Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s01e20 Episode Script
Freak City
[mouse squeaks.]
[penguins chirp.]
[all cheering.]
[screeches.]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands with Jake the dog and Finn the human the fun will never end lt's Adventure Time [birds chirping.]
Walking, walking, walking -- hambone break! Whoo-hoo! Hey, hey, get away from me.
[laughing.]
Quit it! [laughs.]
Food for a beggar? [coughs.]
Food for a poor old man? Geez Louise, guy.
So, you got any, kid? Food? l got this little piece of sugar.
[thinking.]
Nuts.
l'm frickin' all about sugar.
But l'm even more all about feeding hobos! JAKE: Wait, Finn.
Maybe helping this starving homeless guy is the wrong thing to do.
Why? l don't know.
l-l said ''Maybe.
'' A hero always helps someone in need.
And besides, he's probably secretly an elf who will reward us for being nice.
Here you go, buddy.
Whoa! [chewing.]
You know, believe it or not, l'm not really a beggar.
l'm actually a Magic Man Whoa! Ah, yeah! He's -- he's magic! l didn't -- l didn't expect this.
[whistling.]
[bird chirping.]
Magic! Away! [flapping, squishing.]
Think happy thoughts -- Little, cute bees, little babies, tiny, tiny bunnies.
What is wrong with you, Magic Man?! You gave me that candy.
Now l'll do you a favor in return -- a magic favor! A mystical, magical favor Whoa! Wha-- ugh! [screams.]
Whoa, dude! For you Why'd you do that?! Because this day, a magical life lesson comes to you.
No, change me back! Not until you appreciate what a jerk l am.
Wazoo! What a nutty guy.
What the heck, man?! What kind of deal is that?! l help somebody out, and they make me a stinky foot?! [sniffs.]
You smell pretty good.
Get off of me, man! l can't be a hero if l'm a big, good-smelling foot! Maybe you're looking at this magic gift all wrong.
Now that you're a huge foot, you can kick evil's butt, like, way more times as hard.
You're 1 00% kick, man! Why are you being so level-headed about this? Don't be a siss, Finn.
Here, come on, kick my butt.
You're the siss, siss! Hah! Agh! Ouch! Ooh, ouch! See, man? Let's give your foot body a shot.
No, dude! l want to go find that Magic Man and get my body back! Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh! Just be a foot for a llttle bit.
[as Finn.]
Okay, l will.
[as himself.]
Awesome, dude.
You'll never regret this.
[laughs.]
Okay, when the next monster comes along, he'll step on that trigger over there, sending your giant foot body into the monster's crotch! This sucks, dude.
Shh! [roaring.]
We're evil! [roars.]
[both shout.]
Our crotch -- our evil crotch! [laughs.]
What'd l tell you? You're a great hero! Let's go set up some more crotch catapults so we can laugh and be heroes.
No, Jake.
Let's find that Magic Man.
Finn, being an enormous crotch-kicking foot is a gift.
Don't scorn a gift.
[indistinct shouting.]
Town on fire! This looks like a job for foot Finn stomping ability! But l-l can't even bend these big, fat toes, man.
You can do it, Finn.
What'd l teach you, dude? Not to scorn the kicking of people in the crotch? You got it! Now l'm gonna go rescue all the babies in town -- only the babies.
Get your hero on, dude! Aaaah! [indistinct shouting.]
Unh! Okay, you can do this, Finn.
Start small, man.
l'm taking you down! [grunting.]
lt's hot! Oh, man, l'm smoking hot! Please, help me out! l can't move! lt's another one of those freaks! He probably started this fire! No, l didn't start any -- Throw him under the bridge with the others! ALL: Get rid of the freak! [chanting.]
Freak! Freak! Stay out of our town, freak! Unh! [sighs.]
[sniffles.]
l'm not a freak.
l'm a hero.
Finn! Jake, how'd you find me? Oh, l can sense when you're about to cry.
lt's like a mother/daughter thing.
l'm not gonna cry, man! l just feel like crying.
We have to find that magic guy and get my body back now! What we have to do is find out what reeks under this bridge.
[sniffs.]
- Jake! Ew, it's blocking out your good foot smell.
Get back here! Ugh, it -- it smells like vomit on fire.
lt's like fancy cheese in an old guy's mouth.
Welcome, travelers.
Aah! l am Gork, leader of Freak City.
Ah, l can see one of you has felt the Magic Man's touch.
Yeah.
You know that guy? l will tell you all that l know.
[vomits.]
We are the accursed ones, all once normal guys and gals who crossed paths with the Magic Man.
That's Zap, The Arm.
[mumbles.]
Trudy, The Waist.
[coughs.]
That's Wee Wee and Gorflax.
They were turned into tonsils.
And that's Kim.
[chuckles.]
[smooching.]
But, please, make yourselves at home.
Would you like something to drink? Do you have any orange juice? No.
Well, uh, l don't know.
Maybe.
Uh, l don't think so.
l'll go check.
Yo, finn, this place is really bumming me out.
Let's get out of here.
What?! No, dude.
These guys might be my only hope of finding the Magic Man.
Hey, we actually do have orange juice.
Thanks for being cool and all, but what do you know about this Magic Man? How do we catch him? Oh, he can't be caught.
He's got maglc.
And we're worthless freaks.
We can't ever beat him.
So we've gathered here to wallow in our self-pity.
But don't y'all even want to try? Eh, no.
Why not? You're all totally miserable here.
Eh, it's a living.
No, it's not, Zap! lt's not a living! lt's dookie diapers! l don't want to be a foot! Well, get used to it.
We did.
Yeah, Finn, maybe there's another lesson to be learned here -- to accept what fate has given you and stay a miserable foot.
Gork, can we live here in this pile of trash and rats forever? Yeah, man.
Do it up.
Awesome.
[rats squeaking.]
Here we go.
Jake, stop screwing around.
You're gonna make me give into depression.
Eh, what are you gonna do about it? Probably nothing, right? lf you're depressed, you'll do nothing.
l Maybe l will do nothing.
Maybe l'll just lay down here.
[grunts.]
[sighs.]
Lay down -- unh -- and rot like the rest of you.
Yeah! [chanting.]
Stay a foot! Stay a foot! Stay a foot! ls this really my life? ls this how my story ends? Being in this body seems like a battle that l cannot win Maybe l should lay my head down slow And sleep until it's all over ls this the end Of the hero boy named Finn? Heck no! Darn heck no! This isn't how l go l'm gonna kill it l'm gonna kick life's butt And win it To win it l'm gonna take life's name [spits.]
And spit on it And kick it Life can just go eat it 'Cause this is a man's game Get up, Gork! Huh? Why? l'm not gonna let you lie here And waste away You better get up, Gork, or l'll kick you up Today's the day Whoa, okay, man.
Just be cool.
And l'm not gonna be cool 'Cause l'm pipin' hot Ow! Get up, Trudy Get up, Kim l'm not gonna let you rot [rats squeaking.]
Hey, Finn.
Jake Stop telling me to enjoy Being a foot And get out of that trash [chuckles.]
l can't take you seriously when you're singing, man.
Get up - Aah! All of you make me sick l'll fix you with my kicks Gonna reconstruct y'all's self-worth Brick by emotional brick [all grunting.]
[grunting.]
Wait, Finn.
Hey, stop it, man! We don't like touching each other.
Huh? Please, man.
Wait a second.
Kim, get underneath Trudy.
No, man.
Please.
l frickin' hate Trudy.
Kim, l will destroy you! Okay, okay! [chuckles.]
Yeah, do it, Kim.
[stammers.]
Yes! Now for me.
[grunts.]
Look at us! Whoa! We're like a big, normal guy.
Thank you so much.
We're perfect together.
Oh, Finn, thank you.
Word! Now let's go wreck up that Magic Man! [indistinct shouting.]
Let me get in on this.
l'll form the pants.
MAGlC MAN: Food.
Food for a beggar.
[gasps.]
Y'all got any food? We've got a little orange juice left over from -- Wait a second.
That's right.
lt is l, the Magic Man! Zap! [all shout.]
Come on, apple grease! What are you gonna do? Ohh! We're not afraid! Are you sure about that? You're darn right we are! [vomits.]
Whoop! Give us our bodies back! [shouts.]
Why should l? You still act like a hero only so you can get what you want.
Oh.
You were trying to teach us to be kind without expecting anything in return.
l should've given you that sugar cube without even thinking about a reward.
Wrong! Whoa! Whoa! - Ah, geez! - Finn! You've gifted us nothing but heartache, Magic Man! What's the life lesson in that?! [laughs maniacally.]
Yes, my children, you are so close to the answer.
Answer thls! Get his eyes! Cut him in the eyes! l wish l'd never been nice to you 'cause you're just a big jerk! Oh, yes, that's it! You've finally learned your lesson.
And now l'm off to spread my teachings to more sissy do-gooders.
You're welcome! Man, l frickin' hate that guy.
But at least now we can all go back to our regular lives.
Well, actually We like being like this.
Yeah, we're strong together.
ALL: Bye, Finn! Thank you! Oh, okay.
Bye, guys.
See you later.
Wait, so, what was the lesson we just learned? Maybe it was, don't give your sugar to jerks.
Speaking of jerks, what the blubins, man?! Why wouldn't you help me turn back into a boy?! Well, because l kind of always wanted [mumbles.]
What? l said, ''l kind of always wanted to be a foot myself.
'' You could be a foot right now.
l saw you change into a foot twice yesterday.
lt's complicated, man.
