Big Shots (2007) s01e02 Episode Script
Tall, dark and hairless
Previously on "Big Shots" if we did it like this when we were married, we might still be married.
Or just very, very tired.
What kind of man would be so deceitful as to lie to the woman he's cheating on his wife with? What are you saying? You're gonna tell her about us? What are you doing here? Well, I came here to tell her.
And then we got to talking.
You hit it off with my wife? There are rumors that might interest your shareholders.
You got a knobber from a tranny? And what kind of journalist would I be if I didn't ask? Were you having an affair with my boss? Yes.
- He fired you? - No one knows yet.
It won't be official till tomorrow.
He came out of nowhere! My boss! You can forget 911.
Things are suddenly looking up for you, huh, james? Hey, sweetie.
No, we just took off.
I should be back in a few hours.
Of course I remember what tonight is.
And you know I would never miss - - fruit plate, sir? Sex night.
Yes, it's priority for me, too, hon.
I'm doing 600 miles an hour in a g5 -- practically the speed of sound.
Hold on.
I'll ask.
Hey.
Can this thing go any faster? Brody Johns,founder,alpha crisis management.
Oh, god! That was fantastic.
And that thing you did with your elbow -- That's sweet of you, karl.
But I really think we need to talk.
"Talk"? Okay, sure.
We can talk.
What's up? Actually, not here.
But I know the perfect place.
Mr.
Mixworthy, nice to see you again, you and yourmistress.
Karl Mixworthy,ceo,devotion pharmaceuticals.
So, how does it feel to be C.
E.
O.
? Great.
Running a multibillion-dollar conglomerate -- I like low-pressure jobs.
You're gonna have to talk to her sooner or later, you know.
Well, she slept with my boss, katie.
Well, look at the bright side.
He's dead, so at least you won't have to run into him in the men's room.
It just doesn't feel right when my job is less pressure than my marriage.
James Walker,ceo,amerimart industries We are on fire.
Our pending acquisition of jailbait cosmetics makes reveal the most potent force in the personal-grooming industry Even better news, I just received word that my profile will grace the november cover of entrepreneur monthly magazine.
We are on the top of our game.
Life can't get much better than this.
Hi, sweetie.
But it can certainly get worse.
Duncan Collinsworth,ceo,reveal cosmeties.
Big Shots Season 1 Episode 2 You're ending it? Look, it's just not right, karl.
Your wife's my new best friend.
Best friend? You've known her a week and a half.
But you know what? You're right.
- I am? - She is? Yes.
This is definit UhI-I-is there something wrong, marla? I guess just part of me thought that karl might actually put up a fight.
But now it's clear the kind of man karl is -- a man without the decency to fight for his own mistress! Well, I have to say, these sessions are becoming very confusing.
Brody: If I tell you guys something, do you promise not to laughtoo loudly? Last night was sex night.
Sex night? Yeah, me and janelle.
Every tuesday.
No matter how tired or busy we are, we make an appointment for sex.
Wendy and I used to have a sex night.
Then it becameaco night.
Wow, that's depressing.
How do you think I feel?I used to race home for nookie.
Now, just happy if she remembers the guacamole.
Anyway, so, janelle says she doesn't think sex night is special anymore.
She wants me to come up with some ideas to spice things up.
Don't look at me.
My sex night doesn't even involve other people.
Can I be honest? With sex tips like that, it's amazing either of you have issues with women.
Where the hell is duncan when you need him? Uhbrody? Here comes your female expert.
We need to talk.
Now, now, wait.
I don't understand.
That reporter is running the yonkers story? I thought we took care of that.
We did.
Except for one thing.
Tell him what you told me.
That night at the club when duncan bribed me to keep quiet about what happened with me and him - yeah? - Well, I kind of taped it.
He taped it.
He taped it! You taped it?! The reporter paid me to.
Said it could be a big story.
Unfortunately, the biggest thing in that story was your penis, which I'm still not quite sure how you didn't notice.
That reporter lied to me, said my profile was a puff piece, told me it was a dead end.
That's because she doesn't want you to stop it.
I feel terrible that I gave her the tape.
That's why I came back.
The guilt is killing me.
I can barely eat.
My work is suffering.
Your work is suffering? You're a prostitute.
What have I stumbled upon here, duncan? Meeting of your corporate board? Actually, it's a search party, terrence.
We're out here looking for your business ethics.
Dirtbag.
Ran into your ex-wife yesterday -- lisbeth.
Terrific woman, she is.
You're not her type.
Oh.
What is her type? - Me.
- Okay.
Well, always good seeing you, duncan.
I'll let you get back to your, umménagetrois.
Oh, he's cute.
Who's that? Terrence hill -- corporate raider with the conscience of an assassin.
He's a member here.
Hates duncan.
Really?Why? A few years back, I rear-ended his sister in the parking lot.
Never forgiven me.
Maybe that's because neither of you were in your cars at the time.
Look, you got a problem here, but don't worry, 'cause when guys like you have problems, they call guys like me.
Actually I may be able to fix this one all on my own.
Hello? Lori, hey.
Duncan collinsworth.
How's my favorite reporter doing? I was wondering if I could bend your ear when you get a minute.
On the record, of course.
Look, you are not the first guy who's been cheated on, you know? It's 2007.
It's a lot more common than you think.
- Wait, you never - - me? No, not my style.
- When I'm unhappy in a relationship, I just - end it.
No.
No, I accrazy enough so they do.
But, I mean, it's the same general idea.
It's just that I never thought I wouldn't know how to face my own wife.
The truth is, I don't even know where to start.
You could start by talking to her.
Stacey: Or maybe you could just start by listening.
Hi, honey.
Sorry I'm late.
I know dinner's usually at 7:00.
Wendy? Hello? Oh.
I, uh didn't know you had, uh Company.
All right, sweetie.
I'll be right back, okay? What's going on here? Why is she crying? Marla and her boyfriend broke up yesterday.
Apparently, he didn't even put up a fight.
Said he was relieved.
Boyfriend.
I didn't even know she was dating anyone.
I didn't, either.
Truth is, I think he was married.
M-married? Oh, really? Did she mention a name? - Kyle.
- Kyle? Yes, karl.
Kyle.
Anyway, this kyle fellow sounds like a real operator, which is ironic, because marla says he's quite unappealing physically.
Homely, even.
guess Right.
Well I should wash up for dinner.
Oh, about that, marla's been in a state all afternoon, and I haven't had a moment to cook.
