CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Episode Scripts

N/A - Table Stakes

(rockmusic playing ) Hello, Rick.
"Living in a shack in a one-horse town "Trying to get to heaven 'fore the sun going down Welcome.
Congratulations, Patrick.
Well, thank you, Sheriff.
Your presence here means a lot tonight.
Is that for me? You talking about the glass or the bubbly? I was talking about the smile on yourface.
( laughing ): Well, if I'm smiling, it's because we raised $1.
6 million for Mrs.
Richmond's Burn Center tonight.
That sort of generosity deserves a raise of the glass, huh? To Portia.
MRS.
BURTON: To Portia.
It's a shame she couldn't be here tonight.
"Oh, she came on "with an alligator smile We did it.
We sure did.
( woman screaming ) ( sirens approaching ) Nice tux, Sheriff.
Do you know whose house this is? To know this town is to know its celebrities and their histories.
Portia Richmond was a legendary showgirl in her day.
That's not her.
Maybe 30 years ago when she was the headliner at the Lido de Paris.
Who found her? Look around you.
( sighing ) This is going to take all night.
Come for the hors d'oeuvres-- stay for the interrogation.
"Who are you? "Who, who, who, who? "Who are you? "Who, who, who, who? "l really wanna know "Who are you? "Oh-oh-oh Who "Come on, tell me who are you, you, you Oh, you!" Yes, sir.
Well, I'll do my best.
All right, you guys, like I said on the phone it was a big party and it's a huge house so we're going to divide and conquer.
Nick, tonight you do the overall sketch, all right? Catherine and Warrick, you got the pool area.
I'll take the shallow end.
Guess I'm going deep.
STOKES: I wonder how much it costs to feed all these fish.
Marco? Hold on.
You want to get out of there, sir? The pool closed at sundown.
Can I get you a towel, sir? Yeah, please.
What'd you find? Looks like a cufflink.
Initials "C.
M.
" Turquoise and silver.
Breaks down the regionality to the southwest-- maybe Arizona, New Mexico, Texas.
Good catch, pal.
You get the guest list.
Check for C.
M.
s.
I'll be wet all night.
( machine whirring ) I detect a bitter alkaloid.
Don't tell anybody.
My weakness.
One macchiato, tall.
Coffee machine courtesy of the city, I presume? When the coroner asks for something, they don't question it.
-Cheers.
-Cheers.
Come on.
Have we lD'd her yet? Working on it.
She's had a few upgrades.
Submalar augmentation.
Rhinoplasty.
Silicone breasts.
Run a serial number on the implants.
Instant lD.
Our field's come a long way, hasn't it? Hmm.
Got a whole menu here.
Petechiael hemorrhaging, bruising around the neck broken hyoid bone.
She was strangled.
No water in the lungs, but she was dead before she hit the water.
( slurping ) Strangulation's a man's crime.
Preaching to the converted.
Do me a favor, Doc.
Photograph her injuries.
Run a sex assault kit.
Include infrared for subdural bruising.
This is our little secret.
Okay.
-Hey.
-Hi.
glass elevator.
You're on it.
This is a big case.
I'm in a groove here.
Well, groove on down to the Strip.
What ever happened to "You cross the tape, you go the distance"? I was probably saying that to get you to service my needs at the time.
( ringing ) Great.
Hey, Sara.
You sleeping? Oh Excuse me for a minute.
Hi.
Well, I got the horsepower on everybody here.
know nothing, saw nothing.
Big surprise.
What about Portia Richmond? BRASS: Well according to her friends, she's been romancing some young stallion for over a month.
She's in love.
She's cruising the Mediterranean on some yacht, eating cheese cubes.
Got a couple watching the house.
Apparently, she often takes in strays.
Mr.
and Mrs.
Haynes, this is Gil Grissom and Catherine Willows.
They're from the crime lab.
Hi.
Do you mind if we ask you a few more questions? By all means.
How is it that you know Portia Richmond? Oh, we met her at the Murado at the top of the Mediterranean.
You need an oil well in your backyard to belong to that place.
Private club, 50 grand a year just to walk through the door.
But worth every penny.
It was like we'd known Portia all our lives.
