Billions (2016) s05e11 Episode Script

Victory Smoke

1 [CHUCK.]
Previously on Billions.
You're still interested in a bank charter, right? - You know I am.
- He has a new toy, a bank.
And nothing to stop him from making mistakes.
I'm the bait.
And the bank is the trap.
How are we taking down Bobby Axelrod? Axe used his black magic to get my commission squashed.
Why'd you do it? Why'd you fuck him up like that? I've come to believe that you require oversight.
Charles Rhodes Senior has been selected.
[CHUCK.]
You're the donor? My father is owned by him now.
[AXE.]
We need some fucking deposits.
There is cannabis money.
- Send me everything you have on it.
- Do you want to be done? Then let's be done.
Pay me off in the next 48 hours.
I need you to buy out my shares of Mase Carbon today.
Welcome to my home.
A Jeffersonian dinner.
- We did it.
- That argument was a nice touch.
My two enemies have linked up.
Find out which cannabis companies Mike Prince is pursuing.
Whatever he's going after, I wanna take it.
I was trying to ruin Tanner in your eyes.
Because I couldn't stand you being with him or anyone.
I feel the same things when I look at you.
["WILD HORSES" BY ROLLING STONES PLAYING.]
Childhood living [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS.]
Go fuck yourself! Huh? [HARD BOB.]
That's what he said.
- Who? - Rhodes Senior, the leathery old bastard.
Is Axe about or is he still down with the 'Vid? He's not here.
Raise him.
[PHONE RINGS.]
There's an issue.
You're aware the bank's registered as a Delaware corp, so the state AG has say, and they've still got us in a probationary headlock.
Prevents us from taking on a large concentrated depositor such as - The cannabis business.
- Right.
Well, we need that fucking money.
Bank's dead without it.
A thought occurs.
Isn't this what bankruptcy is for? Stick the bad shit on the bank's balance sheet and declare.
Go back to Axe Cap, free and easy, the way it was.
Nah, we burned the boats.
New structure is asset management runs through the bank.
It fails, we got a failed investment arm.
Investors gone.
Fuck! Which is why we so deliberately chose our special trustee for just such a moment as this, to recommend us in his report, only to be told "Go fuck yourself.
" Uh, excuse the mouth, ma'am.
Not at all, Hard Bob.
The old man figured out he had the leverage and he figured he'd use it.
Why don't I go and talk to him? See if I can remind him of what the right thing is and to fucking do it.
[KNOCK AT DOOR.]
You look good.
I should.
Got the old ashes hauled this morning.
Oh, okay.
Got laid is what I mean.
Yeah, copy on that.
Test flight.
Went fine, if not quite as vigorous a session as I might like, but building to it, building to it.
- Tonight, Roxanne is gonna - That's far too much info for a former daughter-in-law.
- We're also coworkers.
- Even worse.
And this renewed vitality is all thanks to Axe, as I imagine you are here to remind me.
Who'd think you need reminding? I know you're grateful.
I'm here to talk specifics about your mission.
You guys need me to testify to the Delaware State AG on Axe's behalf about his character and the robust ethics on display at the bank and all that.
Correct.
The problem is I would be lying.
Lying is no more a problem for you than shooting free throws was for Steve Nash.
You're excellent at it.
It's what sets you apart from everyone else.
What if I simply don't feel like it? Just walk away from the game, much as Mr.
Nash did.
Your feelings have nothing to do with repaying your debt.
[CHUCKLES.]
I'm why the damn bank exists.
So I'd say I've already repaid my life debt to Axe with far more than a thank-you.
Bullshit.
We both know you'll be carrying that obligation around as long as that kidney's filtering.
I got a new lease on life.
I don't want to spend it in prison.
You also don't want to spend it on the sidelines.
That's why you hightailed it over to Chuck's at Bobby's behest.
We both know you have zero problem being on his team.
You just see an angle.
Like the Schmatta kid himself.
So I have to play it.
What do you want? I want to be 20 years younger.
I'll take money and power.
I want a nugget of his cannabis concession.
He's never giving you ownership, you know that.
Can we just skip the middle stages of this negotiation, please? Meaningful profit share.
But I'll-I'll be honest with you.
I feel less good about all this now.
And that's not posturing.
It's one thing to go against your own son.
But when it's with his ex, and mortal enemy Well, knowing you as I do, I imagine when I get you your profit share, this goes away.
Yeah.
Knowing me as you do, I'd think so too.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES.]
Welcome to New York.
Trip okay? Other than having to lie to our friends about how we got here.
I don't anymore.
The thing is when we were in high school, I was embarrassed to fly private too.
Instead of lying about flying private just bring your friends with you.
- Stop and pick them up on the way.
- I'd prefer to do the other thing, fly JetBlue.
You think you do.
Enough of our crap, Dad.
How you hanging in after that massacre on TV? Believe me, I'm fine.
Business is sharp elbows.
- I'm used to it.
- We're sure that's not really the way that it happened.
I talk about me and my issues with the folks here all day long.
Let's talk about the two of you.
Can't beat you at your game, so, sure.
This summer, you guys should do a whole thing with your people.
Start off at our place at Ile de Ré for a few weeks, trek through Europe.
