Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s02e05 Episode Script
Story Tellin'
[MOUSE SQUEAKS.]
[PENGUINS CHIRP.]
[ALL CHEERING.]
[SCREECHES.]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the dog and Finn the human The fun will never end It's Adventure Time JAKE: [GROANING.]
Blankie me.
Blankie me, Finn.
I'll get your blanket, dude.
Where is it? Right here.
Why don't you just get it yourself? Because I'm sick! Poor guy.
[GROANS.]
Too hot! Oh, man, Jake.
Is there anything I can do to make you feel better? Soup me, Finny.
Soup-flavored cure coming on through.
[SNIFFS.]
[CREAKY.]
[GULP!.]
Do you feel better now? Yes.
Bleagh! Tell me a story.
- Once upon a time -- - No! I already heard that story before! But you've already heard all my stories before.
Make me a new one, Finn -- A new story.
Okay.
Got it! Once upon a time -- - No! What's the matter? I don't want a made-up story.
I need a real story! Hmm.
Now, you hang on, my friend.
I'll be right back.
Okay, world, give me a story for Jake! [GASPS.]
[LAUGHS.]
[WHIMPERING.]
FINN: Jake! Jake! Check it out.
This true story is going to totally cure you.
Oh, my gosh.
What is it'? First, the leaf fell off a tree.
Oh, but, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Spit it out! The snail was on the leaf! The end.
Oh, no.
Now I feel a thousand times worse.
Finn, a story's got to have excitement, romance, suspens-s-s-e, and it has to have a happy ending.
[SNIFFLES.]
ButI don't know how to make that stuff happen.
That's okay, buddy.
Just dig me a hole, then.
Actually, two holes -- one for my guts and one for my face, 'cause when I die, my guts are gonna blow out of my face! I am not gonna let that happen, dude! Then go get me that story.
And make sure it has all the stuff on this list.
I'll be back as fast as I can! I won't let your guts blow out of your face! Hmm.
"Romance" -- that should be easy.
Hey, how about you two'? Are y'all in love? La ba gi na goo da di dah.
Uh [ANGRILY.]
La nah gee ga rah la na! Um [SNORING.]
Are y'all kissing in there?! BOTH: Eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek! [THUD!.]
Hmm.
Maybe I should smo-o-o-ove out my approach a bit.
Normal guy, forest guy Just like normal forest guy Whoa! Hey, so, uhyeah.
So, yeah, can I, um Could I watch you guys kissing? What?! Ugh! I just need to f-for my friend.
He's really sick, and unless I tell him about watching you guys kissing and may-- Uck! What a weirdo! You are one sick man, mister! Yeah.
What's this "friend's" name, huh? Jake! His name's Jake! Pff! Yeah, right! Sounds pretty fake.
Come on, Boobafina.
Let's get out of here.
Yeah.
Wait! I'll do anything! Would you eat dirt? I would for Jake.
[MUNCH! MUNCH! GAG! MUNCH!.]
[GULP!.]
Okay, HOW you guys kiss! Man, what a freak.
Let's go.
What?! No! Jake needs this! Stop! [HONKING, GROWLING, GRUNTING.]
Justcomeon! What?! No! Gah! Wait! [ALL GRUNTING.]
[SMOOCH!.]
Aaah! [PANTING.]
You see? No big deal! Pyah! Poo! Poo! [COUGHING.]
[CRYING.]
I can't believe you made me do that! I'm secretly in love with Mr.
Goose! And now he'll never love me because now I'm soiled! [SOBBING.]
Oh, no! Oh, no! I really did want to kiss Boobafina.
I'm secretly in love with her.
Okay.
Sweet.
No, no.
It had to happen naturally.
Now she'll never love me.
[SOBBING.]
[SIGHS.]
That's wasn't smoove.
But it's all worth it to save Jake -- whatever it takes! Okay.
A good fight.
[CAN CLACKS, SPRAYS.]
Hey.
