The Sweeter Side of Life (2013) Movie Script

Woke up on a summer day
The birds above
come out to play
They're chirping
outside my window
La da da da
The sun is shining
in the sky
I think I know
the reason why
And it's okay
It's so fine
Everything will
be just fine
It's time to shine
It's a beautiful day
It's a beautiful day
Won't let anything
in the way
No more rain
No more clouds
No more doubt
It's a beautiful day
It's a beautiful day
Won't let anything
in the way
No more rain
No more clouds
No more pain
No more frowns
It's a beautiful day
Andrei, door.
Sure, sure.
Hmm... Mrs. Crosby.
Eating again?
- Hello, Coco.
- Good morning.
- Good morning, Mrs. Harper.
- Hi, Andrei.
Your husband was
out of here early.
- Hmm. Such is the life of a surgeon.
- Yes, indeed.
- Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye.
It's a beautiful day
It's a beautiful day
Won't let anything
in the way
No more rain
No more clouds
No more doubt
It's a beautiful day
It's a beautiful day
Won't let anything
in the way
It's a beautiful day
Oh, my.
What's the weight limit
for Spandex?
120, tops.
- Come on, Desiree!
- Whoo! Whoops!
You call that a punch?
You're hitting
like a girlie girl.
Come on, Desiree!
Come on!
Neutralize your opponent!
Oh. Sorry.
I love it.
Lunch at one?
So, Lana,
tell us about Rudolpho.
Mm. It's Renaldo.
And I just found out he has a wife
and three kids back in Argentina.
Who cares as long as his family
stays over there, right?
I'd care.
Oh, my gosh, it's Dr. Fisher,
best surgeon in town.
Dr. Fisher! Hi!
Oh, Mrs. Harper!
- Let me get your bag.
- Thank you, Andrei.
Oh, they're heavy.
How are you?
Ah, you should see the summer
collection at Coccinelle.
Really. I can't wait.
Mm, blinis and caviar for me.
Hummus and carrots for him.
Dr. Harper's office.
- Hi, Linda.
- Hi, Desiree.
So is my husband
on his way home?
Uh, didn't he text you?
No, no, no,
I didn't get his text.
He had a last-minute
He has a last-minute surgery?
- It was a bunion flare-up.
- Tonight?
Yes, tonight. Would you
like me to leave a message?
Oh. Uh, no, no, um...
no message.
All right.
Happy Anniversary, Wade.
You all right?
Do I look all right?
You know, Desiree,
you shouldn't consume so much dairy.
Oh, really, Doctor?
Who spiked your prune juice?
Well, let me see.
Maybe it's the Cristal
that I had,
by myself, on our anniversary.
Our anniversary?
How could you forget?
I'm leaving you.
I'm in love
with my acupuncturist.
You've been getting
- Yes.
- But...
you hate pain.
It isn't really painful.
It's quite relaxing, actually.
She's very gentle.
I don't care if she puts you
into a tantric coma!
I meant to tell you sooner.
- Sooner? - We've been seeing
each other for eight months.
Well, that's very sneaky of you.
What's her name?
Olive. Like...
the cocktail condiment?
How old is she?
I can see that you're not
taking this very well.
How old is she, Wade?
Just stop before things
get any worse!
"Worse?" How could
things get any worse?
Wade wants a divorce,
and you don't get a dime.
How is that possible?
It's possible because you,
against my vehement protests,
signed a pre-nup,
which is the nastiest,
most malignant piece of one-sided schlock
ever been drafted
on the island of Manhattan.
Thank you, Eddie.
That makes me feel so much better.
Anything else?
Well, yeah.
He's also filed
a restraining order against you.
- What?
- Apparently,
you turned into
some kind of crazed ninja
and tried to strangle him
over his Grape Nuts.
It was All Bran.
Who cares?
It's a nutty thing to do.
And I didn't strangle him.
I don't even know you
anymore, Desiree.
Whatever happened to that
sweet little Jersey girl
that I kissed in the boys' bathroom
back at Flemville Elementary?
Oh, for goodness sakes, Eddie!
We were twelve! You're supposed
to be my lawyer. Do something!
I'm trying. Okay?
I'm in the process of negotiating
the retrieval of your personal
belongings from your former dwelling
in the presence
of a law enforcement officer.
"Former dwelling?"
Yeah. You gotta surrender
your keys to the penthouse.
And the ring.
Let go.
How am I supposed
to sustain myself?
Have you forgotten that your parents
practically hocked the family business
to send you to Columbia?
Maybe it's time
to dust off that MBA of yours.
Perfect. I can just hear
the interview now.
"Oh, what kind of work
experience have you acquired
over the last 15 years
Mrs. Harper?"
"Well, none, but I am quite
an accomplished shopper. "
You have a place to stay?
Crash on my couch.
but my girlfriends
will be fighting over me.
- Morgan.
- What's going on?
- You heard?
- Unbelievable.
Oh, yes! Listen...
We were just leaving
for the country house.
You're going to the
Hamptons? That's perfect!
I can watch your penthouse
while you're gone.
The building doesn't allow
strangers in the apartment.
