Call the Midwife s05e06 Episode Script

Series 5, Episode 6

1 'A sense of community is the Holy Grail of modern living.
'When we cannot find it in the present day, 'we reach back through the years and say, ' "That was when we knew each other.
' "That was when we held all things in common.
" 'It is a thought so tender and consoling, 'that it scarcely matters if it is not true.
'Past perfection is a wondrous thing.
' The Bible had a plague of locusts, we have a plague of pensioners! Scarcely a crumb left in their wake, and I'm sorry to say that I've just had my bottom pinched.
- I think that's Mr Pilbeam.
The man on the right trestle table.
- You too? Twice.
I asked Tom to give him a hard, cold stare, but it didn't discourage him at all.
Afternoon, dear! - Mrs Hills? How lovely to see you! - Hello, Nurse Franklin.
I heard this year's funds wouldn't stretch to taking the old folk to the seaside, so I thought I'd bring a bit of the seaside to them.
Oh, that's so kind! You must stay for a cup of tea! I can't stop long.
I've left my Diane looking after the stall.
There's no harm in taking the weight off your feet for five minutes.
Especially given your rather interesting condition.
This? Yes, number five.
It gets to be like shelling peas.
I seem to remember WE helped shell peas number two, three and four.
I hope we haven't done anything to offend.
I'm going to the clinic at St Cuthbert's.
They want me to have it in hospital, on account of my age.
Well, they're obviously taking very good care of you, because you look extremely well.
- I'm an old hand, Mrs Turner.
The autoclave is coming to the end of its cycle.
I shall replenish your instruments as soon as it concludes.
Thank you, Nurse Crane.
They said they'd come and repair the one at the surgery tomorrow.
Ooh, Doctor, whatever is this? - Cornish pasty? - Or more precisely, half of one.
Would it have killed you to sit down for five minutes and eat the whole thing? Now, hop it, and put your feet up in the parlour while I sort you out some instruments.
Mr Pilbeam's demanded a refill.
I think he might just find we keep him waiting.
- Shelagh, did you know Mrs Hills was expecting again? - Not till now.
I just wondered who referred her to St Cuthbert's? Frightfully sorry.
Creamless scone alert! We've run out of cream again? Certain guests have been taking more than their fair share.
I threatened to put one man over my knee, but it only encouraged him.
Timothy! Please don't make me play any more.
You've done your bit, dear.
Now, run inside and open three more tins of Nestle's cream.
In the meantime, I popped into you-know-where last night and the you-know-whats are ready for you-know-when! I think you'd better take charge of this.
Dad? Dad! I was just waiting for the autoclave to finish.
You need a holiday.
Nobody ever NEEDS a holiday, Timothy.
Which isn't to say it wouldn't be a nice thing to have.
Tom, I think that was one of the best films I've ever seen.
No wonder we couldn't get tickets last week! Whistle Down The Wind is a bit of a funny title, though.
Doesn't even hint at the Christian message.
Maybe that's a good thing.
I think we ought to go again - and take the Sunday school with us.
- See? I am nothing if not an incurable romantic.
That sounds splendid.
On one condition.
What? That you promise to bring the parish sweetie jar and fill it with sherbet lollies.
Actually - Oh! - Purple and green.
My favourite! I wanted to give it to you in the pictures, but there were too many people looking.
Well well, there's no-one looking now.
Help me! Help me, please! It's all right, you're safe.
You're safe now.
Fetch the police.
No! No! Please, not the police.
I'm sorry, Lizzie.
It won't sting for long.
It's well sugared.
- Do you mind if I smoke? - Not at all.
Here.
It's all right, Lizzie.
You're safe here.
- I should go.
- I can walk you to the police station, after Nurse Gilbert's tidied you up.
- No.
I told you, I got enough to worry about, without a conviction for soliciting.
I think you might be bruised, where your blouse is torn.
Would you let me have a look, and perhaps put some arnica on it? He bit you? Could've been worse.
The other girls say the johns get up to all kinds.
But I ain't been doing it long.