You want to fight me? Oh, heck, yeah! I've been waiting for this my whole life! Yes! Ha ha ha! WOMAN: Oh, no, you don't! [SMACK!.]
You never let me do anything! [GROWLS.]
Ugh! Rawr! Ufigh! You killed him! Mom, quit touching me.
You killed him, and now he's dead! He's probably not dead! I'm sorry, though, that you think he's dead! Mm.
I don't want to hurt aminals, but -- but Jake! [SIGHS.]
Okay.
Okay, what's next? [BIRDS PEEPING.]
Oh! [GASPS.]
"Suspens-s-s-e"! Hey.
Hey, you guys.
[EVILLY.]
You want to die? ALL: Aaah! [ALL GRUNT.]
Boys! Boys? Have you seen my boys? [WHIMPERING.]
No! Aah! I can't do it! I-I can't keep messing with folks.
Aaaaaaah! But Jake needs me! But I-l can't keep messing with folks! But Jake's really sick! But I can't! But -- but -- but -- but -- aah! [SIGHS.]
[THUNK!.]
Ow! Hey! Who threw -- aaaah! Tie him up! That's him! That's the one! That's the one! What's happening?! Are you guys gonna eat me? You'll see! [WHIMPERS.]
Hey, wait! This is really suspenseful! [WHACK!.]
[GROANING.]
What is this'? This is the rite of forest justice.
ALL: Huzzah! Finn the human boy, for your crimes against the inhabitants of the forest, you must enter the Earth and become one with the soil! [MOANS.]
Don't I get a trial or something?! No! Lower the cage! ALL: Huzzah! I'm totes gonna die, and now Jake won't get his story, and he'll die too because I still don't have a happy ending! Huh? ALL: [CHANTING.]
Ooh iggy boo boo! Ooh iggy boo boo! Ooh iggy boo boo! Ooh iggy boo boo! - Wait a minute! I may be busy dying, but you need to get busy living! ALL: Huh?! Y'all are living some unhappy lives.
You, Boobafina You love Mr.
Goose.
You just need to tell him.
What? She loves you.
Y'all just need to hook it up.
I-I've been wanting to date you for years.
You really love me? I do.
Oh! ALL: Huzzah! And you, Mr.
Fox -- you need to face facts, man.
Boobafina is not interested.
It's time to move on.
It's true.
It's for the best.
And, hey, jerky teenage bear.
What? Your mom is right.
You shouldn't go around fighting strangers in the forest.
Yeah! [SMACK!.]
Mama bear, your son's not a baby anymore.
You should stop spanking him in the face.
He's right.
It's time to let you grow up.
Yeah, that's the stuff! ALL: Huzzah! And Mrs.
Cow, take that bag off your udder.
You're beautiful, girl.
You live in the forest, so why don't you just let it hang out? ALL: Huzzah! Oh! Ugh! No! Yo, put that bag back on! ALL: Huzzah! Silence! Finn the human, for meddling in our lives and disturbing the order of the forest We thank you.
What?! [LAUGHING.]
Our lives have improved since you came here.
Does that mean you're gonna release me? Your cage is made of sticks, brother.
Just kick it apart.
Cool! Yah! [GRUNTS.]
I'm coming for you, Jake -- With a story! And then what happened? [COUGHS.]
And then everyone in the forest was happy.
The end.
[GASPS.]
What?! What's Wrong?! That wasperfect! I feel a million times better.
Really? Yeah.
Yeah! The romance stopped my fever, the suspense cured my headache, and everything else cured everything else! I'm not sick! I'm not sick! [CHUCKLES.]
Neat.
[COUGHS.]
Mm.
Finn, come on! Dance the health dance with me.
Nah, I'm good.
Ah-ah-ah.
.
.
ah-choo! You allergic to my health dance? [GROANS.]
No, I just feelbad.
Oh, Finn, did you catch my sick? Yeah.
I think so.
Well, I know just how to make you feel better -- Blankie, rubby, and best of all, a good story.
