Recess: School's Out (2001) Movie Script
[ Kazoos ]
Hey, hows it going, Frank ?
Not so good. I cant seem to get
this photon channelerworking.
Well, youd better
figure it out.
- The colonel wants to show
the system to the top brass next month.
- I know, I know.
[ Men Shouting ]
-[LoudBang]
- What was that ?
- Whats that sound out there ?
- [ Alarm Blaring ]
Its a break-in !
Erase the access code !
X-Y-4--
[ Gasps ]
[ Both Groan ]
[Alarm Continues
Blaring, Stops]
All clear.
Neatly done, Fernlick.
- Its, uh, Fenwick, sir.
- Oh.
- Are they dead ?
- No, sir. Merely unconscious.
Good, good.
You know how I hate violence.
Mmm. Nice shine.
-Uh, what next, sir ?
-Well, obviously, we establish our base.
- And where will that be ?
- The last place on Earth theyd look.
A place called...
3rd Street School.
Last day ofschool sale,
boys and girls.
Getyour celebratory
contraband right here.
Shaving cream, T.P., goofy string,
maps ofthe teachers houses.
Ill take one ofthem maps,
Hustler Kid.
Hey, Diggers, lets party.
Cant now. Gotta finish filling up
our holes before the end ofthe day.
Wont be able to dig em up nextyear
ifwe dont fill em now.
[ Spitting ]
Hey ! Big kids bury me !
Oops.
I, King Bob, in my last official
act before entering middle school,
hereby anoint this boy here
King Freddie the Second.
Mayyou boss around
all ofthe kids with fairness.
The king has graduated !
Long live the king !
- [ Cheering ]
- [ Hail to the Chief ]
Elbow up !
Eyes forward !
You call that kazoo playing ?
- Ah, ceremony.
- Im, like, moved, AshleyA.
Saywhatyou want about their
personal lives, Ashley Q
The royals have such style.
Keep em comin !
Lets go !
Ms. Finster, the kids are practically
mad with last-day-of-school fever !
Ofcourse they are, Randall.
Theyre animals living by pure instinct.
Ive got a list
ofinfractions a mile long:
The Diggers
hit a water main,
- the kindergarteners
are feasting on paste,
- Never mind, Randall.
Hustler Kid is, uh--
Did you say never mind ?
Thats right, Randall. What Ive
got here is bigger, much bigger.
All this year Ive been holding
back on the ice cream, hiding it
from all those little savages.
Just look at it, Randall.
Im counting 1 00, maybe 200 cases ofit.
What areyou going to do
with all those ice creams ?
Sell em back to the district,
ofcourse.
Think ofall the chalk
and erasers we can get.
But, Ms. Finster,
Ive got dirt on everybody.
Well, everybody except
Detweiler and his pals.
Come to think ofit,
I havent seen those guys anywhere.
Ah, forget about em, Randall.
Theres nothing T.J. Detweiler and his
hooligan friends can do to stop me now.
Well, that should do it.
Theres enough here for everyone.
Good. Then its party time.
Kids ofthe playground !
I giveyou ice cream !
Pull !
[ Cheering ]
- Ice cream !
- Choco-pops !
- Fudge bars !
Fudgsicle !
My ice cream !
Stop it !
Stop it, I say !
You little monsters
are in trouble now !
-Just waitll Principal Prickly
finds out about this !
-Attention, students !
- This is Principal Prickly talking.
- Ooh, that was fast.
Some ofyou may have noticed
ice cream on the playground.
I willnotstandforthis. This
ice creamshouldbe eatenimmediately.
Huh ?
[ Cheering ]
In addition, I wantyou all to ignore
Ms. Finster, no matterwhat she says...
about ice cream
or anything else.
- [ Cheering Continues ]
- [ Muttering ] This cant be happening.
Furthermore, I want to inform you
all that I have a fat, saggy butt...
which I like to scratch
every hour on the hour.
Also, I want to apologize
to all ofyou...
for being such a mean principal,
taking away hall passes,
giving guys recess detention,
refusing toacceptsicKnotes
just causeitdoesntlooK
liKeaguysmomssignature,
maKingKidsstandat the wall
forten wholeminutes, withnobreaK!
Man, I feel ashamed ofmyselffor all
the terrible, rotten things Ive done.
And nextyear,
I promise to--
Why, Principal Prickly, sir,
what a surprise.
Why doyou do this to me, Detweiler ?
Doyou enjoy tormenting me ?
- Doyou hate me ?
- On the contrary, sir, I have
the utmost respect foryou.
Dont be smart with me, boy. All year
long youve been pushing me, testing me.
- I dont know whatyou mean, sir.
- Oh, really ?
How about the timeyou convinced
the F.B.I. I was a Chinese agent
and got me arrested ?
You were giving us a speech on
personal hygiene. You had to be stopped.
How about the time
you forged my signature
and ordered a motorboat for the school ?
It was for the kindergarteners.
Owning a boats always been
kind ofa dream oftheirs.
Ive had enough ofyour pranks.
This time Im really gonna
throw the book atyou.
With all due respect, sir, youd better
get throwing, causeyoure out oftime.
- Huh ?
- Its the last day ofschool, sir.
Ive only got 20 more seconds
offourth grade left. Look.
In some ways, people,
this day is a bummer for me.
But in otherways
its the ultimate high,
because every milestone thatyou kids
pass is another step towards--
- Uh, Miss Grotke ?
- Yes, Spinelli ?
I dont mean
to interrupt, but--
Oh, yes !
Be my guest.
[ Kids In Unison ]
Six, five, four, three, two, one--
-[BellRings]
- [ Cheering ]
- Whoo !
- Whoo-hoo !
[ Laughing ]
Yeah !
[ Together]
Scandalous !
Callingoutaroundthe world
Areyouready forabrand-newbeat
-Summershere
- You eat paste ! You eat paste !
Andthe timeis right
fordancinin thestreet
-[Stops]
- Hey ! No running in the halls !
Yeah, whats the big deal ?
Itsjust the end ofthe school year.
[ Together]
The end ofthe school year ?
- Whoo-hoo !
Itdoesntmatter
whatyou wear
- Whoo-hoo ! [ Laughing ]
-Justas long asyouare there
Girls, what shall we do with
the rest ofthis corn chowder ?
[ Sniffs ] Aw, leave it in the kettle.
Itll keep till September.
- [ All Laughing ]
- Theyllbe dancing
Dancing in thestreet
- Theyre dancinin thestreet
-Dancing in thestreet
Seeyou nextyear,
Principal Prickly.
Youd better do some
growing up this summer, young man.
[ Sighs ]
I hate myjob.
Therellbelaughin
singin
Andrecordsplayin
Dancinin thestreet
Look at those hooligans.
Actually, I think its a wonderful
expression offreedom andjoy.
Ill tell you a wonderful expression
offreedom andjoy.
Twelve weeks ofnothing but me at the
West Side GolfCourse, and no Detweiler.
I second that emotion, sir.
Man, Teej,
that prankwas sweet.
Yeah, you shouldve seen
Finsters face-- I thought
she was gonna blow a gasket.
Those limesicles were tasty.
A tasty beginning
to a tasty summer.
Twelve weeks ofnothing but
riding bikes, hanging out at the lake...
and T.P.-ing
the West Side GolfCourse.
Summervacation--
the ultimate recess.
Yeah, I cant wait
to get to baseball camp.
Baseball camp ?
What areyou talking about ?
Actually, Teej,
Im gonna be out oftown too.
Big-time Wrestling Federation
has this training camp,
and I gotta learn some new moves
ifIm ever gonna turn pro.
- But, Spinelli--
- Its military camp for me.
My dad says I need to
learn to be a leader.
I shall be attending
the Mt. Van Buren Space Camp.
- Dont wanna let those
science geeks get ahead ofme.
- Youre all going to camp ?
- Not me.
- Thank goodness.
The Young Voices Training Program
doesnt like the word camp.
They provide opportunities for aspiring
singers to train theirvoices...
in a rigorous
yet supportive setting.
But summers gonna be ruined.
What am I gonna do ? Play baseball
by myself? Watch reruns ? Read ?
Sorry, man, but we gotta
think about our futures.
Yeah, we cant waste the whole summer
Just fooling around like kids.
- But we are kids !
- Actually, as ofthe completion
offourth grade,
we are technically considered
pre-young adults.
And nextyear
we wont even be pre.
But--
[ Sighs ]
All right, lets make the most
ofthe time weve got left.
When doyou all leave ?
- First thing in the morning.
- Oh, man.
[Chattering]
Well, theres my bus.
- Better get going.
- Yeah, same here.
Bye, Teej.
Try to have some fun, okay ?
Dont worry, buddy.
Youll have a great time without us.
I dont know, Vince.
All my plans were made for six.
Dont tell meyou Ashleys
are going to baseball camp.
Eeew !
As if!
Cheerleading camp
is right across the lake. Duh !
I hope its a big lake.
[Horn HonKs]
Ah, space camp.
Wonder iftheyll
let us make craters.
Hey, Hustler Kid,
I didnt knowyou wrestled.
I dont.
Im pre-management.
Besides, my research tells me
that kids who wrestle trade
the most for contraband snacks.
Which reminds me--
Wanna buy a Winger-Dinger ?
All right, all the kindergarten
performers on the bus first.
-[AllShouting]
- Me ViKing !
Me Viking !
Me Viking ! Me Viking !
Bon voyage...
[ Adult Baritone ]
T.J.
[Applause]
Big kid sing good.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Well, Teej,
theres my transport.
Why dontyou come with ?
Military camps gonna be a blast !
Griswald, you maggot,
getyour fanny over here now !
Thanks, Gus, but I think Ill
stick it out at home this summer.
Okay, butyou dont know
whatyoure missing.
- Hiya, Captain Brad !
- I dont likeyou, Griswald.
I am notyour friend !
- Do I make myselfclear ?
- Yes, sir ! Not looking
for friendship, sir !
Good luck, Gus.
Youre gonna need it.
Man, this summers
gonna whomp.
Oneis
theloneliestnumber
Thatyoulleverdo
Two canbe
asbadas one
Its theloneliestnumber
since thenumberone
[ Bird Squawking ]
Nois
thesaddestexperience
YoulleverKnow
Yes, its
thesaddestexperience
YoulleverKnow
Cause one
is theloneliestnumber
Thatyoulleverdo
Oneis
theloneliestnumber
Whoa-ohh
worse than two
And so, the summer season
officially begins...
with kids all over the country
rushing offto camp.
In other news, the national
No Recess movement...
has hit a serious
stumbling block...
with the disappearance
ofits leader,
former Secretary of Education
Phillium Benedict.
Benedict, fired by the president
twoyears ago for his extremist views,
has recently been--
No recess ?
What a bunch ofhogwash.
[ Yawns ]
Morning, Mom. Morning, Dad.
Areyoujust getting up now ?
Geez, youre sleeping away
yourwhole vacation.
Why dontyou go play
with your friends ?
What friends ? The ones
who abandoned me and went to camp ?
Now, T.J., I know there are
other boys around this summer.
Mrs. Ween says Randall is available.
Doyou want me to make a play date ?
- A play date ?
- Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.
Bye, T-Jerk.
Now, Becky, be nice
toyour little brother.
Hes feeling S-A-D right now.
- I can spell, Mom.
- Well, unlike some kids,
I gotta get to work.
Mr. Walsh says ifI can
master the Vatman 2000,
Ill be assistant manager
by the end ofthe summer,
and you know what that means--
Ill get to drive
the Floppy Burger truck.
Boy, shes sure
aiming for the stars.
At least shes not sitting
around the house, moping all summer.
Going to a play date
with Randall.
Man, I cant believe
I sunk this low.
This is the worst summer ever.
[ Loud Zap ]
- What the heck ?
- [ Loud Zap ]
- Thats weird.
- Hey, you!
Get away from that fence !
Hey, Dad, what do they
use the school for during the summer ?
They lock it up.
Its empty. Why ?
Today, when I was riding by,
I saw this scary guy and--
Im sure he wasjust
cleaning up.
I think something weirds going on
in there-- something really weird.
[ Sighs ]
Mrs. La Salle was right.
We shouldve sent him
to some kind ofcamp.
9:32 a.m. Ugly bald guy
still guarding school.
[Horn HonKs]
Staging area one.
- Give me a hand with this.
- Got it.
9:32-and-a-halfa.m.
Grownups wrong. Schools not empty.
[LoudZap]
9:32 and three quarters.
Green glow in window again.
Im going in
for a closer look.
[ Loud Zap ]
Allright,
goaheadandelevateit.
[ Gasps ]
Mom ! Mom !
- [ Groans ]
- T.J. ! Areyou all right ?
Those guys at the school, theyre doing
some kind ofevil experiment !
That bonk on the head
mustve rattled your little brain.
- But, Mom--
- Youre feverish.
You wait right here.
Ill go get the baby thermometer
and the petroleum jelly.
Uh, Dad, Dad !
- Dad !
- What is it, boy ?
Those bad guys have a laser beam
and theyre lifting this safe--
T.J., did you run into
the sliding glass door again ?
No, but-- Yeah, but--
Gaaah !
Come back ! Your moms gonna
want to takeyour temperature !
Okay, kid,
we got it all in the report.
Well take care of
those mad scientists.
[ Chuckles ] Yeah, no ones gonna
levitate any safe on mywatch.
Ooh, look, Artie,
somebodys levitating my doughnut...
with a laser beam !
-[Laughing Continues]
- Gohome, Kid!Gohome!
Laugh at me, will ya ?
- Im gonna be a taxpayer someday !
-[Man] Haveagoodround.
Principal Prickly !
Wait !
Yeah, you guys
did it right.
Psychology, law, waste management--
good, solid careers.
Me, Im stuckwith a bunch
ofpain-in-the-neck kids all year.
- Pete, areyou gonna putt
or grouse all day ?
- Okay, okay, here goes.
-[TJ.]PrincipalPricKly!
- Ohh !
You gotta come quick !
Its an emergency !
Well, well, well, ifit isnt
Mr. Ice Cream For Everyone.
- This is that kid
I was telling you about.
- The saggy butt kid ?
- Hey, hey, whatever happened to
doctor-patient confidentiality ?
- Sorry.
Something weirds
going on in the school.
I saw these mad scientists and--
Yeah, yeah, very funny.
Im not falling for another one
ofyour so-calledjokes.
- How dumb doyou think I am ?
- Its not ajoke, sir.
They have this laser beam, and--
Aw, please, Principal Prickly, you gotta
believe me ! The schools in danger !
Give me a break,
Detweiler.
Come on.
Go with the kid, Pete.
- This isnt the kind ofissue
you should be avoiding.
- [ All Laughing ]
All right, Detweiler,
lets get this overwith.
Looks fine to me.
Now can I go back to my golfgame ?
Just wait till you get inside.
Youll see.
Oh, the things I do
foryou kids.