Oh, I have to go.
- Lizzie - I have to.
I have to get back to my kids.
How awful.
And we were only waiting up to see if you'd help Delia with her bust-darts.
It's all hands on deck once I start tangling with bodices! I'm a terrible seamstress.
There was nowhere she could turn to.
No-one who would help her.
- Apart from you.
- A few kind words and a bit of antiseptic.
There's nothing to stop you from reporting it to the police.
Perhaps you should.
Can't do any harm.
Might make you feel better.
Hello, girls.
How was your evening? Well, we enjoyed the film.
How was Art History? Riveting! We're doing Vermeer, I can't resist a good interior.
I wondered if things had got a bit emotional.
Your mascara's run a bit.
Ooh, I sat upstairs on the bus.
It got wretchedly smoky.
Is that Ovaltine? Show me the way that I should walk in For I lift up my soul unto thee.
- Mum, can I come in? - In a minute! I'm not decent! Really need to go, Mum! Lovely and fresh, make sure you fry 'em in some nice, clean lard! Nice, clean pavement's what we want.
Can't be selling fish from a pitch with spit and fag ends all underfoot.
- Mrs Hills! - Yes, dear? Just a thank-you note for your contribution to the Pensioner's Tea! Oh, you're welcome.
I'll be a pensioner myself soon enough! Should've told your Alf that, before he had his way with ya! Don't work too hard, Mrs Hills! You heard the nurse, Diane.
You ought be doing the heavy stuff, not leaving it all to your ma in her condition.
Well, Diane's better at all the adding and subtracting than I'll ever be, Vera.
Any idiot can do the donkey work.
A bite mark? I'm sorry you had to see that.
Oh, I'M perfectly all right! But this woman - Lizzie - she looked as if she'd been attacked by an animal.
There's things go on round here that you don't want to trouble your head with.
Sergeant, we've had working girls on our midwifery books, and we see them in the doctor's when they have VD.
This was different.
She suffered as a consequence not of sex, but of violence.
We can't do anything unless she makes a formal complaint.
But she can't! Because she thinks SHE'S the criminal! Well, legally, they're both in the wrong.
He beat her up, of course.
But if she was out soliciting, she could get a £60 fine or jail.
Even just for loitering on the pavement.
And if she's got children, like she said, it's not going to end well for anyone.
It's not right, though, is it? It's the law.
Ah, Sister.
I wasn't sure if you'd been called out yet.
It's no doubt the calm before the storm, but the phone hasn't rung once this morning.
I thought I'd get ahead with the chapel flowers.
And some for your office.
You have a knack for floristry, Sister.
And a very sweet voice.
A sweet voice? And in chapel, I can hardly hear you.
If we are to praise the Lord in song, we should do it gladly.
And as loudly as possible.
Oh Sister Julienne.
I'm always afraid of singing TOO loudly.
When I was a postulant, we were told never to draw attention to ourselves in any way - because it was a sign of pride.
And now I've drawn attention to myself by Not singing loudly enough.
I always find that if I feel singled out for either praise or blame, the best response is to offer it up and say, "What good would this do for others?" Of course, Sister.
And if you could raise your voice with us, it would make us feel so very blessed.
Thank you.
Thought that nurse seemed nice this morning.
I just think we'd be better off getting one of them in.
Diane, we've discussed this.
You mean, YOU'VE discussed it with yourself.
If you want an argument, Diane, turn round and look at me.
I don't want to turn round, and I don't want to look at ya.
Because if I do, I'll see you putting your hand on your back, and rubbing your belly, and huffing and puffing when you bend over.
And I can't do ANY of those things! Diane.
You brought all this on yourself.
Running round with some lad from a building site, who legged it without leaving his address.
- What's going to happen, Mum? - You know what's going to happen.
You're going to have it here, and I'm going to look after you.
And we're going to say that it's mine.
I mean, WHAT'S going to happen? How will it get out? I'll take you through that when the time comes.
Which, please God, will be before your dad gets back from sea, cos I don't fancy your chances at all.