Does that ever happen to you? No.
PATRlCK: We were new in town.
Portia introduced us around, and took us under her wing.
We were from back East, and we had mutual acquaintances.
And you're house-sitting? Or you're living in? House-sitting while hunting for our own place.
Portia refused to take any money from us.
She wouldn't even let us pay for a dinner.
PATRlCK: That's why when she took off to Europe AMANDA: We offered to host this charity event.
It's the least we could do.
After all, we know how to throw a party.
You can say that again.
Did you know the deceased woman? No.
And you, Miss? Well, as far as I know she wasn't even on the guest list.
Something wrong? Yes.
A woman's dead.
Lacey Duvall murdered.
She was here last night.
Unbelievable.
Could you put us in touch with someone who was close to her? Sure.
Rachel Carson.
They were best friends.
Like sisters.
She's in back.
Follow me.
Close your mouth.
She was seeing some rich married guy.
Did he have a name? Yeah, but she wouldn't tell me.
You know, that's the thing, it was so weird.
He refused to tell her anything about himself.
Anything.
I told her it gave me the creeps but you couldn't talk to her.
You know? WlLLOWS: Turned on by the mystery and the sex.
I've been there.
Hi.
Do you need a hand with that? Uh no, thanks.
I'll be fine.
Are you a doctor? Of sorts.
I'm just, um Iooking around.
See anything you like? Yes.
I do.
( "Waltz of the Flowers" playing ) Catherine? Tchaikovsky's "Waltz of the Flowers.
" What's with the smile? It's playing our song.
Detective Conroy.
What happened? You get bumped from first class? No.
I do my best work solo.
On the clock, that is.
What you got? Walk-through.
In plain sight.
Risky move.
All around the ten-ring, once between the eyes.
Entry wound give you anything? Small caliber? You like to work solo.
Take a look for yourself.
Any thoughts? Professional hit.
Hey, well, how did the Knicks make out? Better than you.
( shots firing ) Times have changed since the canary days, huh? "Canary days?" Brass told me back in the day when the mob would make a hit they'd leave a canary, 'cause the guy sang.
And the quarter stands for? "Call someone who cares.
" It's almost like the guy wants to get caught.
When you leave a gun, you know it's clean.
The gun just traces back to itself.
Killer cut you off at the knees.
What do you do now? All I can do-- follow protocol.
You're going to print the entire elevator? It's like the Circle Bar on a Friday night Three million people on top of each other.
WlLLOWS: Let me guess: You're wondering why Lacey Duvall had a music box engraved to Portia Richmond.
-You think? -Maybe it's as simple as they knew each other and she gave it to her.
If they knew each other, why wasn't she on the guest list? March 7, 1969 mean anything to you? Meant something to the Richmonds.
You know, when Eddie and I were first married-- when things were kind of good? On the anniversary of the day we met, he always gave me a lace teddy.
Well, I mean, I know it's not a music box, but Music box, lace teddy, it's all the same thing.
It's tradition.
And the joy of tradition is in the constant repetition.
Right.
( music playing ) What am l, working food and beverage at one of the hotels? I haven't had a day off in three weeks.
I mean, if they're going to call me in, throw me a bone.
Give me the 419 on the elevator.
-Someone's bitter.
-I'm tired.
You? Tired? I thought you never sleep.
( yawning ) ( rap music blaring ) STOKES: What up, G? You're awake.
I hate you.
A couple of glasses of Merlot.
Rack of lamb on my day off.
I slept like a baby yesterday.
You look horrible.
Thanks, Greg.
Don't look at me.
I've got Sunshine all night.
Check for DNA in the sexual assault kit and the fingernail, please.
Everything has to be in CODlS, A.
S.
A.
P.
Oh, is that all? I want to know who's going to authorize my overtime.
Suck it up, Greg.
You're well rested.
You want a Valium for her? I heard that.
March 7, 1973.
March 7, 1981.
March 7, 1956.
March 7, 1986.
I bet he gave her one every anniversary until he died.
She wouldn't give away a gift this sentimental.
( "Fur Elise" playing ) It's not "Waltz of the Flowers.
" ( thumping ) The seal on the door wasn't broken.