Guess we'll skip Copenhagen, huh? [CHUCKLES.]
Yeah, yeah, cross it off.
We want to work.
We're ready.
Overrated.
You'll get there.
We've been feeling like it's time to roll up the sleeves.
Yeah.
All my people, the ones you'd have me bring over there like we're on Bling Empire are gonna have sick internships and gigs.
And then they'll all have jobs locked in if they aren't doing grad school.
Everyone from B school has stuff locked in too.
I don't regret much.
But I regret not getting to just live a little when I was young.
I couldn't afford to.
I I had to start.
You don't.
We're gonna fall behind.
- Who're you gonna fall behind? - Our whole cohort, like moving in step with them, ahead of them.
It's not a race like that.
He still doesn't understand what we've been robbed of.
- [SCOFFS.]
- Robbed? Yeah, of failing, of advancing on our own because we have to.
You got to do a thing by yourself.
We'll always be Mike Prince's daughters.
Yes.
Someone will always say that garbage.
- You gotta tune it out.
- Hard to do when it's your own voice saying it.
- [SIGHS.]
- It's not even about if having money makes things easier.
It's just putting something on the line for real.
And you were robbed of that? Yeah, we were.
There's such a safe landing for us, no matter what.
We might as well try.
But also whatever jobs we get, people will think it's because of you anyway.
That's true.
At first.
But hey, if you want a chance to fail - We don't plan to fail.
- Fine.
[SCOFFS.]
If you want a chance to succeed, help me with Hypercube.
- Your digital banking startup? - That's right.
We need to onboard a major depositor client.
Wait.
Really? Weed? Lawful weed.
Business and financial services for the legal cannabis industry.
The woman who runs this company, getting her to jump on board will take insight, enthusiasm, an understanding of the space, intelligence.
In a word, youth.
Yours.
You want to take a meeting? Win her over? Scooter will supervise at first, but you could be the client-facing piece in this space.
- In.
- Oh yeah, fully.
And if it works out, can we stay involved? [CHUCKLES.]
Try to close first.
You don't have to worry about the rest now.
Study up.
[LIZ.]
Okay, wow, this is very interesting.
[GAIL.]
Yeah, worth a shot.
Dad, this is legit.
[CONVERSATION CONTINUES FAINTLY.]
That looks exquisite on you.
Looks like Zales in a push-up bra.
I want the 600-karat black opal, the uncut gem shit.
What do you got? I may have something in my other case.
Are we looking for an engagement? Does Superman take to the air because he needs to be in Chicago for a convention? He flies because he can.
This is that.
Are you sure you're ready? "I'm ready for anything" is basically my first, middle and last name.
Even meeting my father? Most guys don't want to.
Right.
The dad dinner.
Sure.
I'll look him in the eye, give him a firm handshake, and assure him my intentions are honourable.
He'll see right through that act.
He's a lawyer, so he's spent his life slicing through bullshit artists.
- Hmm.
- He can look at people and know what's really inside of them.
He's self-made.
Tough.
Chuck Norris tough or Guido the killer pimp? See, he'll get that reference, probably, and know if it's good.
So I earn his respect by going toe to toe.
- Like a fighter.
- No, kiss his ass.
- But do it well.
- Ah.
Trombone blown, Tom Byron-style.
You got it.
Another reference I don't The important thing is he will.
Pigeon blood ruby.
That's a hell of a stone.
Keep it on ice.
I'll call you back for it.
After I succeed with Big Daddy.
[CHELZ CHUCKLES.]
There's the precedent.
That's one way to go.
It's your call.
Yeah.
Wow.
This is why we got into it, no? To argue before those nine robes? Even I can't be blasé about my first Supreme Court brief.
- Hmm.
- Though it's tempered by the fact that we're not really trying a case that might change the world but merely baiting a hook.
The thing about arguments before SCOTUS is they are never about what they're purported to be about.
- Hmm.
- Neither are the opinions or dissents, but everyone just presses forward.
As you are doing, Ms.
Sacker, impressively.
Oh, I'm gonna sell it because I believe it.
And it will be in the record.
Solicitor General DeGiulio shall be duly impressed.
And soon enough it really will be you at the lectern.
[ELEVATOR BELL RINGS.]
Are those them? [EXHALES.]
These.
.
are the Glengarry leads.
But do not try to steal them.
They will be handed out to closers, which, unlike Dave Moss and Charlie Levine, you will be because Axe is.
Those are the Auerbachs, aren't they? Axe used to talk about bringing them out for a huge win.
They are indeed.
- What's a? - Red Auerbach, Tuk.
Old-time Boston Celtics head coach and then GM and You can't work here and not know this stuff.
I've told you before.
Ask me anything about wrestling.
The NWA, AWA, WWWF.
The Territories? I've got it.
Even know who the Third Executioner was.
I'm just not up on old-time basketball yet.
Well, these cigars were very fucking significant.
They were and are.
Red Auerbach's Punch cigars.
After bringing nine titles to the city of Boston, he could smoke wherever he damn pleased.
But his favourite place was on the bench on the parquet of the old Boston Garden when victory was assured.
