Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s01e19 Episode Script

The Duke

[mouse squeaks.]
[penguins chirp.]
[all cheering.]
[screeches.]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands with Jake the dog and Finn the human the fun will never end lt's Adventure Time JAKE: Ha! [glass shatters.]
[laughter.]
Here.
Try throwing this one.
Ugh! [growls.]
Here's one called ''Caturday Surprise.
'' Throw it! Ugh! [cats meowing.]
[laughter.]
PRlNCESS BUBBLEGUM: Yeah, go on! Get out of here! Unless you feel like a fist cookie, you better keep running! What the heck is going on? l have no idea, but it's probably best to stay out of it.
Yeah.
Hey, look.
This one looks stupid.
Let's see how it flies.
Ugh! Aw, lame.
Huh? [glass shatters.]
Uh-oh.
PRlNCESS BUBBLEGUM: Duke of Nuts!! What have you done?! Ohh.
Oh, no.
She thinks that nuts guy did it.
We got to go clear up what happened.
Don't worry, my dear.
l'll have you fixed up in no time.
Princess? Are you okay? Yeah, l guess if green and bald is okay.
[gasps.]
[laughing.]
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo, boy.
l'm sorry.
l can't stop now.
My dear, not to worry.
The medicine milk in this suit will have you healed lickety-split.
ln just five days, you'll be back to your beautiful Bubblegummy self.
Five days?! The grand meeting of Ooo Royalty is tonight!! [pop!.]
Ohh.
[plop!.]
Uh, hey, Princess.
There's something l should tell you about that bottle that hit you in the face.
l already know, Finn.
The Duke of Nuts has always been a bad guy.
But now that he's done this, l'll never forgive him! And it's not just because l hate the Duke.
l'd never forgive anybody who did thls to me.
l'd hate them Yeah, but -- BUBBLEGUM: forever! Forever?! Finally, l have a witness to his misdeeds! Two witnesses.
Jake! Oh, Finn, my flawless, flawless champion.
Bring the Duke of Nuts to justice -- The justice of a cold dungeon! [laughs evilly.]
[pop! pop!.]
[laughs maniacally.]
[both chuckle.]
She's completely bonkers.
What do l do? lf l tell her l threw it, she'll hate me forever.
Don't worry.
That won't happen.
We're gonna catch that Duke.
But we're the ones who threw the bottle.
Dude, look.
The Duke of Nuts is bad guys.
How do you know that? Think about it.
lf Bubblegum hates him so much, then he must have done some rotten stuff.
l mean, maybe he even threw a bottle and turned someone ugly before.
Maybe you're right.
Maybe l am.
All right, then.
Just this once, we'll be vigilantes! Nah, we're more like cops -- crooked cops.
[imitates gun cocking, bullets firing.]
Princess, l won't rest until the villainous Duke is captured! Oh, thank you, Finn.
[laughs maniacally.]
Whoa, okay, and by then, hopefully you'll have taken care ofthis.
Look yonder! The Duke of Nuts' castle.
Duke of Nuts! How are you? By order of Princess -- um Princess [gasps.]
Hello, Finn.
Are you here to arrest the Duke? How did you know? The Nuts told me.
For l am the Duchess of Nuts.
[gulping.]
Oh, should have asked if these were like her eggs or something.
l know of my husband's crime against the Princess -- a crime that you personally witnessed! And why would you lie, huh? Yeah.
Why? Oh, but he was once such a wonderful man.
He pet dogs, kissed babies.
We'd lie together underneath the cashew bush.
He even taught underprivileged nuts how to dance.
But somehow he's gone rancid! These nuts tell me he must be executed.
Would you like to hear what my nuts have to say?! That won't be, um, necessary.
Listen! Listen! Whoa! l don't get it, Jake.
How can the dude be evil if he pets puppies, kisses babies, and lies with his wife? What?! You believe that? She is nuts.
Listen, man.
Let's just go back and face the music.
Who cares if Bubblegum hates you forever? lt's no biggy.
Tons of people hate me.
Why, Jake? Why won't you print my letters? l-l-l hate you!! Hmm.
[gasps.]
lt's him -- the Duke of Nuts! [both breathing heavily.]
l'll break left! You take the right! Ugh! l went left, too! Ooh! Wha? You're way smaller than l thought you were.
Dude, that's not him.
No one will harm the Duke of Nuts.
l will kill whoever seeks to arrest him.
No! Please! This has gone far enough.
That's the Duke of Nuts.
But l vowed to kill whoever did this to you.
They can't take you away, Dad.
[crying.]
Who's the toughest little nut? That's you.
[sobs.]
One second.
[crying.]
Man, l don't know, Jake.
Why would Princess Bubblegum hate him if he was such a nice guy? Just because he's a good father doesn't necessarily mean he isn't a villain.
That doesn't look like a villain.
l could probably think of a reason why that's villainous if you gave me enough time.
Maybe.
- Ugh! Maybe we should just confess.
But then Princess Bubblegum will hate us forever.
Hey, man.
lt's not that bad being hated.
Come on! Pick it up! You son of a blee blob! Oh.
Sorry to make you wait.
l made these daisy crowns for you guys as a -- as a token of my gratitude for waiting.
Ohh, sorry, l -- l have to sit down for a second.
Oh.
l know this is an odd question, but you wouldn't happen to have any pudding on you, would you? Actually, yeah, l think l have one in my pack.
Oh.
Oh, thank goodness.
l think l have a spoon in here, too.
What -- What happened to the cup? Oh, l'm so embarrassed.
Now you know my shame.
l can't stop eating pudding.
What?! l don't tell people because l hate making them worry, but, yes, l have a rare condition, a pudding deficiency.
[sighs.]
And l always end up eating all the royal pudding supply whenever l go to the castle.
So that's why Princess Bubblegum hates you.
Yes, but l didn't turn Princess Bubblegum green and bald.
l would never do such a thing.
Ugh! Of course you wouldn't.
You're too nice a guy.
l'm the one who threw that bottle.
l was gonna tell her, but then she started talking all crazy.
She said she'd never forgive me, and l didn't know.
Hey, it's okay.
People make mistakes.
lt's all part of growing up.
And you never really stop growing.
Now you're making me feel even worse by being so nice about it.
Maybe l should just confess the crime and end all this.
Wait.
l think l might have an idea that will save everyone's reputations.
Halt! Finn! Did you find the Duke yet? Not yet.
But you are in grave danger, Princess.
There is an assassin in these very woods dead set on stopping you from reaching the grand meeting.
ln fact, it's that rustling in the bush.
Rustle, rustle, rustle.
JAKE: l'm an ambush! Halt! What's going on?! Oh, did l come out too early? [clears throat.]
What are you here to do, stranger? l've come for the Princess! l'm an assassin! Um, guys Stand back! l will stop him! Hyah! Hyah! Phew! l'll kill you and raise your children as my own! [slow motion.]
Hyah! [slow motion.]
H-a-a! Unh! Ugh! Remember, it's just acting, Jake.
Sorry, dude.
Ooh! Now, to kill you up! But wait! Surely this cannot be the fair Princess Bubblegum.
Where are her pink, flush cheeks? The long, gooey hair? - Ugh! Oof! Clearly the princess travels elsewhere.
Later, Bubblegum! Get out there, man! l don't know if l can do this.
Go, go, go, go! And that's how l, the Duke of Nuts, by disfiguring you beyond all recognition, humbly saved your life.
Yeah! All right! Yeah! What was the point of this little play again? [gasps.]
And why isn't the Duke clapped in irons? She's right.
lnnocent or not, l should accept what's coming to me.
Peppermint Butler.
Oh, no.
''Nut'n's'' going my way today.
Hup! Hup! Hup! - No! Finn? The Duke didn't throw that bottle.
Ugh.
Princess, l have something sucky to confess.
l'm the one who threw the bottle.
[gasps.]
l'm sorry.
But l knew if l told you, you'd hate me forever.
Hmm.
Well l could never stay mad at you forever.
And you seem genuinely penitent.
l don't even know what that means, but thank you.
[both laugh.]
Yeah! [laughs.]
But that doesn't douse my hatred for the Duke! Yeah, what's up with that hate? That jerk always empties out my pudding pantry! Aw, shucks.
He just can't control himself around pudding.
He goes coconuts for it because he has a pudding deficiency.
lt's true, your majesty.
l -- l'm sorry for my medical condition.
Oh, my.
You poor man.
Of course you're forgiven.
Yeah, l don't believe a word from him.
[sighs.]
l'm really sorry about making you temporarily ugly, Princess, especially before the Grand Meeting of Ooo Royalty.
l wish there was some way to make it up to you.
Maybe there is, Finn.
Maybe there is.
[whistling.]
Hey! Hmm? What? You said ''Maybe.
'' Call to order the sesquicentennial grand meeting of Ooo Royalty.
l now call upon the delegate from the Candy Kingdom.
Princess Bubblegums? [clears throat.]
''lt would be be presumptuous indeed to present myself against the distinguished Princess to whom you have listened.
'' [yawns.]
Buy a lady a drink? [all gasp.]
The Marquis of Nuts?! Yes! But l didn't come alone! Remember me, Jake?! No.
- [growls.]
- [screams.]
[both scream.]
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree
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