A.N.T. Farm (2011) s01e16 Episode Script
IgnorANTs is Bliss
Keep squishing, guys! Remember, we are making grape juice purely as an educational exercise.
Yeah, we're learning that Principal Skidmore is too cheap to buy us juice.
I gotta say, this is really soothing my athlete's foot.
I wonder if it will work on my hemorrhoids.
No! No! Hey, guys, big news! I am holding an open house Thursday for prospective Ants and their parents.
I need somebody to give a speech about the A.
N.
T.
Program.
You mean explain how innocent 11-year-olds have been robbed of their youth by their principal, a power-hungry tyrant? You take that back or I will tear out your tongue and feed it to my raven! Chyna, you'll give the speech.
So get to work.
I'm counting on you.
I'll do whatever you want.
Please don't take my tongue.
Guys, stomp faster.
Like this! Ow! Ow! I can't Ow! Ow! Stop! Oh, stop! Wow.
You can really taste the foot.
Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Whoo! Everybody's got that thing Something different we all bring Don't you let 'em clip your wings You got it You got it We're on fire and we blaze In extraordinary ways 365 days We got it We got it You can dream it You can be it If you can feel it You can believe it 'Cause I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Yeah, I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh Whoo! Cameron, did you download a boxing app and punch my A.
N.
T.
Pad? How dare you something like that? You have no evidence.
None whatsoever.
Your knuckles are bandaged.
That's not from the screen.
I got this breaking out of a giant snow globe, where I was being evil gift shop owner.
If you were really trapped in a snow globe, you would be wet fake sparkles.
Little.
And I know, because it happened to Gibson.
Let me out of here! My speech was on here! You're going to pay for this! What are you going to do? No, I mean you're going to pay for this to be repaired.
Hey, Gibson, my dad's making me fix Chyna's A.
N.
T Pad.
I've got to find some way to get $250.
Ooh.
Well, I'd suggest entering the dog show, but it won't work.
The first prize isn't $250.
It's $300.
I've got an idea! I could find a dog, enter the dog show, win first prize, fix the A.
N.
T.
Pad, and throw the other $50 away.
Problem solved! Hey, Angus.
Check out this night-light I made for my bedroom.
Hey, Angus, remember when we were on that field trip to the zoo and you said you'd do anything for me if I never told anyone I caught you trying to eat a flamingo? I thought it was cotton candy.
Whatever.
It's payback time.
My A.
N.
T.
Pad is broken.
Can you retrieve my speech? Sure.
As long as you backed it up.
Ooh.
I didn't back it up! No one backs up! Don't worry, Chyna.
I proofread your speech and I remember every word of it, including that typo where instead of "poor," you wrote "poop.
" Oh, Olive, thank goodness! Because Skidmore's had this thing following me around all day.
Shoo! Go! Go! I'll help you with that little bird problem.
Finally, a chance to use my USB rotisserie.
Okay, Olive.
Go into the sound booth, recite my speech, and I'll record you.
Okay.
All righty.
No, Fletcher, don't plug that in near my amplifier! Oh, please.
Nothing's going to happen.
No! Well, nothing happened to us.
Olive? Are you okay? Can you hear anything? I can hear fine, but who are you? And who's Olive? Oh, no! This is terrible.
Hello, Terrible.
Nice to meet you.
The sound must have affected Olive's memory.
She doesn't remember who we are.
You remember me, right? I'm Angus, your boyfriend.
Perhaps this kiss will remind you.
No! So, what did the door say? Oh, he didn't say much, but I could see in his eyes he found me irresistible.
Yeah, I meant about Olive.
Oh, he said that the sound waves caused an inflammation in her hippocampus.
After I yelled at him for making up words, he explained to me that there's no physical damage, but he couldn't predict when, or if, her memory will return.
Grandma, can I have a candy? What if her memory doesn't come back? Well, then she'll no longer have a talent and she'll have to leave the A.
N.
T.
Program.
What? No! You can't do that! Olive may not have her memory, but she does have other talents.
Like Tap dancing.
I can tap dance? I guess I must've forgotten about that, too.
Wow, I am good! Guess I'll have to find a new memory freak at the prospective students night.
Oh! Which reminds me, Chyna, are you finished writing your speech? Oh, I'm finished.
Bye, leathery lunch lady! So, Olive, did they do any X-rays of your brain? And if so, did they see a copy of my speech in there? Olive, hurry up! They're coming! Who's Olive? Who's coming? Hey! Ow! Hey! Cut it out! Stop! Olive? Are you okay? Ow! Who wears golf shoes to school? Seriously! I can't keep this sign-up sign up, but this is where you sign up, so sign up.