But surely your husband
would trust me.
How's Wade's throat?
Oh. Uh, Wade's throat is fine.
So he's not pressing charges?
No, he's not pressing charges.
- Hi, Lana. You got my message?
- Uh-huh.
- So I can stay with you?
- No, honey, I'm with Fabio.
- Who's Fabio?
- You know, the one from Spain.
Oh. Well, that's no problem.
You won't even know I'm there.
He cooks in the nude.
Oh. That would be awkward.
Sasha? I'm desperate.
All I'm asking is to sleep
in your maid's room.
That's Fluffy's room.
I don't care
if your cat's in there.
I love Fluffy.
He's so sensitive.
Any little change,
he stops eating.
Listen, missy. Who nursed you
through your last eye job?
I can't believe
you just said that!
Are you blackmailing me?
No, I am not trying
to blackmail you! I would never!
- Well, it sounded like it to me.
- Oh, come...
Hello? Hello?
Out of the road! Get back!
Watch it! Ohh!
May I help you?
I'd like a room, please.
Do you have a reservation?
No, this is
an involuntary visit.
I'm afraid we're sold out.
Can you...
Can you please...
Can you please check?
Just in case.
All right, but I'm
absolutely certain.
Ah! Mr. Pitbull
just canceled.
- Oh!
- So the Imperial Suite is available
at $3,250... per night.
Sold! Oh, you have no idea
what a horrible day I've had.
What I need is
a new pair of shoes,
a hot bath,
and a Porterhouse steak.
I'm terribly sorry.
Your card has been declined.
That's impossible.
It has no credit limit.
Please, try again.
Oh. Yes, right away.
W-What are you doing?
I have been instructed
to destroy your card.
You know, good luck.
It's made out of titanium.
I don't suppose
you'd comp me a room.
I didn't think so.
How 'bout your place?
I was joking!
He's not even my type!
I am calling the credit card
complaint department.
You are all in big trouble!
Oh, no.
I'm so happy to see you.
It's been a long time.
I forgot to pay
that nice cab driver.
Don't worry about that. He hit you.
I don't think they charge for that.
I remember.
I was making a call.
Did you see my phone?
I don't think it made it.
But I can't live without it.
You'd be amazed
at what we can live without.
You may get sleepy, darling.
The doctor gave you
an anti-anxiety agent.
I'm feeling quite alert.
You go ahead and rest,
You'll be as good
as new tomorrow.
I'm so happy you're home.
I missed you.
Breakfast is ready!
Oh... Oh!
- Daddy!
- Good morning, sweetheart.
How you feeling?
A little stiff,
but okay, I guess.
Sit, sit, sit, sit.
There you go.
What's wrong?
You made me pancakes
and Jimmy Dean sausages!
That's your favorite.
This breakfast
is five zillion calories!
Well, don't you want it?
No, I do.
That's the problem.
Daddy, I have
something to tell you.
I know.
Eddie told me about Dick.
It's not Dick. That was
my college boyfriend.
My husband's name
is Wade, remember?
Well, whatever.
If your mother
was still alive...
God rest her soul...
there's no telling what
she would've called him.
I don't understand why
Wade would do this to me.
I was a good wife.
You warned me not to marry him,
but now look at me.
Now I'm just a discarded woman,
like somebody's
disposable razor!
Here, drink some juice.
Why aren't you listening to me?
I am, I am. I'm listening,
I'm listening.
I'm letting you vent.
Darling, everything's
gonna be all right. Believe me.
How am I going
to support myself?
I don't even have a skill.
You have a perfectly good skill.
There you are.
Make you feel better.
Making bread?
It's not just bread.
- It's the staff of life.
- Of life.
I'm sorry
I'm late, Mr. P.
My mother, she had a...
Oh. Hello.
- Dino, this is my daughter.
- Hi.
Dino Ravettino.
Boy, Paddy talks a lot
about you. All good.
Hey, Mr. P,
I'm thinking about trying out a new coffee.
It's called
"cinnamon swirl. "
It sounds good.
I'll brew some up.
Nice to meet you.
You, too.
- He's new.
- He's big.
But surprisingly nimble
in the kitchen.
- Good morning.
- Hey, Moe.
Good morning, Francine.
Morning, Paddy.
Hey, Moe!
How does it go?
Morning, Paddy.
- Hi, Edna. - Paddy, I'm so glad
you finally hired some help.
Did she just call me the help?
This is Desiree, my daughter.
Oh. The one who married
that famous, rich doctor from Manhattan?
How about a loaf
of Irish soda bread?
- It's hot out of the oven.
- Okay, sure.
Hey, boss, I got an order
ready for delivery.
Is Reggie here yet?
No, he's not here yet.
- Oh.
- I read about your husband in OK Magazine.
Did he really do
Britney Spears' surgery?
Excuse me?
Her toe tuck.
- No.
- Her husband
is the cosmetic foot doctor
to the stars.
He specializes
in toe-besity.
So, when's he coming
to Flemington so we can meet him?
He dumped her.
Uh, sorry.
Can I help you?
My name's Calvin.
I'm Reggie's brother.