But there's some cold chicken in the fridge if you're hungry.
See?It's been like this all afternoon.
You'll excuse me.
You're late.
Sweet duncan, it's nice to know you don't trust just anybody to get your latte.
Cam, I can't have this.
Jailbait cosmetics is the hottest takeover target in town.
Every corp with fresh cash is eyeing it.
It's all hands on deck here, including yours.
Yeah, about that -- jailbait -- I hate to burst your bubble, duncan, but their products aren't exactly cutting-edge.
None of the girls in my dorm uld touch their stuff.
Thanks.
I'll be sure to inform the board that my daughter doesn't approve of the deal.
But until then, I'll need copies of the disclosure documents distributed A.
S.
A.
P.
No problem -- how long could it take to copy a little paperwork? I don't know.
You tell me.
It's 20 years, stacey.
20 years.
Three cities, two kids.
And after all that, this is how you repay me? By sleeping with my boss? I told you it was a mistake, and that's all it was.
- Did you love him? - No.
God, no.
- Then, how could you - - I don't know.
I don't know.
Maybe I was bored.
Maybe I was scared that you were.
That at any moment, I'd become one of these "first wives of firmwood" whose husbands traded them in for a newer model.
But I'm here right now because I miss you so much.
The kids miss you.
We want you to come home.
You don't think I want to be home? You don't think I'd rather be with you guys than sitting in my furnished room at the club watching the mets highlights? - But what you did - - what I did was a mistake, james.
You're the only man that I've loved that I've ever loved my whole life.
And I'm asking you not to make the same mistake I did by risking the next 20 years because you forgot even for a second w wonderful the last 20 years have been.
You're going home? Yep.
Tonight after work.
I told stacey I'd give her another chance.
I didn't see that one coming.
I can't be that guy who sees his kids on the weekends or just walks away from the marriage 'cause it's not perfect anymore.
You're doing the right thing.
Wife, kids -- no self-respecting man can casually walk away from that.
What?Lisbeth changed the locks.
I had no choice.
Oh, and how is operation: Mistress removal going? Uh, not too well, but I'm taking wendy to dinner tonight, some quality time alone together.
It's impressive, karl.
The first man in history actually had to break up his wife and girlfriend.
You see, james?You're not alone.
Relationships are full of pain and problems.
That's why you really need to work on the pep talk.
Things change.
Lisbeth and i went through a divorce, and now the chemistry -- mmm -- is better than ever.
Took an affair with a lunatic to get me to appreciate my wife.
Even good relationships change.
I mean, look at janelle and I.
When we first met, I did everything for her.
You still do everything for her.
Yeah, but now I don't fight it.
I should run.
I don't want to be late for my date.
With who?Lisbeth? The reporter that's doing the profile on him.
I figure I'd appeal to her face-to-face, get her to see the real duncan collinsworth.
This doesn't go well, does it? Not even a little bit.
Daddy!Daddy, you're home! Hey!Come here.
Oh, god, I missed you guys.
How was your trip?Was it fun? Uhyeah.
Yeah, it was fun.
Well, not as much fun as coming home.
Hey, kids, go inside and get daddy what you made for him.
Remember? - Hi.
- Hi.
Never been so nervous about coming home from work before.
Well, I've never been so nervous that you wouldn'T.
Come inside.
Mr.
Walker.
- Yes.
Can I help you? - Hi.
Reuben mays, harrison police.
I'm here to ask you a few questions about the death of walter storrs, your former boss.
"Questions"?Heas hit by a golf cart.
His death was an accident.
Actuly, we've classified it as murder.
Now, if I might have a moment of your time the golf cart was an accident, Mr.
Walker, but the autopsy results showed trace amounts of a drug called arsenic trioxide in his system.
Someone tried to poison him? Oh, they did more than just try.
The poison weakened his heart.
Otherwise he would have survived the impact of the golf cart.
It looks like your former boss had enemies.
Enemielike who? Oh, I don'know, like the husband of the woman he was sleeping with.
All right, wait a second.
First of all, I didn't know about the affair until after he died, okay? And second of all, I'm the one who tried to save walter's life.
And third, after all that, you're the guy that got his job.
What -- what are you saying? Are you implying that I killed him for his job? For god's sakes, I've been with amerimart since business school.
Ied tt job,detective.
I'm sure you did.
The only question is, how? When i asked you to dinner, I really did mean dinner.
And when I asked for seconds, it had nothing to do with food.
Leaving already? I've got work to do.
Your profile isn't gonna write itself.
About that I didn't want to bring it up over dinner, but now that we know each other better Maybe there's no need to mention certain things.
Like certain truck-stop dalliances with 6-foot pre-op transsexuals? That'd be the one.
You're cute, duncan.
Cute and predictable.
T I'm running your profilein full.
No, no.
No, y-y-you don't want to do that.
Hey, look!What did you think? One roll in the hay with duncan collinsworth and you'd rid me of all my journalistic integrity? Listen, this is my career here.
Do you know what will happen if this story goes public? Yes.
I'll get a raise, maybe a book deal.
I-I-I meant to mE.
Good night, duncan.
Thanks for dinner.
Hi.
What's wrong?Lovers' quarrel? Saw her I.
D.
?Realized she was legal? What are you doing here? The acquisition docs, remember? In your hands?A.
S.
A.
P.
? Fine.
Just bring them inside.
By the way, I'm an adult.
Adults are allowed to have houseguests.
Of course.
Just curious if you charge by overnight or hourly rates.
Should have seen her.
She flew out of my apartment like she was double-parked.
Wow!That's your move.
I know.
I mean, what kind of world do we live in where women are more like men than we are? It's sad.
Don't worry.
We'll work this out.
We will do whatever is necessary to make sure that that story never hits the press.
We're gonna get that tape.
And besides, life could always get worse.
How? Well, take me, for instance.
Janelle decided how she wanted to spice up sex night.
She wants me to wax my boys.
Your boys? Yeah, my boys -- down below, round and rounder.
Oh, your boys.
What'd you say? Well, I already waxed my back for her birthday, so I told her no.
The back is one thing, but the nuggets? That's a whole new deal.
First, they beat us at loveless sex.
Now they want us to go hairless for them.
At this rate, in 20 years, we'll be lining up for pap smears.
James, what the hell are you doing? I need your help.
Duncan: They're classifying it as a murder? And I thought I had problems.
It wasn't you who poisoned him.