Sometimes I thinkyou were
put on this Earthjust to--
- Aaah !
- Aaah !
Aaah !
[ Panting ]
1 1 :57 a.m.
Principal Prickly
dematerialized...
in a horrifying field
ofelectricity.
The cops wont listen.
Mom and Dad wont listen.
I gotta get the guys together.
Its the onlyway.
Like, I am so through
with him, Melissa.
He asked me ifI spoke French,
then winked at me.
Becky, you gotta help me !
I need a ride up to Chesterville !
Areyou kidding ? Im not doing anything
foryou, you little dork.
Oh, how I dream ofthe mustache fuzz
onJimmys sweaty lips...
glistening as he cooks in the light
ofa dozen hamburger heat lamps.
- Hey, thats my diary ! Give me that !
- Ah-ah-ah. Ive got copies.
Eitheryou give me a ride,
or this baby hits the Internet.
Getyourmotorrunnin
Headouton thehighway
ThanKs fordrivingme, BecKy.
Youre thesweetestbigsister
aKidcouldasK for.
Andyouare theannoyingpetmonKey
I wish Inevergot!
Hey, I trytoKeep things
interesting.
Nextreststop, pullin.
Igotta taKe care ofbusiness.
Get that front leg up,
Biggles.
You call that a pitch,
Hornsby ?
Come on, La Salle !
Throw it, dont aim it !
I know, I know !
Man, I can pitchjust fine
when Im with my friends.
Psst! Psst!
- T.J., what areyou doing here ?
- You gotta come back to town.
Its an emergency.
What ? I cantjust leave.
Something weird
is going on at school.
- Principal Prickly got dematerialized.
- Dematerialized ?
- T.J., youre crazy.
- Am I ?
Mt. Van Buren ? Thats 20 miles away.
Im not taking you there.
Dear Diary,
I dreamed ofJimmy again.
He was rocking me so gently,
-just like he rocks the grease off
a basket ofhot and steamy onion rings.
- [ Moans ]
- Whoa ! Let me look at that.
-Jerks.
Hey, you kids ! Get away from
that fake Martian landscape !
- Miss Director ! Miss Director !
- What is it now, Gretchen ?
Ive been studying the moon with the
200-inch telescope at the observatory,
and Ive detected some peculiar
eccentricities in its orbit.
Gretchen, maybeyou should try out one
ofthese neat antigravity harnesses.
The other kids love em,
and look, you can even do back flips,
Just like real astronauts.
But--
[ Sighs ]
Why do I bother ?
Becauseyoure driven
by a passionate desire for knowledge ?
T.J. ? Vince ?
What areyou guys doing here ?
Youre not gonna
believe this, but--
- Dematerialized ?
-Just like out ofStar TreK.
Fascinating.
Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
- Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
- Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
Mi, mi, mi, mi--
[ Whispering ]
Me ?
Look out, marshals !
Here comes the flying press !
[ Grunts ]
Youareapathetic excuse
forasoldier, Griswald!
You will never be a leader !
Now, stand at attention until I return !
And do not move a muscle !
Doyou hear me ? Not a muscle !
- Thanks a lot, sis.
- You owe me gas money.
- Okay, Teej, whats this
big secret plot ofyours ?
- Follow me.
Look at that.
Lets get movin out.
- Who are those guys ?
- Perhaps theyre government agents.
- Or gangsters.
- Or aliens.
Aliens ?
They dont look like aliens.
Well, maybe theyre in disguise.
Yeah, ifyou were an alien,
you wouldntjust walk around
in your lizard skin all day.
Hmm. Good point.
Whoever they are, we need
to take a closer look.
- Well get the rest later.
- Right. Ill close it up.
Hurry.
Man, this thing weighs a ton.
Thats cause its full
ofmoon rocks and alien eggs.
Hey, itsjust
a bunch ofpaper.
Weather maps ? Test scores ?
Some stuffwritten in Swedish ?
- Actually, thats Norwegian.
- Whatever. Its all
Just dumb school stuff.
You got me out ofbaseball camp to watch
some guys restock the supply room ?
No ! Somethings going on
in the school ! I swear !
Teej, I thinkyou cooked
this whole thing upjust cause
you wanted us back from camp.
- What ?
- Hey, we understand.
It must be pretty boring around here
all summer byyourself.
Your mind simply created an adventure
because it needed some excitement.
No, it really happened.
I saw Prickly disappear.
Well, if Prickly disappeared,
then whos that ?
- Come on, guys. Lets get back to camp.
- Yeah.
Seeya in a few weeks, Teej.
No, wait !
You guys gotta believe me !
- Im not making it up ! I-- I--
-[MetalClanKing]
- Aye-yi-yi, yi-yi.
- [ All Gasp ]
Whoa !
Whats happening ?
[ Sputtering ]
Okay, that right there ?
That was messed up.
[TJ. ]
MiKey ?
Mikey, you okay ?
W-Where am I ?
Youre in T.J.s backyard, man.
Howd you guys
get me here ?
Hey, this is kinda comfy.
Yeah, yeah. Get out ofthere,
you big lummox.
Okay, Teej, you were right. Something
weird is going on in the school.
- And Prickly must be in on it.
- I saywe go to the police.
I alreadywent to the police.
I went to everyone. Nobodyll listen.
- What we need is proof.
- Proof? How are we gonna get proof?
- I got a plan. A stakeout.
- A stakeout ?
We can stay up in my tree house
and watch the school every night
until something happens.
- Like one ofthem TV cop shows.
- Sure.
The next time those laser guys make
a move, well catch em red-handed.
We can take pictures
with my night-vision digital cam.
Then we call in the feds
and, bang, we got em.
Onlyoneproblem--
Whataboutcamp ?
Oh, yeah. Ifmy dad finds out
Ive gone AWOL, hell throw me
in the brig till September.
Not to worry. Ill get Becky to drive
you back to camp in the morning.
Then at night well pickyou up again.
Campers by day, spies by night.
But what ifthe camp counselors
notice were not there ?
Leave that to me.
- Call foryou, sir.
- Give me that.
- Captain Brad here.
- Bradley. This is Colonel OMalley.
- Colonel OMalley ?
- Your commanding officer !
Oh ! Yes, sir !
Sorry, sir !
Ihearyouvegotasoldiertherenamed
Griswald. Goodman. One ofthebest.
- H-He is ?
- You heard me ! Hes officer material.
Ive had my eyes on him
foryears.
Now, pay attention, Bradley. Ive got
Griswald on special assignment tonight.
- When he gets back to camp,
act like nothings happened.
- Yes, sir !
And youd better start making his bed
and spit-shining his shoes as well.
Thats all for now.
Carry on.
Okay, Spinelli, youre next.
Someones wrestling
My Lord
Kumbayah
Heads are smashing
My Lord
-[Phone Rings]
- Kumbayah
Speak to me.
- Bones are cracking, My Lord
- Yeah ? Yeah ?
- Ill cover foryou, Spinelli,
but its gonna costyou.
- Kumbayah
Oh, like, that is such the wrong
color forVince. Put the blue one on.
AshleyA, you totally
know how to accessorize.
[ Boys Snoring ]
[ Whispering, Muttering ]
Infrared night vision,
200-to-1 zoom.
I gotta hand it toyou, Gretch. You can
see the whole school with this thing.
You can make lots ofhandy devices out
ofthe spare parts in a familys garage.
I once fashioned
a particle accelerator...
out ofa broken hair dryer
and a four-slice toaster oven.
Tonight, the magical moment
arrived.
We met behind the drive-thru menu
and kissed passionately...
as the sound ofthe deep fat fryer
faded into the night.
Man, I wish I had
an older sister.
Laugh ifyou will.
I think its beautiful.
Sorry Im late, guys, but I had to
wait till my mom and dad fell asleep...
before I could sneak out
with... the goodies.
Roast beefand mashed potatoes !
My favorite !
Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.
- I also managed to swipe this.
- Rocky Road ! My other favorite !
Hey, give me
some ofthat.
Excuse me, but arent we supposed
to eat dinner before dessert ?
Good one, Gretch.
You were right, Teej.
This is the life.
Hanging out with friends,
eating ice cream, spying on bad guys.
Its the ultimate
kid experience.
Too bad these days are numbered.
Yeah, this is probably
the last summer...
well get to do stufflike this.
Kinda whomps, huh ?
Hey, remember that summer
after second grade...
when we went down to the pond
every day to catch minnows ?
Or how about that summerwe all
carved our initials in that tree
in the Wilsons backyard ?
And Spinelli
spelled hers wrong.
Hey, I was seven.
And Ss are tricky.
[GusSobbing]
Whats your problem ? This is
the first summeryouve lived here.
I know, and Ill never
have any ofthose memories.
[ Whimpering ]
Know what Ill never forget ?
That song
T.J.s sister taught us...
the first summer
after kindergarten.
Oh, yeah.
Backwhen she was nice.
- Howd it go again ?
- [ Inhales Deeply]
[ Adult Baritone ]
JohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
His name is my name too
[ All ]
Whenever I go out
The people always shout
There goesJohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
[ Tempo Quickens ]
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
JohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
His name
is my name too
Whenever I go out
the people always shout
There goesJohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
Na-Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na
[ Whispering ]
JohnJacobJingleheimer Schmidt
His name
is my name too
Whenever I go out
Thepeoplealwaysshout
TheregoesJohnJacob
JingleheimerSchmidt
[Fades]
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
[ Loud Zapping ]
Well, here we are, sir. But its
Just an old principals office.
Why is it so important ?
Because, my academically
challenged young friend,
it used to be mine.
1 0:41 a.m.
Gang back at camp.
Im goin in alone.
[Man]
Man, oh, man.
Iveheardofsimple assignments,
but this one taKes the caKe.
Yuck.
Hey.
1 0:43 a.m. I found
what appear to be...
Principal Pricklys golfpants ?
Factis, youregettin
realgoodat thisstuff.
Yeah, youre a regular
Robert De Niro.
Hey, Im a man
ofmany talents.
- Principal Prickly ?
- But wasnt Mrs. Prickly suspicious ?
You kiddin ? It was like
taking candy from a baby.
[Laughing Continues]
Double-knit polyester.
These are Pricklys all right.
But whywould the bald guywanna pretend
to be Principal Prickly ?
And wheres the real
Principal Prickly anyway ?
Wait a minute.
Theres something in here.
Help me ?
It sounds like a desperate cry
for help.
- Then Principal Prickly
must still be in the school.
- Being held captive !
You know what that means,
dontyou, guys ?
We gotta go in there
and save him.
- Bikes ?
- Check.
- Walkie-talkie ?
- Check.
- Rope with pointy thing ?
- Check.
Good. Then lets go.
I still say this is nuts.
Breaking out ofthe school
I understand, but breaking in ?
Oh, boy !
Ms. Finsters gonna love this.
[Whistling]
[Groans]
[ Grunting ]
-[DoorbellRings]
- Dang.
Ten more minutes, and the pizza
wouldve been free.
[ Sighs ]
Its 9:00 at night, Randall.
- What doyou want ?
- Its about T.J. Detweiler.
Randall, Im offduty until Labor Day.
Hes someone elses problem now.
But hes got all his friends
together, and theyre planning
to break into the school !
A break-in, eh ?
Not if Muriel P. Finster
has anything to say about it.
- Told you, Ms. Finster.
- [ Chuckles ]
I wonder ifI can get em
tried as adults. Come on.
Hold the rope, boy.
-[Rope CreaKing]
- Uh-oh.
-[Snap]
- Aaaah !
-[Thud]
-[Groans]
[ Muffled ] Ms. Finster,
could you please get offofme ?
[Gretchen]
My, this issomewhatcreepy.
Yeah. Ive never been
in a empty school at night before.
Heck, Ill bet no kid has.
I wonderwhere the aliens went.
They probably go back
to the mother ship at night.
Quick. In here.
[Footsteps Passing]
Hey, this is
our old room.
I hope somebodys
feeding the gerbil.
-[Man TalKing, Echoing]
- Shh ! I hear something !
I want this system worKingnow.
Doyouhearme ? Now!
Were doingourbest, sir. Wevejust
run intoa fewtechnicaldifficulties.
Its coming from up there.
- LiKe what ?
- I thinK whatDr. Lazenby
is trying tosay--
Oh, IKnow whathes trying
tosay. Hes trying to--
- What areyou doing ?
- Finding out whats what.
[Men Continue TalKing]
Bingo.
[ Grunting ]
Im stuck.
[ Continues Grunting ]
Curse these
bodacious hips ofmine.
Randall, run back to my place
and get the butter.
- Doyouhaveanyidea who
youre talKing to, Laramie ?
- Its Lazenby--
Thatphoton channeler
isapiece ofequipment,
liKea carburetorinyour car!
Youresupposedtobe
abrilliant thinKer.
DoyouKnow whatbrilliant thinKers
aresupposedto do ?
Theyre supposed to think !
Whoa, what is
all this stuff ?
Well, against the farwall is what
looks to be a plutonium turbine.
Closerahead, youllobserve
aglobalelectrode.
Toyourrightis
thelaserdevice wesawearlier,
andofcourse, thatglowingorb--
an electronpulsegenerator.
- The nerve center ofthe system.
- Shh ! The bad guys are talking.
- But, Dr. Benedict, please--
- No, let me make this
clear toyou, Lazenby.
We have a thing called
a window ofopportunity.
Ifwe miss the window ofopportunity,
then the project fails.
And ifthe project fails,
then I get very,
very... angry !
Th-Theymayhave
apoint, sir.
It seems the logistical problems
are a bit more complicated
than Dr. Steinheimer thought.
Yes, it would be a lot easier
ifwe could move the laser
to a more appropriate location.
This operation will be
executed as planned from right here !
Have I made myselfclear ?
- But, sir--
- No buts !
It started at 3rd Street.
It is going to end at 3rd Street.
Dr. Benedict,
were ready for the test.
Coming.
[Scientist]
Levelsaregood.
- Ready ?
- Ive been ready for decades.
-Just do it.
- Yes, sir.
Initiate photon channeling.
Photon channeling initiated.
Set magnification
coordinates .073.
Coordinates set.
Engage tractor beam now.
[ Continues Grunting ]
[LoudZapping]
What are those kids
up to in there ?
[ All Gasp ]
A little more.
A little more.
- Hes shooting at the moon.
- I told you theywerent aliens.
[ Beam Sputtering ]
-[Turbine WindingDown]
- Dr. Rosenthal,
why did the beam suddenly--
Oh, whats the technical
word for it ? Stop ?
W-Well, uh, as I believe
you were told before--
Told before ?
[ Chuckles ]
Doyou think I care what I was told
before ? Ill do better next time.
Next time.
Isnt that cute.
Rosenthal,
let me askyou something.
Sayyou were a teacher--
or even better, say,
the principal ofa school--
and you had to deal with a naughty child
who didnt know his place,
who kept telling you over and over
that hed do better next time.