Okay, but this is merely a formality, since Princess is the cutest wittle puppy ever.
Come on, Snuggles, let's sign up.
When did you get a dog? I got him from my dad.
He's a police dog.
Snuggles is a sweetheart as long as he doesn't hear the word A-T-T-A-C-K.
A-T-T Attack? No! Release, Snuggles! Release! Lexi, please don't say you know what again.
This isn't working.
Do either of you have a tack? No! All right.
Angus, put these on to protect your ears.
Why? Well, I figured if a loud sound made Olive lose her memory, another loud sound can bring it back.
What? Here comes Olive! What? You hear that? Yeah.
What the heck was that? I'm scared, Gordon.
Hold me.
All right.
Let's see if it worked.
Olive, what is the capital of North Dakota? Rhinoceros? Yes, she's back! Whatever that noise was made my raven go crazy.
It's out in the hall attacking the janitor.
The raven's all, "Caw! Caw!" And the janitor's all, "My eyes! My eyes!" Classic.
Good news, Principal Skidmore.
Olive got her memory back! Oh.
Well, let me check her out myself.
Olive? No, thanks, I just ate.
You're Olive.
Oh, yeah! Nice try.
I'm sorry, Olive, but you will have to leave high school.
Please, Principal Skidmore! Don't send Olive back to regular elementary school! I won't.
She's not ready for elementary school.
Olive, welcome to kindergarten.
Thanks, kindly bag lady! The itsy-bitsy spider Went up the water spout Down came the rain and washed the spider out Poor spider! He's dead.
I just know he's dead.
Out came the sun and dried up all the rain And the itsy-bitsy spider went up the spout again Oh, thank goodness.
Wow, this song really plays with your emotions.
Oh, Olive! I have missed you so much! Yeah.
Chyna's missed you so much! So, are you okay? How's it going? Sorry.
Miss Angie said I'm not supposed to talk to strangers.
You really don't remember me? I'm your best friend.
No, Isabelle's my best friend.
She gave me a sticker.
What is this supposed to be? Come on, Fletcher.
Let's go.
The Ant Farm will never be the same without her, but I guess this is where Olive belongs.
Oh! Don't cry, Joshie.
I remember exactly how it went.
Interesting factoid about the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
Prior to restoration completed in 2001, the tower leaned at an angle of 5.
5 degrees.
But it now leans at approximately 3.
99 degrees.
Seriously, Legan, my dad won't even let me in the house till I get the $250.
The dog show starts in 15 minutes and I don't have a dog! If that's not bad enough, my abdomen is still sore from all those rabies shots! Shut up, stupid cat.
Can't you see I'm on the phone? That's it! Legan, I've got to go get ready.
Welcome to the dog show! I love doing that.
I am your host, Gibson, along with my co-host, the reigning Golden Collar recipient, Gibdog.
You're right, Gibdog.
They're not here to see us.
They're here to see our wonderful contestants.
Excuse me.
I was here earlier.
I think I forgot something.
Actually, I meant my cell phone.
This is exactly the way you had it.
I remember because the pattern was red, red, yellow, blue, red, green red, blue, blue, yellow, green.
And I know this one was on top because you wiped your nose with it.
Olive, you have your memory back! Uh Who's Olive? Who are you? Stranger danger! Stranger danger! Wait a minute.
You've been faking! You never lost your memory! No, I did.
Just, when I got trampled in the hallway, my memory came back.
I just wanted to get out of high school.
Kindergarten is the life! I'm the big kid here.
Watch.
Joshie, raisins.
See? This place is awesome! So the whole time I was trying to keep my best friend around, she was trying just as hard to get away from me! No, I never wanted to get away from you, just the big kids.
Wait, I have an idea! What if you lose your memory? We can be in the same kindergarten class! This might hurt a bit.
Look, I'm out of here.
Oh.
And thanks for making me rewrite my speech for nothing! Oh, grow up, Joshie! You're almost five! Hmm.
A little overgrown, but I'm gonna give you some bonus points for being able to stand on your hind legs.
Now, head up, tail out.
Sassy walk.
Like this.
And who do we have here? This is my dog.
Snoop Dogg, the dog.
Did your dog just meow? Yes.
He does all kinds of impressions.
You should hear his Jack Nicholson.
What? No, don't be ridiculous, Gibdog.
That's not a cat.
This is a dog show.
Mmm.
Nice ears.
Soft, almost plush.
Come on! It says dry-clean only! Ooh-la-la! High-class dog.
This isn't a dog! This is a cat! Well, Snoop Dogg, it looks like you're the only contestant left.
You win the prize! Yes! That's my dog! Good boy! He is so calm.
So is yours.
He's the only other dog who didn't chase that cat.
That's because Gibdog is blind.
I'm his Seeing Eye man.
Okay, we're clear, Gibdog.
Chyna, I see you have your speech.
Before you start, I'd like to give you a last-minute pep talk.
Mess this up and you're raven food! This juice we made is actually pretty tasty.
Oh, and good news.
I didn't have athlete's foot.
Turns out, it's something called Albanian toe worms.
Oh, I'm gonna puke! My speech! Can I have your attention, everyone? I want to let one of the shining stars of the A.
N.
T.
Program come up and say a few words.
Ladies and gentlemen, Chyna Parks.
I can't go on! My speech is out of order! No, you're out of order! Sorry, I've always wanted to do that.
Chyna, now.
Welcome, parents, prospective Ants, faculty and low-flow toilets.
Wait.
And the A.
N.
T.
Program wouldn't be the same without the guidance of Principal Skidmore, who is asbestos-free, despite being over 100 years old.
What are you doing? If I wanted a terrible speech, I would have had Fletcher do it! Actually, Chyna wrote a great speech.
And I remember every word of it.
That's right! I was faking! Look, Dad! Look at what the raven's doing! Olive, if you remember the speech, then come up here and deliver it.
My old school's track record for dealing with gifted students was very, very poop.
And in conclusion, I just want to say that before I started the A.
N.
T.
Program, I wasn't sure I belonged in high school.
But to my surprise, the A.
N.
T.
Program has been one of the best things that ever happened to me.
Not only has it given me the opportunity to cultivate my musical talent, but, most importantly It's where I've met my best friend.
I feel the same way about you, Olive! I'm sorry, guys.
I never should have lied to you.
I'm just glad you're back.
Yeah, Chyna's just glad you're back.
Well, thanks for bailing me out.
And I want you to know I meant every word that I wrote.
And I meant every word that you wrote that I said.
So, do you want to hang out after school? I would, but I've got a play date with Joshie.
You can come, too, but I got to warn you, he's a sand thrower.
Joshie.
Yeah, you tell this Joshie to stay away from my woman! He's not big, is he? I hope tonight has been informative to all of you prospective Ants and parents.
We really do take care of our kids, and make sure they're in a calm, safe environment here at the Ant Farm.
Princess! Heel, Snoop Dogg! What is going on? You almost gave me a heart attack.
No! Release, Snuggles! Release!
Yeah, we're learning that Principal Skidmore is too cheap to buy us juice.
I gotta say, this is really soothing my athlete's foot.
I wonder if it will work on my hemorrhoids.
No! No! Hey, guys, big news! I am holding an open house Thursday for prospective Ants and their parents.
I need somebody to give a speech about the A.
N.
T.
Program.
You mean explain how innocent 11-year-olds have been robbed of their youth by their principal, a power-hungry tyrant? You take that back or I will tear out your tongue and feed it to my raven! Chyna, you'll give the speech.
So get to work.
I'm counting on you.
I'll do whatever you want.
Please don't take my tongue.
Guys, stomp faster.
Like this! Ow! Ow! I can't Ow! Ow! Stop! Oh, stop! Wow.
You can really taste the foot.
Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Whoo! Everybody's got that thing Something different we all bring Don't you let 'em clip your wings You got it You got it We're on fire and we blaze In extraordinary ways 365 days We got it We got it You can dream it You can be it If you can feel it You can believe it 'Cause I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Yeah, I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh Whoo! Cameron, did you download a boxing app and punch my A.
N.
T.
Pad? How dare you something like that? You have no evidence.
None whatsoever.
Your knuckles are bandaged.
That's not from the screen.
I got this breaking out of a giant snow globe, where I was being evil gift shop owner.
If you were really trapped in a snow globe, you would be wet fake sparkles.
Little.
And I know, because it happened to Gibson.
Let me out of here! My speech was on here! You're going to pay for this! What are you going to do? No, I mean you're going to pay for this to be repaired.
Hey, Gibson, my dad's making me fix Chyna's A.
N.
T Pad.
I've got to find some way to get $250.
Ooh.
Well, I'd suggest entering the dog show, but it won't work.
The first prize isn't $250.
It's $300.
I've got an idea! I could find a dog, enter the dog show, win first prize, fix the A.
N.
T.
Pad, and throw the other $50 away.
Problem solved! Hey, Angus.
Check out this night-light I made for my bedroom.
Hey, Angus, remember when we were on that field trip to the zoo and you said you'd do anything for me if I never told anyone I caught you trying to eat a flamingo? I thought it was cotton candy.
Whatever.
It's payback time.
My A.
N.
