands that he belongs there,
you belong here.
It's really all a question
of stripes and spots.
What? Oh, no.
You got to him.
Mother, what did you say?
I simply said that if he
really cared for you...
he'd leave you alone and let you
get on with your life and marry Lyle.
- I am not marrying Lyle, Mother.
- Beatrice, perhaps we should just...
Arthur! Now, Ursula darling,
don't be ridiculous.
There's a big difference
between marriageable material
and a fling in the jungle.
"A fling in the jungle"?
"A fling in the jungle."
Who says I had
a fling in the jungle?
You don't think you can
fool your mother, do you?
You've been head over heels for that ape
ever since you brought him here.
Now, Ursula, that kind of love
is fleeting. You'll get over it.
- Did you just say "love"?
- No.
- You did.
- Ursula.
- You're right.
- Don't say it.
- I love him. I'm outta here.
Ursula, you can't love him.
Arthur, say something.
- Be careful out there, honey.
- What?
- Goodbye, Daddy.
- I love you.
- Wha...
- I love you, Mom. Thank you.
- Ursula... Arthur, do something!
- What would you have me do?
- There's obviously no stopping her.
- Oh, God.
- Ursula!
- God, that woman's a pain in the ass.
halfway across the world...
another ass was feeling pain...
as an ape named Ape
was caged in a cage...
hoping to hear
the jungle king's awesome...
Hey, I'm pretty good at that...
and wondering
if he would ever come.
But the motion-sick mammal
needn't have moaned...
for that defender of the innocent,
protector of the weak...
and all-around good guy
George of the Jungle...
was closer than he knew.
Next time George get bigger box.
Oh! Bad luck.
- Did you hear something?
- What?
- I heard a noise.
- Shut up and push!
Oh, I think I chipped a tooth.
- Oh, Thor, you're disgusting.
- God, that wasn't me.
Not me.
- I'm hungry.
- Oh, shut up.
You've been yakkin' for 2 days straight,
and I'm gettin' mad enough to...
You know, you really should
work on your anger.
Have you tried Brankowski's
"Cage the Rage" technique?
Don't let him get to you, Thor.
He's just an ape.
That's a fine way to talk
to your meal ticket.
You keep that up, it's liable
to affect my stage performance.
Give him a banana, Thor.
It won't be long now.
That's what you said yesterday.
This trail's taking us
to the middle of nowhere.
The sign at the trail head said
"Short cut to Ape River."
Now, why would it say "short cut"
if it wasn't a...
Wait a minute.
Maybe it's a fake, a decoy trail.
Very good, Max.
Actually, the trail is a fake.
It circles Ape Mountain six times before
heading right back to the tree house.
- Ohh! Oh, I knew we was lost.
- Don't listen to him, Thor.
He's just tryin' to trick us,
lead us off the short cut...
so we take twice as long
on the regular trail.
We're already taking twice as long!
Are you gonna let a monkey
make a monkey out of ya?
- What?
- Duh!
Let's go. If he tells us the short cut
leads to the tree house...
then that's exactly
where it doesn't lead.
- Poor ape-napped brother.
- Careful.
Max, look.
We're back at the tree house.
Well, I tried, but you fellas
are just too smart for me.
- Oh, no!
- "Oh, no" was right,
for the exhausted ape-nappers had...
Hey! Why don't you say something
constructive for a change,
like what we should do now.
- Because I don't like you.
- Well, I hate you, you snotty son of a...
I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
Having some fun now, hmm?
- Thor, were you fighting
with the narrator?
- Well, he started it.
- Did not.
- You did too!
- Did not.
- You did too!
- Did not!
- You did too!
- Thor, stop it!
- Ohh.
That's it. I'm not draggin'
this thing another inch.
- What are you doing? Get back there
and work. Where are you going?
- You wretched little weasel.
Aren't you the little weasel,
you big brontosaurus?
- Let's take care of him.
- Huh? Huh?
Why didn't you come sooner?
Why Ape have little stars
around head?
George, remember
everything I taught you about
Queensberry rules and fighting fair?
- Uh-huh.
- Well, now's a good time to forget it.
Let's finish him off.
- Oh, I can't breathe, Max.
- Let it out, Thor. Let it out.
Right, jungle boy.
- Huh?
- Huh?
- Take this!
- Stop it! Ape!
Get it off!
Get it off of me, Max!
All right!
Shep, look out!
George good teacher.
George. George.
I came all this way to tell you that...
Ursula talk later.
George busy now.
- What?
- Fella got toucan on can.
I know.
Good show, George.
And you too, Tookie.
Oh, my hero.
Did I just say that?
- George. Over here, George!
- Ape, sit tight. George be right back.
Oh, I say.
Now George can talk.
What Ursula come back to say?
Only that I know in my heart...
that I really, truly...
- Haven't seen the light yet.
- Lyle.
- Lyle?
- Yes, Lyle.
For the venal Van de Groot had escaped
from the Bujumbura jail...
and joined an obscure cult
on the shores of Lake Tanganyika...
which had empowered him with
a peculiar piece of parchment.