But he never did.
What would you do ?
Oh, no. N-Not detention.
Not detention !
- Take him away !
- No, please ! I can fix it !
Dont do this to me-e-e !
All right, whos
second-in-command ?
- Uh, I am, sir.
- Well, good. Nowyoure in charge.
And ifI wereyou, Id make sure
I had this machine working at
full power by tomorrow morning.
- Do I make myselfclear ?
- Y-Yes, sir.
Oh, dear,
I got spittle on my lapel.
Mmm.
-[Vince] Wegottagetoutofhere.
- Uh-oh.
- What is it ?
- I got that feeling.
- Hold it in, big guy. Hold it in !
- I cant !
[ Loud Burp, Echoing ]
What was that ?
Someone had better
say excuse me.
[ All ]
Whoa !
Fenwick, who let children
into the school ?
U-Uh, n-not me, sir.
- Well, get them !
- Run !
- [ Men Shouting ]
- There they are !
- [ All Gasp ]
- Huh ?
Get offour planet,
alien scum !
[ Groans ]
Over there !
- Get em ! Get em !
- Come back here !
Huh ? Whoa !
[ Grunts ]
- Hyah !
- Ninjas !
- Hyah !
- Get em !
Ninjas ! Whyd they
have to be ninjas ?
[ All Shouting ]
This way ! Hurry !
- Go ! Go ! Lets go ! Hurry up !
- Go ! Go ! Hurry up !
- Nowyou !
- But, Teej--
- Go !
- Haaah !
- [ Gasps ]
Saveyourselves !
- T.J. ! T.J. !
- It wont budge !
[ Shouting Continues ]
[ Grunts ]
What theJ.P. Morgan
is going on around here ?
Let me go.
Let me go !
Im warning you !
Im a black belt in origami !
Well, well, well,
ifitaint thelittlesnoop.
- What ? I aint no snoop.
- [ Tape Rewinding ]
[ T.J. On Tape ] 9:32 a.m.
Ugly bald guy still guarding school.
Heh-heh. Oops.
Lets go, snoop.
Youre in big trouble now.
Ow ! Ow ! Watch thejacket !
Its cotton !
[MuffledShouting]
Principal Prickly !
Youre alive !
- Oww ! Would you be careful !
- Boy, am I glad to seeyou.
You wont believe what these
guys are doing. Theyve got
this big laser gun and--
- Whoa, who tookyour pants ?
- Never mind, Detweiler.Just untie me.
- These knots are tight.
- Ofcourse.
Ive been pulling at them
for the last day and a half.
Theyve chaffed mywrist.
- Dont worry, sir.
My palsll get us out ofhere.
- What makes you so sure ?
You dont know my friends.
Theyll get help. Youll see.
Soyoure saying youjust escaped
from a troop ofninja warriors ?
- Thats right !
- And they got a giant laser gun
in the school auditorium ?
- Precisely !
- Which is aimed at the moon ?
Thank heavens you understand !
[ Grunts ]
Ive almost got it.
Careful, Detweiler.
Thats my putting hand.
[DoorLocK UnlocKing]
Hello, Pete.
Remember me ?
Well, well, ifit isnt
Phillium Benedict.
- I shouldve known
youd be the one behind this.
- You know this guy ?
Ah, Pete and I
are old pals.
Although the last time
we saw each other, Pete
was the one ruining my life.
By the way, Pete, you like this suit ?
Its Italian. Raw silk. Nice, huh ?
You always were more concerned
about appearances than people, Phil.
Oh, Pete, come on.
Theres no need to be rude.
Not after I instructed my men
to take such special care ofyou.
Special care ?
Thats whatyou call gagging me,
tying me up and taking away my pants ?
Had to. Otherwise, you might run offand
betray me, likeyou did the last time.
But, hey,
look at the bright side.
At leastyouve got company now.
Let the boy go.
He cant do anything toyou.
[ Sighs ]
Same old noble Pete.
- Always standing up
for the rights ofchildren.
- You ?
But, unfortunately,
I cant let anybody go right now.
You see, this experimental, um,
night school that Im running
is kind ofa secret.
Im trying to show that my...
[ Chuckles ] adult students
can be trained...
to be capable and productive
members ofsociety.
Well, ifyourejust
running a night school,
then whats that giant laser gun
doing in the auditorium ?
What a rude and badly dressed
little boyyou are.
You should teach your pupils a little
respect for their superiors, Pete.
But that would mean thatyoud
have to know how to teach them
anything at all, wouldnt it ?
Geez, how doyou
know thatjerk ?
We went through
teacher training together.
- You mean--
- Thats right, Detweiler.
That man is a rogue teacher.
[PricKly]
It wasbacK in thespringof68.
A differentage.
We wereallyoung, idealistic
andreadyto change the world.
[ Chattering ]
[RocK]
Oh ! Ha ha ha.
Peace, Peter.
Hey, Muriel, had a groovy time
at the Dead concert last night.
You gonna be at the teach-in Saturday ?
Were gonna paint myVolkswagen.
- Wouldnt miss it for the world.
- Groovy.
Yes, weall thought
we wereprettycool.
- Butoneguy was the coolestofusall.
-[VehicleApproaching]
Phillium Benedict
was mybestfriend.
He wassmart,
he washandsome.
Hehadjustbeennamedprincipal
of3rdStreetSchool.
[ All Giggling ]
So, Phillium, hows it feel
being theyoungest principal
in the history ofthe state ?
Copacetic, baby.
I mean, you know what they say:
Young is in, man, and old is out.
Way out.
Doyou like the American flag
helmet, Pete ? It does go
with the leatherjacket, right ?
You are one groovy educator, Phil.
Cool. Follow me, my man.
I wanna showyou
my new principals pad.
Whoa !
Psychedelic principalia.
Pull up a bag, bro.
I wanna rap.
- Lay it on me, man.
- You see, Pete, I been thinkin.
Were a new generation
ofteachers, right ?
Its time we shook things up
a little.
I hearyou, brother.
In fact, dig this.
I was meditating to that new
Ravi Shankar album last night...
when I got
this righteous notion--
What ifwe hold all our classes outside,
on the playground ?
Imagine-- school, recess.
No boundaries.
Hey, baby, thats a hip idea,
but I got a better thought here.
As my first official act
as principal,
Ive decided...
to get rid ofrecess.
What ? No recess ?
But, Phil, for a kid,
recess is like a major play-in.
Its the one time ofday
they have any freedom.
[ Sighs ]
Look, Pete,
the 60s are over.
All that peace and love
and freedom stuff, it was great
for pickin up chicks,
but its not gonna
help my career.
To do that, I gotta
make test scores go up,
and to make test scores go up, I gotta
keep kids in class where they belong.
Thats why, starting tomorrow,
I am tuning out recess...
once and for all.
[PricKly]
Needless tosay,
Phillium splan
didntgo overall that well.
[ Shouting ]
- [ Protester] What do we want ?
- [ Crowd ] Recess !
- When do we want it ?
- Now !
- What do we want ? When do we want it ?
- Recess ! Now !
Be cool, people, be cool.
Youre bumming my mellowness.
Well be cool when you give our kids
their recess back.
Hey, baby,
Ill do what I want.
Im principal ofthe school, and theres
nothing anyone can do about it. Dig ?
[ Shouting Continues ]
[Man]
Itsnotright!
- People, people, please calm down.
- [ Shouting Stops ]
Mr. Prickly here has informed me
ofthis no recess proposal.
Let me assureyou that
as long as Im superintendent,
this radical plan will never
be carried out in this district.
- [ Cheering ]
- Hey, man, youjust dont get it !
Ofcourse I do, Benedict.
- Thats why Im replacing you.
- What ?
- Prickly, from now on,
you will be principal.
- Who, me ?
Oh, I see whats going down here.
You tricked me, went around my back
to the man to get myjob !
- No, Phil, its not like that at all.
- Yeah, right !
Come on, Muriel baby,
lets blow this scene.
No, Phil, its over. I could never
be with a man who doesnt love recess.
Soyoure against me too.
Well, fine. I dont need you.
I dont need anyone !
- Aaah !
- Phil ! You okay, man ?
Dont touch me !
You took my chick.
You took myjob.
Well, enjoy it whileyou can,
Petey boy,
causeyoure gonna pay.
Somehow, someway,
youre gonna pay.
IneversawPhillium again.
He quit teaching,
went into politics,
eventually became
secretary ofeducation--
until the president fired him for
trying to get rid ofrecess again.
Only this time
it was nationwide.
So that guys some weirdo ex-teacher
who wants to get rid ofrecess ?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
Now its personal.
Lets see-- weather maps,
some stuffin Norwegian,
a FarmersAlmanac.
Must be something in here thatll
explain what that Dr. Benedict is doing.
Ill tell you one thing
hes not doing--
having lunch tomorrow at 1 2:22
with his little girlfriend.
Spinelli, thats the mans
personal date book.
Well, its mine now,
and I guess Miss Luna Pergum is gonna
be at the restaurant all by herself.
- Who did you say ?
- The girl whose name
is in here-- Luna Pergum.
Must be some Italian chick.
Lunaeperigeum.
Ofcourse !
- What areyou talking about ?
- Dontyou understand ?
Lunaeperigeum is no lady.
Its an event. Look.
Once a month, the moon reaches the point
where its closest to the Earth--
lunar perigee, which in this case
happens to be 1 2:22 tomorrow afternoon.
Maybe thats when that doctor
guy is gonna shoot his laser
at the moon and blow it up.
Close guess,
but I have another theory.
When I was up at space camp,
I observed some abnormalities
in the moons position.
I couldnt figure out what was
causing it, but now it all makes sense.
Dr. Benedicts device is not a
laser beam at all. Its a tractor beam !
You mean hes gonna plow the moons
surface ? Whateverwill he plant ?
Not a tractor, you goombah.
A tractor beam.
Like from
a science fiction movie.
Precisely.
Theoretically,
ifa powerful tractor beam...
were shot at the moon
exactly at lunar perigee,
it could move the moon
into another orbit.
Move the moon ? But why
would anybodywant to do that ?
Who knows, Vince ?
Who knows ?
[Banging On Metal]
Here we are, sir.
I cant believeyou have been
creeping around in these vents.
Theyre school property.
Dang ! The lines dead.
Hey, what did you do
with the walkie-talkie
you confiscated from me last week ?
Top drawer, on the right.
Just lookwhat Phils done to my office.
I had it all nice and clean
for the summer.
Packs ofgum, yo-yos,
my old baseball--
Hey, Ive been looking
for this.
Here it is--
mywalkie-talkie.
Now all I gotta do is
contact the guys and--
- Oh, no.
- What is it, Detweiler ?
I told em
that guywas a nut.
[ T.J. ] Hello !
Hello ! Is anybody there ?
Its T.J. !
T.J., buddy, youre okay ?
- Yeah, Im fine,
and so is Principal Prickly.
- Principal Prickly ?
I dont have time to explain,
but I thinkweve figured out
what Benedict is up to.
Hes trying to get rid
ofsummervacation !
No !
Guys, dont freak out on me !
I got a plan ! All we do is--
Heh-heh. Why, Mr. Bald Guy,
what a surprise.
T.J. ! T.J. !
- Its dead !
- They mustve got him !
What are we gonna do ?
Theres only
one thing we can do:
we gotta get help.
[ Becky] Bow-wow ! Welcome to Floppy
Burger. May I takeyour order, please ?
- Becky, this is Vince.
- [ Becky] What areyou doing here ?
Its notjust Vince, its me,
Gretchen, everybody. We got a problem !
I got a problem too-- six dweeby
ten-year-olds who wont leave me
alone, even when Im at work.
I am a professional ! So whatever
your little problem is, forget it !
- But its about T.J .
- Hes in trouble,
and he needs your help.
[ Becky ]
Well, isnt that nice ?
After stealing my diary, threatening
to put it on the Internet...
and making me drive across the
state three times, he needs my help ?
Give me one good reason
why I should help him.
Cause hes your little brother,
and he needs you.
Please pull forward to
the second drive-thru window.
A confiscated
walkie-talkie.
Why doyou do these things ? Doyou
enjoy tormenting me ? Doyou hate me ?
I dont hateyou, Phil.
I just thinkyoure insane.
[ Chuckles ]
Insane.
Well, thereyou go again, Pete.
Insulting me, hurting my feelings,
Just like 30 years ago.
Only this time, Petey,
Im ready.
You see, all thoseyears, no matter
how big I got, no matter how successful,
I always thought aboutyou.
Howyou embarrassed me !
Howyou humiliated me !
Howyou destroyed my relationship
with Muriel Finster,
the onlywoman I ever loved !
- That part still grosses me out, sir.
- Shh.
This time, Pete,
Im gonna humiliateyou.
Im gonna prove to the world
thatyou were wrong and I was right.
- About what ?
- About recess !
About freedom !
About test scores !
Ive found a way
to prove my theory.
Im gonna get rid of
the biggest recess ofthem all.
I am gonna get rid
ofsummervacation.
- You fiend !
- Fiend. Try to help people,
thats the thanks you get.
- Itll neverwork, Phil.
- Well, actually, Pete,
thats whereyoure wrong.
You see, all I have to do is modify
the moons orbit ever so slightly,
and tide levels on the Eastern Seaboard
rise eight feet.
Move the moon over here,
and the currents that warm California
suddenly become ice-cold.
Summer, as we know it,
will become a thing ofthe past.
And without summer,
- [ Both Gasp ]
- no summervacation.
- Youll never get away
with this, Benedict.
- Oh, yeah ?
Well, whos gonna stop me ?
Wow, I cant believe
my little brother...
actually stumbled on
a real, live evil conspiracy.
- Thats ourTheodore.
- You should see the crates
ofsoda they left back there.
And boxes ofmustard
and ketchup too.
Mmm, tomato-ey.
Hey, thats stuffs the property of
Floppy Burger International.
Quityour gabbin and step on it.
We need reinforcements.
[Cheering, Shouting]
[Cheering, Shouting]
[Finster] Im tellingyou,
a troop ofninja warriors...
is using3rdStreetSchoolas
asecretjujitsu trainingground.
- Ninja warriors. Elementary school.
- [ Snickering ]
Jujitsu training ground ?
Hey, lady, arentyou forgetting
the magic laser beam ?
- Im serious !
- So are we.
Hey, I got an idea-- Why dontyou
go home, get some rest...
and well make a personal call
toJackie Chan.
Yeah, hes the perfect man
for ajob like this.
Im telling ya, something is
going on in that school !
Help ! Help !
Somebody get us outta here !
- Calm down, Detweiler.
- Calm down ?
Were locked in a giant birdcage
while a madmans trying to
destroy summervacation,
and you want me
to calm down ?
- I understand, but I--
- How can you understand ?
Yourejust a grownup.
What doyou know
about summervacation ?
Ill letyou in on
a little secret, Detweiler.
Every adultyouve ever known
was a kid some time in his life.
You thinkwe dont
remember summervacation ?
Riding bikes by the creek ?
Catching polliwogs in ajar ?
Camping out under the stars ?
Well, youre wrong.
Some days I sit in my office, looking
out atyou kids on the playground,
and I think, They dont know
how good theyve got it.
In a fewyears, theyre all
going to be grownups, like me,
and all those good times will
Just be memories for them too.
So go ahead, put a whoopee cushion in my
chair, cover my carpet with fake vomit,
make fun of
my big, saggy butt.
But dontyou ever say I dont care
about summervacation,
cause those memories are the last
part ofchildhood Ive got left.
Principal Prickly,
I had no idea.
Yeah, well, nowyou do.
- So lets stop messing around.
- How did you get those keys ?
Swiped em off Philliums desk
when he wasnt looking.
Now come on.
Weve got a summervacation to save.
[ All Chattering ]
People ! People !
Just quiet down for a moment !
Oh, man, nobodys listening.
Theyll listen to me, once I introduce
them to my good friend Madam Fist.
Come on, Spinelli.
Thats your answer for everything.
I dont seeyou coming up
with any great ideas, sports boy.
Listen to the two ofyou.
Youre not helping at all.
[ All Arguing ]
[Gus]
Quiet!
What we need is a leader.
A kid with
the right training.
A kid who knows strategy
and field tactics.
A kid who commands respect.
Yeah, but where we gonna
find a kid like that ?
Leave that to me.
- [ Chattering Continues ]
-[Gretchen Whistles]
Please !
We have to get organized.
Ah, whats the use ?
Ifwhatyou say is true,
all the fun ofbeing a kid
is, like, totally ruined anyway.
- Its like the whole worlds
been turned right side up.
- [ All Agreeing ]
Not necessarily. All we have to do is
work together and come up with a plan.
- Detweilers the one who always
comes up with the plans.
- Lets face it-- were doomed.
- [ All Agreeing ]
-[Spinelli] Thats what you thinK!
Kids ofthe playground, meet
your new commanding officer.
Griswald ? He couldnt
lead a glee club.
You find that funny,
Bradley ?
Well, Im not here to makejokes !
Im here to make history !
So ifyou wanna laugh,
take it somewhere else.
But ifyou wanna save the world, then
suck in your gut and stand at attention.
Now whos with me ?
[Kazoos Playing
RiverKwaiMarch]
[ Screams ]
Soda bomb ! Soda bomb !
[Gus] Vince, youandtheAshleys
willbein charge ofunit A.
Ill take unit B.
Spinelli, you get the special forces.
- Special forces ?
- The kindergartners.
- I oweyou for this, Griswald.
- Now theres one last thing
I need to say.
- [ Talking Ceases ]
- This mission is bigger than
any one ofus kids.
Bigger than T.J .
Even bigger than Principal Prickly.
This, my friends,
is about the future.
- Geez, he sounds like T.J .
- Shh. Hes on a roll.
Years from now when kids who arent
even born yet look back on this moment,
theyll say,
They did it.
Those kids saved
3rd Street School.
They saved summervacation.
So, boys and girls,
were goin in.
- Twenty-two minutes to perigee, sir.
- Very good, Fenwick.
[Men Chattering Indistinctly]
- Hello, boys.
- Hey !
[Men Groaning]
[Punches Landing]
- Where now ?
- The auditorium.
Check.
[ Inhales ]
Nessun dorma
[ All ]
Huh ?
Nessun dorma
[Man]
Is thataKid ?
- Ma il mio mistero e chiuso in me
- Hey, kid, get out ofhere !
Aah. Anderson, get rid
ofthat kid, will ya ?
Ilnomemio
nessunsapra
-[AndersonScreaming]
-No, no
- Smithson, Underhill.
- Sir.
Sulla tuaboca
-[MenScreaming]
-Lo diro
- Quando la luce
- Hanklin, Morrissey,
Goodman, get over here !
- Yes, sir.
- Right away, sir. On the double.
Well take care ofhim.
Dont worry about it.
You sure this is
gonna work, Detweiler ?
Come on, Principal Prickly.
Dontyou everwatch old spy movies ?
This trick is pure gold.
Uh, Dr. Benedict wanted to speak to
us about a very important matter.
Hey, you two
arent guards.
Run !
Im called little buttercup
Anderson, Morrissey, Underhill ?
Where is everybody ?
Aah, ifyou want something
done right, you gotta do ityourself.
- Poor little buttercup
- [ Screams ]
- Sweet little buttercup, I
- [ All Shouting ]
Boy, these space-age
power shovels sure do a greatjob.
Quick, in here.
This way !
Theyre inside.
We lost em.
Now what ?
Ammo.
[ Both ]
Tender.
Commence phase two.
Ready ?
- Hey, guards !
- Huh ?
[ Grunting ]
You little brats !
Now !
- Intruders !
- [ Shouting ]
[ All Screaming ]
Scandalous !
[ Shouting Indistinctly]
- Now !
- Huh ?
Bombard, men !
- Get em.
- [ All Shouting ]
[ Screaming ]
Lunch room, front office--
Here it is, auditorium.
[ Loud Hum Resonating ]
Uh, Fenwick,
why is the power off ?
Uh, perhaps
we blew a fuse, sir ?
Well, go fix it !
We must restore the power.
Quickly, here.
Hey, whathappened?
Letus out!
Plans working, Gus.
Good. Now we gotta stop that
laser beam before its too late.
Thats whatyou thinK, Kid.
Youbratsare done for.
[TJ. ]
Hey, baldy!
Sayyour prayers.
Its chowder time.
[ Screaming ]
- Bulls-eye !
- T.J. !
I knewyou guys would
come back for us.
- Ooh, thats gotta hurt.
- Six minutes to perigee !
Quick. To the auditorium.
And no running in the halls !
Emergency power system
is in place.
Switch on the global electrode.
Power up the photon channeler.
Activate the tractor beam, quickly !
Weve only got four minutes left.
[PricKly]
Youvegotnominutes left, Phil.
This is my school
and I want it back.
Sorry, Pete. Yourejust gonna
have to wait until I finish
making the world a better place.
- Now lets get this show on the road.
- Dont do it, Dr. Benedict !
[ Chuckles ] Dont do it ?
You think after all this planning,
all this work, you can get me to
stopjust by saying, Dont do it ?
- What ifwe add please ?
- [ Sighs ] You kids
Just dont get it, doyou ?
Well, let me explain this
in a wayyour little uneducated
brains will understand.
The American public think
test scores are too low.
But ifa person, say me,
could make test scores go up,
why, everybodyd feel better.
They might even elect that person...
President ofthe United States.
Now, doyou have any idea which
countries have the highest test scores ?
- Um,Japan ?
- Germany ?
- Tierra Del Fuego ?
Canada, Iceland, Norway !
And why ? Because its snowing
up there all the time.
Kids dont waste their summers playing
ball. Theyre inside studying.
And that is why Im getting
rid ofsummervacation once and for all.
You got it all wrong, old man.
Your plan will neverwork.
Sure, maybeyour crazy
laser beam can move the moon.
Maybe it can even make it
snow all summer.
Maybeyou can get rid
oflong afternoons playing baseball,
or sunny days down by the lake orwarm
nights camping out under the stars.
But that wont stop us.
Well ride our bikes through the snow.
Well play kick ball in the slush,
well camp out in igloos.
You may take away summer, butyoull
never take away summervacation.
Well, I can try.
Do it... now !
Yes, sir.
Begin photon channeling.
Photon channeling begun.
Setmagnification
coordinates.073.
- Coordinates set.
- Engage tractor beam.
- No !
- [LoudBang]
Hey, teacher,
leave them kids alone !
- Ms. Finster.
- Muriel, its you.
Youre still a vision
ofloveliness.
Yeah ?Andyourestilla two-bit,
recess-hatingprettyboy.
That hurt, Muriel. But Ill forgiveyou
ifyoull just come back to me.
Ha ! Id rather eat
playground dirt.
That can be arranged,
my dear.
Not before I takeyou down.
Take me down ? Yeah, right.
You and what army ?
Me and this army.
The teachers !
[ Shouting ]
[ Karate Shouts ]
Get them !
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
-No, no, no, no, Nobody can do the
-Shimmy
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-ShaKe
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-Boogaloo
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-Shimmy
[Continues]
[ Screaming ]
Fire !
-Letme tellyou, Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
- [ Gasps ]
- Drink soda, ninjas !
Halt !
Flying press !
- Nice flying press, Spinelli.
- Thanks. Ive been working on it.
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
You !
[Ms. Finster]
Stop right there, KojaK.
Its go time.
-Nobody can do the
-ShaKe
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-Boogaloo
- Thanks, Ms. Finster.
-Just doing myjob, Detweiler.
Hurry !
Theres still time.
Faster, you idiot !
Faster !
Holditright there, Phillium.
Thesemesters overforyou, pal.
Not so fast, Pete. You might fall asleep
and miss the festivities.
- Hey, Phillium,
theres a spot on your tie.
- Where ?
[NinjaScreams]
- Itsjammed.
- Youre too late, Pete.
This time I win.
Vince !
The photon channeler.
And forget what they told you.
Aim it. Dont throw it.
- Look out ! Shes gonna blow !
- [ All Screaming ]
All my plans,
my hopes and dreams...
ruined.
Ruined !
Getyour hands offthe suit,
you classless feeb !
I am the former
secretary ofeducation.
Yeah, yeah. And Im the former
princess of Morocco. Get in the car.
B-B-But its all his fault.
I was only following orders.
Ill turn states evidence.
Geez, what a squealer.
Come on, Grotke. Ill takeyou on.
My boxing againstyour martial arts.
East meets West.
Well see who wins.
I dont know, Muriel. Im only supposed
to use it for self-defense.
What an exciting summer.
T.J. saved the world...
and Becky made assistant
fry chefat Floppy Burger.
Come on, Ellie. The reporters wanna
talk to us about how we raised a hero.
Listen, Becky, I heard about howyou
saved my life and everything, and...
- well, here, I think this is yours.
- My diary ?
I cant believe it. You realize
this means you dont have
any leverage over me anymore ?
Hey, what can I say ?
Maybe Im just growing up.
Gee, youre an all-right
little brother after all.
But, Teej, what about the
extra copies you got stashed
away up in the tree house ?
Oh, I wasjust bluffing
about those.
So, Teej, we got two weeks
ofsummervacation left.
What doyou saywe do em up right ?
But dontyou guys have to get back
to camp, work on your futures and all ?
Well, weve been thinkin.
And weve decided theres plenty
oftime for preparing for our futures.
But only a little time left
forjust being kids.
So, what doyou saywe head down
to the pond and skip some rocks ?
You guys gotyourselves a deal.
Oh, boy ! My first
summervacation memories.
Uh, guys.
- Ill catch up with you.
I forgot something inside.
- Okay, but hurry.
- Principal Prickly ?
- Huh ?
Oh, its you, Detweiler.
I wasjust, um, cleaning up this mess
Phillium left.
Guyalways wasapacK rat.
Look at this. A Norwegian
weather map from 1 956.
Listen, sir, I never really got a chance
to thankyou for all the stuffyou did.
You know, quitting your golfgame,
telling Benedict to let me go,
helping me save the world
andjunk.
Oh, actually, Detweiler,
Im the one who should be thanking you.
- Huh ?
- You did me a big favor
by dragging me into this mess.
See, I didnt get into teaching for
the promotions or the pension plans...
or so I could get
to the golfcourse by 3:45.
I-- I... did it cause I wanted to
helpyou kids. And Id forgotten that.
- Till today.
- [KnocKing On Window]
- Come on, Teej.
- The pond awaits.
- Ill be there in a second.
- Hey, its a gorgeous summer day
and your pals are waiting.
Go have some fun
whileyou can... Teej.
You got it... Pete.
[RocK nRoll]
But dont forget !
Come September, youre mine.
I havent forgotten
that saggy butt comment.
Hey, September is
a long way off.
Let thesunshine
Let thesunshinein
Thesunshinein
-Let thesunshine
- Whoa, letitshine
-Let thesunshinein
- Come on
- Thesunshinein
-Everybodyjustsingalong
-Let thesunshine
-Let thesunshinein
-Let thesunshinein
- Open upyourheart
andletinshinein
- Thesunshinein
- Whenyourealone
Let thesunshine
[TJ. ]
One, two, three, four.
Dropyour silver
in my tambourine
Help a poor man
build a pretty dream
Give me pennies
Ill take anything
Now listen while I play
[ Echoing ]
My green tambourine
Watch thejinglejangle
start toshine
Reflections ofthemusic
thatismine
Whenyou tossa coin
youllhearitsing
Now listen while I play
[ Echoing ]
My green tambourine
Dropa dime
before I walKaway
Anysongyou want
Illgladlyplay
Money feeds
my music machine
Now listen while I play
[ Echoing ]
My green tambourine
ListenandIllplay
[Echoing]
Mygreen tambourine
ListenandIllplay
[Echoing]
Oh, yeah
Mygreen tambourine
Illplay
mygreen tambourine
Ifyoulisten
I willplay
Mygreen tambourine
[Woman Vocalizing]
Callingoutaroundthe world
Areyouready
forabrand-newbeat
Thesummersnear
andthe timeis right
Fordancing in thestreet
-Dancing in Chicago
-Dancing in thestreet
-Down in NewOrleans
-Dancing in thestreet
-In New YorK City
-Dancing in thestreet
All weneedismusic
Sweetmusic
Therellbemusiceverywhere
Therellbeswinging
andswaying
Andrecordsplaying
Dancing in thestreet
Oh, itdoesntmatter
whatyou wear
Justas long
asyouare there
So, come on
Everyboygrabagirl
Everywherearoundthe world
Therellbe dancing
Were dancing in thestreet
Isaid
wellbe dancing
- Whoo!
-Dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
This isaninvitation
across thenation
A chance forKids tomeet
- Theyllbelaughingandsinging
-Laughing, singing
Andmusicswinging
Were dancing in thestreet
-Philadelphia, P.A.
-Dancing in thestreet
-BaltimoreandD. C. now
-Dancing in thestreet
- Cantforget the MotorCity
-Beep-beep, beep-beep Whoo!
All weneedismusic
Oh, music
Therellbemusiceverywhere
Therellbeswinging
andswaying
Andrecordsplaying
Dancing in thestreet
Oh, itdoesntmatter
whatyou wear
Justas long
asyouare there
Come on
everyboygrabagirl
Everywherearoundthe world
Therellbe dancing
Allaroundthe world
Everyboyandgirl
Dancing in thestreet
-Fromyourneighborhood
down to Hollywood
-Dancing in thestreet
-Dancing in thestreet
-Dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
By dannisis, Guatemala
divx@gua.gbm.net
Hey, hows it going, Frank ?
Not so good. I cant seem to get
this photon channelerworking.
Well, youd better
figure it out.
- The colonel wants to show
the system to the top brass next month.
- I know, I know.
[ Men Shouting ]
-[LoudBang]
- What was that ?
- Whats that sound out there ?
- [ Alarm Blaring ]
Its a break-in !
Erase the access code !
X-Y-4--
[ Gasps ]
[ Both Groan ]
[Alarm Continues
Blaring, Stops]
All clear.
Neatly done, Fernlick.
- Its, uh, Fenwick, sir.
- Oh.
- Are they dead ?
- No, sir. Merely unconscious.
Good, good.
You know how I hate violence.
Mmm. Nice shine.
-Uh, what next, sir ?
-Well, obviously, we establish our base.
- And where will that be ?
- The last place on Earth theyd look.
A place called...
3rd Street School.
Last day ofschool sale,
boys and girls.
Getyour celebratory
contraband right here.
Shaving cream, T.P., goofy string,
maps ofthe teachers houses.
Ill take one ofthem maps,
Hustler Kid.
Hey, Diggers, lets party.
Cant now. Gotta finish filling up
our holes before the end ofthe day.
Wont be able to dig em up nextyear
ifwe dont fill em now.
[ Spitting ]
Hey ! Big kids bury me !
Oops.
I, King Bob, in my last official
act before entering middle school,
hereby anoint this boy here
King Freddie the Second.
Mayyou boss around
all ofthe kids with fairness.
The king has graduated !
Long live the king !
- [ Cheering ]
- [ Hail to the Chief ]
Elbow up !
Eyes forward !
You call that kazoo playing ?
- Ah, ceremony.
- Im, like, moved, AshleyA.
Saywhatyou want about their
personal lives, Ashley Q
The royals have such style.
Keep em comin !
Lets go !
Ms. Finster, the kids are practically
mad with last-day-of-school fever !
Ofcourse they are, Randall.
Theyre animals living by pure instinct.
Ive got a list
ofinfractions a mile long:
The Diggers
hit a water main,
- the kindergarteners
are feasting on paste,
- Never mind, Randall.
Hustler Kid is, uh--
Did you say never mind ?
Thats right, Randall. What Ive
got here is bigger, much bigger.
All this year Ive been holding
back on the ice cream, hiding it
from all those little savages.
Just look at it, Randall.
Im counting 1 00, maybe 200 cases ofit.
What areyou going to do
with all those ice creams ?
Sell em back to the district,
ofcourse.
Think ofall the chalk
and erasers we can get.
But, Ms. Finster,
Ive got dirt on everybody.
Well, everybody except
Detweiler and his pals.
Come to think ofit,
I havent seen those guys anywhere.
Ah, forget about em, Randall.
Theres nothing T.J. Detweiler and his
hooligan friends can do to stop me now.
Well, that should do it.
Theres enough here for everyone.
Good. Then its party time.
Kids ofthe playground !
I giveyou ice cream !
Pull !
[ Cheering ]
- Ice cream !
- Choco-pops !
- Fudge bars !
Fudgsicle !
My ice cream !
Stop it !
Stop it, I say !
You little monsters
are in trouble now !
-Just waitll Principal Prickly
finds out about this !
-Attention, students !
- This is Principal Prickly talking.
- Ooh, that was fast.
Some ofyou may have noticed
ice cream on the playground.
I willnotstandforthis. This
ice creamshouldbe eatenimmediately.
Huh ?
[ Cheering ]
In addition, I wantyou all to ignore
Ms. Finster, no matterwhat she says...
about ice cream
or anything else.
- [ Cheering Continues ]
- [ Muttering ] This cant be happening.
Furthermore, I want to inform you
all that I have a fat, saggy butt...
which I like to scratch
every hour on the hour.
Also, I want to apologize
to all ofyou...
for being such a mean principal,
taking away hall passes,
giving guys recess detention,
refusing toacceptsicKnotes
just causeitdoesntlooK
liKeaguysmomssignature,
maKingKidsstandat the wall
forten wholeminutes, withnobreaK!
Man, I feel ashamed ofmyselffor all
the terrible, rotten things Ive done.
And nextyear,
I promise to--
Why, Principal Prickly, sir,
what a surprise.
Why doyou do this to me, Detweiler ?
Doyou enjoy tormenting me ?
- Doyou hate me ?
- On the contrary, sir, I have
the utmost respect foryou.
Dont be smart with me, boy. All year
long youve been pushing me, testing me.
- I dont know whatyou mean, sir.
- Oh, really ?
How about the timeyou convinced
the F.B.I. I was a Chinese agent
and got me arrested ?
You were giving us a speech on
personal hygiene. You had to be stopped.
How about the time
you forged my signature
and ordered a motorboat for the school ?
It was for the kindergarteners.
Owning a boats always been
kind ofa dream oftheirs.
Ive had enough ofyour pranks.
This time Im really gonna
throw the book atyou.
With all due respect, sir, youd better
get throwing, causeyoure out oftime.
- Huh ?
- Its the last day ofschool, sir.
Ive only got 20 more seconds
offourth grade left. Look.
In some ways, people,
this day is a bummer for me.
But in otherways
its the ultimate high,
because every milestone thatyou kids
pass is another step towards--
- Uh, Miss Grotke ?
- Yes, Spinelli ?
I dont mean
to interrupt, but--
Oh, yes !
Be my guest.
[ Kids In Unison ]
Six, five, four, three, two, one--
-[BellRings]
- [ Cheering ]
- Whoo !
- Whoo-hoo !
[ Laughing ]
Yeah !
[ Together]
Scandalous !
Callingoutaroundthe world
Areyouready forabrand-newbeat
-Summershere
- You eat paste ! You eat paste !
Andthe timeis right
fordancinin thestreet
-[Stops]
- Hey ! No running in the halls !
Yeah, whats the big deal ?
Itsjust the end ofthe school year.
[ Together]
The end ofthe school year ?
- Whoo-hoo !
Itdoesntmatter
whatyou wear
- Whoo-hoo ! [ Laughing ]
-Justas long asyouare there
Girls, what shall we do with
the rest ofthis corn chowder ?
[ Sniffs ] Aw, leave it in the kettle.
Itll keep till September.
- [ All Laughing ]
- Theyllbe dancing
Dancing in thestreet
- Theyre dancinin thestreet
-Dancing in thestreet
Seeyou nextyear,
Principal Prickly.
Youd better do some
growing up this summer, young man.
[ Sighs ]
I hate myjob.
Therellbelaughin
singin
Andrecordsplayin
Dancinin thestreet
Look at those hooligans.
Actually, I think its a wonderful
expression offreedom andjoy.
Ill tell you a wonderful expression
offreedom andjoy.
Twelve weeks ofnothing but me at the
West Side GolfCourse, and no Detweiler.
I second that emotion, sir.
Man, Teej,
that prankwas sweet.
Yeah, you shouldve seen
Finsters face-- I thought
she was gonna blow a gasket.
Those limesicles were tasty.
A tasty beginning
to a tasty summer.
Twelve weeks ofnothing but
riding bikes, hanging out at the lake...
and T.P.-ing
the West Side GolfCourse.
Summervacation--
the ultimate recess.
Yeah, I cant wait
to get to baseball camp.
Baseball camp ?
What areyou talking about ?
Actually, Teej,
Im gonna be out oftown too.
Big-time Wrestling Federation
has this training camp,
and I gotta learn some new moves
ifIm ever gonna turn pro.
- But, Spinelli--
- Its military camp for me.
My dad says I need to
learn to be a leader.
I shall be attending
the Mt. Van Buren Space Camp.
- Dont wanna let those
science geeks get ahead ofme.
- Youre all going to camp ?
- Not me.
- Thank goodness.
The Young Voices Training Program
doesnt like the word camp.
They provide opportunities for aspiring
singers to train theirvoices...
in a rigorous
yet supportive setting.
But summers gonna be ruined.
What am I gonna do ? Play baseball
by myself? Watch reruns ? Read ?
Sorry, man, but we gotta
think about our futures.
Yeah, we cant waste the whole summer
Just fooling around like kids.
- But we are kids !
- Actually, as ofthe completion
offourth grade,
we are technically considered
pre-young adults.
And nextyear
we wont even be pre.
But--
[ Sighs ]
All right, lets make the most
ofthe time weve got left.
When doyou all leave ?
- First thing in the morning.
- Oh, man.
[Chattering]
Well, theres my bus.
- Better get going.
- Yeah, same here.
Bye, Teej.
Try to have some fun, okay ?
Dont worry, buddy.
Youll have a great time without us.
I dont know, Vince.
All my plans were made for six.
Dont tell meyou Ashleys
are going to baseball camp.
Eeew !
As if!
Cheerleading camp
is right across the lake. Duh !
I hope its a big lake.
[Horn HonKs]
Ah, space camp.
Wonder iftheyll
let us make craters.
Hey, Hustler Kid,
I didnt knowyou wrestled.
I dont.
Im pre-management.
Besides, my research tells me
that kids who wrestle trade
the most for contraband snacks.
Which reminds me--
Wanna buy a Winger-Dinger ?
All right, all the kindergarten
performers on the bus first.
-[AllShouting]
- Me ViKing !
Me Viking !
Me Viking ! Me Viking !
Bon voyage...
[ Adult Baritone ]
T.J.
[Applause]
Big kid sing good.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Well, Teej,
theres my transport.
Why dontyou come with ?
Military camps gonna be a blast !
Griswald, you maggot,
getyour fanny over here now !
Thanks, Gus, but I think Ill
stick it out at home this summer.
Okay, butyou dont know
whatyoure missing.
- Hiya, Captain Brad !
- I dont likeyou, Griswald.
I am notyour friend !
- Do I make myselfclear ?
- Yes, sir ! Not looking
for friendship, sir !
Good luck, Gus.
Youre gonna need it.
Man, this summers
gonna whomp.
Oneis
theloneliestnumber
Thatyoulleverdo
Two canbe
asbadas one
Its theloneliestnumber
since thenumberone
[ Bird Squawking ]
Nois
thesaddestexperience
YoulleverKnow
Yes, its
thesaddestexperience
YoulleverKnow
Cause one
is theloneliestnumber
Thatyoulleverdo
Oneis
theloneliestnumber
Whoa-ohh
worse than two
And so, the summer season
officially begins...
with kids all over the country
rushing offto camp.
In other news, the national
No Recess movement...
has hit a serious
stumbling block...
with the disappearance
ofits leader,
former Secretary of Education
Phillium Benedict.
Benedict, fired by the president
twoyears ago for his extremist views,
has recently been--
No recess ?
What a bunch ofhogwash.
[ Yawns ]
Morning, Mom. Morning, Dad.
Areyoujust getting up now ?
Geez, youre sleeping away
yourwhole vacation.
Why dontyou go play
with your friends ?
What friends ? The ones
who abandoned me and went to camp ?
Now, T.J., I know there are
other boys around this summer.
Mrs. Ween says Randall is available.
Doyou want me to make a play date ?
- A play date ?
- Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.
Bye, T-Jerk.
Now, Becky, be nice
toyour little brother.
Hes feeling S-A-D right now.
- I can spell, Mom.
- Well, unlike some kids,
I gotta get to work.
Mr. Walsh says ifI can
master the Vatman 2000,
Ill be assistant manager
by the end ofthe summer,
and you know what that means--
Ill get to drive
the Floppy Burger truck.
Boy, shes sure
aiming for the stars.
At least shes not sitting
around the house, moping all summer.
Going to a play date
with Randall.
Man, I cant believe
I sunk this low.
This is the worst summer ever.
[ Loud Zap ]
- What the heck ?
- [ Loud Zap ]
- Thats weird.
- Hey, you!
Get away from that fence !
Hey, Dad, what do they
use the school for during the summer ?
They lock it up.
Its empty. Why ?
Today, when I was riding by,
I saw this scary guy and--
Im sure he wasjust
cleaning up.
I think something weirds going on
in there-- something really weird.
[ Sighs ]
Mrs. La Salle was right.
We shouldve sent him
to some kind ofcamp.
9:32 a.m. Ugly bald guy
still guarding school.
[Horn HonKs]
Staging area one.
- Give me a hand with this.
- Got it.
9:32-and-a-halfa.m.
Grownups wrong. Schools not empty.
[LoudZap]
9:32 and three quarters.
Green glow in window again.
Im going in
for a closer look.
[ Loud Zap ]
Allright,
goaheadandelevateit.
[ Gasps ]
Mom ! Mom !
- [ Groans ]
- T.J. ! Areyou all right ?
Those guys at the school, theyre doing
some kind ofevil experiment !
That bonk on the head
mustve rattled your little brain.
- But, Mom--
- Youre feverish.
You wait right here.
Ill go get the baby thermometer
and the petroleum jelly.
Uh, Dad, Dad !
- Dad !
- What is it, boy ?
Those bad guys have a laser beam
and theyre lifting this safe--
T.J., did you run into
the sliding glass door again ?
No, but-- Yeah, but--
Gaaah !
Come back ! Your moms gonna
want to takeyour temperature !
Okay, kid,
we got it all in the report.
Well take care of
those mad scientists.
[ Chuckles ] Yeah, no ones gonna
levitate any safe on mywatch.
Ooh, look, Artie,
somebodys levitating my doughnut...
with a laser beam !
-[Laughing Continues]
- Gohome, Kid!Gohome!
Laugh at me, will ya ?
- Im gonna be a taxpayer someday !
-[Man] Haveagoodround.
Principal Prickly !
Wait !
Yeah, you guys
did it right.
Psychology, law, waste management--
good, solid careers.
Me, Im stuckwith a bunch
ofpain-in-the-neck kids all year.
- Pete, areyou gonna putt
or grouse all day ?
- Okay, okay, here goes.
-[TJ.]PrincipalPricKly!
- Ohh !
You gotta come quick !
Its an emergency !
Well, well, well, ifit isnt
Mr. Ice Cream For Everyone.
- This is that kid
I was telling you about.
- The saggy butt kid ?
- Hey, hey, whatever happened to
doctor-patient confidentiality ?
- Sorry.
Something weirds
going on in the school.
I saw these mad scientists and--
Yeah, yeah, very funny.
Im not falling for another one
ofyour so-calledjokes.
- How dumb doyou think I am ?
- Its not ajoke, sir.
They have this laser beam, and--
Aw, please, Principal Prickly, you gotta
believe me ! The schools in danger !
Give me a break,
Detweiler.
Come on.
Go with the kid, Pete.
- This isnt the kind ofissue
you should be avoiding.
- [ All Laughing ]
All right, Detweiler,
lets get this overwith.
Looks fine to me.
Now can I go back to my golfgame ?
Just wait till you get inside.
Youll see.
Oh, the things I do
foryou kids.
Sometimes I thinkyou were
put on this Earthjust to--
- Aaah !