( thumping continues ) ( groaning ) ( knocking ) Las Vegas Police Department.
( moaning ) Caught in the act.
I think that was the point.
Oh, yeah.
No, I can't drink any more coffee.
My body clock is so screwed up.
I just want a steak and a shot.
Tut's Tomb.
Steak and eggs, $1.
99.
Food? Good idea.
You're on.
-It's what I live for.
You guys are never going to believe this.
-You ready? -So much for the steak.
I'll take the coffee.
Yeah.
Okay, sexual assault kit on Lacey Duvall-- that showgirl-- came back positive for semen, but that's nothing.
Ran it through CODlS.
Seminal DNA matches a cold case from Texas.
Dead cheerleader! Ten years ago! Two for one.
Okay, I'm up.
Sir, I have four criminalists working on this.
No As soon as we find something tangible I'll call you, I promise.
Sheriff? Yeah, he calls me every hour.
I can't get anything done.
Every half for me.
I hope we didn't embarrass you.
A little late for that.
Yeah, uh Hi.
I just have a few more questions about the whereabouts of Mrs.
Richmond.
Fire away.
Drinks for anybody else? No, thank you.
( clears throat ) So, let's, uh Iet's just take baby steps.
Where is she? On a yacht somewhere in the Greek lsles.
And if someone wanted to reach her? You have a compass? Yeah.
She's incommunicado.
Big word.
Have we done something wrong? What? May I have your straw? I I collect them.
( laughs ) Thank you.
Oh mind if I look around a little? All right.
The hostesses' bedroom.
Mm-hmm.
Too kinky.
Let me see if Portia took her bathing suit with her.
Here we go.
WlLLOWS: Uh We've got a bathing suit, lingerie, jewels wallet, bags I'm not so sure she's gone anywhere.
Shall we do the room, too? I think the tooth fairy might have just left us a piece of Portia Richmond.
What? Take a look.
Ugh.
WlLLOWS: I guess now we have two cases.
We've got a body without a murderer and a murder without a body.
Oh, man, I got to get a raise for this.
Greg why don't you start the DNA profile on the tooth so that we can tell if it's Portia Richmond.
Okay, well, but getting the DNA from the tooth is going to be easy.
What am I supposed to compare it to? How about the toothbrush and the hairbrush that we took from her vanity? Why don't you go talk to the dead-end twins over there? Nothing.
Hmm.
So, either she's extremely hygienic, or Somebody did some serious spring cleaning.
If you want to know if it's Portia, you got to get the DNA somewhere.
I can't believe I've been in this town 20 years and I've never seen the Liberace Museum.
That's funny, I was just here a couple days ago.
I believe it.
We have all of Liberace's costumes on display here.
This one, for example, worn by Mr.
Liberace in the 1984 World's Fair in New Orleans.
-Lovely.
-Mmm.
Did you ever see one of the old shows? The Lido in the '50s? Before my time.
You weren't even born then, of course.
Every dancer was from France and the attention to detail in the costumes was unparalleled.
And the audience dressed to the nines.
-Oh, yeah.
-The town was different then.
The other great cities-- New York, Chicago London-- they restored.
But in this town, they destroy.
Hmm.
So you want to see what belonged to Portia Richmond? Yes, please.
Folies Berg áre Yeah um, looks heavy.
Imagine that on your head, two shows a night.
She used over 15 combs and various epoxies and glues.
They damn near had to drive a spike in her head to keep it from falling off.
-Ow.
She lost all her hair.
DNA heaven.
SHlBLEY: Warrick personal artifacts from your elevator victim.
Cool.
You got an lD for me? The driver's license is local.
Tyson Green, 35.
Can't drive without corrective lenses.
Too bad he wasn't driving that elevator.
Ooh, Chicago bankroll.
This guy's not from out of town.
No, that's just a term.
Old school.
"Shrimp Cocktail Appetizer.
Surf & Turf Dinner.
Two Glasses of Wine.
" All comped.
Free food.
Nice.
It ain't free, believe me.
You okay? Yeah.
Yeah.
A long time since I seen these.
( footsteps approaching ) Hey, Brown.
Just talked to Bobby Dawson in ballistics.
He ran that.
22 from the elevator.
Serial number came back-- Vincent Morgan.
Lives on the West side.
-Cool.
-Coming? Yeah.
Will you log these for me? Yeah.
Mandy, you got any prints off of that quarter I found on the vic? Still working on it, Warrick.
I don't work one case a day.
( ripping ) Bingo.
Well, that only took What do you got? A hit off Patrick Haynes' social security number.
There's only one problem.
He's an eight-month-old infant that died 10 years ago.
Same social? You're sure? Bam! Oh, yeah.
( scatting and humming ) "Match, boom, match, boom "Match, boom "Boom "Match.
You want to take that thing off your head, Greg? -It's evidence.
-Cool your jets, Cath.
I already got all the evidence out of it.
Now it's all woman.
Did you ever wear one of these when you were dancing? I wore nothing but skin.
Ooh.
( clears throat ) I, uh, compared the DNA from the tooth with hairfollicles found inside the headdress.
I think we have a match, sir.
And I think we may have a homicide.
Excuse me.
So, did I break the law by not reporting it? It's a good idea that when your house is robbed you report that your registered gun was stolen.
Guy's story checks out.
He was robbed.
My wife's not comfortable about having the gun in the house since we had our boy and I told her that l'd gotten rid of it but I never did.
I mean, man, the last thing I ever expected was it'd be used in a murder.
We're going to keep your name on ice for a while.
Thanks for your time.
Hey, thanks, right on.
Oh, hey, bring up car 309! Nobody kills anybody with their registered gun anymore.
Isn't that the truth.
Jim Hey.
We got the whole place clocked.
Keeping an eye on the Haynes couple.
Sheriff doesn't want them skipping town.
And neither do we.
We have a strong suspicion Portia Richmond is dead.
Did you see that? They're on the grift.
She took that fur from right under their noses.
Hi.
May we check your coats? What are you, a couple of kleptos? I don't follow.
A $5,000 stole your wife stole? What, are you guys in business? Amanda didn't know she had taken it till Mr.
Grissom here told her.
Is that kind of like the guywho, uh walks out of the auto mall with a Nissan Sentra in his pocket? Why am I here? Why? GRlSSOM: Jim may l? Mr.
Haynes, we ran a sexual assault kit on Lacey Duvall.
We found semen.
Can you explain that? Yeah.
Yeah, my wife's not here.
Time to convert lies into the truth.
I had sex with Lacey before the party.
Would you mind giving us a DNA sample? No.
My relationship with Lacey was purely sexual.
It was good sex.
Well great sex.
Whenever we could steal a moment, uh, we did.
Just like an addiction.
Well, in addition to exchanging bodily fluids, did you exchange gifts? Whatever do you mean? Just answerthe question.
No.
No, I never gave her anything.
We found a music box in Lacey Duvall's dressing area that belonged to Portia Richmond.
Did you give it to her? Honestly no.
Those music boxes belonged to Portia, not to me.
But Lacey had been by the house and she did admire them.
You saying that she lifted it? Human nature.
We always covet what we can't have.
What did you covet from Portia Richmond? ( door opens ) Grissom? Can I talk to you? Are you looking for work? -I just -The sign says, "Do not enter.
" You can't read anymore? You're blind? What? -Grissom, this is important.
-This is important.
Sometimes in interrogations, Nick you get one chance; one answer.
And while I'm out here screwing around with you, he's in there thinking up an answer that he didn't have before you walked in.
We matched the DNA taken from Lacey Duvall to a cold case in Texas ten years ago.
And? The suspect's name was Chad Matthews.
C.
M.
Okay, I'm starting to forgive you.
Sara ran Patrick Haynes' social.
The real Haynes is deceased.
So, Patrick Haynes is Chad Matthews and Chad Matthews is on the run.
And he just ran into us.
Good morning.
Nice to have you back.
Do you have any idea what the hot topic of conversation is going to be when I walk into that breakfast? You're announcing your candidacy for mayor? That's cute.
Patrick Haynes is in custody.
Does he have anything to do with Portia Richmond's vanishing act? Haynes is in lockup awaiting extradition to Texas on an unrelated matter.
So in the meanwhile, we're questioning him in connection with Portia Richmond's disappearance.
You know, I think you're going to get my vote for mayor.
What have we got on Richmond? A canine.
Her dog.
Her tooth.
What about the rest of her? Still looking.
Well, look harder, 'cause if someone Ieaks it to the press that she's dead and then she gets off a Lear Jet at McCarran with a tan we're both going to have egg on our face and I'm going to hold you responsible.
Portia Richmond got me elected, Grissom.
I was at her party.
Do you see what this does to me? Evidence is like fine wine, Brian.
You can't just open the bottle and drink it.
You got to let it breathe.
Look, I'm going to lay this on the line right here and now.
You find me Portia Richmond or you find me a motive for her murder 'cause I'm in your kitchen till it's solved.
Make yourself at home.
Where you been? Proctologist.
Sheriff getting your ass, huh? Well, I just hit megabucks.
Austin PD has five aliases for Chad Matthews.
Tom Sheridan, wanted in Beacham County.
Petty theft, check fraud.
Warner Drysdale, wanted in Sacramento.
Grand larceny, car theft.
Guy took a car for a test drive never brought it back.
Jock Jasper-- I'm not making these names up-- extorted money from a rich widow in Denver.
-Busy boy.
-Yeah, and organized, too.
The Denver PD sent me copies of his journal.
Guy kept lists of rich women all around the country.
Logged in all their vitals.
Height, weight, how much money they have, you name it.
Guess who was on that list.
Does her name begin with a "P"? Well according to her credit card statements, Portia Richmond hasn't spent a dime since she's been in the Mediterranean.
-She's dead.
-Oh, not necessarily.
Maybe she's been swept off her feet.
Hmm.
Yeah, some guys still like to foot the bill.
Really? How would you know? Hey, I only go Dutch if girls ask the wrong question.
And what question is that, Nick? "What do you drive?" -It's an honest question.
-No.
No, it's not.
What it means is, "How much money do you make so you can take care of me.
" Well, not this girl.
Boys and girls, we've got ourselves a forgery.
Ooh.
Either that or a dimpled ballot.
Well, his name is Shad.
Hmm.
Let's connect the dots.
-What does that mean? -Here, I'll show you.
Catherine, you wear pierced earrings.
May l? All right, but I've had them on for a week.
Can't account for what's on it.
Sign your name, please.
Okay.
Now, nobody signs their signature exactly the same way twice.
Not even you, chicken scratch.
If they do, then one of them's a forgery.
Here's where connecting the dots comes in.
We dot the lines and curves of the signature.
WlLLOWS: Which leaves indentations on the blank page and then you connect the dots, get rid of the evidence but, obviously they didn't.
Well, that's scary.
All you need is one signature to break somebody.
You look terrible.
I been spinning my wheels.
I'm never going to solve this case.
It was over before it began.
That doesn't sound like you.
I got a dead man in a glass elevator with a bazillion prints and a.
22 caliber bullet.
It's virtually untraceable.
He left the gun at the scene.
You know what that means.
Hit man with a ghost.
But I got two things left, right? Make that one thing.
You got to be kidding me.
It gets worse.
Got a print off your quarter.
Ran it through AFlS.
Came back your dead man.
Pretty gruesome.
Want to share? I was just thinking what old man Binion told Steve Wynn when he hit town.
Always give a gambler an excuse to gamble and he'll thank you for it.
Was your guy a gambler? A bunch of cash receipts in his pocket.
Markers all over town.
Once you get to that place there's no getting out.
Who picked this place? Me.
I thought it would be nice.
Okay, you can pick up the tab.
Let's keep talking about motive.
Let's.
I don't think a forged signature is a slam dunk for murder.
Hey, did anyone tell Grissom where we were having lunch? Yeah, Dispatch left him a message.
Maybe he thought it was the sheriff and blew it off.
Right.
Hey! You might want to take your face away from that.
Really? Why is that? SlDLE: This Chilean sea bass is wonderful.
So is this.
Okay, you got your missing widow.
Her bloody tooth found in her own bedroom which is currently occupied by two moes.
"Moes.