- Where's Reggie?
- He's at jury duty.
He sent me to make
his deliveries for him.
Fine. Where's your car?
Man, I don't have one.
I'm only fifteen.
Oh, shoot.
- Watch the head.
- Doh!
- All right, you in?
- Dino's in.
He's not in, Dad.
Is Francine okay with this?
- She's fine.
- Looks a little tight.
I don't want to break
her steering wheel.
All right.
Dino out.
- Oh! Ow...
- Oh!
All right, easy, now.
Desiree in.
- What?
- You're in.
No, I'm from Manhattan.
We don't drive.
Of course you do.
I taught you.
Well, that was two decades ago.
Well, you're all we've got.
I'm too old, he's too big,
and he's too young.
Look, it's just like
riding a bicycle.
You get a few blocks, and
it all comes back to you.
Uh, the brake's in the middle.
Okay. I can do this.
I can do this.
Okay, I can do this.
You're doin' great, honey! Keep it up!
- You're beautiful!
- Go! Go, go!
Ah, she's a real sport, Paddy.
Yeah. Just like
her mother.
Come on, you piece of...
Hi. Paddy's Bakery.
- Got it.
- Okay.
Thank you. Thanks.
Hi! Delivery
from Paddy's Bakery.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Look at your car!
Auberge Benoit.
Auberge Benoit.
Sign. A sign.
I ain't got a lot of money
But I want you
to know, honey
I still got
a good life to lead
This is outrageous.
A piece of paradise
in Flemington, New Jersey.
Hey, that's my life!
I want it back!
Shoot, shoot, shoot!
Hi there.
You saw that, didn't you?
- I, uh-I should probably
tell somebody. Right? - Nah.
I don't know.
Do birds really need two stories?
Well, uh...
Hate to hit and run, but, uh,
do you know where I
can leave this bread?
- I'll take it.
- Oh, great.
I got it. Thanks.
Okay. Thanks.
So you're the new
delivery girl?
No, no, I am not
the new delivery girl.
I'm, uh-I...
Never mind.
Okay. I will let you
get back to your gardening.
I'll take those, boss.
Thank you.
- You must be Francine.
- Desiree!
I feel like I know you already.
Paddy must be thrilled
to have you home.
But you're not?
Oh, I just wish home
wasn't in New Jersey.
Oh. Well...
I suppose Flemington is a little
different than what you're used to.
Just a little.
Oh, I brought you your keys.
Thank you for letting us
use your car.
You're welcome. Anytime.
Okay. So...
How's it going, Calvin?
It's going a'ight. Thanks.
I love this game.
I love it, I love it.
Oh, hey, Desiree.
Nice to see you.
Thanks, Moe.
I see you got back alive.
Yeah, but I think I might have
killed the Mini Cooper.
Mr. P, Francine
would forgive you anything,
if you know what I mean.
Huh. What's he
talking about?
Uh, nothing!
Big mouth.
- Sorry, boss.
- Hit me.
So who's minding
the store, guys?
Why? Do we have a customer?
- No.
- Hey.
Eddie called.
Sounded important.
Full house!
- Full house.
- Oh...
You owe me two haircuts,
and you owe me spaghetti.
I'm gonna get you next time.
So, does that work for you two?
- Eddie, that works for me.
- Great.
Okay. I'll get the papers
over to your office.
- Dougie.
- Good to see you.
- Marina.
- Ah. Thank you.
- See you soon.
- Come on, honey.
Eddie Rubinsky.
Were you trying to reach me?
Desiree, I got good news.
Oh. I can move back
into my penthouse?
Help me, Eddie.
I can't live here.
Okay, well, listen.
I talked Wade into dropping
the restraining order,
and they've scheduled
a meeting with you tomorrow
at his lawyer's office.
With me?
Oh, that's good.
That's-I mean...
That's good, right?
Yeah. If you manage to control yourself,
you'll get your clothes back.
Aha! Hallelujah!
Eddie, I gotta call you back.
Yeah, but, De-
Hi, Calvin.
- Everything all right?
- Yeah, this drawer just sprung
when I was trying
to clean up and all.
- It just popped open.
- Well, that's not good.
No, ma'am, it's not.
You worked hard here today.
The place looks nice.
Is your brother gonna be
coming back tomorrow?
I'm sorry to hear that.
Yeah. Do you think maybe Paddy
would let me fill in for him?
I can make deliveries before
school and come back at 3:00.
I could do that for y'all,
if you want.
Plus, m-m-my family
could really use the money.
I think my dad
would be okay with that.
Yeah? Thanks.
- See you tomorrow.
- Yeah.
- Later, Mr. P.
- Good night, Calvin.
Hey, Dad, about Calvin...
- Oh, yeah, he's a good kid, isn't he?
- Yeah, I like him.
we gotta call that guy to fix the register.
It's popping open again.
Desiree, he lost the last hand,
so Dino has to cook dinner.
You're in luck. You know
I make a mean meatball. Hmm?
Oh, yeah, I know.
What game's playing?
The Sox. The Red Sox and the Yankees.
- You got a bet on 'em?
- No betting.