- Aaah !
Aaah !
[ Panting ]
1 1 :57 a.m.
Principal Prickly
dematerialized...
in a horrifying field
ofelectricity.
The cops wont listen.
Mom and Dad wont listen.
I gotta get the guys together.
Its the onlyway.
Like, I am so through
with him, Melissa.
He asked me ifI spoke French,
then winked at me.
Becky, you gotta help me !
I need a ride up to Chesterville !
Areyou kidding ? Im not doing anything
foryou, you little dork.
Oh, how I dream ofthe mustache fuzz
onJimmys sweaty lips...
glistening as he cooks in the light
ofa dozen hamburger heat lamps.
- Hey, thats my diary ! Give me that !
- Ah-ah-ah. Ive got copies.
Eitheryou give me a ride,
or this baby hits the Internet.
Getyourmotorrunnin
Headouton thehighway
ThanKs fordrivingme, BecKy.
Youre thesweetestbigsister
aKidcouldasK for.
Andyouare theannoyingpetmonKey
I wish Inevergot!
Hey, I trytoKeep things
interesting.
Nextreststop, pullin.
Igotta taKe care ofbusiness.
Get that front leg up,
Biggles.
You call that a pitch,
Hornsby ?
Come on, La Salle !
Throw it, dont aim it !
I know, I know !
Man, I can pitchjust fine
when Im with my friends.
Psst! Psst!
- T.J., what areyou doing here ?
- You gotta come back to town.
Its an emergency.
What ? I cantjust leave.
Something weird
is going on at school.
- Principal Prickly got dematerialized.
- Dematerialized ?
- T.J., youre crazy.
- Am I ?
Mt. Van Buren ? Thats 20 miles away.
Im not taking you there.
Dear Diary,
I dreamed ofJimmy again.
He was rocking me so gently,
-just like he rocks the grease off
a basket ofhot and steamy onion rings.
- [ Moans ]
- Whoa ! Let me look at that.
-Jerks.
Hey, you kids ! Get away from
that fake Martian landscape !
- Miss Director ! Miss Director !
- What is it now, Gretchen ?
Ive been studying the moon with the
200-inch telescope at the observatory,
and Ive detected some peculiar
eccentricities in its orbit.
Gretchen, maybeyou should try out one
ofthese neat antigravity harnesses.
The other kids love em,
and look, you can even do back flips,
Just like real astronauts.
But--
[ Sighs ]
Why do I bother ?
Becauseyoure driven
by a passionate desire for knowledge ?
T.J. ? Vince ?
What areyou guys doing here ?
Youre not gonna
believe this, but--
- Dematerialized ?
-Just like out ofStar TreK.
Fascinating.
Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
- Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
- Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi
Mi, mi, mi, mi--
[ Whispering ]
Me ?
Look out, marshals !
Here comes the flying press !
[ Grunts ]
Youareapathetic excuse
forasoldier, Griswald!
You will never be a leader !
Now, stand at attention until I return !
And do not move a muscle !
Doyou hear me ? Not a muscle !
- Thanks a lot, sis.
- You owe me gas money.
- Okay, Teej, whats this
big secret plot ofyours ?
- Follow me.
Look at that.
Lets get movin out.
- Who are those guys ?
- Perhaps theyre government agents.
- Or gangsters.
- Or aliens.
Aliens ?
They dont look like aliens.
Well, maybe theyre in disguise.
Yeah, ifyou were an alien,
you wouldntjust walk around
in your lizard skin all day.
Hmm. Good point.
Whoever they are, we need
to take a closer look.
- Well get the rest later.
- Right. Ill close it up.
Hurry.
Man, this thing weighs a ton.
Thats cause its full
ofmoon rocks and alien eggs.
Hey, itsjust
a bunch ofpaper.
Weather maps ? Test scores ?
Some stuffwritten in Swedish ?
- Actually, thats Norwegian.
- Whatever. Its all
Just dumb school stuff.
You got me out ofbaseball camp to watch
some guys restock the supply room ?
No ! Somethings going on
in the school ! I swear !
Teej, I thinkyou cooked
this whole thing upjust cause
you wanted us back from camp.
- What ?
- Hey, we understand.
It must be pretty boring around here
all summer byyourself.
Your mind simply created an adventure
because it needed some excitement.
No, it really happened.
I saw Prickly disappear.
Well, if Prickly disappeared,
then whos that ?
- Come on, guys. Lets get back to camp.
- Yeah.
Seeya in a few weeks, Teej.
No, wait !
You guys gotta believe me !
- Im not making it up ! I-- I--
-[MetalClanKing]
- Aye-yi-yi, yi-yi.
- [ All Gasp ]
Whoa !
Whats happening ?
[ Sputtering ]
Okay, that right there ?
That was messed up.
[TJ. ]
MiKey ?
Mikey, you okay ?
W-Where am I ?
Youre in T.J.s backyard, man.
Howd you guys
get me here ?
Hey, this is kinda comfy.
Yeah, yeah. Get out ofthere,
you big lummox.
Okay, Teej, you were right. Something
weird is going on in the school.
- And Prickly must be in on it.
- I saywe go to the police.
I alreadywent to the police.
I went to everyone. Nobodyll listen.
- What we need is proof.
- Proof? How are we gonna get proof?
- I got a plan. A stakeout.
- A stakeout ?
We can stay up in my tree house
and watch the school every night
until something happens.
- Like one ofthem TV cop shows.
- Sure.
The next time those laser guys make
a move, well catch em red-handed.
We can take pictures
with my night-vision digital cam.
Then we call in the feds
and, bang, we got em.
Onlyoneproblem--
Whataboutcamp ?
Oh, yeah. Ifmy dad finds out
Ive gone AWOL, hell throw me
in the brig till September.
Not to worry. Ill get Becky to drive
you back to camp in the morning.
Then at night well pickyou up again.
Campers by day, spies by night.
But what ifthe camp counselors
notice were not there ?
Leave that to me.
- Call foryou, sir.
- Give me that.
- Captain Brad here.
- Bradley. This is Colonel OMalley.
- Colonel OMalley ?
- Your commanding officer !
Oh ! Yes, sir !
Sorry, sir !
Ihearyouvegotasoldiertherenamed
Griswald. Goodman. One ofthebest.
- H-He is ?
- You heard me ! Hes officer material.
Ive had my eyes on him
foryears.
Now, pay attention, Bradley. Ive got
Griswald on special assignment tonight.
- When he gets back to camp,
act like nothings happened.
- Yes, sir !
And youd better start making his bed
and spit-shining his shoes as well.
Thats all for now.
Carry on.
Okay, Spinelli, youre next.
Someones wrestling
My Lord
Kumbayah
Heads are smashing
My Lord
-[Phone Rings]
- Kumbayah
Speak to me.
- Bones are cracking, My Lord
- Yeah ? Yeah ?
- Ill cover foryou, Spinelli,
but its gonna costyou.
- Kumbayah
Oh, like, that is such the wrong
color forVince. Put the blue one on.
AshleyA, you totally
know how to accessorize.
[ Boys Snoring ]
[ Whispering, Muttering ]
Infrared night vision,
200-to-1 zoom.
I gotta hand it toyou, Gretch. You can
see the whole school with this thing.
You can make lots ofhandy devices out
ofthe spare parts in a familys garage.
I once fashioned
a particle accelerator...
out ofa broken hair dryer
and a four-slice toaster oven.
Tonight, the magical moment
arrived.
We met behind the drive-thru menu
and kissed passionately...
as the sound ofthe deep fat fryer
faded into the night.
Man, I wish I had
an older sister.
Laugh ifyou will.
I think its beautiful.
Sorry Im late, guys, but I had to
wait till my mom and dad fell asleep...
before I could sneak out
with... the goodies.
Roast beefand mashed potatoes !
My favorite !
Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.
- I also managed to swipe this.
- Rocky Road ! My other favorite !
Hey, give me
some ofthat.
Excuse me, but arent we supposed
to eat dinner before dessert ?
Good one, Gretch.
You were right, Teej.
This is the life.
Hanging out with friends,
eating ice cream, spying on bad guys.
Its the ultimate
kid experience.
Too bad these days are numbered.
Yeah, this is probably
the last summer...
well get to do stufflike this.
Kinda whomps, huh ?
Hey, remember that summer
after second grade...
when we went down to the pond
every day to catch minnows ?
Or how about that summerwe all
carved our initials in that tree
in the Wilsons backyard ?
And Spinelli
spelled hers wrong.
Hey, I was seven.
And Ss are tricky.
[GusSobbing]
Whats your problem ? This is
the first summeryouve lived here.
I know, and Ill never
have any ofthose memories.
[ Whimpering ]
Know what Ill never forget ?
That song
T.J.s sister taught us...
the first summer
after kindergarten.
Oh, yeah.
Backwhen she was nice.
- Howd it go again ?
- [ Inhales Deeply]
[ Adult Baritone ]
JohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
His name is my name too
[ All ]
Whenever I go out
The people always shout
There goesJohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
[ Tempo Quickens ]
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
JohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
His name
is my name too
Whenever I go out
the people always shout
There goesJohnJacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt
Na-Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na
[ Whispering ]
JohnJacobJingleheimer Schmidt
His name
is my name too
Whenever I go out
Thepeoplealwaysshout
TheregoesJohnJacob
JingleheimerSchmidt
[Fades]
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
[ Loud Zapping ]
Well, here we are, sir. But its
Just an old principals office.
Why is it so important ?
Because, my academically
challenged young friend,
it used to be mine.
1 0:41 a.m.
Gang back at camp.
Im goin in alone.
[Man]
Man, oh, man.
Iveheardofsimple assignments,
but this one taKes the caKe.
Yuck.
Hey.
1 0:43 a.m. I found
what appear to be...
Principal Pricklys golfpants ?
Factis, youregettin
realgoodat thisstuff.
Yeah, youre a regular
Robert De Niro.
Hey, Im a man
ofmany talents.
- Principal Prickly ?
- But wasnt Mrs. Prickly suspicious ?
You kiddin ? It was like
taking candy from a baby.
[Laughing Continues]
Double-knit polyester.
These are Pricklys all right.
But whywould the bald guywanna pretend
to be Principal Prickly ?
And wheres the real
Principal Prickly anyway ?
Wait a minute.
Theres something in here.
Help me ?
It sounds like a desperate cry
for help.
- Then Principal Prickly
must still be in the school.
- Being held captive !
You know what that means,
dontyou, guys ?
We gotta go in there
and save him.
- Bikes ?
- Check.
- Walkie-talkie ?
- Check.
- Rope with pointy thing ?
- Check.
Good. Then lets go.
I still say this is nuts.
Breaking out ofthe school
I understand, but breaking in ?
Oh, boy !
Ms. Finsters gonna love this.
[Whistling]
[Groans]
[ Grunting ]
-[DoorbellRings]
- Dang.
Ten more minutes, and the pizza
wouldve been free.
[ Sighs ]
Its 9:00 at night, Randall.
- What doyou want ?
- Its about T.J. Detweiler.
Randall, Im offduty until Labor Day.
Hes someone elses problem now.
But hes got all his friends
together, and theyre planning
to break into the school !
A break-in, eh ?
Not if Muriel P. Finster
has anything to say about it.
- Told you, Ms. Finster.
- [ Chuckles ]
I wonder ifI can get em
tried as adults. Come on.
Hold the rope, boy.
-[Rope CreaKing]
- Uh-oh.
-[Snap]
- Aaaah !
-[Thud]
-[Groans]
[ Muffled ] Ms. Finster,
could you please get offofme ?
[Gretchen]
My, this issomewhatcreepy.
Yeah. Ive never been
in a empty school at night before.
Heck, Ill bet no kid has.
I wonderwhere the aliens went.
They probably go back
to the mother ship at night.
Quick. In here.
[Footsteps Passing]
Hey, this is
our old room.
I hope somebodys
feeding the gerbil.
-[Man TalKing, Echoing]
- Shh ! I hear something !
I want this system worKingnow.
Doyouhearme ? Now!
Were doingourbest, sir. Wevejust
run intoa fewtechnicaldifficulties.
Its coming from up there.
- LiKe what ?
- I thinK whatDr. Lazenby
is trying tosay--
Oh, IKnow whathes trying
tosay. Hes trying to--
- What areyou doing ?
- Finding out whats what.
[Men Continue TalKing]
Bingo.
[ Grunting ]
Im stuck.
[ Continues Grunting ]
Curse these
bodacious hips ofmine.
Randall, run back to my place
and get the butter.
- Doyouhaveanyidea who
youre talKing to, Laramie ?
- Its Lazenby--
Thatphoton channeler
isapiece ofequipment,
liKea carburetorinyour car!
Youresupposedtobe
abrilliant thinKer.
DoyouKnow whatbrilliant thinKers
aresupposedto do ?
Theyre supposed to think !
Whoa, what is
all this stuff ?
Well, against the farwall is what
looks to be a plutonium turbine.
Closerahead, youllobserve
aglobalelectrode.
Toyourrightis
thelaserdevice wesawearlier,
andofcourse, thatglowingorb--
an electronpulsegenerator.
- The nerve center ofthe system.
- Shh ! The bad guys are talking.
- But, Dr. Benedict, please--
- No, let me make this
clear toyou, Lazenby.
We have a thing called
a window ofopportunity.
Ifwe miss the window ofopportunity,
then the project fails.
And ifthe project fails,
then I get very,
very... angry !
Th-Theymayhave
apoint, sir.
It seems the logistical problems
are a bit more complicated
than Dr. Steinheimer thought.
Yes, it would be a lot easier
ifwe could move the laser
to a more appropriate location.
This operation will be
executed as planned from right here !
Have I made myselfclear ?
- But, sir--
- No buts !
It started at 3rd Street.
It is going to end at 3rd Street.
Dr. Benedict,
were ready for the test.
Coming.
[Scientist]
Levelsaregood.
- Ready ?
- Ive been ready for decades.
-Just do it.
- Yes, sir.
Initiate photon channeling.
Photon channeling initiated.
Set magnification
coordinates .073.
Coordinates set.
Engage tractor beam now.
[ Continues Grunting ]
[LoudZapping]
What are those kids
up to in there ?
[ All Gasp ]
A little more.
A little more.
- Hes shooting at the moon.
- I told you theywerent aliens.
[ Beam Sputtering ]
-[Turbine WindingDown]
- Dr. Rosenthal,
why did the beam suddenly--
Oh, whats the technical
word for it ? Stop ?
W-Well, uh, as I believe
you were told before--
Told before ?
[ Chuckles ]
Doyou think I care what I was told
before ? Ill do better next time.
Next time.
Isnt that cute.
Rosenthal,
let me askyou something.
Sayyou were a teacher--
or even better, say,
the principal ofa school--
and you had to deal with a naughty child
who didnt know his place,
who kept telling you over and over
that hed do better next time.
But he never did.
What would you do ?
Oh, no. N-Not detention.
Not detention !
- Take him away !
- No, please ! I can fix it !
Dont do this to me-e-e !
All right, whos
second-in-command ?
- Uh, I am, sir.
- Well, good. Nowyoure in charge.
And ifI wereyou, Id make sure
I had this machine working at
full power by tomorrow morning.
- Do I make myselfclear ?
- Y-Yes, sir.
Oh, dear,
I got spittle on my lapel.
Mmm.
-[Vince] Wegottagetoutofhere.
- Uh-oh.
- What is it ?
- I got that feeling.
- Hold it in, big guy. Hold it in !
- I cant !
[ Loud Burp, Echoing ]
What was that ?
Someone had better
say excuse me.
[ All ]
Whoa !
Fenwick, who let children
into the school ?
U-Uh, n-not me, sir.
- Well, get them !
- Run !
- [ Men Shouting ]
- There they are !
- [ All Gasp ]
- Huh ?
Get offour planet,
alien scum !
[ Groans ]
Over there !
- Get em ! Get em !
- Come back here !
Huh ? Whoa !
[ Grunts ]
- Hyah !
- Ninjas !
- Hyah !
- Get em !
Ninjas ! Whyd they
have to be ninjas ?
[ All Shouting ]
This way ! Hurry !
- Go ! Go ! Lets go ! Hurry up !
- Go ! Go ! Hurry up !
- Nowyou !
- But, Teej--
- Go !
- Haaah !
- [ Gasps ]
Saveyourselves !
- T.J. ! T.J. !
- It wont budge !
[ Shouting Continues ]
[ Grunts ]
What theJ.P. Morgan
is going on around here ?
Let me go.
Let me go !
Im warning you !
Im a black belt in origami !
Well, well, well,
ifitaint thelittlesnoop.
- What ? I aint no snoop.
- [ Tape Rewinding ]
[ T.J. On Tape ] 9:32 a.m.
Ugly bald guy still guarding school.
Heh-heh. Oops.
Lets go, snoop.
Youre in big trouble now.
Ow ! Ow ! Watch thejacket !
Its cotton !
[MuffledShouting]
Principal Prickly !
Youre alive !
- Oww ! Would you be careful !
- Boy, am I glad to seeyou.
You wont believe what these
guys are doing. Theyve got
this big laser gun and--
- Whoa, who tookyour pants ?
- Never mind, Detweiler.Just untie me.
- These knots are tight.
- Ofcourse.
Ive been pulling at them
for the last day and a half.
Theyve chaffed mywrist.
- Dont worry, sir.
My palsll get us out ofhere.
- What makes you so sure ?
You dont know my friends.
Theyll get help. Youll see.
Soyoure saying youjust escaped
from a troop ofninja warriors ?
- Thats right !
- And they got a giant laser gun
in the school auditorium ?
- Precisely !
- Which is aimed at the moon ?
Thank heavens you understand !
[ Grunts ]
Ive almost got it.
Careful, Detweiler.
Thats my putting hand.
[DoorLocK UnlocKing]
Hello, Pete.
Remember me ?
Well, well, ifit isnt
Phillium Benedict.
- I shouldve known
youd be the one behind this.
- You know this guy ?
Ah, Pete and I
are old pals.
Although the last time
we saw each other, Pete
was the one ruining my life.
By the way, Pete, you like this suit ?
Its Italian. Raw silk. Nice, huh ?
You always were more concerned
about appearances than people, Phil.
Oh, Pete, come on.
Theres no need to be rude.
Not after I instructed my men
to take such special care ofyou.
Special care ?
Thats whatyou call gagging me,
tying me up and taking away my pants ?
Had to. Otherwise, you might run offand
betray me, likeyou did the last time.
But, hey,
look at the bright side.
At leastyouve got company now.
Let the boy go.
He cant do anything toyou.
[ Sighs ]
Same old noble Pete.
- Always standing up
for the rights ofchildren.
- You ?
But, unfortunately,
I cant let anybody go right now.
You see, this experimental, um,
night school that Im running
is kind ofa secret.
Im trying to show that my...
[ Chuckles ] adult students
can be trained...
to be capable and productive
members ofsociety.
Well, ifyourejust
running a night school,
then whats that giant laser gun
doing in the auditorium ?
What a rude and badly dressed
little boyyou are.
You should teach your pupils a little
respect for their superiors, Pete.
But that would mean thatyoud
have to know how to teach them
anything at all, wouldnt it ?
Geez, how doyou
know thatjerk ?
We went through
teacher training together.
- You mean--
- Thats right, Detweiler.
That man is a rogue teacher.
[PricKly]
It wasbacK in thespringof68.
A differentage.
We wereallyoung, idealistic
andreadyto change the world.
[ Chattering ]
[RocK]
Oh ! Ha ha ha.
Peace, Peter.
Hey, Muriel, had a groovy time
at the Dead concert last night.
You gonna be at the teach-in Saturday ?
Were gonna paint myVolkswagen.
- Wouldnt miss it for the world.
- Groovy.
Yes, weall thought
we wereprettycool.
- Butoneguy was the coolestofusall.
-[VehicleApproaching]
Phillium Benedict
was mybestfriend.
He wassmart,
he washandsome.
Hehadjustbeennamedprincipal
of3rdStreetSchool.
[ All Giggling ]
So, Phillium, hows it feel
being theyoungest principal
in the history ofthe state ?
Copacetic, baby.
I mean, you know what they say:
Young is in, man, and old is out.
Way out.
Doyou like the American flag
helmet, Pete ? It does go
with the leatherjacket, right ?
You are one groovy educator, Phil.
Cool. Follow me, my man.
I wanna showyou
my new principals pad.
Whoa !
Psychedelic principalia.
Pull up a bag, bro.
I wanna rap.
- Lay it on me, man.
- You see, Pete, I been thinkin.
Were a new generation
ofteachers, right ?
Its time we shook things up
a little.
I hearyou, brother.
In fact, dig this.
I was meditating to that new
Ravi Shankar album last night...
when I got
this righteous notion--
What ifwe hold all our classes outside,
on the playground ?
Imagine-- school, recess.
No boundaries.
Hey, baby, thats a hip idea,
but I got a better thought here.
As my first official act
as principal,
Ive decided...
to get rid ofrecess.
What ? No recess ?
But, Phil, for a kid,
recess is like a major play-in.
Its the one time ofday
they have any freedom.
[ Sighs ]
Look, Pete,
the 60s are over.
All that peace and love
and freedom stuff, it was great
for pickin up chicks,
but its not gonna
help my career.
To do that, I gotta
make test scores go up,
and to make test scores go up, I gotta
keep kids in class where they belong.
Thats why, starting tomorrow,
I am tuning out recess...
once and for all.
[PricKly]
Needless tosay,
Phillium splan
didntgo overall that well.
[ Shouting ]
- [ Protester] What do we want ?
- [ Crowd ] Recess !
- When do we want it ?
- Now !
- What do we want ? When do we want it ?
- Recess ! Now !
Be cool, people, be cool.
Youre bumming my mellowness.
Well be cool when you give our kids
their recess back.
Hey, baby,
Ill do what I want.
Im principal ofthe school, and theres
nothing anyone can do about it. Dig ?
[ Shouting Continues ]
[Man]
Itsnotright!
- People, people, please calm down.
- [ Shouting Stops ]
Mr. Prickly here has informed me
ofthis no recess proposal.
Let me assureyou that
as long as Im superintendent,
this radical plan will never
be carried out in this district.
- [ Cheering ]
- Hey, man, youjust dont get it !
Ofcourse I do, Benedict.
- Thats why Im replacing you.
- What ?
- Prickly, from now on,
you will be principal.
- Who, me ?
Oh, I see whats going down here.
You tricked me, went around my back
to the man to get myjob !
- No, Phil, its not like that at all.
- Yeah, right !
Come on, Muriel baby,
lets blow this scene.
No, Phil, its over. I could never
be with a man who doesnt love recess.
Soyoure against me too.
Well, fine. I dont need you.
I dont need anyone !
- Aaah !
- Phil ! You okay, man ?
Dont touch me !
You took my chick.
You took myjob.
Well, enjoy it whileyou can,
Petey boy,
causeyoure gonna pay.
Somehow, someway,
youre gonna pay.
IneversawPhillium again.
He quit teaching,
went into politics,
eventually became
secretary ofeducation--
until the president fired him for
trying to get rid ofrecess again.
Only this time
it was nationwide.
So that guys some weirdo ex-teacher
who wants to get rid ofrecess ?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
Now its personal.
Lets see-- weather maps,
some stuffin Norwegian,
a FarmersAlmanac.
Must be something in here thatll
explain what that Dr. Benedict is doing.
Ill tell you one thing
hes not doing--
having lunch tomorrow at 1 2:22
with his little girlfriend.
Spinelli, thats the mans
personal date book.
Well, its mine now,
and I guess Miss Luna Pergum is gonna
be at the restaurant all by herself.
- Who did you say ?
- The girl whose name
is in here-- Luna Pergum.
Must be some Italian chick.
Lunaeperigeum.
Ofcourse !
- What areyou talking about ?
- Dontyou understand ?
Lunaeperigeum is no lady.
Its an event. Look.
Once a month, the moon reaches the point
where its closest to the Earth--
lunar perigee, which in this case
happens to be 1 2:22 tomorrow afternoon.
Maybe thats when that doctor
guy is gonna shoot his laser
at the moon and blow it up.
Close guess,
but I have another theory.
When I was up at space camp,
I observed some abnormalities
in the moons position.
I couldnt figure out what was
causing it, but now it all makes sense.
Dr. Benedicts device is not a
laser beam at all. Its a tractor beam !
You mean hes gonna plow the moons
surface ? Whateverwill he plant ?
Not a tractor, you goombah.
A tractor beam.
Like from
a science fiction movie.
Precisely.
Theoretically,
ifa powerful tractor beam...
were shot at the moon
exactly at lunar perigee,
it could move the moon
into another orbit.
Move the moon ? But why
would anybodywant to do that ?
Who knows, Vince ?
Who knows ?
[Banging On Metal]
Here we are, sir.
I cant believeyou have been
creeping around in these vents.
Theyre school property.
Dang ! The lines dead.
Hey, what did you do
with the walkie-talkie
you confiscated from me last week ?
Top drawer, on the right.
Just lookwhat Phils done to my office.
I had it all nice and clean
for the summer.
Packs ofgum, yo-yos,
my old baseball--
Hey, Ive been looking
for this.
Here it is--
mywalkie-talkie.
Now all I gotta do is
contact the guys and--
- Oh, no.
- What is it, Detweiler ?
I told em
that guywas a nut.
[ T.J. ] Hello !
Hello ! Is anybody there ?
Its T.J. !
T.J., buddy, youre okay ?
- Yeah, Im fine,
and so is Principal Prickly.
- Principal Prickly ?
I dont have time to explain,
but I thinkweve figured out
what Benedict is up to.
Hes trying to get rid
ofsummervacation !
No !
Guys, dont freak out on me !
I got a plan ! All we do is--
Heh-heh. Why, Mr. Bald Guy,
what a surprise.
T.J. ! T.J. !
- Its dead !
- They mustve got him !
What are we gonna do ?
Theres only
one thing we can do:
we gotta get help.
[ Becky] Bow-wow ! Welcome to Floppy
Burger. May I takeyour order, please ?
- Becky, this is Vince.
- [ Becky] What areyou doing here ?
Its notjust Vince, its me,
Gretchen, everybody. We got a problem !
I got a problem too-- six dweeby
ten-year-olds who wont leave me
alone, even when Im at work.
I am a professional ! So whatever
your little problem is, forget it !
- But its about T.J .
- Hes in trouble,
and he needs your help.
[ Becky ]
Well, isnt that nice ?
After stealing my diary, threatening
to put it on the Internet...
and making me drive across the
state three times, he needs my help ?
Give me one good reason
why I should help him.
Cause hes your little brother,
and he needs you.
Please pull forward to
the second drive-thru window.
A confiscated
walkie-talkie.
Why doyou do these things ? Doyou
enjoy tormenting me ? Doyou hate me ?
I dont hateyou, Phil.
I just thinkyoure insane.
[ Chuckles ]
Insane.
Well, thereyou go again, Pete.
Insulting me, hurting my feelings,
Just like 30 years ago.
Only this time, Petey,
Im ready.
You see, all thoseyears, no matter
how big I got, no matter how successful,
I always thought aboutyou.
Howyou embarrassed me !
Howyou humiliated me !
Howyou destroyed my relationship
with Muriel Finster,
the onlywoman I ever loved !
- That part still grosses me out, sir.
- Shh.
This time, Pete,
Im gonna humiliateyou.
Im gonna prove to the world
thatyou were wrong and I was right.
- About what ?
- About recess !
About freedom !
About test scores !
Ive found a way
to prove my theory.
Im gonna get rid of
the biggest recess ofthem all.
I am gonna get rid
ofsummervacation.
- You fiend !
- Fiend. Try to help people,
thats the thanks you get.
- Itll neverwork, Phil.
- Well, actually, Pete,
thats whereyoure wrong.
You see, all I have to do is modify
the moons orbit ever so slightly,
and tide levels on the Eastern Seaboard
rise eight feet.
Move the moon over here,
and the currents that warm California
suddenly become ice-cold.
Summer, as we know it,
will become a thing ofthe past.
And without summer,
- [ Both Gasp ]
- no summervacation.
- Youll never get away
with this, Benedict.
- Oh, yeah ?
Well, whos gonna stop me ?
Wow, I cant believe
my little brother...
actually stumbled on
a real, live evil conspiracy.
- Thats ourTheodore.
- You should see the crates
ofsoda they left back there.
And boxes ofmustard
and ketchup too.
Mmm, tomato-ey.
Hey, thats stuffs the property of
Floppy Burger International.
Quityour gabbin and step on it.
We need reinforcements.
[Cheering, Shouting]
[Cheering, Shouting]
[Finster] Im tellingyou,
a troop ofninja warriors...
is using3rdStreetSchoolas
asecretjujitsu trainingground.
- Ninja warriors. Elementary school.
- [ Snickering ]
Jujitsu training ground ?
Hey, lady, arentyou forgetting
the magic laser beam ?
- Im serious !
- So are we.
Hey, I got an idea-- Why dontyou
go home, get some rest...
and well make a personal call
toJackie Chan.
Yeah, hes the perfect man
for ajob like this.
Im telling ya, something is
going on in that school !
Help ! Help !
Somebody get us outta here !
- Calm down, Detweiler.
- Calm down ?
Were locked in a giant birdcage
while a madmans trying to
destroy summervacation,
and you want me
to calm down ?
- I understand, but I--
- How can you understand ?
Yourejust a grownup.
What doyou know
about summervacation ?
Ill letyou in on
a little secret, Detweiler.
