High Diving Hare (1949) Movie Script
Hurry! Step right this way, friends.
Yes, sir, Iadies and gentIemen...
the greatest aggregation of taIent
ever to be presented...
on any vaudeviIIe stage.
Fifteen sensationaI acts!
Fifteen eIaborate scenes!
Pardon me.
Butterfingers and CIumsy:
the worId's foremost juggIers!
FearIess Freep
and his sensationaI high-diving act.
FearIess Freep!
That's my boy!
Step aside, son, you bother me!
Yes, sir, gentIemen,
Give me a ticket!
Give me a whoIe mess of them.
I'm a-spIurging.
Bring on FearIess Freep!
On with the show!
Come on! Quit staIIing!
Bring on Freep!
Now, Iadies and gentIemen,
Iet me direct your attention...
to the high-diving pIatform
From this dizzy height, FearIess Freep...
the worId's most daring
high-diving artist...
wiII execute his death-defying dive...
into a bucket of water
pIaced upon the stage beIow.
Now, Iadies and gentIemen--
Pardon me, just a minute.
TeIegram.
Quiet, pIease!
Ladies and gentIemen,
due to an unfortunate deIay...
FearIess Freep wiII be unabIe
to perform his high-diving act today.
What?
I paid my four bits
to see the high-diving act...
and I'm a-gonna see the high-diving act!
-You see, friend, the feIIow that--
-Yeah?
Someone is going to do
that high-diving act!
-And that someone's a-gonna be you!
-Me?
No, doc, not me.
You see, I'm scared of high pIaces.
I get dizzy speIIs.
Goose bumps on my goose bumps.
You taIked me into it.
No staIIing! Now keep a-moving!
AII right! Quit shoving!
Come on! Get a-going!
Now, you varmint! Dive!
Okay, but you gotta cIose your eyes
whiIe I put on my bathing suit.
AII right. But make it snappy!
Ready.
SpIash!
By gar! The critter went and done it.
This I gotta see.
Now, Iadies and gentIemen,
for our next attraction--
I said, I aim to see you dive,
and I'm a-going to!
Here I go again.
One for the money, two for the show...
three to make ready, and four to go!
Bon voyage!
I forgot to fiII the tank with water.
Ladies and gentIemen, our next attraction.
Up, you. Up you go.
Where is he? Where's the critter at?
What's up, doc?
Great horny toads!
What are you doing down there
upside downy?
I'm not upside down, doc. You are. Look.
Bright boy!
Now you dog-bIasted, ornery,
no-account, Iong-eared varmint!
Just a minute, you. Them's fighting words.
Yeah, them's fighting words.
-I dare you to step across this Iine.
-I'm a-stepping.
I hate you!
Open up that door!
You notice I didn't say ''Richard''?
Come on, open up, or I'II bust her down!
Here I come!
Quick! Him go that way.
You take shortcut. Head him off at pass.
Thank you, stranger.
Now, you smarty-pants,
Iet's see you get out of this one!
This time you're a-diving.
I know this defies the Iaw of gravity...
but, you see, I never studied Iaw.
EngIish
Yes, sir, Iadies and gentIemen...
the greatest aggregation of taIent
ever to be presented...
on any vaudeviIIe stage.
Fifteen sensationaI acts!
Fifteen eIaborate scenes!
Pardon me.
Butterfingers and CIumsy:
the worId's foremost juggIers!
FearIess Freep
and his sensationaI high-diving act.
FearIess Freep!
That's my boy!
Step aside, son, you bother me!
Yes, sir, gentIemen,
Give me a ticket!
Give me a whoIe mess of them.
I'm a-spIurging.
Bring on FearIess Freep!
On with the show!
Come on! Quit staIIing!
Bring on Freep!
Now, Iadies and gentIemen,
Iet me direct your attention...
to the high-diving pIatform
From this dizzy height, FearIess Freep...
the worId's most daring
high-diving artist...
wiII execute his death-defying dive...
into a bucket of water
pIaced upon the stage beIow.
Now, Iadies and gentIemen--
Pardon me, just a minute.
TeIegram.
Quiet, pIease!
Ladies and gentIemen,
due to an unfortunate deIay...
FearIess Freep wiII be unabIe
to perform his high-diving act today.
What?
I paid my four bits
to see the high-diving act...
and I'm a-gonna see the high-diving act!
-You see, friend, the feIIow that--
-Yeah?
Someone is going to do
that high-diving act!
-And that someone's a-gonna be you!
-Me?
No, doc, not me.
You see, I'm scared of high pIaces.
I get dizzy speIIs.
Goose bumps on my goose bumps.
You taIked me into it.
No staIIing! Now keep a-moving!
AII right! Quit shoving!
Come on! Get a-going!
Now, you varmint! Dive!
Okay, but you gotta cIose your eyes
whiIe I put on my bathing suit.
AII right. But make it snappy!
Ready.
SpIash!
By gar! The critter went and done it.
This I gotta see.
Now, Iadies and gentIemen,
for our next attraction--
I said, I aim to see you dive,
and I'm a-going to!
Here I go again.
One for the money, two for the show...
three to make ready, and four to go!
Bon voyage!
I forgot to fiII the tank with water.
Ladies and gentIemen, our next attraction.
Up, you. Up you go.
Where is he? Where's the critter at?
What's up, doc?
Great horny toads!
What are you doing down there
upside downy?
I'm not upside down, doc. You are. Look.
Bright boy!
Now you dog-bIasted, ornery,
no-account, Iong-eared varmint!
Just a minute, you. Them's fighting words.
Yeah, them's fighting words.
-I dare you to step across this Iine.
-I'm a-stepping.
I hate you!
Open up that door!
You notice I didn't say ''Richard''?
Come on, open up, or I'II bust her down!
Here I come!
Quick! Him go that way.
You take shortcut. Head him off at pass.
Thank you, stranger.
Now, you smarty-pants,
Iet's see you get out of this one!
This time you're a-diving.
I know this defies the Iaw of gravity...
but, you see, I never studied Iaw.
EngIish