I already owe you a spaghetti.
Oh, it's hit deep to center!
It's going, it's going,
it's gone!
Let's get up and move
- Morning.
- Morning.
I just killed my blow dryer.
Your what?
How am I supposed
to straighten my hair?
Have you seen the dress
I was wearing when I got here?
I washed it for you.
Here it is,
hot out of the dryer.
- The dryer?
- Yeah.
Oh, no, no!
My Missoni!
Maybe we could
wet it, you know, and stretch it back out.
It's not a sea monkey!
It doesn't expand
when you add water!
What am I gonna do now?
I have a meeting with Wade
in two hours,
and I have nothing to wear!
Don't be ridiculous.
You got a whole closet
full of clothes.
I know you think
I'm falling apart
But you rock my heart
Girl, you rock my heart
I know I should
be ready to go
But you rock my heart
You keep on
rockin' my heart
Just imagine
We could make up
and start our life over
This time I would
hold you in my arms
Till the stars
melted into the ocean
But I'll promise
I'll never look up
- Desiree?
- Ohh...
Wow. I almost
didn't recognize you.
What happened?
Okay. Well, can I just say
the '80s have come and gone.
I was just in a meeting
with my business manager,
and he was telling me
all this drama.
Is it true? You and Wade
are really getting divorced?
I don't know.
It's a nightmare.
- I could use a lunch with the girls.
- Sure, honey.
Where are you staying?
The St. Regis?
New Jersey.
I had nowhere else to go.
Oh, yeah. This whole situation
has gotten really tricky,
'cause Wade and I run
in the same social circles,
and he's a member
of my country club and, you know,
but it's like
I've really got to run
'cause I'm late
for my, uh, my facial.
So, bye.
So, lunch this weekend?
Sure. Yeah.
We'll call you.
Hi. How can I help you?
Oh. Hi, Wade.
You look... different.
Are you all right?
Sort of.
I've regained my sanity
since the last time I saw you.
Sorry about the tie grabbing.
No. It was
completely my fault.
Actually, I'm really pleased that we
had a chance to meet before we go in.
I just wanted to tell you
how sorry I am and that I really hope-
Sorry to keep you waiting.
Saul Blinderman.
This is my junior associate,
Nicole Hoffman.
This way, please.
Uh, but my lawyer
isn't here yet.
The receptionist will show him in.
This meeting should be brief since there
is a clear-cut prenuptial agreement
which was signed
willingly by both-
I'm sorry I'm late.
Eddie, are you okay?
Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.
I had a little
cracked tooth back here.
The dentist gave me
a little something.
I feel much better now.
You change your hair?
Mr. Rubinsky,
may we continue, please?
Yeah, sure.
Go ahead.
The prenuptial agreement
clearly states
that Mrs. Harper is only entitled to the
monetary sum and personal belongings
that she entered
into the marriage with.
But it precludes the creation of any
community property after the marriage began-
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bla bla bla.
Excuse me?
Get it together.
We need to reschedule this
for another time.
That doesn't work for us.
Mr. Harper would like
to conclude this as quickly as possible.
I don't understand.
What's the big rush?
Olive is pregnant.
That was exhilarating!
Are you cracked?
My husband is pregnant
with another woman!
Hi. That's right!
Yeah, it's bad.
But it's good for you
in a whole new monetary way.
- Are you kidding?
- Oh! What? What?
Desi, hey! Desi!
What's the problem?
Oh, Giorgio!
Louis. Oh!
I hate to break it to you,
but we're moving to Jersey.
Those are cute, that's all.
They are, aren't they?
Sir, please don't touch that.
I'm not touching it.
That's what's so incomprehensible.
See? Vvvvv!
- Vvvvv!
- Step away from the planet, sir!
It's a little snug.
Oh, trust me, Tamika,
once you lose the bulletproof
vest and let out that side seam,
it's fabulous.
You think so?
Are you sure?
It never fit me right, anyway.
Now for the shoes.
Don't sit.
Don't touch!
Can I look?
- You okay?
- Yeah.
I'm going.
Me, too.
Oh, Officer,
if you ever need a lawyer,
please, call me.
It's time to go, ma'am.
Bye. Thank you.
You are gonna be fine.
This is your life.
Get used to it.
Miss you, Mom.
Let's bake.
Dad's right. Baking does
make you feel better.
Holy moley!
It's the Bride of Chucky.
Uh! This isn't working!
I am not a baker!
My housekeeper buys
my bread at Zabar's!
Would you look at that.
Good morning.
Morning, Calvin.
I got wheels, Mr. P.
I'm ready to roll.
We saw. Very pink.
That's my sister's, man!
I want the fruity one.
I pointed to it first.
Where's Desiree?
For three hours?
Man, I need a spa day.
How you feeling?
Just fine.
Can you wrap these cannolis?
It's what I live for, Dino.
There she is.
- The one that left her husband?
- No!
He left her.
He's a successful doctor.
What a shame. She looks
like such a nice girl.
It's gonna be tough
for a woman her age
to find a new husband
with that kind of annual income.
Practically impossible.
I can hear you.
Maybe she should go
on the Internet.