Once upon a time [SNORES.]
The end.
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree
[PENGUINS CHIRP.]
[ALL CHEERING.]
[SCREECHES.]
Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the dog and Finn the human The fun will never end It's Adventure Time JAKE: [GROANING.]
Blankie me.
Blankie me, Finn.
I'll get your blanket, dude.
Where is it? Right here.
Why don't you just get it yourself? Because I'm sick! Poor guy.
[GROANS.]
Too hot! Oh, man, Jake.
Is there anything I can do to make you feel better? Soup me, Finny.
Soup-flavored cure coming on through.
[SNIFFS.]
[CREAKY.]
[GULP!.]
Do you feel better now? Yes.
Bleagh! Tell me a story.
- Once upon a time -- - No! I already heard that story before! But you've already heard all my stories before.
Make me a new one, Finn -- A new story.
Okay.
Got it! Once upon a time -- - No! What's the matter? I don't want a made-up story.
I need a real story! Hmm.
Now, you hang on, my friend.
I'll be right back.
Okay, world, give me a story for Jake! [GASPS.]
[LAUGHS.]
[WHIMPERING.]
FINN: Jake! Jake! Check it out.
This true story is going to totally cure you.
Oh, my gosh.
What is it'? First, the leaf fell off a tree.
Oh, but, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Spit it out! The snail was on the leaf! The end.
Oh, no.
Now I feel a thousand times worse.
Finn, a story's got to have excitement, romance, suspens-s-s-e, and it has to have a happy ending.
[SNIFFLES.]
ButI don't know how to make that stuff happen.
That's okay, buddy.
Just dig me a hole, then.
Actually, two holes -- one for my guts and one for my face, 'cause when I die, my guts are gonna blow out of my face! I am not gonna let that happen, dude! Then go get me that story.
And make sure it has all the stuff on this list.
I'll be back as fast as I can! I won't let your guts blow out of your face! Hmm.
"Romance" -- that should be easy.
Hey, how about you two'? Are y'all in love? La ba gi na goo da di dah.
Uh [ANGRILY.]
La nah gee ga rah la na! Um [SNORING.]
Are y'all kissing in there?! BOTH: Eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, eek! [THUD!.]
Hmm.
Maybe I should smo-o-o-ove out my approach a bit.
Normal guy, forest guy Just like normal forest guy Whoa! Hey, so, uhyeah.
So, yeah, can I, um Could I watch you guys kissing? What?! Ugh! I just need to f-for my friend.
He's really sick, and unless I tell him about watching you guys kissing and may-- Uck! What a weirdo! You are one sick man, mister! Yeah.
What's this "friend's" name, huh? Jake! His name's Jake! Pff! Yeah, right! Sounds pretty fake.
Come on, Boobafina.
Let's get out of here.
Yeah.
Wait! I'll do anything! Would you eat dirt? I would for Jake.
[MUNCH! MUNCH! GAG! MUNCH!.]
[GULP!.]
Okay, HOW you guys kiss! Man, what a freak.
Let's go.
What?! No! Jake needs this! Stop! [HONKING, GROWLING, GRUNTING.]
Justcomeon! What?! No! Gah! Wait! [ALL GRUNTING.]
[SMOOCH!.]
Aaah! [PANTING.]
You see? No big deal! Pyah! Poo! Poo! [COUGHING.]
[CRYING.]
I can't believe you made me do that! I'm secretly in love with Mr.
Goose! And now he'll never love me because now I'm soiled! [SOBBING.]
Oh, no! Oh, no! I really did want to kiss Boobafina.
I'm secretly in love with her.
Okay.
Sweet.
No, no.
It had to happen naturally.
Now she'll never love me.
[SOBBING.]
[SIGHS.]
That's wasn't smoove.
But it's all worth it to save Jake -- whatever it takes! Okay.
A good fight.
[CAN CLACKS, SPRAYS.]
Hey.
You want to fight me? Oh, heck, yeah! I've been waiting for this my whole life! Yes! Ha ha ha! WOMAN: Oh, no, you don't! [SMACK!.]
You never let me do anything! [GROWLS.]
Ugh! Rawr! Ufigh! You killed him! Mom, quit touching me.
You killed him, and now he's dead! He's probably not dead! I'm sorry, though, that you think he's dead! Mm.
I don't want to hurt aminals, but -- but Jake! [SIGHS.]
Okay.
Okay, what's next? [BIRDS PEEPING.]
Oh! [GASPS.]
"Suspens-s-s-e"! Hey.
Hey, you guys.
[EVILLY.]
You want to die? ALL: Aaah! [ALL GRUNT.]
Boys! Boys? Have you seen my boys? [WHIMPERING.]
No! Aah! I can't do it! I-I can't keep messing with folks.
Aaaaaaah! But Jake needs me! But I-l can't keep messing with folks! But Jake's really sick! But I can't! But -- but -- but -- but -- aah! [SIGHS.]
[THUNK!.]
Ow! Hey! Who threw -- aaaah! Tie him up! That's him! That's the one! That's the one! What's happening?! Are you guys gonna eat me? You'll see! [WHIMPERS.]
Hey, wait! This is really suspenseful! [WHACK!.]
[GROANING.]
What is this'? This is the rite of forest justice.
ALL: Huzzah! Finn the human boy, for your crimes against the inhabitants of the forest, you must enter the Earth and become one with the soil! [MOANS.]
Don't I get a trial or something?! No! Lower the cage! ALL: Huzzah! I'm totes gonna die, and now Jake won't get his story, and he'll die too because I still don't have a happy ending! Huh? ALL: [CHANTING.]
Ooh iggy boo boo! Ooh iggy boo boo! Ooh iggy boo boo! Ooh iggy boo boo! - Wait a minute! I may be busy dying, but you need to get busy living! ALL: Huh?! Y'all are living some unhappy lives.
You, Boobafina You love Mr.
Goose.
You just need to tell him.
What? She loves you.
Y'all just need to hook it up.
I-I've been wanting to date you for years.
You really love me? I do.
Oh! ALL: Huzzah! And you, Mr.
Fox -- you need to face facts, man.
Boobafina is not interested.
It's time to move on.
It's true.
It's for the best.
And, hey, jerky teenage bear.
What? Your mom is right.
You shouldn't go around fighting strangers in the forest.
Yeah! [SMACK!.]
Mama bear, your son's not a baby anymore.
You should stop spanking him in the face.
He's right.
It's time to let you grow up.
Yeah, that's the stuff! ALL: Huzzah! And Mrs.
Cow, take that bag off your udder.
You're beautiful, girl.
You live in the forest, so why don't you just let it hang out? ALL: Huzzah! Oh! Ugh! No! Yo, put that bag back on! ALL: Huzzah! Silence! Finn the human, for meddling in our lives and disturbing the order of the forest We thank you.
What?! [LAUGHING.]
Our lives have improved since you came here.
Does that mean you're gonna release me? Your cage is made of sticks, brother.
Just kick it apart.
Cool! Yah! [GRUNTS.]
I'm coming for you, Jake -- With a story! And then what happened? [COUGHS.]
And then everyone in the forest was happy.
The end.
[GASPS.]
What?! What's Wrong?! That wasperfect! I feel a million times better.
Really? Yeah.
Yeah! The romance stopped my fever, the suspense cured my headache, and everything else cured everything else! I'm not sick! I'm not sick! [CHUCKLES.]
Neat.
[COUGHS.]
Mm.
Finn, come on! Dance the health dance with me.
Nah, I'm good.
Ah-ah-ah.
.
.
ah-choo! You allergic to my health dance? [GROANS.]
No, I just feelbad.
Oh, Finn, did you catch my sick? Yeah.
I think so.
Well, I know just how to make you feel better -- Blankie, rubby, and best of all, a good story.
Once upon a time [SNORES.]
The end.
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree