Yamla Pagla Deewana 2 (2013) Movie Script

Nutty! Looney! Crazy!
Nutty! Looney! Crazy!
Nutty! Looney! Crazy!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
What God!
You know that I'm getting
late for Harry Johal's meeting.
You too?!
What God!
I do everything for you.
You take the credit as well.
Then you do this to me, huh!
Not fair! Not fair!
Hey, do you want a lift?
Yeah, but I want to go that way.
Yeah. Hop in.
Jump in.
Oh, my God!
- How did that happen!
How did that car start?!
Only God knows!
Anyway, thanks.
- It's alright. Bye.
Jealous, huh?
Mr. Johal! Thank God I'm on time!
Why did you jump?
Why did you save me?
My wife ran away with my best friend.
My best friend was my ad
agency's creative director.
He took my wife as
well as my business!
I'm fcc d!
Oh God!
Mr. Johal.
Death isn't the solution.
Staying alive won't help either.
Tomorrow I've to pitch an ad
campaign to a renowned company.
It was my last chance. I'm finished.
And on top of that you are
here for the loan's recovery.
I don't want to be alive. I want to...
What's the product?
Are you ready, Paramveer?
- Yes. Yes.
Roll sound.
Roll camera.
D'ole energy drink.
Lift 2.5 tons with ease.
My dear devotees...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy...
This mantra was generated by my soul.
Nutty, who has
surrendered himself to the Lord.
Looney, a wanderer, distanced
from the attractions of this world...
...immersed in the Lord's devotion.
Crazy, someone who
loves the Lord so much...
...that even the Lord
becomes his disciple.
If this great mantra
has touched your soul...
...then accept this
mantra into your life.
And sing this from your heart...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy...
- Nutty, Looney, Crazy...
Come to me.
Come to me.
- Oh, noble sage...
Please save me.
Please save me.
I can feel your pain, my son.
Get rid of the burden you
have on your body and soul.
Give it up.
Let go of it.
Let go.
Why are you staring at me?
Throw your chain,
watch and otherjewelry.
Oh, my God! What is he doing?
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
I feel light, sage. I feel light.
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live.
- Long live, Sage Nutty!
Ready? We are going to get
lots of things today. - Yes.
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Slowly. Slowly. Slowly.
Long live, Sage Nutty!
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, noble sage!
Get up.
Get up, my devotee.
Who are you, my child?
I'm Sir Yograj Khanna.
I've come from England.
Show me your right hand.
Now show me your left hand.
What's the time?
I can see it.
I can see it.
I saw it.
Wealth, the one who has it is sad.
And the one who
doesn't have it is also sad.
Right. Absolutely right.
You know it all.
Don't worry.
Soon, a noble soul
will enter your life.
He'll rid you off all your worries.
Oh, noble sage!
Brother Gajodhar...
I've already sold this one.
Hey, the bullet holes I'll
put in you will confuse you...
...as from where to
breathe and from where to...
Got it?
Hey, you 'Dabang' thief!
Give my Salman back to me!
It was yours.
But now it's mine.
I've watched 'Dabang' 70 times.
And I've watched it 170 times.
I've watched 'Hum Apke
Hain Kaun' 200 times.
And I've watched it 250 times.
I've watched 'Maine
Pyar Kiya' 300 times.
There's a reason why my name is Suman.
And I've watched it a 1000 times.
That's why everyone
affectionately calls me Prem.
I can give up my life but not Salman.
I'll kill you!
I won't spare you!
My trident!
Ma'am, you shouldn't be so
angry with your husband.
He isn't my husband.
Here, only wives make their
husband run on the streets.
Stay happily married.
Hello, Mr. Jindal.
Hi, Paramveer. How are you doing?
- Great.
Harry Johal has started
paying the installments.
Your energy drink is causing wonders.
Thank you, sir.
God knows how you do it.
He knows.
Now, I've another assignment for you.
Tell me, what do I have to lift now?
One of our bank's oldest clients.
A few years ago I sanctioned a
loan of 10 million pounds to him.
But all of a sudden he has
stopped paying the installments.
Which is very unlike him.
And it has the bank worried.
You go and find out in your own
style as to what his problem is.
And see if you can
help recover the loan.
Sir, Mr. Dharam Oberoi...
...is the owner of Oberoi, Oberoi
and Oberoi group of industries.
He's one of the top
shots of this country.
All his royal guests come in this car.
If someone pleases him,
he gifts him a palace.
Mr. Oberoi, how did
you and your mistress...
...manage to do all this
without breaking any bones?
Very funny.
But if this is uploaded on YouTube...
And if your wife sees it,
then it's not funny.
No! Don't do that.
My wife will disown me if
she finds out about this.
I'm ready to do anything.
- Anything, huh?
Look at this place.
This palace can belong to you.
Oberoi greetings.
Oh my God.
Oberoi greetings.
Oberoi greetings.
Delighted to meet you, Mr. Oberoi.
Sir Yograj Khanna.
We have met thanks to
the great Sage Nutty.
The one who gets his blessings...
...ls blessed for life.
Open your eyes and come inside.
Oh, I am.
Oh, thank you very much.
Alright, Mr. Oberoi,
I would like to know...
...what has been your
financial strategy...
...during the worldwide recession.
Such an easy question! Even
my butler can answer that.
Mr. Oberoi has invested
in inexpensive stocks...
...keeping in mind the capital
market equation of this country.
He looks at the internal rate of
return, sensitivity, volatility...
...because he formally believes
Warren-Buffett school of management.
Pappu cleared the test?
Yes. From where?
London school of economics.
And Suzanne, hear from
where she graduated as well.
Paris school of fashion.
Paris! Oui, madame.
Suzy, iron my suit.
- Yes, sir.
Pappu charge my computer.
- Dad...
Sir Yograj Khanna from UK.
Yograj Khanna, my son Prem.
The heir of my empire.
- Oberoi greetings.
Oberoi greetings.
Dad, Malu Group's guys are waiting
for you for the video conference.
The one who wants to
do the 5 billion deal.
Mr. Rajendra Malu?
The solar energy guys?
Request them to do it tomorrow.
I've a guest today.
Mr. Oberoi, it's alright.
Okay. Please carry on.
However, I would like
to take your leave now.
My daughter is waiting for me.
Oh. As you please.
Thank you so much.
If both of you could make it to
my hotel tomorrow for breakfast...
I would really be very-very honored.
I don't think I can make it tomorrow.
I've a lot of
appointments scheduled for tomorrow.
Oh, Mr. Oberoi, please.
We will try.
- Oh, thank you very much.
Oberoi greetings.
- Oberoi greetings.
Thank you very much.
Prince Gajodhar...
- Yes, King Dharam...
Warm up. This
scapegoat has a daughter, too.
Please get me some...
- Beans, sir?
We have some fantastic croissants.
Yes, hash brownies.
Would you like some fruits?
That will be all, sir?
That's it, thank you.
So, my child, enjoying?
Yeah, it's nice.
Gajodhar, somehow, anyhow trap her.
This lottery...
Is very beautiful.
What do you say?
Where did he go?
I wish your son could
have accompanied you.
He had a very
important appointment to keep.
Work is worship for Prem.
Prem! Nice name!
My name is Prem. Prem!
She seems to be a huge fan of Salman.
Yes, uncle.
Hello? Yes, son.
Everyone is missing you.
Dharam, I fought with
that witch yesterday.
But why?
We had a scene
because of Salman's photo.
Salman, Salim...
They are like families.
It's a small issue. Sort it out.
But we should lock
this deal at any cost.
It's the question of our prestige.
But what will I do now?
Change your strategy, son.
The 70s' formula.
Dharam, you are a
scoundrel of the worst kind.
Perfect shot.
You've hit bang on target!
Take this, sweetheart.
She's hot!
I can see that.
In life, never
underestimate three people...
