The Secret Life of the American Teenager s05e19 Episode Script
Interference
AMY: Previously on The Secret Life of the American Teenager - Are you really going to go here? - That depends.
On whether or not I go here? That might have something to do with it.
There was a $2,000 application fee.
- It's non-refundable.
- Non-refundable? I recognize you from the newspapers.
Johnny D.
I'm going to lose $2,000 if I decide not to go to the school.
Well, you wanted to be sure you got in, and, well, you got in.
Ricky would never be comfortable with my coming to school here if you're here.
If you were really in love with Ricky and you cared what he thought, you wouldn't even consider leaving him to come to school here.
This lawyer came to see me today and he said I could sue the school and make millions of dollars and they wouldn't have to pay it, it would be their insurance company.
What? - Omar is leaving me! - What? This company he works for wants him in New York.
How could you think this is about money? I want to feel satisfied that I have made every effort to make this relationship work out.
Well, that's pretty much what someone says when they want out of a relationship without any guilt.
I knew it was about money.
You tricked me.
Yeah, I did.
And you fell for it.
Does your wife want anything else? Shh.
No, no.
We're fine.
(SIGHS) I have to go, I have to get him to bed.
You going to tell me what you came over here for or not? I know you came over here for something other than a free meal.
All right, I just I feel funny talking in front of him.
He's asleep.
And he's three.
He won't remember.
Go ahead.
I know Amy wants to go to school in New York, and I don't think she wants to get married before she goes.
I'm trying, I'm really trying to give her what she wants, to make going to school in New York possible.
But I don't really know exactly how I'm going to do that.
That's because there's no way to do that.
There's no way she can go to school in New York and be married to you and be a responsible wife and mother.
I know it's tough being a teenage mom, but Amy's had a lot of support, a lot of financial support.
What, you supposed to pay for everything for the next four years? I'd like to, but we need some help paying for wherever Amy wants to live in New York.
You shut that down right now.
All right? She does not need to get whatever she wants, it's not good for her, really, shut that down.
She should be thinking about her son and about you, frankly.
You've been good to Amy.
Well, except for getting her pregnant.
But for the last few years anyway.
You two should get married this summer like you said you would, and she should stay in California to go to school.
I don't think she's going to get married to me this summer or stay here to go to school.
She wants what she wants.
No.
You have to make her stay here and get married and go to school.
I don't want to make her.
I want her to want to stay here, - and I want her to want to get married, but - But what? But she doesn't want to do that so I want her to have what she wants because I did get her pregnant.
Oh.
Guilt.
I see.
You planning to pay for that little slip-up the rest of your life? Uh, yeah.
Because I want John around for the rest of my life and it's the responsible thing to do.
How the hell are you going to live in two different cities and be parents to a three-year-old? If you were willing to help Amy out with the housing in New York.
No.
I am not willing.
And I can't.
And I bought this place so I would not be able to help anyone out because I don't want to help anyone out, I want to tie up all my money in something that I want.
I earned it and I'm going to spend it, and I'm not going to spend it on Anne, or Amy, or Ashley, I'm going to spend it on me.
I did already.
You know what, I'll talk to Amy, I'll be the bad guy.
Oh, no, no, no.
No.
I don't want you to do that.
You came to me for help, that's the help I can give you.
That's okay.
I was just exploring some options, trying to figure out a plan.
It's not possible! Do not dream this dream with Amy! Could you please put the chair backs up, we should be landing shortly.
Ew! Get off me! Sorry.
You were on me first.
So you were intentionally on me? Geez, Ben.
Give it up.
It was nice while it lasted.
(GROANING) * Falling in love is such an easy thing to do * Birds can do it * We can do it * Let's stop talking * Let's get to it * Let's fall in love I got it.
I don't know what "it" is, but it's awfully early for you to be up and getting anything.
You got what? I got a good twenty-four signatures, so far.
Is this something political? No, it's not, it reaches across all politics, all socio-economic groups, all religions and faiths and philosophies.
Or maybe not, but it's big.
Out of all people surveyed, adult people, not one has ever used algebra in their daily life or even at work.
I wish I had this coffee before you came in.
Have you ever used algebra in your work or in your life? - No.
- Twenty-five.
And the day isn't over.
Aren't you supposed to be going over to Kathy's to study for the mid-term today? Yeah, but what's the point? I'm never gonna use algebra.
I'm afraid you are.
You're going to be taking a second year of algebra in your junior year.
I'm afraid I'm not.
Because if I keep going with this, no one's going to be taking algebra.
I'm going to change things around here.
Around where? Around school, the entire school system.
I'm gonna get algebra removed from the school curriculum.
Well, unless you're going to make that to happen by Monday, I suggest you get on over to Kathy's and get some help with that midterm.
What's the worst that can happen if I just fail algebra? I mean, I should fail, otherwise there's no point to my efforts to get algebra removed from schools.
Ethan, I I agree with you in that requiring all students to take algebra could possibly keep a student who's bad at algebra from succeeding in school overall.
And even though algebra is used by accountants, financial planners, engineers, physicists, and a lot of occupations, not everyone does get algebra and not everyone uses it in their adult life.
But some people do.
I haven't found one.
Good morning.
Well, good morning.
What's all this? I thought you might like breakfast in bed.
I should be making you breakfast in bed.
So, is this what you call being your own person? Waiting on me? Yes.
I wanted to make you breakfast and I did.
But you're making me breakfast because you don't want to go to New York.
Not true.
I wanna go, just maybe not this year.
It's something we have to figure out.
I like that.
I like that it's something "we" have to figure out, sounds like two mature adults in a healthy relationship.
Omar, I'm really proud of you, but I want you to be proud of me too.
And if I'm just your live-in girlfriend trying to get into college while you have this big important job, then I don't think you're going to be so proud of me and I'm certainly not going to be proud of me.
Look, I need to finish all my core classes and it doesn't cost anything for me to live here, I don't know, maybe you could work it out with your company so you can work from here the first year.
The first teachers we're working with are in New York, if I'm going to be involved in this project from the ground up, I have to be there.
Okay.
But not every day, not every weekend, not all the time.
Why don't you find a couple of schools that look good to you in New York, and let's see whether or not your credits would transfer and how long it'll take you to get in.
And you're not my girlfriend, you're my fiancée.
We're getting married.
Maybe you could even get into a college in New York for next fall, and in that case, I guess you should continue classes here, but we don't know, maybe you can get in.
Let's get all the information before we make any decisions.
- That sounds totally reasonable to me.
- Good.
So you made me breakfast, why don't we take a drive to the beach later and I'll buy you lunch? Mmm.
Sorry.
I told Grace I'd have lunch with her.
- You're having lunch with Grace? - Mmm-hmm.
Enjoy.
I just want some options, that's all.
And I'll probably go to school right here next fall, but I don't have any acceptance letters yet, but I do have options.
And it's April, I have a month or two to decide.
Plus the school we went to visit in Utah, it was amazing.
And it's really only like four or five hours away if you drive? Yeah.
I guess.
But four or five hours is four or five hours.
You want to be four or five hours from me? I don't want to be, but I can't like move the school here.
Well, I'm already so far behind, I could just transfer and go with you.
Um, I'm sure you could but I think we should wait to see how it goes when you get your cast off.
You're probably going to be playing football again next fall.
Yeah, but it wouldn't mean anything if you weren't here to watch.
That's sweet.
I saw this class, it's for young couples who want to get married, who aren't engaged yet.
It's a thing on campus.
You want to take that class with me, as kind of a first step? Well, I just I feel like I'm just finishing high school and I have all these decisions to make about college.
Maybe it's just not the right time.
It's spring, this is when people are in love.
I think the class is just starting up.
Really? Huh.
How long is the class? It's a couple of hours, once a week for four weeks.
Huh.
Well.
Let me think about it.
It's through the campus ministry.
Okay! I'll think about it.
Amy! Someone is waiting to say good morning.
Hey.
Hey, buddy.
Hi.
Wanna get in bed with Mommy? No, he doesn't.
He wants Mommy to get out of bed.
It's 9:00.
- Is it? - Yeah.
I was so tired.
Yeah, nothing I can do about that.
Now I have to go to work.
Are you going to drop John off? - Drop him off where? It's Saturday.
- Oh, right.
I forgot.
Really, if you're going to get a shower before I leave, you have to get up, I need to get downstairs.
I showered when I got in.
Did John have breakfast? - At 6:00.