- What are you doing here?
- Surprised, my little cupcake?
You see, I'm now
an mail-order minister...
ordained the Church of Celestial
Power and Light, Incorporated...
capable of performing legally binding
marriage ceremonies anywhere.
- Lyle, I'm not marrying you.
- Actually, you are.
- Come on, let's go.
Come along, my little African queen.
- George.
Now George really mad.
George tear off your...
- At ease, jungle boy.
- Everybody freeze now!
Operation completed
as ordered, sir.
Thank you, Gunnar, Gunter,
Hans, Jan and Phil.
No hard feelings, stone belly.
The best man won.
That's all.
I should say, the guy who brought
mercenaries won. That's all.
Okay, honey, you ready to go? I got
a boat waitin' to take us to Bujumbura.
- Come on.
- George!
- Ursula.
- Come on.
- No!
- Don't go that way!
- Go that way. No...
- See you later.
- George! Stop it! Stop it!
- Ursula!
- Lyle, let go of me.
- Come on. Come on. Come on.
Work every time.
Good work, brother apes.
Now listen very carefully to George.
Let 'er rip, Shep.
Stop it! Stop it, Lyle!
- Come on.
- Let go. Stop it! You're such a jerk!
Come on in there!
Come here!
You know, I forgive you, and I'm
willing to give you yet another chance.
Lyle, you don't where you're go...
Where's George?
You see? I told you
I'd have a boat waiting.
Okay, then. All righty.
Reverend Lyle
ready to perform the ceremony.
Do you, Ursula Stanhope,
take me, Lyle Van de Groot...
- to be your lawful wedded husband?
- Get a grip, Lyle.
- Lyle.
- Yeah, honey?
- Lyle?
- Oh, my God!
Thanks, Tookie.
This biggest swing
in jungle history.
Will hurt very much,
but George have to do it.
- George!
- What the...
- This gonna hurt.
- George, watch out for that tree!
George not feel so good.
Oh, thank God we've made it.
Say "I do," Ursula.
Ah, that's it. We're married.
Now to look at my bride.
No! No!
George, what I came here to say
was that I love you.
- Ursula love George?
- So much.
George love Ursula too.
And so George of the Jungle received
the first kiss of his life...
that came from
neither elephant nor ape.
And on the following new moon...
Ursula Stanhope finally got
the simple wedding she had hoped for...
as the San Francisco heiress
and the king of the jungle...
joined their hearts forever
in wedded bliss.
- The rings!
- The rings.
The rings? Tookie.
Arthur, I wish you'd do something
about all these monkeys.
I feel like Jane Goodall.
Madam, I knew Jane Goodall,
and you are no Jane Goodall.
Listenin' to some inner call
Swimmin' blindly
to throw myself upon your shore
I think I know why
the dog howls at the moon
I think I know why
the dog howls at the moon
And I sing, dela, dela
When I'm with you
I burn for you
I been waiting for you
all my life
Hoping for a miracle
I been waiting day and night
Day and night
I been waiting for you
all my life
Waiting for redemption
I been waiting day and night
I burn for you
- I love you.
- Good boy.
And so ends our tale
of that defender of the innocent...
protector of the weak
and all-around good guy...
George of the Jungle.
A noble king,
his beautiful queen...
and their nimble young heir
to the jungle throne.
George, watch out for that...
I know what you're thinking...
How does a baby raised by an ape...
grow up to be king of the jungle,
find his queen...
and live happily ever after?
George just lucky, I guess.
George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Lives a life that's free
Wait a moment! Wait, wait, wait! Don't
you want to know what happened to me?
And now the end is near
And so I face the final curtain
My friends
I'll say it clear
I'll state my case
Of which I'm certain
I've lived a life that's full
I've travelled
each and every highway
- And more, much more than this
- Whoo
I did it my way
There were times
I'm sure you knew
When I bit off
more than I could chew
But through it all
- When there was doubt
- Doubt
I ate it up and spit it out
I faced it all
and I stood tall
And did it my way
Doo, doo, doo
George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Lives a life that's free
Watch out for that tree
When he gets in a scrape
he makes his escape
With help from his friend
an ape named Ape
And his elephant Shep
can fetch a log
He's man's best friend
He's George's dog
He's George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Friend to you and me
Watch out for that tree
Hear him holler
Swing and sing
All the animals come
to the jungle king
So grab a vine
and swing in time
If you slam a tree
just pay no mind
Like George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
George, George
George of the Jungle
Swing from tree to tree
Watch out for that tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Lives a life that's free
Watch out for that tree
Left in the wild was a baby
with a smile named George
Who stayed for quite a while
And George grew up
in the trees above
When Ursula found him
they found love
She took him to the city
Took him straight downtown
But the concrete bliss
brought poor George down
So it's back to the jungle
for a wedding in the green
For the king and queen
of the animal scene
George, George
George of the Jungle
Strong as he can be
Watch out for that tree
Watch out for that...
Bang! Ooh! Tree
George, George
George of the Jungle
Watch out for that tree
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you
the king of the jungle.