That's what's important.
It wasn't you, right?I did two semesters of law school, so it would just be between us.
Of course it wasn't me.
The problem is, I'm not sure the cops feel the same way.
Aw, come on.
That's crazy.
If you really look at it, I have motive.
That guy was sleeping with your wife.
Right.
And you got his job.
Yeah, and not only that, walter storrs fired me right before he died.
- If the cops knew that - you didn't tell them that, did you? Of course not.
I haven't told anyone except for you guys.
They're just fishing, trying to see how you react.
So keep your mouth shut, and this will all blow over.
Amazing.
Murder, transsexuals -- and janelle considers you guys my classy friends.
Sweetheart, I'm home! Wendy, I'm here! - Honey? - Wendy? I'm over here.
you two,what's going on.
I'm here to take you to dinner.
All set to go.
Car's still running.
And I'm here for our plans.
You remember, right? Silly me.
I've double-booked.
Sweetie, it's a four-star restaurant.
D to pull all sorts of strings to get us in.
But it's our favorite movie.
And I had to go to three video stores to find it.
It's a two-day rental.
You understand, karl.
We can go out to eat next week, okay? Actually, the truth is, I was hoping to spend some quality time alone together and really reconnect.
Marla loves this part.
We can talk later, okay, karl? Okay, so, what's wrong? Lisbeth.
Hey.
This is a surprise.
What makes you think something's wrong? Oh, I don't know.
Drinking alone might be the first clue.
Oh.
Just work stuff, you know? The acquisition and everything.
Are you eating? Or are you still on an all-vodka diet? I'm fine.
Justwondering.
About what? When it ends.
How much longer can I stay on top? Come on, duncan.
Self-pity doesn't suit you.
You know that.
Besides, they've been trying to knock you off for years.
And as far as I can tell, you're only getting better with age.
So what makes you think they'll be able to do it now? Sometimes I wonder why we ever broke up.
I'll forward you a copy of the deposition.
I have dinner plans inside, and my date's gonna be here any minute, so who is he?No.
Let me guess.
The cool single dad on your block? No, the guy in town with the schnauzer and the fanny pack? Actually, it's the englishman with the aston martin and incredibly bad timing.
Apologies if I'm early.
No, actually, you're right on time.
Uh, I just bumped into duncan.
Well, don't let me keep you.
Enjoy your dinner.
Little tip -- the salmon's her favorite.
Yes, she ordered that on oursecond date.
Always good to see you, duncan.
Shall we? Hope to run into you again soon.
Me too.
With my car.
She's done nothing wrong.
Lisbeth's a free agent.
She can date anyone she wants.
I know, but terrence? He's handsome, charming, smart, if you're into that sort of thing, and he can buy and sell all of us.
If it doesn't work out, maybe u can date him.
Oh, I forgot to tell you.
Janelle upped the ante.
If I get my boys waxed, she bumps sex night to twice a week.
And you're considering it? I have to.
Do you know what guaranteed biweekly sex means to a married man? That he's having an affair? Okay.
Remind me again how we're gonna get this tape.
By relaxing and trusting me.
Okay, any other options? How you doing?You're waiting for me.
- Brody johns? - In the flesh.
- Wait right here.
- Thanks.
What's going on? Calling in a favor.
Guy who owns the building had a little trouble.
I helped him through it.
How? I convinced his wife that the woman she found him in bed with really was a sleep consultant, and I convinced the woman he was in bed with not to tell the wife oerwise.
- Thank you.
- You bet.
Now listen closely.
Lori's at work all day.
The housekeeper doesn't arrive till 2:00, so you just stand watch out front, and I will find the tape.
You sure about this?It doesn't seem very - - what's the word? - Legal.
Listen, when your friend's career hangs in the balance because he tried to bribe a tranny who gave him a knobber at a yonkers rest stop legal's the least of our concerns.
Good point.
Rumor is they're questioning everyone, including storrs' widow.
But let's be honest -- walter storrs wasn't exactly Mr.
Popularity.
Might be quicker to actually round up the people who liked him.
Hey, don't let that cop scare you.
Everyone knows walter loved Y.
Affair aside, you were his right-hand man.
He was grooming you to take over.
It's obvious.
Right.
Of course.
And, by the way, how's everything on the home front? Great.
Now say it like you mean it.
Look, you love her, and that's what's important.
You don't have to forgive her overnight.
Now get back to work before your professional life matches your personal one.
See you later, killer.
How's it going in there? Still looking.
I haven't found it yet.
Hurry up! Aw, she's got a cool cd collection, though.
Duncan? Hey!Lori! What are you doing here? I was just passing by, thought I'd take a chance.
A chance.
At what? Convincing me not to run your story? No, a chance that you'd accept my apology for my behavior the other night, which was awful, by the way.
I was hoping to buy you a cup of coffee so we could talk.
Great.
Let me just grab my things.
Why don't you wait inside? No, no.
This place closes like right now.
Don't be silly.
It'll only take a moment.
Nice place.
What's wrong? You seem so nervous.
I am.
Because we had a connection the other night, and I trieto use it to get you to kill your story, and that was so wrong.
Look, it's understandable.
No, what it is is unforgivable.
Just when I thought I knew you.
You're a complex man, aren't you? Only on the inside.
U know, I don't even drink coffee, and the other night wasn'T all bad, was it? It certainly had its moments.
Why don't I remind you of my favorite one? Well, to be honest, I kind of like this one, too.
Ah, you feel so good.
Thank yoU.
I moisturized.
w we live in the same house, and we sleep in the same bed, but it's like we're strangers now.
And I see how much fun she has with marla, and, well, I'm not afraid to say it, doctor, but I miss my own wife.
Well, I have to say, karl, these emotions are surprisingly human.
Is there anything you'd like to say, wendy? Marla's very possessive.
Possessive?I need the jaws of life to separate you two.
Karl and marla are just like oil and water, but I know that if karl took the time to get to know her, he would feel the same way about her that I do.
Well, uh how do you propose to do that? Actually, I did have one idea.
It's a little unorthodox, but it might just work.
So, where should we start, doctor? There you go.
- Bye, duncan.
- Bye.
I'll call you.
Ew!Are you kidding me?! I panicked.
I didn't know what else to do.
So you slept with her with me in the room? I was trying to distract her so you could get out of the apartment.
And go right to therapy.
More importantly, did you get the tape? No, she must have it somewhere else, but I did find these.
What? Deposit slip large cash payments were made into her account over the last couple of weeks, and it's a lot more money than a reporter would ever make.
Wait a second.
Someone's paying her to run the tranny story? Possibly.
We'll just follow the money trail.
See where it leads.
And could you please stop looking at me? I really need the memory of this to fade naturally.
What do you want? Money? What are you talking about, karl? What's it going to take to get you out of my life and, more importantly, out of my house? I don't want your money, karl.
A friend like wendy is priceless.
Listen to me -- I want my wife back.
And if I have to, I'll tell her about us.
You wouldn't dare.
I mean, what's the worst she's gonndo? Divorce me and take half my assets? But you?She'll never forgive you.
And where will you ever find another friend who will sit through "love affair"? Let's not be rash.
Neither of us want to hurt her, and neither of us want to give her up, so we just need to figure out something that works for both of us.
Actually, I may have an idea.
So, you get her every wednesday night and every other weekend.
And what about jewish holidays? I get those, but I'll tell you what.
I can give you an overnight on good friday.
How's that sound? Throw in presidents' day and you've got aeal.
Deal.
Was he planning on leaving his wife for you? He talked about it.
He filed for divorce the day before he died.
You must have known that.
Yeah.
As soon as his wife found out about us, he decided to file.
Mrs.
Storrs told us that she didn't know about the affair.
That's not what walter said.
Walter said she was quite upset when she found out.
Just one more question, mrs.
Walker.
Were you gonna leave your husband for walter storrs? Mrs.
Walker.
I told you.
I hadn't decided that.
But I only know that I loved him.
Com so, I just got off the phone with one of my guys, and we got the intel we're looking for.
We followed the money trail through a couple of shell corporations, and it all leads back to the same guy.
Who? Someone who wants to kill your takeover because he wants jailbait as much as you do, and somebody who wouldn't mind ruining you in the process.
I think I understand.
Are you okay?where are you? I'm walking into a meeting.
Uh, got to go.
I'll call you back.
What the hell was that? I thought you said I might feel a slight pinch! You said you wanted a brazilian.
I thought you meant coffee.
Okay, well, one more should do it.
No, no, no, no.
- Now, just remember, short, deep breaths and - wait, wait, wait.
How'd you get in here? The front door.
Although the badge helps, too.
What do you want from me? You can relax.
Walter storrs' widow confessed.
You're off the hook.
What?You're joking.
No, she said she didn't know about the affair, but your wife told us a very different story.
That's when mrs.
Storrs confessed -- to the poisoning, to everything.
Hell hath no fury, huh? You should thank your wife, Mr.
Walker.
Without her, we might be having a much different conversation.
Bribing a journalist to sink a deal? Terrence, you know that doesn't play well on the street.
Neither does diddling a tranny in a truck-stop bathroom.
So, we're at an impasse.
I guess we are.
Then it's cards-on-the-table time.
I want jailbait.
So do I.
You brought that tape? What are you proposing? It's like this.
I'll walk away from the deal, meaning jailbait's all yours under two conditions.
I'm listening.
One, you let me have that tape.
Easy enough.
And two? Stay away from her.
- Her? - Lisbeth.
Steer clear of lisbeth, and the company's all yours.
Sorry, you're joking.
Uh, listen, let me get this straight.
I understand why you want the tape.
But you would walk away from a company with a positive cash flow and a p/e ratio that would make most stock analysts' mouths water for a woman? Not just any woman.
So We have a deal? - James.
- Hey.
How long have you been here your office said you left three hours ago.
I don't know.
A while.
You heard the news, right? Mrs.
Storrs confessed.
You mind if I come in? Are you all right? Is everything okay at work? You told me it was a mistake.
But it wasn't a mistake at all, was it? At are you talking about? I overheard you earlier with that detective.
You loved him, stacey.
Now, that, james -- no, I-I-I I was nervous talking to him, and I was -- j-just stop.
No more lies, okay? I-I thought I could get past it.
I really did.
I wanted to, you know? I wanted to be that guy who comes home, who swallows his pride, who's there for his kids, but I can'T.
I just -- I just can't, because if you loved him, then you didn't love me.
And that's something i can't get past.
So, what are you saying? The last thing I ever wanted to.
I want a divorce.
- Bye.
- Bye.
I'll call you guys tonight, okay? And I'll see you at soccer tomorrow, right? Right.
Bye, dad.
You gonna be okay? Not a chance.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I just wanted to say I heard the deal fell through.
I'm sorry.
I know it meant a lot to you.
It's okay.
I got a tip from someone that jailbait wasn't as popular as I thought.
Had market research dig a little deeper.
Turns out whoever buys that company in for a real shock.
Well, good night, duncan.
- Oh, cam.
- Yeah? You did good today.
That's what business is all about -- instincts.
And you got them.
Crazy couple weeks, huh? Why, because you were named C.
E.
O.
Your marriage ended, and you narrowly averted being a murder suspect? Something like that.
- Let me ask you something.
- Yep? You think I can do it? Run a company, be a single dad? No, probably not.
Thanks.
I think you'll do great.
Right now it seems hard -- impossible, even -- but one day, you're gonna look back on all of this and thank stacey because you couldn't imagine your life any other way.
- And you're not just saying this to - - suck up to the boss? Oh, absolutely.
And also because I mean every word.
Good night, boss.
Okay, dash.
All right, I'll see you tonight, buddy.
I love you.
Okay, bye.
How the kids doing? Besides the tears and the accusations, pretty good, I think.
No te pr I remember how upset cam was when lisbeth and I split.
Now she'd be more upset if she found out we were back together.
I just thought I'd be like my parents -- married for 40 years.
You ever have a plan that just didn't work out? Yeah, it was called my 20s.
I told you, life is full of change.
Simple darwin.
If you can adapt, you can thrive.
If you need any help adapting, I'm free wednesdays and every other weekend.
Hey.
How'd everything go last night? It didn'T.
Had to postpone sex night.
That doesn't sound so bad.
No? Janelle's away at her yoga retreat through next week, so by the time she gets back, I'm gonna have to get waxed all over again.
Well, now that we're all here, I'm happy to announce, with an assist from our hairless friend here, I am now in possession of dontrelle's tape, which allows us to put this whole nasty little matter behind us once and for all.
Hear, hear.
You don't have to be so rough.
Whoa, what's this? Nothing.
Just an address book.
Address book, huh? You mean a list of all your customers.