Give me one of those, I'll light it up right here, deal with the smoke alarms and fines later.
We'll smoke them when Red did: The moment victory is in hand, when our bank is solvent, not when the game is still in doubt.
We really didn't have to do it like this.
I would have wired it.
Sometimes auspicious beginnings and auspicious endings need to be done in person.
You wanted me to have to hand you 25 million.
Like this.
I guess I just wanted to see what it would be like to hold this much at once.
Perhaps see if anything rushed through me.
But, uh No, just sadness.
And a cold certainty that none of this ever had to happen.
There we agree.
So you still get a rush from the money alone? Don't ask me those ki I'm gonna head out.
And like that, lines are drawn.
No, tattooed, permanently.
Some of your money to me.
The rest of you to him.
Congratulations, then, are in order, to you.
For orchestrating it all.
Since the moment you set your sights on Axe five years ago, you have orchestrated a perfect plan to impel us together, which makes no sense.
Unless someone knows you, which I have.
Goodbye.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES.]
[EXHALES.]
I'm hearing rumblings that Solicitor General DeGiulio is awaiting a brief from the NY AG.
Once he has it, he officially asks the Supreme Court to grant cert in a financial services case which would clear the way for processing cannabis money.
I don't see SCOTUS saying no.
Looks like your read on Chuck's plan was center mass.
Track this brief.
Use Hall.
Make sure it says what we need it to say.
I know you're anxious.
But if you act and bank this money before cert is granted, and we can argue a coming change, you'll be whacked with civil charges.
You could get your charter stripped.
Which is why we have to act when it goes in, but right at that moment.
Prince has made the same determination.
We gotta vault over him.
Axe, seems we have news.
Tell me more about this company Prince is targeting.
Called FYC, Fine Young Cannabis.
CEO is Dawn Winslow, former music producer.
She got outta that to pursue her true love.
Now her company is a market leader, one point six bil in revenue last year alone.
[HARD BOB.]
Axe, I gotta say, being too early is as bad as being too late.
In this case worse.
If you onboard this cash too quick, you'll get slapped with civil penalties.
Thanks, Hard Bob.
I already got that from my actual lawyer.
And what do we got to land FYC? No, she's not gonna sign on for free checking.
I hate to say it, but you need to outbid him.
Banks are basically paying zero interest right now.
We go the other way I don't like overpaying.
Ever.
But as a new bank, setting up a new desperate precedent like this is suicide.
I know how Prince plans to lock up FYC: - with his daughters.
- Cagey move.
Good for branding and the CEO Winslow gets to look like she's mentoring the next gen.
- Total bullshit, but cagey.
- [WAGS.]
What's our counter? What do we know about Winslow's leaks? Not fucking much.
She's refusing to speak with anyone from Axe Bank.
- Including? - Including Axe.
Lady says she's entering into an exclusive negotiating period with Prince.
Lady says that means something.
It means you all do better.
We can't stop Prince from having his meeting with her, or from agreeing to a deal in principle, even.
We gotta wedge in there in the moments right before closing.
But Chieftain, if she won't even meet with you She doesn't have a deal to shop yet.
By the time she does, we need to top her.
But believe me, before she locks it in, she's gonna have one last look at what's out there.
It's human nature.
And I'll be what she's starin' at.
You don't look like the man I know you to be.
And what man do you think that is? One on the verge of beating Bobby Axelrod and thumping his chest in triumph.
What, did the meeting with Winslow fall through? Meeting's lined up, but I'm not.
I'm not sure I can let it happen.
I've been thinking we've done enough, and Axe can cruise on in there and take it.
No, no, no.
We need the rabbit zipping around the rail, so the greyhound chases it headlong.
- You're the rabbit.
- Mm-hm.
Without you, maybe he stops and thinks about it instead of lunging.
[EXHALES.]
You don't know if you can walk your daughters through the door.
Deploy them like that.
That's what this is.
[SIGHS.]
Look, I get it.
I'm living it with my old man.
It's a little different.
He's hardly an innocent.
True.
But you can't really say you're playing unless you're willing to put your highest-value pieces - on the board.
- They're not pieces.
They're my children.
My first charge in this world is to protect them, not set them off like flashbang grenades.
You are protecting them.
Better, you're arming them to protect themselves.
Yes, a consequence of this action might be that they become wary, less open.
That may be of some benefit in business.
But I'm not doing this as a teaching tool.
I'm doing it for my own aims and that is too bitter a lesson.
[WHISPERS.]
You can't safeguard your kids from pain.
But you can protect them from evil.
And we both know that's what Axe is.
And that's what a world is that bows before him.
They're how he knows you're serious.
And that it hurts you to use them that's why you're the man you are.
Don't do it.
Godammit! Diego is fired.
He only tipped me off because I told him I was worried about you taking the car out while still recovering.
He cares about your well-being, as do I.
Touching, but I'm fit as Charles Atlas in '53.
Well, then do to Axe and company what Mr.
Atlas would do a ThighMaster.
Squeeze him.
Atlas, good as he was, is dead, and so is any chance of me doing what you want.
Besides, his gag was isometrics, and it was that pretty blonde gal, Suzanne Somers, who made with the ThighMaster.