Why don't you just send me up that mother and baby place, like Janice Myers? - Because Janice Myers is shoddy goods for life.
And she's going to come back here empty-handed! Listen, Diane, you are not the first, and you won't be the last.
I know three or four families where the baby's grown up thinking its mother's its sister.
- Who? - Never you mind who! Go and get your apron on before your brothers get in from Cubs.
All right.
Only, watch out.
Your pillow's slipping.
Oh, dear, someone's out of sorts.
He's always out of sorts.
He never stops crying.
I'm scared there's something wrong with him.
Dear me, young man! It's only a postnatal check-up, no need to be so vexed.
Why don't we see who's free, bump you up the queue a bit.
I can't find any reason to refer him to Doctor - there's a possibility it's a touch of colic, and we can keep an eye on that together.
Now, Mrs Coleman.
Are you getting any sleep? I'm walking the floors with him most nights.
My husband has to get up at the crack of dawn for work - it's his sleep that matters.
Well, you won't be able to take care of Michael properly if you're exhausted.
While the nights are still so mild, a gentle bedtime walk in the fresh air might do you both good.
I'll try anything, Sister.
How many doors, is it just one door? It's time to come to the table, Patrick.
We've something extra special for dinner this evening.
What's all this? Chicken a la King, with piped mashed potato and creamed spinach.
Please note the ornamental folded serviettes.
All my own work, and copied out of Woman's Realm at Mum's insistence.
We never have serviettes on a weeknight.
Well, we're having them today.
In fact, we're going to indulge ourselves in every conceivable luxury and refinement because tomorrow we're going camping! No, Dad.
We really are.
I've got work tomorrow, Shelagh.
And so have you.
Absolutely everything is in hand.
We've arranged locum cover for a week and Sister Julienne is fully in support.
The locum's called Dr Godfrey and she's even offered him lodgings at Nonnatus while we're away.
Akela's arranged for us to borrow two tents and as much of the Cubs' equipment as we need.
Mum's even bought a little half-size sleeping bag for Angela.
- Really? - Really.
I couldn't be happier.
Very prettily done, Sister.
But you cannot tempt me.
Everyone has noticed that you aren't eating properly at mealtimes, Sister.
My strength comes from another source.
And I hope you do not need to ask from whence.
No, of course not.
But How recently did you study for Novices' Vows? Were you not apprised of the practice of mortification of the flesh? Yes.
(Oh) Are you trying to fast? I have few joys and therefore little to surrender.
Sister, you found the Lenten fast very hard.
Why now? I am in fair health now, and able to sustain the sacrifice.
But, Sister, IF you want to fast, you must tell the rest of the community what you're doing.
That way we can uphold you.
Very well.
You may remove this platter of frivolities.
Of course.
Good, stout Army surplus.
Perfect for a week in the New Forest! Patsy says they've been serving the Cubs of Poplar for 15 years.
I remember this one from when we did our camping badge at Selsey Bill.
It's got bullet holes along the ridge.
I'm quite sure they're not bullet holes, Timothy.
They were probably made by moths.
Or mice.
It does all smell rather musty.
And there's mould in this billycan.
Oh, it just needs a quick swill in some hot water.
Shelagh This holiday is about getting back to nature and being together as a family.
We'll enjoy it, won't we? Yes, we will.
Because we've earned it.
- Half a pound of tuppenny rice Half a pound of treacle That's the way the money goes Every night when we go out the monkeys I love you.
I love you, Michael.
But you're going to kill me.
We did the right thing putting you on iron tablets.
Don't reckon you're anaemic - good going for nine months.
I was anaemic with ALL of you.
Makes me feel sick when I see all that.
I've had four and everything's in hand.
Put it out of your mind.
We have two or three ladies on our books who are very close to term.
Their records have already been moved to to the green filing cabinet over in the maternity home.
They're also double-copied to the Nonnatus House log and my own personal Rolodex, which is widely held to be infallible.
Rolodex? I like the sound of that, Nurse Cray.
Crane.
As in the wading bird, or industrial lifting equipment, whichever you prefer.
Ulcer clinic is on Friday afternoons.
We've been experimenting with a new antibiotic powder Which I will be delighted to discuss with Dr Godfrey.
It's cutting-edge stuff like this that brings me out of retirement time and time again! I imagine you feel the same.
I shall consider retirement as and when I reach the appropriate age, Dr Godfrey, which will not be for some years.
Shelagh, I can get the tents or the children in the car.
But not both! May I refer you to my earlier offer to loan you my roof rack, which you declined? - You may.
I left it out for you in the hall at Nonnatus House.
Buenas vacaciones.
Thank you.
I keep wanting to avert my eyes but they're just too compelling! I think shorts are a very practical choice for a camping holiday.
And not amusing in any way at all! I'm not looking.
Really, I'm not.
You could launch this car like a Sputnik, and this roof rack would not budge an inch.
Patrick.
We need to get going, it's already starting to rain.
Fear not, Mrs T.
Nurse Gilbert is on the case.
What is it? I thought it might help keep the things on the roof rack dry.
- It's an incontinence sheet from the charity box.
- Perfect! I hope it doesn't smell of urine.
Ooh, by the way, Doc, I like the shorts.
I had a pair like that in El Alamein.
I had a pair in Monte Cassino.
No wonder we won the war! The place is upside down, Sister.
I wasn't expecting you.
I happened to be passing, and thought I'd see if this young man had started behaving himself.
He's all right.
Did you try taking him for a walk to settle him at bedtime? I told you, he's all right.
Judith? Your face Oh, I-I've always been clumsy.
It's even worse now I don't get any sleep.
- What happened? - I clumped myself one with the wardrobe door.
Things can take time to settle down when a newborn comes along.
We're here to help, whatever upsets you're having.
Cry as much as you can bear to.
Then tell me why, and what I can do.
I couldn't tell you.
I can't! I can't.
It's such a a delicate matter.
But there's a very young baby in the house.
It's clearly a volatile situation.
- Is she married? - Yes.
And to a good, steady man, as far as I can tell.
- But - "Walking into doors" is never a good sign.
And getting them to tell the truth is always difficult.
The thing that disturbed me the most wasn't the bruise on her face.
It was the one on her neck, by her shoulder.
It looked as if someone had sunk his teeth into her.
- Like a bite mark? - It just looked so vicious.
Let me see if I can make enquiries.
Here comes summer School is out, oh happy day Here comes summer Gonna grab my girl and run away Here comes summer We'll go swimming every day And let the sun shine bright on my happy summer home Here comes summer We'll meet the gang at Joe's Cafe If she's willing We'll go steady right away Oh, let the sun shine bright on my happy summer home Let the sun shine bright Well, here comes summertime at last.
- Thank you.
- A fine example of labour rewarded! I haven't seen a spread like this since the Coronation party at my old practice.
You must help me out with these cream horns.
Allow me.
Sister Monica Joan is eschewing indulgence for religious reasons.
And I'm partial to flaky pastry.
I'm sorry to intrude, ladies, sir.
How could you possibly intrude, Sergeant Noakes? You're one of the family.
I actually called in regards to the attacks on, er, Judith Coleman and the girl on the street.
- Do you mean Lizzie? - Yes.
Because of the similarity of the bite marks on her neck, we can't rule out that they were attacked by the same man.
I suppose there's a remote possibility that it might be Judith Coleman's husband.
- Colin Coleman? I'm sorry, I've met more aggressive marshmallow bunnies.
Or that Judith herself was out soliciting.
- No! - Either way, if the situation at her home is volatile, as you suggested, Sister Julienne, we'd put her at risk if we went round and quizzed him.
So our first port of call should be the other girl.
Lizzie was adamant that she wouldn't speak to the police.
If you could come with me, we might be able to pull her round.
May I, Sister Julienne? I would be grateful if you did.
Room service.
Oh, Patrick! I put a nip of Scotch in from my handy secret hipflask.
You wouldn't get that in the Ritz! Ooh! Oooh.
Ooh, at last! My knees are freezing.
Patrick.
No.
No, no.
We're on our holidays.
It doesn't matter.
- Your sleeping bag's soaking wet! - At least it's WARM wet! What are you thinking about? The children.
Do you suppose they'll be all right in their own tent? Of course they will.
They're only about five feet away.
What if it falls down again? It won't, I promise you.
What are you thinking about? The ulcer clinic.
There's a couple of really nasty chronic venous cases that aren't responding to the new regime.
- Patrick! I'm sorry.
But I'm just not sure about Godfrey.
General practice is a young man's game.
You're not supposed to be thinking about work.
And if you don't mind my saying so, you're not exactly Cliff Richard yourself.
I could sing a chorus of Summer Holiday if you'd like me to! Oh, no! Mum? Dad? Can we come in with you? The trouble is, since the '59 Act, most women have been forced off the kerb and into brothels and private premises.
It's only the amateurs and the desperate who risk the streets.
I don't know if Lizzie was amateur or professional, but she was desperate.
I know that.
She had children.
When I think of my little Freddie tucked up in his bed, I could cry.
- How IS Chummy? - Excellent, thank you.
She's taken up pottery at night school, which is interesting.
That's Lizzie! I remember that coat.
Lizzie? Please stop.
Lizzie! You're not in any trouble.
My friend, Sergeant Noakes, just wants to ask you a few questions.
Nurse Gilbert told me what happened.
I'd like to help.
In which case, the best thing you can do is find out where my husband went.
Because if you did that, I wouldn't be having to sell myself to help feed the kids I had because I gave myself - for nothing - to a man I thought might stick around! - I'm sorry, Mrs - Call me Lizzie.
That's what I say to all the blokes.
And I'm not saying anything else to you! Morning.
Sorry to keep you, Fred.
Or maybe I should call you Mr Buckle, since I've asked you in on official business.
- Civil Defence, Sergeant? We haven't the manpower to put extra bobbies on the streets.
And until we're sure these attacks are connected, and ongoing, I can't apply for reinforcements from outside the Division.
But the CDC can put on extra patrols.
Confidence and safety of the public is paramount.
It's why we serve.
This is so much nicer than cooking at home.
The trouble with chest disease, in the context of community medicine research - Patrick.
is that it's largely presumed to affect the male population more than the female.
- You're talking about work again.
Sorry.
It's the smoke, making you cough.
It reminded me about Work.
- Mum? - Where's Angela! She's down here.
But she's seen a squirrel and she won't stop crying.
I knew this would happen.
She's petrified of squirrels.
She doesn't even like Squirrel Nutkin, and he's only a picture in a book! It's all right, darling! Mummy's coming! Tin of rice pudding and an early night for you tonight.
Mum? I feel like I'm going to wet myself.
Press your legs together.
Don't let anything come out in a rush.
I spy with my little eye something beginning with T-F.
Tent flap.
Although the correct term is actually "the beckett".
Is it? Your turn.
And no animals beginning with S, please, because we've just got Angela settled.
I spy with my little eye, something beginning with B-H-I-R-O-T-R-S-T-C-I.
Bullet holes in ridge of tent, rain starting to come in.
Ten out of ten.
Your turn.
I spy with my little eye, something beginning with R-N-H-I-S-O-T-W G-P-W-B-I-T-F-T-R-O-T-W.
What?! Rather nice hotel I spotted on the way here.
Get packed.
We're booking in there for the rest of the week.
I don't want you three playing silly beggars, running all over the place tonight.
Once you're in bed, you stay in bed, do you hear me? It's still light! Never mind "it's still light"! People grow when they're asleep.
If you can't stop in bed you'll end up a short-arse, like your Uncle Sammy.
Go on.
You know the rules.
Let's see if you can stick to 'em.
- Night, Diane.
- Night.
Evidence would suggest that this man attacked two women on two nights back-to-back.
One was set upon here.
The exact location of the second attack is unclear.
We will be patrolling in pairs from 9pm until dawn.
Dawn? You'd think there was a war on! There is no cause for levity.
Ladies' safety is at risk.
What ladies? That's nice That's my girl.
That's it.
That's it.
Shh.
That's it, you're doing so well.
Well done.
No noise.
There's a good girl.
Bite down.
Bite down.
The head's coming.
We've got to get you out! That's it.
Run, rabbit, run, rabbit Run, run, run.
What's this programme called again? Juke Box Jury.
They play the records to a panel of experts, and then they give their verdict.
And they are often incorrect in their opinion.
That is why we at Nonnatus House generally confine ourselves to Songs Of Praise and Panorama.
It's a bally catchy little tune.
Who's singing it? Pinky And Perky.
You can't see them, but they're pigs.
Although they are not real.
Doctor Godfrey! I have just been flagged down in the street by a patient who's been waiting for a house-call from you, since three o'clock this afternoon, in acute pain with psoriatic arthritis.
- Poor man.
- Woman, as it happens.
And I assured her she would be your first call tomorrow.
I will be disappointed if you make a liar of me! All care will be dispensed at thy dictates.
Give her a robe, a shield and a helmet and she'd be the double of Britannia.
That's it! The head's out.
When you feel another pain, you push like hell, do you hear me? That's it! That's it! It's a boy! - We've got a boy, Diane! - Can I see him? In a minute.
When I've tied and cut the cord.
Not been called out yet? I am positively poised to spring into action.
Shoes on, panstick applied, and one ear cocked for the telephone.
Where were YOU? In Delia's room.
She was just teaching me a new card game.
Stay there.
If you feel another pain, you push.
I just want to go to bed! You can't! You've got to get rid of the afterbirth.
None of mine took this long It's not right.
Stay in here, and don't move.
Mum! Don't leave me! Is that Nonnatus House? I need to speak to Nurse Franklin.
I'm sure you'd rather talk to a doctor.
The name's Godfrey.
I've just delivered a baby, and the afterbirth hasn't come away.
- And what is the patient's name? - Hills.
It's been more than an hour-and-a-half! The placenta can take its time, but I expect you know that from your training.
Employ Brandt Andrews, and, er, don't forget, good pull on the cord.
- Thank you, Doctor.
- Best of British! - Doctor Godfrey! - Apologies for appearing deshabille! I have heard such enticing things about the midnight larder at Nonnatus House.
The larder's in the kitchen.
I came down because I heard the telephone.
One of your colleagues struggling to deliver a placenta.
She asked for you, but I obliged with procedural advice.
- Which colleague? - She didn't give her name.
Said the patient's name was Hills.
I need you back on the floor.
They told me what to do.
Come on! I'm sorry.
I know you're only second on call, but something distinctly odd has happened.
I'm just going to pull on it, all right? What's happened? - What's your name, sweetie? - It's Diane.
We're here to help, Diane.
- What have I done? - Baby's well.
Let me examine you and see what's causing all this pain.
I only did what the doctor said.
I only pulled on the cord because the afterbirth was stuck.
You pulled too hard, Thora.
It isn't just the afterbirth that's come out.
It's Diane's womb.
The placenta is still attached, and there's no haemorrhage.
Thora, Thora, I want you to sit down and hold baby while Nurse Franklin helps Diane.
It's all right, Diane, I'm a midwife.
I'm going to call an ambulance.
Sister! What are you doing out on your own? I have to use the telephone.
It's an emergency.
Come on.
You can have an escort there and back.
Make believe you're the Queen.
Help me.
Please, help me Hold my hand.
Can you feel how steady it is? I'm not shaking.
And that's because I know what I'm doing, you're quite safe.
Flying Squad will take half an hour to get here.
That's all right.
We can manage splendidly on our own.
Can't we? Yes, we can.
It's all right, Diane.
Nurse Franklin's going to set things to rights.
It won't be uncomfortable for too long.
- Stay strong, sweetie, and stay still.
I'm sorry, sweetheart.
You're being so brave, Diane.
And I know you can be brave for a few moments longer I thought I could do it on my own.
I thought I didn't need no-one else.
It's back in place.
I'll follow them to Admissions.
Unfortunately we can't trust Thora to tell the truth - might affect Diane's treatment.
I'll find a neighbour to look in on the boys, but I'll clean the kitchen first.
I don't want anyone seeing that mess.
There's so much to hide.
Shelagh.
So much for getting back to nature.
There are flowers on the table and feathers in these pillows.
That is all the nature I need to get back to.
The children haven't come knocking.
Do you suppose they're sleeping well? Either that, or they've been mauled to death by squirrels! - Shelagh.
- Mm? I want to call the surgery.
Why? Because it will put my mind at rest.
And then we'll REALLY be able to enjoy our holiday.
Instead of pretending.
Diane's gone into theatre now.
The ward sister suggested you go home and telephone later.
Am I going to lose her? No.
You aren't.
All I could think about was her reputation.
I had to get married when she was on the way.
No white wedding for me - it was straight down the registry in a plum two-piece I borrowed off my cousin.
One day, Diane will find a man that's worthy of her.
And I for one will be outside that church watching you flinging confetti.
I put a flannel in her mouth to stop her from screaming.
I never even let her hold him.
I'm not cruel by nature.
But I don't know which is worse.
I think it's time that you put all that behind you now, Thora.
Make a fresh start.
Won't be a fresh start, though, will it? Not if I keep on keeping secrets.
No! Ah, hello, operator? I'd like to be connected to a number in Poplar, London, please.
- A uterine inversion? - Yes.
At a home delivery.
I should never have come away.
We're going home.
Please, don't touch me.
Oh, Sister.
What were you thinking of, cycling alone? We always do.
I thought I thought my habit would protect me.
But that was my arrogance, my fault.
You are not to even say the word "fault"! Do you hear me? I won't allow it.
Sister.
What happened? I wasn't raped.
Before you ask me, I can say that.
I wasn't raped.
You were viciously attacked.
Just now, the details don't matter.
I don't want you to come near me! I don't want anybody to touch me at all.
I'll call Sergeant Noakes.
Do you know the worst thing? No.
I don't know.
And I can't imagine it.
The worst thing is that I'd actually stopped to pray.
I'd stopped, because I wanted to raise my prayers with yours to sing inside my soul, when my Sisters were singing.
I wanted to give thanks for Trixie's skill, for what she'd done, for the fact Diane had survived.
And it was one of the most beautiful moments I'd ever known.
I felt so close to God, and then it happened.
Sister, would it help you to pray now? - Pray now? - Yes.
No.
Sergeant Noakes wants to interview you.
And you will have to be examined by a doctor.
No.
I can't.
Don't make me.
If no-one speaks out, this is going to go on happening and happening All I can think about now is what happened this morning, when I thought God was at my shoulder.
And there was someone else behind me all the time.
Sister Don't talk to me gently! Don't be kind! Because I'm angry! I'm angry, and I don't know what to do, or or or what God wants of me.
I don't even know if He wants anything at all! Sister just let me hold you by the hand.
I wouldn't be able to feel it.
It's as if I'm behind glass.
Or He's behind glass.
Scared to move in case everything breaks.
- Can I speak to her? - She doesn't want to.
And I cannot and will not force her to.
- She's been brutalised enough.
- Sister.
Someone has to talk to us.
Or I don't know where it's going to end.
Sister, you're meant to be resting.
I want to have a bath.
You can't.
You have to be examined.
Why? I know what he did.
I was there.
If you want a bath, you have one.
But please let us help you.
Just don't lock the door.
You were knocked unconscious this morning.
Please don't lock the door.
Judith.
After years and years of caring for mothers and babies, I found that all pain passes, in the end.
I know that.
I do know that.
Sometimes it won't take its leave until we acknowledge it, that it's there.
Or WHY it's there.
I didn't want to talk to anybody.
You thought it could've been Colin.