Chulbul Pandey, Tiger and...
Prem Oberoi.
Who's Prem Oberoi?
I am Prem Oberoi.
Over here!
- Over here! - Over here!
Me! Me!
Move! Move!
What are you doing?
She's good, she's wise!
This girl is nice!
She rules my heart.
I want her to be my sweetheart!
She's good, she's wise!
This girl is nice!
She rules my heart.
I want her to be my sweetheart!
I've her photo hanging
on the wall of my heart!
You look like my
dream girl, beautiful.
I want to make you mine!
In your love, I stay busy!
This work is difficult,
it's not easy!
In your love, I stay busy!
This work is difficult,
it's not easy!
I fell in love.
I fell so hard.
You gave me a sign.
And I crossed all lines.
I fell in love.
I fell so hard.
You gave me a sign.
And I crossed all lines.
I spend sleepless nights.
And from this
restlessness there is no respite.
In your love, I stay busy!
This work is difficult,
it's not easy!
In your love, I stay busy!
This work is difficult,
it's not easy!
In your love, I stay busy!
This work is difficult,
it's not easy!
To you...
To you...
To you...
Did you hear the To you... song?
- To you...
A sign of true love.
Yes, I heard!
I heard.
I love you, Prem.
Suman, Prem.
Prem, Suman.
Oh, it looks like the movie
'Maine Pyar Kiya' has begun.
We are in this together.
Sage Nutty's screenplay was a success.
Khanna is so happy he is
going Nutty, Looney and Crazy!
He says he'll get his
daughter engaged to Gajodhar in UK.
Now I'll go and swindle
people where I was born.
We dream of...
- Money! Money!
Paramveer is calling!
All set?
Hi, Paramveer.
- Hi.
No Sikh is as handsome as my son.
So true.
- How are you, son?
I'm absolutely fine, dad.
How are you?
- Absolutely fine.
Fooling around.
He means his florist
business is doing well.
Brother, is my order ready?
Bouquet. Give him a bouquet.
- Yes.
Here you go.
- 500?
It feels so nice to see
you both work so hard.
You were right, brother.
One might not make a lot
of money working hard...
...but he surely gets a
lot of peace of mind.
But, son, there's
something that hurts me a lot.
You send us half of
your salary every month.
It's my duty, dad.
I don't want you to start
swindling again for the need of money.
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!
I won't be able to do that anymore.
Son, wipe your face.
Param, we want to go on a pilgrimage.
On a pilgrimage? But you
guys are already in Banaras.
Everyone goes to Banaras
for a pilgrimage and...
Brother, the thing is...
We have committed so many sins...
That if we take a dip in the Ganges...
Then it won't be able to
wash anyone else's sins.
That's why we want to
go somewhere far away.
Fine, dad. I'll send some money.
Bless you, son. Bless you.
Oh yes, Param...
We might face a
network problem over there.
- Hence don't get worried.
- Okay, dad.
But call me as soon as you return.
Yes. Yes, of course.
- Bye, dad.
Bye. Love you, son.
- Bye.
Love you.
Poor guy.
Dharam, you are a...
Thank you, God. Both of
them have mended their ways.
I think your bell isn't working.
'T-minus 10, 9, 8... '
'7, 6, 5, going for
the main entrance! Fire! '
Long live Dude-G!
Long live Dude-G!
Long live Dude-G!
Long live Dude-G!
Long live Dude-G!
Long live Dude-G!
Even the stars indicate that
my dream is about to come true.
Joginder Armstrong's dream!
World's biggest mall!
Universal mall!
The world's first
gravity defying, rotating mall.
A mall so big that people will
travel in small space capsules.
What an idea, Dude-G!
That's because Dude is a genius.
But remember, this mall
won't be just a mall...
It will be the 8th
wonder of this world.
The 8th wonder of this world.
Making which Dude will be...
- A part of history.
Not a part, but the
part and parcel of it.
Hey, that was ajoke!
Come on! Come on! Come on!
Loud. Loud. Loud. Clap. Clap. Clap.
But it's sad that I
still haven't got...
...the auspicious place
shown to me by Space Pundit.
I want 22, Sunny Street at any cost!
Get out!
Come on, clap.
Recognize me!
From where have I come!
Who am I!
Charlie Chaplin?
Wild cat!
Everyone out in five minutes!
Where's Khanna the owner of
this club and the shops outside?
Where is...
- Run from here! Run!
Who's over there?
The one who is hiding, show yourself.
Don't hurt me by hiding yourself.
Come out. Come out.
Come on.
I had told you to leave.
I was leaving but he stopped me.
Who stopped you?
Wait, please.
Excuse me, what is your name?
He isn't telling me.
He isn't?
- No.
Then what is your name?
Oh, my name is Sir Yograj Khanna.
So you are Khanna.
- Yes, I am.
So where were you going?
You asked me to leave
hence I was leaving.
Acting smart, huh?
You don't know who I am!
I'm your death!
You don't know where I have come from!
And who am I!
You came through the gate,
and who are you?
It's not difficult,
but impossible to get hold of me.
Don. Don. Don.
Don't. Don't. Don't.
Don't. Don't. Don't.
Down. Down. Down.
Down. Down. Down.
Just a minute.
God's he's Your manufacturing defect.
Shall I repair him?
What was that?
I was seeking permission.
From whom?
- From God.
Did you get the permission?
I like it.
No, no, no!
Please forgive me. Please forgive me.
Let's go! Let's go!
At least now tell me
what your name is!
Paramveer. Oh, my God!
- Paramveer!
- Paramveer!
My elder brother's
name was also Paramveer!
Yes, Paramveer!
He was the Robin Hood of this place.
The Robin Hood.
Now Robin is no more, what
remains is just the hood.
When he was alive no one
would dare to come here.
Thank you very much
for saving all of us.
Thank you.
It feels as if my
elder brother has returned.
He's come back.
Oh, Paramveer!
Okay! Okay!
Now Dude is pissed!
Really, really pissed!
Bunty, Babli, how
many guys where there?
Just one Singh.
Jaswant Singh?
So his name is Jaswant Singh?
Just one Singh.
One Sikh gentleman.
One Sikh gentleman?
So whom does he work for?
For Lord.
Even Lord Real Estate
guys want the same place?
Dude's place?
- No! - What's this nonsense?
Not Lord the Real Estate.
Real Lord. The Lord up there.
He takes direct orders from God.
- Right? - Yes.
After seeing him I
was like Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Hey, you! Look at me! Look at me!
Talk to me. Talk to me. Talk to me.
What's your name? Bunty or Babli?
Bunty. - Bunty? Talk to me.
Tell me. Tell me your problem.
Dude-G, I used to say that
superheroes exist, right?
But he's a Super Sikh.
Super. Super.
Hey, stop this,
Super, super bullshit.
No Super Sikh can stop the
Dude's Universal mall's rotation.
Like you need iron
to cut through iron...
...you need a Sikh to
get rid of a Sikh. - Oh.
Call up Kartar in Canada.
Oh yes.
- K... K...
Complete it. Complete it.
What are you trying to say?
- Kartar!
Yeah. Now it's better.
- Phone. Yes.
How's it going, Paramveer?
Great, sir.
Mr. Khanna has offered me
ajob to be his manager.
You surely must've worked
your wonders there as well.
So, when's the check coming in?
This time it will take some
time for the check to come.
That's fine by me.
As long as it comes in.
Better late than never.
All the best.
- Okay.
Param, in life, I've seen many
millionaires and billionaires.
But I've seen no one like the Oberois.
They have wealth, but
they have intellect as well.
Even their servants have studied
in London school of economics.
- Yeah.
But now they will realize how smart
and intelligent my club's manager is.
...and intelligent my
club's manager is.
Thank you, sir.
I'll try my best to impress them.
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
Thank you.
Quiet! Quiet!