Bet there are a few people who'd love to get their hands on this, huh? Come on.
Watch your head.
proudly presents
Or just very, very tired.
What kind of man would be so deceitful as to lie to the woman he's cheating on his wife with? What are you saying? You're gonna tell her about us? What are you doing here? Well, I came here to tell her.
And then we got to talking.
You hit it off with my wife? There are rumors that might interest your shareholders.
You got a knobber from a tranny? And what kind of journalist would I be if I didn't ask? Were you having an affair with my boss? Yes.
- He fired you? - No one knows yet.
It won't be official till tomorrow.
He came out of nowhere! My boss! You can forget 911.
Things are suddenly looking up for you, huh, james? Hey, sweetie.
No, we just took off.
I should be back in a few hours.
Of course I remember what tonight is.
And you know I would never miss - - fruit plate, sir? Sex night.
Yes, it's priority for me, too, hon.
I'm doing 600 miles an hour in a g5 -- practically the speed of sound.
Hold on.
I'll ask.
Hey.
Can this thing go any faster? Brody Johns,founder,alpha crisis management.
Oh, god! That was fantastic.
And that thing you did with your elbow -- That's sweet of you, karl.
But I really think we need to talk.
"Talk"? Okay, sure.
We can talk.
What's up? Actually, not here.
But I know the perfect place.
Mr.
Mixworthy, nice to see you again, you and yourmistress.
Karl Mixworthy,ceo,devotion pharmaceuticals.
So, how does it feel to be C.
E.
O.
? Great.
Running a multibillion-dollar conglomerate -- I like low-pressure jobs.
You're gonna have to talk to her sooner or later, you know.
Well, she slept with my boss, katie.
Well, look at the bright side.
He's dead, so at least you won't have to run into him in the men's room.
It just doesn't feel right when my job is less pressure than my marriage.
James Walker,ceo,amerimart industries We are on fire.
Our pending acquisition of jailbait cosmetics makes reveal the most potent force in the personal-grooming industry Even better news, I just received word that my profile will grace the november cover of entrepreneur monthly magazine.
We are on the top of our game.
Life can't get much better than this.
Hi, sweetie.
But it can certainly get worse.
Duncan Collinsworth,ceo,reveal cosmeties.
Big Shots Season 1 Episode 2 You're ending it? Look, it's just not right, karl.
Your wife's my new best friend.
Best friend? You've known her a week and a half.
But you know what? You're right.
- I am? - She is? Yes.
This is definit UhI-I-is there something wrong, marla? I guess just part of me thought that karl might actually put up a fight.
But now it's clear the kind of man karl is -- a man without the decency to fight for his own mistress! Well, I have to say, these sessions are becoming very confusing.
Brody: If I tell you guys something, do you promise not to laughtoo loudly? Last night was sex night.
Sex night? Yeah, me and janelle.
Every tuesday.
No matter how tired or busy we are, we make an appointment for sex.
Wendy and I used to have a sex night.
Then it becameaco night.
Wow, that's depressing.
How do you think I feel?I used to race home for nookie.
Now, just happy if she remembers the guacamole.
Anyway, so, janelle says she doesn't think sex night is special anymore.
She wants me to come up with some ideas to spice things up.
Don't look at me.
My sex night doesn't even involve other people.
Can I be honest? With sex tips like that, it's amazing either of you have issues with women.
Where the hell is duncan when you need him? Uhbrody? Here comes your female expert.
We need to talk.
Now, now, wait.
I don't understand.
That reporter is running the yonkers story? I thought we took care of that.
We did.
Except for one thing.
Tell him what you told me.
That night at the club when duncan bribed me to keep quiet about what happened with me and him - yeah? - Well, I kind of taped it.
He taped it.
He taped it! You taped it?! The reporter paid me to.
Said it could be a big story.
Unfortunately, the biggest thing in that story was your penis, which I'm still not quite sure how you didn't notice.
That reporter lied to me, said my profile was a puff piece, told me it was a dead end.
That's because she doesn't want you to stop it.
I feel terrible that I gave her the tape.
That's why I came back.
The guilt is killing me.
I can barely eat.
My work is suffering.
Your work is suffering? You're a prostitute.
What have I stumbled upon here, duncan? Meeting of your corporate board? Actually, it's a search party, terrence.
We're out here looking for your business ethics.
Dirtbag.
Ran into your ex-wife yesterday -- lisbeth.
Terrific woman, she is.
You're not her type.
Oh.
What is her type? - Me.
- Okay.
Well, always good seeing you, duncan.
I'll let you get back to your, umménagetrois.
Oh, he's cute.
Who's that? Terrence hill -- corporate raider with the conscience of an assassin.
He's a member here.
Hates duncan.
Really?Why? A few years back, I rear-ended his sister in the parking lot.
Never forgiven me.
Maybe that's because neither of you were in your cars at the time.
Look, you got a problem here, but don't worry, 'cause when guys like you have problems, they call guys like me.
Actually I may be able to fix this one all on my own.
Hello? Lori, hey.
Duncan collinsworth.
How's my favorite reporter doing? I was wondering if I could bend your ear when you get a minute.
On the record, of course.
Look, you are not the first guy who's been cheated on, you know? It's 2007.
It's a lot more common than you think.
- Wait, you never - - me? No, not my style.
- When I'm unhappy in a relationship, I just - end it.
No.
No, I accrazy enough so they do.
But, I mean, it's the same general idea.
It's just that I never thought I wouldn't know how to face my own wife.
The truth is, I don't even know where to start.
You could start by talking to her.
Stacey: Or maybe you could just start by listening.
Hi, honey.
Sorry I'm late.
I know dinner's usually at 7:00.
Wendy? Hello? Oh.
I, uh didn't know you had, uh Company.
All right, sweetie.
I'll be right back, okay? What's going on here? Why is she crying? Marla and her boyfriend broke up yesterday.
Apparently, he didn't even put up a fight.
Said he was relieved.
Boyfriend.
I didn't even know she was dating anyone.
I didn't, either.
Truth is, I think he was married.
M-married? Oh, really? Did she mention a name? - Kyle.
- Kyle? Yes, karl.
Kyle.
Anyway, this kyle fellow sounds like a real operator, which is ironic, because marla says he's quite unappealing physically.
Homely, even.
guess Right.
Well I should wash up for dinner.
Oh, about that, marla's been in a state all afternoon, and I haven't had a moment to cook.
But there's some cold chicken in the fridge if you're hungry.