" I'm rubbing off on you.
No, you're not, and stay out of my sea bass.
Oh, that is good.
One of our moes has six names that we know of including Chad Matthews.
Right, right, and we've got a cuff link with the initials C.
M.
found in the bottom of the pool along with a floating showgirl.
Who was sleeping with six men rolled into one-- Patrick Haynes.
Hey.
Photos of your showgirl.
What did I miss? It's not what you missed it's what seems to be missing.
A fingernail? STOKES: Okay, Patrick Haynes.
Or whoever.
Whoever.
He commits a murder ten years ago.
Why give up your DNA so easily? Exactly.
I mean, you know, you can change your name.
You can't change your blueprint.
Right on.
SlDLE: Risk versus reward.
You sleep with someone, you kill 'em, the heat's on.
You flee, or, you roll the dice and maybe you get your cookie.
What's the cookie? The cheese, brother.
Maybe that 1.
6 mil they raised at the charity event that night.
The Hayneses controlled Portia Richmond's bank account, including the Burn Center account but they had to stick around for the checks to clear.
-So why kill Lacey Duvall? -Excellent question.
I don't know, but if Lacey Duvall hadn't been murdered Patrick Haynes reinvents himself becomes another skippy in another state, $1.
6 mil richer.
Wait, wait.
Time out, now.
I had half a Caesar and a coffee.
How's my end 20 bucks? You want to go dutch, Nick? Excellent idea, Sara.
You're catching on.
I'd love to.
Uh, Brass, cough it up.
Cover Nick's, too.
He had that tiramisu.
I hate going out to lunch with you CSls.
You notice everything.
Hey.
Whatever happened to the fingernail that Catherine found at the crime scene? Got the results right here.
First things first.
Not a match to Patrick Haynes.
I never figured a man for the fingernail, Greg.
Okay, but here's where you break out the can of creep repellent.
The fingernail and the semen share half the DNA markers in common.
Possible first-degree relative? Do me a favor.
Run this for me.
What is that, lip gloss? You tell me.
BRASS: On behalf of the state of Nevada my apologies.
You've been cleared of all charges.
It took three of you to tell me that? But on behalf of the state of Texas you're under arrest.
You're being extradited for the murder of Lana Grimshaw.
I slept with her, but I didn't kill her.
WlLLOWS: Huh.
Just like with Lacey Duvall.
Absolutely.
Mm-hmm.
Now I see it.
What? See what? The family resemblance.
Donnie and Marie.
Brother and sister and I got the DNA to prove it.
Let me tell you what else I can prove.
Your sister killed Lacey Duvall.
He told me he loves me.
No more faking love.
No more acts.
Is that what he told you? That's an act? It's as real as it gets.
Patrick says you're small time.
You don't have the stones to go big.
You don't know Patrick.
You mean Chad? He gave me this.
You know what's next.
It's my turn.
( snap ) You're surprised? Look at your face.
You never made a mistake until you met her.
You killed Lacey because I told her about us? I had no choice.
We were partners.
You can't grift me, Chad.
Uh Who wants to tell us about Portia Richmond? She's in Europe.
On a yacht, in Greece.
Oh, right.
She's incommunicado.
Old Testament.
The Book of Jonah.
"And now, the Lord arranged for a great fish to swallow up Jonah.
" You know what's wrong with the piranha, though? They've got high cholesterol.
Cholesterol is found in humans, not fish.
So how does a fish acquire human cholesterol? You want to fill in the blanks? Hey, Portia.
You're both under arrest for the murder of Portia Richmond.
These belong to Tyson Green.
ust came to let you know he won't be paying up.
What's he, dead? Yeah.
( women screaming ) It's machine 25 again.
Been spitting silver all day.
It's a good day to gamble.
WOMAN: Vegas, NFL football, a guy like you.
Come on, you trying to tell me that you didn't make a little pit stop? GRlSSOM: What you do on your time is nobody's business.
What you do on my time, is my business.
MAN: Warrick Brown had one of my guys sub for him in court but I have it on good authority that he was gambling.
WOMAN: Warrick has a problem.
Ignoring it isn't going to make it go away.
BROWN: I won't let you down again.
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