My cousin's daughter
found a nice rabbi on there.
She'd be better off
in a bar. Mm-hmm.
Well, if I were her,
I'd get on my hands and knees
and beg that handsome doctor
to please take her back.
That's it!
I am not going anywhere.
You hear me?
Not to a bar,
not on the Internet,
and, heaven forbid,
not on my knees
to beg my sneaky, cheating
husband to take me back.
So in case any of you
missed the story of my life,
yes, my husband is having a baby
with his acupuncturist.
No, I don't need a man
for his annual income,
and maybe, if God has any mercy,
you will all get over it
and find something else to talk about!
I think she lost it.
Uh... who's next?
What would you like?
That was certainly different.
You just managed to insult half of Paddy's
best customers in one fell swoop.
- Well, they deserved it.
- Oh, maybe,
but your father didn't.
You know how happy he is
to have you home now?
He's really missed you.
I know.
I've missed him, too.
I tried to get back to visit.
It's been five years.
You can't have tried very hard.
But no matter.
Paddy would give you the world if he could.
And despite
their misguided ways,
those people in there
just wanted to help you, too.
It's what folk do around here.
They help each other.
And instead of being grateful,
you strut around with
your Fifth Avenue attitude
and your lousy work ethic.
If you just looked around
you might realize
that Paddy can't even afford
the job he's given you.
I had no idea.
Because you didn't
bother asking.
How are things going here?
Oh, fine. Why?
I was just going over
your numbers, and-
Here, try that.
- Huh.
- Mm!
It's not looking good.
You do a decent business
in the morning,
but the rest of the day,
it's absolutely dead.
- What about that potato bread?
- It's delicious.
Needs a tad more sea salt.
- You think so?
- Yeah.
Oh, maybe, maybe a touch.
I'm talking about the future
of Paddy's Bakery here.
I keep tellin' him.
We need to modernize. Don't I, Mr. P?
I'm too old to be modern.
Maybe we could put a little
sitting area out front.
We could jazz up
the place a little bit.
We could offer
designer coffees.
My cousin's got a used
cappuccino machine he's selling.
I could get it for a steal.
- Perfect!
- What y'all need to do is get
some new tunes, man,
for us young people.
- Great idea.
- Whoa. Wait a minute.
I don't know about that.
Come on, Daddy.
I can make this work.
Let me show you what I learned at that
expensive university you paid for.
I promise you,
I won't steer you wrong.
Oh. Oh, well, maybe.
Well, all right.
I got it.
- Yes!
- Yeah.
- Delicious.
- Ha ha! Whoo!
Ow! Mm, one second.
I broke a nail. I don't believe it!
You want me to call someone?
Oh. You again.
We never formally met.
I'm Benny.
As in Benoit's.
Oh, and you're the chef.
And the owner?
Well, technically speaking,
the place belongs to my family.
My mother's French,
my father's English.
My mother's
eccentric great-uncle
decided to build a chateau
in the middle of New Jersey.
No one else in the family wanted to
restore it, but I did, so here I am.
In good old Flemington.
I take it you prefer Manhattan.
How do you know that?
Well, it's a small town.
Can I get you something?
Uh, yeah, yeah.
I just came to, um,
settle my account for the month.
Would you like a receipt?
Yes, please.
That's a lot of baguettes.
What I'd really like
is your phone number.
Oh, uh, hi, Benny.
Hi, Paddy.
I don't have a number.
My phone was killed by a taxi
in front of a five-star hotel,
but even if I, if I...
if I did,
I am in a transitional state
and emotionally unavailable at this time.
Well, in that case,
I'll just take the receipt.
Au revoir.
Yeah, I don't even know
what that means.
You can come out now.
Yeah, well, we were just, uh...
Just keep walking.
- Let's go see what Moe's up to.
- Keep walking.
Yep, I'm walking. Walking.
Wait a minute.
Don't you have a good
Irish jig or something-
Oh. Little cakes! Hey.
- Want to taste?
- Oh, please.
Wow. Mm.
Mm. Whoa.
Oh, oh, that's good.
I taste real vanilla bean.
- Yep. My mother's recipe.
- Ah.
But a mini version.
Beautiful. Thank you.
It was a Tuesday
It was 'bout two weeks ago
We went along a rocky
flower-coated mountain road
He spun me 'round
so fast-
Excuse me.
Sorry about that.
We're still working
on our playlist.
Well, I would take
that one off.
Yeah, I agree.
How can I help you?
You can tell me how to
get back on the turnpike.
I can.
What do you think, Francine?
I prefer Jay-Z.
You'll see the entrance
on the left.
Thank you.
You're a lifesaver.
And take one of these
for the road.
To make up
for the music assault.
What a cute idea.
They're new. I thought
I'd call them paddycakes.
Great name.
Thank you.
Great dress. Gaultier?
You know your designers.
It was a weakness of mine.
Thanks again.
Here we go.
A little something
by The Midnite Snacks.
- It's nice, right?
- Yeah.
Ah. Okay.
Hey, come on.
It's Friday night
in my neighborhood
Me and my boys
gonna make it last
We got some money
'cause we just got paid
It's time to hit it hard
and time to play
It's funny!
Oh, God. Ah.
Uh, notice anything different?
Oh, wow!
You look great!
- For you, handsome. That's right.
- Oh, a new cap!
- Check it out!
- These are tight.
- What do you think?
- Oh, no, those are good.
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
For me, for you
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's a good life
It's true
Come on.
We got work to do, boys.
- Bye!
- Bye!
That's a foofie cup.
I know. Coffee
just tastes better in a cup like this.
Oh, good grief.
Hi there.
Nice painting.
Nice, uh, nice tray.
So, how's everything
going at the bakery?
Great, great.
I hear you're
selling cappuccinos now.
And, um, something
called a paddycake?
I still can't call you, can I?
- No.
- I didn't think so.
- Uh-oh.
- Paddy.
Give me a hand, would ya?
- It's stuck.
- Oh, not again.
This joint is jumpin'!
You're gonna love it.
Really good.
Here you go. Tell me
how you like it. Okay?
It's all good stuff there.
Flavor of the day
is passion fruit. Few of those?
Must be the music.
Hey, Mr. Kerrigan.
Hi, Eddie.
Desiree, I am really sorry about
botching the meeting with Wade.
Would you accept this free phone
that I got with my rollover minutes
as a peace offering?
Thanks, Eddie.
- Of course I forgive you.
- Hey.
Hey, guys.
It's Friday night.
So what are we all doing, huh?
Come on, baby!
You still got it, Dad.
Go on, Eddie.
Give her a crack.
- Okay.
- Come on, Eddie.
Calvin, Hobbes,
watch and learn.
Oh. Oh!
Chicken cacciatore!
So how come you didn't
ask Francine to come out?
Francine? Uh, uh...
She's busy.
Come on.
Sweetheart, I, uh...
I'm just not ready yet.
Sure you are.
You just don't know it.
At least try to go out
on one casual date.
Listen. Let me make
a deal with you, okay?
I will if you will.
- Yeah?
- All right. You have a deal.
There's Benny.
- Go on.
- Oh.
- No.
- Come on, now. A deal's a deal.
Go ahead. Go on!
- Oh.
- Oh.
Sorry, I...
Sorry to startle you.
No, not at all.
It's nice to see you
out and about.
Yeah, I live to bowl.
Here's my number.
Hey, Benny!
Hey, Cat.
- Nice to see you.
- You, too.
Desiree, this is Cat.
Cat, Desiree.
Hi. You're very pretty.
Great jeans.
I gotta go.
That was so stupid!
Well, I cannot believe...
What are you doing?
Just shut up and pretend
we're together.
- Okay.
- She struck out with Benny.
- Don't point.
- Who's the hottie?
I'm such an idiot.
- He has a girlfriend.
- No, no, no. You got it all wrong.
Cat's not with Benny.
She's with Johnny.
Ow! Hey, I'm sorry, Mr. P.
Excuse me.
Excuse me. Sorry.
Hey! What's
she doin'?
We regulars have seniority.
- Okay, that's fine, but...
- Isn't that right, Desiree?
- Just a few minutes...
- Get to the back of the line!
Thank you.
It's on the house.
- Thank you, Desiree.
- You're welcome.
Thank you, Stella.
Thank you, sweetie.
We need more paddycakes.
They're animals out there.
Hey, that's the way I like it.
When does Calvin get back?
Who knows?
Oh, thank goodness.
- We need your help.
- How long has business been like this?
Since today.
Eddie, don't just stand there.
Do something.
Like what?
Wash the pans.
I don't do dishes!
I make $600 an hour soaking
rich people in Manhattan!
Let me clear off these.
I'll be right back.
Well, hello, ladies.
I'm not really a waiter.
I'm actually rich and powerful.
I live on Central Park West.
See that Benz there?
It's mine.
No? Okay.
Looks good, looks good.
There you go, June.
Thank you.
Everybody, I'm sorry.
We're sold out.
Okay, tomorrow, tomorrow.
Please come back.
Thank you, Joyce.
I'll have a dozen
for you, okay?
Ah, we're closed.
- Thank the Lord!
- Man, that was crazy.
You know, this has been
the biggest day
in the history of this bakery.
Hi! Have you seen this?
What's that?
What's this?
"Life Just Got Sweeter On
The Other Side Of The River. "
They're calling Paddy's Bakery
"a little slice of nirvana. "
Ooh, that's nice.
It talks about
you, too, Desiree.
They love your paddycakes!
- How did they find us?
- Yeah.
It's the Gaultier girl!
We're famous!
Thanks for coming out.
You're welcome, kiddo.
Would you mind dropping
these off to Andrei, my old doorman?
Don't worry. I'm gonna have you
living back in the city in no time.
Mwah! I got ideas.
All right.
- See you soon.
- Drive safe.
I will.
Desiree, Benny called earlier.
He did?
He asked us out.
He asked who out?
All of us.
Watch your step.
You know, sometimes the
cement will attack you!
Hello, hello!
Welcome to my humble abode!
Ah, lovely to see you.
Thank you, Francine.
Thank you.
Please. That's great.
- I'll put this in the kitchen.
- Thanks, Paddy.
That's very kind of you.
Thank you very much.
- Make yourselves at home now.
- Benny, how ya doin'?
- Dino, good to see you.
- Good to see you.
- Thanks for coming.
- I'll put this in the fridge.
Thank you, thank you.
You know where you're going.
You shouldn't have.
I should have.
I'll put it
somewhere safe. Come on.
- You look beautiful.
- Thank you.
I didn't have your number,
so I called your dad.
This is my uncle's wine
from Sicily.
- Oh!
- It's wonderful.
- I have to try that.
- Merci bien, Elena.
- Smells so good.
- Thank you, thank you.
I hope you enjoy it.
Um, to your very good health.
It's really lovely
to have you all here.
It means a lot to me.
Thank you. Cheers.
So much. Salute.
It's my pleasure.
- Mm, fantastic.
- Oh.
this is probably the best chicken
I've ever eaten in my whole life.
Well, thank you, Paddy,
but it's not chicken.
It's not?
It's frog's legs, Paddy.
What the heck, ya know?
As long as it doesn't hop off the plate.
No, no, I disagree.
Opera should only be
sung in Italian.
It's the most romantic
language in the world, huh?
Yeah, but the French,
they sing the best love songs.
Well, yeah, I think
you're both crazy.
'Cause the best thing
in the world is a good Irish jig.
An Irish jig?
I know how to settle this.
Way, hey, and away, yah
We'll pay Paddy Doyle
for his boots
We'll bunt up the sail
with a fling, yah
And pay Paddy Doyle
for his boots
Thank you for this.
My father hasn't been
on a date in seven years.
It's my pleasure.
Would you like a quick tour?
- I'd love one.
- Come on.
Way, hey, and away, yah
We'll pay Paddy Doyle
for his boots
Ah, yes, so the guests
all stay up there,
and, um, this is where I live.
That's an elevator in there,
but it doesn't work.
And in there is the library.
Lots of books.
I love books.
You love books?
I love books.
Oh, that's my office in there,
but it's a little disorganized.
You don't want to look in that.
How is it that you don't
have a significant other?
- Oh, I did have. She was French.
- Oh.
She hated New Jersey. In the end,
she didn't care for me much either.
Ah, French girls are tough.
- Oh, wow.
- Yeah.
Oh, that's my great uncle.
Just ignore him.
Perhaps we should
continue the tour.
- Uh, we have a problem.
- What is it?
We've run out of hallway.
And they've stopped singing.
Benny, come on down here!
It's your turn now!
Yeah! Come on!
- Rain check?
- Absolutely.
- We need more coconut cream.
- Already?
Oh, wow!
That's a good thing.
Any calls?
It's only been two days.
It's too soon
for Benny to call.
Yeah, that would violate
the three-day rule.
Yeah, man. Women like it
when you make them wait.
I got a news flash for you men.
The three-day rule is stupid.
Women don't like it.
It just makes us angry.
I don't care what happens.
Do not call Benny.
I'm not.
- Just relax.
- Yeah, man, chill.
I am the queen of chill!
I could care less
if Benny calls or not.
I mean, Desiree here.
I'm a genius.
It's Eddie.
Hi. Look,
we're very busy here.
What is it?
I would love
to buy you a hot dog.
No, not you, Desiree.
How 'bout a pretzel?
Eddie, focus.
- No...
- Yo, what are you doin'?
Come on! You're
scaring off my customers!
Give me one of those.
- Look, I'm hanging up, Eddie.
- Desiree, wait!
Keep the change.
I got you
a Willy Wonka of a deal,
and you're gonna love it!
Zwieback International
wants to franchise
Paddy's Bakery.
Are you serious?
Yeah! They're going crazy over
the whole paddycakes thing.
We can talk about
my commission later.
We gotta move fast,
while I got 'em salivating.
Hang on. Daddy...
Zwieback wants to
franchise the bakery.
They want to meet
with us Friday.
Great. Get me
the flour, sweetheart.
Did you hear me?
Yeah, I heard you.
Look, I'm not going
to the big city. You go.
We're on.
Great. Oh, and, Desiree,
they're gonna pick you up.
Hey, Daddy, are you sure
you're okay with me negotiating for you?
Well, of course.
It's just...
It's your bakery, and this is a huge deal.
Sweetheart, it's not my bakery.
It's our bakery.
Thank you for saying that.
I just hope I don't mess it up.
You won't.
How do you know?
Because you're a Kerrigan.
Now, go get 'em, tiger.
Good luck, darlin'!
"Saw the article.
Us girls want to have drinks. "
Ah! Perfect.
"See you at 5."
Look out, New York.
I'm back.
- Okay, they're ready for you.
- All right.
Hey, Benny must be
pretty busy, huh?
- He went to Paris.
- Paris?
It was an unexpected trip.
Gabrielle had
some sort of crisis.
Have a safe flight.
Uh, thanks.
- Oh.
- Mm.
Marcus Kelly Macaroons.
One of our franchises.
So, Mrs. Harper...
Please, call me Desiree.
Of course.
Desiree, we do things
differently here at Zwieback International.
Anyone can franchise
a successful product,
but can they capture
the atmosphere
of love and caring that
has become the very essence
of what Paddy's Bakery
stands for?
Picture this:
The quintessential
family bakery,
established in 1892,
bringing a little slice
of home to the big city.
We have a deal memo here
for you to sign. James?
I'm sure you'll find our offer
more than satisfactory.
In addition
to the signing bonus,
Desiree will have the title
of co-executive director.
Mm. With my father.
Well, we would be happy
to discuss a minimal involvement for him.
Well, Desiree,
with all due respect,
he is in his sunset years,
and we are launching a new
contemporary franchise.
Yeah, we really want to push
the envelope on this one.
And push my father out
in the process?
Well, we'd keep him on
for the first few months.
- A few months?
- Whoa, whoa, come on.
Yeah, wait, wait, wait.
What happened here?
Just a minute ago, you had us
picturing Paddy's Bakery
as a snug, cozy
little slice of home.
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
but the twist is there's no room for dad.
May I suggest you have
another look at the offer.
Don't look at it.
I'm sure your father
would be happy retiring
in sunny Florida
with a big fat check.
See, that's where you're wrong.
Because your greedy gluttonous
muffins will come and go,
but my father is Paddy's Bakery,
and he is very happy
working in Flemington.
So what does this mean?
Sorry, gentlemen,
but we have no deal.
I'm just gonna take these.
Desiree, I can't believe I'm saying this,
but you did the right thing.
Thanks, Eddie.
- Hey.
- Hello there.
No, no, no, no.
Excuse me. We ordered Bellinis.
That is champagne
with white peaches, not yellow.
Don't think he understood me.
Sorry, Desiree.
This place has really gone to the natives.
So are you on your way?
I don't think I can make it.
What happened? I thought you were
staying in town to shop for apartments?
You know, suddenly
I've changed my mind.
Because I don't fit
in here anymore.
And you know what?
I don't want to.
So, now what?
I'm going home.
Watch your head, ma'am.
This way.
I had to see you.
How did you know I was here?
I called the bakery.
Desiree. I'm sorry.
Olive dumped you, didn't she?
- Yeah.
- Ha! And a baby on the way?
- A false alarm.
- Oh, big surprise there.
I know I screwed up,
but just give us a second chance.
We can have
a beautiful life together.
We had a beautiful
life together, Wade.
It wasn't enough for you.
When did you get this?
I had a momentary
midlife crisis.
It won't happen again.
But isn't it gorgeous?
Come on. Now, let me
take you back home.
To Manhattan, where you belong.
Things have changed
for me now, Wade.
All right.
At least let me drive you
to the bakery. Come on.
All right.
You're gonna love it. Hmm?
That's it.
You'll see, Desiree.
I'm not the selfish idiot
I used to be.
I've changed.
Son of-
I didn't see you coming.
I'm so sorry.
You better be, big boy.
That's a $285,000 Ferrari!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Okay, okay.
- Wade!
What are doing?
Leave Benny alone!
- You know this idiot?
- Yes!
- Hi.
- Hi.
How is Gabrielle?
My mother?
She's fine now.
Hello? Do I
look like I care?
- Did you say your mother?
- Yeah.
Desiree, would you get
back in the car, please?
I've changed my mind, Wade.
What's wrong with you?
You have a perfectly simple decision.
You either take
the high life or the low life!
- You're the lowlife.
- Hey.
Don't you think you've
embarrassed yourself enough already?
Back off, baguette boy!
You back off, bucko!
Ow! Ooh!
- You... You hit him!
- Uh-huh.
I need to find a better place
for that birdhouse.
I've got it, thanks.
Yep, in front of
all of my customers.
I don't think I've ever
felt so... emasculated.
Yeah. Sorry.
Is there something
I could do to help restore your reputation?
Well, since you asked.
I'm sorry, Daddy.
There is no franchise deal.
I know. Eddie called.
You do realize that,
if you'd have signed that deal,
you'd have your life back
on Fifth Avenue right now?
It wasn't worth it.
Thank you for not
selling your daddy out.
I'm so proud of you.
That means more to me than
any penthouse on any avenue.
I love you, Daddy.
Good girl.
Desiree, you did
the right thing by Mr. P.
- Good job.
- And that is something to celebrate.
It is.
Calvin, let's have some music.
You got it, Mr. P.
Hey! I'm sorry I'm late.
Us peons had to drive.
- Eddie!
- Plus, I had to pick up my date.
- Ooh-whoo!
- Tamika! Look at you!
You are a goddess.
You were right. Once I lost the
bulletproof vest, it fit like a glove.
So when did you two happen?
Well, I could ask
you two the same thing.
Well, it's party time!
What are you thinking?
You know, life is sweeter on
the other side of the river.
Come on, everybody!
You stole my light
I'm so upset
My heart's a wreck
I'm one whole mess
Get me out
I'm up all night
Why can't I
turn out the light
All night, all night
All night, all night
All night, all night
All night, all night
I'm up all night
Why can't I
turn out the light