No matter.
I'm here to warn you.
Don't be their rubber stamp.
Take your duties more seriously than that.
I know my duty.
Always have.
That's why you had food in your belly and a roof over your head and monogrammed boxer shorts in your closet.
I will advise with discretion - and discernment.
- [SCOFFS.]
Now whether it's what you want or not isn't my problem.
You're so desperate to stay relevant, to stay in the game.
You can't see that the game has passed you by Willie Mays in center field for the Mets, misunderstanding the dewy eyes in the crowd for love.
[LAUGHS.]
Oh, sonny boy.
You just never understood me or the Say Hey Kid.
You play until your feet break.
And they carry you off the field in a box.
And if that's not convenient for you, like Billy Joe Royal sang, "I never promised you a rose garden.
" [HORN HONKS.]
[MAN.]
Sir.
[REVS ENGINE.]
[TIRES SQUEAL.]
[MUFFLED CONVERSATION.]
Sorry, I'll be right back.
Next generation's bright.
The girls are tearin' it up.
They prepped their pitch like Russian gymnasts.
And Winslow? She's melting like a pad of butter on a short stack.
I'll go get into final terms for onboarding her company's cash.
Good.
And if the account is seized, then the bank is liable [PHONE BUZZES.]
for not knowing which money came from where.
He'll do it.
[PRINCE.]
How do you know? I told him not to.
Then I'm sorry.
And well done.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION.]
[SIGHS.]
Okay.
Doing this in person, nice and official.
So do you want to report what Delaware banking laws Axe Bank has violated? Or should I just read from the list and you nod and sign? Nothing to report.
So he hasn't violated any laws? None that I'm aware of.
No regulations on probationary terms? Has he painted outside the lines? On the contrary, noses are clean.
I gotta say I'm I'm a little confused.
I'm the pin boy here.
They're all set up for you to knock them down, at which point your son moves in, we sweep them up together as we prosecute jointly.
I can't report what hasn't happened regardless of my son's plans.
I can only discharge my duty as I see fit.
You understand that if this goes to prosecution, you are wrapping yourself right up in it? Gotcha.
And my formal recommendation is, lift the probationary terms.
[SIGHS.]
I'm not gonna pretend that I'm not confused, but I've done my part.
I look forward to being clear of your fucked-up family.
Okay.
Axe Bank has passed its probation.
[EXHALES.]
This bottle of d'Yquem Axe wanted you to enjoy is from the year you were born.
These grapes have made the same journey you have.
Turned out almost as rich.
I love that trick.
Lets the person on the receiving end know you put thought into it, and work.
Hard to find those bottles.
My compliments to Axe.
Plus, it tastes like honey.
[GLASSES CLINK.]
[SIPS.]
What does he need? Your networks to air ads by a certain legal cannabis company.
Never been a tea smoker.
Never loved the culture surrounding it either.
And I don't see myself as being the first to break this particular barrier.
You know, there are no commercials for pot.
I can't really picture myself on the cover of High Times.
What about Fortune? Forbes? You'd be on all of them, like Springsteen in 75.
That was Time and Newsweek and the pressure nearly crushed him.
No, no.
It made him.
Took him to the next level.
I'd be a pariah amongst other networks and likely the FCC.
For about five minutes.
Then they'd be looking to catch up.
Pretty picture.
Thing is I've already got my board seat on the bank.
I've already got enough of everything I need.
Why should I put myself for it? For your daughter.
We heard whispers she's running for Congress and that she's refusing to take your money, wants to look self-made.
I admire my daughter and her convictions.
Yes.
But you also want her to win.
So Axe will see to it that enough money is funneled to her campaign looking like grassroots, Internet, small-donor Squad catnip, but enough in total to bury any and all of her opponents.
Long as she doesn't know, she'll appreciate that.
And I will too.
Good.
[WAGS.]
Miss Winslow, this, aside from being the most expensive album ever sold, is pretty fuckin' cool.
A gift to you from Bobby Axelrod.
Wu Tang's Once Upon a Time in Shaolin? A single copy pressed.
Heard of this but never heard it.
Martin Shkreli paid $2 million for this a few years back.
How the hell did you get it? Don't ask me how he got it.
Ask him.
Don't ask me either.
I thought you would appreciate it and learn from him.
Never get too big and too loud? Maybe.
But his mistake was being in the wrong drug business.
One that divided people instead of bringing them together.
Don't do that.
And don't gouge your customers and you can do this thing forever.
Never do, never would.
And I am in the right drug business.
Brings people together the way "Wild Cherry" did folks on a dance floor upon a time.
Is that insecticide keeping the red spider mites away? Febreze.
So it doesn't smell like a Wesleyan dorm room when I finally get it into the system.
Smart.
I thank you for the present.
It is a true fucking rarity.
But like I told your people, I'm already committed to another negotiation.
[AXE.]
Not so committed that you didn't want to see if you were missing out on something better.
And you were right, because you are.
Look, I'm sure he's offering you a square deal.
And he's filling a need.
You gotta be able to process and store your take someplace safe.
But I can do that and more.
I'm offering to take care of a need that no one else will touch.
I'm offering legitimacy.
I have a desirable product, a legal product.
Some states recently marked it as an essential product.
You're preaching to a man already walked the road to Damascus.
But I can get you on TV, mainstream media buys.
You can get that done? Networks and weblets avoid us like we're selling strychnine.
Not anymore.
Widespread ads targeted at your most coveted customers.
Make your warehouse look way too small for your cash.
I hate to walk away from my other suitor - this late in the game.
- Yeah, I'm sure.
But you'll note I didn't send someone who needs to learn business from you.
I sent my Tom Hagen because I'm in quarantine.
That just shows you how important this is to me.
Look, you've built something very special here.
Busted your ass to keep expanding it during some very tough times.
Oh, that's for sure.
Don't you owe it to yourself to go with the best deal? [SIGHS.]
I really do.
Ah the Solicitor General, as of a moment ago, is in receipt of your brief.
[PHONE BUZZES.]
[SIGHS.]
Excuse me.
I have to go.
- Ms.
Sacker? - It's nothing.
Is that right? Why don't you fill me in on the exact brand of nothing? Franklin Sacker announces he's relaxing policies with regard to advertising cannabinoids.
Singled out one company in particular with some sugar-sweet words.
Let me guess.
Fine Young Cannabis.
[SCOFFS.]
I guess my father is not the only one Axe has roped in.
Look, I know that your instinct will be to confront your dad, to warn him I already warned him.
With the Opportunity Zone.
He ignored me.
He should know better.
Yes, he should.
But perhaps he's been blinded by an Axelrod opportunity supernova.
Only way to back him off is to let him know the law is coming.
Uh the thing about that is, if your dad backs out because he's rattled, Axe will rattle too.
So you gotta let him dangle.
- Chuck - Whole operation gets blown if one piece gets out of order.
Shit! [SIGHS.]
- [SNIPS CIGAR.]
- Hm.
Uh, do you really have to do it that way? What if I just bite the end off? It'll be wet and uneven.
That's just something you saw in a movie.
It is something I saw in a movie.
And when the Wolverine did it We've been over this.
You're not Wolverine.
I can be.
With the right diet and workout program.
Yeah, and if I gargle enough, I can be Celine Dion.
You going with a V-cutter? You'll wind up too deep.
Something you've never heard before, Dollar Bill.
[CHUCKLES.]
[CHUCKLES.]
I'm a punch cut man.
Clean draw, prevents tar accumulation.
[VICTOR.]
Too precious, too much chance of crumbling.
I go guillotine all the way.
One perfect, decisive chop.
It's not fucking time! That's what Wags said at first, but then he passed them out to us.
Because we won a round.
Back in your pockets.
You can hold on to 'em now but don't smoke 'em till Axe gives the word.
I like that you're giving them something to look forward to at the finish line.
The cigars.
Now, what are you giving yourself? [EXHALES.]
[SMACKS LIPS.]
You ever been to Fiji? No.
But I know you have.
Yeah.
Last year, with Dean and Gordy.
Came back early.
Well, you said it was because the kids didn't like it.
I didn't totally buy that.
Yeah.
Didn't think you did.
And now, you know what I'm thinking about? The ocean there's the exact same temperature as the air.
And so when you walk into the water, you don't even feel it.
Fiji sounds Yeah.
[INHALES.]
As soon as I get a clean bill of health.
But first, victory smokes.
Yeah.
Thanks for making the trek to the sticks.
Oh, it's not far from where I grew up.
My elementary school is right around the corner.
Oh, you gonna make that stop next? I'm gonna wait to go with Leslie Stahl and the camera crew before the next election.
Maybe I'll squirt some tears when I look at the jungle gym I broke a tooth on.
- Hmm.
I'll be sure to watch.
- Hm.
Came across something that might interest you though.
Criminal behavior in Manhattan.
Is Rhoades hiding in a closet? - [SCOFFS.]
- Are you distracting me while someone plants something in the exhaust of my car? Truth? Chuck has no idea I'm even doing this.
Your father.
Jesus.
Why? I'll answer the "what" price fixing.
The evidence is in front of you.
The only why I'll answer is, I don't want my fingerprints on this.
As to why I need this done? Family shit.
I thank God every day I grew up medium-poor.
The ones with the Tiffany rattles could never stop warring with their own.
Hmm.
You know nothing about how I grew up.
Yeah, we had some money.
But I had to prove that I deserved my spot in the world every single day, much as you did in a different way.
You don't go into the justice business because it's a fair world, you do it because you want to make it one.
[PHONE BUZZING.]
Yes.
Are you ready to make your move? I already answered your question.
And your people? I don't know them.
- Can we trust them? - Can we trust anybody? Very few.
And only one way to find out.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
My appointment's here.
Say hi from me.
My new office is only a few blocks away, but I guess you didn't want to be seen there.
Congrats on the new job.
The second life after Spartan-Ives.
You always seem to play it tight.
Like that about you.
I might have been better off if I kept it locked down in the first place or never came back.
But the thing is, how many ports can you dock your yacht in before you get a little bit bored? Sixty.
It's pretty close.
Feels like you have a pitch for me.
But if you want to sell me, you gotta loose your lips a little.