See?It's been like this all afternoon.
You'll excuse me.
You're late.
Sweet duncan, it's nice to know you don't trust just anybody to get your latte.
Cam, I can't have this.
Jailbait cosmetics is the hottest takeover target in town.
Every corp with fresh cash is eyeing it.
It's all hands on deck here, including yours.
Yeah, about that -- jailbait -- I hate to burst your bubble, duncan, but their products aren't exactly cutting-edge.
None of the girls in my dorm uld touch their stuff.
Thanks.
I'll be sure to inform the board that my daughter doesn't approve of the deal.
But until then, I'll need copies of the disclosure documents distributed A.
S.
A.
P.
No problem -- how long could it take to copy a little paperwork? I don't know.
You tell me.
It's 20 years, stacey.
20 years.
Three cities, two kids.
And after all that, this is how you repay me? By sleeping with my boss? I told you it was a mistake, and that's all it was.
- Did you love him? - No.
God, no.
- Then, how could you - - I don't know.
I don't know.
Maybe I was bored.
Maybe I was scared that you were.
That at any moment, I'd become one of these "first wives of firmwood" whose husbands traded them in for a newer model.
But I'm here right now because I miss you so much.
The kids miss you.
We want you to come home.
You don't think I want to be home? You don't think I'd rather be with you guys than sitting in my furnished room at the club watching the mets highlights? - But what you did - - what I did was a mistake, james.
You're the only man that I've loved that I've ever loved my whole life.
And I'm asking you not to make the same mistake I did by risking the next 20 years because you forgot even for a second w wonderful the last 20 years have been.
You're going home? Yep.
Tonight after work.
I told stacey I'd give her another chance.
I didn't see that one coming.
I can't be that guy who sees his kids on the weekends or just walks away from the marriage 'cause it's not perfect anymore.
You're doing the right thing.
Wife, kids -- no self-respecting man can casually walk away from that.
What?Lisbeth changed the locks.
I had no choice.
Oh, and how is operation: Mistress removal going? Uh, not too well, but I'm taking wendy to dinner tonight, some quality time alone together.
It's impressive, karl.
The first man in history actually had to break up his wife and girlfriend.
You see, james?You're not alone.
Relationships are full of pain and problems.
That's why you really need to work on the pep talk.
Things change.
Lisbeth and i went through a divorce, and now the chemistry -- mmm -- is better than ever.
Took an affair with a lunatic to get me to appreciate my wife.
Even good relationships change.
I mean, look at janelle and I.
When we first met, I did everything for her.
You still do everything for her.
Yeah, but now I don't fight it.
I should run.
I don't want to be late for my date.
With who?Lisbeth? The reporter that's doing the profile on him.
I figure I'd appeal to her face-to-face, get her to see the real duncan collinsworth.
This doesn't go well, does it? Not even a little bit.
Daddy!Daddy, you're home! Hey!Come here.
Oh, god, I missed you guys.
How was your trip?Was it fun? Uhyeah.
Yeah, it was fun.
Well, not as much fun as coming home.
Hey, kids, go inside and get daddy what you made for him.
Remember? - Hi.
- Hi.
Never been so nervous about coming home from work before.
Well, I've never been so nervous that you wouldn'T.
Come inside.
Mr.
Walker.
- Yes.
Can I help you? - Hi.
Reuben mays, harrison police.
I'm here to ask you a few questions about the death of walter storrs, your former boss.
"Questions"?Heas hit by a golf cart.
His death was an accident.
Actuly, we've classified it as murder.
Now, if I might have a moment of your time the golf cart was an accident, Mr.
Walker, but the autopsy results showed trace amounts of a drug called arsenic trioxide in his system.
Someone tried to poison him? Oh, they did more than just try.
The poison weakened his heart.
Otherwise he would have survived the impact of the golf cart.
It looks like your former boss had enemies.
Enemielike who? Oh, I don'know, like the husband of the woman he was sleeping with.
All right, wait a second.
First of all, I didn't know about the affair until after he died, okay? And second of all, I'm the one who tried to save walter's life.
And third, after all that, you're the guy that got his job.
What -- what are you saying? Are you implying that I killed him for his job? For god's sakes, I've been with amerimart since business school.
Ied tt job,detective.
I'm sure you did.
The only question is, how? When i asked you to dinner, I really did mean dinner.
And when I asked for seconds, it had nothing to do with food.
Leaving already? I've got work to do.
Your profile isn't gonna write itself.
About that I didn't want to bring it up over dinner, but now that we know each other better Maybe there's no need to mention certain things.
Like certain truck-stop dalliances with 6-foot pre-op transsexuals? That'd be the one.
You're cute, duncan.
Cute and predictable.
T I'm running your profilein full.
No, no.
No, y-y-you don't want to do that.
Hey, look!What did you think? One roll in the hay with duncan collinsworth and you'd rid me of all my journalistic integrity? Listen, this is my career here.
Do you know what will happen if this story goes public? Yes.
I'll get a raise, maybe a book deal.
I-I-I meant to mE.
Good night, duncan.
Thanks for dinner.
Hi.
What's wrong?Lovers' quarrel? Saw her I.
D.
?Realized she was legal? What are you doing here? The acquisition docs, remember? In your hands?A.
S.
A.
P.
? Fine.
Just bring them inside.
By the way, I'm an adult.
Adults are allowed to have houseguests.
Of course.
Just curious if you charge by overnight or hourly rates.
Should have seen her.
She flew out of my apartment like she was double-parked.
Wow!That's your move.
I know.
I mean, what kind of world do we live in where women are more like men than we are? It's sad.
Don't worry.
We'll work this out.
We will do whatever is necessary to make sure that that story never hits the press.
We're gonna get that tape.
And besides, life could always get worse.
How? Well, take me, for instance.
Janelle decided how she wanted to spice up sex night.
She wants me to wax my boys.
Your boys? Yeah, my boys -- down below, round and rounder.
Oh, your boys.
What'd you say? Well, I already waxed my back for her birthday, so I told her no.
The back is one thing, but the nuggets? That's a whole new deal.
First, they beat us at loveless sex.
Now they want us to go hairless for them.
At this rate, in 20 years, we'll be lining up for pap smears.
James, what the hell are you doing? I need your help.
Duncan: They're classifying it as a murder? And I thought I had problems.
It wasn't you who poisoned him.
That's what's important.
It wasn't you, right?I did two semesters of law school, so it would just be between us.
Of course it wasn't me.
The problem is, I'm not sure the cops feel the same way.
Aw, come on.
That's crazy.
If you really look at it, I have motive.
That guy was sleeping with your wife.
Right.
And you got his job.
Yeah, and not only that, walter storrs fired me right before he died.
- If the cops knew that - you didn't tell them that, did you? Of course not.
I haven't told anyone except for you guys.
They're just fishing, trying to see how you react.
So keep your mouth shut, and this will all blow over.
Amazing.
Murder, transsexuals -- and janelle considers you guys my classy friends.
Sweetheart, I'm home! Wendy, I'm here! - Honey? - Wendy? I'm over here.
you two,what's going on.
I'm here to take you to dinner.
All set to go.
Car's still running.
And I'm here for our plans.
You remember, right? Silly me.
I've double-booked.
Sweetie, it's a four-star restaurant.
D to pull all sorts of strings to get us in.
But it's our favorite movie.
And I had to go to three video stores to find it.
It's a two-day rental.
You understand, karl.
We can go out to eat next week, okay? Actually, the truth is, I was hoping to spend some quality time alone together and really reconnect.
Marla loves this part.
We can talk later, okay, karl? Okay, so, what's wrong? Lisbeth.
Hey.
This is a surprise.
What makes you think something's wrong? Oh, I don't know.
Drinking alone might be the first clue.
Oh.
Just work stuff, you know? The acquisition and everything.
Are you eating? Or are you still on an all-vodka diet? I'm fine.
Justwondering.
About what? When it ends.
How much longer can I stay on top? Come on, duncan.
Self-pity doesn't suit you.
You know that.
Besides, they've been trying to knock you off for years.
And as far as I can tell, you're only getting better with age.
So what makes you think they'll be able to do it now? Sometimes I wonder why we ever broke up.
I'll forward you a copy of the deposition.
I have dinner plans inside, and my date's gonna be here any minute, so who is he?No.
Let me guess.
The cool single dad on your block? No, the guy in town with the schnauzer and the fanny pack? Actually, it's the englishman with the aston martin and incredibly bad timing.
Apologies if I'm early.
No, actually, you're right on time.
Uh, I just bumped into duncan.
Well, don't let me keep you.
Enjoy your dinner.
Little tip -- the salmon's her favorite.
Yes, she ordered that on oursecond date.
Always good to see you, duncan.
Shall we? Hope to run into you again soon.
Me too.
With my car.
She's done nothing wrong.
Lisbeth's a free agent.
She can date anyone she wants.
I know, but terrence? He's handsome, charming, smart, if you're into that sort of thing, and he can buy and sell all of us.
If it doesn't work out, maybe u can date him.
Oh, I forgot to tell you.
Janelle upped the ante.
If I get my boys waxed, she bumps sex night to twice a week.
And you're considering it? I have to.
Do you know what guaranteed biweekly sex means to a married man? That he's having an affair? Okay.
Remind me again how we're gonna get this tape.
By relaxing and trusting me.
Okay, any other options? How you doing?You're waiting for me.
- Brody johns? - In the flesh.
- Wait right here.
- Thanks.
What's going on? Calling in a favor.
Guy who owns the building had a little trouble.
I helped him through it.
How? I convinced his wife that the woman she found him in bed with really was a sleep consultant, and I convinced the woman he was in bed with not to tell the wife oerwise.
- Thank you.
- You bet.
Now listen closely.
Lori's at work all day.
The housekeeper doesn't arrive till 2:00, so you just stand watch out front, and I will find the tape.
You sure about this?It doesn't seem very - - what's the word? - Legal.
Listen, when your friend's career hangs in the balance because he tried to bribe a tranny who gave him a knobber at a yonkers rest stop legal's the least of our concerns.
Good point.
Rumor is they're questioning everyone, including storrs' widow.
But let's be honest -- walter storrs wasn't exactly Mr.
Popularity.
Might be quicker to actually round up the people who liked him.
Hey, don't let that cop scare you.
Everyone knows walter loved Y.
Affair aside, you were his right-hand man.
He was grooming you to take over.
It's obvious.
Right.
Of course.
And, by the way, how's everything on the home front? Great.
Now say it like you mean it.
Look, you love her, and that's what's important.
You don't have to forgive her overnight.
Now get back to work before your professional life matches your personal one.
See you later, killer.
How's it going in there? Still looking.
I haven't found it yet.
Hurry up! Aw, she's got a cool cd collection, though.
Duncan? Hey!Lori! What are you doing here? I was just passing by, thought I'd take a chance.
A chance.
At what? Convincing me not to run your story? No, a chance that you'd accept my apology for my behavior the other night, which was awful, by the way.
I was hoping to buy you a cup of coffee so we could talk.
Great.
Let me just grab my things.
Why don't you wait inside? No, no.
This place closes like right now.
Don't be silly.
It'll only take a moment.
Nice place.
What's wrong? You seem so nervous.
I am.
Because we had a connection the other night, and I trieto use it to get you to kill your story, and that was so wrong.
Look, it's understandable.
No, what it is is unforgivable.
Just when I thought I knew you.
You're a complex man, aren't you? Only on the inside.
U know, I don't even drink coffee, and the other night wasn'T all bad, was it? It certainly had its moments.
Why don't I remind you of my favorite one? Well, to be honest, I kind of like this one, too.
Ah, you feel so good.
Thank yoU.
I moisturized.
w we live in the same house, and we sleep in the same bed, but it's like we're strangers now.
And I see how much fun she has with marla, and, well, I'm not afraid to say it, doctor, but I miss my own wife.
Well, I have to say, karl, these emotions are surprisingly human.
Is there anything you'd like to say, wendy? Marla's very possessive.
Possessive?I need the jaws of life to separate you two.
Karl and marla are just like oil and water, but I know that if karl took the time to get to know her, he would feel the same way about her that I do.
Well, uh how do you propose to do that? Actually, I did have one idea.
It's a little unorthodox, but it might just work.
So, where should we start, doctor? There you go.
- Bye, duncan.
- Bye.
I'll call you.
Ew!Are you kidding me?! I panicked.
I didn't know what else to do.
So you slept with her with me in the room? I was trying to distract her so you could get out of the apartment.
And go right to therapy.
More importantly, did you get the tape? No, she must have it somewhere else, but I did find these.
What? Deposit slip large cash payments were made into her account over the last couple of weeks, and it's a lot more money than a reporter would ever make.
Wait a second.
Someone's paying her to run the tranny story? Possibly.
We'll just follow the money trail.
See where it leads.
And could you please stop looking at me? I really need the memory of this to fade naturally.
What do you want? Money? What are you talking about, karl? What's it going to take to get you out of my life and, more importantly, out of my house? I don't want your money, karl.
A friend like wendy is priceless.
Listen to me -- I want my wife back.
And if I have to, I'll tell her about us.
You wouldn't dare.
I mean, what's the worst she's gonndo? Divorce me and take half my assets? But you?She'll never forgive you.
And where will you ever find another friend who will sit through "love affair"? Let's not be rash.
Neither of us want to hurt her, and neither of us want to give her up, so we just need to figure out something that works for both of us.
Actually, I may have an idea.
So, you get her every wednesday night and every other weekend.
And what about jewish holidays? I get those, but I'll tell you what.
I can give you an overnight on good friday.
How's that sound? Throw in presidents' day and you've got aeal.
Deal.
Was he planning on leaving his wife for you? He talked about it.
He filed for divorce the day before he died.
You must have known that.
Yeah.
As soon as his wife found out about us, he decided to file.
Mrs.
Storrs told us that she didn't know about the affair.
That's not what walter said.
Walter said she was quite upset when she found out.
Just one more question, mrs.
Walker.
Were you gonna leave your husband for walter storrs? Mrs.
Walker.
I told you.
I hadn't decided that.
But I only know that I loved him.
Com so, I just got off the phone with one of my guys, and we got the intel we're looking for.
We followed the money trail through a couple of shell corporations, and it all leads back to the same guy.
Who? Someone who wants to kill your takeover because he wants jailbait as much as you do, and somebody who wouldn't mind ruining you in the process.
I think I understand.
Are you okay?where are you? I'm walking into a meeting.
Uh, got to go.
I'll call you back.
What the hell was that? I thought you said I might feel a slight pinch! You said you wanted a brazilian.
I thought you meant coffee.
Okay, well, one more should do it.
No, no, no, no.
- Now, just remember, short, deep breaths and - wait, wait, wait.
How'd you get in here? The front door.
Although the badge helps, too.
What do you want from me? You can relax.
Walter storrs' widow confessed.
You're off the hook.
What?You're joking.
No, she said she didn't know about the affair, but your wife told us a very different story.
That's when mrs.
Storrs confessed -- to the poisoning, to everything.
Hell hath no fury, huh? You should thank your wife, Mr.
Walker.
Without her, we might be having a much different conversation.
Bribing a journalist to sink a deal? Terrence, you know that doesn't play well on the street.
Neither does diddling a tranny in a truck-stop bathroom.
So, we're at an impasse.
I guess we are.
Then it's cards-on-the-table time.
I want jailbait.
So do I.
You brought that tape? What are you proposing? It's like this.
I'll walk away from the deal, meaning jailbait's all yours under two conditions.
I'm listening.
One, you let me have that tape.
Easy enough.
And two? Stay away from her.
- Her? - Lisbeth.
Steer clear of lisbeth, and the company's all yours.
Sorry, you're joking.
Uh, listen, let me get this straight.
I understand why you want the tape.
But you would walk away from a company with a positive cash flow and a p/e ratio that would make most stock analysts' mouths water for a woman? Not just any woman.
So We have a deal? - James.
- Hey.
How long have you been here your office said you left three hours ago.
I don't know.
A while.
You heard the news, right? Mrs.
Storrs confessed.
You mind if I come in? Are you all right? Is everything okay at work? You told me it was a mistake.
But it wasn't a mistake at all, was it? At are you talking about? I overheard you earlier with that detective.
You loved him, stacey.
Now, that, james -- no, I-I-I I was nervous talking to him, and I was -- j-just stop.
No more lies, okay? I-I thought I could get past it.
I really did.
I wanted to, you know? I wanted to be that guy who comes home, who swallows his pride, who's there for his kids, but I can'T.
I just -- I just can't, because if you loved him, then you didn't love me.
And that's something i can't get past.
So, what are you saying? The last thing I ever wanted to.
I want a divorce.
- Bye.
- Bye.
I'll call you guys tonight, okay? And I'll see you at soccer tomorrow, right? Right.
Bye, dad.
You gonna be okay? Not a chance.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I just wanted to say I heard the deal fell through.
I'm sorry.
I know it meant a lot to you.
It's okay.
I got a tip from someone that jailbait wasn't as popular as I thought.
Had market research dig a little deeper.
Turns out whoever buys that company in for a real shock.
Well, good night, duncan.
- Oh, cam.
- Yeah? You did good today.
That's what business is all about -- instincts.
And you got them.
Crazy couple weeks, huh? Why, because you were named C.
E.
O.
Your marriage ended, and you narrowly averted being a murder suspect? Something like that.
- Let me ask you something.
- Yep? You think I can do it? Run a company, be a single dad? No, probably not.
Thanks.
I think you'll do great.
Right now it seems hard -- impossible, even -- but one day, you're gonna look back on all of this and thank stacey because you couldn't imagine your life any other way.
- And you're not just saying this to - - suck up to the boss? Oh, absolutely.
And also because I mean every word.
Good night, boss.
Okay, dash.
All right, I'll see you tonight, buddy.
I love you.
Okay, bye.
How the kids doing? Besides the tears and the accusations, pretty good, I think.
No te pr I remember how upset cam was when lisbeth and I split.
Now she'd be more upset if she found out we were back together.
I just thought I'd be like my parents -- married for 40 years.
You ever have a plan that just didn't work out? Yeah, it was called my 20s.
I told you, life is full of change.
Simple darwin.
If you can adapt, you can thrive.
If you need any help adapting, I'm free wednesdays and every other weekend.
Hey.
How'd everything go last night? It didn'T.
Had to postpone sex night.
That doesn't sound so bad.
No? Janelle's away at her yoga retreat through next week, so by the time she gets back, I'm gonna have to get waxed all over again.
Well, now that we're all here, I'm happy to announce, with an assist from our hairless friend here, I am now in possession of dontrelle's tape, which allows us to put this whole nasty little matter behind us once and for all.
Hear, hear.
You don't have to be so rough.
Whoa, what's this? Nothing.
Just an address book.
Address book, huh? You mean a list of all your customers.
Bet there are a few people who'd love to get their hands on this, huh? Come on.
Watch your head.
proudly presents