T.
Pad is broken.
Can you retrieve my speech? Sure.
As long as you backed it up.
Ooh.
I didn't back it up! No one backs up! Don't worry, Chyna.
I proofread your speech and I remember every word of it, including that typo where instead of "poor," you wrote "poop.
" Oh, Olive, thank goodness! Because Skidmore's had this thing following me around all day.
Shoo! Go! Go! I'll help you with that little bird problem.
Finally, a chance to use my USB rotisserie.
Okay, Olive.
Go into the sound booth, recite my speech, and I'll record you.
Okay.
All righty.
No, Fletcher, don't plug that in near my amplifier! Oh, please.
Nothing's going to happen.
No! Well, nothing happened to us.
Olive? Are you okay? Can you hear anything? I can hear fine, but who are you? And who's Olive? Oh, no! This is terrible.
Hello, Terrible.
Nice to meet you.
The sound must have affected Olive's memory.
She doesn't remember who we are.
You remember me, right? I'm Angus, your boyfriend.
Perhaps this kiss will remind you.
No! So, what did the door say? Oh, he didn't say much, but I could see in his eyes he found me irresistible.
Yeah, I meant about Olive.
Oh, he said that the sound waves caused an inflammation in her hippocampus.
After I yelled at him for making up words, he explained to me that there's no physical damage, but he couldn't predict when, or if, her memory will return.
Grandma, can I have a candy? What if her memory doesn't come back? Well, then she'll no longer have a talent and she'll have to leave the A.
N.
T.
Program.
What? No! You can't do that! Olive may not have her memory, but she does have other talents.
Like Tap dancing.
I can tap dance? I guess I must've forgotten about that, too.
Wow, I am good! Guess I'll have to find a new memory freak at the prospective students night.
Oh! Which reminds me, Chyna, are you finished writing your speech? Oh, I'm finished.
Bye, leathery lunch lady! So, Olive, did they do any X-rays of your brain? And if so, did they see a copy of my speech in there? Olive, hurry up! They're coming! Who's Olive? Who's coming? Hey! Ow! Hey! Cut it out! Stop! Olive? Are you okay? Ow! Who wears golf shoes to school? Seriously! I can't keep this sign-up sign up, but this is where you sign up, so sign up.
Okay, but this is merely a formality, since Princess is the cutest wittle puppy ever.
Come on, Snuggles, let's sign up.
When did you get a dog? I got him from my dad.
He's a police dog.
Snuggles is a sweetheart as long as he doesn't hear the word A-T-T-A-C-K.
A-T-T Attack? No! Release, Snuggles! Release! Lexi, please don't say you know what again.
This isn't working.
Do either of you have a tack? No! All right.
Angus, put these on to protect your ears.
Why? Well, I figured if a loud sound made Olive lose her memory, another loud sound can bring it back.
What? Here comes Olive! What? You hear that? Yeah.
What the heck was that? I'm scared, Gordon.
Hold me.
All right.
Let's see if it worked.
Olive, what is the capital of North Dakota? Rhinoceros? Yes, she's back! Whatever that noise was made my raven go crazy.
It's out in the hall attacking the janitor.
The raven's all, "Caw! Caw!" And the janitor's all, "My eyes! My eyes!" Classic.
Good news, Principal Skidmore.
Olive got her memory back! Oh.
Well, let me check her out myself.
Olive? No, thanks, I just ate.
You're Olive.
Oh, yeah! Nice try.
I'm sorry, Olive, but you will have to leave high school.
Please, Principal Skidmore! Don't send Olive back to regular elementary school! I won't.
She's not ready for elementary school.
Olive, welcome to kindergarten.
Thanks, kindly bag lady! The itsy-bitsy spider Went up the water spout Down came the rain and washed the spider out Poor spider! He's dead.
I just know he's dead.
Out came the sun and dried up all the rain And the itsy-bitsy spider went up the spout again Oh, thank goodness.
Wow, this song really plays with your emotions.
Oh, Olive! I have missed you so much! Yeah.
Chyna's missed you so much! So, are you okay? How's it going? Sorry.
Miss Angie said I'm not supposed to talk to strangers.
You really don't remember me? I'm your best friend.
No, Isabelle's my best friend.
She gave me a sticker.
What is this supposed to be? Come on, Fletcher.
Let's go.
The Ant Farm will never be the same without her, but I guess this is where Olive belongs.
Oh! Don't cry, Joshie.
I remember exactly how it went.
Interesting factoid about the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
Prior to restoration completed in 2001, the tower leaned at an angle of 5.
5 degrees.
But it now leans at approximately 3.
99 degrees.
Seriously, Legan, my dad won't even let me in the house till I get the $250.
The dog show starts in 15 minutes and I don't have a dog! If that's not bad enough, my abdomen is still sore from all those rabies shots! Shut up, stupid cat.
Can't you see I'm on the phone? That's it! Legan, I've got to go get ready.
Welcome to the dog show! I love doing that.
I am your host, Gibson, along with my co-host, the reigning Golden Collar recipient, Gibdog.
You're right, Gibdog.
They're not here to see us.
They're here to see our wonderful contestants.
Excuse me.
I was here earlier.
I think I forgot something.
Actually, I meant my cell phone.
This is exactly the way you had it.
I remember because the pattern was red, red, yellow, blue, red, green red, blue, blue, yellow, green.
And I know this one was on top because you wiped your nose with it.
Olive, you have your memory back! Uh Who's Olive? Who are you? Stranger danger! Stranger danger! Wait a minute.
You've been faking! You never lost your memory! No, I did.
Just, when I got trampled in the hallway, my memory came back.
I just wanted to get out of high school.
Kindergarten is the life! I'm the big kid here.
Watch.
Joshie, raisins.
See? This place is awesome! So the whole time I was trying to keep my best friend around, she was trying just as hard to get away from me! No, I never wanted to get away from you, just the big kids.
Wait, I have an idea! What if you lose your memory? We can be in the same kindergarten class! This might hurt a bit.
Look, I'm out of here.
Oh.
And thanks for making me rewrite my speech for nothing! Oh, grow up, Joshie! You're almost five! Hmm.
A little overgrown, but I'm gonna give you some bonus points for being able to stand on your hind legs.
Now, head up, tail out.
Sassy walk.
Like this.
And who do we have here? This is my dog.
Snoop Dogg, the dog.
Did your dog just meow? Yes.
He does all kinds of impressions.
You should hear his Jack Nicholson.
What? No, don't be ridiculous, Gibdog.
That's not a cat.
This is a dog show.
Mmm.
Nice ears.
Soft, almost plush.
Come on! It says dry-clean only! Ooh-la-la! High-class dog.
This isn't a dog! This is a cat! Well, Snoop Dogg, it looks like you're the only contestant left.
You win the prize! Yes! That's my dog! Good boy! He is so calm.
So is yours.
He's the only other dog who didn't chase that cat.
That's because Gibdog is blind.
I'm his Seeing Eye man.
Okay, we're clear, Gibdog.
Chyna, I see you have your speech.
Before you start, I'd like to give you a last-minute pep talk.
Mess this up and you're raven food! This juice we made is actually pretty tasty.
Oh, and good news.
I didn't have athlete's foot.
Turns out, it's something called Albanian toe worms.
Oh, I'm gonna puke! My speech! Can I have your attention, everyone? I want to let one of the shining stars of the A.
N.
T.
Program come up and say a few words.
Ladies and gentlemen, Chyna Parks.
I can't go on! My speech is out of order! No, you're out of order! Sorry, I've always wanted to do that.
Chyna, now.
Welcome, parents, prospective Ants, faculty and low-flow toilets.
Wait.
And the A.
N.
T.
Program wouldn't be the same without the guidance of Principal Skidmore, who is asbestos-free, despite being over 100 years old.
What are you doing? If I wanted a terrible speech, I would have had Fletcher do it! Actually, Chyna wrote a great speech.
And I remember every word of it.
That's right! I was faking! Look, Dad! Look at what the raven's doing! Olive, if you remember the speech, then come up here and deliver it.
My old school's track record for dealing with gifted students was very, very poop.
And in conclusion, I just want to say that before I started the A.
N.
T.
Program, I wasn't sure I belonged in high school.
But to my surprise, the A.
N.
T.
Program has been one of the best things that ever happened to me.
Not only has it given me the opportunity to cultivate my musical talent, but, most importantly It's where I've met my best friend.
I feel the same way about you, Olive! I'm sorry, guys.
I never should have lied to you.
I'm just glad you're back.
Yeah, Chyna's just glad you're back.
Well, thanks for bailing me out.
And I want you to know I meant every word that I wrote.
And I meant every word that you wrote that I said.
So, do you want to hang out after school? I would, but I've got a play date with Joshie.
You can come, too, but I got to warn you, he's a sand thrower.
Joshie.
Yeah, you tell this Joshie to stay away from my woman! He's not big, is he? I hope tonight has been informative to all of you prospective Ants and parents.
We really do take care of our kids, and make sure they're in a calm, safe environment here at the Ant Farm.
Princess! Heel, Snoop Dogg! What is going on? You almost gave me a heart attack.
No! Release, Snuggles! Release!