Major player, very liquid in the cannabis space.
- You open to that? - Open? I'm hippy flippin' right now.
.
25 G psilocybin with 1.
5 mg MDMA booster.
So I'm most assuredly open.
In fact, if this is behind Axe's back, something I'd be taking from him wide motherfucking open.
I thought we had an understanding.
I gave you an actual order, yet your father was just arrested.
Don't pretend this is news to you.
I told you I wouldn't alert him.
I didn't.
You took him off the field.
A minor charge, some embarrassment, no jail time, to protect him from getting nailed as a board member in on the fix.
Don't think that falls under our agreement.
The one founded in transparency? It took a little while for that to stick on your side, so I guess I'm still catching up, but that shouldn't affect your main concern, Axlerod.
Think of how this looks to him, like it was your move.
Like you dinged my dad so Prince would stay in the lead.
If this were truly a competition over the cannabis money that's exactly the kind of throat-cutting you would engage in.
I helped sell it.
You may be right.
[EXHALES.]
But don't act like that's why you did it.
We don't all enjoy sending our fathers to the wolves.
We don't.
But we do it, because we not only accomplish whatever we were after, we get the thing they wouldn't give us any other way respect.
[EXHALES.]
Oh, and by the way, Judge DeGiulio texted me about your brief.
Quote, "Fucking seaworthy," unquote.
High praise.
Congratulations.
[SCOFFS.]
Have you still not been able to reach Franklin Sacker? Radio silence.
His office can't even find him.
But you do have a message from Bach.
The Solicitor General has the brief in his filing for cert.
- He said you - Yeah, I know exactly what it means.
I have another call.
Mike Prince.
Bobby, I feel a little like Cathy Moriarty in Raging Bull, the way you keep pursuing me even though you know it's no good for you.
Weird way to start a call, Mike.
Well, I'm expanding my perspective.
I I've heard many times about Axe, the thought leader, the man ahead of the curve, doing his own thing.
I don't know if he ever existed, but I haven't seen him.
The Axe I'm acquainted with is a pirate, or in the lingua franca of your beloved New York streets, a goniff.
You tried to steal from me again.
It didn't work.
Your media advantage is gone.
Winslow and I have wrapped up our negotiations.
And you know what you wound up with? Nothing in your hand but moonlight.
I have strings attached to all of my fingers.
When I yank 'em, you are gonna shake, rattle, and shit yourself.
So this is what the inside of a therapist's office looks like.
You've never been to therapy? Just fucking with you.
Twice a week since I was 11.
[SIGHS.]
I love the environment, like a model room in a department store.
A focus group-tested simulacrum of cozy comfort, tasteful and personalised, but impersonal.
I think this is where I feel most comfortable.
- That's the idea.
- Helpful.
Because I have to share some shit that's making me feel seriously awk-ward, awkward.
Yeah, I thought that's probably what you meant.
I saw something I shouldn't have.
And it's fucking me up.
Normally, I keep that stuff to myself.
Oof, what I have hidden about my mum from my grandma, and then also about my grandma from my mum.
Do you wanna go there? I don't know.
Do you? I'm a trained shrink.
So, always.
But I think that's not actually what's bothering you.
[SIGHS.]
I can't sit on this if I wanna keep working here.
And I think I want to keep working here.
But if I talk about it, maybe I can't work here anyway.
What type of a paradox is that? One that probably only gets better if you take a deep breath [TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
and actually tell me.
I was in Taylor's office dropping stuff off and on their computer screen, ugh Taylor had a meeting with Lawrence Boyd about a company we told Axe to pump the brakes on.
Taylor went to a rival with the opposite advice? I don't wanna work in a place with secrets, lies, backstabbing, side-stabbing, any stabbing.
Understandable.
So I know how best to handle this.
Are you confiding it to me in session or are you reporting to me as your boss at Mase Carbon? Whoa.
You have made your life very complicated.
I'm trying to make mine less so by offloading this.
So [CHUCKLES.]
good luck with all of that.
[SIGHS.]
I would like to have an abstract, hypothetical conversation about serving multiple masters.
No, you don't.
Not with me.
If this were about Axe, you would say, "Axe, this is about Taylor.
" They did something you need to tell me without telling me.
I really expected that to take a few more rounds.
You're not the only person here who can solve a puzzle with just one letter on the board.
I know when you want a drinking pal and when you have an agenda.
Taylor went behind Axe's back to lay off the cannabis deal to a third party.
Whoa, fuck.
Who? Lawrence Boyd.
Doubly fucked.
I got it from here.
I gotta ask you.
Why aren't you on the phone with him right now? - Telling him about Taylor? - No.
Trying to talk him out of taking on the cannabis money.
You think he needs to be talked out of it? No.
I think you think he does.
Something's different, shifted.
You're not divided between Axe and Taylor.
You're divided between Axe and Axe.
You don't want to be the one shouting him down anymore.
Trying to tell him to ignore his instincts.
Why not? Because that doesn't work with a a A partner? I get it.
If you and Axe are gonna have another kind of thing, you need to make peace with who he is and stop trying to change him.
Is that what's going on? Have you made that peace? Thank you for taking this to him.
[SIGHS.]