The police could've thought I was on the game! Out at night, coming home with bite marks.
- But we know the truth, Judith.
Not all of it.
I'm a bad mother, Sister.
And I was punished.
Can Colin come in? 'Babies cry.
Everybody knows babies cry.
' But when it's yours, you can't ignore it.
Ignoring's not allowed.
It isn't even possible.
So I thought I'd try the walking at night.
You always give good advice.
But it didn't make any difference.
And the crying gets inside your head and in the end you can't tell if it's him screaming or you screaming.
And Love.
It's all right.
And so I parked the pram, and I walked away.
I walked away.
I abandoned my baby.
All I wanted was to not hear that crying any more.
And then I felt him grab me from behind The man who hurt you? I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'M sorry.
I should've known I should've helped you.
I can tell you.
I wanted to tell you.
But how can I go to the police? If I tell them the truth, I'll have social workers on me saying I'm an unfit mother.
And I am.
You are not.
And you've done nothing to be ashamed of.
That's not true.
And I'm not going to speak to the police.
Thank you.
There is a time for us to mortify our flesh.
And a time to cherish it, and marvel at its strength.
I've changed my mind.
You want to go to the police? Other women can't because they're too afraid.
Afraid they'll get the blame.
Afraid of what other people will think of them.
And I'm afraid of so many things.
But not that.
He smelled of alcohol.
Not beer.
I know what beer smells like, but it wasn't that.
And he was taller than me, but not as tall as some men.
And when when he turned me round to face him, I saw - quite clearly - that he had tattoos on both hands.
Is it working girls he went for? He went for defenceless women who were going about their ordinary business.
It's prison work.
Soot or ink rubbed into cuts made with a knife.
I don't know that one.
This one says he's a convicted brigand.
This one says what he thinks of his sentence.
I've had more old lags than you can shake a stick at come through these doors, and I've never seen tats like that.
I have.
You get them on the Soviet lads, the ones that come in with the Merchant Marine.
- Soviet? - So all you need to do is look up what ship's come in under their flag.
I've brought your tetanus jab, I'm afraid.
- How are you feeling? - Lighter.
I thought, at first, that it was a test of faith.
But it was only a test of strength.
I can bear more than I ever thought I could.
And I can bear it for others, because my strength is a gift from Him.
I can tell the truth, and not be ashamed.
It's like singing.
EVERY voice counts.
Aren't you going to look at him? He's beautiful, Diane.
I've already got three little brothers.
He's your son.
I could've killed you.
Because I-I didn't want you ruined.
Because I'd rather lie all my life - all your life, and his - than tell the world to take a running jump.
People are going to wonder where your bump went.
And if they ask me, I'll tell them the truth.
Can I hold him? Don't ask me.
Just take him.
He's yours.
I'm a mum, Mum.
And I don't even know where to start.
You just did.
'And as the summer inched towards its close, 'Dr Turner found a more reliable locum, 'and the family had a proper holiday at last.
'There was no pretend enjoyment this time.
Everything was real.
' Art History tonight? No.
I think it's about time I came clean.
I have no interest whatever in Art History and I'm actually going to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting.
I go every week, and I've been going for ten months.
Good for you.
I think it's absolutely splendid.
'New truths were being spoken at Nonnatus House 'but some remained concealed' And for thy righteousness sake while one voice rose, striving to erase its agony in song.
And of thy goodness slay mine enemies.
It has been declared to be 100% effective in preventing pregnancy.
It's a miracle with moral implications.
Barge people are a law unto themselves.
There's help, and there's interference.
- Fetch me my clothes.
- Mrs Blacker - Fetch 'em! There's been a weather warning on the wireless.
Gale force nine across London! Straight out of Whitaker's Almanack.
You should batten down the hatches.
I'm sure there's no need for us to be alarmed.
Morning, Sister Julienne.
Sister Mary Cynthia.
I know there is no need to be The eyes of God are smiling down on me When daylight fades And in the sky the stars appear
Previous EpisodeNext Episode