- Oh.
Amy? Don't you want to get up? Yes.
Yes, Ricky.
All right, I'll get up.
I'm getting up.
- You want some breakfast? - No, I'm fine, you can go.
I know I can go, I just thought I'd make you breakfast, hear about your trip.
I'll tell you when you get home from work, there's not that much to tell.
- Really? - Really.
Did you have a good time? Wasn't really there to have a good time, I was there to check out the school and we'll talk later.
Where'd you lose my mother's wedding band? - What? - I notice you're not wearing your wedding band or your engagement ring.
I must have taken them off and put them in my purse.
Yeah.
You must have.
At a party? Didn't want anyone to know you're married? Well, I'm not married, but no.
I think maybe I Yes, yes, I took them off when I was going through security at the airport.
Because I didn't want to set off any alarms or anything.
So, they have to be in my purse.
I'll find them, you go to work.
You better.
It's my mother's wedding band.
It means a lot to her even if it means nothing to you and she gave it to you as a wedding gift.
We're not even married and I don't think we're going to be getting married, and we have to give the rings back if we're not getting married.
Yeah, of course.
Of course, we're not getting married or, of course, we're giving the rings back? Ugh, what happened to, "Welcome home, it's so good to see you?" It was good to see you until I noticed you weren't wearing your rings.
- We have to talk.
- I said that.
Hey! What did you bring me? Bring you? What did I bring you? - From? - New York? Anything you can get in New York, you can get here.
You can't get a "I heart New York" T-shirt here.
Did you want an "I heart New York" T-shirt? I can order one over the internet for you, but later, I gotta go to work.
That's not the same, ordering over the internet.
So, how was it? Was it fun? - What'd you do? - I had some fun.
Last night, coming back, Amy fell asleep on me and I pretended to be married to her.
And she didn't know you were pretending to be married? No.
- So how was the marriage? - Short.
That was the highlight of your trip to New York? No.
Don't tell my dad, but I found an apartment.
If I could get that apartment, I would definitely go to Hudson University.
Why don't you get a dorm room and be like a normal person for a change? I'm getting a dorm room too, but I want the apartment.
Dorms are too loud.
You can't really sleep in them and you can't study, but they're great for social purposes.
And I have to go to work now, like a normal person, so you have to go.
You didn't meet any girls there? I met a few.
I even had a date.
- Kind of.
- No details, please.
You know, maybe you should go out some time.
Have you met somebody that you would go out with? Maybe you could call them and that would give you another reason to get out of my room other than I have to go to work.
What? Have you? No.
No, I haven't met a single guy who wouldn't think that dating an ex-hooker was all about getting her to have free sex.
I forgot.
Sorry.
Nice you can forget, I can't forget.
And, just for the record, I was forced into doing what I did! I know, I know, I said I was sorry.
I'm never going to have a normal life, you know, because anyone I would ever be interested in would never be interested in me because I am an ex-hooker! My face was on the cover of a newspaper! Anyone can go on the internet and see this and read "hooker.
" I hate that word.
I hate it! Like I could ever get a date! I hate you! Guess I should have gotten her the T-shirt.
I'm on my way to work.
I forgot about her history, I just asked if she'd found somebody to date.
I I'll Geez.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'll fix it, I will.
You will.
Hey! What's going on? Uh, Lauren, what's going on? I don't know, what's going on with you, Madison? We're babysitting.
Amy or John? - John.
- And where's Amy? I guess that's up to you and Amy.
Yeah.
We don't know where she is or where she's going or anything.
(SIGHING) Well, look who's here.
Hello, Benjamin.
Good to see you again.
Good to be here.
So what do you need me to do? There's a bunch of boxes and packing in the freezer that need to be removed.
Why is he telling me and you're not telling me? Because he's taking over on Saturdays while I take off.
- For how long? - For as long as I want.
So, uh, now you're my boss? I'm in charge of getting things done on Saturday and that's what needs to get done this Saturday.
We had two large deliveries yesterday.
- Thanks.
- Oh, no.
No, thank you.
I won't be spending my day in the freezer.
Until you learn how to run the cash register, package the meat or something about cooking, there's really not a lot else you can do.
- It's a fine line.
- I know that.
Just keep it business, I don't want any trouble, but I would love Saturdays off.
And I would love the extra pay.
I don't know what I could have done with them.
I swear I never take them off, I'm so afraid of losing them.
They had to have fallen off somewhere.
Like at a party or something? No.
Are you sure? Yeah, I'm sure.
I wasn't at any parties.
I wanted to go to some parties, but I didn't because I didn't want Ricky to get upset and have any reason to tell me not to go to school there.
Hey, bud! Hi.
What is that? I found it.
Thank you.
Ew.
It's disgusting.
It's an old band aid.
Okay.
But, Amy, don't you see that Ricky already has a reason to tell you not to go to school in New York? Yeah, what would you do with John? Well, either I'll take him with me or else he'll stay here with Ricky.
I'll get an apartment close to school and I'll put John in day care and I'll go to school.
That's going to be really hard.
Yeah, and really expensive.
I mean, who's going to pay for that? I have a scholarship.
That covers an apartment and day care? How much money does Ricky make working in that butcher shop? Not enough.
So if you could take care of John, then I'll go talk to my dad and see if he'd be willing to help me out.
Us out.
Us.
Are you still getting married? You guys, we're, like, already living together, we're engaged, we have a kid, practically married already.
I don't see what the big deal is.
All right, I'll be back.
I'll just going to go say bye to John.
She's lost her mind.
She's not gonna marry Ricky.
I can't believe it! It's what she always wanted.
I know! And it's like she had a baby, but she doesn't know what a baby is.
Don't worry about a thing.
- Yeah, we'll be fine.
- Yeah, we're fine.
And, uh, where did you tell Ricky that you're going? Just so we know.
I just want to talk to my Dad.
Amy, you were gone a couple of days, you don't see your dad every day when you're here.
- I know that.
- You can't take John with you? We need babysitters? It's just for an hour or two.
Are you going over to ask for a loan? I've already asked for a loan for you.
He said no.
Well, you're not his daughter.
Oh.
Hi.
Look, about last night Do you mind? We're having a personal conversation here.
No we're not, we're working here.
What about last night? I'm sorry, I'm carrying heavy boxes here.
We're going to be having a lot more deliveries, because we're the local supplier for Geoff's now.
Just so you know.
I got George to switch over to us.
So I'll be doing a lot more of this.
Probably.
But I'll be doing a lot more of that too.
And you'll be doing a whole lot more of this after I go off to school.
Yeah.
Unless I hire someone else or Bunny hires someone else.
Are you going off to school? Yes.
I am.
And, look, I'm going to be getting an apartment.
If Amy, or you and Amy and John, would care to share it with me I mean, help you out with your expenses.
Just something to think about, boss.
Ok, so, I just need about, $18,000 plus the deposit.
Amy, what's 1500 times 12? Oh, right.
Eighteen thousand.
I just need $18,000 plus the deposit.
Just think of it as a student loan.
The Bank of Dad folded.
There are no more loans.
You're over 18.
You have your own family.
You have your own finances.
Welcome to the world of adults.
Where, by the way, people take care of their own children.
- Uh, you're not taking care of me.
- Oh, but I am.
The whole goal of any parent is to make sure the child is self-sufficient.
Let's see what you can do without my help.
Go get 'em, tiger.
Dad, I will be self-sufficient, once I get out of college, but right now I need a loan.
So you can go to New York to go to college, away from your husband and son.
I don't know if I'm taking John with me yet or not, I mean, maybe I will.
If I can also come up with the money for a day care.
- You're not going anywhere.
- I am, I'm going somewhere.
And if you don't want to help me then fine.
I don't want to help you.
You know why? You have no business going to New York.
You should stay right here, and get married, and raise your son with your husband and go to college.
You get a free apartment and free day care.
Who gets a free apartment and free day care? I work at that day care.
And I'm sick of working at that day care.
Listen to what I'm saying here, Amy, I've always given you good advice, remember all the things I've been right about in the past? Eat your vegetables, brush your teeth, and don't have sex until you're married.
I took your advice on two out of the three.
Dad, come on.
No, you're talking about twenty grand, I just bought a restaurant.
I don't have twenty grand.
And if I did, I wouldn't give it to you because it's the wrong thing to do.
All right.
Well, fine.
I just had to ask.
So now you're going to go ask your mother? Or Nora or Margaret.
Because they'll understand education is important to a woman.
So is money.
See if any of those broads give you twenty grand.
- Yeah, I will.
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR) Hi.
Who are you? What do you want? Aren't you the church organist? Kathy, Ethan.
Is everything okay? Yeah, we're taking a survey.
Hi.
I'm Kathy.
Oh yeah, the one who didn't listen to her father either, how you doing? Well.
Thank you.
We just wanted to get your signature on something.
No politics.
Interferes with business, I don't want any calls or emails.
What survey? Is this something for school? Yeah.
Have you ever used algebra in your adult life? No.
And don't ask her, she's not an adult.
No one has.
That's why I feel it shouldn't be taught in school, or it should be an elective.
Is this to avoid a test? Yes.
A midterm.
He's avoiding, not me.
Let me tell you something, all of you.
Sometimes you got to do things you don't want to do.
And if you don't get anything else out of taking algebra, you should get that.
You got it? Get out of here.
Oh, nice.
You are not going to New York.
The whole thing is ridiculous.
Dad, if I don't go now, I may never have this chance again.
Amy, that's what being a parent is all about.
Missing opportunities in life.
Never doing what you really want to do.
Never being all you could have been.
It's about settling.
Settle.
I don't care if you love Ricky or not.
He's John's father, he's good to you, he's good to your son, he's a hard worker, and he's come back from the depths of hell to be a decent human being.
So you get some appreciation of that and suck it up.
Hmm.
You know, I think that should make me cry, but, for some reason, it's just funny.
Dad, you're funny.
No, I mean, maybe that's how it was in the olden times, but I'm not going to settle.
I want what I want.
You want it all and you can't have it all.
Or maybe I can.
- Bye, Dad.
- Bye, Amy.
So Amy would be settling? Marrying Ricky would be settling? Aw, you know what I mean.
Uh, no.
I don't know what you mean.
But I don't want my son to marry someone who would be settling.
Like he wouldn't be settling? If he's willing to settle, why shouldn't she? Excuse me? Oh, come on, they're trying to make this work without taking the final step, they had a kid, they have to get married.
No, they don't.
I know that.
I want them to think that.
Oh! Because it would be better for John.
The kid is the most important person in this, he had no say in this, why should he be the one hurt? He deserves a mom and a dad who are married to each other whether they want to be or not.
So they're both miserable, the kid should be happy.
Wow.
You are really not making a case here.
Yeah, I know.
The more I talk, the worse it sounds.
Am I wrong? Could I be wrong? I think I'm wrong, but maybe that's what I'm wrong about.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
I have a confession to make.
The other day I told Ricky not to marry Amy.
That's why I'm looking for an apartment.
I thought it was because Anne's gonna take back the house.
Yeah, that too, but mostly because I feel I betrayed you by telling Ricky not to marry Amy.
You're entitled to your opinion, I can see where you would think it's a bad idea.
So, I'm living in your house and not paying any rent and you've been a good friend and I told my son not to marry your daughter and - that's not a problem? - No.
He's not listening to you any more than she's listening to me.
He's trying his damnedest to get her to marry him.
My point is, I said it, I betrayed you.
I don't care.
I told Ricky I'd try to help him out and talk to Amy, and that was all for naught.
You have no idea how much guilt I've been holding over this? I was almost driven to drink again.
Over those two? Please.
I was so proud of them when they eloped.
And then, it's as if they missed a movie and now he's trying to drag her back to the theater.
And even if he gets her in, neither of them are going to enjoy the show - Should I go on? - Nah.
- What is the point of all this? - It's fun.
We haven't found one single person who uses algebra, therefore algebra is a complete waste of time and I've proven it.
You're still going to have to take the test, so sooner or later we're going to have to stop walking around and go back to your house and study.
No, I think we should keep going.
Unless of course we find the one freak in the universe who uses algebra and then I'll quit.
Hi.
We're taking a survey.
Oh, did you need some help calculating the results? No.
So far, it's a hundred percent.
I'm trying to get algebra removed from the requirements in high school by asking people if they've ever used algebra and so far, no one ever has.
Um, I think maybe she has.
Are you Danica McKellar? Yes, I am.
Danica McKellar? I know that name.
Are you a stripper? A what? What are you doing? Complimenting the lady.
She's an actress and a mathematician.
She writes books on math.
Math Doesn't Suck, Kiss My Math, Hot X, Girls Get Curves? All I get from that is something dirty.
He has issues with women.
And algebra.
And we have an algebra midterm to study for.
- Bye.
- No.
Wait.
- I'll help you.
- I don't need any help, he does.
And I'm helping him.
Or trying to.
Well, wait a minute.
I mean why not let her have a shot at helping me? - How many people have you interviewed? - Thirty-three, - counting you.
- And I'm the only one who uses algebra? Yeah.
So ninety-nine percent do not use algebra.
Not exactly.
Thirty-two out of 33 is not 99 percent.
I could have told him that, but he won't listen to me.
He doesn't want to believe that a girl is better in math than a guy.
I had the same problem with guys in high school.
Girls not being good at math and science is such a stereotype.
Not girls, good looking girls.
You can't look like that and be good in math, it just doesn't add up.
- Get it? - You do need help.
I don't know what you're so upset about.
Because, I wanted to be the one to inspire you to love math.
Not that stripper! She's not a stripper, although she could be one if she wanted to, I'm sure.
That is not a compliment, - that a woman looks like a stripper.
- It's not? They have to be attractive, right? They're taking their clothes off for money.
If they didn't look good, then who would pay? Am I wrong? Oh you could be a stripper.
Is that what you want me to say? Because you are good looking enough to take your clothes off for money.
If you wanted.
I mean, I wouldn't want you to do that, I hope you wouldn't do that, but - you could.
- You are so stupid.
Danica didn't seem to think I was stupid.
I'll just wait outside for my grandmother, I texted her.
I don't get it.
I'm learning algebra for you! (SIGHING) I'm hungry.
Hey.
I'm home.
Well, yes you are, how was it? (PHONE RINGING) Oh.
My phone.
- Hey, look, it's your dad.
- No! Hi, Mr.
Enriquez.
How are you? Okay, thanks.
Dinner at 8:00 with your parents.
Have fun.
I was thinking of having sex with you at 8:00, but if you want to go to dinner I'll just take care of things myself.
Well, that's an interesting threat.
It's a win/win situation for me.
I forgot to tell you that I had called them and said we'd like to discuss something with them.
Without asking me about having dinner with them first? Yeah, I called them when you were at lunch with Grace.
I don't think they should weigh in on the decision, it's none of their business.
- But it's my mother's business? - Huh? You had lunch with my mother and tried to talk to her about talking to me about staying here until we get married? She's a rat.
She's isn't supposed to say anything to you.
- She's my mother.
- Well.
Well? All right.
We'll have dinner with my parents.
That wasn't your dad on the phone, and I was just trying to make a point.
But maybe I didn't make it clear.
I'm not happy with you.
I don't like that you lie to me or that you try to use my mother.
Well, that's just because your mother agrees with me! You going to marry him? - Ricky? - Yes, Ricky.
Yeah, yeah, we're planning on getting married.
Of course, it would help if I could find my wedding rings.
Yeah, they'll turn up.
I lose everything.
I lost my engagement ring once before.
And I lost my purse with a bunch of cash in it once.
I don't know why I do that.
Hey Amy, you're going to high school, you're working after school and you're raising a three-year-old.
I think it's understandable if you might misplace things now and then.
Yeah, I know, but it was Margaret's mother's wedding band.
- She gave us her parents' wedding bands.
- Oh.
Do you think it would be horrible if I went to school in New York? I don't know.
Not if you're going for the school.
But not if you're just running away.
Or running to someone.
You're not going for Ben, are you? I didn't realize we had company.
I just have something for Ben and I just saw him pull up in the driveway.
Wait.
Those are mine! Hello.
What's going on? I knew you had these.
Did you know that he was pretending to be married to you when he was sleeping on you? All right.
That's enough.
Chloe.
You were pretending to be married to me and you stole my wedding rings? Look, they were kind of falling off your finger and so I kind of slid them off and then you moved your hand and I couldn't put them back on so I put them in my pocket and, yeah Look, I was going to give them back to you when I saw you earlier today, but you and Ricky seemed to be in the middle of something, so Yeah, we were fighting because I thought I had lost this.
Ben, this is Margaret's mother's wedding band.
She gave us her parents' wedding bands and I thought that I lost it.
You stole it? You're like crazy, do you know that? No crazier than what you are.
Look, you got what you wanted and now you don't want it only you feel too guilty to say so.
But speaking from experience, all I can tell you is do not marry someone you're not madly in love with.
Ricky's the nice guy now, and it's hard to tell a nice guy no, but nice guys know when they're being used and if you're not madly in love with Ricky, you're using him.
So end it nicely while you still can.
Hello? Did you tell Kathy she looks like a stripper? Hi.
Are you back from France? Did you? Did Kathy tell you that I trapped Don? His father did.
Did you tell my daughter that she looks like a stripper or not? It's kind of a long story, sir and I know that's one of my weaknesses, telling long stories and rambling so Yes.
What the hell is wrong with you, son? I thought she wanted me to tell her she looks like a stripper, because I had said that this other woman looks like a stripper and the other woman who looks like a stripper is also good at math, better even than Kathy, but she's old, she's like thirty, but good looking, and Kathy got a little jealous so I said it.
Yeah, I said she looks like a stripper, meaning that she's good looking.
And fit.
And healthy.
And has a nice figure.
Hey! Kathy called me.
Did someone hit you? - Yes.
My foster mother.
- Good.
(KNOCK ON DOOR) Hi, Jack's mother.
You can never remember my name.
No, no.
I can.
It's Mrs.
Stone.
I just wanted to drop off Jack's laundry.
My mom usually does his laundry.
He likes how I do his laundry better.
And I wanted to confront you.
Confront? - I know what you're doing.
- What am I doing? You're trying to find a way to break up with Jack.
No.
Where'd you get an idea like that? You're looking at colleges out of state? Yeah, but I don't know where I'm going to go to college yet, and even if I did go to college out of state, Jack and I wouldn't break up.
I think you know exactly where you're going to go and it's out of state.
And you're going to go out of state just because you can't tell Jack that you don't want him anymore.
No.
That's not true.
My son almost died.
He had his bones broken and his head smashed in and now you're going to stomp all over his heart? I don't think so.
No, I'm not I'm not gonna do that.
No.
No, you're not.
Because if you do, I might snap and come after you because I can't stand the thought of anyone hurting him again.
I'm not going to hurt him.
I don't like you.
You've never been a good girlfriend for Jack, and I don't think you'd make a good wife for Jack.
"I want to have sex.
No, I don't want to have sex.
" "Come over and let's have sex.
" "I'm sorry, I changed my mind.
" "I'm a Christian, I'm not a Christian.
" You can't make up your mind about anything.
And now, after dragging Jack back into this relationship, honey, you are not breaking up with him, not this year not next year, and not the year after that.
You are not breaking up with him until I say you are.
Is Reverend Stone with you or ? No.
And if you call him and tell him I said this to you, I'll deny it, tell him you're crazy and he'll just nod in agreement.
Okay.
I hope I didn't scare you, I'm just protecting my son.
Okay Mrs.
Stone.
Didi.
(EXHALING) John, I though I told you to put those cookies down.
John.
Uh, what is that? That's not that chocolate that I told you you couldn't have, is it? The thing about taking care of a small child is that you have to be physically active.
You can't just lie on the couch and read magazines, shouting orders.
We're not reading magazines.
We got tired.
Amy said an hour or two, she's been gone all day.
Okay well, you can go now, I've got it.
No, we're not going to leave you with this mess, we're going to help you clean up.
All right, I'll get the cleaning supplies and the vacuum cleaner and you can help me clean up.
Why did you say that? We were almost out of here.
I didn't think he was actually going to let us clean up.
I mean, we already took care of a three-year-old all day.
Yeah, if I were Amy, I would go to school in New York.
Yeah, I mean he's cute, but I'd leave him here with Ricky.
A boy needs his father.
I would be more than happy to stay here with John while Amy goes to school in New York, if that's what Amy wants to do.
I love Amy.
And I want to be married to Amy.
Any time she wants to get married.
Now.
Later.
Whenever.
- Aw! - Aw! I don't even know if she likes me.
I know.
I don't know what's going on with her.
I think she feels trapped.
No, that's all right, tell me.
- I don't know what to do.
- I don't know either.
But I don't think she should go to New York, I think that's kind of selfish.
But maybe when you're both out of college and John is a little older and in school, and if Mr.
Boykewich has a job for you there, then you could go.
But splitting up and leaving John with one of you, I don't know.
You think she just doesn't want to be married to me? I mean, she went with me to get married and now (SIGHS) I don't think she wants to get married.
We're supposed to get married this summer, when school is out, but I'm not going to push her.
No, don't push her.
No.
So Why would you marry her other than she's John's mother? Isn't that reason enough? Are you in love with her? I love her.
- Well, is the sex okay? - Madison! Well, she won't tell us.
Then I'm not going to either, but yes, it is.
So you love her but you're not in love with her? I don't know what that means.
Isn't it enough that I love her? Is it enough for you? Hey.
Sorry, so sorry.
After I went over to my dad's house, I just needed some time to myself and Whoa.
What happened in here? Your friends are very active babysitters.
And lenient.
I'll clean it up.
Oh, no, no.
We'll clean it up.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Bye.
I found them.
So, let's set a date.
You really think I could be a stripper? If I answer that question, are you going to call your dad again? No.
Then yeah, sure.
I think you're hot.
- Hotter than Miss Math Books? - Well, yeah.
I don't know why I got so jealous before.
I kind of like it when you're jealous.
Except for the fact that you called your dad.
Hey, you think I could be a stripper? A male stripper? I wonder how old you have to be to take off your clothes.
You think they make a lot of money? I have to go.
I got it.
Well, fancy meeting you here.
Do you have a reservation? No, but I believe we have an in here.
All right, I'll get you a booth.
I'm still not giving you twenty grand, toots.
I hear the steaks are pretty good here.
- Enjoy.
- This way.
That's all you can tell me, is I shouldn't marry the woman I love? Love another woman.
And by the way, you're twenty-three years old, you just got out of college, you don't have to get married.
- You can wait.
- I'm engaged, Dad.
Eh, people get engaged all the time.
Get unengaged or stay engaged for 10 years, then decide.
Mom seems to agree with Adrian, that I should stay here.
Or she wants us to get married first and then move to New York.
Which would mean, we were getting married right away.
She's a minister, I'm a cop.
We don't always see things the same way.
Son, go to New York, do a good job, have a good time.
You are young, enjoy your life, see the world.
I want to see it with Adrian.
She doesn't want to see it with you.
She wants to stay here and go to school.
She's really smart, she wants to be an attorney, practice family law.
Good for her.
What do you want to do? I'm doing what I want to do, I'm moving to New York and I'm making money and I'm doing something I find meaningful, but it won't mean anything to me really, unless I have someone to share it with.
If the shoe was on the other foot, would you go to New York with her? Yeah, definitely.
(CHUCKLING) What? I've been in love with you since the day I first saw you.
We were meant for each other.
I want to live with you and I want you to have my babies.
(EXHALING) Would you like fries with that? (CLEARING THROAT) Yeah.
Well, I asked you to have dinner with me because, one, I want to apologize for being insensitive to your past.
Huh? I shouldn't have brought up dating.
When? When you were in my room this morning losing it because I suggested you might go out on a date some time? You know, that whole screaming and yelling thing that you did? Oh.
Yeah.
Sorry.
PMS.
What? I get that way for a couple of hours every month.
But it's just a couple of hours.
So you're not in the least bit offended by what I said to you? No.
All right, secondly, I'd like to talk to you about repeating things that I say to you, back to Dad.
Yeah, why do you do that? Why do you tell me things that you don't want him to know? I can't help but tell him.
I love him.
I love Leo.
I have to rat you out.
If I didn't, I would be hiding things from him that he doesn't know and I owe it to him to tell him everything.
I'm an only child, so having a sister is new to me, but I had thought that one of the benefits of having a sister is that I could talk to you and you could talk to me and no one would talk to him.
Why? Do you need to talk about Amy? Yeah, I do.
But you can't repeat what I say back to Dad.
Go ahead.
I think she's finally starting to be Amy.
She's starting to see herself as someone other than John's mother.
She's becoming her own person.
Which you think will lead to becoming your own person? Perhaps.
Didn't I just tell you you say to your father? I never learn, that's my problem.
So So, I'm very proud of you.
I love you, George.
And I love you.
So let's stop and make it official.
Hi, Mom.
Please tell me you're not back to ground zero.
On whether or not I go here? That might have something to do with it.
There was a $2,000 application fee.
- It's non-refundable.
- Non-refundable? I recognize you from the newspapers.
Johnny D.
I'm going to lose $2,000 if I decide not to go to the school.
Well, you wanted to be sure you got in, and, well, you got in.
Ricky would never be comfortable with my coming to school here if you're here.
If you were really in love with Ricky and you cared what he thought, you wouldn't even consider leaving him to come to school here.
This lawyer came to see me today and he said I could sue the school and make millions of dollars and they wouldn't have to pay it, it would be their insurance company.
What? - Omar is leaving me! - What? This company he works for wants him in New York.
How could you think this is about money? I want to feel satisfied that I have made every effort to make this relationship work out.
Well, that's pretty much what someone says when they want out of a relationship without any guilt.
I knew it was about money.
You tricked me.
Yeah, I did.
And you fell for it.
Does your wife want anything else? Shh.
No, no.
We're fine.
(SIGHS) I have to go, I have to get him to bed.
You going to tell me what you came over here for or not? I know you came over here for something other than a free meal.
All right, I just I feel funny talking in front of him.
He's asleep.
And he's three.
He won't remember.
Go ahead.
I know Amy wants to go to school in New York, and I don't think she wants to get married before she goes.
I'm trying, I'm really trying to give her what she wants, to make going to school in New York possible.
But I don't really know exactly how I'm going to do that.
That's because there's no way to do that.
There's no way she can go to school in New York and be married to you and be a responsible wife and mother.
I know it's tough being a teenage mom, but Amy's had a lot of support, a lot of financial support.
What, you supposed to pay for everything for the next four years? I'd like to, but we need some help paying for wherever Amy wants to live in New York.
You shut that down right now.
All right? She does not need to get whatever she wants, it's not good for her, really, shut that down.
She should be thinking about her son and about you, frankly.
You've been good to Amy.
Well, except for getting her pregnant.
But for the last few years anyway.
You two should get married this summer like you said you would, and she should stay in California to go to school.
I don't think she's going to get married to me this summer or stay here to go to school.
She wants what she wants.
No.
You have to make her stay here and get married and go to school.
I don't want to make her.
I want her to want to stay here, - and I want her to want to get married, but - But what? But she doesn't want to do that so I want her to have what she wants because I did get her pregnant.
Oh.
Guilt.
I see.
You planning to pay for that little slip-up the rest of your life? Uh, yeah.
Because I want John around for the rest of my life and it's the responsible thing to do.
How the hell are you going to live in two different cities and be parents to a three-year-old? If you were willing to help Amy out with the housing in New York.
No.
I am not willing.
And I can't.
And I bought this place so I would not be able to help anyone out because I don't want to help anyone out, I want to tie up all my money in something that I want.
I earned it and I'm going to spend it, and I'm not going to spend it on Anne, or Amy, or Ashley, I'm going to spend it on me.
I did already.
You know what, I'll talk to Amy, I'll be the bad guy.
Oh, no, no, no.
No.
I don't want you to do that.
You came to me for help, that's the help I can give you.
That's okay.
I was just exploring some options, trying to figure out a plan.
It's not possible! Do not dream this dream with Amy! Could you please put the chair backs up, we should be landing shortly.
Ew! Get off me! Sorry.
You were on me first.
So you were intentionally on me? Geez, Ben.
Give it up.
It was nice while it lasted.
(GROANING) * Falling in love is such an easy thing to do * Birds can do it * We can do it * Let's stop talking * Let's get to it * Let's fall in love I got it.
I don't know what "it" is, but it's awfully early for you to be up and getting anything.
You got what? I got a good twenty-four signatures, so far.
Is this something political? No, it's not, it reaches across all politics, all socio-economic groups, all religions and faiths and philosophies.
Or maybe not, but it's big.
Out of all people surveyed, adult people, not one has ever used algebra in their daily life or even at work.
I wish I had this coffee before you came in.
Have you ever used algebra in your work or in your life? - No.
- Twenty-five.
And the day isn't over.
Aren't you supposed to be going over to Kathy's to study for the mid-term today? Yeah, but what's the point? I'm never gonna use algebra.
I'm afraid you are.
You're going to be taking a second year of algebra in your junior year.
I'm afraid I'm not.
Because if I keep going with this, no one's going to be taking algebra.
I'm going to change things around here.
Around where? Around school, the entire school system.
I'm gonna get algebra removed from the school curriculum.
Well, unless you're going to make that to happen by Monday, I suggest you get on over to Kathy's and get some help with that midterm.
What's the worst that can happen if I just fail algebra? I mean, I should fail, otherwise there's no point to my efforts to get algebra removed from schools.
Ethan, I I agree with you in that requiring all students to take algebra could possibly keep a student who's bad at algebra from succeeding in school overall.
And even though algebra is used by accountants, financial planners, engineers, physicists, and a lot of occupations, not everyone does get algebra and not everyone uses it in their adult life.
But some people do.
I haven't found one.
Good morning.
Well, good morning.
What's all this? I thought you might like breakfast in bed.
I should be making you breakfast in bed.
So, is this what you call being your own person? Waiting on me? Yes.
I wanted to make you breakfast and I did.
But you're making me breakfast because you don't want to go to New York.
Not true.
I wanna go, just maybe not this year.
It's something we have to figure out.
I like that.
I like that it's something "we" have to figure out, sounds like two mature adults in a healthy relationship.
Omar, I'm really proud of you, but I want you to be proud of me too.
And if I'm just your live-in girlfriend trying to get into college while you have this big important job, then I don't think you're going to be so proud of me and I'm certainly not going to be proud of me.
Look, I need to finish all my core classes and it doesn't cost anything for me to live here, I don't know, maybe you could work it out with your company so you can work from here the first year.
The first teachers we're working with are in New York, if I'm going to be involved in this project from the ground up, I have to be there.
Okay.
But not every day, not every weekend, not all the time.
Why don't you find a couple of schools that look good to you in New York, and let's see whether or not your credits would transfer and how long it'll take you to get in.
And you're not my girlfriend, you're my fiancée.
We're getting married.
Maybe you could even get into a college in New York for next fall, and in that case, I guess you should continue classes here, but we don't know, maybe you can get in.
Let's get all the information before we make any decisions.
- That sounds totally reasonable to me.
- Good.
So you made me breakfast, why don't we take a drive to the beach later and I'll buy you lunch? Mmm.
Sorry.
I told Grace I'd have lunch with her.
- You're having lunch with Grace? - Mmm-hmm.
Enjoy.
I just want some options, that's all.
And I'll probably go to school right here next fall, but I don't have any acceptance letters yet, but I do have options.
And it's April, I have a month or two to decide.
Plus the school we went to visit in Utah, it was amazing.
And it's really only like four or five hours away if you drive? Yeah.
I guess.
But four or five hours is four or five hours.
You want to be four or five hours from me? I don't want to be, but I can't like move the school here.
Well, I'm already so far behind, I could just transfer and go with you.
Um, I'm sure you could but I think we should wait to see how it goes when you get your cast off.
You're probably going to be playing football again next fall.
Yeah, but it wouldn't mean anything if you weren't here to watch.
That's sweet.
I saw this class, it's for young couples who want to get married, who aren't engaged yet.
It's a thing on campus.
You want to take that class with me, as kind of a first step? Well, I just I feel like I'm just finishing high school and I have all these decisions to make about college.
Maybe it's just not the right time.
It's spring, this is when people are in love.
I think the class is just starting up.
Really? Huh.
How long is the class? It's a couple of hours, once a week for four weeks.
Huh.
Well.
Let me think about it.
It's through the campus ministry.
Okay! I'll think about it.
Amy! Someone is waiting to say good morning.
Hey.
Hey, buddy.
Hi.
Wanna get in bed with Mommy? No, he doesn't.
He wants Mommy to get out of bed.
It's 9:00.
- Is it? - Yeah.
I was so tired.
Yeah, nothing I can do about that.
Now I have to go to work.
Are you going to drop John off? - Drop him off where? It's Saturday.
- Oh, right.
I forgot.
Really, if you're going to get a shower before I leave, you have to get up, I need to get downstairs.
I showered when I got in.
Did John have breakfast? - At 6:00.
- Oh.
Amy? Don't you want to get up? Yes.
Yes, Ricky.
All right, I'll get up.
I'm getting up.
- You want some breakfast? - No, I'm fine, you can go.
I know I can go, I just thought I'd make you breakfast, hear about your trip.
I'll tell you when you get home from work, there's not that much to tell.
- Really? - Really.
Did you have a good time? Wasn't really there to have a good time, I was there to check out the school and we'll talk later.
Where'd you lose my mother's wedding band? - What? - I notice you're not wearing your wedding band or your engagement ring.
I must have taken them off and put them in my purse.
Yeah.
You must have.
At a party? Didn't want anyone to know you're married? Well, I'm not married, but no.
I think maybe I Yes, yes, I took them off when I was going through security at the airport.
Because I didn't want to set off any alarms or anything.
So, they have to be in my purse.
I'll find them, you go to work.
You better.
It's my mother's wedding band.
It means a lot to her even if it means nothing to you and she gave it to you as a wedding gift.
We're not even married and I don't think we're going to be getting married, and we have to give the rings back if we're not getting married.
Yeah, of course.
Of course, we're not getting married or, of course, we're giving the rings back? Ugh, what happened to, "Welcome home, it's so good to see you?" It was good to see you until I noticed you weren't wearing your rings.
- We have to talk.
- I said that.
Hey! What did you bring me? Bring you? What did I bring you? - From? - New York? Anything you can get in New York, you can get here.
You can't get a "I heart New York" T-shirt here.
Did you want an "I heart New York" T-shirt? I can order one over the internet for you, but later, I gotta go to work.
That's not the same, ordering over the internet.
So, how was it? Was it fun? - What'd you do? - I had some fun.
Last night, coming back, Amy fell asleep on me and I pretended to be married to her.
And she didn't know you were pretending to be married? No.
- So how was the marriage? - Short.
That was the highlight of your trip to New York? No.
Don't tell my dad, but I found an apartment.
If I could get that apartment, I would definitely go to Hudson University.
Why don't you get a dorm room and be like a normal person for a change? I'm getting a dorm room too, but I want the apartment.
Dorms are too loud.
You can't really sleep in them and you can't study, but they're great for social purposes.
And I have to go to work now, like a normal person, so you have to go.
You didn't meet any girls there? I met a few.
I even had a date.
- Kind of.
- No details, please.
You know, maybe you should go out some time.
Have you met somebody that you would go out with? Maybe you could call them and that would give you another reason to get out of my room other than I have to go to work.
What? Have you? No.
No, I haven't met a single guy who wouldn't think that dating an ex-hooker was all about getting her to have free sex.
I forgot.
Sorry.
Nice you can forget, I can't forget.
And, just for the record, I was forced into doing what I did! I know, I know, I said I was sorry.
I'm never going to have a normal life, you know, because anyone I would ever be interested in would never be interested in me because I am an ex-hooker! My face was on the cover of a newspaper! Anyone can go on the internet and see this and read "hooker.
" I hate that word.
I hate it! Like I could ever get a date! I hate you! Guess I should have gotten her the T-shirt.
I'm on my way to work.
I forgot about her history, I just asked if she'd found somebody to date.
I I'll Geez.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'll fix it, I will.
You will.
Hey! What's going on? Uh, Lauren, what's going on? I don't know, what's going on with you, Madison? We're babysitting.
Amy or John? - John.
- And where's Amy? I guess that's up to you and Amy.
Yeah.
We don't know where she is or where she's going or anything.
(SIGHING) Well, look who's here.
Hello, Benjamin.
Good to see you again.
Good to be here.
So what do you need me to do? There's a bunch of boxes and packing in the freezer that need to be removed.
Why is he telling me and you're not telling me? Because he's taking over on Saturdays while I take off.
- For how long? - For as long as I want.
So, uh, now you're my boss? I'm in charge of getting things done on Saturday and that's what needs to get done this Saturday.
We had two large deliveries yesterday.
- Thanks.
- Oh, no.
No, thank you.
I won't be spending my day in the freezer.
Until you learn how to run the cash register, package the meat or something about cooking, there's really not a lot else you can do.
- It's a fine line.
- I know that.
Just keep it business, I don't want any trouble, but I would love Saturdays off.
And I would love the extra pay.
I don't know what I could have done with them.
I swear I never take them off, I'm so afraid of losing them.
They had to have fallen off somewhere.
Like at a party or something? No.
Are you sure? Yeah, I'm sure.
I wasn't at any parties.
I wanted to go to some parties, but I didn't because I didn't want Ricky to get upset and have any reason to tell me not to go to school there.
Hey, bud! Hi.
What is that? I found it.
Thank you.
Ew.
It's disgusting.
It's an old band aid.
Okay.
But, Amy, don't you see that Ricky already has a reason to tell you not to go to school in New York? Yeah, what would you do with John? Well, either I'll take him with me or else he'll stay here with Ricky.
I'll get an apartment close to school and I'll put John in day care and I'll go to school.
That's going to be really hard.
Yeah, and really expensive.
I mean, who's going to pay for that? I have a scholarship.
That covers an apartment and day care? How much money does Ricky make working in that butcher shop? Not enough.
So if you could take care of John, then I'll go talk to my dad and see if he'd be willing to help me out.
Us out.
Us.
Are you still getting married? You guys, we're, like, already living together, we're engaged, we have a kid, practically married already.
I don't see what the big deal is.
All right, I'll be back.
I'll just going to go say bye to John.
She's lost her mind.
She's not gonna marry Ricky.
I can't believe it! It's what she always wanted.
I know! And it's like she had a baby, but she doesn't know what a baby is.
Don't worry about a thing.
- Yeah, we'll be fine.
- Yeah, we're fine.
And, uh, where did you tell Ricky that you're going? Just so we know.
I just want to talk to my Dad.
Amy, you were gone a couple of days, you don't see your dad every day when you're here.
- I know that.
- You can't take John with you? We need babysitters? It's just for an hour or two.
Are you going over to ask for a loan? I've already asked for a loan for you.
He said no.
Well, you're not his daughter.
Oh.
Hi.
Look, about last night Do you mind? We're having a personal conversation here.
No we're not, we're working here.
What about last night? I'm sorry, I'm carrying heavy boxes here.
We're going to be having a lot more deliveries, because we're the local supplier for Geoff's now.
Just so you know.
I got George to switch over to us.
So I'll be doing a lot more of this.
Probably.
But I'll be doing a lot more of that too.
And you'll be doing a whole lot more of this after I go off to school.
Yeah.
Unless I hire someone else or Bunny hires someone else.
Are you going off to school? Yes.
I am.
And, look, I'm going to be getting an apartment.
If Amy, or you and Amy and John, would care to share it with me I mean, help you out with your expenses.
Just something to think about, boss.
Ok, so, I just need about, $18,000 plus the deposit.
Amy, what's 1500 times 12? Oh, right.
Eighteen thousand.
I just need $18,000 plus the deposit.
Just think of it as a student loan.
The Bank of Dad folded.
There are no more loans.
You're over 18.
You have your own family.
You have your own finances.
Welcome to the world of adults.
Where, by the way, people take care of their own children.
- Uh, you're not taking care of me.
- Oh, but I am.
The whole goal of any parent is to make sure the child is self-sufficient.
Let's see what you can do without my help.
Go get 'em, tiger.
Dad, I will be self-sufficient, once I get out of college, but right now I need a loan.
So you can go to New York to go to college, away from your husband and son.
I don't know if I'm taking John with me yet or not, I mean, maybe I will.
If I can also come up with the money for a day care.
- You're not going anywhere.
- I am, I'm going somewhere.
And if you don't want to help me then fine.
I don't want to help you.
You know why? You have no business going to New York.
You should stay right here, and get married, and raise your son with your husband and go to college.
You get a free apartment and free day care.
Who gets a free apartment and free day care? I work at that day care.
And I'm sick of working at that day care.
Listen to what I'm saying here, Amy, I've always given you good advice, remember all the things I've been right about in the past? Eat your vegetables, brush your teeth, and don't have sex until you're married.
I took your advice on two out of the three.
Dad, come on.
No, you're talking about twenty grand, I just bought a restaurant.
I don't have twenty grand.
And if I did, I wouldn't give it to you because it's the wrong thing to do.
All right.
Well, fine.
I just had to ask.
So now you're going to go ask your mother? Or Nora or Margaret.
Because they'll understand education is important to a woman.
So is money.
See if any of those broads give you twenty grand.
- Yeah, I will.
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR) Hi.
Who are you? What do you want? Aren't you the church organist? Kathy, Ethan.
Is everything okay? Yeah, we're taking a survey.
Hi.
I'm Kathy.
Oh yeah, the one who didn't listen to her father either, how you doing? Well.
Thank you.
We just wanted to get your signature on something.
No politics.
Interferes with business, I don't want any calls or emails.
What survey? Is this something for school? Yeah.
Have you ever used algebra in your adult life? No.
And don't ask her, she's not an adult.
No one has.
That's why I feel it shouldn't be taught in school, or it should be an elective.
Is this to avoid a test? Yes.
A midterm.
He's avoiding, not me.
Let me tell you something, all of you.
Sometimes you got to do things you don't want to do.
And if you don't get anything else out of taking algebra, you should get that.
You got it? Get out of here.
Oh, nice.
You are not going to New York.
The whole thing is ridiculous.
Dad, if I don't go now, I may never have this chance again.
Amy, that's what being a parent is all about.
Missing opportunities in life.
Never doing what you really want to do.
Never being all you could have been.
It's about settling.
Settle.
I don't care if you love Ricky or not.
He's John's father, he's good to you, he's good to your son, he's a hard worker, and he's come back from the depths of hell to be a decent human being.
So you get some appreciation of that and suck it up.
Hmm.
You know, I think that should make me cry, but, for some reason, it's just funny.
Dad, you're funny.
No, I mean, maybe that's how it was in the olden times, but I'm not going to settle.
I want what I want.
You want it all and you can't have it all.
Or maybe I can.
- Bye, Dad.
- Bye, Amy.
So Amy would be settling? Marrying Ricky would be settling? Aw, you know what I mean.
Uh, no.
I don't know what you mean.
But I don't want my son to marry someone who would be settling.
Like he wouldn't be settling? If he's willing to settle, why shouldn't she? Excuse me? Oh, come on, they're trying to make this work without taking the final step, they had a kid, they have to get married.
No, they don't.
I know that.
I want them to think that.
Oh! Because it would be better for John.
The kid is the most important person in this, he had no say in this, why should he be the one hurt? He deserves a mom and a dad who are married to each other whether they want to be or not.
So they're both miserable, the kid should be happy.
Wow.
You are really not making a case here.
Yeah, I know.
The more I talk, the worse it sounds.
Am I wrong? Could I be wrong? I think I'm wrong, but maybe that's what I'm wrong about.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
I have a confession to make.
The other day I told Ricky not to marry Amy.
That's why I'm looking for an apartment.
I thought it was because Anne's gonna take back the house.
Yeah, that too, but mostly because I feel I betrayed you by telling Ricky not to marry Amy.
You're entitled to your opinion, I can see where you would think it's a bad idea.
So, I'm living in your house and not paying any rent and you've been a good friend and I told my son not to marry your daughter and - that's not a problem? - No.
He's not listening to you any more than she's listening to me.
He's trying his damnedest to get her to marry him.
My point is, I said it, I betrayed you.
I don't care.
I told Ricky I'd try to help him out and talk to Amy, and that was all for naught.
You have no idea how much guilt I've been holding over this? I was almost driven to drink again.
Over those two? Please.
I was so proud of them when they eloped.
And then, it's as if they missed a movie and now he's trying to drag her back to the theater.
And even if he gets her in, neither of them are going to enjoy the show - Should I go on? - Nah.
- What is the point of all this? - It's fun.
We haven't found one single person who uses algebra, therefore algebra is a complete waste of time and I've proven it.
You're still going to have to take the test, so sooner or later we're going to have to stop walking around and go back to your house and study.
No, I think we should keep going.
Unless of course we find the one freak in the universe who uses algebra and then I'll quit.
Hi.
We're taking a survey.
Oh, did you need some help calculating the results? No.
So far, it's a hundred percent.
I'm trying to get algebra removed from the requirements in high school by asking people if they've ever used algebra and so far, no one ever has.
Um, I think maybe she has.
Are you Danica McKellar? Yes, I am.
Danica McKellar? I know that name.
Are you a stripper? A what? What are you doing? Complimenting the lady.
She's an actress and a mathematician.
She writes books on math.
Math Doesn't Suck, Kiss My Math, Hot X, Girls Get Curves? All I get from that is something dirty.
He has issues with women.
And algebra.
And we have an algebra midterm to study for.
- Bye.
- No.
Wait.
- I'll help you.
- I don't need any help, he does.
And I'm helping him.
Or trying to.
Well, wait a minute.
I mean why not let her have a shot at helping me? - How many people have you interviewed? - Thirty-three, - counting you.
- And I'm the only one who uses algebra? Yeah.
So ninety-nine percent do not use algebra.
Not exactly.
Thirty-two out of 33 is not 99 percent.
I could have told him that, but he won't listen to me.
He doesn't want to believe that a girl is better in math than a guy.
I had the same problem with guys in high school.
Girls not being good at math and science is such a stereotype.
Not girls, good looking girls.
You can't look like that and be good in math, it just doesn't add up.
- Get it? - You do need help.
I don't know what you're so upset about.
Because, I wanted to be the one to inspire you to love math.
Not that stripper! She's not a stripper, although she could be one if she wanted to, I'm sure.
That is not a compliment, - that a woman looks like a stripper.
- It's not? They have to be attractive, right? They're taking their clothes off for money.
If they didn't look good, then who would pay? Am I wrong? Oh you could be a stripper.
Is that what you want me to say? Because you are good looking enough to take your clothes off for money.
If you wanted.
I mean, I wouldn't want you to do that, I hope you wouldn't do that, but - you could.
- You are so stupid.
Danica didn't seem to think I was stupid.
I'll just wait outside for my grandmother, I texted her.
I don't get it.
I'm learning algebra for you! (SIGHING) I'm hungry.
Hey.
I'm home.
Well, yes you are, how was it? (PHONE RINGING) Oh.
My phone.
- Hey, look, it's your dad.
- No! Hi, Mr.
Enriquez.
How are you? Okay, thanks.
Dinner at 8:00 with your parents.
Have fun.
I was thinking of having sex with you at 8:00, but if you want to go to dinner I'll just take care of things myself.
Well, that's an interesting threat.
It's a win/win situation for me.
I forgot to tell you that I had called them and said we'd like to discuss something with them.
Without asking me about having dinner with them first? Yeah, I called them when you were at lunch with Grace.
I don't think they should weigh in on the decision, it's none of their business.
- But it's my mother's business? - Huh? You had lunch with my mother and tried to talk to her about talking to me about staying here until we get married? She's a rat.
She's isn't supposed to say anything to you.
- She's my mother.
- Well.
Well? All right.
We'll have dinner with my parents.
That wasn't your dad on the phone, and I was just trying to make a point.
But maybe I didn't make it clear.
I'm not happy with you.
I don't like that you lie to me or that you try to use my mother.
Well, that's just because your mother agrees with me! You going to marry him? - Ricky? - Yes, Ricky.
Yeah, yeah, we're planning on getting married.
Of course, it would help if I could find my wedding rings.
Yeah, they'll turn up.
I lose everything.
I lost my engagement ring once before.
And I lost my purse with a bunch of cash in it once.
I don't know why I do that.
Hey Amy, you're going to high school, you're working after school and you're raising a three-year-old.
I think it's understandable if you might misplace things now and then.
Yeah, I know, but it was Margaret's mother's wedding band.
- She gave us her parents' wedding bands.
- Oh.
Do you think it would be horrible if I went to school in New York? I don't know.
Not if you're going for the school.
But not if you're just running away.
Or running to someone.
You're not going for Ben, are you? I didn't realize we had company.
I just have something for Ben and I just saw him pull up in the driveway.
Wait.
Those are mine! Hello.
What's going on? I knew you had these.
Did you know that he was pretending to be married to you when he was sleeping on you? All right.
That's enough.
Chloe.
You were pretending to be married to me and you stole my wedding rings? Look, they were kind of falling off your finger and so I kind of slid them off and then you moved your hand and I couldn't put them back on so I put them in my pocket and, yeah Look, I was going to give them back to you when I saw you earlier today, but you and Ricky seemed to be in the middle of something, so Yeah, we were fighting because I thought I had lost this.
Ben, this is Margaret's mother's wedding band.
She gave us her parents' wedding bands and I thought that I lost it.
You stole it? You're like crazy, do you know that? No crazier than what you are.
Look, you got what you wanted and now you don't want it only you feel too guilty to say so.
But speaking from experience, all I can tell you is do not marry someone you're not madly in love with.
Ricky's the nice guy now, and it's hard to tell a nice guy no, but nice guys know when they're being used and if you're not madly in love with Ricky, you're using him.
So end it nicely while you still can.
Hello? Did you tell Kathy she looks like a stripper? Hi.
Are you back from France? Did you? Did Kathy tell you that I trapped Don? His father did.
Did you tell my daughter that she looks like a stripper or not? It's kind of a long story, sir and I know that's one of my weaknesses, telling long stories and rambling so Yes.
What the hell is wrong with you, son? I thought she wanted me to tell her she looks like a stripper, because I had said that this other woman looks like a stripper and the other woman who looks like a stripper is also good at math, better even than Kathy, but she's old, she's like thirty, but good looking, and Kathy got a little jealous so I said it.
Yeah, I said she looks like a stripper, meaning that she's good looking.
And fit.
And healthy.
And has a nice figure.
Hey! Kathy called me.
Did someone hit you? - Yes.
My foster mother.
- Good.
(KNOCK ON DOOR) Hi, Jack's mother.
You can never remember my name.
No, no.
I can.
It's Mrs.
Stone.
I just wanted to drop off Jack's laundry.
My mom usually does his laundry.
He likes how I do his laundry better.
And I wanted to confront you.
Confront? - I know what you're doing.
- What am I doing? You're trying to find a way to break up with Jack.
No.
Where'd you get an idea like that? You're looking at colleges out of state? Yeah, but I don't know where I'm going to go to college yet, and even if I did go to college out of state, Jack and I wouldn't break up.
I think you know exactly where you're going to go and it's out of state.
And you're going to go out of state just because you can't tell Jack that you don't want him anymore.
No.
That's not true.
My son almost died.
He had his bones broken and his head smashed in and now you're going to stomp all over his heart? I don't think so.
No, I'm not I'm not gonna do that.
No.
No, you're not.
Because if you do, I might snap and come after you because I can't stand the thought of anyone hurting him again.
I'm not going to hurt him.
I don't like you.
You've never been a good girlfriend for Jack, and I don't think you'd make a good wife for Jack.
"I want to have sex.
No, I don't want to have sex.
" "Come over and let's have sex.
" "I'm sorry, I changed my mind.
" "I'm a Christian, I'm not a Christian.
" You can't make up your mind about anything.
And now, after dragging Jack back into this relationship, honey, you are not breaking up with him, not this year not next year, and not the year after that.
You are not breaking up with him until I say you are.
Is Reverend Stone with you or ? No.
And if you call him and tell him I said this to you, I'll deny it, tell him you're crazy and he'll just nod in agreement.
Okay.
I hope I didn't scare you, I'm just protecting my son.
Okay Mrs.
Stone.
Didi.
(EXHALING) John, I though I told you to put those cookies down.
John.
Uh, what is that? That's not that chocolate that I told you you couldn't have, is it? The thing about taking care of a small child is that you have to be physically active.
You can't just lie on the couch and read magazines, shouting orders.
We're not reading magazines.
We got tired.
Amy said an hour or two, she's been gone all day.
Okay well, you can go now, I've got it.
No, we're not going to leave you with this mess, we're going to help you clean up.
All right, I'll get the cleaning supplies and the vacuum cleaner and you can help me clean up.
Why did you say that? We were almost out of here.
I didn't think he was actually going to let us clean up.
I mean, we already took care of a three-year-old all day.
Yeah, if I were Amy, I would go to school in New York.
Yeah, I mean he's cute, but I'd leave him here with Ricky.
A boy needs his father.
I would be more than happy to stay here with John while Amy goes to school in New York, if that's what Amy wants to do.
I love Amy.
And I want to be married to Amy.
Any time she wants to get married.
Now.
Later.
Whenever.
- Aw! - Aw! I don't even know if she likes me.
I know.
I don't know what's going on with her.
I think she feels trapped.
No, that's all right, tell me.
- I don't know what to do.
- I don't know either.
But I don't think she should go to New York, I think that's kind of selfish.
But maybe when you're both out of college and John is a little older and in school, and if Mr.
Boykewich has a job for you there, then you could go.
But splitting up and leaving John with one of you, I don't know.
You think she just doesn't want to be married to me? I mean, she went with me to get married and now (SIGHS) I don't think she wants to get married.
We're supposed to get married this summer, when school is out, but I'm not going to push her.
No, don't push her.
No.
So Why would you marry her other than she's John's mother? Isn't that reason enough? Are you in love with her? I love her.
- Well, is the sex okay? - Madison! Well, she won't tell us.
Then I'm not going to either, but yes, it is.
So you love her but you're not in love with her? I don't know what that means.
Isn't it enough that I love her? Is it enough for you? Hey.
Sorry, so sorry.
After I went over to my dad's house, I just needed some time to myself and Whoa.
What happened in here? Your friends are very active babysitters.
And lenient.
I'll clean it up.
Oh, no, no.
We'll clean it up.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Bye.
I found them.
So, let's set a date.
You really think I could be a stripper? If I answer that question, are you going to call your dad again? No.
Then yeah, sure.
I think you're hot.
- Hotter than Miss Math Books? - Well, yeah.
I don't know why I got so jealous before.
I kind of like it when you're jealous.
Except for the fact that you called your dad.
Hey, you think I could be a stripper? A male stripper? I wonder how old you have to be to take off your clothes.
You think they make a lot of money? I have to go.
I got it.
Well, fancy meeting you here.
Do you have a reservation? No, but I believe we have an in here.
All right, I'll get you a booth.
I'm still not giving you twenty grand, toots.
I hear the steaks are pretty good here.
- Enjoy.
- This way.
That's all you can tell me, is I shouldn't marry the woman I love? Love another woman.
And by the way, you're twenty-three years old, you just got out of college, you don't have to get married.
- You can wait.
- I'm engaged, Dad.
Eh, people get engaged all the time.
Get unengaged or stay engaged for 10 years, then decide.
Mom seems to agree with Adrian, that I should stay here.
Or she wants us to get married first and then move to New York.
Which would mean, we were getting married right away.
She's a minister, I'm a cop.
We don't always see things the same way.
Son, go to New York, do a good job, have a good time.
You are young, enjoy your life, see the world.
I want to see it with Adrian.
She doesn't want to see it with you.
She wants to stay here and go to school.
She's really smart, she wants to be an attorney, practice family law.
Good for her.
What do you want to do? I'm doing what I want to do, I'm moving to New York and I'm making money and I'm doing something I find meaningful, but it won't mean anything to me really, unless I have someone to share it with.
If the shoe was on the other foot, would you go to New York with her? Yeah, definitely.
(CHUCKLING) What? I've been in love with you since the day I first saw you.
We were meant for each other.
I want to live with you and I want you to have my babies.
(EXHALING) Would you like fries with that? (CLEARING THROAT) Yeah.
Well, I asked you to have dinner with me because, one, I want to apologize for being insensitive to your past.
Huh? I shouldn't have brought up dating.
When? When you were in my room this morning losing it because I suggested you might go out on a date some time? You know, that whole screaming and yelling thing that you did? Oh.
Yeah.
Sorry.
PMS.
What? I get that way for a couple of hours every month.
But it's just a couple of hours.
So you're not in the least bit offended by what I said to you? No.
All right, secondly, I'd like to talk to you about repeating things that I say to you, back to Dad.
Yeah, why do you do that? Why do you tell me things that you don't want him to know? I can't help but tell him.
I love him.
I love Leo.
I have to rat you out.
If I didn't, I would be hiding things from him that he doesn't know and I owe it to him to tell him everything.
I'm an only child, so having a sister is new to me, but I had thought that one of the benefits of having a sister is that I could talk to you and you could talk to me and no one would talk to him.
Why? Do you need to talk about Amy? Yeah, I do.
But you can't repeat what I say back to Dad.
Go ahead.
I think she's finally starting to be Amy.
She's starting to see herself as someone other than John's mother.
She's becoming her own person.
Which you think will lead to becoming your own person? Perhaps.
Didn't I just tell you you say to your father? I never learn, that's my problem.
So So, I'm very proud of you.
I love you, George.
And I love you.
So let's stop and make it official.
Hi, Mom.
Please tell me you're not back to ground zero.