[GRAMM.]
Hey, Chuck.
Uh, I know that Sacker tipped you off about her dad.
Now, you had your headline and your fun.
You don't need to pick up a penalty flag for the fire hydrant celebration.
Franklin Sacker and Axelrod.
Your father and Delaware.
It's all connected.
Your Jeffersonian dinner theater was setting up a move.
There was no ideological fight.
It was masking scent on a snare.
You're working with Prince - to bring down Axe.
- [SIGHS.]
And now what? Hmm? You take this theory to him? Win his eternal gratitude? It'd be a real smile.
Oh, fun factor's high, I'll grant you that.
Sky fuckin' high.
And I'd have him forever in my debt.
- Powerful ally.
- Hmm.
For sure.
But then you become Mike Prince's eternal enemy.
Hmm.
True.
And mine.
Hmm.
All that power.
And pettiness.
Trained upon me.
Every bit of it.
So shoot your shot.
Our turf war over criminal cases is over.
I surrender.
Like Captain Fehler on U-boat 234.
From now on, you will clear all criminal cases with me? Yes.
Provided you grant me one imminent arrest.
Dawn Winslow and where she leads.
Enjoy it.
May be the only one for quite some time.
[SIGHS.]
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES.]
Your business makes money for Axe.
So you won't be put out of business.
There'll just be enough locks on it that you'll suffocate if you fight too hard.
And who winds up holding the key? - Take a guess.
- [SPYROS.]
I have to approve any investment over seven figs.
That's every investment.
So I guess much like Andy Summers, I'm on top of every move you make.
And you can no longer make soft dollar arrangements on your own.
Those are my relationships with other firms.
They're Hard Bob's relationships too now.
Because they all clear through him.
And what does Victor do? Whatever you do.
I need to explain to Axe how these strictures You don't talk to him.
Or see him anymore.
The only face you see is mine.
Mine too.
We need to clear the atmosphere.
Victor, give us the room.
- No can.
- Give us the fucking room.
Okay.
We're supposed to be partners, but you freelanced on the Boyd play.
You're tracking my schedule now? What the fuck? No.
How the fuck do I excuse your lack of trust in me? We may be looking at a foundational question here, because are we partners? On paper, kinda.
In person, same.
Sometimes you act like it in the same way you once acted as my shrink or my friend.
But Axe really controls it all, just like he always did.
So where does that leave me? Well, sounds like at battle stations again.
Is that really what you want? [SIGHS.]
- No.
- Me neither.
I want to believe the best of you because that's the kind of world I want to live in.
And like it or not, we're lashed together.
So? I guess tell Victor to set up his fucking desk.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES.]
I come bearing gifts, again.
Shocked you'd want to show your face after your boss sold me something he couldn't deliver.
We've come back to you with an offer we don't need anyone else for.
Three percent.
- Interest on my money.
- The going rate at most banks right now is close to zero.
You just need to get your cash safe and in the system, and we're offering you icing.
Nice.
But not enough to walk away from Prince.
Axe thought you'd say that.
So there's also this.
I did let my subscription to Architectural Digest lapse.
[AXE.]
The house.
My country house.
It is now your house.
This is my offer and there's no shopping it.
I want your answer right now.
I wanted to give you something personally, something that matters to me so you know the kind of partner that I will be - for you down the road.
- You're on the water.
Why do you need an Olympic-sized indoor pool? You'll appreciate it come October.
I think I will.
But I can't go through the whole due diligence process again.
Prince spent the last few weeks digging through my entire business and I need to be done.
Just cross out Prince's name in the deal and put mine in.
And I will use his due diligence as my own and sign.
We have a deal.
Good.
[WAGS.]
Now I can get back to more pressing business.
[FORKLIFT BEEPING.]
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
One last how-do-you-do before I meet Big Daddy? For luck? Hmm.
[DOOR OPENS.]
Wagner! Hey there, Dad.
Is it too soon? I look forward to long talks, throwin' the ball around.
Is this the man you've been telling me about? Wags, what is going on? You two know each other? Your old man threw down the gauntlet, had me dress up like Carol Channing only to spit in my eye.
I told him what I would do in his eye.
And now I have.
Wagner, you walking Special Victims Unit.
You defiled my offspring.
No doubt with a criminal combination of mendacity, manipulation, and Spanish fly.
[CHUCKLES.]
Oh no.
You raised a fine piece of daughter.
She knows her own mind and body.
And what a live body it is.
You knew he was my father the entire time? That's what this has always been about? The middle was real.
You motherfucker.
If you think my father knows how to get revenge, you have no idea what I'm capable of.
Wait, wait.
Chelz.
[GROANS.]
I went looking in earnest and stopped on your profile.
Then I recognised your picture and your name.
[CHUCKLES.]
Like I said, the middle was real.
- Don't bother, Wagner.
- Shut up, Mick.
Let him try and talk his way out of this, Dad.
It'll make it sweeter.
[WAGS.]
What I felt for you wasn't just lust.
Or amusement.
Or respect.
I had to follow through on my revenge because, well, because it's who I am.
I just fuckin' had to.
But it was hard.
[CHUCKLING.]
It was fantastic, but really, really hard.
Because I don't want to lose you.
And if there's any way you could see to forgive me and give us a real shot Wagner, you're disturbed.
Every great love story springs from the forbidden comes true against all obstacles of good family and good taste because sometimes a heart finds another heart it needs to be with.
You had me at the middle.
[TYPING.]
Peach, kill the smoke detectors.
I have had We have had so many wins.
There were so many times that I almost pulled out the Auerbachs.
Glad as hell that we waited.
Now light 'em up like you're that goddamn Grucci family.
[ALL CHEER.]
I'm strictly forbidden to smoke right now, but I'm gonna do it anyway.
Fuck yeah! Axe swallowed it.
He actually closed on that money.
Didn't do his own due diligence, just accepted Prince's and took it down like sushi laced with polonium.
Wouldn't have happened without the efforts of everyone in this room.
Or without great personal cost.
As all great triumphs require.
Liz and Gail are here.
They're coming up in the private elevator.
I pray that when they know what I've done, that they'll understand.
We should go anyway.
Time to arrest Winslow.
A legal cannabis seller cannot make up for seasonal shortfall by adding in a black-market crop of Humboldt County with the legit stuff.
You've combed through all the possibilities.
Looked into every legal cannabis company until you found the one CEO who also happened to be running a criminal enterprise.
She's no longer a business pioneer.
Just another drug dealer moving major weight.
I'm betting she won't hold up long before flipping on Axe.
I'll leave with you.
In the name of decorum, let me show you the regular elevators.
[DOOR OPENS.]
[LAUGHING AND TALKING INDISTINCTLY.]
So have the contracts been signed yet? We didn't land the deal.
Winslow went with Bobby Axelrod's bank.
Shit.
Sorry, Dad.
I thought we did really well.
Is it done-done? I mean, can we call and ask her for another meeting? That's exactly the right attitude.
Never quit.
Never take no for an answer.
Remember that.
Actually, no, I can't.
I won't lie to you.
This all worked out exactly how I knew it would.
Wait, what? You wanted to lose? I needed Bobby Axelrod to win the deal.
To bank the money.
You used us? To what? Like, bait him in? Gail, he didn't do that.
You didn't do that.
[SIGHS.]
Wait, one sec.
Why did you want Axelrod to win? So he'd go to jail.
Because that's also where Winslow's going.
Believe me when I tell you, Mike Prince and his daughters made the world a better place today.
You played us.
Dangled us out there like assholes Hey, you wanted to know what it felt like.
And come on, you took one meeting.
We practiced our pitch all night.
Well, you got some experience.
Maybe rethink Europe, the JetBlue version, if you want.
[SCOFFS.]
Save it, Dad.
We're starting to know what your old partner - must have felt like - Hey, that crap is over the line.
This is business.
This is what not having a soft landing feels like.
You tear your butt when you hit the ground.
We didn't even have a chance to win.
Yeah.
This time the odds were stacked against you.
Just like you said you wanted.
Now you haven't been robbed of it.
But, uh, next time you'll do better.
I don't like this.
Or your face right now, Dad.
Yeah.
This sucks.
Yeah, Mike Prince, you are kind of sucking right now.
[SIGHS.]
You know they roll them on their thighs, slow and steady.
The sweat intermingles, which gives it a distinct I can't decide if that makes it more or less appealing.
I think less, but I want to think more.
[ELEVATOR BELL RINGS.]
I'm not much for group gropes but I'll smoke one with you.
[SNIFFS.]
You should join the party.
Heard that a lot of times in my life.
Thank you for what you did.
I know you were scared to go to Wendy like that.
- But we needed it.
- Hmm.
Maybe the most exhilarating moment of my life.
[CHUCKLES.]
That and when I found a Tamagotchi emulator, oof.
God, it just feels like old times.
You know, there's been so much shit, so much bad blood.
- [PHONE BUZZING.]
- But a pure win like this, after all we've been through? Fuck, I miss these days.
The estimable Zino Davidoff once said, "A cigar ought not to be smoked solely "with the mouth, but with the hand, with the eyes, with the spirit.
" Oh, Jesus.
Wow.
I believe a good cigar and glass of wine and a good conversation is as close to euphoria as one can get.
In a legal sense.
Davidoff again? Sly Stallone.
[TUK.]
Are these going to your head? They're going to my head.
You're smoking a little fast.
I'm excited.
Douse the fucking smokes.
Now! Get Axe up on the screen, now! You got it.
You know who I am You know I can't let you Slide through my hands [WAGS.]
Dawn Winslow was just arrested.
Criminal drug trafficking.
They're coming for you next.
How me? It's gonna be legal.
Uh-uh.
What she was selling wasn't.
- Fuck! - If she goes down for that, and you bank the resulting money, you are on the hook.
Specifics? According to my guy, sometime in the next 24 hours they believe they'll have you in custody, and they don't believe you have a way out this time.
Just give the order and we move.
On your command.
Couldn't drag me away I watched you suffer.
.
What do you want us to do? A dull aching pain I have no fucking idea.
To show me the same No sweeping exits Or offstage lines Could make me feel bitter Or treat you unkind Wild horses Couldn't drag me away
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