You'll understand when you're older.
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree
[penguins chirp.]
[all cheering.]
[screeches.]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands with Jake the dog and Finn the human the fun will never end lt's Adventure Time [birds chirping.]
Walking, walking, walking -- hambone break! Whoo-hoo! Hey, hey, get away from me.
[laughing.]
Quit it! [laughs.]
Food for a beggar? [coughs.]
Food for a poor old man? Geez Louise, guy.
So, you got any, kid? Food? l got this little piece of sugar.
[thinking.]
Nuts.
l'm frickin' all about sugar.
But l'm even more all about feeding hobos! JAKE: Wait, Finn.
Maybe helping this starving homeless guy is the wrong thing to do.
Why? l don't know.
l-l said ''Maybe.
'' A hero always helps someone in need.
And besides, he's probably secretly an elf who will reward us for being nice.
Here you go, buddy.
Whoa! [chewing.]
You know, believe it or not, l'm not really a beggar.
l'm actually a Magic Man Whoa! Ah, yeah! He's -- he's magic! l didn't -- l didn't expect this.
[whistling.]
[bird chirping.]
Magic! Away! [flapping, squishing.]
Think happy thoughts -- Little, cute bees, little babies, tiny, tiny bunnies.
What is wrong with you, Magic Man?! You gave me that candy.
Now l'll do you a favor in return -- a magic favor! A mystical, magical favor Whoa! Wha-- ugh! [screams.]
Whoa, dude! For you Why'd you do that?! Because this day, a magical life lesson comes to you.
No, change me back! Not until you appreciate what a jerk l am.
Wazoo! What a nutty guy.
What the heck, man?! What kind of deal is that?! l help somebody out, and they make me a stinky foot?! [sniffs.]
You smell pretty good.
Get off of me, man! l can't be a hero if l'm a big, good-smelling foot! Maybe you're looking at this magic gift all wrong.
Now that you're a huge foot, you can kick evil's butt, like, way more times as hard.
You're 1 00% kick, man! Why are you being so level-headed about this? Don't be a siss, Finn.
Here, come on, kick my butt.
You're the siss, siss! Hah! Agh! Ouch! Ooh, ouch! See, man? Let's give your foot body a shot.
No, dude! l want to go find that Magic Man and get my body back! Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh! Just be a foot for a llttle bit.
[as Finn.]
Okay, l will.
[as himself.]
Awesome, dude.
You'll never regret this.
[laughs.]
Okay, when the next monster comes along, he'll step on that trigger over there, sending your giant foot body into the monster's crotch! This sucks, dude.
Shh! [roaring.]
We're evil! [roars.]
[both shout.]
Our crotch -- our evil crotch! [laughs.]
What'd l tell you? You're a great hero! Let's go set up some more crotch catapults so we can laugh and be heroes.
No, Jake.
Let's find that Magic Man.
Finn, being an enormous crotch-kicking foot is a gift.
Don't scorn a gift.
[indistinct shouting.]
Town on fire! This looks like a job for foot Finn stomping ability! But l-l can't even bend these big, fat toes, man.
You can do it, Finn.
What'd l teach you, dude? Not to scorn the kicking of people in the crotch? You got it! Now l'm gonna go rescue all the babies in town -- only the babies.
Get your hero on, dude! Aaaah! [indistinct shouting.]
Unh! Okay, you can do this, Finn.
Start small, man.
l'm taking you down! [grunting.]
lt's hot! Oh, man, l'm smoking hot! Please, help me out! l can't move! lt's another one of those freaks! He probably started this fire! No, l didn't start any -- Throw him under the bridge with the others! ALL: Get rid of the freak! [chanting.]
Freak! Freak! Stay out of our town, freak! Unh! [sighs.]
[sniffles.]
l'm not a freak.
l'm a hero.
Finn! Jake, how'd you find me? Oh, l can sense when you're about to cry.
lt's like a mother/daughter thing.
l'm not gonna cry, man! l just feel like crying.
We have to find that magic guy and get my body back now! What we have to do is find out what reeks under this bridge.
[sniffs.]
- Jake! Ew, it's blocking out your good foot smell.
Get back here! Ugh, it -- it smells like vomit on fire.
lt's like fancy cheese in an old guy's mouth.
Welcome, travelers.
Aah! l am Gork, leader of Freak City.
Ah, l can see one of you has felt the Magic Man's touch.
Yeah.
You know that guy? l will tell you all that l know.
[vomits.]
We are the accursed ones, all once normal guys and gals who crossed paths with the Magic Man.
That's Zap, The Arm.
[mumbles.]
Trudy, The Waist.
[coughs.]
That's Wee Wee and Gorflax.
They were turned into tonsils.
And that's Kim.
[chuckles.]
[smooching.]
But, please, make yourselves at home.
Would you like something to drink? Do you have any orange juice? No.
Well, uh, l don't know.
Maybe.
Uh, l don't think so.
l'll go check.
Yo, finn, this place is really bumming me out.
Let's get out of here.
What?! No, dude.
These guys might be my only hope of finding the Magic Man.
Hey, we actually do have orange juice.
Thanks for being cool and all, but what do you know about this Magic Man? How do we catch him? Oh, he can't be caught.
He's got maglc.
And we're worthless freaks.
We can't ever beat him.
So we've gathered here to wallow in our self-pity.
But don't y'all even want to try? Eh, no.
Why not? You're all totally miserable here.
Eh, it's a living.
No, it's not, Zap! lt's not a living! lt's dookie diapers! l don't want to be a foot! Well, get used to it.
We did.
Yeah, Finn, maybe there's another lesson to be learned here -- to accept what fate has given you and stay a miserable foot.
Gork, can we live here in this pile of trash and rats forever? Yeah, man.
Do it up.
Awesome.
[rats squeaking.]
Here we go.
Jake, stop screwing around.
You're gonna make me give into depression.
Eh, what are you gonna do about it? Probably nothing, right? lf you're depressed, you'll do nothing.
l Maybe l will do nothing.
Maybe l'll just lay down here.
[grunts.]
[sighs.]
Lay down -- unh -- and rot like the rest of you.
Yeah! [chanting.]
Stay a foot! Stay a foot! Stay a foot! ls this really my life? ls this how my story ends? Being in this body seems like a battle that l cannot win Maybe l should lay my head down slow And sleep until it's all over ls this the end Of the hero boy named Finn? Heck no! Darn heck no! This isn't how l go l'm gonna kill it l'm gonna kick life's butt And win it To win it l'm gonna take life's name [spits.]
And spit on it And kick it Life can just go eat it 'Cause this is a man's game Get up, Gork! Huh? Why? l'm not gonna let you lie here And waste away You better get up, Gork, or l'll kick you up Today's the day Whoa, okay, man.
Just be cool.
And l'm not gonna be cool 'Cause l'm pipin' hot Ow! Get up, Trudy Get up, Kim l'm not gonna let you rot [rats squeaking.]
Hey, Finn.
Jake Stop telling me to enjoy Being a foot And get out of that trash [chuckles.]
l can't take you seriously when you're singing, man.
Get up - Aah! All of you make me sick l'll fix you with my kicks Gonna reconstruct y'all's self-worth Brick by emotional brick [all grunting.]
[grunting.]
Wait, Finn.
Hey, stop it, man! We don't like touching each other.
Huh? Please, man.
Wait a second.
Kim, get underneath Trudy.
No, man.
Please.
l frickin' hate Trudy.
Kim, l will destroy you! Okay, okay! [chuckles.]
Yeah, do it, Kim.
[stammers.]
Yes! Now for me.
[grunts.]
Look at us! Whoa! We're like a big, normal guy.
Thank you so much.
We're perfect together.
Oh, Finn, thank you.
Word! Now let's go wreck up that Magic Man! [indistinct shouting.]
Let me get in on this.
l'll form the pants.
MAGlC MAN: Food.
Food for a beggar.
[gasps.]
Y'all got any food? We've got a little orange juice left over from -- Wait a second.
That's right.
lt is l, the Magic Man! Zap! [all shout.]
Come on, apple grease! What are you gonna do? Ohh! We're not afraid! Are you sure about that? You're darn right we are! [vomits.]
Whoop! Give us our bodies back! [shouts.]
Why should l? You still act like a hero only so you can get what you want.
Oh.
You were trying to teach us to be kind without expecting anything in return.
l should've given you that sugar cube without even thinking about a reward.
Wrong! Whoa! Whoa! - Ah, geez! - Finn! You've gifted us nothing but heartache, Magic Man! What's the life lesson in that?! [laughs maniacally.]
Yes, my children, you are so close to the answer.
Answer thls! Get his eyes! Cut him in the eyes! l wish l'd never been nice to you 'cause you're just a big jerk! Oh, yes, that's it! You've finally learned your lesson.
And now l'm off to spread my teachings to more sissy do-gooders.
You're welcome! Man, l frickin' hate that guy.
But at least now we can all go back to our regular lives.
Well, actually We like being like this.
Yeah, we're strong together.
ALL: Bye, Finn! Thank you! Oh, okay.
Bye, guys.
See you later.
Wait, so, what was the lesson we just learned? Maybe it was, don't give your sugar to jerks.
Speaking of jerks, what the blubins, man?! Why wouldn't you help me turn back into a boy?! Well, because l kind of always wanted [mumbles.]
What? l said, ''l kind of always wanted to be a foot myself.
'' You could be a foot right now.
l saw you change into a foot twice yesterday.
lt's complicated, man.
You'll understand when you're older.
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree