Ally Mcbeal s04e23 Episode Script

Previously on Ally McBeal: For once in my life I have someone - I'm afraid to trust it.
- Then we need to work on that too.
He had dessert with his ex.
He canceled lunch with me to get creamed by her.
- Ally.
- I don't trust him.
- He leaves notes.
- Sorry? He can't deal with goodbyes, so he leaves notes.
I'm gonna get a note.
- Larry Paul - I don't want to hear his name.
He dropped off a note.
Mommy, the man's head got cut off.
Oh.
It's too bad, honey.
I don't think they make the men as strong as the women.
Well, forget about him.
We'll get you another one, honey, okay? Never, never, never Gonna get married Never, never, never Gonna get married Never, never, never Aw.
What a sweet little birdie.
Come on over here.
Come on.
Come on, let me pet you, little darling.
Come on.
What a sweet little birdie.
Yeah, let me kiss you.
Oh.
What a precious little thing.
Ally? Ally, honey? Hi, Mom.
Bad dream.
- What was it about? - It was nothing.
Two outs in the 9th, and a ground ball to 1 st.
It was nothing.
- Honey, are you okay? - Fine.
I'm fine.
- Can I get you something? - No, Mom, I'm fine.
Good night.
I've been down this road The Wedding Walking the line That's painted by pride And I have made mistakes in my life That I just can't hide Oh, I believe I am ready For what love has to bring I got myself together Yeah, now I'm ready to sing I've been searching my soul tonight I know there's so much more to life Now I know I can shine a light To find my way back home Oh, baby, yeah Oh, yeah First up, new hire.
I'd like you meet Jane Wilco, my new assistant.
- Hi, everybody.
- Jane? - Hi, John.
- You're working here? Well, I'm really an actress, so if I mess up as an assistant Richard has told me how nice you all are.
- Anyway.
Am I off to a good start? - Oh, excellent.
- Take a break.
You've earned it.
- Thank you.
It was a pleasure to meet you.
- What skills does she have? - Warmth.
You can't do it alone, Ling.
Next, Wyatt vs.
Mason.
New client coming in at 10.
- You take it.
- What's it about? - I don't know.
- Why are you giving it to me? - You know.
- I know what? I figured you could use the distraction.
- I am completely fine.
- Who do you think you're kidding? What? We're all family.
If one of us hurts, we all hurt.
Am I right, Ling? - Ow.
- Whatever.
When you're down and troubled - What, you think that's funny? - I didn't say anything.
Oh.
Ally, your 10:00 is here.
- Why are you dressed like that? - Like what? Forget it.
- I'm Ally McBeal.
- Hi, I'm Reverend Harris.
- This is Malcolm Wyatt.
- Hi.
- Do I know you? - Oh, possibly.
The firm hired me as an expert witness.
It was a fascinating case.
Human cloning.
Fascinating.
I'm also a reverend.
God and science are not always mutually exclusive.
- It's fascinating.
- I see.
And Malcolm? Malcolm is one of my choir boys.
I brought him because I think he may have a cause of action.
He's in dire and immediate need of an attorney.
- And the case is? - Malcolm's prom is next week.
He was so excited, he asked his date in the fall.
Suddenly, a week before the prom, she says she's going with another boy! - Have I laid the facts out correctly? - Yes.
Get a court order forcing this girl to live up to her promise.
To get that kind of order, we must prove irreparable harm.
Well, is there something special about this girl? Yes.
Tell her why.
Fill out your responses.
Well, we've been best friends since the 9th grade.
And I love her.
I don't think I could ever love anybody else.
- I'm not sure.
- Could you try, Ms.
McBeal? - Well - May I speak with you in private? Sure.
We can go into my - Is something the matter? - No, that's just - No.
We can go into my office.
- Okay.
You stay here, Malcolm.
The reason this case is rather special is that Malcolm he's a bit of a necrophiliac.
- A what? He almost never leaves the house.
- He comes out sometimes.
- I think that you mean agoraphobic.
Oh, yes, I get them mixed up.
What's a necrophiliac again? Someone who likes to have sex with dead people.
- You were saying? - He's not one of those.
- I understand.
- Anyway It was huge for him to ask this girl, and this is so important.
He was to sing at the prom.
He has a lovely Forgive me, Ms.
McBeal, I'm still stuck on necrophiliac.
He is not one of those.
I must have just plucked it out of a crossword.
- I'll pretend I never heard it.
He has a lovely voice.
Lovely voice.
He sings in my choir.
But I could almost never get him to even consider a solo.
He's just that shy.
But then he was so flushed with confidence when she said yes he agreed to sing a solo at the prom.
And now that she's backed out, he's just so regressed.
But going to a judge? The kids will find out.
I understand that, but I think it will empower him to have taken action to remedy being wronged eventually, it will embolden him.
- Okay.
- Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Since your firm has faced her lawyer before, that should be an advantage.
Yeah, it can be, depend - Who's her lawyer? - Larry Paul.
- You been up against him personally? - Yeah, you could say that.
Oh, excellent.
So I'll see you in the courthouse.
Oh, take me in your arms Rescue me I want your tender charms 'Cause I'm lonely And I'm blue I need you - Come on, baby, and rescue me - Rescue me - You could call him.
- It's against the law for me to call.
- He's technically the dumpee - I'm fine.
Don't you see me having a good time? Yes.
It's infectious.
Come on.
Let's dance.
You know, thank you for caring.
Having friends like you has just made the whole thing a lot easier.
For once in my life I won't let sorrow hurt me Everything okay? - Yeah.
It's just a catchy song.
- You're not moving.
I actually have to be in court first thing tomorrow, so I'm gonna go.
- What are you doing? - Oh, just thinking about my track record.
He hasn't even called? Nope.
So you'll see him in court, opposing lawyers.
Yeah, I guess so.
Do you remember when we used to play the song? - Do I remember? - Could you play it for me, Renee? I could really use it.
Sure.
Sure.
Okay.
Goodnight, my someone Goodnight, my love Sleep tight, my someone Sleep tight, my love Our star is shining Its brightest light For goodnight, my love You'll beat this.
I know.
I know I will.
- First I gotta beat him in court.
- Yep.
Is there a particular place for me to stand? I want to stand in the right place.
I know how much decorum matters.
- You can just sit at the table.
- Oh.
- Why are you doing this to me? - Let's let the lawyers talk.
You're representing her? Are you Corretta? Yeah.
Yeah.
This is so embarrassing.
Why don't you go inside? Ms.
McBeal and I will be in in a second.
Malcolm, come on.
Silly case, huh? Yeah.
Have you heard from him? No.
I expected him to be handling this, actually.
- Ally - Hm? He went back to Detroit.
Oh.
- To live? - Yeah.
Not with her.
But to be near his son, I guess.
Oh.
Oh, so he's gone.
Yeah.
Well.
We'd better get in there.
You can't force a girl to go to a prom with a boy.
We're asking her to live up to her vow to go with him.
What happens when people forsake vows? What about the institution of proms? - Lf he wants to sue for money - Money won't help.
It's the prom.
Which is why she should go with the boy of her choice.
Not if she promised him.
Now people need to live up to promises of the heart.
Best she learn that.
- Where's the irreparable harm here? - Well sometimes, judge, there is only one.
One prom.
- And also one - Your Honor? May I add something? - I'm Malcolm's reverend.
- Go ahead.
This isn't simply about a date.
Malcolm's a borderline necrophiliac.
Agoraphobiac.
Oh, my God.
Agoraphobiac.
I apologize profusely.
I do crosswords.
What Dr.
Harris is trying to say is that the rejection could cause irreparable social harm.
Everyone gets their heart broken, Your Honor, it's a fact of life.
- I want to hear from the boy.
- That may be really difficult for him.
If he has any chance of getting this court order he'll have to take the stand.
I cried for a few days.
But then I thought I was over it.
Then you realized you weren't.
There isn't a lot of fish in the sea.
Sometimes, there's just one fish.
You believed Andrea Mason to be this one fish because? We just laugh together like She's the only one who's ever gotten me, who truly knows me.
- Son, you're only 17.
- Your Honor, if I may respond to that.
Where's it written that love comes to a person in their 20s, 30s or 40s? Love can come early, and it can come but once.
Once, I say.
I'll say it again.
- No more from you.
- Sir, I'm filling out his responses.
I said I'm not interested.
Son, like Ms.
Lipp stated, we all fall in love.
I told everybody she's coming with me.
If she doesn't They already laugh at me.
Now You get my sympathy, but I can't give you a court order.
Ms.
McBeal, was it my fault? Did I breach decorum? No.
Malcolm, could you sit? We didn't deserve to win.
Why? Because the harm isn't irreparable.
There will be other loves.
Now, I loved this boy my whole life.
I thought we were put on this earth for each other.
He went away, married, came back, died, life went on.
Then this year, I met this other boy, and he was so - You met him.
Larry Paul? - He's dandy.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Well, I He went away.
Well, I still love him in such a way it's impossible to believe anybody else could make me so happy.
- But you know what, Malcolm? - What? Sorry.
Experience tells me that I will love again.
And I will be loved again.
Now, maybe not tomorrow, but I will love again.
You know what Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you? I think.
You still believe in love.
Exactly.
And you have to.
Yeah, you just You have to.
Okay.
But the prom is Friday.
Bunch of weak little crybabies.
"Oh, he broke my heart.
" - Does your heart hurt? - No! - No, what? - No, sir! - Can we live alone? - No, sir! - What?! - Huh? I mean, yes! - Yes, what? - Yes, sir! - What do I want to hear? - Men suck, sir! - I can't hear you! - Men suck, sir! - Say it again! - Men suck, sir! Hi, Ling.
- Jane.
- Tarzan.
- How's it going so far? - Okay, I think.
You know my L.
A.
Blood, this place is a little cold.
- Boston? - This firm.
I'm kind of surprised.
Cold isn't necessarily bad.
Cold cash, cold truth.
- These are good things, right? - It's just you and John are so kind.
I figured your firm would be more kind.
That's mine.
Maybe a cold call.
- Hello? What do I say, Cage and Fish? - That's Yeah.
Cage and Fish.
Ally? Oh.
Hello.
- Are you praying? - No, I came to see you.
And I was just, you know, thinking.
Dr.
Harris told me that you were supposed to sing at the prom.
Yeah.
I think that you still should.
I've heard that you have an amazing voice and You know, if you were chosen, you do, obviously.
I wasn't chosen.
- I asked to.
- Oh, well, okay.
Why? Why? I don't know.
I didn't want them to pick on Andrea.
Who, the other kids? - Why would they pick on Andrea? - For going with me.
- You wanted to show them all - That there's something I'm good at.
I think you can still do that.
Has Andrea ever heard you sing? - Not solo.
- You should really get up there.
I'm not going to the prom alone.
I'm not that pathetic.
Right.
Right.
Well Would you be embarrassed to take an older woman? - You? - I'm in between relationships now.
- You want to go to the prom with me? - Well, if you'll sing.
- It's tonight.
- All I have to do is get a dress.
Which is easy for girls.
I just have to go in a dress store and grab one off the rack.
- You don't have to do that.
Well, I'd like to.
I could use a night out.
Okay.
Great.
I gotta go because I gotta go get a dress.
Okay.
- Hi.
- Hi, Jane.
Everything going okay? Yes, thank you.
But I think Richard's a little sad.
- Why's that? - He's just sitting in his office basically has a sign saying: "Go away, I'm sad.
" Well, Richard's a little difficult to read sometimes.
- I could go check on him, okay? - Thank you.
GO AWAY.
I'M SAD.
- You're very astute.
- Does he do this a lot? Let me talk to him.
What's going on? I'm sad.
I can read between the lines.
What about? - This is a cold place.
- Cold? How? How? Jane said something about We used to all be friends, go to the bar, laugh - We all cared about each other.
- We still go to the bar.
What happened? This isn't the kind of firm we planned.
All you've ever sought is money.
For me, yes.
But I wanted to at least be surrounded with a little humanity to go with my money.
I've had a wonderful year, as has Ally.
We've loved, had our hearts broken, felt enormous pain.
But we've lived, emotionally.
I've even seen a side of you crack through with Jane that I never What Jane is referring to, what you're feeling most of the people here don't live emotionally.
We need to fix that.
I want this to be a place of compassion.
Shall we fire them? Well, as acts of compassion go, that wouldn't be my first choice.
But, it is time for a change.
A big one.
- Are you chaperoning or? - No, I'm going as somebody's date.
To a prom? - Aren't you a little vintage? - Can you just help me with the dress? I have a lovely chiffon gown that would go beautifully with your Botox.
- Can I see it? - Certainly.
Seems like the other day Your baby went away He went away from the sea He said that you were through He found somebody new Oh, let me think, let me think What can I do? Oh, no Oh, no, oh, no, no, no, no Are you worried you won't be able to fit into it? You're going to a prom? Can I go? I love that young wattle.
You need someone to talk to.
Jane's new in town.
It'd be nice for her to be with people her age.
- I have a sugar low.
I need a boost.
- Do you really want to go? - Yes.
- All right.
Ally? - Your dad's here.
- Where? - He went down to the bar.
- At 4:00? - Hi, Daddy.
- Hey, sweetie.
- What's wrong? - Oh, nothing.
- He once sang a song to me there.
- Here, let me No, it's okay.
It's okay.
- So Mom says you want to kill him.
- Oh, no.
- Only a little.
- He didn't really do anything wrong.
Part of me wishes that he had.
If I could hate him, it'd be easier.
Sweetheart, he got up and walked away.
That's hardly noble.
Oh, he was in a lot of pain.
He used to write me songs just like you did.
In a lot of ways, he's a lot like you.
Maybe you're lucky he left.
You okay? Yeah.
I have dreamed thee too long Never seen thee or touched thee But known thee with all of my heart Half a prayer, half a song Thou hast always been with me Though we have been always apart Dulcinea Dulcinea I have sought thee, sung thee Dreamed thee Dulcinea And thy name is like a prayer An angel whispers You know, it's okay to cry all day if you have to.
Nighttime too.
I'm doing good, Daddy.
I really am.
I remember my senior prom.
I went with Peter Poppil.
He was so cute.
I lost my virginity.
- To a guy named Peter Poppil? - No, he was just my date.
I can't remember the name of the guy I slept with.
I think he was tall.
I gotta get you another clip.
Prom night.
I'll never forget that.
Why haven't you been coming around this year? Did you meet somebody else up there? You haven't called me or needed me.
- And you think I do now? - I'm just checking in.
Do you think you could give God a little message for me? Absolutely not.
So why are you here, Billy? Just to share a little classified information.
There's a very happy life ahead of you.
I never doubted it.
Then I guess I'll be going.
Billy? Um Thank you.
Love you.
Ally.
Your date is here.
Oh.
Hey.
Hi, Malcolm.
You look really handsome.
- You look beautiful.
- Oh, well Thanks.
Well, um Let's go to the prom.
What are you doing? Baby, babe, let's get together Honey, honey, me and you And do the things, oh do the things That we like to do Do a little dance Make a little love Get down tonight You're doing great.
You can really dance.
Thank you.
Can I ask you a question? Are you his mother? I'm his mistress.
Get down, get down Get down tonight, baby I'm your boogie man That's what I am I'm here to do Whatever I can This is me.
This song was my inspiration.
"I'm Your Boogie Man"? - Shall we show them how to hustle? - Go, Tarzan.
Born to lead.
All right, children? Young people, give me some space.
Watch carefully.
Follow if you can.
Turn me on, I'm your boogie man Boogie man Do what you want I'm your boogie man, boogie man Do what you want I'm your boogie man - Do you know how to do the hustle? - No.
Well, just follow along.
I can't.
I'm having trouble moving.
Well, wait.
Are you okay? I can't.
I can't sing a solo here.
Yes, you can.
She's here, I Dr.
Harris says your voice is amazing.
You have to take center stage someday.
Why not tonight? - I might faint.
- No.
- She's here.
- You are not gonna faint.
- Oh, God.
- Just relax.
Just relax.
Short break from KC as our orchestra settles in.
Next, we have a song from a graduating senior, Malcolm Wyatt.
Malcolm, you're up, buddy.
Whoo! Whoo! All right, go ahead.
- Is he any good? - God, I hope so.
- I hope I haven't made a mistake.
- It's not like anybody's gonna hear.
Shh! Through the darkness I can see your light And you will always shine And I can feel your heart in mine Your face I've memorized I idolize just you I look up to Everything you are In my eyes you do no wrong I've loved you for so long And after all is said and done You're still you After all You're still you In my eyes you do no wrong And I believe in you Although you never asked me to I will remember you And what life put you through And in this cruel And lonely world I found one love You're still you After all You're still you It was the most amazing voice I've ever heard.
- Right.
- No, it was, Malcolm.
You have a gift.
- They seemed to like it.
- They loved it.
You heard them.
Thank you.
I don't know if I would have gotten up there Thank you.
Oh! This is my place, actually.
Shouldn't I be walking you home? That's okay.
I had such a wonderful time.
- Really? - Really.
You helped me.
You have no idea.
It's late.
My parents are probably wondering.
You know, you will meet somebody.
I will, and you will.
Yeah.
Until then, what's that song you sing? "Goodnight My Someone.
" Yeah, until then, we'll sing that.
Yeah, till then.
- Good night.
- Good night.
You stinker!