Param, come over here! Come over here!
Come, my boy. Come.
Oberoi. Oberoi greetings.
Oberoi greetings.
Oberoi greetings.
- Oberoi greetings.
Mr. Dharam Oberoi.
Owner of Oberoi, Oberoi and
Oberoi group of Industries.
Oberoi greetings, Prem Oberoi.
Only two Oberois?
Where's the third one?
Oh, the lucky Oberoi?
He's far away, yet very close to us.
He loves us a lot.
He can face a lot of trouble...
...but can never see us in trouble.
But you shouldn't trust anyone
so much, especially nowadays.
Trust? We trust him.
You don't know him...
Mr. Paramveer Singh Dhillon.
My club's manager.
And he's a topper from the
university of Leicester.
He's very smart and intelligent.
You can ask him any
intelligent question.
Please go ahead.
Sir Yograj Khanna...
We are tired.
We would like to relax.
Thank you.
Okay. Okay. Okay.
- Please follow me.
Play it!
Are you sure you'll stay
at your friend's place?
I'm very much sure.
He'll feel bad if
we'll stay in a hotel.
And like you, he too
is Sage Nutty's devotee.
His house is small but
his heart is very big.
Such a great thought.
The car is here. I'll drop you there.
Mr. Khanna, I'd like to
talk to you for a minute.
Okay. Come on. - Mr. Khanna,
please let go of the bags.
I'll drop them.
I'll create a good
impression about you.
Very good.
Now my honor is in your hand.
I'm here to save your honor.
Shall we?
Dharam, what's the time in Banaras?
Four... No, five hours' difference.
Five hours!
Oberoi, Oberoi and Oberoi.
New life. New name.
We have lots of cases
pending under our old names.
Weren't you on a pilgrimage?
We are here for a pilgrimage.
Englishmen washed their sins
in our country for 200 years.
And we've come to take a
dip in the river Thames.
- A dip?
In Thames?
- Yes.
And Suman?
Suman... And he, they love each other.
- Love?
Yeah, love.
- With Prem Oberoi or Gajodhar?
True love doesn't ask for names, son.
What's in a name?
It's still me. What
difference does it make?
It makes a difference.
What do you think Sir Yograj Khanna...
...will let his
daughter marry this florist?
Why not? If their love is true.
There's something
called honesty as well.
What has honesty given you?
It's a pity that
between love and money...
...you guys have always chosen money.
One can buy everything with money.
Love, honor, everything.
Right, Dharam?
Only if he could understand!
The relationship you
guys are forming...
...for the greed of money,
will ruin many lives.
I won't let that happen.
Paramveer, we didn't come this
far to listen to your lecture.
We are here for the
biggest catch of our life.
Don't try to come in our way.
Fine, we'll see.
Yes, of course. You can see.
We, too, will see you!
Let's go, Dharam.
Oh damn!
Let's go.
But this was the address he gave me.
- Dharam, what are you doing?
Have you lost it?
Come on, Gajodhar. Come in.
Thank you. Thank you very much.
God bless you.
I'm feeling scared, Dharam.
Look at his size.
What if he raises his hand?
Don't worry. We'll handle it.
Look over there.
'Nutty, Looney, Crazy! '
Don't worry.
Sage Nutty is with us.
But where is his devotee Gyanprakash?
He must be close by. Where can he go?
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
So you guys are home.
Sorry, I couldn't
come out to receive you.
Last night Sage Nutty
appeared in my dream.
Hey, you've started
coming in dreams as well?
He told me...
I do. I do.
And yes, I guess you guys
have already met Einstein.
There's just a monkey over here.
Sorry, Einstein.
Remember, never call him a monkey.
Okay, we will never call him that.
His IQ is higher than that of humans.
Humans as a species have failed.
He has a big body and
he thinks big as well.
Einstein will take full care of you.
You'll just have to pay a
charge of 50 pounds per day.
Huh? Money?
He's charging us?
You guys must be wondering...
...how can Sage Nutty's
devotee charge any money.
I believe in the philosophy,
there's no such thing as free lunch.
Sholay's dialogue.
Hurry up, girls. There's
a lot of work pending.
Offerings. Show me your hand.
Oh, sorry. Sorry.
Any special reason?
I'd prayed in a Sikh temple
that I should find my true love.
And I found Prem.
And Param, where did she find Prem?
At Oberoi, Oberoi and Oberoi's.
I wish her the best.
Now I don't want anything else.
Even if Prem wasn't at Oberoi,
Oberoi and Oberoi's...
...then too I
would've married him only.
What if your father is against that?
Then we'd elope and get married.
How much do you love Prem?
A lot. You have no idea!
God, you know my
brother and dad very well.
Yet you made Suman fall
in love with my brother.
Why? Are you mad?
No way!
When you could not
change them then how will I?
No way! No way! No way!
You are...
He's asking for money.
Give him Rs. 50.
His IQ is more than us.
He wants pounds.
You want pounds?
Just a minute. Just a minute.
I'll give pounds.
He will give. He will give.
Pound. Pound. Pound.
Hey? What is this? You
are giving him alcohol?
Don't. What if he goes crazy?
Don't worry. Nothing
will happen to him.
Hey... Hey, no.
No, no.
- Drink it. Drink it. Drink it.
No, no.
Just go for it. Just go for it.
No. No Indian money.
Pound. Pound. Pound.
Hey, Dharam. What are you looking at?
36, 24, 36.
You will never change.
What will I gain by changing?
What's this?
He actually brought real money!
It's real.
She's the queen.
Keep her close to your heart.
Who all will I keep close to my heart?
I'll give it to you.
I'll give it to you. Drunkard No. 1.
Drink. Drink.
Oh, no.
Now you are behaving like humans.
I don't like the name Einstein.
His name should be Happy. Happy Singh.
We are friends forever.
I shall sacrifice my life...
But I shall never
sacrifice our friendship.
Dharam, in Banaras monkeys used
to stay on the roof of our house.
And here, this monkey and we
are staying under the same roof.
I wonder what else we'll
have to endure in this country?
Nothing will happen. Don't worry.
You'll get engaged tomorrow.
After that everything will be fine.
They are getting engaged,
play the music.
It's time to celebrate,
play the music.
The moon and stars dance...
When you dance, all
bachelors dance with you.
When you dance,
everyone dances with you.
When you dance, boys clap.
Be careful or someone
will have you kidnapped.
When you dance, boys clap.
Be careful or someone
will have you kidnapped.
Your beauty is like a rare diamond!
Your dress is red in color.
Your fancy extensions sting hard.
Making a thousand excuses.
This boy asks for your heart.
When I dance, boys clap.
When I sing, they rap.
My beauty is like a rare diamond!
My dress is red in color.
My fancy extensions sting hard.
Making a thousand excuses.
This boy asks for my heart.
Oh God, keep my
beloved away from all evil.
Keep our love away from all evil.
Oh God, keep my
beloved away from all evil.
Bangles dance around my wrist.
My beloved romances in rustic style.
The flowers on your tresses
made my heart skip a beat, my love.
You emit mesmerizing fragrance,
my love!
Your dress is red in color.
Your fancy extensions sting hard.
Making a thousand excuses.
This boy asks for your heart.
Your dress is red in color.
Your fancy extensions sting hard.
Making a thousand excuses.
This boy asks for your heart.
What happened?
No one would've done what you did.
I didn't do anything.
I just fulfilled the
promise I made to your parents.
May their soul rest in peace.
I did nothing.
Mr. Khanna...
- Suman isn't your daughter?
No. She's just like a daughter to me.
Just like a daughter?
Suman, you didn't tell them?
I tried telling him a number of times.
But he always stopped me saying...
I don't want to know
anything about your family.
I love you.
And with our love we
shall create a new world.
Thank you so much, uncle.
All this is the result
of your good upbringing.
You have given him such great values.
Yes, I've brought him up well.
Hey, Param, what happened?
What's so funny?
- Nothing, just...
I cannot believe that
even in this age and time...
...something like
true love really exists.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
- There you are.
Everyone should have
a father like you.
You've given such
great values to your son.
Am I right, Mr. Khanna?
- Yes, of course.
Have some sweets. Please.
- No, thank you.
No? And everyone
should have a son like you.
You are following
your father's footsteps.
You should have some
of this sweet for sure.
And you?
All this is thanks to Sage Nutty.
Nutty, Looney...
Mr. Khanna, you?
- Thank you. Thank you, my boy.
Hey, my sweetheart.
- Suman!
Where were you?
I'm sorry, I'm a little late.
Forget it.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I had to see off the guests.
Fine, I can forgive you for anything.
Hello, Prem.
- Hello.
You take good care of her.
Hello, uncle. Nice to meet you.
- Hi!
This is Reet, my daughter.
Your daughter?
- Yes.
- Of course.
The old child of Sir Yograj Khanna...
...and beloved wife Late Lady
Elizabeth Michelin Walter Khanna.
The great painter.
She seems to have
taken after her mother.
But unfortunately I'm not a painter.
I just work in an art gallery.
My daughter has just
returned from Paris.
Alright, Reet, now I want
you to meet Param, my boy.
Didn't I tell you about him?
Oh, so you are the one?
- Yeah. Good guy. - Hello.
Dad has praised you
a lot over the phone.
Thanks a million.
This sound?
It stopped.
- Yes, it did.
It stopped.
Move away, you rascal!
Let go of it!
Let go of it, Happy! Let go of it!
Happy, don't let go of the bag.
Don't let go of his bag.
You aren't my father.
You are my enemy.
Relax, my boy. Relax.
I'm the one who got
engaged to an orphan!
People break off marriages every...
Can't you break off an engagement?
Dharam, please come to the point,
don't confuse me.
No confusion.
If Prem Oberoi the heir of Oberoi,
Oberoi and Oberoi...
...stops loving Suman and
falls in love with Reet...
...then Khanna won't mind that.
Rather he'll be happy.
And anyway, one
cannot control his heart.
Dharam, I'm sure you have done
a course in being a scoundrel.
Hey, don't abuse talent
by calling it a course.
It's God's gift.
You, too, have a drink sometimes.
Alcohol doesn't suit me.
I get out of control
as soon as I drink it.
Then you should surely drink.
Is this club always this empty?
It needs a redesign.
- Yes.
Reet, too, was saying so.
Reet? She is right.
Then why didn't you?
I did.
I did. I always did things for others.
I always give to the
one who came to my door.
That's why today I
have a palatial house.
Luxury cars.
Business, exotic properties.
But all of these...
But all of these...
Are mortgaged.
I've a bank loan of 10 million
pounds which I have to repay.
Now all I have is this
club and a few shops outside.
That's it.
That's all I have.
Sir Yograj Khanna is finished.
I've not told Reet about it.
I've only told you.
Now that I've told you,
you too leave the job.
Just like the others.
You too leave.
Mr. Khanna, I'm with you.
Don't worry. Everything will be fine.
Sage Nutty said the same thing.
- Thank you.
God bless you.
Once Suman gets married...
...l'm thinking of
taking a loan from Oberoi.
I'll take a loan and pay off
all my creditors in the market.
What's 10-20 million pounds for him?
He gives 40-50 billion
pounds to poor countries.
He's very generous.
Large heart.
True, he's very generous.
Listen, I have some
reserve funds. Okay?
You discuss this with Reet.
Redesign this club. Okay?
And if you fall short
then pay from your pocket.
- We are family now.
Make an inventory for the rest
of the paintings. - Okay. Sure.
Hi, Reet.
- Oh. Hi, Prem.
One second, please.
And check with the curator as well.
- Yes, ma'am.
Okay. Thank you. That will be all.
Okay, ma'am.
Yes, Prem?
- Well, I was just passing by.
I just thought I
should drop in and say hi.
Prem, I wish you had called and come.
I've a very busy day today.
- No problem.
Actually, I wanted to buy a lot of
paintings for my New York office.
You know, since
childhood Prem has loved art.
That's nice.
So, why don't you look around then?
And I'll be right with you.
- Okay.
Wow! What a painting!
Brought a donkey back to life!
This isn't a donkey. This is a horse.
A horse?
You should avoid keeping
paintings of mundane painters.
You never come to
know what they paint.
This is a Hussain.
Hussain's famous horse painting.
The 'Wah Taj' guy?
Doesn't he play the Tambula?
I'm not talking about Zakir Hussain.
I'm talking about M. F. Hussain.
Of course. I was just joking.
- Okay.
Who is this M. F. Hussain?
Reet, this painting is amazing.
Just like you.
Thank you.
Actually, this is one of
my favorite paintings.
Yeah? - The style
reminds me of Leonardo's work.
I just love Leonardo!
I've seen Titanic 25 times.
What a love story!
I'm not talking
about Leonardo Di Caprio.
I'm talking about Leonardo Da Vinci.
The world famous painter.
I was just checking you out.
- What!
I mean your knowledge.
- Reet. - Hi, Paramveer.
You are bang on time for the meeting.
I'm used to making an
entrance at the right time.
Hello, Mr. Oberoi.
- Hello.
Shall we go now?
- Yes.
Prem, we have a meeting
scheduled with an architect...
...to discuss the club designs.
I've got to go now.
It was lovely discussing art with you.
Bye. Let's go.
My Gajodhar is here.
Did things go well with Reet?
Things are working out well.
What things are working out?
You are wasting a lot of time.
My style is different.
- What style do you have?
If I would've been in your place...
...then she would've
got pregnant by now.
You are just giving me a headache.
Hurry up, do something.
Learn something from him.
Hi, handsome.
- Hi.
Do it again.
Wanna dance?
Lovely hands.
- Have a look!
Reet's calling me.
She's just calling you,
it's not like she is here.
Hi, Prem.
- Hi, Reet.
You wanna come for a drive?
- Of course.
Okay, bye.
Yes, yes. Why not!
Of course.
Just wait.
- I love you. I love you.
I'll be waiting.
- I'll call you soon.
Oh, you are so sweet. Yeah. Yeah.
Really? Okay. See you soon.
Dharam, Reet wants to
go for a drive with me.
You stay here and kill
time with the monkey.
I'll make a move.
Hi, Reet.
- Hi.
You look great.
- Thank you.
And what about me?
I wish I could say the same about you.
Just joking!
Good. Good joke.
So, where are we going for a drive?
- Yes! My phone got conked off.
That's why I asked Reet to call you.
Hop in.
- Yes.
Reet, I'm thinking of
finding a nice boy for you.
Someone like him? No thanks.
Why? What's wrong with Prem?
- Yes?
He's too knowledgeable for me.
- Right, Prem?
I wonder what kind of
a boy you will find.
- Paramveer?
Hi, Param.
- Hi.
I've just mailed you some new designs.
I'm sure you'll like it.
Just check it.
Thank you so much. That's fantastic.
You're a sweetheart.
Hey, listen, do you
wanna come for a drive?
Isn't this knowledgeable boy
enough for you two beautiful girls?
Where are you?
- He's busy I think.
Me? I'm in the club.
I'll pick you up in 10 minutes.
- Okay.
I'll see you in the car park.
Reet. Drive.
Oh God!
Bunty Singh is here to
teach you a lesson! - Yes!
You guys are back to get thrashed?
How did he recognize us?
I don't know about you but I'm not
someone who can be easily forgotten.
He must've recognized you.
He doesn't recognize me.
Hey! Come here.
Param, wait.
Prem, you go ahead.
Today show them that you
are not just knowledgeable...
...but strong as well.
Yeah, Prem.
Go for it, Prem. You can do it.
My brother!
I've brought you here to
beat him and not hug him. - Yes.
You'll have to keep the
promise that you made.
Whether he's a Sikh or Kartar,
you'll have to beat him.
What will I face Dude?
I'll be done for.
And she'll be ruined.
- Yes.
You brought us here
to beat our brother?
- Brother never hurts anyone.
You lied to us? You...
Run! Run!
That was awesome.
Param, you are very famous.
You were just amazing today.
Prem, can you take a photo of us?
- Yeah.
My camera isn't working.
I've got a camera.
Here. Take.
My son...
Yes, Dharam. Tell me.
- Please come here.
Come here. Come here.
How was last night's drive with Reet?
It was amazing!
We had a candle-light dinner as well.
The one that involves a candle.
- Big one or a small one?
Size doesn't matter.
Oh really?
Then what happened?
- Then? We went to a discotheque.
You went to a disco as well.
Well done, son.
You went to a disco as well.
Then what happened?
Don't ask me to go on,
I'm feeling shy. - Oh.
I'm feeling ashamed,
you shameless being!
What is this? This!
I've clicked such nice pictures,
haven't I?
I was impressing Reet
with my photography.
Are you here to get married
or to create a wedding album?
Look, Dharam, don't go by the photo.
Paramveer was just
passing by that place.
And Suman too?
Gajodhar, you'll just keep watching...
...and Paramveer will take the girl
away from right under your eyes.
Am I not looking
handsome in those photos?
After all whose son am I?
What are you doing here?
I was just passing by and I thought...
...I should ask how you guys are doing.
You are so concerned about us.
Don't worry.
We are going to get
Khanna's all wealth.
Khanna, because of whose
money you guys have come here...
...that poor guy is in a lot of debt.
Heard him, Gajodhar.
Khanna is in a lot of debt.
You are in love with his daughter.
That's why he is in a lot of debt.
We won't be fooled by what you say.
Gajodhar, Suman loves you a lot.
Never betray her.
You'll never find a
girl better than her.
He will.
He'll get her at any cost.
And her name is Reet.
He can't have Reet even in his dreams.
He will get married to Suman.
And yes, even Sage Nutty
wouldn't be able to save you.
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
He is challenging us.
Don't worry.
Whether or not you get Reet,
...but your brother will
surely get her. - Paramveer?
Yokozuna speaking.
Yes, Bunty.
Yes, full team.
Okay. Love to Babli.
Mr. Oberoi, what important
thing did you want to discuss?
It's important as well
as not so important.
I feel like telling you
about it today. - Please.
Actually, I have two sons.
Prem has a twin.
- Twins?!
Yeah. Twins.
- How?
He just came to London.
I thought I should
introduce him to you.
Sure. Why didn't you tell
me about this any sooner?
Everything needs to be
done at the right time.
You are right.
Prem's twin will be
interesting like Prem.
They are coming together, right?
That's the problem, Mr. Paramveer.
- They hate each other.
They don't get along at all.
One doesn't stay where the other is.
Prem is a very good businessman...
...whereas he is a very good painter.
Oh. Painter!
Oh, he's a genius.
I'd love to meet him.
- Me too.
Mr. Hussain's mare.
Doesn't stop following me.
Gaja Gamini.
Doesn't it look as if
Prem has come here...
...wearing fake moustache and glasses?
Param, they are identical twins.
Then why did he need a moustache?
Param, now do you
understand Oberoi, Oberoi...
And Oberoi.
Son, what is your name?
- Why?
Because I want to know your name.
Because his name is Q.
P Q R S T...
- Q.
- Very unique name.
I didn't want anyone to
guess my caste, religion...
...or my country by my name.
Right. - I'm human and they
should consider me a human.
As soon as I saw you I understood...
...that you have genius
bacteria inside you.
Mr. Genius, how many minutes apart...
...were you and your brother born?
Two. Two minutes.
Oh. Two minutes.
He was born. I made
Maggi and Prem was born.
Grand entry.
Q, what type of a painter are you?
'Dabang' type.
'Dabang' type?
- Fearless.
The things renowned
painters fear painting...
Is what Q makes.
Oh really?
- Oh.
So, Q, what kind of
a brush do you use?
- Toothbrush?!
He uses toothbrush,
hairbrush, shoe brush...
He uses all types of brushes.
But he doesn't use painting brush.
That's why...
- That's why I wanted.
Yeah. - If you were so
wanted then where were you hiding?
It's no secret, I'm in
the clouds, the rain...
I'm in a scorpion.
I'm a soldier who is
close to everyone's heart.
You shouldn't fool
around like a stranger...
...you are a dear one and
dear ones are always very dear.
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!
Oh yeah. That too.
- Huh?
Q, I've always admired crazy painters.
What do you have to say about Dali?
- Dali, Dali...
Each branch, each leave,
each plant knows how I am.
You are so funny.
Mr. Q, I've got one more question.
Excuse me. Where's the washroom?
That way.
- Thank you.
Please take care of this.
- Please don't mind.
Even geniuses go to the toilet.
- Oh yeah.
Param, he's quite an interesting guy.
Yeah, very interesting.
Interesting family.
What mess have I got myself
into by becoming a painter?
Picasso. Van Gogh...
Dali was a painter?
Why did you!
- Prem?
Why are you roaming around
with a moustache and glasses?
Are you going for a
fancy dress competition?
No. - Take them off.
They don't look good on you.
No! No! No!
- Prem! Prem!
- Prem! Prem, listen!
No! No!
- Prem, listen to me!
- No! - Prem!
Prem! Prem!
Listen to me! Suman! Listen to me!
- Prem, what is this craziness?
Take them out! They
don't look good on you!
No! No! No!
- What is she doing? - Prem!
- What are you doing, Suman? - Prem!
Suman, he is not Prem.
- No!
Then who is he?
- He is Q.
He is Q?
- Yes. - His name is Q.
He's Prem's twin brother.
- I'm sorry Mr. Q.
But why such moustaches?
My Prem looks so
handsome without a moustache.
Suman, both my sons are very handsome.
He keeps a moustache
so that I too know...
...who is Q and who is not Q.
Hence I've been drawing a moustache...
...on my face since childhood.
And hence then I have gotten
into the habit of painting.
- That's why. - Funny.
Mr. Q, I'm sure your painting...
...will be just as
unique as your name. - Yeah.
Why not? - Yeah. - Yeah, I'd
love to see your paintings.
You would?
- Yes.
She would. She would...
She would!
Gajodhar, you have been
painting since 5 hours.
Will you take 5 days to make it?
I'm giving the final touches.
I'm giving the final touches.
Hey, where's my queen?
Why are you behaving like this?
Where's my queen?
Look at this!
My masterpiece.
- What a masterpiece.
Yeah! - What is this?
What is it! Stop clapping.
Stop it!
What have you made?
I'd got a ten on ten
for this in school.
Reet isn't in school.
She'll start running
as soon as she sees it.
I've heard that world's
every genius painter...
...drinks and makes a masterpiece.
Gajodhar, you too should drink today.
Drink as much as you want, my son.
Perhaps, you might
get a masterpiece idea.
Gajodhar, did you get any idea.
Everything is swimming.
- Swimming?
It's slowly swimming...
Oh God, this hangover!
Alcohol ruins the next morning.
- Yes?
Who... who has created this mess?
I don't know.
And... and that painting?
Did you make it?
How can I make such a bad painting?
Where is that scoundrel?
Where's Happy?
Look, Happy has become colorful.
Bloody drunkard.
He's become Technicolor.
He's behind all this.
Before anyone sees this
painting let's throw it out.
Otherwise, both of
us will get deported.
Just a minute.
Dharam, she is crying.
- The painting is such.
Mark! Spencer!
You are the next Picasso.
It's amazing. I love it.
You like it so much?
- Yes.
Consider it a gift from
me for your art gallery.
Thank you so much, Q.
Param, come here. I want
to show you something.
You okay?
- Yeah.
Take a look at Q's painting.
It touches the soul.
You can see that Q's
miraculous painting...
...is making the world shed tears.
How are you feeling?
This painting reflects
the metaphysical pain...
...of the inner turmoil of the painter.
No, no. I believe
this painting shows...
...the inherent desire of the
artist to be one with the universe.
- Q! Q! I love you!
He's a true artist in
the true sense of the word.
Every day whether or not...
It's not what you see that is art.
Art is the gap, you know what I mean?
I mean your paintings
are post colonial, post...
Shut up! Dude wants this painting.
Dude wants this painting. Mom!
How do you like the
world to remember you?
There was once a great painter.
What inspires you to do your painting?
Sorry. No more questions.
- Hey Q!
Come on, Prem!
Answer the goddamn phone!
Today, I'm ready to
face any mountains!
You called me, and here I am.
I would've killed you if
you wouldn't have come here.
You would've killed me?
You would've killed me?
Mr. Khanna, the nightclub is ready.
And this is the promotional plan.
Billboard, internet, TV
and everything. - No! No! No!
This is very expensive!
It's going to be very expensive.
I've taken care of it.
I've made the arrangements.
Param, just think...
- What?
A queue of youngsters
outside the nightclub.
A queue of oldies. A queue
of beautiful foreigners.
A queue of dark-skinned people.
A queue of fans. A queue of media.
Queues everywhere.
Historical queue.
- That's very good.
And what if all this happens for free?
But why will this happen for free?
We'll make Q the chief guest
for our nightclub's opening.
Q? - But why will Q do it?
Because he's just like family now.
You don't worry.
- That's my worry.
Param, my boy, it looks like Q
has been sent from top for us.
Who is that?!
Hey, Prem!
How come you are here?
- Prem!
Prem, are you alright?
- What happened, Suman?
Nothing, we were playing
the 'Ek Tha Tiger' game.
She means like in
the movie Tiger goes...
...to meet his beloved
by climbing a pipe...
I too did that.
But for this Tiger
this pipe is very weak.
Please change it and save the Tiger.
Anyway, there are hardly any
Tigers left in this world.
Good night.
Good night.
- Good night.
Param, he had handed me
a university's degree.
Don't worry, Mr. Khanna.
After marriage even the
best Tigers become pet cats.
You're right.
So, Mr. Khanna, what's the good news?
I've fixed the wedding date,
it's after 10 days.
My wedding?
Where's the bride?
You'll find a bride as well but
you'll have to contact my boy Param.
He can arrange anything for you.
We will find a bride for you later.
But for now, Mr. Khanna is
talking about Suman and Prem's wedding.
Here, have some sweets.
Aren't you happy?
I am happy. Why won't I be happy?
But what's the hurry?
It's your son who is in a hurry.
Am I right, Mr. Groom?
For how long will the poor guy play
'Ek Tha Tiger' late in the nights?
What was the need to play
'Ek Tha Tiger' with Suman?
I was tired of saying intelligent
things with that moustache on.
For some time I
wanted to be what I am.
People risk their life when they
are about to do something big.
And you are tired of
saying intelligent things!
Happy, reason it with him.
What's wrong with him?
- Happy?
Fly away, oh pigeon!
Fly away, oh pigeon!
Fly away, oh pigeon!
Now what is this?
- Suman has sent me a love letter.
Through this pigeon?
Just a minute.
Hey, stop your movie style drama.
Don't disturb me.
- Stop it!
You always keep bossing around me!
Why don't you do
something about that Paramveer...
...who is messing up everything?
Now, don't disturb me.
Hello. Hi. Bunty Hiroshima.
And Babli Nagasaki reporting, Dude-G.
What is the report?
Plan bombed.
What do you mean?
There were so many Sumos that
the plane couldn't take off.
- Yes.
- Yes.
- Yes.
But you don't worry, Dude-G.
They are coming in a big
Titanic like ship. - Yes.
- Yes.
The one that sank.
- Yes.
That means even this one will sink.
- Yes. No!
Do one thing.
Call Bruce Lee's grandson
Dead Lee in Mainland China...
- Yes.
Param, we did it.
The place looks absolutely amazing.
Thank you so much.
I couldn't have done it without you.
You're a sweetheart.
What was that?
Actually, I want to say something.
I, too, am in a mood to listen.
- Yeah?
Oh God.
- Just say it.
- Hi, uncle.
Don't worry about that. Just tell me.
What do you want to tell me?
- I...
Go on...
Reet, dear...
- Yes.
Come. Come here.
I'm sorry. I'll be right back.
Reet, darling, I feel like
drinking and dancing today.
Paramveer and you have
made such a colorful club.
And both of you look so dull.
You should celebrate it.
You should have drinks in your hand.
Enjoy with him. Cheers.
It goes in and true
feelings come out. - Sorry?
I was talking to my drink.
- Cheers.
One bottle of scotch, please.
Cheers. Cheers.
I don't drink.
- Drink it.
You'll easily be able to
say what's in your heart.
You are right.
Tell me.
I think I need one more.
Hey! Q has come! Everybody
get ready now! Everybody!
Reet! Q has come!
What are you doing here? Come on!
Let's go there! Come on! Everybody!
Everybody! Q has come!
Hurry up, babies. Come on.
Hey Q!
Be the water in my drink.
Be the story of my heart.
Be my queen.
Be mine! Be mine!
Be the water in my drink.
Be the story of my heart.
Be my queen.
Be mine! Be mine!
I have my own ways!
Being rustic in UK!
I make our own rules!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
Nutty Jat... Nutty Jat...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy Jat!
They cheat... They cheat...
They swindle the whole world!
Nutty Jat... Nutty Jat...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy Jat!
I look into their eyes
and steal their hearts!
Girls of UK are crazy about me!
- We are hot tempered.
This world...
- It's very confused.
- It's making news!
I have my own ways!
Being rustic in UK!
I make our own rules!
They cheat...
They cheat...
They swindle the whole world!
Nutty Jat... Nutty Jat...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy Jat!
They cheat... They cheat...
They swindle the whole world!
Nutty Jat... Nutty Jat...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy Jat!
The one who dances in the club.
She looks good in a club.
I'm crazy about her.
Someone call her here.
I'm drunk. Don't
make me drink anymore.
Her blue eyes, mesmerize me!
I want to dance with her!
Call that beautiful girl here!
I'm drunk. Don't
make me drink anymore.
On the table I keep
buckets of liquor.
At night I party with my friends.
Different, I am very.
Party, I'm its life.
Talent, I have unlimited.
I have my own ways!
Being rustic in UK!
I make our own rules!
They cheat...
They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
Nutty Jat... Nutty Jat...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy Jat!
They cheat... They bluff...
They swindle the whole world!
Nutty Jat... Nutty Jat...
Nutty, Looney, Crazy Jat!
She dances!
She dances!
She dances!
She dances!
Her blue eyes...
She dances!
I'm drunk!
She dances!
Gentle ladies and gentlemen.
When a Jat's full tight (drunk),
he's full right.
A huge round of
applause for our chief guest.
Q look a like...
Can you tell me, what is Q famous for?
Wrong answer.
Q look-alike 2...
Can you tell me why Q is famous?
Hint. Hint. Hint.
His moustache.
Stop it! Stop it! Stop it. Param!
What are you doing?
- Mr. Khanna, shall I tell you?
Shall I say everything about you...
- Quiet.
Go and have a seat.
- Paramveer!
Mr. Paramveer.
- Yes?
Why do you drink when you
cannot control yourself?
You should think about our honor.
Your honor?
Mr. Oberoi, Oberoi, Oberoi.
You have honor
factories all across the world.
There is no better
actor than you, dad!
And actor number two, my brother.
Where are you going?
Why was he addressing you
as dad and Q as his brother?
Why was he saying it?
Yes, after the
engagement didn't he say that...
...everyone should
have a brother like me.
And everyone should have
a brother like my son.
Now his gear is stuck
because he is drunk.
Where is your twin Prem?
Prem had an
important business meeting.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Meeting! In the middle of the night?
Have you guys ever thought...
...why don't we ever see
the two of them together?
They hate each other.
- Wrong.
They love each other.
They both love each
other so much that...
...if one is strangled then
it hurts the other as well.
Mr. Oberoi, find out whether
your other son's neck is hurting.
Hello, Prem? Where are you, son?
Param, stop it. He will get hurt.
He has seen it all.
A deal of Rs. 2 billion?
To hell with it. You
come here right away.
One hour? Okay, but come.
He is coming in one hour.
- One hour?
He will come in one second.
Have a look.
- No! No!
Moustache... Moustache...
- No! Paramveer, stop! Stop!
Come on!
Come on!
Move! Move!
Today is not opening of this club.
Today is shut down.
You guys are back to get thrashed?
He recognizes me even when drunk.
He looks more deadly when drunk.
Don't mess with Bunty Chong.
Bunty Chong, Ping Pong.
Hey, I'll ding dong you. Come here.
Anybody who values his life... Run!
Let's go. Come on! Come on!
Let's go, Suman.
Babli? Do you value your life?
Prem! Good that you are here!
Come on, thrash them!
How can someone whose
name is Prem, fight?
He can only love.
Come on, let's go and love each other.
It's the opening of the
club or breaking of the club?
He is saving the club.
Very violent man.
- No, no he is fine. He is fine.
Oh no!
This bloody F1!
Hi! Hello?
Param, how are you feeling?
My head is blasting.
Do you have any idea of
what you did last night?
Did... did I make a big mistake?
Yes, you did.
- I did?
Yesterday, you were trying
to say something to me...
I... l...
You didn't complete it.
Do you remember?
- Oh God.
I'm coming over.
And you can complete
whatever you wanted to say.
Oh shit!
A girl?
My bed?!
Shit! Drinks!
Excuse me...
Get up!
Oh shit! Reet!
Please! This is all your fault.
- You are still not ready?
Get ready fast!
There's a coffee shop downstairs.
Why don't you go and wait over there?
We'll talk there.
I'll get ready and come.
Reet! Where are you going?
I need to go to the washroom.
But... but...
It's a gents' toilet.
- What?
- What bullshit.
- I think you are still drunk.
No! No! No! Reet!
But! But! But! Listen...
Reet, let's get out of this place.
First tell me, what were you
trying to tell me last night?
Last night...
We'll talk in the coffee shop.
Why? This place is perfect.
You see, but...
Let's just get out of this place.
You can write but you cannot say it?
Oh God!
Feeling shy?
- Yes.
Okay, I'll say it.
Oh sorry.
Yeah? You were saying something.
Who the hell is she?
Who are you?
- That's what I want to know.
I really don't know.
- So what is she doing here?
I don't know.
You carry on.
Have fun.
Reet, forget about it.
Thank you.
- It's alright.
Good that you came to
know what he really is!
I just never expected
this from Paramveer.
He was always so dignified...
Caring, mature...
He was just perfect.
Doc, after getting
drunk for how many hours...
...does a person stay knocked out?
5-6 hours.
- It's already passed that.
12 hours?
- Passed that too.
24 hours too sometimes.
- 24 hours!
- Oh God!
Are you alright?
- Yeah, yeah. I'm alright. I'm fine.
My 1000 pounds, honey.
Who... who are you?
I'm Lewinsky.
And you better pay my bill.
What bill?
For the fun we had last night.
Fun? What fun?
This couch. That bed. That fun...
- Hold... hold it!
You are joking. It's not true.
It's not true.
Check your IPad.
I'll do that.
I'm sure somebody's
playing a prank on me.
Oh God!
Oh God!
Oh God!
Just... just...
Do you remember that?
Oh, that was so much fun!
1000 pounds please.
Oh God!
Here, take all the money.
But please... please don't tell anyone.
Why are you so sad?
Cheer up.
Honestly, you are really-really good.
Next time, I'll pay.
Oh God!
Yes, Mr. Khanna?
Hey, Param, my boy, today Q's
painting is going to get auctioned.
You have to come with me.
- I'll be there.
8 million. 8 million in the house.
- Thank you very much, sir.
Remember ladies and gentlemen.
This is for charity.
8 million pounds only. Do I hear 9?
Is there 9 anywhere in the room?
This is nothing. 9 million?
Yes. Yes. Is that a bid,
sir? Thank you very much, sir.
Marvelous. Thank you very much.
But 9 million pounds is...
Why did you have to
give it for charity?
What did I know that the
monkey's painting will shake the world?
Do I hear 10? There's 10.
Thank you very much, madam.
10 million pounds,
very generous of you.
Thank you very much.
110 lakhs pounds.
Sorry, sir? I didn't
quite catch that, sir.
What was that?
11 million pounds.
- Hot!
11 million to you, sir.
- Hot!
Move away.
Sir! Excuse me!
- He hits hard!
It is with you. It's 11 million!
Do I see 13?
13 million? We can
go higher than that.
14. 14.
I've got to see 14. This
painting is not worth less than that.
I can assure you. Is
there 14 million pounds?
Let's have a lot more. Is there 15?
It gotta go for 15. More! More!
And I have a bid of 15 million!
15! - That is chicken feet
for this fabulous, fabulous...
How much is 15 million in rupees?
I'm not that good in Mathematics.
Thank you very much
- But you know what charity is.
15 million, once.
15 million, twice.
For the third and final time...
Mr. Generous, Q.
My Q, who gives a
charity of 15 million.
Now your wedding procession
will leave from Buckingham Palace.
Buckingham Palace?
Is it a general store?
You can consider it that.
We will take Khanna's money for sure.
- Yes.
You leave the rest to me.
Hey, you won't get
me killed, will you?
Why are you talking about death?
Don't be sad. Be happy.
Happy. We have Happy with us.
Got it, stupid?
- Yes.
My great painter.
You need to make
another painting, darling.
Damn you...
Happy. Happy, please.
You are right, Happy.
He is wrong.
He didn't take your name in any
publicity stint or any interview.
- Why didn't you?
Go and apologize.
Say sorry to Happy.
- Come on.
Happy, my buddy.
Sorry, my buddy. Forgive me.
Dharam, he won't agree.
He will agree. He will agree for sure.
Formula 44.
Why are you stopping me now?
Now I need it.
I'm. I... I...
Why didn't You stop me back then?
Hey, what am I doing!
Why didn't you stop me back then?
You knew, right?
Dharam, your Formula
44 won't fail, right?
Never. Never.
- Never?
It's a 101% tried formula.
Kings lost their kingdoms.
Sages and saints strayed.
No one can resist it, my child.
No one.
So what is Happy Singh made of?
You just wait and watch!
Just wait and watch. Here...
I know you want it.
- But you're never gonna get it.
You'll never be able to
lay your hands on me.
Whether anyone
agrees with it or not...
But this world is crazy about me!
I know you want it.
But you're never gonna get it.
You'll never be able to
lay your hands on me.
Whether anyone
agrees with it or not...
But this world is crazy about me!
I sometimes feel like
taking myself into my arms.
What do I need anyone else for?
I'll love myself.
Do one thing.
- Yes?
Close your eyes. And go to sleep.
I should go to sleep?
- Go to sleep. Go to sleep.
I too will go to sleep.
Ain't nobody got a body like.
- Sheila!
Everybody wants the body of...
- Sheila!
Drive you crazy 'cause my name is...
- Sheila!
Are just...
A family always supports each other.
A family always supports
each other. - Not fair, God!
Look at your Formula 44.
He didn't make a painting.
He is taking
advantage of our goodness.
Hey, are you trying to be King Kong?
Why didn't you make the painting?
What's wrong with him?
- You drank all our liquor last night.
Who will make the painting?
He drank all the liquor and
had fun with Sheila as well.
You had loads of fun.
Who will make the painting?
Your father?
Hey! You don't know who we are!
Seems like Paramveer's
ghost has possessed him.
I want Q.
Because now Q will just
make one painting in his life.
Did you ask me whose?
- Yes.
Did you really ask me whose?
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Slap yourself.
- What?
Yeah. Yeah. Slap.
Slap. Come on. Come on.
Harder. Harder. Harder.
Mine. Dude's. Who else's?
And then Dude's that painting
will be this world's 9th wonder.
- Wow!
But where can we find Q?
I see him with the Khanna family.
- Yes.
- Yes. - Yes.
That means Q will get me both,
the 8th and the 9th wonder.
And then Dude will be the
only earthling with two wonders.
I like it. I like it.
Kidnap Q.
- Yes.
What about Super Sikh?
Super Sikh?
No problem.
The one who cannot be
defeated with strength...
...can be defeated with emotions.
Kidnap his family.
Because family always come first.
Others are just like dreams.
- Oh.
Have you heard this dialogue?
- No, no.
I wrote it. Dude is a poet also.
He makes them so instantaneously.
Long live Dude-G!
- Dude-G!
Have a seat.
Have some sweets.
Have some sweets.
- What's the good news?
We've fixed Reet's marriage with Q.
She agreed?
- She will.
Your manager is very happy.
Actually, I want to double yourjoy.
How? - How about if your two
daughters and his two sons...
...get married on the same day?
Wow! Great idea!
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah
- Sir Yograj Khanna...
You very well know
that it's impossible.
Why? - Because
unfortunately my sons hate each other.
You'll never get a
better opportunity...
...to change hatred into love.
Just imagine.
What a photo frame it will be!
Oberoi, Oberoi and Oberoi.
Suman, my child...
- Hi, uncle.
Have a seat.
- What are you doing here?
Something untoward has happened.
I cannot say it.
But if I don't then it
will be unjust to you.
What happened, uncle?
Dear, Prem and you cannot get married.
We cannot get married?
Because Prem... cannot wear Raymunda.
Is that all?
If he doesn't want to wear this suit...
...then I'll talk to my tailor Reid
and get another suit made for him.
Even Reid and Taylor
cannot do anything, dear.
Raymunda means, a complete man.
And Prem...
I cannot say it.
This is his medical report. Read it.
Prem isn't a complete man.
I'm so sad, dear.
That he cannot take my name forward.
Leave him.
Suman, how come you are here?
What happened?
Am I so bad?
Why didn't you tell me
that you cannot wear Raymunda?
I cannot wear Raymunda?
- You can't.
Why can't I wear Raymunda?
You cannot.
- Why can't I?
You cannot. Your dad
has told me everything.
I cannot wear Raymunda?
You cannot.
I'm not getting it.
Prem, in the beginning it is a
little difficult to face such a thing.
But don't worry.
We will together
face this harsh world.
To hell with Raymunda.
- To hell with Raymunda?
Suman, why are you ruining your life?
It is very important to wear Raymunda.
Why are you guys
talking about Raymunda? Yes?
I know that...
That you are... Impotent.
Yes, I'm important.
Not important. You are impotent.
I'm impotent?
- Yes.
I am?
Yes, you are.
I am impotent.
- Good.
You'll be able to face the
truth you keep saying that.
So what if we cannot have kids?
We'll... We'll adopt.
Dad, we'll adopt.
How can you adopt them!
I... think it will be better...
...if we should tell her
about your horoscope as well.
Yes, we should.
I can't find enough
courage to say this.
The priest we showed
Prem's horoscope...
...said that the girl he marries...
...will die 7 months
after their marriage...
Now I...
The 7 months I'll spend with you...
...will be better than 7
lifetimes without you.
I love you.
To you...
I dedicate...
My life, my love.
My life, my love.
What are you thinking about, Gajodhar?
I heard the To you.
You heard my name?
Not your name, the To you song.
I'm in love with Suman.
How many times have I
told you to have fun...
...but never fall in love.
What you told was wrong.
Dharam, we are thugs.
Our specialty is that
whenever we fool anyone...
...they at that moment, unknowingly...
...happily give us all their money.
But today...
Today, for the first time we have
formed a relationship with someone.
And we are playing with their lives.
- Why?
Because we are scared
of facing the truth.
What truth?
That Paramveer is
right and we are wrong.
We are wrong, Dharam.
We cannot buy love
and respect with money.
Paramveer and Reet...
...love each other.
We shouldn't come in between them.
We'll lose even if we win, Dharam.
I've decided. I'll
tell the truth to Suman.
I'll take care of whatever happens.
You've been hijacked.
He means you have been kidnapped.
But who are you?
He is Joe Armstrong.
He is going to make the
8th wonder of the world.
You didn't even know that?
He himself looks like a wonder to me.
I like that. I like that!
You liked it? - Yeah.
You liked it? We all liked it.
The Dude is dangerous.
Now whenever I fire a bullet,
someone will die.
Even if it's one of our men.
Now tell me, where is Q, the
one who made the world cry?
Come on.
Dude-G, I can tell
you where he can be.
Look, this is 'P'.
- And this is 'R'.
And Q should be between it?
- Yes.
Correct. Should be.
Should be.
But Q is not there.
That's exactly what I am asking.
Where is Q?
You don't know? You don't know?
Dude wants Khanna and
his family now, please.
Get them. Get them. Get them.
Mr. Armstrong, I'm
ready to give you the land.
But please, let go of the Oberois.
Oberoi greetings.
Good. Arrangements have
been made for the 8th wonder.
Dude is happy. Clap. Clap. Clap.
But Q will make the 9th wonder.
So, where is Q? Once again.
Q is out of our lives, Mr. Blonde.
Hold on, Dude is extremely angry.
Bring in the cars.
Stop. Q is here.
- What?
Please forgive me if you can.
Here you go.
Q has come.
- Oh no!
Then where is Prem?
You really think Dude is a fool, huh?
Quickly tell me where your brother is.
Dude, I'm my brother.
He's said something which
has a very deep meaning.
We'll have to call a psychiatrist!
What! Dude! Dude!
- Shut up, both of you, please!
Dude! Dude!
We've had enough ofjokes.
Now a lot of people will have to die.
Never make such a mistake.
Because if my brother comes here
then you'll be in big trouble.
Now which brother
are you talking about?
You just said that
you are your brother.
My real brother.
Who is he?
Paramveer is your brother?
We've made a whole
movie on this relationship.
Now how do I explain it to you?
Dude-G! He is that Super Sikh!
He will dig our graves!
Super Sikh?
What are you waiting for?
Kill him.
Dude is...
Dude is impressed.
Dude liked what you did.
Very impressive.
What you did so far
just created a storm.
Now Dude will bring an earthquake!
You wanna watch! You want to watch!
Okay! Bring in the earthquake!
Come on! Come on!
Oh no!
No! No!
Yes! Yes!
Sir Yograj Khanna.
You were going to thug us.
You are a scoundrel.
Come on.
Come on.
Dude is dead.
Reet, are you alright?
- Yes, I'm fine.
Uncle, what about you?
All your problems will be
solved after selling this painting.
But one problem still remains.
Say it at least now!
This sound!
It's my heart saying, I love you.
They are settled for life.
Come on, let's play 'Ek Tha Tiger'.
- Yes.
Prem! I've changed that pipe.
It's of no use now.
Our setting?
Paining. Money. Buckingham Palace.
Kohinoor. Okay?
Nutty, Looney, Crazy!