Every adultyouve ever known
was a kid some time in his life.
You thinkwe dont
remember summervacation ?
Riding bikes by the creek ?
Catching polliwogs in ajar ?
Camping out under the stars ?
Well, youre wrong.
Some days I sit in my office, looking
out atyou kids on the playground,
and I think, They dont know
how good theyve got it.
In a fewyears, theyre all
going to be grownups, like me,
and all those good times will
Just be memories for them too.
So go ahead, put a whoopee cushion in my
chair, cover my carpet with fake vomit,
make fun of
my big, saggy butt.
But dontyou ever say I dont care
about summervacation,
cause those memories are the last
part ofchildhood Ive got left.
Principal Prickly,
I had no idea.
Yeah, well, nowyou do.
- So lets stop messing around.
- How did you get those keys ?
Swiped em off Philliums desk
when he wasnt looking.
Now come on.
Weve got a summervacation to save.
[ All Chattering ]
People ! People !
Just quiet down for a moment !
Oh, man, nobodys listening.
Theyll listen to me, once I introduce
them to my good friend Madam Fist.
Come on, Spinelli.
Thats your answer for everything.
I dont seeyou coming up
with any great ideas, sports boy.
Listen to the two ofyou.
Youre not helping at all.
[ All Arguing ]
[Gus]
Quiet!
What we need is a leader.
A kid with
the right training.
A kid who knows strategy
and field tactics.
A kid who commands respect.
Yeah, but where we gonna
find a kid like that ?
Leave that to me.
- [ Chattering Continues ]
-[Gretchen Whistles]
Please !
We have to get organized.
Ah, whats the use ?
Ifwhatyou say is true,
all the fun ofbeing a kid
is, like, totally ruined anyway.
- Its like the whole worlds
been turned right side up.
- [ All Agreeing ]
Not necessarily. All we have to do is
work together and come up with a plan.
- Detweilers the one who always
comes up with the plans.
- Lets face it-- were doomed.
- [ All Agreeing ]
-[Spinelli] Thats what you thinK!
Kids ofthe playground, meet
your new commanding officer.
Griswald ? He couldnt
lead a glee club.
You find that funny,
Bradley ?
Well, Im not here to makejokes !
Im here to make history !
So ifyou wanna laugh,
take it somewhere else.
But ifyou wanna save the world, then
suck in your gut and stand at attention.
Now whos with me ?
[Kazoos Playing
RiverKwaiMarch]
[ Screams ]
Soda bomb ! Soda bomb !
[Gus] Vince, youandtheAshleys
willbein charge ofunit A.
Ill take unit B.
Spinelli, you get the special forces.
- Special forces ?
- The kindergartners.
- I oweyou for this, Griswald.
- Now theres one last thing
I need to say.
- [ Talking Ceases ]
- This mission is bigger than
any one ofus kids.
Bigger than T.J .
Even bigger than Principal Prickly.
This, my friends,
is about the future.
- Geez, he sounds like T.J .
- Shh. Hes on a roll.
Years from now when kids who arent
even born yet look back on this moment,
theyll say,
They did it.
Those kids saved
3rd Street School.
They saved summervacation.
So, boys and girls,
were goin in.
- Twenty-two minutes to perigee, sir.
- Very good, Fenwick.
[Men Chattering Indistinctly]
- Hello, boys.
- Hey !
[Men Groaning]
[Punches Landing]
- Where now ?
- The auditorium.
Check.
[ Inhales ]
Nessun dorma
[ All ]
Huh ?
Nessun dorma
[Man]
Is thataKid ?
- Ma il mio mistero e chiuso in me
- Hey, kid, get out ofhere !
Aah. Anderson, get rid
ofthat kid, will ya ?
Ilnomemio
nessunsapra
-[AndersonScreaming]
-No, no
- Smithson, Underhill.
- Sir.
Sulla tuaboca
-[MenScreaming]
-Lo diro
- Quando la luce
- Hanklin, Morrissey,
Goodman, get over here !
- Yes, sir.
- Right away, sir. On the double.
Well take care ofhim.
Dont worry about it.
You sure this is
gonna work, Detweiler ?
Come on, Principal Prickly.
Dontyou everwatch old spy movies ?
This trick is pure gold.
Uh, Dr. Benedict wanted to speak to
us about a very important matter.
Hey, you two
arent guards.
Run !
Im called little buttercup
Anderson, Morrissey, Underhill ?
Where is everybody ?
Aah, ifyou want something
done right, you gotta do ityourself.
- Poor little buttercup
- [ Screams ]
- Sweet little buttercup, I
- [ All Shouting ]
Boy, these space-age
power shovels sure do a greatjob.
Quick, in here.
This way !
Theyre inside.
We lost em.
Now what ?
Ammo.
[ Both ]
Tender.
Commence phase two.
Ready ?
- Hey, guards !
- Huh ?
[ Grunting ]
You little brats !
Now !
- Intruders !
- [ Shouting ]
[ All Screaming ]
Scandalous !
[ Shouting Indistinctly]
- Now !
- Huh ?
Bombard, men !
- Get em.
- [ All Shouting ]
[ Screaming ]
Lunch room, front office--
Here it is, auditorium.
[ Loud Hum Resonating ]
Uh, Fenwick,
why is the power off ?
Uh, perhaps
we blew a fuse, sir ?
Well, go fix it !
We must restore the power.
Quickly, here.
Hey, whathappened?
Letus out!
Plans working, Gus.
Good. Now we gotta stop that
laser beam before its too late.
Thats whatyou thinK, Kid.
Youbratsare done for.
[TJ. ]
Hey, baldy!
Sayyour prayers.
Its chowder time.
[ Screaming ]
- Bulls-eye !
- T.J. !
I knewyou guys would
come back for us.
- Ooh, thats gotta hurt.
- Six minutes to perigee !
Quick. To the auditorium.
And no running in the halls !
Emergency power system
is in place.
Switch on the global electrode.
Power up the photon channeler.
Activate the tractor beam, quickly !
Weve only got four minutes left.
[PricKly]
Youvegotnominutes left, Phil.
This is my school
and I want it back.
Sorry, Pete. Yourejust gonna
have to wait until I finish
making the world a better place.
- Now lets get this show on the road.
- Dont do it, Dr. Benedict !
[ Chuckles ] Dont do it ?
You think after all this planning,
all this work, you can get me to
stopjust by saying, Dont do it ?
- What ifwe add please ?
- [ Sighs ] You kids
Just dont get it, doyou ?
Well, let me explain this
in a wayyour little uneducated
brains will understand.
The American public think
test scores are too low.
But ifa person, say me,
could make test scores go up,
why, everybodyd feel better.
They might even elect that person...
President ofthe United States.
Now, doyou have any idea which
countries have the highest test scores ?
- Um,Japan ?
- Germany ?
- Tierra Del Fuego ?
Canada, Iceland, Norway !
And why ? Because its snowing
up there all the time.
Kids dont waste their summers playing
ball. Theyre inside studying.
And that is why Im getting
rid ofsummervacation once and for all.
You got it all wrong, old man.
Your plan will neverwork.
Sure, maybeyour crazy
laser beam can move the moon.
Maybe it can even make it
snow all summer.
Maybeyou can get rid
oflong afternoons playing baseball,
or sunny days down by the lake orwarm
nights camping out under the stars.
But that wont stop us.
Well ride our bikes through the snow.
Well play kick ball in the slush,
well camp out in igloos.
You may take away summer, butyoull
never take away summervacation.
Well, I can try.
Do it... now !
Yes, sir.
Begin photon channeling.
Photon channeling begun.
Setmagnification
coordinates.073.
- Coordinates set.
- Engage tractor beam.
- No !
- [LoudBang]
Hey, teacher,
leave them kids alone !
- Ms. Finster.
- Muriel, its you.
Youre still a vision
ofloveliness.
Yeah ?Andyourestilla two-bit,
recess-hatingprettyboy.
That hurt, Muriel. But Ill forgiveyou
ifyoull just come back to me.
Ha ! Id rather eat
playground dirt.
That can be arranged,
my dear.
Not before I takeyou down.
Take me down ? Yeah, right.
You and what army ?
Me and this army.
The teachers !
[ Shouting ]
[ Karate Shouts ]
Get them !
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
-No, no, no, no, Nobody can do the
-Shimmy
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-ShaKe
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-Boogaloo
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-Shimmy
[Continues]
[ Screaming ]
Fire !
-Letme tellyou, Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
-Nobody
- [ Gasps ]
- Drink soda, ninjas !
Halt !
Flying press !
- Nice flying press, Spinelli.
- Thanks. Ive been working on it.
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no
You !
[Ms. Finster]
Stop right there, KojaK.
Its go time.
-Nobody can do the
-ShaKe
-LiKe Ido, Nobody can do the
-Boogaloo
- Thanks, Ms. Finster.
-Just doing myjob, Detweiler.
Hurry !
Theres still time.
Faster, you idiot !
Faster !
Holditright there, Phillium.
Thesemesters overforyou, pal.
Not so fast, Pete. You might fall asleep
and miss the festivities.
- Hey, Phillium,
theres a spot on your tie.
- Where ?
[NinjaScreams]
- Itsjammed.
- Youre too late, Pete.
This time I win.
Vince !
The photon channeler.
And forget what they told you.
Aim it. Dont throw it.
- Look out ! Shes gonna blow !
- [ All Screaming ]
All my plans,
my hopes and dreams...
ruined.
Ruined !
Getyour hands offthe suit,
you classless feeb !
I am the former
secretary ofeducation.
Yeah, yeah. And Im the former
princess of Morocco. Get in the car.
B-B-But its all his fault.
I was only following orders.
Ill turn states evidence.
Geez, what a squealer.
Come on, Grotke. Ill takeyou on.
My boxing againstyour martial arts.
East meets West.
Well see who wins.
I dont know, Muriel. Im only supposed
to use it for self-defense.
What an exciting summer.
T.J. saved the world...
and Becky made assistant
fry chefat Floppy Burger.
Come on, Ellie. The reporters wanna
talk to us about how we raised a hero.
Listen, Becky, I heard about howyou
saved my life and everything, and...
- well, here, I think this is yours.
- My diary ?
I cant believe it. You realize
this means you dont have
any leverage over me anymore ?
Hey, what can I say ?
Maybe Im just growing up.
Gee, youre an all-right
little brother after all.
But, Teej, what about the
extra copies you got stashed
away up in the tree house ?
Oh, I wasjust bluffing
about those.
So, Teej, we got two weeks
ofsummervacation left.
What doyou saywe do em up right ?
But dontyou guys have to get back
to camp, work on your futures and all ?
Well, weve been thinkin.
And weve decided theres plenty
oftime for preparing for our futures.
But only a little time left
forjust being kids.
So, what doyou saywe head down
to the pond and skip some rocks ?
You guys gotyourselves a deal.
Oh, boy ! My first
summervacation memories.
Uh, guys.
- Ill catch up with you.
I forgot something inside.
- Okay, but hurry.
- Principal Prickly ?
- Huh ?
Oh, its you, Detweiler.
I wasjust, um, cleaning up this mess
Phillium left.
Guyalways wasapacK rat.
Look at this. A Norwegian
weather map from 1 956.
Listen, sir, I never really got a chance
to thankyou for all the stuffyou did.
You know, quitting your golfgame,
telling Benedict to let me go,
helping me save the world
andjunk.
Oh, actually, Detweiler,
Im the one who should be thanking you.
- Huh ?
- You did me a big favor
by dragging me into this mess.
See, I didnt get into teaching for
the promotions or the pension plans...
or so I could get
to the golfcourse by 3:45.
I-- I... did it cause I wanted to
helpyou kids. And Id forgotten that.
- Till today.
- [KnocKing On Window]
- Come on, Teej.
- The pond awaits.
- Ill be there in a second.
- Hey, its a gorgeous summer day
and your pals are waiting.
Go have some fun
whileyou can... Teej.
You got it... Pete.
[RocK nRoll]
But dont forget !
Come September, youre mine.
I havent forgotten
that saggy butt comment.
Hey, September is
a long way off.
Let thesunshine
Let thesunshinein
Thesunshinein
-Let thesunshine
- Whoa, letitshine
-Let thesunshinein
- Come on
- Thesunshinein
-Everybodyjustsingalong
-Let thesunshine
-Let thesunshinein
-Let thesunshinein
- Open upyourheart
andletinshinein
- Thesunshinein
- Whenyourealone
Let thesunshine
[TJ. ]
One, two, three, four.
Dropyour silver
in my tambourine
Help a poor man
build a pretty dream
Give me pennies
Ill take anything
Now listen while I play
[ Echoing ]
My green tambourine
Watch thejinglejangle
start toshine
Reflections ofthemusic
thatismine
Whenyou tossa coin
youllhearitsing
Now listen while I play
[ Echoing ]
My green tambourine
Dropa dime
before I walKaway
Anysongyou want
Illgladlyplay
Money feeds
my music machine
Now listen while I play
[ Echoing ]
My green tambourine
ListenandIllplay
[Echoing]
Mygreen tambourine
ListenandIllplay
[Echoing]
Oh, yeah
Mygreen tambourine
Illplay
mygreen tambourine
Ifyoulisten
I willplay
Mygreen tambourine
[Woman Vocalizing]
Callingoutaroundthe world
Areyouready
forabrand-newbeat
Thesummersnear
andthe timeis right
Fordancing in thestreet
-Dancing in Chicago
-Dancing in thestreet
-Down in NewOrleans
-Dancing in thestreet
-In New YorK City
-Dancing in thestreet
All weneedismusic
Sweetmusic
Therellbemusiceverywhere
Therellbeswinging
andswaying
Andrecordsplaying
Dancing in thestreet
Oh, itdoesntmatter
whatyou wear
Justas long
asyouare there
So, come on
Everyboygrabagirl
Everywherearoundthe world
Therellbe dancing
Were dancing in thestreet
Isaid
wellbe dancing
- Whoo!
-Dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
This isaninvitation
across thenation
A chance forKids tomeet
- Theyllbelaughingandsinging
-Laughing, singing
Andmusicswinging
Were dancing in thestreet
-Philadelphia, P.A.
-Dancing in thestreet
-BaltimoreandD. C. now
-Dancing in thestreet
- Cantforget the MotorCity
-Beep-beep, beep-beep Whoo!
All weneedismusic
Oh, music
Therellbemusiceverywhere
Therellbeswinging
andswaying
Andrecordsplaying
Dancing in thestreet
Oh, itdoesntmatter
whatyou wear
Justas long
asyouare there
Come on
everyboygrabagirl
Everywherearoundthe world
Therellbe dancing
Allaroundthe world
Everyboyandgirl
Dancing in thestreet
-Fromyourneighborhood
down to Hollywood
-Dancing in thestreet
-Dancing in thestreet
-Dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
Were dancing in thestreet
By dannisis, Guatemala
divx@gua.gbm.net